0:00

Ben, have you started eating Jats the moment we started

0:02

recording? The very second I waited till you

0:04

hit that button, and then I popped them in my gob.

0:07

First, the bad news. The

0:09

world is no longer habitable

0:11

to human life. Now for the

0:14

good news. Your new life

0:16

starts today.

0:24

You have all passed your first

0:27

night at the end and conclusion of your first successful

0:29

mission back in the barracks of

0:31

your home sector CYN. Sleep

0:35

comes with it, certain privileges. You all get a wonderful

0:37

night's sleep, some horrifying memories of times

0:39

clones past have died. But you also

0:42

all regain a point of Moxie. And

0:44

in the night also a medbot comes

0:47

by and heavily sedates you

0:49

but also injects you with a

0:51

series of highly experimental healing

0:53

isotopes. Which

0:54

bring anyone who is injured or

0:57

harmed back to full health.

0:59

So congratulations. Were you saying we regain

1:01

some Moxie as well Dave? One point of Moxie. How

1:04

are you going on the Moxie? I have, with

1:06

that healing, I now have three points

1:08

of Sandby remaining. Alright, well that's...

1:11

And when I lose my sanity, I guess

1:13

we're all

1:14

keen to find out what happens then. We're

1:16

all keen to find out. We're also upping the stakes

1:18

a little bit and we're introducing another paranoia rule from this session

1:20

onwards. Now if the computer, if you roll that computer

1:23

dice, you get a six, no matter

1:25

what the computer says you also lose a point of Moxie. Because

1:27

you are starting to realise that the computer is

1:30

not as helpful as it intends to be. The

1:32

computer's trying to send us insane Dave. The computer's

1:34

not trying to send you insane, the computer's trying to help Alpha

1:36

Complex. Right, and the computer is incidentally sending

1:38

us insane. The computer is incidentally insane.

1:41

I feel like this is actually a wonderful

1:43

analogy for our relationship

1:44

with you Dave. Yeah, it's certainly a wonderful

1:47

analogue to the relationship between you

1:49

and me in a certain direction, I agree

1:51

with that. So,

1:53

in the morning, you all come out

1:55

of your heavily

1:56

sedated states and find yourselves in

1:58

the luxurious city of Sandby. six bed dormitory

2:01

that has been assigned to you as infrareds

2:03

you slept in a sleeping bay of 200 pods.

2:06

So a dorm with just five bunk mates

2:08

is a rare privilege only afforded to troubleshooters.

2:11

So who's there in the morning? Oh yeah,

2:13

client C, me. Obviously,

2:16

Bofco, Bofcon. Bofcon, our Bofco.

2:19

Strawberry. Strawberry. Is Lonnie there? No,

2:21

Lonnie has gone back now. The Big Brother Project has concluded

2:24

and Lonnie has disappeared. So as

2:26

you open up the paste, a

2:28

neutrino paste tube and a healthy

2:30

slurry of delicious additives are poured

2:33

down into your balls to make your breakfast.

2:35

As you share the communal dorm, toothbrush, you have

2:37

a chance at last to talk

2:39

to each other. We have one toothbrush between all

2:41

of us. There are shortages in sector CYN. Well,

2:45

I forgot my voice.

2:46

I forgot my voice. Yeah, you're gonna enjoy this, Tom. You

2:48

can learn some voices. Just say Portia,

2:50

these are

2:51

some high class games. Portia,

2:54

these are some high class, okay.

2:57

Okay. You guys can say typical English, but

2:59

I hear like a Sam Slade hard-boiled detective.

3:02

It was down here. It was where it was. A little

3:04

bit David Lynch.

3:05

Yeah, okay. I'd

3:07

like to go first on the toothbrush if I may. I've

3:09

really gotta settle on what my

3:12

accent is. It

3:13

was British for a bit. It is

3:15

British, but then it's been wildly careening

3:18

between sort of Oliver

3:20

Twist and the Queen.

3:22

I know your majesty. Between

3:24

that spectrum

3:24

relies all of England.

