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Episode 135: Fulfillment written by Vali Chandrasekaran (Modern Family, 30 Rock)

Episode 135: Fulfillment written by Vali Chandrasekaran (Modern Family, 30 Rock)

Released Thursday, 21st December 2023
Good episode? Give it some love!
Episode 135: Fulfillment written by Vali Chandrasekaran (Modern Family, 30 Rock)

Episode 135: Fulfillment written by Vali Chandrasekaran (Modern Family, 30 Rock)

Episode 135: Fulfillment written by Vali Chandrasekaran (Modern Family, 30 Rock)

Episode 135: Fulfillment written by Vali Chandrasekaran (Modern Family, 30 Rock)

Thursday, 21st December 2023
Good episode? Give it some love!
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Episode Transcript

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0:00

["You Love a Thing"] You

0:02

love a thing and no

0:04

one picked up your thing And so you

0:06

bury the thing that's not the end of

0:09

the thing Don't you

0:11

let jazz yet there's a

0:13

spooky surprise And the group

0:15

cannot revise it The book

0:17

never really dies ["You

0:24

Love a Thing"] You get by the

0:26

society ["You Love

0:28

a Thing"] Welcome

0:37

to Dead Pilot Society, the show that

0:39

takes comedy pilots from A-list writers that

0:41

were sold and developed at networks and

0:43

streamers but never produced. It gives them

0:45

the table reads they never got a

0:47

chance to have. I am Andrew Reich,

0:49

the creator and host of Dead Pilot

0:51

Society. And we have got a rare

0:53

live Dead Pilot Society show coming up

0:55

in January and it's gonna be a

0:57

good one. The show is

0:59

Sunday, January 21st from 3

1:02

to 5 at the Elysian Theatre. And

1:05

there will be readings of two great

1:07

scripts, Principal by Open Mike Eagle

1:09

and Mike Benner, and You're Only

1:11

Young Twice by Tommy Johnigan. Cast

1:14

are still coming together but these

1:16

are two really, really funny scripts.

1:19

Go to elysiantheatre.com for tickets.

1:22

That's theatre with an er

1:25

and not a re. You'll want

1:28

to be there. Our pilot this

1:30

month comes from Valli Chandra Sakaran

1:33

whose jealousy-inducing resume includes

1:36

My Name is Earl, 30 Rock

1:38

and Modern Family. The

1:40

show is called Fulfillment and it's a workplace

1:42

comedy about a bunch of co-workers at an

1:44

Amazon-type fulfillment center. It's about

1:47

maintaining your humanity in a

1:49

dehumanizing world. At least that's what I

1:51

think it's about. And what an insane

1:53

cast we had for this. Valli developed

1:56

the script with Zoe Deschanel and she

1:58

plays the lead. We also

2:00

had Michaela Watkins from Casual and

2:02

You Hurt My Feelings, Padgett Brewster

2:05

from Friends and Criminal Minds, Hamish

2:07

Linklater from Legion and The Big

2:09

Short, Asif Ali from

2:12

WandaVision and Don't Worry Darling,

2:14

writer and comedian Solomon Giorgio,

2:17

Eric Edelstein from Jurassic World

2:19

and Green Room, John

2:21

Lutz from The Real Writer's Room at

2:23

Saturday Night Live, and The Fake Writer's

2:25

Room on 30 Rock. And

2:28

a little someone, Dead

2:30

Pilot Society Regular and Maximum Fun

2:32

Podcast Host, Hal Lublin from We

2:34

Got This with Mark and Hal.

2:36

Man, I'm still sometimes amazed by

2:39

the quality of the casts we

2:41

get for these pilots. This is

2:43

a great one. Okay, enjoy fulfillment

2:45

after a brief message. Last

2:50

week, The Greatest Generation, the comedy podcast

2:52

about old Star Trek TV shows like

2:55

Star Trek The Next Generation, Deep Space

2:57

Nine and Voyager, just had its 500th

2:59

episode. And Greatest

3:01

Trek, the podcast about the new Star Trek shows

3:03

like Strange New World, Flour Decks and Discovery just

3:06

had its 250th episode. So

3:08

whether you have a task that's roughly 750 hours long, or

3:12

you want to learn about some of the production

3:14

techniques that go into making one of the greatest

3:16

franchises in television history, you should give us a

3:18

try either way. The Greatest Generation

3:21

and Greatest Trek, the best reviewed,

3:23

most listened to Star Trek podcasts

3:25

in the world. They're on Maximum

3:27

Fun. Vahli

3:29

Chandrasekaran, welcome to Dead Pilot

3:31

Society. Thanks

3:34

for having me. I'm so psyched. So

3:36

before we get into talking about this, I have to say, so

3:38

we're recording this on September 24th. It

3:41

won't air for quite a while. This is a Sunday.

3:44

We're all a little bit on

3:46

pins and needles. By the time

3:48

this is broadcast, the strike will

3:50

be ancient history. But today, we're

3:52

all kind of... Tell me

3:54

how you're feeling today about

3:56

the strike, just for historical

3:59

purposes. I

4:01

mean, I think my wife has probably

4:04

googled how to like put institutionalize me

4:06

against my will at some point during

4:08

this last week. I think

4:10

we're all going insane. We all moved

4:13

to New York and Los

4:15

Angeles to make things and we're in

4:17

the middle of this big labor action

4:20

that is very important to us. But not being

4:23

able to make those things is

4:25

making us all insane and walk around going

4:27

nuts all the time, which I think is

4:29

why so many people were excited to come

4:31

and read this thing maybe today. Just

4:34

to be able to make something and do something

4:36

created with a bunch of people who we admire,

4:39

but I'm losing my mind. Okay,

4:42

good. So if that's just me. Well,

4:44

this was sort of a picket line connection

4:47

or we were chatting on the picket line at

4:50

Amazon and I'm glad we made this happen. So

4:52

tell people a little bit about what we're

4:55

about to hear. This

4:57

is a pilot called fulfillment. It's

4:59

a workplace comedy that's set in

5:01

a fictionalized version of

5:03

an Amazon fulfillment center. And

5:07

it's an area that I've been thinking

5:09

about for a long time because I

5:11

like what Amazon, the place

5:13

it holds in our lives is always very

5:15

fascinating to me and what it means about

5:18

how work and capitalism and how

5:20

that's affecting us. I've been interested

5:23

in. And then this pilot

5:25

kind of came about actually because of Zoe.

