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1:02

there, critters! There are so

1:04

many stories yet to be told within

1:06

Exandria, and we love finding new ways

1:09

to explore our ever-growing world. That's why

1:11

we're so excited to introduce you to

1:13

the first episode of our brand new

1:15

podcast, The Re-Slayers Take. Now to give

1:17

some context before we begin, some of

1:19

you may already know from our Vox

1:21

Machina days that the Slayers Take is

1:23

the most impressive monster hunting guild in

1:25

Exandria. They are a force to be

1:27

reckoned with and have slain many ferocious

1:29

mythic beasts. But when these once-dead creatures

1:31

start returning from the grave, it's

1:33

up to six misfit mercenaries to

1:35

band together and re-slay these supernatural

1:38

threats as the Re-Slayers Take. This

1:40

story is led by an incredible

1:42

duo of game masters, George Pimavera

1:44

and Nick Williams, and the main

1:46

cast includes some immensely talented folks

1:48

like Jasmine Bueller, Jasper William Cartwright,

1:50

Jasmine Xiong, and Caroline Lux. Plus,

1:52

the show has some pretty awesome

1:54

guests like the brilliant Christian Navarro,

1:56

the legendary Dominic Monaghan, and some

1:58

guy you may have heard. heard of

2:00

named Sam Riegel? So if you

2:02

like what you hear, check out the Reeslayers Take

2:04

podcast page on your favorite streaming platform and listen

2:07

to more episodes of this epic adventure every Monday.

2:09

Or become a beacon member and listen to the

2:12

series two weeks early and uninterrupted by ads. Now

2:15

without further ado, let's begin the first

2:17

episode of the Reeslayers Take. We

2:20

open on a chilly, misty morning

2:22

in the Vesper Timberland, as the

2:24

citizens of the humble town of

2:26

Himblewood begin preparing for their festive

2:28

monthly market. The vibrant, lush woodland

2:30

of the Vesper Timberland frames the

2:32

town in a truly picturesque embrace,

2:35

and soon, colorful tents and

2:37

awnings are erected all along

2:39

Himblewood's uneven cobblestone streets. The

2:42

plain hodgepodge of houses and

2:44

shops are quickly accented with

2:46

decorative streamers, gaudy signage and

2:48

flamboyant displays, and as noon

2:51

rolls around, the market gets into full

2:53

swing. The air is

2:55

filled with a variety of dazzling

2:57

aromas, the smells of fruity frosted

2:59

cakes, pungent stinky cheeses, and briny,

3:02

slimy fish mix in the air.

3:04

And at the edge of a street

3:07

band's captive crowd, we see a tall

3:09

hooded figure looking shyly on, a

3:11

figure we know as Frog. Frog

3:14

stands about 6 feet 10 inches

3:16

tall. Her body is

3:18

humanoid in shape but metallic in

3:20

nature. She's copper with

3:23

gilded and ornate accents that now have

3:25

taken on a greenish patina

3:27

over time. To cover this

3:29

up and blend in more, she

3:31

wears a hooded poncho and belted

3:34

high-waisted corduroy trousers. When

3:36

she's active, her eyes glow a dull blue so

3:38

she wears large, round spectacles to dim

3:40

them. Across her back, she

3:42

has a worn leather nap sack which houses her most

3:45

prized possession, a beat-up looking

3:47

journal where she jots down all her

3:49

notes and discoveries. Frog, as you

3:51

listen to the music, you feel a sharp

3:53

tug on your clothing from behind. A

3:56

Small child with a little bit of snot

3:58

bubbling at his nose exclaims. No

4:15

to Sweden check. Seven

4:17

As you lean down, frog, your

4:19

spectacles whole, down on your metallic

4:22

nose and a child's eyes go

4:24

wide as he sees the right

4:26

blue or signing into his own

4:28

eyes. Ah, and he

4:31

backs up a little frightened and

4:33

then takes off back away through

4:35

the crowd. To

4:45

the band. Playing with. Excitement, she

4:47

pulls out her journal and just

4:49

found the sake of all the

4:51

instruments. Never seen something

4:53

like this before. The band song ends,

4:56

there's a polite applause from the surrounding

4:58

crowd, and then the crowd begins to

5:00

disperse. As you wander on fraud, you

5:02

reach a small eatery with barrels stacked

5:05

up behind a small counter with a

5:07

couple of chairs and tables spread out

5:09

on the cobblestone main road. At a

5:12

countertop, there is a hunch to figure

5:14

that seems to repel every else is

5:16

presence. Even the shopkeeper behind the counter

5:18

mixing colorful beverages seems to avoid her

5:21

gaze. Fraud. It strikes

5:23

you just how lonely this must be for someone

5:25

to sit all alone on such a joyful dance.

5:27

Fab sits down next to them offer

5:29

some easy. Company Turning to look at

5:31

who has sat next to her we

5:33

see. Thera, A half elves and

5:36

woman with silver hair. She sits tall

5:38

and proud. Her warring studded leather armor

5:40

see no longer fills out suggests a

5:42

life of adventure. See as long left

5:45

behind, Therapies know mine to the person

5:47

that just sat next to her. Despite

5:49

their large frame, she continues to eat

5:51

the food in front of her, concentrating

5:53

on every bite. anna

5:58

like music That's

6:01

cool. That's the

6:03

best. That's the best. This

6:06

is the one that's taken care of. And

6:09

Frog holds up her journal showing

6:11

a quick sketch that she had done

6:13

of a guitar. She doesn't know

6:15

what a guitar is. Sarah looks

6:18

at Frog skeptically. That's

6:20

a guitar. A

6:22

guitar? Wow. This

6:24

is so so much of

6:27

so much of this incredible, so-so-so. Aww.

