Episode Transcript
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Yup, we can. We conclude you
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bird breeder, I'm so sick. Tuck
2:07
the author to. I
2:10
just got over a little sickness. Pair
2:12
everyone I know if I die. Awesome!
2:14
surround. The caveat is better Thank you.
2:17
He tried to give it to
2:19
Dave what it is Kiss You
2:22
know that over here in Seattle
2:24
Saluzzi? close circumstance who a little
2:26
smooth smooth see you. Know
2:29
by lover in the second a car that
2:31
and cats are you got was on one
2:34
on. Each I learned dare
2:36
colts. I'm not sick. The are it?
2:38
It. Hurts our that's what I said I said
2:40
he's take it and I lost my wife
2:42
and my voice that De la Hoya he went
2:45
out and I'm honored said if if you're that's
2:47
a that's a symptom being set for to have
2:49
zero the symptoms his job yeah okay but you're
2:51
I don't because that's what happens. We have
2:53
no voice that's called the called. Natural.
2:56
I've written a margarita. This argument.
2:59
Yeah. They do. You feel like you have
3:01
a cold now I feel I guess is germs
3:03
are inside the Us is coming. Yet
3:05
they smith whole we all the way to say
3:08
terms. I spent all we can call think ah
3:10
you've got a call for weeks or months I
3:12
haven't caught at all. You do I'm not
3:14
all by one clip of me coughing the star
3:16
weekend it doesn't exactly. You guys are fighting like
3:19
a couple. Ah
3:21
be found A. New
3:24
episode where he is sick. Austin is
3:26
sex not as like. Awesome!
3:28
Trying to get me sick will not
3:31
happen. Tape Mills and shares Cancer Cancer
3:33
diagnosed as a diagnosis was in the
3:35
middle March madness and I just said
3:37
the come forward because everyone's saying all
3:39
the stuff about are. You. Know
3:41
I felt pretty odd about this one. Yeah.
3:45
i'm wondering are you guys are going
3:47
to feel about the soon as i
3:49
feel bad that she has cancer in
3:51
the sense that i feel bad ah
3:53
i'm anybody has cancer that i don't
3:55
hold a grudge against like nobody wants
3:58
anybody to get cancer right Even
4:00
people I have a grudge, but I don't know her
4:02
person. I was going to say, I
4:04
wasn't devastated and sad. No, I just
4:06
felt bad that the internet bullied her
4:08
into being like, I have cancer, even
4:10
though she's going through such a tough
4:12
time. I fully believed
4:14
the conspiracy. I was like, she's dead. This is a
4:17
clone. You were one of those... You were actually one
4:19
of those... Yeah, my hand up. I
4:21
apologize. I don't feel bad about that though at all.
4:23
You feel bad that she has cancer. Yeah. I
4:26
mean, she's what do they call the
4:28
princess of Wales? For better
4:30
or for worse, when you marry
4:33
into the royal family, you sign
4:36
a social contract that your
4:38
life is public. So it's going to be very
4:40
difficult to hide the fact that you have cancer.
4:43
So whether she's bullied for us, I
4:48
think some people
4:51
have been able to do it. I think the guy
4:53
from Black Panther did it pretty
4:55
well. Yeah, do you have a spokesman? Yeah,
4:57
he went through such a long time. Yeah,
5:00
and kept it quiet. But when you're in
5:02
the... And I mean, there's no comparison obviously
5:04
between an actor, a Hollywood actor and the
5:07
princess of Wales. So yeah, I feel it's
5:09
just awful. Anytime anyone gets cancer, it's sad.
5:13
Yeah. Because people are trying to like break into her
5:17
records and all that stuff. Nothing's surprising. Family
5:20
is a family that everybody wants to know
5:22
about. Travis
5:25
Kelsey, the host, are you
5:27
smarter than a fifth grader? Probably
5:29
be very funny. I kind of like that. Yeah.
5:32
I looked at this and I thought it fit. I
5:34
thought it just made sense to me for some reason.
5:36
Yeah. I could see it. I feel
5:38
like it already happened in another world. I don't think I am
5:40
smarter than a fifth grader. Who
5:43
hosted this last time? Foxworthy. Jeff
5:46
Foxworthy or someone else? I
5:49
don't know why I wanted to say Chris Hansen. That's
5:51
the wrong guy. No, that's the guy who's
5:53
getting... That's another young... That's the catch-up partner.
5:55
That's a different fifth grader show, Bree. Different
5:57
fifth grader show. I thought there was somebody...
6:00
else who did it too. That's
6:03
it? She seems like she'd be good
6:06
at it. Like I feel like what are you doing in
6:08
fifth grade or you gotta be pretty quick. Yeah.
6:10
Yeah is this a game for us to play here? Yeah we do
6:12
have questions for you. Is this for us to part smaller than fifth
6:14
grade if you guys want? Oh I'm definitely smarter than fifth grade. I
6:17
hope we all are. I think we
6:19
should see. Alright yeah I think we
6:21
should see. These are like genius fifth
6:23
graders typically though no? I just like don't
6:25
remember fifth grade. This shit was mad long
6:27
ago. I love
6:32
salamanders. They're already getting weird with
6:34
it but I'm gonna say false.
6:38
They're begging us to say false here.
6:40
They're begging us to say false. They
6:42
are so you think it's true? This
6:44
has nothing to do with our knowledge. It doesn't
6:47
mean out thinking the people on our panel. I'm
6:49
gonna say false even though I think it's true.
6:52
Okay. Okay. Oh false yes. Alright
6:54
cool. Yes. This isn't am I
6:56
smart at fifth grade. This is am I smarter than Devin
6:58
in Austin. I don't think we need these questions.
7:01
I think these are pulled from the actual show. Okay.
7:04
Sure. Okay. Which US state is
7:06
the largest? Texas
7:08
right? I was gonna say Texas. I see
7:11
everything I think I'm like I don't want
7:13
to say. Oh California's big. I'm gonna say
7:15
California. Texas. Alaska. Fuck I
7:17
was gonna say that but no one remembers
7:20
Alaska. I was asking trick ass questions. Alright.
7:22
They're being punk ass, trick ass. Excluding
7:24
Antarctica. I'm a Canadian so I always
7:27
have an out. The
7:29
farthest South? Australia? Is that
7:31
stupid? South? Excluding
7:37
Antarctica which continent reaches
7:39
the farthest South? Excluding
7:44
Antarctica. God
7:50
geography was not my- I'm gonna say
7:52
Africa. If this were math I'd be
7:54
our age. That's where my head was
7:56
going Africa but I'm gonna
7:58
go with Africa. I
8:01
said that. I said Australia. South
8:04
America seems so obvious. It seems too
8:06
obvious. A-blinking,
8:09
yeah. Sure, A-blinking.
8:12
In the sentence, Dave is a very handsome man. What
8:14
part of speech is the word very? Adjective?
8:18
Oh, I didn't even know how that question, the format
8:20
of that question. Adverb?
8:24
Adverb? Fuck.
8:28
See, I told- Guys, we should've narrowed
8:30
this. We should've narrowed
8:32
this. We should've narrowed
8:35
this. I'll just read the question, you
8:37
guys answered. In our solar system, which planet is furthest away
8:39
from the sun? Didn't
8:42
it used to be like Pluto? Pluto's
8:46
about exile. But
8:48
no, it's not a planet anymore. It's not a planet anymore, guys.
8:50
Don't go with that. Imagine being a planet forever and there's a
8:53
dwarf planet. It's a dwarf planet.