5:27

I had just written a pilot the

5:30

previous year with Alec Baldwin, Kelsey

5:32

Grammer and it ended up not going

5:34

to series and I had

5:36

to immediately start writing a new pilot. And I

5:38

was telling my agents and

5:40

managers, I don't really know what to do. I

5:43

put so much of myself into that last show and

5:45

it just ended and I had to come up with

5:47

something new. So I said, if you

5:49

know creative people to meet or there's IP, I'm

5:51

open to having those meetings and my manager asked

5:54

if I wanted to meet Zoe and I'd been

5:56

a fan of hers for a long time. And

5:58

I said, of course. would love to. And

6:01

we were chatting, we were getting along really

6:03

well, and we were talking about our kids

6:05

and life in LA. And I asked her

6:08

what, if there was any role that she

6:10

ever watched that she was like really jealous

6:12

that like she didn't get to play that

6:14

role. And she did something that I

6:16

loved, which is she took the question super seriously. So

6:19

she said, I don't really know right

6:21

now, but let me think about it and get back to

6:23

you. And then two days later,

6:25

she called me and she said, Catherine

6:27

Hepburn and bring a baby, which

6:30

I thought was such a rad answer. And I

6:33

also had never seen that movie. And then

6:35

she started talking to me about how much

6:37

he loved screwball comedies, and she loved the

6:39

tone of them. And I went and

6:41

I watched the movie that day, and I loved it

6:43

so much. And I was like, Oh, this is something

6:47

like an energy that I haven't seen on

6:49

TV lately, I think that we would be

6:51

amazing at it. I started

6:53

thinking about that character and like

6:55

what that person might do and

6:57

someone with this like, intensely

7:00

sunny optimism, this force of

7:02

nature, what she could do

7:05

in a workplace that might

7:07

be bleak and weird. Because at that same

7:09

time, I was working at 20th

7:13

owned by News Corp. And I kept

7:15

wondering like, why does

7:17

everyone here love it so much?

7:19

Like we're working in this

7:22

basically evil enterprise. But

7:24

we don't think about that, because we make

7:26

our community with our friends and our colleagues.

7:28

And it's fun, like going to work on

7:30

the Foxlot was really fun every day. And

7:32

I was trying to figure out like, why

7:34

that happens and why people do that wherever.

7:36

And this character seemed like a really fun

7:38

way to do it. So thank you. That's

7:42

so cool. Well, let's hear it.

7:45

Let's do it. Thank you for letting us

7:47

read this, Volley. We're gonna get into

7:50

it. This is

7:52

fulfillment, the pilot by

7:55

Volley Chandra Sekaran. Act

7:57

One, we're exterior of a

8:00

bourbon house this morning. We're on a

8:02

residential street in Monroe, Ohio. A woman

8:04

bursts out of her house.

8:06

She rushes late, but also

8:08

enthusiastically hums singing some half-remembered

8:11

Harry Styles. There's

8:13

a haze on the hoover, babe.

8:15

It's only been

8:17

a couple of days. This

8:20

is Kate, 30s, voluble,

8:22

vulnerable, a force of nature. Thank

8:24

Katherine Hepburn in Bringing Up Baby.

8:27

She hops in her car and backs

8:29

out of her driveway just as an

8:31

elysium.com truck pulls up. The driver steps

8:34

out, holding a package with the Elysium

8:36

smiling tree logo on it. My

8:39

new tights! She opens her car

8:41

door and grabs a large box, ripping it open

8:43

to get one pair of tights. As she puts

8:45

them on immediately, she says to the driver, I

8:48

like your shoes. The driver, who

8:51

does not have Kate's relentless positive energy

8:53

about him, can't help but glance at

8:55

his sneakers, the one article of clothing

8:57

he has on that isn't part of

8:59

his uniform, the only article that he

9:02

chose today, and he smiles. On

9:04

the street moments later, Kate drives through the small

9:06

Midwestern suburb. It's a nice place to live, though

9:08

it was probably nicer 30 years ago. She

9:11

listens to the Harry Styles song she was humming

9:13

before. Those

9:15

are the lyrics. I like mine better. She

9:18

turns into a Starbucks. A

9:21

few trays of coffee now on the seat

9:23

next to her, Kate exits off I-75

9:25

and pulls into the parking lot of a

9:27

warehouse-sized Elysium fulfillment center. There are hundreds of

9:30

other employee cars in the lot. Big rig

9:32

trucks are pulled up to both sides of

9:34

the building. In the warehouse

9:36

moments later, Kate carries the trays of

9:38

coffee as she walks through a sea

9:40

of activity, products and packages moving everywhere,

9:43

employees working side by side with machines.

9:45

As she passes, Kate nods at folks

9:47

doing different tasks, picking Elysium orders out

9:50

of stacks of bins. She spots a

9:52

pot shaped like Danny DeVito. Oh,

9:55

that's cute. Workers are packing

9:57

multiple items into boxes to be sent out. She

9:59

sees A pair of microwavable slippers.

10:02

My dad would love those. Need to

10:04

remember them for his birthday. Finished

10:07

packages are placed on conveyor belts going out to

10:09

delivery trucks. Kate stops at a

10:11

bleary-eyed man working at a computer. Maybe

10:14

not sleep last night? That

10:16

obvious. There's

10:19

a little spit up on your shoulder. But

10:21

it's your lucky day, because I got an

10:23

extra coffee. She hands him a

10:26

cup and the man smiles. Thanks. Could

10:29

I get a lift? I'm not

10:31

supposed to, but... He

10:34

hits a few keys on his computer, causing a

10:36

short-wheeled orange robot that looks like a large Roomba

10:38

to roll over to them. Kate steps onto it.

10:42

It'll be our secret. And the

10:44

robot zips away, carrying Kate past a field

10:46

of dozens of similar robots at work. They

10:48

glide around the center, sliding under giant pods

10:51

of goods, lifting them up and moving them

10:53

wherever they need to go. Kate

10:55

calls to onlookers. This

10:57

isn't happening. You're not seeing

10:59

this. Kate's robot stops in

11:01

front of a staircase where she hops off and

11:04

heads upstairs to an office.

11:06

Cubicles, a meeting table, a big glass

11:08

window in the back overlooking the warehouse,

11:10

mission control of the fulfillment center, where

11:12

all the supply chain analysis is done

11:15

and inventory decisions are made. Kate

11:17

enters to find several employees. I

11:21

brought coffee. She places a

11:23

cup on a desk, then walks over to Darren,

11:26

30, his foreman of the warehouse. Thoughtful, but doesn't

11:28

want anyone to know it. Nothing

11:30

fancy, I hope. Unlike the rest

11:32

of our cast, who wear business casual, Darren

11:34

is dressed in a Carhartt work shirt and

11:37

boots, like the employees on the floor. I

11:40

got you a black coffee poured over gravel,

11:43

very manly. She

11:45

hands Darren his coffee and heads over

11:47

to Shankar in his 20s, cares deeply

11:49

about everything except work, smug and scoldy.

11:53

Had enough, I have to work for one goddamn

11:55

evil corporation to always have to drink coffee from

11:57

another. I

12:04

know, but it's better to

12:07

be awake and pointing out

12:09

how terrible things are than tired and

12:11

pointing out how terrible things are, right? Before

12:14

Shankar can respond, Caleb, the 30s, devoted

12:16

to the boss and himself and nothing

12:18

else approaches the desk where Kate put

12:20

the first cup. Wait, which

12:22

one is my coffee and which one is

12:24

Ava's? I picked hers up this morning. We

12:27

now see there are two identical cups on his desk.