6:32

Sarah pushes the unknown patron sitting to her

6:34

right off their seat and sidles

6:36

away from Frog. Sarah moves over

6:38

leaving a seat between her and

6:40

Frog. Both of you make a perception

6:42

check. Twenty-two. Natural

6:45

one. Frog, as

6:47

you stare joyfully ahead, Sarah scrutinizes your

6:49

person. Sarah, you notice

6:52

sticking out of the pocket of

6:54

this enormous figure's corduroy is a familiar

6:56

red-hued piece of parchment. One

6:58

that you happen to have in your own pocket. You're

7:01

a hunter? I'm

7:10

sorry. I just want to know what the red slip in

7:12

your pocket is. Ow! How

7:14

is it? I'm

7:21

sorry. I'm sorry.

7:25

I'm sorry. I'm

7:27

sorry. I'm

7:29

sorry. I'm sorry.

7:33

I'm sorry. I'm

7:36

sorry. I'm sorry. Sarah,

7:39

make an investigation check. Not

7:41

twenty. As you peer

7:44

at this figure, you see a

7:46

faint blue glow emanating from behind

7:48

dark spectacles and a very

7:50

shiny looking face. It would

7:52

seem this person is in a full

7:54

suit of armor, which you also deduce

7:57

from the tinny nature of their voice,

7:59

as if it's reverberating off of material.

8:01

You're looking a little, uh, clammy.

8:05

Clammy? Whoa. I'm

8:07

gonna write that down. At the fishmongers

8:09

on the other side of the market, standing

8:11

in front of an enormous and bizarrely colored

8:14

swordfish on a bed of ice, we see...

8:17

Idren Shadowstep, a young

8:19

half-orc half-elf, reaches forward with his left

8:21

hand, on the back of which is

8:23

a tattoo of the moon. On

8:26

the back of his right hand, there's a

8:28

corresponding tattoo of the sun. He

8:30

wears matching gold earrings in both ears.

8:33

He's wearing flowing robes in tones of

8:35

reds, browns and golds, with a pattern

8:38

that looks like fragments of a starry

8:40

sky. Then he moves his

8:42

hand to his satchel that sits on his left

8:44

hip, next to a dagger. He

8:47

reaches in and finds a silver coin

8:49

that rests between his clay-toned fingers and

8:51

painted black nails, staring at this strange

8:54

fish in front of him. Aye,

8:57

you're high in old Bertha, is ya? I

8:59

am! Well, heh heh,

9:02

old Mickey Horslaff-Tollison-Cottold Bertha

9:04

just nigh on two

9:06

days ago. I've

9:08

been chasing that fish my entire life.

9:12

Only two gold pieces per pound. So,

9:14

you're saying that this fish is as old as you

9:16

are? Oh yes, even older

9:18

than old Horslaff. And for a

9:20

hundred gold, I'll give you the

9:22

whole fish. What can I get

9:25

for a silver piece? A

9:27

silver piece? Don't

9:30

make me Horslaff! Let

9:34

me show you over to the bargaining section. I'll

9:37

give you three or four for silver. That

9:39

would be perfect! If you dry it

9:41

and prepare it properly and add a little bit

9:43

of magic, you can make anything delicious. Friend,

9:46

with fish like this, a little bit of magic

9:48

is all you need. Now back

9:50

to old Bertha. I was there,

9:53

out on the lake, in my old

9:55

tugboat, Christine. And I've been

9:58

fishing that hole for quite some time. Years

10:00

and from. Anywhere from

10:03

a family grabbed onto my

10:05

hope and mild Christine was

10:07

dragged clear across so our

10:09

home on for dear life.

10:12

But then. Christine.

10:14

Hit a rock and I was

10:16

flown into the brandy like itself

10:18

when takes a good mother. Looked

10:20

at assists wondering how this thing

10:22

as is often a late either

10:24

and make a nature fifty. Seven.

10:28

This is an unfamiliar fist you

10:30

but thing that catches your eye

10:33

is the iridescent green stripe that

10:35

extends and snow to tail. He

10:37

cleans like an open. it is

10:40

listening to the strains. Potentially delirious

10:42

old man but cannot take his

10:45

eyes of that beautiful striped orange.

10:47

Sure, after a prolonged boxing match

10:49

the surface I was victorious and

10:52

a robin town with my price

10:54

tags. Oh Bertha! I

10:56

must. Say you are one of the strangest

10:58

people I have ever met. But.

11:01

You. Actually reminds me of my mother a little bit.

11:04

Oh. You

11:06

young man, see. Has done

11:08

things that make no sense to. I

11:10

once saw her lift a bold and

11:12

with her mind it was astounding. So.

11:16

Sick of this bold with her mind and

11:18

you can chat swiss I guess anything is.

11:20

Possible that anything is possible. Now please

11:22

buy some old face or good or

11:25

heck outta here because this paying

11:27

customers waiting behind Yes of course He

11:29

turned, reaches into the satchel and

11:31

pulls out Silva Peace and hands it

11:33

over and then picks up his

11:35

this excitedly grinning more from having been

11:38

able to get a free story along

11:40

with his death. Of

11:44

crap oh man. As the crab is

11:46

flying through the air, Adrian looks back

11:49

and let's out a whistling sound. as

11:52

a whole comes the crab midair

11:55

and comes to land on his

11:57

shoulder tesla that was a very

11:59

good You're getting better at

12:01

this. Edran, you continue to gaze at

12:03

the vast array of goods being hocked at the

12:05

market today, and a conversation

12:08

being had by an old woman behind

12:10

a table full of jewelry catches her

12:12

ear. And you see, arguing with the

12:14

elderly shopkeep, a tiefling woman. Tieflings

12:16

look very much like humans, but

12:19

their infernal bloodlines bestow upon them

12:21

thick tails, horns, and a mouthful

12:23

of sharp canine teeth. Hira

12:26

Agnihart is a tiefling

12:29

with an ochre complexion. She

12:31

wears leather armor embossed with henna designs,

12:34

strapped over green, emerald

12:36

green, and Prussian blue silks.