8:56
The dwarf planet. Fuck,
8:58
I'm just gonna say like- I'm
9:01
playing Travis Kelsey right now. I'm just reading
9:03
the question. Venus. Neptune,
9:06
I said that. Neptune, fuck. Who
9:10
wrote the famous play Romeo and Juliet? Shakespeare.
9:12
Shakespeare. Get off me. Thank
9:16
you, thank you. Backyard's
9:18
50 feet long and 20 feet wide. Square footage.
9:22
How do you do square footage? I don't do
9:24
square footage. I don't
9:27
do square footage. Who does square footage? I'm not a fucking-
9:29
I'm not a lady. I'm
9:32
gonna say 1,000 square feet. Nice job.
9:37
I told you to put the numbers on the board and I'm good.
9:40
Photosynthesis. Photosynthesis.
9:44
Nice, guys. I think you're right. What is the
9:46
capital of Australia? It's
9:48
fucking- I don't know, Sydney. Sydney? No,
9:50
I don't think it is. I think it's
9:52
Perth. It's Perth, yeah.
9:54
Because I know people always say Sydney, but it's not
9:57
that way. We were totally not even close. Never
10:00
heard of that. I knew it wasn't Sydney though. I knew it
10:02
wasn't so I mean great. I'll say
10:05
we're smarter We don't know what the fifth graders did
10:07
and by the way, that's just memorization if they're in
10:09
class big fucking whoop I thought it's been a while
10:11
since fifth grade. Yeah, this is bullshit
10:13
this next thing Tana mojo likes the Tampa
10:15
Edition Hotel I also saw Who's
10:20
the real estate guy Sirhants.
10:23
Yeah, he went viral because they like
10:25
posting they upgrade him to a suite.
10:27
Let me say this Alright wallet or
10:29
for pork podcast Tana mojo posted about
10:32
saying the addition Tampa calling the hotel
10:34
beautiful and the hotel left for custom
10:36
Cookies and bottom away there. I
10:38
don't know that they're doing this Just
10:40
because I ripped them apart The
10:43
tech that let me say it again, and I'm
10:45
glad it keeps coming up The
10:47
Tampa Bay Edition is the worst
10:49
hotel in America. It's the most
10:51
overpriced ripoff now Whether they
10:53
paid her to do this for free Tana
10:56
mojo by proxy almost should
10:58
be in prison for promoting
11:01
the Tampa Bay Edition It's
11:03
that bad of a hotel I'm
11:06
thinking I'm thinking Tana. They gave Tana
11:08
the room for free gave her all
11:10
these goodies She doesn't know how expensive
11:12
the room probably is and she's like, oh,
11:14
this is sweet I'm getting all this free stuff and it's like
11:17
relatively nice But if she saw the price
11:19
of the room, maybe she wouldn't think it was
11:21
all that I'm texting her
11:24
Right now she posted like 15 stories about
11:26
it the Tampa Bay You
11:29
should be in prison for promoting the Tampa
11:31
Bay. You should be Locked
11:34
up and thrown
11:36
in prison for
11:39
promoting the
11:42
Tampa Bay Now
11:44
here's what the Tampa Bay Edition doesn't really
11:46
get if they're like we're not gonna try
11:48
to Do anything to lower prices make it
11:51
right. They haven't said a word to me
11:54
My word great Tana go do your thing
11:57
my word in this carries probably
12:00
a billion act like I am Seen
12:03
as somebody who like Tana's an influencer
12:06
through and through like posting hotels. She
12:08
probably post a lot of us I
12:10
never talk about hotels until the Tampa
12:12
Bay Edition. I go do pizza reviews.
12:14
I review I give honest reviews the
12:16
Tampa Bay Edition for
12:19
a normal human They
12:22
they should be locked up Tana should be
12:24
locked up It's the most overpriced garbage in
12:26
the world and I stayed shout
12:28
out global ambassador and
12:31
four season four seasons in Boston Global ambassador
12:33
four seasons 2500 the room was 10x 10x
12:38
What the addition was I paid five
12:40
grand the global edition now. They were
12:42
super nice left Like
12:45
presents for Miss Peaches. They had my
12:47
favorite snacks forget it the room itself
12:50
100x Tampa Bay
12:52
Edition that hotel should be
12:54
bold You know, what's five grand a night
12:56
is those huts on the water and
12:59
Bora Bora? Yeah, that is
13:01
crazy the Tampa Bay that's if
13:03
the Tampa Bay Edition was charging 900
13:05
bucks for that sweet I think all
13:07
right. It's a little bit overpriced five
13:09
grand knocked the hotel down knock
13:12
the Tampa Bay Edition down Yeah, they're
13:14
robbing people blind that's rubbing and
13:17
then Tana mojo They got Tana mojo on
13:19
that sir. You should be That
13:22
I bet that's not a coincidence I
13:24
do not think that you're starting to
13:27
see Tampa influencers being like, oh,
13:29
this is a great hotel They'll take a
13:31
paycheck that don't they'll do anything They're
13:33
probably doing a pay addition like
13:36
crypto coins I I
13:38
do think I doubt Tana knows about
13:41
you talking about it or how expensive it
13:43
is now We
13:45
trying to do good PR for us we just
13:47
know I actually I actually believe that like I
13:49
don't think You know,
13:52
I talked to Brooke. Yeah, I talked
13:54
Brooke like every day Yeah,
13:56
because she tagged me. Yeah being like
13:58
we didn't miss They did
14:01
like 300 shows or something and they weren't
14:03
late once. They're like, Dave would be proud.
14:05
I don't know if I was proud. I
14:07
was stunned. Like, that's good. Good for you
14:09
guys. That is great. That is great. Yeah.
14:12
So I was like, great job. And I heard
14:14
you and Josh made up, but this now, Tana,
14:17
it's got to go to jail. That sucks for
14:19
her. A bill of hell. Jail. Jail.
14:22
Maybe she doesn't know how much the rooms cost. That's
14:25
what I'm saying. That's what I think. We did say
14:28
that twice. Yeah. Because if
14:30
you're like, oh, they're so good at Tampa
14:32
Bay Edition, five grand for that piece of
14:34
trash, please. Millie
14:37
Bobby Brown is a Karen. Millie
14:39
Bobby Brown calls those Karens for revealing that she
14:41
leaves reviews under a fake name. Millie says her
14:44
whole life is having people criticize her, so she's
14:46
going to give it back sometimes thinks it's important
14:48
to know where you went wrong. All
14:50
right. That's me being like, yeah, you got to
14:52
let the Tampa Bay Edition know. Yeah,
14:56
that's actually true. I don't think this is, she's
14:58
very much a Karen in this video, but
15:00
she's just so well focused. She's coming in.
15:03
What is she's in a new movie? I saw something. Her
15:05
movie, Damsel. Yes. Did
15:07
you see it? Yeah, no, I just saw her. I
15:10
watched it. How was it? Did you like
15:12
it, Bree? I honestly, yeah, I love
15:14
Millie Bobby Brown. I think it's like probably not
15:16
that good of a movie, but she crushed it.
15:20
Okay. Happy Gilmore
15:22
2 is in the works.
15:24
Do we have to watch this video of her being a Karen?
15:27
No, it's basically what the headline says. Okay. Happy
15:30
Gilmore 2 is in the works. Nice.
15:32
Excited. You got to be
15:34
delicate. You got to be delicate with it. Oh
15:36
yeah. Good. Yeah.
15:39
I wonder what's the lane they go
15:41
down for the second one? Because he's
15:43
old, right? Like Adam Sandler's old at this
15:45
point. Like in the movie world, I'm not
15:47
saying he's like an old man. I guess
15:49
he's like, you know, not as young
15:51
as he was when he filmed the first one, but
15:53
I mean the thing about golf is he could still
15:56
definitely be on poor reasonably. Yeah. Right.