3:28

Exactly. like Alpha

3:31

Complex where the phonetic

3:33

tapes may have been muddled through, and there might've been a

3:35

confusion that there's any different types of- Yeah, that's

3:37

what happened to me as well. Well, I was also gonna say that as your voices and characters

3:39

change, and as you guys come a little bit more online,

3:42

feel free

3:44

to find your

3:46

characters and to find your voices, you know what I mean? Okay. The

3:49

canting process can make you sound like Oliver Twist, for example,

3:52

in certain situations. In fact, it makes everyone sound like

3:54

Oliver Twist at certain situations. Strawberry,

3:57

by the way, you have a bit of an itch on your-

3:59

and you keep sort of scratching at it, you're

4:02

very conspicuous and aware, conspicuously

4:05

aware of your

4:06

new shiny orange

4:09

uniform because in the night you successfully

4:11

applied for and we received fast-track

4:13

promotion to orange security

4:15

clearance which means that you now have an orange laser

4:17

pistol, two power packs, a power

4:20

cord which is not, it's a privilege not afforded

4:22

to red

4:23

and you also have an auto map has been uploaded

4:25

to you of all nearby sectors so you

4:28

can navigate the different sectors

4:30

in this region without receiving

4:33

directions from friend computer. Is

4:35

it actually canon that when you

4:38

lose a jumpsuit whether through promotional promotion,

4:40

the jumpsuit you were wearing

4:44

goes like looks like a tearaway suit, it goes foom

4:46

and it goes up your bum. Your bum

4:49

is a very high powered pneumatic

4:51

suction vortex. Inologically

4:53

that every suit that you could be promoted to

4:55

is inside you somewhere ready to

4:57

be. If a

4:59

scientist cuts you in half like rings they can

5:02

work out what security clearance you've been.

5:04

It's inside you all along. That

5:06

also suggests that as a precaution all

5:08

jumpsuits in Alpha Complex are actually

5:11

tearaway jumpsuits down a central seam which

5:14

is something to be wary of because that could be

5:16

triggered at any moment.

5:16

Just munching down on my red

5:18

neutrino paste, can't help but notice my old friend

5:20

that you've got some orange paste

5:23

there. Do you mind if I have a little tipple?

5:25

That's

5:28

true actually overnight a little droid,

5:30

a little drone came into the barracks

5:33

and installed a

5:34

second valve that has a sign above

5:36

it that says strawberry

5:38

only in a big old orange letters

5:40

and out of it comes the most delicious orange

5:43

slurry. It tastes like oranges,

5:45

it tastes like pumpkin, it tastes

5:47

like turkey that's been dyed orange.

5:50

It tastes it tastes weirdly like

5:52

butter menthols and it's all mixed together.

5:55

It's like pumpkin spice? Yeah

5:57

yeah it tastes like pumpkin spice and to some

6:00

One of you who until recently, only was

6:02

promoted to a single flavor. There's a lot

6:04

going on here. I would

6:06

be happy to as long as we do not call

6:09

this to the attention of our amigo

6:13

computado.

6:15

Understood? Yes, I do

6:17

believe I learned Italian when I

6:19

was in school

6:20

and you mean friend computer.

6:23

Oh,

6:23

hello. Yes. How are you doing?

6:26

My favorite troubleshooters rise and shine.

6:28

Are you enjoying the new privileges that come with your

6:30

new rank, Strawberry? I sure am,

6:32

but I am more eager to find

6:35

out my duties for today's

6:37

mission. As expected of a team

6:39

leader at a highly performing troubleshooter

6:42

unit, by the way, it would

6:44

be remiss of me not to inform

6:47

all of you that there are developments in your

6:49

sector and I have

6:51

a brief warning message that has been

6:53

flashing in your HUD this morning. You may have missed

6:56

it. You should click that now. Clicking it. All

6:58

right, a little sign comes up. This is in the same voice.

