“I need you.” That’s a scary thing to say to someone, especially when it’s true. For many of us humans in modern, western civilization — realizing that we need to intimately involve other people in our imperfect, un-photoshopped lives is a frig

I miss blogs.

May 23rd, 2019 5m 58s

Gather round my digital friends, I’m going to tell you about a time , a beautiful and innocent time, when the internet made people happy. Long, long ago, before large corporations started buying up parts of the internet, and before sites like

You Can’t Be Nice to a Narcissist

May 6th, 2019 13m 40s

My name is Dave, and I consider myself a narcissist. I love attention, I constantly overestimate myself, and my favorite topic of conversation is me. Chances are you know people like me, because there are a lot of us — yet almost no one knows h

Back in the Saddle: 2018 Annual Review

Jan 2nd, 2019 7m 1s

I took a break this year. For those of you who have been following this site, you’ll notice that sometime around the end of June I took a break from publishing every week. It wasn’t totally intentional, but it felt right. Up until that point I

Tell the Truth

Sep 21st, 2018 9m 53s

Write something true. That’s my mantra. When I’m feeling blocked I pause and remind myself of this. Write the truth. Not the ultimate truth — just something that feels true, something authentic. That’s what writing is for me, a chance to admit

Before You Read ‘The Way of the Superior Man’ Read This

Aug 1st, 2018 18m 54s

I just wanted to shake his hand. Here was a man I learned so much from, that answered so many of my questions about “being a man”, and I just wanted to meet him and say “your book meant a lot to me” — but there were rules. It was 2011, and I wa

The Surprising Foundation of Every Great Relationship

Jul 7th, 2018 7m 36s

I’m a systems thinker, which means I spend a lot of time trying to understand the root of a problem, rather than dealing with it’s symptoms. When we attempt to solve problems without first understanding the system that created them, it’s like b

The Day Life Coaches Replaced Best Friends

Jun 20th, 2018 9m 22s

It’s the year 2030, and in the western world, turning to a coach for life’s challenges is as common as 1-hour drone delivery from Amazon. It’s easy, it solves our problem and we don’t mind paying a little extra for the convenience. In fact, in

To My Overachieving Friends, Whom I Love Dearly [Poem]

Jun 13th, 2018 2m 26s

When all the websites have been built, When all the funding has been sought. When all the companies have been sold, When all the Teslas have been bought. When all the charities have been started, When all the employees have been hired. When all

Art Isn’t Dead, We Are

Jun 6th, 2018 11m 31s

I’ve come to know what I call the “millennial applause” and it’s creepy as hell. Aside from being a snarky blogger on the internet, I play music 3-4 nights a week at local bars and clubs and I’ve been doing it since college. Since my job is to

What It Means To “Leave Someone Better Than You Found Them”

Jun 1st, 2018 7m 40s

Leave the campsite better than you found it. That’s the “campsite” rule, coined by Dan Savage and practiced by responsible lovers everywhere. It’s a pledge to leave people in as good a state (physically and emotionally) as you found them. As so

Everyone Believes in God

May 17th, 2018 8m 23s

Last year I watched the moon pass in front of the sun, and the moment when the sky went dark, I became speechless. Like many people who came to watch the solar eclipse, I thought I knew what was going to happen. Pretty simple, right? The moon p

You Don’t Have Time for Art [Poem]

May 2nd, 2018 2m 13s

You don’t have time for art, But art has time for you. She’s like a friend who’s down For whatever you want to do. Art is not a contest There are no judges to be had, And all your feelings are welcome Be them happy, angry or sad. Your job is no

Loving All The Parts

Apr 26th, 2018 4m 18s

I’m a walking contradiction. On one hand I believe in self-expression and sharing your opinions, even when they make other people uncomfortable. That’s what Boodaism is all about. On the other hand, my heart breaks when something I say makes so

Why Nerds Are Happier

Apr 21st, 2018 8m 37s

Here’s a statement everyone would agree with — the more time you spend with people that bring you joy, the more joyful your life will be. And yet — I meet people all the time who feel undernourished and frustrated with this area of their life.

The Difference Between Having Needs & Being Needy

Apr 13th, 2018 9m 20s

I am completely repulsed by needy behavior in relationships. I’m the kind of person that needs a lot of space — and when I say “space”, I don’t mean once in a while we go out with friends, I mean a default setting of autonomy, with frequent and

2018 Ultra-Light Travel Guide: My Gear & Mindset

Apr 4th, 2018 10m 51s

“Life is simple, but we insist on making it complicated.” ~ Confucious When I think about the way I travel, I’m not surprised at how simple my set up is, I’m surprised as how complicated it is for everyone else. In many ways, minimalism has ma

The Reason It’s So Hard To Find Happy Relationships on Dating Apps

Mar 28th, 2018 7m 46s

I have a question for you. If you could start a relationship with the hottest man or woman in your city, would you? Let’s say you live in New York and you’re a straight man and you were able to meet the collectively agreed upon most attractive

The Problem with Liberalism (From a Liberal Perspective)

Mar 22nd, 2018 9m 49s

I’m a liberal — at least that’s what people call me. Truth be told I don’t like labels or political identities, I think the democratic party is fundamentally flawed and I’m socially progressive and fiscally conservative. But for the purposes of

17 Creative Ways To Be Lonely

Mar 15th, 2018 7m 34s

Being alone is easy, but being lonely takes effort. We’re social animals, which means we like to be in groups. Yes, even that person who loves posting introvert porn on Facebook still has friends and enjoys gatherings of like-minded people from

How Modern Marriage Is Making Us Lonely

Mar 8th, 2018 8m 47s

Have you ever tried bailing out a boat you didn’t know was leaking? You see some water in the bottom of the boat, and you think “hey, I’ll get this water out”, so you grab a bucket and start bailing. Then you notice the water starts to fill up

You’re Not Trying To Debate, You’re Just Being a Dick

Feb 28th, 2018 4m 4s

A true sign of intelligence isn’t how well you can explain your perspective, it’s how well you can articulate the perspective that opposes yours. I don’t care how well you can articulate your argument, show me how the other person is also parti

Stop Looking for “The One” and Do This Instead

Feb 22nd, 2018 9m 41s

The other day I got to witness a “classic” conversation among women. It’s a conversation that’s been going on in different forms for hundreds of years. A few married women were counseling their single friend about how she could meet “the one”.

State Change vs Transformation

Feb 7th, 2018 3m 5s

So often people come out of retreats, weekends or experiences and proudly declare “I’m transformed” — but I don’t believe them. It’s not that I don’t believe in transformation, I do — but we (especially spiritual people) love to mix up state ch

The President America Needs, Not the One It Wants

Jan 31st, 2018 9m 8s

No one likes throwing up. That feeling you have just before you vomit is one of life’s most unpleasant sensations, yet we all know how good it feels afterward. However awful the experience of purging was, we know that on some level it needed to