15:59
So do you think it's like, is it? like last last
16:01
tour kind of maybe shoot
16:03
him a Gavin's like as a
16:05
kid is now a bully on tour or something
16:07
or he like comes out he comes back for
16:09
one last tour or something yeah interesting
16:11
okay visible
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and network management practices see
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visible.com Willy Wonka organizer
16:56
says the event ruined his life directive the
16:58
house illuminati organization Billy cool says his life
17:00
is ruined after hosting the Glasgow Willy Wonka
17:02
event that he's lost friends in the love
17:04
of his life after having some mishaps including
17:07
booking too big of a venue and having
17:09
equipment not being delivered Billy thought they could
17:11
push on and when he's when he snapped
17:13
at upset customers he was the worst version
17:15
of himself my life is ruined I've lost
17:17
my friends lost my love I've
17:20
made out to be the face of evil generally
17:22
that's not really the case okay
17:25
damn I don't know if I really feel
17:27
bad for this guy yeah it's a tough
17:29
situation but you put on the
17:31
event yeah like I don't
17:33
know snapped at people that were mad and
17:36
you were evil the worst version of yourself
17:38
seems like you're crazy buddy yeah
17:40
and he looks evil even in this picture
17:42
yeah look at his eyes you know when
17:44
people like smile with their eyes he's frowning with
17:47
his eyes yeah yeah yeah
17:49
it looks like he's growling nicola
17:53
pelts back him cut her husband brooklyn back him
17:55
from her movie nicole pence baucom says brooklyn back
17:57
home is really upset she cut his scene from
18:00
her director of debut in new film Lola. Nicola says
18:02
she had one line but he kept saying a British
18:04
accent was staring directly into the camera. Although she cut
18:06
him and said she wouldn't have been able to make
18:09
the film without his massive support. Who
18:11
cares? What does Beckham care? It's
18:13
kind of funny. I don't want him in the movie
18:15
anyways. It's like Beckham like do your own thing. I
18:18
get it. Yeah, let her have her
18:20
show and do your own. Let her have a moment.
18:22
And I respect the decision. I respect the
18:24
decision. No Nepo there. 2024
18:28
World Happiness Report for the first time since the
18:30
report was released 12 years ago. The United States
18:32
didn't crack the top 10 happiest countries. We came
18:34
in at 23. I
18:36
believe that. Everyone's fucking miserable here. Yeah,
18:39
everyone's like all fucked up and goes
18:41
to therapy and is all fucking sad.
18:44
Here's the list. Finland. I buy it.
18:46
Denmark, buy it. Iceland, buy it. Sweden,
18:49
buy it. Israel, do not buy it.
18:52
Netherlands, buy it. At number five? Yeah, that
18:54
seems like maybe this was taken before all
18:56
hell broke loose there. Luxembourg, buy
18:58
it. Switzerland, buy it. Australia, buy
19:00
it. New Zealand, buy it. Costa
19:02
Rica, buy it. Kuwait, winning the
19:05
guest at Austria, buy it. Canada,
19:07
no. Belgium, yes. Ireland, Chet.
19:09
What? Chet's
19:12
name? Canada is definitely up there. I would
19:15
buy Canada. Is that Chet?
19:18
What is that? Chet's? Czechia.
19:20
What is Chet's? Czechia. One
19:24
of the happiest countries in the world. Interesting. Lithuania
19:26
and the United Kingdom. Do you think Canada belongs
19:28
up? I tell you, everyone's miserable in Canada. Aren't
19:30
half of Canada is trying to leave Canada, Josh?
19:33
Why would people be miserable in Canada? Isn't
19:36
part of Canada trying to defect from Canada?
19:38
But didn't work, though. You mean Quebec? Quebec,
19:41
yeah. You're talking about Quebec? Yeah,
19:43
I think that whole resurgence
19:45
happens every once in a while. But,
19:48
no, people are happy. Let me get the fuck out of here.
19:52
I mean, I don't know. I think that's pretty
19:54
happy. I
19:56
think it's definitely happier than, definitely happier than...
20:00
than the United States, but I don't
20:02
think it's going in the right –
20:04
I will say there's more
20:07
division in Canada than I think I've
20:09
ever seen before being a Canadian.
20:11
So it's not going in the
20:14
right direction. I think Finland won like four years in
20:16
the world. Finland's always happy. Yeah, no,
20:18
Finland's always happy. Yeah, they just know what's up over there.
20:20
I feel like they might be – Tons
20:22
of blondes that are rolling around keeping everybody
20:24
happy. That might be what – Sweden. Sweden
20:27
both. They might be a little too happy though. Like annoyingly
20:29
happy. We've done that three times. Miley
20:32
Cyrus named Disney Legend. No
20:37
shit. Duh. File
20:39
that into Duh. Yeah,
20:41
obviously. Oh, I didn't even
20:43
know that Disney Legends were a thing though.
20:45
Jamie Lee Curtis and Angela Bassen. These
20:49
are Disney Legends? Kelly Ripon Harrison Ford. Kelly,
20:51
where's the last name? Harrison Ford? Harrison's definitely
20:53
a Disney Legend. Kelly Ripon? Who the fuck? Kelly
20:56
Ripon? Is that the
20:58
blonde girl that has that daytime show?
21:00
Yeah. Why is she a Disney Legend? Oh.
21:04
ABC. Kelly and – it used to
21:06
be Regis and Kelly. Regis and Kelly, yeah. Yeah,
21:11
yeah. This headline again, Bryce Hall versus
21:13
Taylor. Holder, bare knuckle fight. Bryce
21:15
Hall says, bare knuckle FC. We'll be in touch
21:17
with Taylor Holders to have a fight between the
21:19
two. Okay.
21:22
I will not talk about that until they're in
21:24
the ring. Because I don't think
21:26
it's ever happening. Yeah, fair enough. Iza
21:30
Gonzalez says she's lost roles because of her
21:32
looks. Iza Gonzalez, she's been told she's too
21:34
pretty, too hot for so many projects. She
21:37
says it's disappointing. Overly
21:40
sexualized idea of a Latin woman
21:42
that her white friends weren't experiencing.
21:44
Well, you can be too hot
21:46
for roles. Yeah.
21:48
Yeah. I mean, that's like – I feel
21:50
like that's not a bad problem to have. No,
21:53
it's better than being too ugly for pretty
21:55
roles. But just like ugly people
21:57
aren't going to play a role that maybe
21:59
– And like the wolf of
22:01
Wall Street, you're not having Melissa McCarthy
22:03
be the lead, you know? Yeah,
22:05
like if you're trying to be like the girl
22:08
next door kind of like comes into character and
22:10
like, but if you're just walking around like Eliza
22:13
Gonzalez, you're just like obviously the
22:15
hottest girl in the world. Right.
22:19
So you're not going to be the dorky loser
22:21
and stuff like that. So yeah, that's the way
22:23
the cookie crumbles. Boo hoo, you're too hot. Yeah,
22:25
I don't know. You should cry about this one.
22:29
Uh, Boeing executive set to
22:31
resign. And
22:33
this is after what, the movie
22:35
about it or something? The whistleblower
22:37
that mysteriously. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yep.
22:41
XQC buys new clothes instead of doing
22:43
laundry. I don't really know who XQC
22:45
is, the streamer, but I don't. Okay.