12:39

She has water buffalo-style horns that

12:41

she ties with ribbons and peacock

12:43

feathers. But I don't

12:45

understand. Why would I pay you

12:47

to steal my precious jewels? Because

12:51

if you pay me

12:53

to steal your jewels,

12:55

then you'll know the

12:57

deficiencies in your security

12:59

system, thereby preventing further

13:01

theft. Also, half of

13:03

these jewels are fake. Okay,

13:05

I want to come back to that, but

13:07

first to address your first

13:09

point. Security system. What is

13:12

that? Well, a security

13:14

system essentially keeps your

13:16

valuables from people who

13:18

want them. Oh,

13:21

Ismae Squawks? If he sees somebody

13:24

snatch something, don't you wish. Don't you wish.

13:26

Who's a good bird? Yes.

13:28

A very ancient-looking parakeet sheds several

13:30

feathers as the old woman pats

13:32

the wing. I

13:35

think Ismae's eyes may be going,

13:37

because they didn't catch me pocket

13:40

these four gems, and Hira

13:42

holds a loft, four gems between her

13:44

fingers. Ah, ah, ah,

13:46

Ismae, you are losing your

13:49

touch, you old thing. Hira,

13:52

make a deception check to try to pass

13:54

off your own jewels as this old woman's.

13:58

Nineteen. Clearly

14:00

I am in dire need of

14:02

your services, young lady. Just

14:05

show me where I sign." Coming

14:07

up on Hira's side, lost in the shining

14:09

of the gems, is Idran. What,

14:12

uh, what is happening here?

14:14

Uh, just a business transaction

14:16

between two parties? Yes,

14:18

she stole my gems and now I'm paying

14:21

her. Precisely so. Are

14:23

you hungry? And Idran pulls out a fish

14:26

that is raw. Me? Hira

14:28

hasn't eaten in days and is no

14:30

longer in a position to turn her

14:32

nose up at this food. She

14:35

takes the slimy fish, holding it between

14:37

two fingers, and says, Thank

14:39

you, you're very kind. My

14:42

pleasure. And you? Would

14:44

you like a fish? Oh no, I'm on

14:46

a grain-only diet. I bet

14:48

that's why you are preserved so well.

14:51

Now if you just sign here with

14:53

your quill, we can get you locked

14:55

in for a five-year plan. Done

14:58

and done! What is your name?

15:01

Hira. You'll be stealing her gems

15:03

for five years and she pays

15:05

you for it? Uh, not

15:08

quite like that, no. I

15:11

steal her gems so that other

15:13

thieves fail at stealing them. It's

15:16

really quite beneficial to both parties.

15:19

Well, of course they'll fail at stealing

15:21

them if there's no gems to steal. Exactly!

15:24

Eidran and Hira continue to mosey

15:26

curiously through the market. Do

15:28

you think we could maybe find a place

15:30

where we could pay them to cook the

15:32

fish? I would like a snack

15:35

before I go audition for the Slayer's Take. Oh!

15:38

You're going to the Slayer's Take? As

15:41

a sheer desperation, yes, it's come

15:43

to this unfortunately. Oh,

15:45

so am I. But less out

15:48

of desperation, more out of,

15:50

um, excitement. I'm

15:52

sorry. I know what it's like. Which

15:55

path? Exactly. Taking anything

15:57

you can get to just get by. Oh!

16:00

I understand. No, no, that's not

16:02

why. We are brothers together in

16:04

this. We will get by together.

16:06

Yes. Idren pauses to

16:08

look at this figure and has a

16:10

moment where he just thinks, Your

16:13

father taught you how to do this. Sometimes

16:15

people will say things, and if it's not

16:17

harmful, you agree. Because they're happy.

16:20

Yes. Thank you for understanding

16:22

me. Together, we'll build

16:24

our fortunes again. We will.

16:27

And then we will have cooked fish. Her

16:30

nostrils flail a little bit with disgust

16:32

at the smell and the slime of

16:35

the fish, but she's also very

16:37

hungry. You know, I could

16:39

probably cook it very quickly. Idren looks

16:42

around for an empty spot. Roll

16:44

the perception check. Fourteen. There

16:47

is not quite an alleyway, but

16:49

a small, narrow path between two

16:51

buildings where several barrels are stacked

16:54

up, allowing for a completely obscured

16:56

corner. Hera, right? Yes, I don't

16:58

think I caught your name. Idren

17:01

bows. My name is Idren. Idren

17:03

Shatterstab. Follow me. I

17:06

would be very obliged. I have never

17:08

cooked a day in my life. And she

17:10

hands her fish back to him. Idren

17:12

grabs it, and then takes two of the

17:14

barrels and puts them down, and

17:16

pulls out his dagger and lays it across. He

17:19

gently puts two fish on top of

17:21

it as he speaks a few words

17:23

in Elvish, and he casts Create Bonfire.

17:26

A small fire appears underneath to gently

17:28

heat the metal and cook these fish.

17:31

The fish sizzle on the metallic surface of

17:33

the knife. Soon a pleasant aroma fills

17:35

the air. I think they're ready.

17:38

Sir, you are a gentleman and

17:40

a scholar and a cook. She

17:42

grabs one and takes a bite.

17:45

Idren does the same. This is

17:47

the best meal I've had in days.