7:00

Please be aware nonstandard infra-peptic

7:03

venting is scheduled for today. Venting

7:05

will begin at variable not found. Infra-peptic

7:08

venting is completely harmless. Please

7:10

stand well clear of any open vents

7:12

during venting and refrain from breathing

7:14

polypeptic

7:15

particles. Thank you.

7:17

Thank you, friend computer. But

7:20

if you're finished your breakfast, I agree briefing early

7:23

is briefing well done. So perhaps you should

7:25

make your way to meet Bradbury in the briefing

7:27

chamber. Thank you, friend computer. No,

7:29

don't thank me. I'm simply doing my job.

7:31

And I'm simply doing my job. And

7:34

he disappears. Sorry about that. We

7:37

just have to watch it. Should we come up with a code word

7:39

for our amigo?

7:41

Maybe not that one if it's going

7:43

to

7:44

be tricky for you. Just so

7:46

in conversation. So what's

7:48

about a robo pal?

7:54

Maybe we could have like a... Maybe

7:57

we could have like a... initials

8:01

like an FC situation. Hello, did your

8:03

name say my name? I'm also programmed to respond

8:05

to FC. Oh,

8:08

yeah, I said your name. I

8:10

wanted to make a purchase with my credits.

8:12

Is that okay? Of course. What would you like

8:14

to purchase, citizen? Hi. Well, how do

8:16

the how do the power packs work? If

8:19

I buy some more power packs for my laser rifle,

8:22

for my laser pistol, is that gonna make them more

8:24

powerful or is that gonna just be more ammo? Well,

8:26

laser packs are a finite resource and energy

8:29

can be recharged from

8:29

any energy refueling station.

8:32

Power packs simply allow you to transport in

8:34

a more handy option. I'd

8:36

like to... Can I sell you anything? I'm

8:39

sorry? I've got a laser pistol. I want

8:41

to upgrade to a laser rifle. Can

8:44

I sell you

8:44

back my pistol? At

8:47

any production, logistics and commissary unit,

8:49

you can train in equipment in kind as

8:51

long as it is approved by your equipment officer and

8:53

not vital for your mission, in which case there may be repercussions.

8:56

Can I purchase a laser rifle then

8:59

please? Oh, I mean a sniper rifle, please.

9:01

I will instruct the PLC depot

9:03

to have one waiting for you should you fit, should

9:06

you arrive there after your briefing.

9:08

I think he's saying

9:09

you've got to go to the commissary

9:11

to do it. So, initials

9:13

are out. Let's... Can we

9:16

agree with amigo for...

9:20

Jolly good. Our amigo. Okay.

9:22

I'd just like to also take the opportunity

9:24

here as team leader just to have

9:26

an internal debrief of what happened yesterday.

9:32

I understand that we

9:34

had not had a chance to speak as

9:36

a team

9:38

and I understand that my actions

9:40

may have been confusing and

9:43

contrary to some of you. All

9:45

I want to say is when

9:48

there are others around, we

9:50

need to play the game. We

9:52

got to be good little babies and

9:57

we do not want to penalize

9:59

or murder. murdered or get

10:02

any of these stars of

10:04

treason? So can

10:06

we agree to put up

10:08

a front of civility? With

10:12

that in mind, Clancy, why

10:16

have I taken on Simon's voice now? Ha ha

10:18

ha ha! Clancy,

10:20

ah. Wonderful

10:24

voice work. What, what did

10:26

you do? There

10:29

we go, that's fun.

10:29

What did you do when, when

10:32

we, when

10:36

we left the textile factory, what did

10:38

you do? Cause you stuck around.

10:41

Well, you know, I simply stuck around

10:44

to complete the mission and to

10:46

get, I got, look, I've

10:49

got a bonus with you chaps. I

10:51

got the box. I

10:53

went, I found it, you know, and I

10:55

got it. And that's something, the computers, you're

10:57

quite pleased about that. Did you look inside?