12:29

Kate points to one. Uh,

12:32

that's yours. Uh, or

12:34

is it? Huh.

12:37

Just then, Ava, 50s, the boss, put

12:39

together and driven, blows in. Hey, Ava. Ava

12:43

puts a finger up and points to her

12:45

AirPods. I'm on a call. She taps her

12:47

headphones to mute herself. Apparently

12:50

the environmental impact of our delivery network

12:52

isn't great, trying to get ahead of

12:54

it. She unmutes herself, then, a

12:56

la Working Girl, steps out of her heels, then

12:58

pulls a pair of even higher heels out of

13:00

her bag and puts those on. They

13:02

seem to be making a big deal out

13:05

of this one species of frog. How

13:07

many different kinds do we need? With

13:10

that, she grabs the coffee off Caleb's desk, disappears

13:12

into her office, slam, closing the door behind her.

13:15

Everyone waits for her yell, but... I

13:19

think we're good. They look at each other

13:21

relieved. Kate holds up her coffee. To

13:24

the small victories. Caleb!

13:28

As Caleb runs Ava's correct cup of coffee in...

13:31

Uh, I still feel like today's gonna be a

13:33

good one. And we cut

13:35

to the main titles, Fulfillment. In

13:38

the office, at the conference table, Kate

13:40

sits at a laptop, screencasting the morning

13:42

meeting slides to a monitor behind her.

13:45

Shankar, Caleb, and Elif, a no-nonsense Turkish

13:47

immigrant who eats the same thing for

13:49

lunch every day, fill out the table.

13:53

Great. So, it looks good

13:55

for now, but I want to make sure

13:57

we stay on top of it. Our last...

14:00

item is a supplier

14:03

retention question. Should

14:07

we keep doing business with

14:09

this partner? The next

14:11

slide is a chart with many variables. Elif

14:14

reads from it. On

14:16

time accuracy, communication,

14:19

cleanliness, likes

14:21

to work out, braided

14:24

belt. Okay,

14:27

the company is a guy I can't tell if I should

14:30

go on a second date with.

14:33

Is this appropriate for work? Okay,

14:37

okay. This is why your generation

14:39

is having less sex than all the ones

14:41

before it. I read that in an article

14:43

so that means it's news which means I'm

14:45

allowed to talk about it. Danica

14:47

reacts, is that true? Normally I'd

14:50

take this up in a group chat but

14:52

everyone on there is still

14:54

friends with my ex so. There's

14:56

an awkward beast but it's quickly broken

14:58

by. We're in the yellow zone. Everyone

15:01

turns to see Darren wearing a

15:03

flowing wedding gown. Do

15:06

we all see that or am I finally getting

15:08

haunted by someone interesting? This gown

15:10

was returned by a customer who claimed

15:13

she received the wrong size. Now the

15:15

warehouse's delivery metric is taking the hit.

15:18

Kate pulls up a dashboard of numbers on her

15:20

laptop which plays on the screens behind her. Yikes,

15:23

you're right. That

15:25

air pushed warehouse performance out

15:28

of the green zone. Wait, does

15:30

that mean we all lose our

15:32

quarterly efficiency bonus? This is why

15:34

I was against the company's softball

15:36

team. We're losing focus. Everyone

15:41

calm down. Only the responsible

15:43

group will lose bonuses. Everyone

15:46

looks at Darren uneasy. You may

15:49

have to reduce your microwavable chicken

15:51

wings budget. Absolutely

15:53

not. Darren types a case

15:55

computer, pulls up some info. The

15:58

customer ordered a size 4. and

16:00

the tag says this is a size 4,

16:02

yet... He spins

16:05

around in the dress. This is

16:07

obviously not a woman's 4. It's

16:09

roomy, even on me. The

16:11

warehouse delivered the product as labeled. Someone else

16:13

is responsible. The

16:16

quarter doesn't close until the end of the day. I'm

16:18

sure we can fix this. We just need to...

16:21

No! Everyone

16:23

turns to see Ava just outside her office.

16:27

Why aren't you all screaming? Caleb's

16:30

still screaming too. He

16:36

gestures for everyone else to join. Is

16:41

this a happy... Aaaah!

16:43

Or sad... I

16:45

need more context. Look at your

16:47

calendar invites. Everyone turns to

16:49

their computers, a beat as they read.

16:51

Then there's more reading. I'll

16:54

just tell you, Corporate invited

16:56

us all to a facility-wide meeting this

16:58

afternoon, and I have no idea what

17:01

it's about. Everyone reacts, surprised.

17:04

Hmm. Maybe our scumbag overlords came

17:06

up with a new perk to keep people

17:08

addicted to ordering from Elysium. I

17:12

love the perks. Like, the shows

17:14

on our streaming service. Have you seen

17:16

the one with the guy who's usually hilarious, but

17:18

here we get to see him go around crying

17:21

and waiting to die? Darren

17:23

shoots Kate a concerned look, mouths

17:25

yellow-zone. She gestures back, not now.

17:28

If Corporate's involved, something either very good

17:30

or very bad is going on. I

17:32

need to figure out how to play

17:34

this, for all our sakes. Permission

17:37

to investigate? Granted, any resources

17:39

you need are yours. Also, make sure you return

17:42

this stuff to Kohl's for me. She

17:44

gestures towards the package and heads back to

17:46

her office. In the office later, Darren, Caleb,

17:48

and Elif work at their desks. Shankar paces.

17:52

Okay. All right. These metrics are just ways of

17:54

making us more efficient cogs in their machine. You

17:56

know that, right? This impulse goes back

17:58

to the Industrial Revolution. We hear,

18:03

I made a white noise track composed

18:05

of the different lectures you've given over

18:07

time. Chompsky. Shankar

18:11

turns off the volume on Darren's computer. My

18:15

nightmare is that I moved to this country only

18:17

for my kids to turn out like you. There

18:21

are way more suits than normal for this corporate meeting.

18:25

I just want to know what the announcement is. When

18:27

I go downstairs, the guys are going to ask what's

18:29

going on. They're already on edge

18:31

because we slipped into the yellow zone.

18:34

Yeah, yeah. Corporate's never going to make a move

18:37

that's good for us. No, no matter

18:39

what they say, we will be getting screwed

18:41

somehow. Why do you work

18:43

here? This is fun for me. I

18:45

like this place. Murray,

18:47

in his 50s, if the Midwest was

18:50

a person, approaches holding a small plastic

18:52

trophy. Okay, folks.

18:55

Last day to enter this month's most

18:57

insane item on the Elysium website contest.

19:00

Prizes $25 gift card

19:02

to the Clubhouse Sports Grill. He

19:05

holds out a bucket with entries in it. So

19:08

far, the item to beat is... ...on

19:11

baguette slippers. And we

19:13

go to an insert of the Elysium webpage. It's

19:15

a screen grab of the baguette slippers page. $14.89

19:17

a pair. 4.5 stars, 2001 reviews. Customers

19:24

who viewed this item also viewed

19:26

a Garfield-shaped body pillow. We

19:28

go back to the scene. Correction.