17:49

And within moments Hera devours the entire

17:52

fish, bones and all. Midday

17:54

rolls around. The time denoted on

17:56

the red-hued parchment. For the beginning

17:58

of the Slayer's Take. recruit presentation,

18:00

and all four of our travelers find

18:03

a surprisingly modest booth with the

18:05

symbol of the Slayer's Take hastily scrawled

18:07

on an oversized piece of parchment and

18:09

nailed to the front of it. A

18:12

goblin sits behind the table atop a

18:15

tall stool, drawing several looks

18:17

from passers-by, which the little goblin

18:19

returns with a cheery, oblivious wave.

18:22

As Sarah walks over, she lectures frog,

18:24

finding the ego boost she desperately needed

18:26

with this person who wants to hear

18:28

all she has to say. Alright, so

18:31

you're here to learn things when we

18:33

teach you something. Uh-huh. These people are

18:35

ruthless, these people are tough. They're monster

18:37

hunters. All they want is money. So,

18:40

you just gotta prove that you're better.

18:42

Okay. You're tall. Push people

18:44

over. Oh, like push people over without,

18:47

like asking them or anything? Yeah. Do

18:49

what you gotta do to stand out. Well, you already

18:51

stand out. Oh, I was gonna

18:53

say something about you, you're bored. Yeah,

18:56

don't take them. I would never. You would

18:58

have to hold me about how you want

19:01

to follow me.

19:05

So don't focus on that. I'm not your competition.

19:07

These guys are your competition, okay? I'm gonna, I'm

19:09

getting this contract either way. Look at me.

19:12

I'm, I'm the best. You want number two?

19:14

You gotta prove you're number two amongst these

19:16

people. Sarah gestures to a line of folks

19:18

that are scribbling down their names on a

19:21

long list, as the goblin reads from a

19:23

piece of paper, speaking to them in a

19:25

very formal fashion. But you can't quite hear

19:27

what's being said. Sarah and

19:29

Frog end up directly behind Edrin and

19:31

Hira, sucking the last of the fish

19:34

meat off of very little brittle bones.

19:36

I think we should thin out the

19:39

competition, Edrin. Okay. Maybe

19:41

a diversion. It'd be awful if someone

19:43

wanders off just as their name was

19:46

called. How would we do that exactly?

19:49

Hira is going to take an appraising

19:51

look at the people in line in

19:53

front of her and using her eye

19:55

for detail, try to see if she

19:57

can find something on their person or

19:59

some thing about them that

20:01

would denote another responsibility she can pull

20:03

on. Roll an investigation check.

20:08

In front of Hera, there is a

20:10

woman standing with a very palpable anticipation,

20:12

seemingly very excited to get her name

20:14

down on this list. Hera looks

20:16

down her figure down to a belt, on

20:19

which is a burlap pouch

20:21

with the outline symbol of an

20:23

apple, and gazing around the market,

20:25

she finds the exact same symbol

20:27

on a shop sign some couple

20:29

of hundred feet down the street. And

20:31

she sprints out of line back to the grocers. As

20:52

soon as the four of you approach, the

20:55

little goblin pulls out a

20:57

little note card and begins

21:05

to read. The first thing

21:08

you notice about this goblin are

21:10

his perfectly straight white teeth. Hera

21:26

looks utterly taken aback. You

21:28

have a very charming smile. Thank

21:30

you. Do you want to

21:33

hear the story of my smile? No. Yes,

21:36

free. When I was a goblin influenced by

21:38

the curse of strife and was relieved of

21:40

that burden, the first thing I did was

21:42

take out all of my teeth and

21:45

then found a wizard to replace him and

21:47

he gave me lead. And

21:49

Poogs, the goblin, reaches into his mouth

21:51

and pulls out his full set of

21:53

dentures. That's where I thought they were

21:55

a little big. But

21:59

I like the way they look. I'll do it

22:01

on again. Thank

22:04

you so much. You're welcome. Maybe

22:07

you can grow into them. You

22:09

think so? I mean, who knows

22:11

anything is possible. Your problem

22:13

is you're made for people, and

22:16

you're a little big for my little goblin mouth, so

22:19

we make do with what we got. And he slides

22:22

the parchment forward, places the

22:24

quill down, go ahead and write your names, and

22:26

then go ahead and tell me what your inspiration

22:28

was for joining the cake. Hera

22:31

takes the pen, and in a

22:33

very flourishy, cursive handwriting writes down

22:35

her name, and says

22:37

pointedly, Hunger. That's

22:40

a great reason. And you? Um,

22:44

I would like to defend others from danger.

22:47

Strange question, may I see your

22:49

teeth? Edron

22:52

grabs the teeth and looks at the goblin's

22:54

face, and then tries to resize them a

22:56

little bit. Edron says probably

22:59

breaks and cracks, but

23:01

after Edron does that, he

23:03

reaches into his pocket and pulls out two

23:05

lodestones, and then says

23:07

a few words over the dentures and

23:10

casts mending, trying to

23:12

reshape them to be a more appropriate size after breaking them

23:14

a bit. Edron, make an

23:16

arcana check. Ten.

23:20

The mending spell does indeed alter the shape of these

23:23

a little bit, but as the spell takes effect,

23:26

Edron says that Edron was attempting to make come

23:28

slightly undone. When

23:30

this happens, Edron looks at it and sees that

23:32

it's not the way that he wants, and in

23:34

that moment, there's a surge in his eyes as

23:37

he uses a chronal shift. Just

23:40

to Edron's eyes, the world

23:42

seems to rewind a few seconds,

23:45

and Edron feels himself gain another

23:47

chance to alter the teeth

23:49

correctly. Make another arcana check.

23:53

Seventeen. And this time,

23:55

the teeth reduce in size appropriately

23:58

for a goblin. Here you go. Oh?

24:00

What did you do? They might fit a

24:02

little bit more comfortably now. Let me- Oh!

24:06

Those went in really- Easy. Easy.

