0:00

🎵acoustic guitar music🎵 Classic.

0:17

Welcome

0:18

back to the Corridor Digital Podcast, episode 175!

0:24

Wow, very exciting. We're glad you're here

0:26

everybody. I've got some very special people

0:28

with us today. We've got Griffin Thorne,

0:31

the mystery man himself who keeps getting more

0:33

tattoos. Which one will we get next? I've

0:36

got Jordan Allen. Yeah.

0:40

This guy. This guy, dude.

0:42

And of course, the lovely Jordan Coleman,

0:45

everybody. Hi everyone.

0:47

Don't clap. Don't clap for that. Damn.

0:50

What's up CorridorCast? It's Christian,

0:52

your tech here, and I'm just popping in to tell you

0:55

a little bit more about Spotify for podcasters.

0:57

Have

0:57

you ever wanted to make a podcast? Well Spotify's

1:00

got a platform that lets you make one super easily,

1:02

then distribute it everywhere, and even earn money.

1:05

All in one place. It's called Spotify for

1:07

Podcasters, and it's pretty simple. Spotify

1:10

for Podcasters lets you record and edit podcasts

1:12

right from your phone or computer, no matter what your

1:14

setup is like, whether you have professional mics, or

1:16

you just want to use the desktop mic, or even

1:18

your mic on your headphones, you can start creating

1:21

today.

1:22

Then you can distribute your podcast to Spotify, as

1:24

well as everywhere else podcasts are heard. On

1:27

Spotify, video podcasts are available in case you

1:29

have cameras and you want to do that whole thing. With

1:31

Spotify for Podcasters, you can earn money in a variety

1:33

of ways, including ads and podcast subscriptions.

1:36

The best part of all of this, it's totally free

1:38

with no cash. We've been using Spotify

1:40

for Podcasters for a long time now.

1:43

They've been great support and

1:45

software for the channel, and we

1:47

highly recommend giving it a try. So if you would like

1:50

to get started, download Spotify for

1:52

Podcasters, the app, or go to Spotify.com

1:54

slash podcasters to get started. Happy

1:57

creating. Hope you guys have fun with that, and

1:59

let's get back to the. episode. It's

2:02

already strong. It's already going strong.

2:06

All right, so Griffin, but for real though, I've noticed

2:08

you've been getting more and more tattoos. Yeah.

2:11

Yeah. Where's this coming

2:13

from?

2:14

I got my first tattoo

2:17

in 2019 and I definitely

2:19

caught the bug. You're

2:21

in the bug phase right now? I'm in the bug

2:24

phase. I'm just trying to strike

2:26

the balance between getting

2:29

the bodysuit, probably maybe

2:31

before I'm 40, but also not just filling

2:33

my body up with stuff

2:35

for the sake of doing it. Wow. Bodysuit

2:38

means down to ankles up to neck? Yeah, probably.

2:41

I'll probably stop at the neck or like... Collar bone.

2:43

I'm so sorry. I'm just genuinely

2:46

curious in a bodysuit. Do you spend money on the cheeks?

2:48

The butt cheeks? Yeah. It

2:50

would look weird if you did. Oh yeah. Oh

2:53

my gosh. It's so expensive. Two white butt

2:55

cheeks and then a bunch of... Griffin, you know what

2:57

you should do? You

3:00

should do a fake whitey-tidy

3:02

lines around your butt

3:04

and waist. That's a good

3:06

idea. That's genius. What

3:09

is that sunblock? You know, the little girl. Yeah. Pants

3:12

being pulled off. That'll just be the gun to me.

3:15

I probably will skip

3:18

the neck. I'll

3:20

definitely skip the stomach for at least as long

3:22

as I can because that's horrendous. I'm

3:24

actually quite

3:27

afraid of needles. I

3:29

don't know if I can do anything on

3:32

the jugular. That sounds so

3:34

scary. Well natural

3:36

next question is you take

3:38

it to the dark side of the moon from the cheeks to the front.

3:41

That is off limits too, I'm sure. No

3:44

comment. Honestly, that's an interesting

3:47

question. I don't know.

3:50

I'm sure somebody has had their tattoo. Someone

3:53

has and it may or may not have

3:55

been in the shape of a dragon, which

3:57

was interesting.

4:00

I'm just like you're talking for personal experience.

4:02

Yeah, I've regretted it instantly And

4:08

people are getting it pierced people are gonna tattoo just

4:10

oh yeah for sure for sure Yeah,

4:13

somebody's out there. I don't guys I've done

4:16

Yeah, I've none that is that is one thing

4:18

that I swore to my dear mother

4:20

I would never do and never get a tattoo. I thought

4:23

about getting a slave though at one point

4:25

I'll either do a sleeve or nothing

4:27

Okay, yeah, I've been I've had

4:30

that same thought I've all

4:32

I've had so many nightmares about tattoos It's absolutely

4:34

insane nightmares where I go through the process

4:37

of I get the tattoo and then I get it lasered

4:39

off In the within the same dream. Oh,

4:41

and then I wake up

4:43

check myself. I'm like, whoo What do you think that means

4:45

that mean? Yeah, that's interesting I

4:47

think I've always went back and forth on if I wanted a tattoo

4:50

and then I have the dream and I'm like I guess

4:52

I don't oh Okay,

4:54

it's quite literal then, huh? I guess I

4:58

try to be very practical. Yeah, I dig it. Yeah

5:02

Are you sure you're not having commitment issues?

5:04

Oh

5:06

Well, yeah, I get that's exactly

5:08

what it is with tattoos that is

5:10

a commitment but does it mean

5:12

you know what I mean Nah,

5:18

I like committing to things that I can

5:20

get you can get rid of a lot of things like a house Even

5:23

a boyfriend or a husband you can get rid of all

5:25

of them

5:26

It's

5:28

true it's like a lot of

5:31

work and like legality sometimes

5:33

getting rid of a tattoo is arguably more work

5:35

It hurts is that it's painful. It's

5:38

multiple sessions

5:40

Just say I'm done. I mean the mother thing Griffin

5:43

Do you have that because you said you don't want to just put anything

5:45

on your body has to mean something

5:47

For me that was always the biggest limitation is I

5:50

don't I'm trying to think of something that would

5:52

Be valuable or mean so much to me

5:54

for the entire duration of my life

5:57

And that's the hard part is here's

5:59

my advice for that that

6:01

this is only my personal perspective,

6:03

but the reason why I went so

6:05

long without getting any tattoos was for that same

6:08

reason. And then at some point I realized

6:10

that my values and the things that are important

6:12

to me change over the course of my life. And

6:15

nothing, like very few things will actually

6:17

remain that meaningful to me.

6:20

And so it's more important

6:22

to me to just get

6:23

things that like, my first tattoo was just something

6:26

that,

6:27

it was a wizard and I've just always

6:29

like dug wizards. And I was like, I'm probably not

6:31

gonna hate wizards in 10 years. And

6:34

so like most of my tattoos, like

6:36

the snake wrapped around the knife on

6:38

my chest is like

6:40

not super meaningful. I just thought it would look bad-ass

6:43

and it does. So I got it. And some

6:45

of them have some meaning to them, but like,

6:47

yeah, I've found

6:50

like not getting too precious with them is

6:53

just as important as not being like too flippant.

6:57

That's like- It's kind of a tap, it's a tapestry,

6:59

you

7:00

know? It tells a story over time. That's

7:03

at least how I justified my worst tattoo. Which

7:06

or worst one? Well, it's not

7:08

that it's like a bad idea. It's

7:11

just, I got a G

7:13

clef

7:14

and a base clef on my arm. And

7:17

just the, it was my first one and the guy who

7:19

did it, you know, I just went to one of those,

7:21

un-researched, just walked in, was

7:24

like, Hey, I want a tattoo, you know?

7:26

It's like the fantastic Sam's of tattoos.

7:29

You've done it in 15 minutes.

7:31

Super cut. It cost 50 bucks, 30

7:33

minutes or less. Those are the three guarantees.

