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Vinyl Sneak Peek

Vinyl Sneak Peek

Released Wednesday, 22nd May 2024
Good episode? Give it some love!
Vinyl Sneak Peek

Vinyl Sneak Peek

Vinyl Sneak Peek

Vinyl Sneak Peek

Wednesday, 22nd May 2024
Good episode? Give it some love!
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Episode Transcript

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0:04

Sometimes I say I'm going to talk about something exciting

0:06

and it's just not. I've pretty much lied to our

0:09

listeners, but I think this is exciting. Recently

0:13

we celebrated our five-year anniversary

0:16

of doing the podcast by releasing

0:18

a vinyl album. It's

0:21

so cool. And it has

0:23

really cool artwork and it

0:25

was fun to make. And it's

0:27

called Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend,

0:29

Quinquennial Celebration Vinyl. And the

0:32

reason I'm bringing this up is we released it not

0:34

that long ago and it

0:36

immediately sold out. And so

0:38

we've decided to make a

0:40

second pressing. It's a

0:43

limited edition vinyl album and

0:45

it's of course presented curated by myself, Sona

0:47

and Matt in celebration of

0:49

our podcast fifth anniversary. We curated it.

0:51

Yeah. And this one,

0:54

the vinyl is orange. This

0:56

is a limited edition orange. So

0:59

let's just say you, I'm going to

1:01

flash forward like 15, 20 years, maybe 50 years.

1:06

And the listener right now has one

1:08

of these and goes in and

1:11

says, hey, I've got this Conan O'Brien

1:13

Needs a Friend fifth

1:16

celebration vinyl. And the old

1:18

guy, maybe it's one of those shows like antique

1:21

road show or whatever, Pawn

1:23

Stars. And they say, oh

1:25

yeah, that album, yeah, that was quite a podcast back

1:27

in the day. One of the big ones. And I

1:29

was like, yeah, yeah. So anyway, I've got that. And

1:31

so I am guessing you just got the old regular

1:33

vinyl, black vinyl. Well,

1:35

actually no, sir. My

1:39

grandfather bought this because he

1:41

was a Conan fan. I've since listened.

1:43

I'm not a fan. I don't get it.

1:45

But anyway, it's this and he

1:47

pulls out and the guy's going

1:49

to go, this is

1:52

orange. You got an

1:54

orange one. You

1:56

got an orange Quinn

1:58

Quinnio. start shouting

2:00

alarms will go off. We got

2:03

an orange quinquennial, a

2:05

Conan orange quinquennial. And

2:08

he's gonna say like, do you have any idea

2:10

what this is worth? Well actually I really don't.

2:12

I'm just you know it's not important to

2:14

me. I don't value material things. 500 million

2:16

dollars! No way! Yes! In this scenario in

2:19

my mind it's 500 million dollars. But of

2:21

course this is about 80 years

2:23

in the future. Where that's like a month's

2:26

rent. I see.

2:28

Also this is the largest printing we've done

2:30

and it's the second so the first printing

2:32

was less. Yeah you were shooting on the

2:34

black one. But the black one is

2:37

more valuable because there was only a

2:39

limited quantity. This one's a special color.

2:41

Let me try it again. Yeah. You

2:43

probably got that crappy orange one. No

2:45

no no no. No? That's too far? Don't

2:48

shoot on the orange. Yeah we still need

2:50

to. Okay how about this? How about this?

2:52

Well if you got the orange one that's

2:55

gonna be worth a lot. Yeah.

2:57

Okay good. But if you got

2:59

the initial black pressing well that'd

3:01

be worth even more! Is that

3:04

right? Yeah. But also in this scenario originally

3:07

you said oh 15 years in the

3:09

future. I'm adding more time. I want it to be 80. I want

3:11

it to be more like 100. Okay.

3:13

Like post-apocalyptic? Yeah.

3:15

Okay. You're gonna go oh oh here come the

3:19

Robotron! Get out of here! Put on

3:21

your exosuit! No! Humans

3:30

detected. Humans detected. Is that

3:32

an orange Conan O'Brien vinyl?

3:34

Or the more

3:36

slightly more precious black. I

3:40

will return this to the head of

3:42

the Robotron. A

3:45

long time collector of

3:47

vinyl. So

3:49

yeah it's the future. Well we have a little

3:51

treat here today though just the taste. This is

3:53

a taste because boy you must be thirsting for

3:56

some Conan stupidity right now. This

3:59

is a taste of know, because we don't play the

4:01

vinyl, because then you could record it yourself and you wouldn't

4:03

need us and we couldn't exploit you. So

4:09

here's a taste of an old

4:11

timey ad we recorded exclusively for

4:13

the vinyl, never heard before by

4:15

non vinyl owners. And you can

4:17

get your vinyl at podswag.com/Conan. Yeah,

4:20

podswag.com slash Conan.

4:22

Give a listen. Ready?

4:30

You're free of that 1917

4:33

flu that's going around? If

4:37

so, you want Doc

4:39

Palmer's asbestos face mask.

4:42

Asbestos, the new miracle cloth that's

4:45

been proven to destroy all

4:48

infectious vapors. Yes, of course,

4:50

many people say that asbestos

4:52

has not been tested for

4:54

long term health effects, but

4:56

take it from old Doc

4:58

Palmer. Asbestos is the best

5:00

cloth to have wrapped around your

5:02

mouth. Available at

5:04

a five and dime in

5:07

your instanti-tea just jump on

5:09

the old large wheeled bicycle,

5:12

wax up your stash, and

5:14

get down to Doc Palmer's. Hi, Doc

5:16

Palmer. Oh, hello there. What you wish?

5:19

It's Johnny Youngblood here, just wondering

5:21

if you're Doc Palmer face mask

5:23

for safe for kids. Of course,

5:25

they're safe. There's nothing safe for

5:27

the put around your mouth than

5:29

asbestos. Thanks, Doc Palmer.

5:34

That cloth is probably not related

5:36

to the mask. Everyone

5:39

in this era is sickly. Get

5:41

one now, one for a dime,

5:43

two for three pennies.

5:45

It doesn't make sense, but

5:47

that's the way things were at the

5:50

end of the First World War. Wait

5:53

a minute, how do I know there's

5:55

going to be two? That's strange. Well,

5:57

so it goes. Toodly

5:59

doodly. You've

6:02

called Conan on your

6:04

computerizing machine. The machine

6:06

would be invented in about 80 years. Until

6:09

then, try it on an abacus,

6:11

you motherfucker! When

6:32

you need mealtime inspiration, it's worth

6:34

shopping Kroger, where you'll find

6:36

over 30,000 No

6:41

matter what tasty choice you make, you'll enjoy

6:43

our everyday low prices. Plus, extra ways to

6:45

save, like digital coupons worth over $600 each

6:47

week. You can

6:49

also save up to $1 off per gallon at

6:51

the pump with fuel points. More

6:53

savings and more inspiring flavors. Empathy

7:29

is our best policy.

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