Episode Transcript
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0:03
Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production
0:05
of I Heart Radio. Good
0:09
Morning, This is Laura. Welcome
0:12
to the Before Breakfast podcast. Today's
0:15
tip is to keep small things small.
0:18
Not everything warrants a big response. And
0:21
by keeping small things small, as the saying
0:23
goes, you save your time and energy
0:25
for things that truly do warrant your attention.
0:28
You'll probably be happier too. If
0:31
you're like most people, you no doubt find yourself
0:33
annoyed when things in life aren't quite right.
0:36
I know I do. Maybe your neighbor
0:38
leaves his garbage bins on the curb for days,
0:41
or maybe your workplace sends pointless email
0:43
newsletters that you can't unsubscribe
0:45
from. If you're listening to this
0:47
podcast, my guess is that you have high
0:50
standards for yourself and you try to
0:52
find solutions to problems that come up in your
0:54
life. That's generally a good thing.
0:57
Sometimes, though, our attempts to find
0:59
solutions can cost more than
1:01
the problems they're trying to solve. That's
1:04
when it pays to keep small things small. The
1:07
first way to keep small things small is to recognize
1:10
them as small things. Ask
1:12
yourself, how much does this affect my
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life or the lives of the people I care
1:16
about. Sometimes the answer
1:18
will be not much. These
1:21
are occasions to practice patients. You
1:24
can smile after someone cuts in front of you
1:26
in the line to exit from the highway. Maybe
1:29
the person is a thoughtless jerk, or
1:31
maybe it's a tourist in a rental car who
1:33
had no idea that that's where the exit was. In
1:36
any case, you know that you will still
1:39
get to work on time at your high paying
1:41
job, or you do challenging, meaningful
1:44
work alongside clever colleagues.
1:46
I mean, really, what does it matter
1:48
to you? If you're not sure
1:51
whether you're dealing with a small thing, try
1:53
what Richard Carlson, author of Don't
1:56
Sweat the Small Stuff, calls the time
1:58
warp. Imagine yourself a
2:00
year from now, how much does this
2:02
issue matter? Most likely,
2:04
you won't remember your commute two days from
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now, let alone a year from now. Or
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you can ask yourself whose issue
2:11
is this? Anyway, it might
2:13
be nice if your colleague didn't use double
2:15
exclamation points and all his emails, but
2:18
this hardly reflects upon you. You You might
2:20
prefer that your high schooler look a little less
2:22
like she had slept in her clothes, but again
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to eat her own. Psychologist
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Wendy Mogul, in her book The Blessing of a b
2:30
Minus, encourages parents to
2:32
allow themselves to appreciate their kids
2:34
as they figure out who they are, even
2:36
when their tastes or hobbies they
2:39
seem a little odd. She offers
2:41
an old Hebrew prayer, thank
2:44
you God for varying the creatures.
2:46
The next time you find yourself about to get annoyed
2:49
or want to fix something that isn't actually your
2:51
problem, just say to yourself, what
2:53
a world plenty of surprises and
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leave other people to their exclamation points
2:58
or odd bawl fashion. Sometimes,
3:01
though, you may feel like a small thing is
3:03
having an adverse effect on you or someone else,
3:06
and you feel the urge to address it.
3:08
Even then, a little perspective is wise.
3:11
I find it helpful to imagine how a conversation
3:14
about the issue might unfold.
3:17
Suppose you have a monthly conference call that
3:19
consistently starts ten minutes late.
3:22
You faithfully log on at the scheduled time,
3:25
only to spend ten minutes talking about the weather.
3:28
As you think about bringing this up with the person
3:30
who convenes the call, try to imagine
3:32
what you would say try to imagine
3:34
how he might respond. Are you
3:36
feeling stumped about what you might say?
3:39
That doesn't sound petty about
3:41
this ten minutes every month? Or you
3:43
have to talk about the weather. If
3:45
so, plan for the delay,
3:47
come up with your best weather jokes, or
3:50
just dial in late yourself. Other
3:52
times, though, imagining the conversation will
3:54
help you figure out how to keep a small thing in perspective
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while constructively addressing its.
4:00
Suppose you frequently learned about special programs
4:02
at your kids school just a few days before you
4:05
either scramble to rearrange your work schedule
4:07
or your kids are disappointed when you can't be there.
4:10
At first blush, you might think to respond to
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the teacher's next email with your frustration
4:14
about this, but that might make the
4:16
teacher feel guilty and probably doesn't
4:19
help the long term goal of a good relationship,
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so instead you envision another option.
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When you have a hunch that there's an event coming up,
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you reach out to your child's teacher to ask if
4:29
there's something you should anticipate. Hello,
4:31
Mrs Rogers. With springbreak around the corner,
4:33
I wondered if there might be a class party.
4:36
I'm eager to get it on the calendar so I can
4:38
arrange my schedule to attend. Hopefully
4:41
that will elicit at least tentative information
4:43
and maybe even nudge the teacher to give
4:45
a little more notice for special events in the
4:47
future. You kept the small things
4:49
small while still addressing an issue
4:52
that was bothering you. How
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do you manage to keep small things small in your
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life? You can let me know at
4:58
Before Breakfast podcast at i heeart
5:01
media dot com. In the meantime,
5:03
this is Laura. Thanks for listening
5:06
and here's to making the most of our time. Hey,
5:15
everybody, I'd love to hear from you.
5:17
You can send me your tips, your questions, or
5:19
anything else. Just connect with
5:21
me on Twitter, Facebook and Instagram
5:24
at Before Breakfast pod. That's
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b the number four then
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Breakfast p o D. You
5:32
can also shoot me an email at Before Breakfast
5:34
podcast at i heeart media dot com.
5:37
That Before Breakfast is spelled out with all
5:39
the letters. Thanks so much, should I
5:41
look forward to staying in touch. Before
5:48
Breakfast is a production of I Heart Radio.
5:51
For more podcasts from my heart Radio, visit
5:54
the I heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts,
5:56
or wherever you listen to your favorite shows. I
6:00
don't get
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