7:37

And I was like, well, you know what? At least whenever

7:39

I look at it, it'll be a reminder of that time

7:42

in my life.

7:42

That's what it was for me. So

7:46

I decided to get better ones after that, after

7:50

having made that mistake. But

7:52

yeah, only up from

7:54

there.

7:55

Cause you have a beautiful full sleeve.

7:58

Thank you. Yeah, that was done by a guy named John.

7:59

Josh Palmer, he's up in

8:03

Lodi Stockton area. He's,

8:05

yeah, he's great. I actually met him in Minnesota

8:07

when I was living there, but then

8:10

we were both there for like exigent

8:13

circumstances. And then we ended up both

8:15

back in California. So I

8:17

would go up there and see him back in my motorcycle

8:20

days. I would take my bike up there. It was a nice

8:22

ride, but yeah, I had the bug

8:24

for a while. I think it's all out of my system

8:26

now, with the exception of maybe a cord or perspective

8:29

logo. That seems

8:31

worth doing. Yeah.

8:33

For me it is. Yeah, for

8:35

me it is, I think. It's just been such a part of my life

8:38

that it makes sense.

8:41

When I was in high school, like how you

8:43

guys talk about changing, I went through a time

8:45

where I was super into Jesus, like

8:47

very religious, so I was Christian. And

8:50

then right after that, I became atheist.

8:53

Oh, and then I became like spiritual

8:55

after that. And so I've always been in the spiritual lane.

8:58

But when I was like 16 and into

9:00

Jesus, I like had begging my mom to get

9:02

this Bible quote.

9:04

And like she said no, and I was like in tears.

9:06

And I was like, you hate me, typical teenage stuff. Yeah,

9:09

classic. You're the worst mom ever. I

9:11

hate you. And then a year later, like I didn't

9:14

even claim the man. So could you imagine

9:16

if I had that tattooed on my body? And

9:19

it's like, well, no wonder that, that's what parents are there for. They're

9:21

like, bro, you have so much growing up and learning to

9:23

you. You still want to get that quote, and you

9:25

can get it when you're 18, 19, whatever.

9:26

Is that the cutoff? Is that 18? Is

9:29

that when you're allowed to? Well, go make a decision

9:31

on your own. Oh, yeah. Without

9:34

consent, without parental consent, yeah.

9:37

Unless you go to a really, unless you go to a

9:39

like a sleaze ball or like a shady shop, which

9:42

if you find a tattoo artist who's willing to

9:44

tattoo you underage, you probably don't want to

9:46

get tattooed in that shop anyway. That's very valid.

9:48

Yeah. It's not really something to mess

9:50

around with, to be honest. Well,

9:53

it's interesting because Jake, you got the full sleeve

9:55

all at once, right? Or

9:57

did you? Was it in pieces? The first one.

9:59

session necessarily, but first one I got,

10:02

I was only like 20.

10:04

And then I got one like a year after that, and then I didn't

10:06

get one for a couple of years. And

10:08

then I got a proverb and then

10:10

and then I got the sleeve. But

10:13

you got like the sleeve done at once. It's

10:15

one cohesive design. No,

10:17

actually, I got the eagle and

10:19

then

10:21

and then I got the

10:23

lions and then I got the sword

10:25

with the crest on it. So you were

10:28

like kind of spotty with it and then kept

10:30

filling it in rather than like gradually coming

10:32

down. Well, when when

10:34

I met Josh, we started talking about doing

10:37

a full sleeve. And so the idea kind

10:39

of arose over the

10:41

course of a few years. And it was like the

10:44

first thing I wanted to do is get

10:46

I wanted to get an eagle because in my family

10:48

crest, there's a griffin and a griffin, as

10:51

you might know, griffin is made up of an eagle

10:53

and a lion.

10:54

And it's two of those things combined.

10:56

So then I had the griffin. I have the griffin up

10:58

here and he wraps around my shoulder.

11:01

And then I said, OK, well, let's let's do

11:03

an eagle. Let's end griffins down or an

11:05

eagle and lions down here. And that was kind of the

11:07

plan. But

11:09

it happened kind of in pieces. Mm hmm.

11:12

Those

11:13

are kind of some of my favorite tattoos, personally, because

11:15

my roommate,

11:17

he is also building it piece by

11:19

piece. And I kind of love it because every single

11:21

one of them on his arm is a different story, you

11:24

know, and something that that you can inquire about.

11:26

So such a good conversation starter, which is why I'm kind

11:28

of bummed that I

11:29

I may never have them,

11:31

you know, just do that. Do that promise. And

11:33

like, I don't know. They just seem

11:35

like they're so cool. And I wish

11:37

I could also dial back like how intensely

11:39

I'd take them. Yeah. But it's

11:42

a it's an interesting one, though. Like when you're raised

11:44

to not

11:45

have them like as an option, it's weird to

11:47

like even play with the idea of them.

11:49

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, no, it's different for

11:52

everybody for sure. And, you know, you are

11:54

demarking

11:54

your body. And,

11:57

you know, that's according

11:59

to a.

11:59

of religious traditions, that's not

12:02

exactly what you're supposed to do, but then according

12:04

to other religious traditions, that's what you're

12:06

supposed to do. Right, right. If your body's

12:08

a temple, they're the stained glass windows, brother. Yeah.

12:12

Could be. You know what I mean? A little bit of art.

12:14

Say that about the Cadillac tattoo on your thigh. I

12:17

don't know about that one.

12:20

Griffin, you're kind of going for that patchwork

12:23

of ideas look,

12:25

I've noticed.

12:27

Yeah, that's definitely my favorite style

12:29

of coverage, is

12:35

just wall to wall,

12:37

almost like an art gallery. You're

12:39

just covered in individual pieces.

12:41

Yeah. I like that a lot.

12:44

Crazy. So, anyway, Jordan, not

12:47

Coleman, Jordan Allen, sorry. She

12:50

just goes by JC now and I've basically,

12:52

Jordan. We've kind of settled. I want that to

12:54

be known. I don't know, Jordan Coleman,

12:57

if you're okay with this, but we've kind of settled on JC.

12:59

You have it objected, so.

13:01

Yeah, it sounds cool too. Like everyone's into it and then

13:03

I'll just take Jordan and then you can take that. I

13:05

don't know, man. Everybody's into it. I do

13:07

like JC, but you go as Jallen.

13:08

Yeah.

13:10

Yeah, I do Jordan and Jallen. Unless

13:12

it's Nick, he calls you Jallen. Jallen,

13:15

and some people who just want to watch the world burn,

13:18

look at her while saying Jordan, but are

13:20

talking to me.

13:21

And that's my favorite.

13:23

That's my favorite moment. Is

13:26

it? I can feel,

13:28

I can cut the tension with a knife. All right, let's

13:30

move on. Big fan, big fan. Jallen.

13:34

Yes. You got married

13:36

and you went on a honeymoon. Dude, I did. We

13:39

have some questions. Yeah, before you

13:41

actually talk about it, I have a question.

13:45

We've been wondering if your wife is

13:47

in fact a real person. If she's real, yeah.

13:50

I'm gonna meet her this weekend. So

13:52

I'm excited. Like it's

13:54

all been building to this. I'm only down

13:56

about 200 grand. I keep sending her money over

13:59

Zell and Venbo.

13:59

And you know, her flight's coming

14:02

in this weekend. And maybe, yeah, I can't

14:04

wait. Jake,

14:06

Jaller already lost his Redding wing once.

14:09

My Redding wing. Redding ring. Redding

14:12

ring. Redding ring. This

14:14

morning. So you're like three days in. No, all

14:17

that matters is I got it on now. Okay.

14:19

And I've actually gotten used to it very

14:21

quickly, but

14:22

yeah, it's crazy. It's crazy being a married man. Sorry,

14:24

boys. I'm off the market. I'm

14:27

off the market. I'm done.

14:29

So, you know, quick story

14:31

about that. I lost my wedding ring. Oh.

14:34

And it was, it was my

14:37

dad's wedding ring.

14:38

It was just the

14:41

ultimate burn. Yeah.