19:32

She takes a long sip from a tube coming out of

19:34

her shirt. The

19:38

wine-lit sleeve is the entry

19:40

to beat. On the

19:42

webpage, it's Wine O'Clock Somewhere brand wine bra.

19:44

It looks like a puffy sports bra with

19:46

a camelback tube with a mouthpiece coming out

19:49

of it. $29.97, 0 reviews. Back

19:54

to the scene, Elif drops a printout into

19:56

the bucket. Murray nods. Wine rack bra is

19:58

the entry to the clubhouse. entry to

20:00

breach beat in Ava's

20:02

office it's a corner office but a middle

20:05

management corner office she looks out the window

20:07

at the Monroe Ohio landscape as Kate runs

20:09

through some numbers cash

20:12

to cash cycle has picked up a

20:14

bit but it's still

20:16

good and the average item

20:18

time and center is this

20:20

cannot be where things top out for

20:22

me there has to be more Kate

20:25

looks up from her computer you

20:28

think that your life

20:30

is perfect you're successful you

20:32

met your husband before dating apps

20:36

you're you're never self you never

20:39

get self-conscious about what to do with

20:41

your hands when you're talking i've

20:45

got to do so many things i never imagined

20:47

in my life already i know i should be

20:49

happy with that but it's

20:51

just made me wonder what more is out

20:53

there thinking

20:58

about the future is fun though isn't it

21:00

like anything could happen a new Rihanna

21:03

album discovering

21:05

a new favorite food like it's crazy to

21:07

think that my next coke able is out

21:09

there waiting

21:12

for me to try it hopefully not too long

21:14

though you know let's skip to the end of your presentation

21:17

how are our key

21:20

warehouse metrics okay um i actually

21:22

need to talk to you about that i actually need to talk to you

21:24

about that so a mistake

21:26

yesterday dipped the q2 delivery

21:29

number into the um yellow

21:33

zone what Darren

21:35

said there wasn't

21:37

an error on their part

21:39

so another department should take

21:42

the hit how do you want me to handle before

21:44

Ava can respond Caleb Burson this meeting

21:47

is at press conference idsom research follow

21:49

a bunch of local news anchors on

21:51

instagram and Yolanda Ray of you can

21:53

raise that again is coming

21:55

to the SORT Center this afternoon get

21:58

help you think Lana and RJ Inters

22:01

are friends in real life. They

22:03

gotta be, you can't fake that chemistry. This

22:06

is great. If there will be cameras

22:08

and corporate wants to come, it must be for

22:10

something good. They always make me deliver the bad

22:12

news myself. And we go to

22:14

a flashback. Ava addresses the team. Since

22:17

the company is behind in our environmental

22:19

pledge to use less water this year,

22:21

the bathrooms will be locked until the

22:23

end of the month. Click

22:25

Caleb padlocks the door. Back to

22:27

the scene. And if

22:29

it's good news, that means the bobs

22:31

will be there. Bob,

22:33

Norman, Grey and Bland are on

22:35

the invite list. Oh, this could be

22:37

a great opportunity to catch their eye and move

22:39

up the ladder. I

22:42

don't like leaving things to chance. That's why I always have

22:44

a plan. Procedure

22:46

to learn, achieve or

22:49

neutralize. Isn't

22:51

that the same as the regular word plan? You're

22:55

making it obvious you didn't go to business school.

22:58

Kate watches as Caleb and Ava instantly start pacing

23:00

back and forth thinking and riffing. Oh,

23:03

how do you make them see you in a new light? Compliment them? No,

23:05

no, no, no, no, no. Everyone must do that. Show

23:08

them I'm a fellow alpha? No, that'll just

23:10

make them insecure and angry. My

23:12

husband still doesn't know I'm taller than him. She

23:15

pounds her desk frustrated. Ugh,

23:17

we need to figure this out. This is

23:19

my chance to get out of this two

23:21

church town and move someplace like Denver. Yes,

23:24

you need to be around taller

23:26

buildings. This is an

23:28

opportunity for you too, Kate. This problem

23:31

with the warehouse metric, that's the stuff

23:33

I deal with all day. Figure out

23:35

who's responsible and handle it. If I

23:37

move up, this could be your

23:39

office. You think I have what

23:41

it takes to be off? As

23:43

Kate looks around Ava's office, wondering if she

23:46

really is ready to level up. I

23:49

don't wanna put too much pressure on

23:51

things, but I just image searched Denver

23:53

and the revitalized Riverwalk is bananas. We

23:57

paid out, that's the end of act one. You

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Esposito here, comedian and host of Queer Eye. Every

26:01

week I get to interview someone amazing from

26:04

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26:07

community. Some Queeros. I

26:09

chat with them about their lives, loves, careers, and

26:11

more. I've talked to them

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but hopefully it makes you feel like you're part of

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something. Join me every Monday on Maximum

26:26

Fun. Today. Act

26:35

Two. We're in the conference room. Caleb works

26:37

at a whiteboard. Kate and Darren,

26:39

now carrying the wedding dress, enter. Caleb,

26:43

can we talk? Painstorming.

26:47

We now see he's working on a

26:49

list labeled Ways to Make Ava Pop.

26:51

The only idea so far is celebrity

26:53

endorsements. Blah, as the timer goes off.

26:55

Caleb rushes to add another item to

26:57

the list. Bangs. He

27:00

turns to Kate and Darren. I'm

27:02

supposed to reward myself between rounds, but I guess

27:04

I'll do whatever this is instead. We

27:09

were looking at the operations

27:11

flow this dress took from

27:13

supplier to customer, and we

27:15

noticed... We think it

27:17

was your mistake. No way. I

27:19

refuse to take the hit for this. I already spent

27:21

the bonus I expect to get. Do

27:24

you remember last week when the quality

27:26

control scanner on the floor was down?

27:29

You didn't want to bother Ava. Yeah,

27:32

she was in the mood. Her Lattice America's

27:34

Got Talent submission had just been rejected. Well,

27:37

the override log shows your

27:39

signature on, okaying sending out

27:41

all the deliveries without using

27:43

the machine. Caleb looks at the dress and

27:45

rolls his eyes. It

27:47

wasn't a quality control error. That

27:49

gown isn't a woman's size for you dorks.

27:52

Yes, it is. Look at the tag. I

27:54

am. This is a man's size for.