24:10

Wow. Is this permanent? It

24:13

is. This is great! You're great!

24:15

Adrian signs his name very quickly. Who's

24:17

next? Uh, congratulations on

24:19

the new teeth. Yeah, it's huge. I'm still kind of

24:22

processing it. What's your name? I'm just going

24:24

to turn it down. Frog picks up

24:26

the pen and scribbles her name in

24:28

Just fairly legible writing. Your

24:31

penmanship is beautiful. Yeah. That's

24:45

great! I learned a lot in the player's

24:47

tape. Very like what? Um,

24:50

who's next? Sarah writes down

24:52

her name. I'm a monster

24:54

hunter. I hunt monsters. Yeah, well

24:56

that's what we do, so that works great. Uh,

24:58

if you guys will take a seat over there,

25:00

the presentation should be starting pretty soon. And

25:03

our four travelers go about trying

25:06

to find a seat amidst several

25:08

wooden chairs set before a clumsily

25:10

constructed stage. As they're

25:13

coming in, Adrian actually turns to the two behind

25:15

him. Adrian, nice to meet

25:17

you. Oh, and Frog

25:20

likes a frog? Frogs like

25:22

a frog is a little bit more

25:24

like a frog. I'm a little bit more like a frog.

25:27

I'm a little bit more like a

25:29

frog. I'm a little bit more like a frog. Do

25:32

you have poison under your head?

25:47

Adrian, roll an investigation check. metallic

26:00

sheen around her face, implying

26:02

that perhaps Frog is wearing a

26:05

full, very tight-fitting suit of armor.

26:08

Interesting. As everybody begins to

26:10

take their seats and the crowd settles,

26:12

while the market continues full blast around

26:14

them, the goblin hops up

26:17

onto the stage and addresses the

26:19

audience. Okay, everybody! Introducing

26:21

our representative from the Slayer's

26:23

Take. Slayer's

26:26

Take. Please welcome

26:28

Timpani Gupp! There's

26:30

a hesitant applause, and bounding up

26:32

onto the stage is... A

26:35

shorter than average, more portly than

26:37

average, fur-bulk. With a shock of

26:39

red hair, on top of his

26:41

head, coming out of his ears,

26:43

and in the form of a large bristly

26:45

mustache on his face. Fur-bolgs

26:48

are tall, hairy folk with pointed

26:50

ears and blue tinged skin, as

26:52

well as broad, cow-like noses. They

26:55

stand much taller than most humans.

26:57

He wears canvas-y pants that have

26:59

been patched over many times, a

27:01

simple tunic, and a barn coat

27:04

that is in similarly bad repair.

27:07

He addresses the crowd excitedly.

27:09

How's it going there? My name

27:12

is Timpani Gupp. Timpani, like the

27:14

beautiful instrument, and Gupp like I

27:16

don't take none from nobody. I'm

27:19

from the Slayer's Take over there

27:21

in Vasselheim, and we're

27:24

here today looking for some new

27:26

recruits, and hey, that

27:28

could be one of you. We're looking for

27:31

normal people who just want to do the

27:33

right thing, but be warned, it's

27:35

not for the faint of heart, or for

27:37

anyone looking to make a fast coin. That's

27:40

not what the Slayer's Take is all about.

27:42

The Slayer's Take is about honor, and glory,

27:46

and protecting the innocent, but also,

27:49

I have made a pretty penny,

27:51

taking down some of the spookiest

27:53

monsters in them there, Vesper Timberland.

27:56

Frog pulls out her journal

27:59

hastily, and down everything that

28:01

timpani goth is saying. Here are

28:03

just murmurs to edran. You

28:05

can do good things and

28:08

get paid. Not mutually exclusive

28:10

I have found. Edran looks at

28:12

the moon on the back of his left hand, and

28:14

then looks at Hera. Sometimes payment

28:16

from good things is more than just

28:18

money. Like friendship. Huh?

28:20

Okay, let's see who we got here

28:23

today. Oh, I see a

28:25

tall lady in the audience. Hey, tall lady,

28:27

are you coming out for the slayer's date?

28:29

You would do a good job hunting down

28:31

them spooky monsters. Do you really think I

28:34

would do a good job? Of course,

28:36

you're so tall. Under her

28:38

breath, Hera whispers to Frog,

28:40

exude confidence. Exude confidence. Yes,

28:43

sir. I can.

28:45

Can do it. Oh, yeah,

28:47

that's exactly the kind of confidence we admire

28:50

in the slayer's date. Why don't you come

28:52

up here on stage with me? Okay.

28:55

Oh, boy, you're even taller than I thought

28:57

when you were sitting down. Why don't you

29:00

just wait for me on stage. I'll get

29:02

a couple more volunteers. And

29:05

you. You look like you've seen

29:07

a couple battles in your day. More

29:09

than a couple. I like the

29:11

cut of your jib and the

29:13

cut of those two short swords on

29:15

your back. Why don't you come join

29:17

your tall friends? Hera works hard to

29:19

exude confidence, but after hearing this

29:21

speech, it suddenly dawns on her how

29:24

long it's been since she lasted this.

29:26

Okay, let's see who else we got here. Please,

29:28

please, please, pick me. Pick me. Pick

29:30

me. Yes, you weigh in

29:33

the back there. Derek. My name's

29:35

Derek. Derek. What's your

29:37

deal, Derek? I was an accountant

29:39

for the Don Marshall's quadrauche. Looking

29:41

for a change. Well, thanks for

29:43

coming, Derek. Who else we

29:45

got in the crowd? Derek disappointingly lowers his

29:48

hand and sits back in his chair. Edron

29:50

puts his hand up. Oh,

29:52

and Mr. Fancy Robes. Yes,

29:55

because sometimes when you have to

29:57

do good, you want to look good. doing

30:00

it. Oh that is exactly

30:02

right. That's that's my motto. Get

30:04

up here and stand on stage.