14:44

In the studio, I took it off. It

14:47

was like a Friday. I was about to go

14:49

home.

14:50

I took it off, washed my hands, set

14:52

it on the sink in the, in the, in the poop dungeon

14:55

and, uh, and I left

14:57

the weekend and there was a production

15:00

that of a couple of friends that, that came in

15:02

and they had some extra people there that we didn't

15:04

know and

15:06

someone took it and somebody must've

15:08

taken it because I looked everywhere. I

15:10

went down the drain. No, I

15:12

went, I looked everywhere. Like down

15:14

the drain under the little cabinetry

15:17

in there, like behind the toilet, in

15:19

all the cracks, like everywhere.

15:21

That sucks, man. You would take a

15:24

ring. That's so lame. I

15:26

don't know. But yeah, somebody must have

15:28

because it was just gone. And

15:31

since then, I haven't worn one because I was like,

15:33

that was it. That was the one.

15:35

Is yours tattooed? No.

15:38

I've seen people get the initials tattooed on their finger

15:40

and. Or does the actual band they tattooed

15:42

to now? Oh, really? Yeah, they just tattoo a band. I,

15:45

I like the, the rubber ones. I've

15:47

always, you know, we've been talking about doing that for a little while

15:49

and I know they tear a lot, but I'm just worried

15:51

wearing this around. No, yeah. All

15:54

you got to do is, is if, is if you

15:56

are in a conversation and you're not wearing one

15:58

and somebody like starts talking to you.

15:59

you, you know,

16:01

in that way as if like they're interested

16:04

in you. You just go. That's a daily occurrence

16:08

for me, man. The humility

16:11

is unprecedented. You

16:15

just immediately shift the conversation.

16:18

At least this is what I do. I just immediately shift the conversation

16:20

to my wife and children. That's

16:22

the move 100%. And then it's like, you know.

16:24

Yeah. And then the tone down. They're

16:26

like, oh, married must

16:28

be a nice guy. And they think that's the thing. And

16:31

how true is that? I hear it all the time

16:33

that people are actually more attracted to marriage because

16:35

you know what it is? It's a mark of value.

16:37

Yeah. It's like, oh, this, this

16:40

guy must be a keeper. Yeah. I'm

16:42

going to try and take it. I

16:43

know. I know. It is. I

16:46

rock this. I rock this nonstop in Vegas

16:48

for the bachelor party weekend. Not, not for mine, but

16:50

for a friend of mine. Yeah.

16:51

And I just, I didn't take it off. I like it. I

16:54

really like it. It makes me feel

16:56

more adult than I feel a lot of the time. Well, because that's

16:58

not, I know, I know. So it's really

17:01

just a big issue with your wedding ring and

17:03

like horse blinders on just walking around

17:05

screaming. I love my wife. My

17:07

wife. I love my wife. I have the photo

17:09

up. I'm like, she's come. She's flying in this weekend.

17:12

We're going to meet. She's real. You've

17:14

got the

17:16

hamburger board wrapped over

17:19

your shoulder of like your wife's picture.

17:23

Do not talk to me.

17:25

I am happy. Leave me alone.

17:28

Oh man. But

17:30

yeah, it's, it's, you know, obviously like,

17:33

you know, leading up to the wedding itself, like I never planned

17:35

anything in my life. I

17:37

I'm the guy who will like show up to the thing

17:39

and have a good time. But man, I have so much

17:41

respect for people who plan anything. So planning a wedding

17:43

as like the first cold turkey move

17:46

was way harder than I thought it was going

17:48

to be. And we did a backyard wedding thing. So

17:50

we thought keeping it small and like that, that

17:52

would help

17:53

a lot. But then you got to worry about things like what

17:55

kind of cutlery do you want? I didn't even know

17:57

there's more than one type. Dude, I knew about the

17:59

photo.

17:59

You can work on the spoon and the knife, but there's

18:02

like metals. There's different metals. Salad

18:04

pork. Yeah, what do you use the same thing?

18:06

Shrimp spoon. Shrimp

18:09

sticks? Like what is a shrimp stick? And

18:11

why is it $9 per shrimp stick to

18:13

rent? And then they find out it's wedding

18:16

and they bummed the heck out of the price of everything.

18:18

It's absurd, man. When Wendy and I were looking

18:21

at it, so we got married under kind

18:23

of interesting circumstances. Like we had been

18:25

dating for,

18:27

what was that, like four years?

18:30

And by the time I asked her, and

18:32

we were in Minnesota

18:34

helping take care of my dad because he was

18:36

sick and he passed away at the end

18:38

of it. And it was kind of sad. And

18:41

we looked at the cost and we were like, okay, we have 15,000

18:43

maybe to spend on this.

18:46

And

18:48

that included the ring.

18:50

Oh, wow. Because I hadn't bought the ring

18:52

yet.

18:53

Yeah.

18:54

And so we

18:55

were just like, man, like

18:57

the last thing we wanna do after doing

18:59

nine months of this like life excursion

19:02

is then plan another thing and

19:05

spend like money we don't have

19:07

on

19:08

this thing. And so

19:10

we just got married in our backyard and

19:12

I had my brothers and

19:15

my sister came up with their families. And we

19:18

just did like a nice thing in Orange County,

19:20

like Newport Beach.

19:22

And that was it. And I'm glad we did.

19:24

I mean, my aunt was kind of mad. She

19:26

was like, this would be the perfect thing to

19:29

like

19:29

get the family together, but I just, I couldn't

19:31

do it. Yeah. When

19:34

you go get married. I know. And that's the

19:36

thing. Like you do have to put your foot down with like, you know, what the family