27:57

This gown isn't Vera Wang. It's... Very

28:00

Wang? Atlantis premiere drag

28:03

queen costume ree? Does

28:05

that mean I'm a size two? That

28:07

was nice. Kate grabs the

28:09

dress, confirming Caleb is correct. Look,

28:12

the mistake wasn't mine, so I can't take the

28:14

metric stick, which means I don't have to return

28:16

to that bonsai tree I already bought and

28:18

killed. Oh,

28:21

thank God. Somebody messed

28:23

up, and I have to figure out who it was. But

28:25

I'm not ready to screw anyone over. Well,

28:28

if you don't do anything, you'll be screwing me

28:30

over. Oh, I hate

28:32

choosing between my friends. This is what

28:34

Ava does all day. OK,

28:37

if it's not Caleb, whose fault could

28:39

it be? Let's

28:41

back up the order of events. Pull up the

28:44

item on the website. Darren types

28:46

on his phone, pulling up the Very Wang dress

28:48

on the Elysium mobile app. Huh,

28:50

look at that. The

28:52

dress is mislabeled on the site. It's listed

28:54

under women's clothing instead of men's. So

28:59

the responsibility for this error lies

29:01

with whoever is in charge of

29:03

item classification. Isn't classification

29:05

automated? Who writes those

29:07

programs? Realizing Kate

29:09

and Caleb simultaneously look into

29:12

the main office area, directly

29:14

at Shankar. Oh,

29:16

hell yes. A chance

29:18

to scold the scolder. We

29:20

go to a flashback in the break room.

29:23

Kate, Darren, Caleb, Murray, and Ella eat lunch

29:25

having fun. Darren pulls some chicken wings out

29:27

of the microwave. Is

29:29

there anyone better than Tom Cruise? I

29:32

mean, the new top gun. He

29:34

clocks a nervous look on his audience's

29:36

faces and follows their eyes to see

29:39

Shankar happily approaching down the hallway. Do

29:42

some people think the movie was nationalistic

29:44

propaganda? No. We

29:47

can't let him stop our fun. Get rid

29:49

of the last chair. The group

29:51

springs into action. Caleb opens a window. Darren

29:53

grabs the chair. Ella shoves it outside. Everyone

29:56

rushes back to their seats just as Shankar

29:58

enters the room. And speed

30:00

to they pull it off. Then Shankar

30:02

just shrugs and leans against the counter

30:04

opening up his bento box lunch which

30:06

is somehow are so annoying. What's

30:09

that? The our. Tvs, It and

30:12

you. This without thing. Silence.

30:14

Everyone struggles not to take the

30:16

bait until Kate. Yeah.

30:21

Let's. Get into. We. Go back to

30:23

the scene. Everyone's where we left them. Is.

30:26

This what moral superiority is I

30:28

I I can't wait to use

30:30

it to cross M. Gap.

30:32

A Yelp from down the hall. If one looks

30:34

to find Murray, haven't come around the corner and

30:37

now face to face with an image of a

30:39

large Asian man staring daggers That him. Older

30:42

asian man wall decals. That.

30:44

Trophy as mine. And. We cut to

30:46

the Elysium web page. These are all real

30:48

items that can be found on Amazon. This

30:51

one the older Asian men wall decals cost

30:53

the weird price of twenty eight dollars and

30:55

sixty three cents and has a hundred and

30:57

sixty five five star ratings back in the

30:59

scene. daring drop the print out of his

31:02

item into Murray's Bucket Keep. Can't help but

31:04

laugh as Eva comes out of her office.

31:07

Told. Lf Caleb I need you downstairs.

31:09

She. Blows out the door, the others

31:11

fall. Oh, and the warehouse floor.

31:13

Moments later, Kate, Ever, Caleb, and Lf

31:16

rummaged through a tall pod filled

31:18

with yellow been of lithium.com goods. Kate

31:20

pulls out a pair of stylish

31:22

earrings. Oh. A

31:24

decent the process rather than

31:26

lox and bobs. Now you're

31:28

middle management. Material up for

31:30

middle management. Now. Beautiful.

31:34

She tosses the earrings back into the been. I

31:36

need stuff that makes me look like

31:38

a ruthless businesswoman instead of a man

31:40

who shops at outlet malls while eating

31:42

soft pretzels. And see step. On

31:45

can we talk about how this is the way I find

31:47

out you don't like any other suggestions on my list. L

31:50

Grub two boxes from upon. All.

31:52

Set look like a woman from

31:54

a government poster. Were. all

31:56

gray and make your eyes to

31:58

different colors one blue one green

32:02

go on and you need perfume

32:05

something for you not them

32:07

the confidence will be a

32:09

loo ring Wow

32:13

this is the best seduction advice I've ever heard

32:16

I gotta talk to you before date yeah

32:18

my father had two families I learned

32:20

from the best what's

32:23

the most powerful perfume

32:26

Eva spots a bottle in a

32:28

nearby bin as she reaches for it one

32:30

of the Roomba like orange fulfillment floor robots

32:32

slides on slides under the pod lifts and

32:35

whisks it away Eva chases in

32:41

the office later Kate catches up with Darren they

32:43

start toward Shankar who works at his desk I

32:46

stopped by HR while you were gone I wanted

32:48

to know the meanest thing I can say without

32:50

getting fired hmm if

32:53

corporate is going to be watching this press conference this

32:56

is my chance to speak truth to

32:58

actual power to confront the very people

33:00

who created this mess and make them

33:02

face what they have wrought sounds like

33:05

an amazing opportunity yeah

33:07

the only question is what to say

33:10

something about climate change the

33:12

dehumanizing nature of capitalism or

33:15

or or maybe I elevate

33:17

an ignored issue like soil

33:20

erosion Kate does

33:22

a hairpin turn suddenly starts walking in the

33:25

other direction Darren goes after her I

33:29

can't do this why

33:31

Eva thinks I can it's no

33:33

problem I'll do it no

33:36

no Shankar is too good of a

33:38

soul he wants to do the difficult

33:40

work to make the world a better

33:42

place don't we need more of

33:44

that what this

33:46

is a great opportunity to give him a taste of

33:49

his own medicine plus this is actually

33:51

his fault it's all lined

33:53

up to be very satisfying

33:56

it would destroy him to

33:58

know He. Put a

34:01

men stress in the women's

34:03

section. sadder him to his

34:05

core. Exactly where on

34:07

the same page why we're over

34:10

water? What are we arguing about?

34:12

I'm sorry. All

34:14

I'm ever going to do is

34:17

put a hashtag and racism square

34:19

up on Instagram. I need people

34:21

like Sean car to to the

34:23

rest. We. Need to figure out something

34:25

else. Serious. The and

34:27

I'm I'm so mad right now

34:30

my head is buzzing. Wait. A

34:33

year that says, They look around, there's

34:35

definitely a real buzzing. What is that? Sinker

34:37

turns to Murray. Oh Merman, I

34:39

forgot to tell you. Got. My

34:42

entry. He. Holds a big love covered

34:44

in. Sistine. Hundred

34:46

live ladybugs. On. The Leave

34:48

Him web page for six dollars and

34:50

ninety five cents guaranteed like delivery in

34:52

the comments indicate that that's about half

34:54

true. Back. To the theme

34:56

in Wonderful L, My neighbor uses those

34:59

to the track local birds. Sinker.