22:49
He is a big streamer. Yeah, that's fine. I don't
22:51
care any. Yeah. At
22:54
least he's donating the other clothes. Yeah. He's
22:56
donating the clothes he doesn't buy. So he's donating his
22:59
dirty clothes? Well,
23:01
I'm sure they get washed. Everyone donates there.
23:03
But if he washes it, why not keep
23:05
it? And why do you have to buy
23:07
new ones? I'm saying I'm sure the lawn,
23:09
like the place that takes the clothes washes
23:11
the clothes. Typically. Kai
23:14
Sannet involved in a live police chase. Kai Sannet was
23:16
watching a live police chase when Leslie turned out to
23:18
be one of his fans. The alleged man involved in
23:20
the car chase, one Instagram live says, watching Kai's stream.
23:22
Kai yelled at the man at the blow over. This
23:25
seems like a stop. He's steamed
23:27
and maybe it's not, but I, these
23:29
streamers are just, can you
23:32
top this? Can you top this? Can you top
23:34
this? So it's tough to believe. This
23:36
is like the most, I feel like streamers are taking
23:38
over. I haven't like heard about streamers and now all
23:40
I see and hear of is like sketch
23:42
and Kai and the guy that's always with
23:45
sketch. They're kind of crushing. Jinxy.
23:47
Yes. I
23:49
thought this, I thought this police
23:52
chase thing happened like a long, long time ago. Do
23:56
we know if this is like really old news? That
23:59
would be on our. Our crack staff is
24:02
fact checking right now. That
24:04
would be a real shame if we're talking about something
24:06
old. And on top
24:08
of that I'm pretty sure from what
24:11
I saw it seemed like he was like, oh
24:13
pull over, do this, do that. Like Kai was
24:15
saying stuff. Oh that's not that bad. Okay, okay.
24:17
Not that bad. Are we sure? I swear I
24:19
saw this months ago. Maybe they do it a
24:21
lot. Maybe it
24:23
was a different thing. Alex Cooper
24:26
for Skims. Alex Cooper is the face
24:28
of Kim Kardashian's Skims wedding shop. Yeah,
24:32
you don't like that. Obviously. No. Hate it. Hate Kim
24:34
Kardashian. He
24:36
looks great though. Hate
24:39
it. Is
24:42
Dave going to Alex's wedding? No.
24:44
Wasn't. What?
24:47
You're not? No. I
24:49
did. Let me see here. Is
24:53
it a small wedding? Uh-oh.
25:00
I texted her February 24th. It's bullshit I
25:02
didn't get invited to your wedding. Good for
25:05
you. What did she say? And what did
25:07
she say? She said Dave,
25:09
three crying emoji faces. It's just family,
25:11
a couple friends. It's very small. How
25:13
are you doing post breakup? Your dog
25:15
is very cute. I
25:18
wouldn't have gone anyways. I
25:20
like to say no. You like to be invited.
25:22
I like to be invited so I can be
25:24
like, no thanks, I'm busy. Would you go to
25:27
me and Josh's wedding if we had one? Depends
25:29
where it is, but probably. Like
25:31
if Josh is, your girlfriend's from
25:34
where Josh? Brazil? Yeah. Not going to
25:36
Brazil. So write that in your notes.
25:39
If you want Dave to attend, you can't do it in Brazil. You
25:43
don't like destination weddings? Not
25:45
Brazil, no. Not particularly. What
25:48
if it was a different destination? How far is the
25:50
plane ride? It's Brazil. Oh, you are
25:52
not up for that plane ride, trust me. It's going to
25:54
be like 12, 16 hours. Yeah, so
25:56
you do what you want. You tell Gabby if we're
25:58
getting married and we want to. want Dave
26:00
there like only half hours from Miami
26:02
still still okay it's still in Miami
26:05
oh I'd fly to Brazil Josh thank
26:08
you thank you Dan
26:11
Bazzarian figured out he likes monogamy after years
26:13
of his sex with multiple women's aid Dan
26:15
Bazzarian reveals he's realized it's actually better be
26:17
with one woman who enjoys spending time with
26:20
having a mental connection with Wow I
26:22
don't think that's like that crazy of a
26:24
statement if you find the one right yeah
26:27
no funny
26:30
that he thinks it's like
26:32
this big aha moment yeah
26:35
right alpha male boot
26:37
camp goes viral and alpha male boot camp in
26:39
California called the modern-day night project on viral if
26:41
a video released one of the instructors yelling at
26:44
the men in class according to their website
26:46
the course runs from Tuesday Friday cause 18
26:48
grand is this real let's see wait this
26:50
is not even like they're not even in
26:53
the military or anything there's being alphas yeah yeah
26:55
yeah to the clip just alpha man I feel like
26:58
this could be fake I
27:25
think there's fake him he's not even
27:27
that scary like he's in the wall
27:29
of access to life you
27:32
just like that for so much yeah I
27:34
thought it like he didn't feel like he really
27:36
even believed what you know what are you getting
27:38
out of this if you're got like you just
27:40
get walked on for a week yeah you're gonna
27:42
be like I went to alpha camp fake I
27:44
think there's fake you have to be a real
27:46
mark what that so this
27:48
is their website it's actually real no
27:51
that doesn't mean it's real I believe everything
27:53
I see on the I
27:55
think it's real a bunch of solar classes
27:57
yeah I think it's fake it Oh
28:00
my god, I would die to see you
28:02
two go to the Alpha camp. I think it's fake
28:04
as fuck. Do you think
28:06
you guys could survive the Alpha camp? No,
28:09
not if that's real. But
28:13
Dave, I say we go do it and we get
28:15
miked up and we go undercover. Please, please. Oh
28:18
my god, it's in California. That's
28:21
also very strange, the way it's
28:23
like everything's sold out, but there's
28:25
17 spots left on the
28:28
hand when that hasn't happened yet. Well,
28:31
two spots for you guys. But
28:34
look, dude, it's helped other men
28:36
flip the switch. That might be what
28:38
we need. I'm
28:41
not getting to eat right, guys. I'm
28:44
not going on a cold tub. I'm not pretending
28:46
I'm a marine. You have to be
28:48
a Walmart subscriber to use self-checkout. That's
28:51
fucked. Why
28:54
would they do that? What? Also,
28:57
what benefits do I get from subscribing
28:59
to Walmart? Do you guys have shows? Do
29:01
you have originals? I think you get free
29:04
shipping. Yeah, maybe. It's 13 bucks
29:06
a month. Gosh. Damn.
29:10
You have to be going to Walmart enough where you
29:12
need self-checkout where that would make sense for
29:14
your budget. You
29:17
got to be saving money. What we're doing here on
29:20
the Austin program
29:23
is fake headlines. New
29:26
movie about the devil earned $666,666 on the first day
29:28
of release. No
29:33
it didn't. Yeah, that's
29:35
a fake headline right there. It's
29:37
the fakest headline ever. No
29:39
more fake headlines, please. Austin, make a note.
29:43
Like. Noted. Let's
29:45
not talk about fake headlines. Noted.
29:47
Thank you. All
29:49
right, guys. Quick commercial break. It's
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golf. It's not golf. It's top golf. They
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have all the stuff to make them legit golf, like
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30:16
through Wednesday when you book it in their app and
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all you have to do is book a Monday through
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Wednesday in their app and they'll give you half off
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the golf. So of course even though they have some
30:24
rules, Half Off Golf Monday through Wednesday applies to gameplay
30:26
only. It isn't offered at the Vegas venue. It is
30:28
only available when you book in their app but make
30:30
sure to check out Topgolf. It's so fun. I spent
30:32
so many nights going to Topgolf with my friends in
30:34
college. It's the best. So for full
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details, book a bay, download the Topgolf
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app or visit topgolf.com forward slash BFF.