19:38

wants too. And it's such a like a trade off of,

19:41

what do you want versus what do they want? And honestly,

19:43

going in, I

19:44

was, I will equate it to this. I had

19:46

a A5 Wagyu at a place

19:48

called Alexander Steakhouse in Pasadena. I

19:51

did it for Adrian. Adrian is my wife at the

19:53

time we were three years in

19:55

and she'd always wanted to try it. It was, it

19:57

was a, I think it was a hundred

19:59

and. $80 or something for three

20:01

ounces something absurd. I don't remember it was

20:03

absurd, but they're one of like 30 Wagu

20:07

bro, dude, they're one of like 30 odd places

20:10

in either, California or the US I don't remember that

20:12

is certified to serve this grade

20:14

of a 5 wagu from Japan or something They have

20:16

a big plaque on the wall might be BS But I believe

20:19

it and we went in there and I was like there's

20:21

no way this is gonna be worth it But

20:23

we'll fork out the money for the experience and

20:25

then just call it a day and it came out and we

20:27

spent I'm not even lying. We spent over an hour eating

20:29

three ounces of steak because we

20:32

were just in absolute ecstasy I burned

20:34

through all my serotonin and I was physically exhausted

20:36

by the end I was like I can't believe it but it

20:39

was actually worth it And that's how I felt

20:41

about the actual wedding itself not the act of getting

20:43

married but the

20:45

moment and like the family

20:48

being there and like looking up and seeing my my parents

20:50

and you know like those kind of precious

20:52

Moments you you kind of think oh it'll be a blur

20:55

and so expensive and then all

20:57

of that melted away in the moment And I was just a total

20:59

crybaby, and it's like it's weird to have a

21:01

clear-cut best day of your life But

21:04

it's like so easily that that

21:06

yeah, I know it's it's really cool man, so

21:09

I'm buzzing We're just we're goofy

21:11

right now man. We just moved into our new place, and

21:13

we're we're just excited We don't have

21:15

a couch like we're literally sitting eating

21:17

take takeout on a on a twin

21:19

mattress It's our makeshift couch, and

21:21

we're just we're loving every second of it man. It's like

21:23

the best It's definitely I get the the

21:25

idea of like the honeymoon phase It's like everything's

21:28

just exciting and we're digging it man, so

21:30

I love

21:31

that you guys

21:33

Waited and then like live together after

21:35

yeah, you don't see that yeah very

21:37

often anymore. It's interesting It's like in the

21:39

next chapter like I kind of live my life in

21:42

chapter phases And I like that personally

21:44

and I try to soak up as much of the current chapter

21:46

as possible like all the aspects of it So for

21:48

me the idea of roommates and like just

21:50

having your boys and going home I had three

21:52

roommates So I just go home in the four of us would just watch sports

21:55

and hang out and go out and

21:57

and now that that chapter Is closed it's like this is the new

21:59

exciting one, so we're like

21:59

discovering all these things about each other in

22:02

this new phase and man I'm I could

22:04

go on about it forever which is why don't talk about it cuz

22:06

then I just turned goofy and everyone gets awkward

22:10

I love it dude did you really go to Bora

22:12

Bora for your dude I

22:14

look from the beginning I said if we're spending

22:17

anything on the wedding I want to I want to drop

22:19

buckets on the honeymoon I care more about the honeymoon

22:21

than I do about the wedding and I have from the beginning

22:24

because the honeymoon is like you only get that

22:26

once dude like that's the special time

22:28

it's just you two

22:29

yeah it's you two you like get to just

22:32

goof out together and like be together 24-7

22:35

for this period and experience anything

22:37

you want and I asked her I was like what like what are

22:39

you what is your dream honeymoon

22:41

and she's like oh I've always just I don't know if it's doable

22:43

but I always wanted the over water bungalows

22:46

and I was like no joke that is my exact dream

22:48

honeymoon so I was like we have to do it and so

22:51

you know I'm like we do this once this is the only

22:53

real reason where I can feel good

22:55

dropping stupid money and there's

22:58

no other real reason where I could like quantify

23:00

it in my life and so it's like let's just do

23:02

the best and just taste it taste that life for

23:04

just a moment

23:05

and then just know how how good it can be

23:08

and so we went Bora Bora over water bungalow

23:10

at the st. Regis and it was like so far

23:13

into the middle of the Pacific Ocean it's

23:15

crazy it's a speck I'm looking

23:18

at it on a map right now it is

23:20

it's a speck I don't know how

23:22

they found it I see it on Instagram all

23:25

it's like halfway between Australia

23:28

and California yeah yeah

23:30

it's like in between Australia and Mexico it's kind of

23:32

nuts now is it far distance it is

23:34

it was a like an eight-hour night in Mexico

23:36

and Australia

23:38

those walkways really is clear as what like tick-tock

23:40

I'm not Jordan I'm not joking look here's

23:42

anyone on those walkways the best way I can

23:44

describe it is this

23:46

if you die and you go to heaven

23:49

this is the waiting room for heaven it's

23:52

it's it's untouched it's

23:54

like yes there are there are Westerners there and there

23:56

are like a couple resorts there

23:58

but the same region is the biggest one and there's like

24:01

90 villas or whatever, and

24:02

that's the biggest one. So in total, you're looking at maybe

24:05

a thousand Westerners are there, but the

24:07

rest of it is just this insane, untouched

24:10

gem. And looking at the sunset, silhouetting

24:12

the mountains in Bora Bora, it felt like

24:15

a 2D animation. Like at

24:17

any point, it was a miniature or something, stop motion,

24:19

and it felt like you could see hands reaching over the mountains and

24:21

picking things up because it was too perfect.

24:23

And then the stars would come

24:26

out,

24:26

and there's no moon there right now. They have 53 days

24:29

in a row or whatever where there's

24:31

no moon in the sky. And what

24:33

that means is your eyes exposed for the stars,

24:36

and you get to see so much more of the sky,

24:39

and you get to see the dust of the Milky

24:41

Way, and you can even see a black hole. So

24:44

it feels like a different world,

24:47

and it felt like we shouldn't be there. So

24:49

we got pampered up the wazoo. It was absurd.

24:51

It was like the greatest five days. I hope you have

24:53

pictures, because I have to see those. Oh yeah, because I left my

24:55

phone, Jake. I don't know if you know this. I

24:58

got really sick before we left.

25:00

Extremely, like the sickest I've ever been.

25:02

And I was like hot and like kind of

25:05

passing out, but we couldn't change the flights.

25:07

They're so expensive. We couldn't change anything.

25:09

So I'm like in the waiting room at LAX,

25:11

just on my death bed, lying on the floor

25:13

outside the cage, slowly dying. And

25:16

we get called onto our flight, and I'm in such like a zombie

25:19

state that I just get up and walk into the plane.

25:21

And only when I'm there and seated in my seat, I

25:23

go to get my phone, and it's

25:26

not in any of my pockets. And then

25:28

I realized, good Lord, I put it next to me

25:31

in the gate.

25:32

And once you're in the plane, they don't let you off. You're

25:34

done.

25:35

So I'm begging the French

25:37

speaking, because we went Air France or whatever. So the

25:39

French speaking stewardess, and she didn't understand what I was

25:41

talking about, but she basically let me know I can't go off.

25:44

And at the last second before we go, and I'm just, you

25:46

know, when I get back off to do a new phone off, to rebuild

25:48

all of it, it's chaos.

25:50

And I got a call on my Apple watch,

25:52

and it was one of the Air France employees

25:55

who had found it and said, we're gonna put it in storage. And

25:57

they did, thank God. I think it's because it shattered

25:59

on the back. Yeah.

25:59

No one wanted to steal it. It's crushed and bent. Is

26:02

it still the bent one? And I think that's why

26:04

they didn't take it. No one took it because it

26:06

looks like it's destroyed. You can't sell that. It's genius.

26:09

It's the perfect camouflage. So, yeah, anyhow, maybe

26:11

I'll never fix it, you know? They

26:12

should make cracked phone cases

26:14

that just look like they're cracked so no one

26:16

will ever take their phone. It's genius. So

26:18

yeah, Adrian has all the photos of the trip and man, it was

26:21

bonkers. So now we know how good it can

26:23

be. So it's like an old volcano.

26:27

It is, yeah. The whole thing. And

26:30

I guess the island sinks over time.

26:31

And that land. It looks like it's sinking

26:34

because it's like a barrier reef

26:36

where it has the ring reef or the ring island around

26:38

it. And then there's the mountain top in the middle

26:40

and

26:41

it's surrounded by water.

26:43

Yeah. And it sinks and it creates those matus,

26:45

I think they're called, something like that, where it's like the flat land.

26:48

And eventually that whole mountain will be gone.

26:50

And it'll just be the flat land. So I need to

26:52

get there. You need to get there. It's going to be

26:54

gone in three months, dude. Go, go, go. Fuck

26:57

your flight. No, it's

26:59

like a centimeter a year or something. But

27:02

it is kind of crazy. So you have a couple, you only

27:04

have a couple million years left.

27:06

You better book it now because flight

27:08

prices just go up the closer you get now, guys.

27:11

Yeah.

27:11

I will say it's like so much more worth

27:14

it to pay for that, for you guys to have that

27:16

experience because at the end of the day for weddings, you're

27:18

just paying for everyone else to have an experience at your wedding.

27:20

Yeah. So it's like

27:23

if you pay $50 or $5,000, if everyone's there and they love you, they're going

27:25

to enjoy it. Yeah. A $5

27:27

honeymoon compared to however much that was.

27:30

Yeah. This is this was very much like

27:32

the treat of, hey, we plan the

27:34

only thing and the biggest thing that we've ever planned.

27:37

Let's treat ourselves and like unwind and reset. And

27:39

you were there for like a whole week. Yeah. Yeah.

27:42

It was like five nights, six days. It was amazing. Amazing.