35:01

Drops his print out in Murray's bucket

35:03

and crosses off passing downs. old Asian

35:05

men. wall ditto. I.

35:08

Couldn't be an old Asian

35:10

woman While detail ah, There

35:13

and stairs. Dagger: there's a case he

35:15

just use for her to follow him

35:17

and exits from the warehouse floor endurance

35:19

downstairs office. It's more no frills in

35:21

the upstairs space but also better appointed.

35:24

Keith and Daring. Enter. Sorry.

35:29

I'm not that it. Weird.

35:33

Have ever been in yard? Town. Scared

35:35

off at. Ah, her

35:37

job. Probably just that everyone elses

35:40

upstairs soil is me goes there.

35:45

It's just. You

35:47

are like that oh boy when

35:49

you come up and hamlet that.

35:52

Like. Down here year. Are

35:56

you reading that gold? Since he grabs the book

35:58

and says that in the death. You're okay.

36:00

Can we the going to stay focused? Our:

36:02

who are we going to blame the dress

36:05

on? Let's go down the list. Alice: The.

36:08

Kids less interest in their problem. Now

36:10

she notices. A

36:13

New Yorker cartoon of the

36:15

day calendar. You

36:17

like being it upstairs person

36:19

down here. Someone

36:21

has been even getting this from

36:24

a. What? About Murray. Oh.

36:27

My God I love how uncomfortable this is

36:29

making. You know you like a. Rose.

36:31

Saskatoon. Trying

36:34

to ignore her during citizens computer he pulls

36:36

up them internal data. Looking.

36:38

At item statistics, this dress has

36:40

mostly been ordered by men before

36:42

Murray's teams that have discovered that

36:44

it was miss classified. The. Case

36:47

Not listening, she's looking in his credenza. She

36:49

pulls out. This. Is

36:51

the biggest bottle of Claritin

36:53

I've ever seen patter your

36:56

allergies. Baron. Hopes Up snatches

36:58

the bottle away and places it out of her

37:00

return. A high self. I'm. Allergic to be

37:02

here. All right. I need the pills for

37:04

when I go out after work with the

37:06

warehouse guys. Always. Had five

37:08

agra that for being cool. He

37:10

goes to close the door of his office. Deeply.

37:13

Stop all this. I need the guys to respect

37:15

me. Good. Luck with

37:17

that punk. The door stuff

37:19

just sort of closed. A

37:21

black steel toed boots caught

37:23

in the bottom. Deron opens

37:25

the door again, revealing Michael's

37:27

a warehouse worker in the

37:29

doorway. Michael is a dad.

37:32

Keep. React surprised by this info. Now.

37:35

World's could see to have an alas.

37:38

He. Celebrated conspired with delicate geniuses

37:40

upstairs to make us to

37:42

address. Where where in

37:45

the middle of figuring it out? Sure

37:47

sounded like it. He let them

37:49

sit in the awkwardness for a moment and then. We

37:52

didn't finish movie the pack stations, the new locations

37:54

and the floor and your signature to go in

37:56

overtime to get it done. I. Budgeted

37:58

fifteen man hours. So that wasn't enough.

38:01

I don't see you out there helping. OK,

38:04

yeah, fine. Michael

38:06

holds out a tablet. Darren uses his finger to

38:09

sign. Don't work too hard.

38:12

And he exits. I

38:15

didn't know Michael was your dad and that you're kind

38:17

of his boss. Yeah,

38:20

that was his sense of humor. He was

38:22

just joshing around. Darren

38:25

squirms. He's lying, and he knows. Kate knows

38:27

he's lying. So he's let his guard down.

38:30

Honestly, I think the hardest part for

38:32

dad is he knows I'm good

38:34

at being his boss. Darren

38:37

shrugs. It sucks, and it's hard, but that's the

38:39

truth. Kate can't help but smile as she starts

38:41

to see Darren in a new light. He isn't

38:43

just a goofball. He's a guy doing something hard,

38:45

trying the best he can, kind

38:47

of like her. Well,

38:51

he should be proud of you. You

38:55

really are protecting your team. Darren

38:57

accepts the compliment, catching Kate's smile with one

39:00

of his own. It's a nice moment until.

39:04

Maybe over there you could put a

39:06

classic movie poster, but like it's in

39:09

French. You know,

39:11

how would you like it if I came to

39:13

your house and made you defend your personal? We

39:16

need to focus, Darren. Who

39:19

do we pin this dress on? Before

39:21

Darren can respond, several warehouse workers hurry

39:23

past the door. What is going on?

39:26

In the office, Ava works. Caleb enters.

39:29

Just got an email from corporate, and they're wondering if

39:31

you could jump on a Zoom right now. The

39:34

bobs. And the

39:36

paws. I email the link. Oh,

39:39

well. Ava stands up,

39:41

breathes, sits back down, fixes her hair, puts

39:43

on a smile, and logs on to the

39:45

meeting. The three bobs and two paws pop

39:47

up on screen. You know what they look

39:50

like. Ava! Are you

39:52

wearing a new perfume? You know what?

39:54

Well, how

39:56

is everybody? I'm excited for

39:58

the press conference. Oh

40:00

us too, that's actually why we're calling.

40:03

We're very impressed with what you've done at the center

40:05

Ava. Finding good operations people

40:07

so difficult. Today goes well,

40:09

there may be something for you at our

40:12

regional hub in Denver. Denver.

40:16

As Ava beams, Caleb rushes over with

40:18

a cup of coffee. Or maybe there's

40:20

something for two people in Cleveland. I'm

40:23

just, I'm just kidding. Hey

40:25

y'all, we don't want to take up too much of

40:27

your time, okay? We just wanted to let you know

40:29

something came up so we won't be making it down

40:31

for the announcement today, okay? Ava

40:34

reacts, realizing something is up. Wait,

40:39

why? On the warehouse

40:41

floor, everyone in the warehouse, including Darren

40:43

and Kate, gathers around as Michael uses

40:45

a crowbar to pry open a huge

40:47

wooden crate. Kate grabs a piece of

40:49

paper out of it and reads. Using

40:53

DaVinci, the first of many

40:55

additions to the Elysium robotic

40:57

sleeve. Okay,

41:00

it's for the press conference. Our

41:02

facility has been chosen as the

41:04

first site to roll out a

41:07

drone delivery system. Michael

41:09

lifts a four bladed drone helicopter out of

41:11

the box. Does

41:13

look cool. Wait.

41:17

First of many additions, if

41:20

we're automating even more of

41:22

the processes at

41:24

the center, will

41:26

we be needing all these people working here?

41:29

Michael looks to a few older warehouse workers

41:32

worried. Based on what happened

41:34

40 years ago at the auto parts factory,

41:36

no. In

41:38

the conference room, Ava continues talking to the Bobs

41:41

and the Pauls. And we

41:43

thought you should make today's announcement. You're

41:45

so good at handling this kind of stuff. There's

41:48

an insanely long beat. Great.