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That's topgolf.com/BFF. Just make sure to check
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it out and go have some fun.
30:46
Terry, yummy. Is dating Landon Barco? She's in the
30:48
new video. Is that where we're supposed to believe
30:50
Landon Barco released a new music video over you?
30:53
I was going to say they're dating Dave. Well,
30:55
the last week we said they were. Landon
30:58
Barco released a new music video over you
31:00
and Terry Yummy is playing character people think
31:02
is meant to be Charlie DeMalo. Landon and
31:04
Terry also shut down dating rumors and drawbacks.
31:06
Okay, so they're not dating. There you're happy,
31:08
Bri. Yeah,
31:10
you never said DeMalo instead of D'Mayo.
31:12
You're happy there's no love? What'd
31:15
you say Josh? I said you're happy there's no
31:17
love. Well, yeah, I didn't think, I don't think
31:19
they should be together. Why?
31:23
I don't know. I just not. It doesn't seem like a
31:25
fit in my head. I feel like Tara needs a
31:27
Tara. Sorry. Tara needs like
31:29
an outgoing loud dude or
31:32
something to match her
31:34
energy. Euphoria season three is in jeopardy.
31:36
Delayed film once again because the creator
31:38
show Sam Levinson's alleged not done the
31:40
script. There's room to be set sometime
31:42
in the future. The actors will likely
31:44
not be playing high schoolers. The in
31:46
demand actors are on the show, are
31:48
allowed to pursue other opportunities in the
31:50
meantime. That's fine.
31:52
The show crumbled anyways. It
31:54
did. I turned into like a
31:56
musical. People are gonna shit on me for
31:58
saying that but it lost. touch I think. The
32:03
quiet on set Nickelodeon documentary. You guys were
32:06
talking a little bit this before. I
32:08
haven't watched this but I guess it's really
32:11
a hard watch. Dark side of
32:13
kids TV. Yeah, it's really really sad.
32:16
And Drake Bell. Specifically like the
32:18
Dan Schneider Nickelodeon. Yeah. Did
32:21
you watch it Josh? I
32:23
haven't watched it. I've
32:25
obviously seen clips and like watched you know segments
32:27
that have been kind of cut down and put
32:29
out on social but no I
32:32
haven't turned it on yet. I mean
32:34
there was like two actual pedophiles on
32:36
set working with the children that like
32:38
got arrested for being
32:41
pedophiles and like sending
32:43
children like pictures
32:45
and then Drake Bell got
32:48
assaulted. It's really creepy. A lot
32:50
of scary stories. Scary. So I
32:52
say if you have a child never let them be a child actor.
32:55
Were we back in the mix on this? Was
32:57
something Josh Peck said during our? It
32:59
wasn't. I mean it wasn't. It was just the way
33:01
that he talked about Drake because he didn't say anything
33:03
publicly after Drake came out with this. So people were
33:06
like you didn't support him and then our clips went
33:08
re-viral of him basically being like we were friends. We
33:10
were never close. I don't
33:12
think that's fair to nobody knew
33:14
about Drake being assaulted.
33:16
So I think it's not
33:19
fair to joke Josh Peck about it. Even Drake said
33:21
don't attack him. Yeah I was
33:23
gonna say Drake did post something and was like
33:25
hey lay off Josh Peck. He's like called me
33:27
and like we've talked and he's been someone that
33:29
has like been a ear for me
33:31
to like kind of you know talk to and what not.
33:33
So yeah I think
33:35
it's such a crazy situation.
33:38
It's crazy to throw. Yeah something that serious
33:40
shouldn't be like public opinion thing. Caitlin
33:45
Clark women's tournament and NCAA tournament updates. I mean
33:47
I follow this closely. I like the women's game
33:49
almost more than the men's this year because of
33:52
all the stars in it. They'll
33:54
be going to Albany if
33:57
Iowa plays LSU in the
33:59
elite. I will be there. So
34:01
I'm closely watching that. Oh, yeah We
34:05
could probably get once this term is done. I think
34:07
Caitlin would probably come on BFS. I
34:09
know I think she's cool Yeah, I'm
34:11
gonna try to get her to ball One
34:14
is that shows to sing revival in Iowa? What
34:19
you know how that remember me and Josh
34:21
I'm saying revival up Zach show You're
34:24
trying to try to get her to sing it. She's
34:26
gonna I already talked to her. Oh you talked to
34:28
Caitlin Clark More we've I've DMed
34:30
her started talking to her last year you did.
34:34
Yeah, I Love
34:36
Caitlin Clark. I was putting the she was brought up
34:38
in a meeting that brings a huge Caitlin Clark. I'm
34:40
a Caitlin Clark fucking Stan She's
34:43
sick. I Don't remember
34:45
you being in in the weeds with me when
34:47
I was very heavily in the weeds with our
34:49
last year when she'd like I don't remember that
34:52
either. I was getting attacked by the entire country.
34:54
Why I was I remember talking about that
34:57
on BFS Interesting.
34:59
I don't remember that and I told
35:01
her to come on. Let
35:03
me see. Let me check my dams with her. Oh Okay,
35:06
check the dams. I damned her last
35:08
year. I'm not lying Who do you close in between the
35:10
two of you with her? Well, you guys do you guys?
35:13
Yeah, we do. Yeah. No, we damn too.
35:15
We do. Yeah last year Okay,
35:18
people suck you don't do you? Mm-hmm. I got
35:21
You probably predate me, but that was last year.
35:23
No. No, I get it. You're
35:26
awesome So what I was saying Dave, maybe you've got
35:28
closer in the shorter period of time. I Just
35:32
I just hit her with good luck sounds like a custody
35:34
battle Did
35:38
you ask her come on BFS I haven't
35:40
yet no I Guess
35:42
just a race to who can ask her
35:44
first then. Yeah, I guess so rebel Wilson
35:46
versus a shebaron Cohen So,
35:49
what is this? She's rebel Wilson was coming out
35:52
with a book and Sasha Cohen tried to block
35:54
it So Rebel
35:58
Wilson. I've been oh wait working with a
36:00
massive asshole and she will talk about in
36:03
an upcoming book Rebel Rising. She later revealed
36:05
that that mega asshole is Sasha Barakoan and
36:07
that he hired a crisis PR manager's lawyers
36:09
to threaten her to stop writing about him.
36:11
Sasha's team said the claims are false and
36:13
there's no evidence to prove it. 2014 Rebel
36:16
has said Sasha won't do the naked scene
36:19
in the Brothers Grinsby movie when she denied
36:21
by a hot and when she denied he
36:23
hired a body double. Rebel said that Sasha
36:25
also wanted her to stick his finger up
36:27
his butt during the scene as a funny
36:30
bit. Sasha
36:32
is um Borat yeah? Yeah
36:34
Ali G Borat all the same
36:36
guy. Well this is
36:38
this is crazy. So funny. Well
36:41
it might be a creep. Well well
36:43
to clarify where
36:46
did she say he was a creep? He
36:48
was making a comedy movie and asked them
36:51
to shove a finger up a butt kind of a part of
36:53
the movie. I
36:55
don't know that's weird. Didn't
36:58
she say someone else? Is she the
37:00
one who was like nevermind.
37:06
What? What? What were
37:08
you getting to say? I feel
37:10
like this is the second time. Yeah she
37:12
did something like that's court. Rebel Wilson said
37:16
somebody tried to like make fun of her but
37:18
I stick a finger up the butt. This is
37:20
bull butt offense. By the way
37:23
I'm pretty sure that's what I thought. What is this? Rebel
37:26
Wilson ordered to repay millions in
37:28
defamation case? She
37:32
wanted defamation case and I had to pay most of
37:34
it back. Why?