30:07

Kira sees that her friend is

30:09

gone. The only person she knew

30:11

here and she starts to feel

30:13

a little bit of social anxiety.

30:15

So the next person she

30:17

thinks that timpani is going to point to,

30:19

she rapidly trips them and stands up in

30:21

their place and says, how about, yes me

30:24

as well right. I knew it. Timpani

30:27

checks the sign up sheet.

30:29

All right everybody let's give

30:31

it up for the volunteers.

30:33

Adrian Shadowstep, Pharah,

30:35

No Last Name Given,

30:38

Kira Agniheart, and

30:41

Frog. Okay now

30:43

that we have our

30:45

volunteers, our four brave

30:48

heroes, I will unveil the

30:50

kind of beast you might

30:52

be facing when you join

30:55

the take. But don't be

30:57

a feared. Everything is under

30:59

control. Poogs wheels an enormous box

31:01

atop a dolly covered with a

31:04

red tarp up onto the stage.

31:06

Now again, please do

31:08

not worry. Put all of the

31:11

laymen out there. Take one step

31:13

back for the beast inside of

31:15

this container is not to be

31:18

trifled with. Unless you're

31:20

a verified member of the

31:22

Slayer's Take, like me, timpani

31:24

Gus. And with a grand

31:26

flourish, timpani removes the red

31:28

curtain. Everybody make a perception check. 10,

31:30

16, 16, 18.

31:38

Pharah, you see in this glass

31:40

box several objects suspended in the

31:43

air. A score of arrows

31:45

at all different angles. A

31:47

silvery helmet with a thick bridge

31:50

of the nose. A rusted decrepit

31:52

shield and a perfectly

31:54

preserved fish skeleton. But the

31:56

other three look a little closer at the

31:58

box. This that

32:00

there is something jiggling and waving

32:02

from within. A gelatinous

32:05

cube. Contained within this glass

32:07

box with no apparent opening, only

32:09

about half of the crowd seems

32:12

to realize what's inside. Ladies and

32:14

gentlemen, steal your heart's for. You

32:16

have nothing to be afraid of.

32:18

I am a framed and venerated

32:20

member of the Best Players Steaks

32:23

and that means that Off and

32:25

Timpani accidentally touches his boot between

32:27

the slats of the stage and

32:29

takes a header directly into the

32:32

glass. There's a resounding crass. And

32:35

he drops to the ground.

32:37

Oh oh, that's okay. Thirty

32:39

base. That's all part of

32:41

the job fairs. Dangers in

32:43

hurdle is every turn, but

32:45

nothing to be afraid of.

32:47

Here I am still very

32:49

much in control and behind

32:51

symphony the glass begins to

32:53

spider web crass Verizon. Some

32:55

the point isn't past. Ah,

32:58

hands and knees. And then

33:00

there is a bursting of

33:02

glass as all of the

33:04

glass shatters and Trump's onto

33:06

the stage several people because

33:08

of that, the symphony of

33:10

eyes go wide and he

33:12

slowly turns around court for

33:15

gelatinous cube. Okay folks, just

33:17

a copy of that fact

33:19

And then all at once

33:21

the cubes morphs through the

33:23

slack in the stage. Now

33:38

back to the. Products

33:43

Panic. Every body begins

33:45

to fall over themselves to get out

33:48

of the teams pass as it begins

33:50

to slowly resource at least. idriss

33:53

around him in danger and then

33:55

throws his right hand the sun

33:58

has who threaten me with He

34:00

chants a few words in elvish, Verei

34:03

cala ignos, Then,

34:05

Fours his fingertips light up as

34:08

he casts Scorching Ray at third

34:10

level towards this gelatinous cube. Roll

34:13

your attacks. Four

34:19

hits. Roll your damage. 30

34:22

points of fire damage. As it is

34:25

engulfed in fire, the still-reforming gelatinous

34:27

cube seems to shrivel and shrink

34:29

away from the blistering heat. Timpani

34:31

dashes towards the wooden chairs and

34:33

dives behind one, attempting to hide.

34:35

Roll a stealth check. Timpani

34:39

disappears behind a barrel, hiding effectively.

34:43

Frog rushes towards this

34:45

gelatinous cube, eyes

34:47

open and analyzing. She strikes

34:49

at the creature with a

34:51

deft punch and kick, and

34:53

she channels her key into

34:55

a third punch. Roll

34:57

three attacks. Three

35:04

hits. Roll your damage. 31

35:07

damage. After unleashing

35:09

a flurry of blows, Frog uses what

35:11

she has picked up from her hits

35:13

to discern information about this creature that

35:16

she has never experienced before. As

35:18

Frog strikes this massive cube, she

35:21

searches for her vulnerability and finds

35:23

none. The

35:25

cube suddenly heads towards the massive

35:28

sand full of ornate

35:30

cheese, rich oranges and

35:32

yellows, and begins to knock them

35:34

into itself. The cheeses

35:36

begin to dissolve as soon as they

35:38

enter within the cube, and you see

35:41

that this cube is heading directly through

35:43

the market. At the far end of

35:45

this cube's trajectory, about 45

35:47

feet away, you see

35:49

Captain Horselast, with a trident in

35:51

both hands, standing stalwart in front

35:54

of his prized catch. You're

35:56

not gonna take old Bertha from

35:59

Mickey Horselast's collar. then that's for

36:01

sure what the cube clearly has.