41:53

Caleb runs in and whispers to Ava,

41:56

Bad news. It's drone delivery.

41:58

On the warehouse floor. warehouse floor as

42:01

the warehouse reels, Kate turns to

42:03

Darren. Might want

42:05

to take that clear to now. Tonight's going

42:07

to be rough. And that's

42:09

the end of Act Two. Act

42:11

Three, we're in the parking lot. Our people

42:14

peer out of their upstairs office window at

42:16

the parking lot where a press conference stage

42:18

goes up and news crews gather. In the

42:20

office, everyone continues to look out the window.

42:24

We'll be able to reach drones and they'll

42:26

replace us with artificial intelligence. Soon

42:29

the only human jobs here will be dancing

42:31

and nude modeling. Yeah,

42:34

maybe this is a good thing. I mean, now I'll

42:36

get to lose a bunch of weight and fit into

42:38

my interview suit. Immigrants

42:41

are always prepared for something like this.

42:43

Anyone need a granola bar from the

42:46

snack room? And we go

42:48

to Ella's house in a flashback. She opens

42:50

her garage door revealing that it's filled with

42:52

thousands of granola bars. She's obviously stolen from

42:54

work. Whistling happily, she fishes another granola bar

42:56

out of her laptop bag, adds it to

42:59

the stack and closes the door. Back

43:01

to the present, Kate pulls Darren aside. I

43:06

definitely can't blame anyone for the

43:08

dress now. They'll have a target on their

43:10

back for Leo. Right, now that

43:12

target is on my back. This isn't about

43:14

bonuses anymore. With more automation,

43:16

the warehouse will be the first department thinned

43:18

out. Can we go to my downstairs office

43:20

and figure this out? Passing

43:22

by, Shankar hears this last part. Hey,

43:25

you have a downstairs office? No. Once

43:28

again, loving Darren's discomfort and in need of

43:30

a release, Kate lets her colleagues in on

43:32

the fun. It's wild.

43:34

He's basically brazier down there.

43:39

I've gotten an emergency Whitman sampler in my desk.

43:41

We could head down and have a little open

43:43

house. There's nothing to

43:45

see. It's an office, chairs, a

43:47

floor, ceiling. That's

43:50

Dendeny. All where he's

43:52

checked out a man's secret home. It lets

43:54

you know who he wishes he was. Can

43:57

we all just stay focused? Ava

44:00

enters from her office. Oh, thank God.

44:03

OK, I think I have my comments

44:05

for the press conference. A

44:09

lady just flew into my mouth. He

44:12

pulls it out as Shankar sinks into his chair.

44:16

It's nice that we were chosen

44:18

for this pilot, right? Despite

44:20

her words, from Ava's face, we can tell that she

44:22

feels exactly the same way as everyone else in the

44:24

room. Thanks

44:26

for helping me look good, everyone. I

44:29

know everything that happens here is a team effort,

44:31

and I will do my best to make sure

44:33

corporate knows that too. Kate,

44:35

how are we doing on the yellow zone situation?

44:40

Oh, um. She looks at Darren.

44:42

What should I do? He shrugs. Then

44:44

she makes a decision. She turns to the

44:46

group. Ava,

44:50

everyone, working with you

44:52

has been the joy and

44:54

honor of my life. I

44:57

couldn't bear to endanger any of

44:59

your families and livelihoods. That's

45:02

why I'm

45:05

going to take responsibility for the

45:07

misdelivered guests myself. I

45:11

will take the metrics hit. Kate,

45:14

you did. No, it's decided.

45:16

When my divorce happened and I

45:18

realized I didn't know anybody in

45:20

this town except Andrew's friends and

45:22

family, you guys, you

45:25

were just yourselves. And it

45:27

meant so much. You let me

45:29

talk when I wanted to. You let me

45:31

forget when I needed to. I

45:33

think it's why this place still feels like

45:35

home to me, even though the

45:37

guy who brought me to this town and this job

45:40

in the first place is no longer a part of

45:42

my life. So thank

45:44

you. I'll be fine.

45:48

It's the least I can do. It's

45:50

a big moment. Everyone lives in the

45:52

warmth of it for a beat, and then I really

45:56

wish you let me cut you off earlier because now

45:58

it's way more than a beat. more awkward to say.

46:02

Obviously that's not a

46:53

to blame for the dress. Darren, come on. You

47:23

know, if they're too distracting, I can face them

47:25

away from camera. Positive

47:53

vibe out into the universe. Full

48:04

body smile. Okay. So

48:07

most people think of smiling as

48:09

something only their face can do.

48:12

But I believe every

48:14

muscle in your body has that

48:16

capability. Watch. She

48:18

demonstrates. Yeah, I'm just going to

48:20

whistle. He does. As

48:23

from outside, we hear Ava start the press

48:25

conference. Thank you everyone

48:27

for coming to this wonderful debut

48:29

for the Elysium family. Yeah,

48:32

Darren finishes typing. A

48:35

nearby fulfillment robot rolls off and picks

48:38

up a large pot of goods and

48:40

zips towards the exit. Kate and

48:43

Darren watch the robot go, hopeful. In the

48:45

parking lot, Ava addresses the crowd from the

48:47

podium. Elysium has always

48:49

been a leader in innovation. Shankar

48:52

looks at a live stream of the press

48:54

conference on his phone. Then at a cameraman on

48:56

stage, he leans over to Elif. I

48:59

think that's the camera streaming the event to corporate.

49:02

In the background, the robot emerges from the

49:04

warehouse. It speeds towards the stage until the

49:06

robot suddenly stops, toppling over the pot of

49:08

goods it was carrying, sending

49:11

hundreds and hundreds of items onto

49:13

the pavement. Among them are tens

49:15

of thousands of ladybugs. Murmurs

49:17

in the audience as they recognize the beginning of

49:19

a fiasco. Ava tries to

49:21

power through. In

49:23

that spirit, today we introduce...

49:26

A few crowd members swat at ladybugs on

49:28

their arms. One news cameraman notices swarms of

49:30

the bugs in the sky. Elysium

49:33

drone delivery! Trying

49:36

to regain the crowd, she dramatically yanks

49:38

a nearby sheet, revealing the sleek quadcopter.

49:40

Everyone in the crowd cranes their necks

49:42

to see. Well, again,

49:44

everyone except Caleb. Oh,

49:46

my biggest weakness? Sweets.

49:49

I love to bake, but I hate

49:51

working out. So I'm always bringing treats

49:53

to the office. On

49:55

stage, Ava straps an elysium.com box to

49:57

the drone. of

50:00

the first aerial delivery is Elysium's

50:03

very own Murray Chapman. She

50:05

gestures to the giant screen on

50:07

stage. Murray waves from it. Hundreds

50:09

of precious moments figurines now face

50:11

away from camera. It's somehow even

50:13

more creepy than before. Within

50:16

a guaranteed 10 minutes or less,

50:18

Murray will be delivered one

50:21

10-foot long string of lights

50:23

shaped like chili peppers. Future

50:26

generations won't understand how we

50:28

lived without this service before.