37:36
Meteos over articles that
37:38
she portrayed her as a serial liar. They
37:43
want to peel and went from 4.1 million to 600 grand. I don't
37:45
know we're getting
37:49
into an area where we
37:51
don't know. Yeah we're talking out
37:53
of our ass. Talking out
37:57
of our ass because of the finger.
38:00
last thing. Damn.
38:02
Well. Diddy. Anyways,
38:11
move on. Let's get out of this one.
38:14
Other crazy shit. Diddy's house was raided by
38:16
Homeland Security. This
38:18
is crazy. And now,
38:20
did he like fled the country or some shit? Yeah.
38:23
I saw that too. What's
38:25
going on? Diddy, early today, Homeland
38:27
Security, New York executed a law
38:29
enforcement action as part of an
38:32
ongoing investigation of existence with HJI
38:34
LA, HSI Miami,
38:36
and our local law enforcement partners would
38:38
provide further information. His home was raided.
38:40
After Diddy's home was raided, he was
38:42
seen pacing around in the Miami airport.
38:44
Diddy's private jet has allegedly landed in
38:46
Antigua, although it's clear, uncle did he's
38:48
there. It was
38:51
raided for possible sex
38:53
trafficking investigation. Crazy. What
38:56
is going on? Yeah,
38:58
so crazy. Insane. Also,
39:00
how did he get that heads up? That's what
39:02
I want to know. How did he get the
39:05
heads up that he was about to get raided?
39:07
Because you think it's a coincidence. You just happened
39:09
to be flying up the country because I doubt
39:11
it. Yeah. I mean, yeah, someone definitely tips him.
39:14
Corruption, man. Crazy. Drake,
39:19
J Cole and Kendrick Lamar have a beef
39:21
for the last decade. Drake and Kendrick Mars
39:24
suddenly been thrown distance at one another. This
39:26
came to a head after Kendrick threw direct
39:28
shots of Drake and J Cole on his
39:30
verse on song like that with Metro Boomin
39:32
and Future, Metro and Drake also have beef.
39:36
If you guys want to talk about great, I
39:38
don't really know anything about this and I don't
39:40
really care. Josh, you like rap. Do you know
39:42
about this? I'm not going to rap or rap
39:44
or rap or it
39:46
is a little bit of a rap
39:49
for everyone's like choosing sides. People are
39:51
unfollowing Drake. Rick Ross, his son, followed
39:53
Drake. I think it's pretty crazy. I
39:55
think this is an album move.
39:58
That's what I think, right? It's like Oh, we're all
40:00
gonna be successful like now this album is like
40:03
becoming the most talked about album number one, right?
40:05
So Metro Boomin and all them like just smart
40:07
move for them Not that the album wouldn't have
40:09
done well But you know this just helps it
40:11
and then Drake and J Cole can now do
40:14
a collab album Come out with
40:16
that and kind of diss them back and
40:18
then everyone's just getting crazy album sales that's
40:20
my My idea because Metro
40:22
Boomin and Drake have worked together a bunch
40:24
like Metro Boomin has made millions of dollars
40:26
Probably I don't even know how you say
40:29
that guy's name like with a straight face
40:31
Metro Boomin. That's his like rap name It's
40:33
like he's a producer. He's a producer. He's
40:35
not a rat troll. He you know Boom,
40:39
he's making the beats and everything Metro
40:41
Boomin so it kind of makes sense for
40:43
that right like but yeah I just think
40:45
I just think when you look at it I
40:48
think there's got to be I think there's a
40:51
little bit of some like hey Let's like have some
40:53
fun with this rap beef. I don't know though. I'm not
40:55
you know on the inside You
40:57
know I just wanted to drink J Cole album who would you
41:00
go away? It's gonna be fun to watch I mean,
41:02
I'm I'm I would be on Drake and
41:04
J Cole side personally You know got a
41:06
represent sick. That's the way but also I
41:09
think it's just I think it's just
41:12
gonna be fun to watch Cuz we're just gonna get
41:14
great music out of it, so I'm happy either
41:16
way all right. Thanks for the win for the
41:18
rap community Yeah Yeah BFF
41:20
corner I Don't
41:23
know how much you go I the Brooke omen
41:25
I feel like I flushed her down the toilet
41:27
like the trash she is Yeah,
41:30
she's a racer profile she posts a video
41:33
big oh, I'll go I'll talk to Dave
41:35
I'll talk to Dave delete like the coward
41:37
she is I made a response video
41:39
being like alright. You want to do it Let's do it She
41:42
played the tough gal routine for about three
41:45
seconds. She's like hey I'll come in Wednesday
41:47
on this date and sit down with you
41:49
face to face Like let's fucking
41:51
do it you idiot you won't do
41:54
it then she bailed It
41:58
was like this is so I'm being
42:00
harassed. I'm a normal person like listen
42:02
you psycho No one even know who
42:04
the fuck you were if you didn't
42:06
keep posting I know and you're sad
42:08
you're being harassed when you go on
42:10
someone's hate page on reddit You
42:14
fucking dumb not to mention she
42:16
thinks we're dumb like people all
42:19
Screenshoted her post she literally has
42:21
a post out there that says
42:23
hey I was posting
42:25
on Zach's snark page, but it
42:27
was dead over there this so I came on
42:30
over here to liven things up like
42:32
she's a little attention-seeking piece of
42:34
shit and Then
42:36
she's she doesn't know me very well like
42:38
you if you hit someone with a feather I'll try
42:40
to knock your teeth out with a wrench metaphorically
42:43
speaking So
42:46
she's just like oh poor me what was
42:48
me it's like no one is sympathy for
42:50
you Just keep your mouth shut none of
42:52
this would have happened And then they're always
42:54
we're gonna sue you Dave like for what
42:56
you fucking clown so she's gone, right? Is
42:58
she erased herself now? Yeah, she went private
43:00
deleted her reddit, and then she stopped responding
43:03
to us Bruma out
43:05
like the trash. She was never gonna get in
43:07
the ring you coward of course. Oh, I'll do
43:09
it I there's nothing I knew more in the
43:11
history of the world than this Person
43:15
would never sit and I wouldn't either if I
43:17
was her we have all her idiotic and by
43:19
the way I'm sure
43:21
you see the dirt that was sent
43:23
to us about her from her friend
43:26
from her friends There's enough to stack
43:28
a mile high so yeah, no shit
43:30
She went private deleted everything and ran
43:32
away like the coward she has good
43:35
riddance this Get
43:37
off the table hopefully never have to mention that
43:40
piece of work's name again. This
43:42
was funny. This was really funny Jersey
43:44
Jerry who's been working us now for years?
43:48
Dia Sent Brianna a
43:50
DM. Hey Brianna. This is Jerry. I
43:52
work it. I work with
43:54
you at Barstool And I've
43:57
been asked to contact you from I don't even know
43:59
there and you just reply agree Jerry I know
44:01
who you are. It would be bananas not
44:03
snow. But like I've sat
44:05
down and had conversations with Jerry in
44:07
the office before. That's why I was like Jerry
44:09
I know who you are. Yeah and
44:12
that's Jerry being honest. I know. He's
44:14
a humble king. Jerry
44:18
from. This is like in high school
44:20
when someone's like yeah it's like they
44:23
think you're like pop more popular than them so they
44:25
have to go. Yeah it's Josh from high school. Like
44:27
Jerry I know who you are. Very
44:31
very very funny. Did
44:34
you know that you can get
44:36
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lowest price guaranteed. I
45:35
did see this. I
45:37
did see a cat came back at me.