27:45

But I'm glad to be back, guys, because I don't know. I always get that creative

27:48

itch whenever I go on vacation. I'm always just like, I want to make

27:50

something. So when we got back, I was just so

27:52

revved and ready to go. And I came in with some hot energy

27:55

on Tuesday. And I needed to

27:57

dial that back a little bit. But yeah,

27:59

I'm just. And now that we're doing the Animorphs thing,

28:02

I'm scared dude This

28:05

is like the perfect. I'm so happy. They

28:07

photo-scan me yesterday. I don't even want to know Yeah,

28:10

it's it's a weird one Griffin has this

28:12

tendency

28:13

to walk by our desks at the

28:15

worst possible time It's

28:17

it's insane how consistent lands it he

28:20

plans it. Yeah, you must plan it Y'all

28:22

are just doing some like really cursed

28:24

stuff All

28:26

the time yeah It's like

28:29

every time it is every time and

28:31

it's yeah, I'm starting to question myself I

28:33

think at a certain point. I can't keep saying

28:35

well his timing is just perfect But

28:39

yeah, it's that idea. I'm

28:41

very excited about me. Can I yeah am I cool to go into

28:43

it a little bit? Yeah, yeah, we're taking the

28:45

animals out of Animorphs

28:50

It's so dumb and like we were all

28:52

sitting you know brainstorming an idea and

28:55

and

28:55

Ren is actually reading

28:58

Animorphs right now and so he

29:00

happened to be he happened to be reading Animorphs

29:02

Yeah and you know the covers

29:04

everybody knows the covers of the transformation to

29:07

the to the animal and How

29:09

cursed those are like the in-between photo

29:12

of like the bug boy who's clearly

29:14

in pain Starfish

29:17

girls starfish girl yes Oh,

29:20

they're like on it. A classic.

29:23

Otter boy like yeah There's there's so

29:25

many good ones And you know we all grew up with them

29:27

like in the either the library

29:29

or the book fair or whatever

29:31

So we all knew about them, and it's like what can we do

29:33

with this because we've always wanted to do something

29:35

with Animorphs And yeah Finally

29:38

came to fruition and we put our heads together and eventually came

29:40

up with the idea we have of taking the animals out of them And

29:42

having the transition be just from me

29:45

to the animal form, but the animal

29:47

part never appears It's just my body being

29:50

crushed into the shape of you

29:52

know an otter or whatever the animal is And

29:54

it just being just a skin tomb essentially

29:57

of this beast that wants to die Everyone's

30:00

favorite part of the Animorphs is the in between and

30:03

so we take it to the very end because you

30:05

can still see the person So now we just strip

30:07

away all the animal and take you to the very end And

30:09

how do you guys choosing what animal goes with which

30:11

person? It's you have to you

30:13

have to feel it Yeah, what I mean spirit animal.

30:15

What is your spirit animal JC?

30:17

It's

30:20

my favorite animal Man,

30:23

I love the ocean just like the vastness you

30:25

can kind of get lost in it Okay, and

30:27

it's peaceful and they live long simple

30:30

lives. They're like, hey, I need to lay

30:32

some eggs

30:34

Crawl up to the sand drop.

30:36

All right guys. Hope you find your way They

30:38

go back and they just chill thing,

30:41

you know, it's like this is they're not really stressing

30:43

and they don't really have like a many many Predators either

30:45

like see actual sea turtles. Yeah,

30:48

not once they're full grown. Yeah So

30:50

do you do you relate to them because you

30:52

feel like you're similar to them? Why do you spirit animal?

30:55

I think because I love the ocean and I

30:57

love being deep into the ocean Like I like feeling

30:59

lost and like I don't I like when it gets so

31:01

cold that your feet can't touch

31:03

and you kind of you're like Oh mother nature

31:06

has more to terrify you Yeah

31:10

And maybe that comes from like me living in Florida and like

31:12

hurricanes and we go out really deep and just

31:14

I love the idea of mother nature taking its course rather

31:16

than like us as humans think that we can

31:19

Have all of this control and like really

31:21

nothing is in our control at the end of the day

31:23

That's why I feel about water Yeah,

31:25

that's how you should feel about water. I think

31:29

Paddling at the shore like there's nothing

31:32

compared to like Just

31:34

diving like in the middle like I'll be out in

31:36

the Pacific Ocean like sea dolphins. I'll just dive

31:38

in with them

31:39

That's cool. Yeah, I I

31:41

don't know. I love it. And you have a big

31:44

portable shell you take You're not telling us about you Slurp

31:47

into it for protection I'm just

31:49

going to hang out with them It's actually some

31:51

weird thing that you're not telling us about

31:55

Griffin what about you? It's yours. Um

31:59

the animal I relate to

31:59

the most you know I

32:04

don't know I don't really like

32:06

a want to give you that and the mission

32:10

that's smart man right there come

32:12

on man you can just

32:14

thought about what spirit animal you are or

32:17

what animal you just like animal

32:21

I mean my favorite animal for like

32:23

my entire life has been sharks I've

32:25

always found sharks to be really cool and really fascinating

32:27

there's

32:28

all the many

32:30

different varieties and

32:32

how ridiculously fine-tuned

32:34

they are to

32:36

do like one specific thing which

32:39

is eat one specific

32:41

kind of animal at an alarming

32:43

rate yeah and survive for

32:45

millions of years yeah not one shark they don't

32:47

live for millions of years but like they've

32:49

been around like

32:51

aren't they like one of the the

32:53

oldest 20 million years or so

32:56

yeah well there's the megalodon

32:58

too right like you know the megalodon

33:01

is a

33:02

god dude you imagine the

33:04

world must have been a terrifying place oh yeah

33:07

dude yeah

33:07

it's there's a megalodon skull

33:10

I think it in New York at the Natural

33:12

History Museum

33:13

and it's bonkers well

33:16

it's probably just the jaws because sharks

33:19

except for their jaws and their teeth do not actually

33:21

have solid bones they have cartilage

33:24

skeletons yeah it's

33:26

probably just the jaw there's a jaw there's

33:28

a jaw like at the San Antonio

33:30

Aquarium there's a jaw replica

33:34

of the size of maybe that's what

33:36

it is and you can stand in

33:38

it almost

33:40

yeah that's pro shops and they

33:43

don't what I think

33:47

it's more like the lions lions it's those

33:49

are bones

33:52

have bones yeah yeah why are

33:54

you saying yeah no I said I said

33:57

it's I think you're thinking of lion oh

33:59

I think I'm lying.

34:02

I don't know what you're talking about. Why is he thinking I'm a liar?

34:04

What do you mean? aquatic aquatic

34:06

life is such Such

34:08

a fascinating thing though like but when I was a little

34:10

kid I

34:11

I wanted to be like my dream

34:14

job was like marine Biologists like

34:16

I wanted to like study sea life

34:18

because

34:19

it's it's crazy Like you like

34:21

learning about like sperm whales and how

34:24

they like did you know that if you're in the water

34:26

near a sperm whale and it decides to like

34:29

Ping you with its sonar full force

34:32

It could kill you because

34:35

of how loud it is What?

34:38

They and they will do it at a lower

34:40

volume because they know you're alive Like

34:42

they're very very very very smart

34:44

and like when they're just checking you out to

34:46

see what you are They'll

34:47

kind of pulse their sonar through

34:49

you to like look at your insides

34:51

and apparently you can start to feel your body

34:53

heating up From the like

34:56

the amount of kinetic energy that is passing a microwave

34:59

Wow, it's it's bananas.

35:02

There's whales are

35:04

like like sperm whales

35:08

Some marine biologists theorize that

35:10

like

35:11

they're they're they're clicking and their calls is

35:13

like

35:14

Potentially a language that is like

35:17

more complex than human

35:19

speech and we just like

35:21

Haven't figured it out because it's not you know

35:23

Relatable to any kind of linguistics that like

35:25

humans have and

35:27

Yeah, that's crazy whales marine marine

35:29

life. It is it is a crazy crazy

35:32

world beluga whales They said

35:34

they're like the canaries of the sea because they

35:36

talk so much. It's just like constant

35:38

I don't want to do whale noises right now,

35:40

but I used

35:43

to have a stuffed beluga whale actually

35:46

Every night. I'm like kind of like you. I really

35:49

like aquatic animals I

35:51

think we're diving in and figuring out what your

35:53

uh, what

35:54

your spirit. Yeah the

35:56

sperm whale Something

36:00

in the scene. It's a mighty and beautiful creature. It

36:02

truly is. Yeah, there's, because correct

36:04

me if I'm wrong, maybe you know this, sharks, they

36:06

can sense

36:08

your, like the electricity in

36:10

your body. They can smell the fear. They,

36:12

yes, because they can sense your fear. Because

36:14

my dad and I, as a birthday gift for him,

36:16

we took a trip to South Africa

36:19

quite a few years ago, and in Cape Town, there's

36:21

tons of great whites. Yeah. And

36:24

we went shark diving in the little cages. That's a

36:26

bucket list item for me. Yeah. And they threw

36:28

a foam seal on the surface. They hadn't had any sightings

36:30

in a few days. So we weren't really holding our

36:33

breath there. But they threw a foam seal just in the

36:35

shape of one.