50:31

On stage, the live stream cameraman turns to

50:33

get a shot of the audience. Shankar, seizing

50:35

his moment, jumps on a chair. Fellow

50:38

workers, hear me now. At

50:41

the beginning of Les Miserables, Victor Hugo

50:43

wrote of a man twice robbed

50:45

of dignity, first by society

50:48

itself, second. On

50:50

stage, Eva squeezes her temples. Fucking

50:53

dumb people. On

50:56

Kate and Darren, now out of the warehouse, they

50:58

walk toward the press conference stage, looking up at

51:00

the sky. Come on,

51:02

come on. Michael approaches Darren. What

51:05

the hell are you doing making

51:07

the warehouse look even more incompetent

51:09

in front of the bosses? Dad,

51:12

I've already lived through one round of

51:14

machines taking jobs in this town. I

51:17

don't need another. Look, it's

51:19

happening. Kate points. The ladybugs in

51:21

the air have started... They're

51:24

attracting birds. Murray was right.

51:27

Back on the stage, the drone blades

51:29

start spinning, spinning, spinning... Imprisoned

51:32

for 19 years for

51:34

stealing a loaf of bread. The drone

51:37

takes off, news crews film as it

51:39

lifts into the sky, ushering in a

51:41

new level of convenience. And

51:43

it is out of solidarity with

51:46

all of the Jean Valjean's that

51:48

I demand... And

51:51

the drone runs into a flock

51:53

of birds, gasps and screams, both

51:55

bird and human, as everyone watches

51:58

and hears the spinning drone blades.

52:00

eviscerate the animals onto Shankar and

52:02

the crowd. Ava looks

52:05

around, stunned, until she spots Michael

52:07

and a bunch of warehouse guys,

52:09

smiling and clapping Darren on the

52:11

back. Nice job, Clariton. Unable

52:14

to help herself, Kate jumps up and hugs

52:16

Darren. The full-body

52:18

smile worked! Darren reacts,

52:20

slightly embarrassed by how much he enjoyed that

52:23

hug in front of everyone. Kate doesn't clock

52:25

that though, because she's already taken off across

52:27

the parking lot. She jumps on stage. Sorry

52:30

everyone, looks like the tech isn't quite

52:32

there yet. Until it is,

52:34

the great people at this fulfillment center

52:36

are going to make sure everyone gets

52:39

their orders on time. Relief

52:41

and applause from the workers, even Caleb, who

52:43

is still on his Zoom. Yeah, thank you

52:45

or whatever, I don't care anymore. And

52:48

he hangs up. And

52:50

what's more, the warehouse robots also

52:52

messed up the drive. All

52:55

the employees, upstairs and downstairs cheer. In

52:58

the parking lot at dusk, the end of

53:00

the day, our entire team heads to their cars.

53:02

Kate turns to Ava. What

53:05

a wild day. Sorry

53:08

Denver isn't going to work

53:10

out for you Ava. Yeah, because of those robots and stuck

53:12

here longer. Looks

53:15

like they screwed you out of

53:17

a promotion too. They share a moment, both happy with how

53:19

things worked out. But seeing no reason

53:21

to say it. What's everyone doing tonight? Nothing

53:24

special. Yeah, same.

53:28

They all just stand there. It's obviously time

53:30

to go home, yet nobody's quite ready to.

53:32

Something catches Kate's eye. What's that?

53:36

She walks over to the part of the parking lot where

53:38

the pot of items spilled over during the press conference. There's

53:43

one interesting item from the bunch strewn all over the pavement. Almost

53:45

all of it pixelated. Kate picks up the box. Oh

53:48

my god. And

53:50

we go to the Elysium webpage. Infant

53:53

circumcision. trainer,

54:00

white. The accompanying product

54:02

photo is of a small plastic

54:04

groin area accompanied by five replacement

54:06

white penis tips. Again this

54:09

is real and it's currently sold out on

54:11

Amazon. Three stars. Back

54:13

to the scene, Kate raises the item into the

54:16

air. The

54:19

Berserk fulfillment robot won

54:22

the trophy. And it

54:24

can't use the gift card. So it

54:26

looks like we have a $25 head

54:29

start on our tab at the Clubhouse

54:31

Sports Grill tonight. Here's

54:33

Darren slips a pill out of his pocket into

54:35

his mouth. I'll drive the delivery

54:38

van and drop everyone off. There's

54:40

ad-libbed excitement as everyone piles into an Elysium

54:42

van. The Harry Styles song from the beginning

54:44

starts and as the song builds, Darren pulls

54:46

the van out of the lot, our whole

54:49

team heading off together, ready to keep hanging

54:51

out after this long day. Maybe not

54:53

a family but something intimate for sure.

54:58

Just a heads up after two drinks. I'm

55:00

gonna do my full speech for you guys. No

55:02

interruptions. And that's the end

55:05

of Act 3. We're in the tag in the

55:07

kitchen. Kate and Darren eat a snack. I know

55:11

I promise you this but I feel

55:13

bad. The dress was his fault and

55:15

we let him off the hook. I deserve this. He

55:18

gestures at the open doorway. Kate sighs,

55:20

calls out. Could

55:25

anyone explain Formula One to me? From

55:27

his desk, Shankar rushes towards the kitchen.

55:30

I don't know where to start but

55:32

let's start here. F1 racing is a

55:35

truly international sport. That's right. I

55:37

said sport. Just as he

55:39

reaches the threshold, thump Shankar smashes

55:41

into an invisible wall, crumpling to

55:43

the ground. On the

55:45

Elysium webpage, there are two screenshots. One

55:48

for a custom-cut plexiglass sheet and

55:51

another for a two-pack of perfect

55:53

glass cleaner. Moments

55:56

like this or what make it all worth it.

56:00

That's the end of the episode. I

56:07

hope you enjoyed and were fulfilled by that.

56:09

Come back next week to hear my interview

56:11

with Vali. Dead Pilot Society

56:13

is produced by me and my co-producer Ben

56:15

Blacker and our associate producer Noah Finling. It

56:18

is masterfully edited and mixed by Jordan Katz.

56:20

If you like this show, tell a friend.

56:23

Tell a friend, please. Tell

56:26

a friend about this incredible cast that we had. Tell

56:28

them to check it out. Also, please leave us a

56:30

review on Apple Podcasts.

56:33

Follow us on social media. Get

56:35

your tickets. Go to elysiantheatre.com and

56:37

get your tickets for the live show in January.

56:41

Until next time, be kind to yourself.

56:44

Please be kind to others. I'm

56:46

Andrew Reich. I'm wishing you

56:48

a very happy holiday. And thank you

56:50

for listening. Maximum

56:53

fun. A worker-owned network. Of

56:56

artist-owned shows. Supported directly by

56:59

you.

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