45:39
Yeah because I said I was smashing cats.
45:42
This is funny. You said you were
45:44
smashing cats? Yeah. This is two different
45:46
videos I think then. What? No.
45:48
Time out. Time out. What
45:51
are you doing? Making fun of cat people. Not literally
45:53
smal- What do you think I'm a fucking like
45:56
animal abuser? I think if you have cats
45:58
you're crazy. You're bashing
46:00
not smashing you guys don't let that
46:02
go out into the fucking hair like
46:05
Dave smashes like No, I
46:09
Was so I don't know no no
46:11
no nothing I so many terms you
46:14
should have said bashing that's smashing
46:16
whatever we're saying Sexual
46:19
that's like a sexual innuendo to
46:21
it that you like cats Guys
46:25
awesome. Yeah, this cats not bad
46:31
I don't hate you. I like cat.
46:33
Yeah, I like cats. Okay that
46:36
that's the exception that proves the rule
46:38
I Hear
46:40
me out tick-tock. I saw this too good This
46:45
was girls freaking out over me. So I'll take
46:47
it well, so would be like
46:49
you're gross I Don't
46:59
know why that song is hilarious Yeah,
47:02
he knows I'll take it. Usually it's
47:04
like he's gross. I'll take that Josh
47:08
went on Jake Shane's podcast Therapos.
47:11
Yep. Talk to us broken arm. There's read the
47:13
room help give advice to the pussies many cometers
47:15
thought Jake was flirting with Josh during The episode
47:17
why is he gay? Yes, he's
47:19
gay. Yes. Was he flirting with you? I think
47:22
we're just like Friendly, I
47:24
don't think yeah, I don't think he was flirting maybe
47:26
a little bit We have a very that's
47:28
just like how Jake and he goes by the name
47:30
of Joshua Richards and he is
47:32
so hot So
47:35
I wasn't there for this I was there it
47:37
was an honor to sit next to him. He
47:39
is hot He is funny and he is unfortunately
47:41
taken, but we get into that a little bit.
47:43
Yeah, that's not flirting No,
47:45
no, you're just compliment actively hot
47:51
RIP Jonathan crunch. Oh, okay. How he's pulling that
47:53
guy. He's been dead for a while that
47:55
but I thought yeah Yeah,
47:57
but it just became like a local
48:00
publication actually ran a story on it
48:02
so went viral again. Yeah. Oh,
48:05
I didn't see this. Dogs Up
48:07
for Adoption named after BFFs, Waldo's Rescue
48:09
Pen, a nonprofit dog rescue organization in
48:11
New York, named dogs that are up
48:13
for adoption after Barstool, Ploys, in honor
48:16
of Dave and Miss Peaches. So
48:18
we got a Brianna Chicken Fry, Josh
48:20
Richards, a Grace O'Malley, Tom Smokes, Miss
48:22
Peaches, and a Dave Portnoy. I
48:24
have liked pretty much everyone from Barstool. It's adorable
48:26
and a really good way to get people to
48:28
go look at Adopt- Good niggas. Josh
48:32
Richards is so fucking cute. Now I'm gonna have
48:34
to adopt it. That's what I was just looking at.
48:36
I'm like, I might have to go adopt the dog
48:38
Josh Richards. I know. They're
48:42
all so cute. So cute. Yeah.
48:45
Oh. But yeah, it's in New York. So if you
48:47
guys want to adopt a dog in New York, go
48:50
check out Waldo's Rescue Pen. Oh.
48:52
They're all so cute. So so cute.
48:55
That's the only one that people are pointing out
48:57
that this is Barstool. That's
49:01
hilarious. That's
49:03
hilarious. What
49:07
did Kate say about
49:09
that? I think she-
49:12
Barstool Nate. That's funny.
49:14
Look at Barstool Nate. Yeah.
49:17
That's a terrible mix too. Barstool
49:19
Nate should have been Barstool Kate. Yeah. But
49:22
I kind of like crazy looking dogs like that. It's
49:26
probably a fun and cute little rat dog. Yeah.
49:29
Um, I guess we can read comments
49:31
before we end this one. I have
49:33
suntan lotion getting into my eye. Oh.
49:35
I wish you're using protection. Yeah. You
49:39
like the new Miss Peaches app by the way? It's
49:41
actually sick. So we're still doing
49:44
every cent that Miss Peaches gets, we
49:47
donate to charities. She's up to like, she's
49:49
raised close to 500 grand now. Wow. Go
49:52
Miss Peaches. Yep. Closing
49:54
on 900,000 Instagram followers. We gotta get to that
49:56
Millie. Get to that Millie baby. Yep. Dave
50:00
would be the best dad. His loyalty is unreal
50:03
to the ones he loves. Children's are missing out.
50:05
Oh, it all goes Miss Peaches. I
50:07
guess you are, Dad. Miss Peaches is like you're good
50:09
now. I
50:12
made a Reddit account just to defend Bree and immediately got
50:14
banned from this page. I didn't know
50:16
that was a thing. When you enter a Snark page
50:18
and you disagree with them or say something positive,
50:20
you get banned because that's the rules of
50:22
the Reddit page, which is just a crazy
50:24
thing. Crazy. Yeah. Can
50:28
Josh get any more stunning? Geez. I
50:30
mean, thanks Anthony. Thanks Anthony. You
50:33
can always try for... That was actually my
50:35
roommate upstairs. He
50:39
call me Shat. I
50:41
don't feel as poor anymore now. What's
50:44
okay? I know. I
50:46
know. Me and Dave got the same laptop. Yeah,
50:48
I'm old school with a laptop. And every time
50:50
I show my headphones, people are like, why you
50:52
got the wired headphones? Yet there's articles all over
50:55
the internet that cool kids wear wired headphones. I
50:57
like wired headphones. Me too. Hey
50:59
Drake, Drake wears wired headphones, Dave. The other ones
51:01
fall out of my ears. Me too. And they're
51:03
just not as good. You lose them. Yeah, you
51:06
lose them too much. Imagine
51:11
an apology from Josh Richard's wet. Wet,
51:13
wet, wet, wet, wet. I
51:15
don't get it. I'm confused by this. That was in reference to the
51:17
apology to Brooke. That wasn't really an apology. Oh.
51:23
So if I said sorry,
51:25
this woman would then squirt? Seems that way.
51:28
Seems like, yeah. Although it seems
51:30
like you're getting a lot of guys. That could be a guy. Yeah,
51:32
that's... Oh, Gib-Gib-Gib. Gib-Gib.
51:36
Gib-Gib. Gib-O. Good.
51:39
Good. I'd take a chicken fry over
51:41
an almond any day. Yeah, chicken fries are way better
51:43
than almonds. Okay.
51:49
I don't have a voice in my head. I
51:51
still have thoughts. They just aren't in the form
51:53
of an inner voice. They're just in my head.
51:56
The first time I heard people had a voice in their head, I
51:59
thought people were messing with me. This
52:03
is where I can't wrap my head around
52:05
it. Like how do you have thoughts
52:07
that don't have a voice? Like a lot of people
52:09
were just saying it was visuals. That was the people that said
52:11
they don't have a voice in their head is they see things
52:13
rather than hear words. Okay.
52:17
That confuses me.
52:24
Who's taking the videos, Gate?
52:26
I see a lot of
52:28
people continually speaking of Ains,
52:30
Peaches, just came strolling over.
52:33
Hey, Miss Peaches. So
52:36
are you going to ignore that question, Dave? I've
52:38
already said there's a million different
52:40
people taking the videos. I have
52:43
Daniella, my assistant.