36:36

And I wasn't scared of the ocean going into this trip.

36:38

And watching the, just the black water, just

36:40

a mouth emerge out of the nothingness

36:43

and bite it clean in half and then disappear

36:45

all fast.

36:46

I had a whole new appreciation for how terrifying,

36:49

especially when they told me, hey, when you get in there, they're

36:51

gonna know you're there and they're gonna know you're scared. And

36:53

if they know you're scared, they know your prey. And if they

36:55

know your prey, they may just wanna take a bite

36:57

out of curiosity. And they don't

36:59

like humans, so they probably won't finish the meal, but

37:02

then you're down alive. And I'm like,

37:05

that's awful. So not only do you have to be in

37:07

the water, you have to be chill. They're just gonna mutilate you.

37:09

Yeah, just out of curiosity. I

37:13

imagine that there is,

37:15

like you see pictures of great whites and

37:17

you're like, oh yeah, that's big. But I imagine seeing

37:19

one in person, like there's no way to prepare

37:22

yourself. They're like 20 feet long. That's

37:25

so crazy. Some of them can be, I think. Let me

37:27

look that up. Yeah, I think 26, because

37:30

this one was a younger one, so it was 13 feet. And

37:33

that alone was humongous. So I

37:35

can't imagine double the size. Females can

37:37

get up to 16 feet.

37:39

Oh, it's up to 16. Wait, really? Oh, how

37:41

big can males get? Wait, wait, wait, okay, the longest one.

37:43

The largest white shark reliably

37:46

measured was 21 feet. 21, okay, 21. So

37:50

yeah, 13, I guess, is, you know, it's

37:52

still big. It felt humongous.

37:54

And how fast it moved. The recent whale carcasses from

37:57

Southern Australia suggest that some

37:59

are as long as.

37:59

is 25 feet. Oh, dang, son.

38:01

That's so crazy.

38:03

The guy who was on the boat had been working there for one season,

38:06

and he says during whatever the seal season

38:08

is, where the seals are moving through,

38:10

he says he saw five get caught in a day

38:12

on the water where they're like jumping out

38:14

and trying to get away, and sharks are just coming out of nowhere,

38:16

just munching them. Like, that must be the craziest

38:19

thing. Twenty feet is the height from

38:21

the floor of our studio to the low part

38:23

of the bow.

38:26

Get out. Of the bow truss.

38:28

Yeah. Forget that, dude. Forget

38:31

that. Why does that exist? Because

38:34

the ocean is vast. It's

38:36

huge. Like, they can be that big

38:38

because there's plenty of room and there's not a bunch of people

38:40

building cities under there. Yet. We're

38:44

coming for you. You know, we're coming for you,

38:46

Great Whites. And like being

38:48

suspended in a liquid,

38:51

you know, allows for like larger bodies

38:54

to develop.

38:55

Yeah. Gravity doesn't have as much

38:57

of an effect on like they don't have like

39:00

sharks don't have knees. Yeah. They don't have

39:02

to have knees to like hold them up. Elephants

39:04

got knees. I don't know if you knew that. I

39:06

didn't. That's actually what I did. Well, I made

39:08

a joke literally today that manatees have

39:11

no bones and they're just bags of meat.

39:14

And so like, obviously I was joking. Thank

39:16

you so much. Obviously I was joking.

39:18

And to hear now in the same day that

39:20

sharks don't have bones

39:22

and they're just bags of meat and cartilage,

39:24

you've shooketh me to my core.

39:27

Dude, they're so like. Let's see if

39:29

manatees have bones. Hold on. Manatees

39:32

have bones.

39:33

I've been looking at manatee bones almost all day.

39:35

Like sharks are so

39:38

like they're like the opposite of manatees, man.

39:41

Like sharks have bones. Yeah. Sharks

39:43

have teeth for skin.

39:44

They were. Are manatees mammals?

39:48

Manatees are manatees. They waddle up on land.

39:50

They need them bones.

39:52

I think they're mammals. Let's see. I don't

39:54

know if they. Well, you can't get a manatee waddle

39:56

up on land. They are mammals. So

39:59

mammals. Yeah, that's that makes sense

40:01

because even their their little fins

40:04

are actually just hands. They got fingers They

40:07

can't use bones in there. Yeah, they've there's

40:09

hand. There's finger bones in there

40:12

I did Google sea turtle because

40:14

we had asked about how old a shark

40:16

is 110 million years God

40:19

I was way off Yeah,

40:22

and they said that they were there wait turtles or sharks

40:25

sea turtles turtles. Yeah, okay 110 110

40:27

Okay for for me the

40:30

ocean like the deeper you get

40:32

the more I love it Like when you start getting to the level

40:34

of where they're translucent and emitting their

40:36

own sources of light the angler fish. Oh

40:39

My gosh when I read that as

40:41

a child in essence. Oh my

40:43

gosh that lived in my dreams for years

40:45

Just the freaking ghouls at the bottom

40:48

James Cameron just got his submarine and

40:50

was like I'm the hell I saw ghouls in person

40:53

Sick have you guys ever seen the algae

40:55

that occurs like once a year It's

40:58

like this like it's like the bioluminescent When

41:00

everyone like boats go through any

41:03

type? Yeah, the waves crash. I just is

41:05

neon blue.

41:06

Oh, it's so cool. It's Beautiful.

41:09

Yeah, it's so cool down there. All right Jordan

41:12

Jordan Allen What say

41:14

you about your about your?

41:17

About your spirit animal.

41:19

Oh about my spirit animal. Yeah

41:22

I'm kind of curious for you to assign me one real

41:24

quick. I have one in my mind, but I'm curious I'm

41:26

curious what what the outside world would

41:28

think You might not like

41:31

mine, but the first thing that comes to mind is

41:33

a prairie dog Prairie

41:35

dog why prairie cuz you

41:37

know like they're they're always happy

41:40

and they're always like oh, that's sweet, isn't it? They're

41:42

always like friendly and wanting to play and like

41:45

good natured. I feel like I get that

41:47

vibe from you Wow That's like

41:49

really really good dogs. Yeah, Daniel gave me

41:51

golden retriever. So that was no no not a dog

41:53

a prairie dog a prairie dog

41:56

Yeah, I don't know the difference. I'm putting it on you like

41:58

specifically a prey No. Not

42:01

dog. Oh,

42:03

it's a rodent! You know. That's

42:06

a rat, Jake. That's not a rat. That's

42:08

not a dog. Go for it. That's not

42:10

a dog. That's a lie. Oh, that's funny.

42:12

It's called a prairie

42:14

dog. It's a rat. It's

42:16

a herbivorous burrowing ground squirrel

42:19

native to the grasslands of North America.

42:21

Is it my teeth? Is that why? It's

42:23

giving meerkat. It's giving beaver. Meerkat.

42:26

Meerkat. That's another name for it. Oh,

42:29

man.

42:30

Yeah. Meerkat. Okay.

42:33

Weird that they put dog in the name. That's a weird choice. Because

42:35

I was thinking of lassie. Yeah,

42:37

I was too. I was like, how lovely. Are

42:40

meerkats the same as a? No.

42:44

Meerkats. No, meerkats are Lion

42:46

King. Okay. That's what I was

42:48

thinking of. Not a prairie dog. I was thinking of a meerkat.