36:03

Other instances as access to little

36:05

peaks form within the queue as

36:08

his arms or out stretching towards

36:10

the pungent fish. Or Osiris

36:12

trials have a pair from her cell

36:14

the bulls and help Griffins and fan

36:17

of before she has had, she's going

36:19

to stand behind her. She darts one

36:21

devil aside towards the feral and says

36:23

do something, people are going to die

36:26

and then she dresses. Forward and a

36:28

quick most and striking out with her

36:30

a Pierre Rolland attack. Twenty

36:32

five hits role damage. Twelve

36:36

The Rapier Pierce's this message for

36:38

jelly and as it's more fun

36:40

else, some loose liquid with an

36:42

awkward stance spills over the cobblestone.

36:44

Thera pulls out to sword sore.

36:47

feeling the familiar grip she means

36:49

the confidence to. Run. For the

36:51

veins in her arms globe bright

36:54

red and her blade. Catch

36:56

fire as she swings three

36:58

time with her so. Twenty

37:01

Three. Mine twenty

37:03

Season and nine his as

37:05

the queue makes no moved

37:07

to avoid the slashing swords.

37:11

Fourteen Piercing Damage Twelve.

37:13

Fire damage for a total of

37:15

twenty six damage. The cube is

37:17

now blowing and iridescent yellow and

37:19

orange as the cheese is melted

37:21

within begin to color. The entire

37:24

team is still wonders for was

37:26

leaving a six windy trail behind

37:28

it. Written gazes at the moving

37:30

q and then looked sounds. Aims

37:34

is full Fingertips Was asked you to

37:36

cost scorching ray yes again as third

37:38

less. Is. Hop.

37:47

Over his role your dish. Or

37:51

see what voices? Find

37:53

another massive blast. From

37:56

the and it seems to bring

37:59

in size. Jelly burns away

38:01

into the air. Increasing that accurate

38:03

ammonia stance on have worked very

38:05

hard. On that seen as a

38:08

soup has not slowed down. As

38:10

secretary towards the fish man Sauce

38:13

decides to strike the creature

38:15

in a way that might

38:17

stand it. Role in the tenth. Sixteen.

38:21

Eight Damage fraud froze business is

38:24

a lightness to attempting to spend

38:26

it. Was a

38:28

gelatinous cube, resist the something

38:30

a specific and then it's

38:32

rise to engulf frog. He

38:35

stands adjacent make a dexterity

38:37

season of rum for class,

38:39

just barely escaping the rush.

38:41

things really Frog avoiding be

38:43

golfing. The

38:50

cube moves forward, plowing through the street

38:52

at a diagonal angle, moving into the

38:55

statue of the founder of him Bill

38:57

would all sit. Campbell was adorned with

38:59

fruity cakes and pastries. Around the statue

39:02

is an offer the statues consume. Any

39:04

begins to float inside the gelatinous view

39:06

as all the takes his off and

39:09

De Vere spills is that nasty snow.

39:11

Once again, the inside is a cube,

39:13

is now a swirling array of thinks

39:16

read yellows and oranges and a very

39:18

enthusiastic hassling. Man giving to summed up.

39:22

With a little bit more drinks and her staff.

39:24

Now here at Sars is forward and says what

39:26

a way to save. File

39:29

Sit. Fifteen

39:31

another vicious. the flash and more

39:33

liquid pours out over the coldest

39:35

oh the cube continues forward. Sword

39:37

Silly Sarah. Rest is for it

39:40

in stride. Sit three. Sixteen.

39:46

Ten three, him. thirteen

39:49

piercing damage sixteen fired thera

39:52

close quarters off of the

39:54

masses to earning it more

39:56

into a misshapen spirit and

39:58

continue too much more weakly

40:00

now lunge towards the fish

40:02

market almost rolling like

40:05

an enormous jelly filled ball Edron

40:07

throws a hand forward to cast fire bolt 18

40:12

hit roll damage 13 fire

40:15

damage take this progress

40:19

over to Edron and

40:21

she feels inspired to continue with her

40:23

own punches she's gonna give it her

40:25

all 14 12 19

40:27

21 four hits roll your damage

40:30

24 damage in her

40:32

mind frogs fists are surrounded

40:40

in fire like Edron as

40:42

she makes a quick jab with the right

40:45

a quick uppercut with the left and

40:47

two twin buildings with a serious low

40:49

speed attempts to stop the creature once

40:51

more and the

40:54

wiggling jelly goes still the

40:56

cube is inches from the fish market

40:58

and just seems to freeze in place

41:01

we'll save your fish here it

41:03

rushes out again with

41:06

an 18 hit roll damage 21

41:09

how do you want to do this she moves forward

41:12

very fluidly the rate here coming

41:14

out almost like it's an extension

41:16

of her arm and slices this

41:18

now orb like cube in half

41:20

cleanly through the middle it freezes

41:22

for a moment and then separates

41:24

from itself and then drops to

41:27

the cobblestone immediately losing shape and

41:29

becoming a formless still slightly smoking

41:32

jelly timpani stands up

41:34

slowly from the chairs clapping slowly

41:36

as he does and

41:39

very slowly the rest of

41:41

the town joins him

41:43

and suddenly all four look

41:46

around and see scores of

41:48

admirers and cheering townsmokers let's

41:51

give it up for the four

41:53

newest members of the slayers tank

41:56

Edron looks around excitedly and isn't sure

41:58

how to process. That so has

42:01

the crap on his shoulder

42:03

breaks open a new floors

42:05

solstice. He's if nervously. that's

42:07

right three star know the

42:09

Crimea have because today we

42:11

have seen victory. You saw

42:13

a very top about glory and

42:15

doing. That you smile i

42:17

wouldn't you perceive as soured

42:19

is reversing me giving you

42:22

the past of on my

42:24

phone and Japan. Welcome to

42:26

the Players Third symphony poses

42:28

in a tableau sitting here

42:30

as hand of facing the

42:32

crowd and means in to

42:34

whisper conspiratorially for awful. As

42:36

he leans and sarah definitely a sense

42:39

to run his pocket. Rowley sleight

42:41

of hand, second sixteen and comes

42:43

away with symphonies coin purse. unbeknown

42:46

to him, meet me as the

42:48

outskirts of town at dusk, I

42:50

have your first mission in hand.