52:46
I have my Carmen, my
52:48
housekeeper. I have
52:51
Austin taking videos occasionally. Have your
52:53
housekeeper taking videos. If
52:55
I got to make content. Wow. He
52:58
doesn't give up. Hey,
53:00
Miss Peaches is needed by the world. Give
53:02
Austin a raise, dude. Dude
53:04
just knows Dave inside and out and keeps him on track.
53:07
Whatever. I'm not
53:09
choosing the comments. You also aren't. Not
53:12
true. Dave
53:14
was definitely bullied in high school. False.
53:19
Were you bullying or you just a nice guy? I
53:22
was not getting bullied and I'm not a
53:24
bully. I don't bully people. Like
53:27
if you're going to say I'm bullying Brooke Almond,
53:29
I'm not. Brooke Almond was trying to bully someone
53:31
else and then she got stuffed in a locker
53:34
and put an atomic wedgie in its fur fall.
53:36
Yeah, that's true. Yeah, you bully the bullies.
53:39
Yes. You're a bully-bullier. Dave,
53:41
aging like milk, is bad.
53:43
By the way, by the way. It's
53:47
not good, man. It's not good. I'm
53:49
pretty fucking old. But
53:52
also if they looked at pictures of you younger, I
53:54
don't think they would say that. You're aging,
53:57
you look better now than you used to
53:59
look in fame. I think they meant to write fine.
54:02
I think they meant to write fine. They're confused
54:04
on Yelp, dawg. There's an asterisk that
54:06
says fine wine on Yelp. Yeah, it's a
54:08
hurdle, actually. Asshole.
54:12
How are they going to tease us telling us about Josh
54:14
spilling the tea about Charlene Landon like that? Yeah,
54:17
I'd want to know too, but you can't because we'll get
54:19
some. I would too. Yeah,
54:22
we'll go to President Michaela. If
54:25
Dave wasn't a part of this, nobody would watch. Sucks
54:27
to be you guys. Damn. What are we, Josh?
54:30
Nothing? Fucking
54:33
A. Dave and Bri are quite literally
54:35
my favorite people. Sorry, Josh. Still getting to know you, oh
54:37
well. They're my favorite. They're
54:40
my favorite. Is this your
54:42
first episode on the pod? Well, all
54:44
the other one just told Josh how sexy he was. True. True,
54:48
true that. But is this her first episode that
54:50
she watched or something? Like
54:53
how does she know? She just, she just,
54:55
she just watched like planned Bri and missed
54:57
Peaches videos. The only
54:59
thing Dave cares about and used to measure
55:01
life is looks. Meanwhile, it looks like a
55:03
parrot. That's mean on all levels, but wildly
55:05
untrue. When
55:07
have I ever said I, the only thing I care about is looks.
55:11
Maybe they just say that because you always talk about your list,
55:13
but you're just getting your list out there so that people
55:15
know what you think. That doesn't mean look at Emily Radzachowski.
55:17
Perfect example. I said she's hot and I don't like her.
55:19
So I don't know what we're talking about. Okay,
55:22
closed. All
55:24
right, guys, back from our friends at Visible. Dreading
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rate would service on the visible plan for
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see visible comm make sure to switch now
56:07
at visible comm let's get back to the show
56:10
Yeah, maybe sad to see all the mean comments. I love
56:12
this show. I laugh so hard every episode there.
56:14
We go. Thanks crazy peeps Shout
56:19
of crazy peeps I would pay it to see
56:21
a video of Dave Reviewing
56:23
and reacting to salt burn this is the guy
56:25
when he's not a bad idea. Yeah drinks to
56:27
come Yo, that would be that
56:29
would be a pretty funny live stream though I
56:32
would like to watch you watch that be pretty
56:34
good BFF Livestream thing of
56:36
just having to have Dave sit through salt
56:38
burn with us. I haven't seen it either
56:41
So it also be my first time. Oh
56:43
we should Can't
56:47
tell if I look at Dave as an a-list
56:49
love your C list I think
56:51
it's both a compliment is there be less
56:53
is a compliment for sure. I
56:55
take C I don't
56:57
care. I mean if someone said hey day your
56:59
C list. I beg all right fine. We saw
57:01
my celeb Yes, he is not
57:03
f No Josh
57:07
has shiny luscious lips. They look
57:09
in full. Haha Okay
57:12
Let's get it Dave
57:15
needs to wear more greens as has make his eyes
57:17
pop I've green eyes and tell me what green people
57:19
say the sweetest things about my eyes We
57:22
just green eyes if I
57:24
have underwater Fiji bungalow blue
57:26
eyes to be honest blue
57:31
There's a green hat those
57:33
eyes popping Dave
57:36
and Austin's relationship like Michael Scott Toby's relation
57:38
from the office. No, I don't hate us
57:40
at all Michael
57:42
Scott hates Toby. I don't hate Dave Well,
57:46
it's this adorable
57:50
He's such a cornball, how did y'all
57:52
let these people get famous okay? I'm
57:55
sure he's referring to me That
57:58
was referring to a comment about you yeah About
58:01
who Josh? Well, he has luscious
58:04
lips. Yeah, these
58:06
my lips are luscious. I'm not a mother. I
58:11
love Dave and talk about him any chance I
58:13
can solve fight your haters for you Dave including
58:15
Austin. Not a hater. Damn.
58:18
I yeah, I can handle myself but thank you. That
58:21
was nice.
58:23
Responding to the comments and eating the rude ones
58:25
shows why y'all are solid. Thanks
58:29
Scott Mac. Oh,
58:33
did you do something with your lips? Why is
58:35
everyone talking about your lips? Oh
58:38
my god, I'd really chapped lips
58:40
like really, really chapped lips on
58:43
the verge of almost bleeding at any
58:45
moment and I just slathered
58:47
them with Vaseline before the podcast. So it
58:50
kind of looked like I had
58:52
almost like lip line
58:54
or something on my lips. Yeah, yeah,
58:56
yeah. That does sound like what a
58:58
guy who got lip fillers would say
59:01
though. No, but
59:03
now my now it's if you look there everyone
59:05
will be like oh they're back to like cut
59:08
it. You're just chapped up. You gotta look it's
59:10
very different. Yeah, there's not it's not like it
59:12
was bruising lip fillers like crazy dude. Dave
59:15
isn't scary. It's just New England blunt those of us
59:17
from the Northeast are that way. I could see that.
59:20
Yeah. I'm not
59:22
trying to be scary. The
59:25
only people that like him are the people he signs their
59:27
check. That's not true. That's
59:29
just not true. They've
59:32
had friends. Breeze
59:34
very witty seemingly always surprises me. Thank
59:36
you Spencer, Laura. That was kind of
59:38
though a backhanded like yeah, like I
59:40
thought she was like, tell me you
59:42
thought you were dumb. Spencer thought you
59:44
were an idiot Breeze. That's all right.
59:48
Dave reads the headlines like he's Judge Judy.
59:51
Yeah, kind of your role. Dave's
59:54
voice is actually soothing for me. Okay,
59:56
thank you. I
1:00:01
don't know. I don't know how people hate on E3 like that
1:00:04
because genuinely if I can meet anyone It would
1:00:06
be you guys just never forget. There's people out
1:00:08
there that genuinely fucking love you guys and that
1:00:10
includes me. Oh very sweet
1:00:14
One to end on all right that wraps it
1:00:16
up that wrap that wrap it up
1:00:19
We'll see you guys next time present. Bye
1:00:21
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1:01:17
April 7th 2024 participating McDonald's must opt
1:01:19
into rewards
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