42:51

Oh, okay. Meerkats are cool. They're

42:53

very polar. I feel like meerkats

42:55

are not your energy because if memory serves me

42:57

right, meerkats are incredibly

43:00

homicidal creatures. Apparently,

43:03

they kill each other in huge numbers.

43:06

They're very aggressive.

43:07

Is that true? If

43:10

memory serves me right, I have pretty bad memory, but

43:13

I feel like there's a lot of podcasts

43:16

you listen to that gives you this random information.

43:19

This

43:19

random batch of trivia. I love it. Yeah.

43:23

20% of meerkat deaths

43:25

are murders. Meerkats

43:28

are highly social form packs of

43:30

two to 30. Ew, look how

43:32

evil. Look at that picture they chose. I

43:35

see it now. The

43:37

number one most murderous mammal.

43:41

That's definitely not what I meant. That's

43:45

the best twist I could have ever

43:47

hoped for. The number

43:49

one most murderous mammal. I

43:51

used to have a meerkat stuffed animal. What

43:53

is with you and all the animal stuffed animals? I have a stuffed

43:55

turtle. I have two stuffed turtles at home.

43:58

Yeah. That's a lot of. I know people,

44:00

he probably wouldn't think that of me. Yeah. Yeah.

44:03

She's not that many. Two

44:06

turtles. I only have one animal at a time. Are

44:09

you sure? Are you sure that meerkats

44:11

are this aggressive towards one another? They're

44:14

murderous, man. I just said it, we just googled it. It

44:16

said, what's the number one aggressive mammal?

44:19

Okay, yeah. I thought hippos were, honestly. 37% of

44:22

the knifings in the Serengeti are meerkats.

44:25

The other 70% are me. Did

44:29

you know that 37% of the knifings in

44:32

Sub-Saharan Africa are meerkats? Are

44:35

done by meerkats. Just are running around with a bag

44:37

of... Did

44:42

you lock the back door, honey? No, why?

44:49

Oh no, they're coming. Encounters between members

44:51

of different packs are highly aggressive, leading

44:53

to severe injuries and often deaths.

44:56

19% of meerkats die by conspecific violence.

45:04

I assume that means...

45:05

Not specific. Species on species

45:08

crime. Wow.

45:11

That's a

45:13

fascinating fact.

45:15

What does conspecific violence mean?

45:18

I mean, hold on. We're doing this,

45:20

guys. There's no rhyme or reason

45:22

to why they're killing. Belonging to the same species,

45:24

okay, yeah.

45:27

So there

45:27

you go. That's definitely not what I meant, Jordan. I

45:30

meant your carefree, friendly

45:32

nature and your generally

45:34

amicable attitude.

45:37

Not the knifings because those are just alleged at

45:39

this stage. So maybe we just go with

45:41

the golden retriever. Nobody

45:44

proved anything. I've always resonated

45:46

with the naked chimp. That's

45:48

not a species man. Chimps are

45:50

pretty violent too, though.

45:52

They are, man.

45:53

I have seen you throw your shit before. Why were

45:56

you in there? I

46:00

don't lock that door that yeah, that was that time

46:02

that he like we found him and then he

46:04

got really embarrassed It was like method acting but

46:06

we asked him for what and he like we had a wash them all

46:08

I was in character Yeah for the thing which

46:10

character? Yeah,

46:13

all right, so you're your self ascribed

46:15

spirit animal is a

46:17

chimpanzee naked chimp

46:20

well

46:20

No, well

46:22

some are more naked than others Jake, but

46:24

I want you to Google naked chimp because it

46:27

chimpanzee Boil boy

46:29

look if you're God if you're is

46:31

this an actual species They're

46:34

the second most murderous

46:38

I don't think naked

46:41

chimpanzee is a subspecies. I think it's just

46:43

a chimpanzee that's lost all its hair No, no,

46:45

no, it's a chimp that plays by its own rules

46:48

and shows who wants to show Hairless

46:51

mutation Yeah

46:54

I'm hairless This

46:57

is from the National Institute of Health

46:59

a hairless mutation introduced into the chimpanzee

47:02

human last common ancestor six million

47:04

years ago diverged hairless human

47:06

and hairy chimpanzee lineages

47:09

That doesn't

47:12

mean that oh God

47:15

this is a real thing. Oh, yeah Welcome.

47:19

So why do you welcome to the Brotherhood? So

47:24

your your spirit guide

47:27

your guide into the spirit realm

47:29

is the missing link Yes,

47:33

yes I

47:35

think we all need to go watch brother

47:36

bear and come back tomorrow.

47:38

What is that shout out? I'm glaze. Oh,

47:41

we haven't seen brother bear. I watch

47:43

a surprise of their movies. I Always

47:47

intend to I had on VHS. Oh,

47:50

this is an old one. Yeah Brother, babe,

47:52

I don't know when it came out Did

47:58

the same thing man

47:59

Okay, it takes a while to

48:02

like adjust My

48:06

worldview The

48:14

background a corridor like crew videos there's

48:16

just like a chimpanzee in a diaper someone's

48:18

like running out Monte no Yeah,

48:26

yeah, yeah, yeah, I

48:28

Stop thinking about it. So why

48:30

why why it's I mean

48:32

look at all, you know There's

48:35

there's a beauty in how they just bear

48:38

all you know what I mean? They're

48:40

just they are who they are. They

48:42

hide nothing They show the world

48:45

and the world judges them for

48:47

it the world They're

48:51

just so ugly man, I love them. I

48:53

don't know. They're just my favorite animal. I

48:56

love them, dude. They're weird Look at this thing

48:58

man. That looks like when you go over to grandpa's

49:00

house What

49:12

tell me about the war

49:14

I

49:21

told you we're coming over here like 97% of

49:24

the same DNA. Yeah

49:26

You see a hairless

49:28

and you're really like that's that's us dude

49:30

We

49:34

are we are just naked chimps

49:36

just yeah, we just split six million years

49:38

ago, that's about it Yeah,

49:41

just a little bit better posture

49:42

They

49:45

got to keep the the hand feet and we got the gene

49:47

that like we invented Coca-Cola They're they're

49:50

so strong though, like actually Christian you pulled that picture over

49:52

time. Yeah, these things are like act like they're

49:59

Looking at their muscles, you'd kind of think

50:02

that they're like

50:03

kind of strong, right? But their muscles are

50:05

like so much stronger than our muscles. It's

50:08

like those pimples that have muscles. Yeah,

50:10

they just rip your arms off.

50:12

Chimps scare, chimps actually scare me more than

50:14

any other animal. Look at that dude, look at that dude.

50:16

But you know they're one weakness. They

50:19

do have one severe weakness and

50:21

they share it with gorillas and also

50:23

orangutans.

50:24

They cannot float in water because

50:26

their muscle and bone density is too

50:29

high. They sink in water. Gorillas,

50:31

chimpanzees, and I believe orangutans are like

50:34

horribly afraid of water because they will just drop like

50:36

a rock. It makes sense man, it's like corded steel

50:38

dude, those freaking biceps. And

50:40

what's crazy is like obviously they're

50:42

hyper intelligent monkeys are and

50:44

they know when they attack you, they know the parts

50:46

to attack and that's

50:48

the scariest part about them. They know the soft

50:51

spots and they're like, they go

50:53

for the balls, both the eyeballs and the

50:55

other ones and they go for the fingers. They

50:58

just look to maim you when they're mad and

51:00

it's the most terrible. Now this has nothing to do with why

51:02

I associate with them. I

51:04

just wanna clarify that. I'm still trying to figure

51:07

out why you associate with them. They're honestly to

51:09

be totally transparent, they're just my favorite. They're my favorite.

51:12

So I wanna try and be more like

51:14

them. I don't think you should. I

51:16

don't think so. Yeah, I go home

51:18

and I just strip completely naked.

51:21

Strip completely naked. Natural abs. Look

51:23

for someone to maim. I

51:27

don't know what animal I am, dude. I have no idea.

51:30

No, you're the naked chimp. It's settled. Naked

51:32

chimp or the mere cat either

51:34

way, I'm deadly baby. Why are you so violent?