42:53

Let's say one more big round

42:55

of applause. Say zero So the

42:57

him over to prayer. Before

43:01

the group can gather their belongings

43:04

and disperse, Captain Horse last comes

43:06

up and says neatly wrapped packages

43:08

of fish into to their hands.

43:11

Super sexy! Me and mine for

43:13

us all day long and you

43:15

deserve a piece of Old Bertha

43:18

herself. Oh, that's an amazing

43:20

story that goes with this, I promise.

43:28

That the crazy thing to say.

43:31

Anyway, I was out on the

43:33

lake after a twenty minute story

43:35

with authored and much more embellished

43:38

details are for travelers, realize that

43:40

dusk is much nearer than they

43:42

had originally thought. and

43:45

they move towards the edge of hippo

43:47

would crossing the tree line a little

43:49

these of says alan journeying to a

43:51

bright fire life as a base of

43:53

one of the further mountains as you

43:56

all approach in on the pitch darkness

43:58

now tiffany and cool sit

44:00

around a roaring bonfire. Timpani immediately stands

44:02

up, with something in his hands, that

44:04

he reaches out to hand to each

44:06

of you. When I walked

44:09

into Himblewood today, I said to

44:11

myself, Timpani, who knows if you're

44:13

gonna find anybody who's worthy here?

44:16

But then I did. And

44:18

how? Take these badges

44:21

with pride, and

44:23

welcome to the Slayer's Take. After

44:26

a hearty dinner is eaten and the

44:28

firelight burns low, Timpani sparks

44:30

the conversation once again. Do

44:33

you guys like spooky stories around the

44:35

campfire? Cause I got a real spooky

44:37

one that I like to tell to

44:39

all the new recruits. Ooh,

44:41

yes. Yeah. Lay it on

44:43

me, fur boy. Fur boy, I like that.

44:45

See, we're already giving each other fun names.

44:48

Timpani hurriedly adjusts his seating

44:50

and drapes a cloak over

44:52

his head to intensify the

44:55

spookiness. Now, have you

44:57

ever heard the story of

45:00

the Timber Blight of Dead Man's

45:02

Table? No. Well,

45:05

you're in for a treat, a spooky

45:07

treat. You see, long

45:09

ago in the Slayer's

45:11

Take, there was a powerful

45:14

druid named Putridius Festerkin. In

45:17

tune with all the powers in nature,

45:20

but as powerful as he was, he

45:22

aboard the rushing rivers with their deep

45:24

eddies, the tall stalwart

45:26

trees with their sturdy roots and

45:29

the unbreakable beasts of the vesper

45:31

timberlands, for they were more powerful

45:33

than he. The druid

45:35

tried to barter with the spirits of the

45:38

forest, but he was denied.

45:40

Full of rage, he turned to

45:43

the forbidden magics and he became

45:45

obsessed with bringing nature itself to

45:47

its knees before him. Clouds begin

45:50

to royal in covering the

45:52

moonlight. On

45:54

a night not unlike the

45:56

night, the other

45:58

members of the Slayer's Take. got

46:01

word through whispers that

46:03

the now unhinged, putridious,

46:06

had absconded to the dead

46:08

man's table an abnormally flat

46:10

boulder in a clearing high

46:12

within the vesper timberlands. With

46:15

a forbidden text in the

46:17

druid's possession, he attempted to

46:19

enact a ritual to imbue

46:22

himself with the power of

46:24

decay itself. There

46:27

was a horrible battle, many of

46:29

the take fell, but just as

46:31

he was about to speak the

46:33

final words of the ritual, the

46:36

spirits of the forest lashed out

46:38

against him, interrupting the magic and

46:40

turning the blight back on the

46:43

druid. He was eaten away and

46:46

disappeared, never to

46:48

be seen again. And

46:51

that fateful night, nothing living

46:53

can thrive or grow at the base

46:55

of dead man's table, and

46:57

they say you can

47:00

still hear the timber

47:02

blight's horrible screams on the

47:04

north wind. That

47:09

was so good, pukes. How'd you make that

47:11

noise? Pukes is not

47:14

there, and comes out from behind a tree at

47:16

the far end of the meadow. Why is everybody

47:18

looking at me? Because if that

47:20

wasn't you that made the noise, timpani

47:22

turns and looks up the mountain. Everybody

47:25

make a perception check. Twenty.

47:28

Eighteen. Six. Seven.

47:32

Through the trees, there is a

47:34

loud booming sound, and the forest

47:36

is suddenly illuminated with a soft

47:38

violet light. And then

47:41

Farah and Idran look

47:43

behind them and notice. It's

47:46

coming down in the wake of

47:48

an enormous avalanche. Everybody

47:51

run! The

48:05

ReaSlire's take is a metapigeon production in

48:07

partnership with and distributed by Critical

48:09

Role Productions, developed in association with

48:12

Hero Club. Game mastered

48:14

and produced by George Pramivira

48:16

and Mick Williams. Featuring, Mick

48:18

Williams as Tiffany Guff, George

48:20

Pramivira as Pougs, Jasmine Villar

48:22

as Hira Agmehart, Jasmine Chung

48:24

as Farrah, Jasper Cartwright

48:26

as Edran Shadowstep, and Caroline Lux

48:29

as Mrog. Also featuring,

48:31

Hannah Fegerbocki as The Grocer and

48:33

Matthew McCollum as Derek the Accountant.

48:35

Thanks for listening and we'll see you next

48:37

time. Being

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