51:36

What is this history of violence that you have?

51:39

It's, you know, I think I

51:41

smile too much and people don't trust that. So

51:44

are we gonna do an anamorph of you just

51:46

morphing into a naked chimp? They,

51:50

Matt and Dean picked mine. I don't know what they picked,

51:53

but they assigned me my

51:55

spirit animal. We assigned everybody their spirit

51:58

animal, you know, based on just, we had some.

51:59

conversations down here

52:00

and worked through some stuff.

52:03

Let me hear it. Let me in on the insides. Who'd

52:05

you? I mean, the video's

52:07

not gonna be out yet, so it's kind of a surprise.

52:10

So I don't know that I wanna spoil what

52:12

we're morphing everybody into. And you're listening

52:14

to this before the video's out, you

52:16

have to stop here. This is a warning. This

52:19

is a warning. There will be a spoiler here. I'll give

52:21

you one. I'll give you one tasty one. Okay.

52:23

Matt, he doesn't know this yet.

52:26

He really wanted to be an otter. I'm not

52:28

sure why. I can kind of see it though.

52:30

No, he's talked about, he loves

52:32

otters. He loves otters and he wants to be an

52:35

otter. And that's

52:37

a whole thing with him. It's giving otters.

52:40

It's giving otter, but the problem is he asked to be an

52:42

otter. And that's a no-no. That's a no-no in

52:44

the Animorphs world. And so

52:47

being from Florida,

52:48

I don't even remember why we

52:50

talked about it on camera. And in the moment

52:52

it felt like a perfect fit, but we made him a manatee.

52:55

I thought

52:57

you were gonna say crocodile. No, we made him a manatee.

53:00

And it's hilarious. Cause watching the body morph,

53:02

cause they all start in like their normal standard position.

53:05

So he's kind of just like, he's begging in

53:07

his animation not to be changed. And

53:09

then he just gets like lifted off the ground and

53:12

his legs shrink and flatten and his head

53:14

grows big and oblong. And he just

53:16

assumes the form of this busted manatee.

53:18

And it's so fricking funny. It's

53:20

gonna be great. How are you hiding that from him

53:23

with the monitor situation being as close

53:25

to his computer as yours? He's

53:28

working from home today. Cause we're back to back

53:30

in the studio. So he will just naturally

53:32

glance over shoulder. I do the same thing. And it would have

53:34

ruined the whole thing. So either I was gonna work down here in the podcast

53:37

room where in shut the curtains or

53:39

take advantage of today. And we finished it today.

53:41

And so that's

53:43

done. But for the other people who are gonna

53:45

see, I'm gonna need to be sneaky. That's gonna be

53:47

the hardest part. Sneaking around and making

53:49

the transformations. But

53:51

it's the craziest video.

53:54

I just keep catching Daniel smiling

53:56

and laughing, watching it cause it's so chaotic.

53:58

And I don't know how he's gonna do it.

53:59

but Daniel is a master editor, so he'll

54:02

find a way to tell the story. He'll

54:04

find a way. He'll find a way. If anyone

54:06

can, it's Daniel. Yeah, oh

54:08

man. It's beautiful, man.

54:11

What have we done?

54:13

I woke up this morning with a big fat

54:15

smile on my face, knowing I'd spend the day doing this,

54:17

so. All right, so. Bring me joy.

54:19

Last topic here, Jalen, when

54:22

you were away,

54:27

we did a trick shots video and it's coming.

54:30

It's coming out this weekend. I

54:32

heard about this in passing and I don't know exactly

54:34

what you did, but my first thought was

54:37

how the heck did you do it without me? Like,

54:39

how could you betray the one-one?

54:42

You know what I mean? So this is

54:44

officially a side quest

54:47

to

54:47

beat,

54:49

to get a side

54:51

item so that I can beat you, which is

54:53

my main boss.

54:55

You have a side item? Yeah, I

54:57

have a side item. What do you have? I

55:00

can't tell you until. Do you know what you have or are you still

55:02

in the rhythm? I know what I have. I know what he has. What?

55:05

Is it

55:05

gonna work? I think it's gonna work, right? I

55:08

think you're in for trouble. That's what I have to say

55:10

about it. Do you know what this is? My

55:13

headphones cut out for the last 45 seconds, so.

55:17

He says he has a side item to beat me in Dude

55:20

Perfect.

55:21

Trick shot. Trick shot render challenge.

55:24

Are you aware of it? Oh, you're talking about the. Oh. Like

55:28

the. Yeah. What is that? The thing.

55:31

What is that? The thing with the thing. Oh yeah,

55:33

I know about this. Yeah. I love that

55:34

you did this. I don't really understand it, but I know what it

55:37

is. So if you're interested in catching up

55:39

on the saga, you can watch the

55:41

previous two where Jordan and I compete against

55:43

each other. And this went by

55:46

the time this podcast comes out, there'll be

55:48

another one coming out on

55:50

the weekend. And yeah,

55:52

I had to face off against Sam.

55:55

I can't wait to see that. He brought

55:57

training. You as he? Yes. Is

55:59

he judicing the scene? Well, he's- Is he brotherhood?

56:01

He was honestly trying to beat me, but the lesson

56:04

was to break me so

56:08

that he could rebuild me.

56:11

So it's like, this is your Rocky montage basically.

56:13

Yes, this is totally my Rocky montage. So imagine

56:16

the Rocky movie,

56:17

if at the end of the montage he still lost,

56:20

because that's what you're gonna be watching.

56:23

He lost, yeah,

56:25

but the same way that Lightning McQueen

56:28

loses in the first car-

56:30

Oh, spoilers.

56:31

Well, yeah, it's like from 2006 or something. So

56:35

it's actually still a victory. So

56:37

no matter what you're going to lose,

56:40

Jordan, I just want you to know- I am

56:42

fascinated to watch this. I

56:46

might need to level up myself. We'll have to think about

56:48

how I can elevate, because the Wall-E future, dude, it's

56:51

right within my grasp,

56:53

and I've been enjoying the victory. There's been some comments

56:55

about the wind too. I must warn you.

56:58

Oh, have there. Oh, do people. Well, here's

57:00

the thing about CG, baby.

57:01

I'm allowed to do whatever I want. I'm

57:03

the God in that CG world. I can control the winds

57:06

if I want to. There's nothing you can do about

57:08

it. You can take the lid off the cup if you want

57:10

to. I can take the lid off the cup.

57:12

Or put it back on. Or put it

57:14

back on, baby. It's my world, and you're

57:16

merely living in it. Let me tell you. Well,

57:19

you're not, because you're not in it. Anyway, it doesn't matter. Direct threat.

57:21

The mayor cat's coming out. Point is, people can

57:23

hate on the wind all they want. The

57:25

wind exists in the real world, and therefore can exist in my system.

57:28

The difference is I

57:29

can control it. And haters

57:32

going to hate. But winner's going to

57:34

win, baby. I'm very excited. I've enjoyed

57:36

this saga so much. There you go.

57:39

You see where he's at, people. You see

57:41

my enemy before me. He

57:43

must be defeated. We can't allow this to happen. The Wally

57:46

Future, baby. I'm fighting for it. Unionize.

57:48

I just like saying that so much.

57:51

Oh, man. All right. Sorry.

57:54

I'm very excited about this Animorphs video. It'll be

57:56

out the weekend after this episode

57:58

comes out.

57:59

And, uh, man, after that, a whole

58:02

bunch of goodies in the bag. We got that punch for punch

58:04

episode coming out soon. We got anime rock,

58:06

paper, scissors two on deck. So

58:09

stay tuned everybody. Cause it's going to be a wild

58:11

summer. Woo.

58:13

Wow. Play is out baby. Y'all

58:15

ready?

58:22

I'm feeling murders. Thank

58:24

you for turning into the corridor podcast.

58:27

This week's podcast was sponsored by, uh,

58:30

a wild world of the undersea

58:32

laugh. Thanks

58:38

for watching everybody. See you on the next one.