11:00

What was inside? Did not get,

11:03

did I get a chance to look? I did not get a chance to

11:05

look at the box. Essentially. As soon as I grabbed

11:07

it, the building fell

11:07

on top of me. And you passed out and when you woke

11:10

up, you, there was an Okada reclamation team

11:12

that had been sent by friend computer that picks you up, took you to an

11:14

vermetry, took the box, but also took

11:17

your friend that you had found

11:19

away with you as well. Not by friend,

11:21

I mean victim, the person you'd electrocuted

11:23

friend is maybe reaching. Oh,

11:25

okay. So the computer had taken the box.

11:27

Taken them away and you were commended for it. Well,

11:30

I had, I've yet to be commended for it. Take 150 credit

11:32

points. This happens before

11:35

the debrief. So I got 150

11:37

points and the computer was happy with me for

11:39

that. They were, it was.

11:42

Yes, so, you know, just a spot of extra, you

11:45

know, extracurricular activity and

11:48

nothing wrong with that. Well, there's nothing wrong

11:50

with that. If our

11:52

amigo does not see or

11:55

anybody else who is, amigos with our

11:57

amigos sees. This is what

11:59

I'm talking about.

11:59

We need to keep that on the DL and

12:02

I would like to create a circle of trust here

12:05

between the three of us

12:09

What would that entail it would mean

12:11

we got a spitting each other's hands is

12:14

that what we're doing I'll

12:16

do it. I mean spitting

12:17

each other's mouths Oh,

12:21

no, I don't I don't know

12:25

I don't trust a spitting hand man myself

12:29

Okay, I mean if this is what it takes

12:33

So do we have to spit in?

12:35

Everyone's or is it sort of all is it a

12:38

we spit in just one person's and they

12:40

or is it everyone spits in everyone's?

12:42

This here

12:45

cup I

12:48

mean that seems more civilized To

12:51

see what is that we're gonna do you're gonna spit in a neutrino

12:54

flask Yeah, and then we'll all take a sip. You

12:56

know what let's mix it in with this delicious orange paste

13:01

I don't want to get in trouble This

13:03

is a circle of trust and nobody snitches

13:08

It's got the stiffy prove to ruin it side join

13:10

I'm trying to work on my layering my stiffies

13:12

like

13:12

sedimentary rock Making people

13:15

commit a crime because they need to trust you is how

13:17

gangs works I

13:19

mean, I'm just going on instinct. I didn't know that was the thing

13:21

but However, you

13:23

want to do it whatever

13:25

Can help us establish the

13:28

bonds of trust? What are the rules

13:30

of this trust? Do we have to tell each other

13:32

everything like bosom buddies?

13:41

Bosom to make us erupt in love The

13:45

little alarm starts to blink on your

13:47

heart as team leader which says briefing

13:49

in progress Look all I'll say old chapters.

13:52

It's all a bit strange to me for

13:54

all intents and purposes. We botched that mission

13:56

We didn't clean up the bodies and yet the computer was showering

13:59

us with points

13:59

So I just think it's something to keep in mind. Exactly.

14:02

Now, the briefing is happening. Let's walk

14:04

and talk or we'll save this conversation for later. But

14:06

do we have a... And do

14:08

we have an element of... Okay.

14:14

Disgusting. So you make your way

14:16

down into this short walk to the CYN briefing

14:19

room three, where Bradbury is

14:21

waiting for you impatiently in

14:23

front of Dark Monitor, which Friend Computer is not currently

14:26

on. Otherwise the room seems empty

14:28

other than his small glass

14:31

of a sort of steaming... I go,

14:33

actually, I guess it's a steaming... Yeah,

14:35

a steaming green liquid. That

14:37

colour on you just looks spectacular.

14:39

Yes, I appreciate the compliment.

14:41

It's marked down here. Thank you, Clancy.

14:44

You look like a wonderful Grinch. I'm

14:48

also marking down that compliment as well. Do

14:50

you have anything to tell me, Bofcon?

14:53

Are the stiffies better when you're green? What?

14:57

The stiffies, are they better when you're green?

14:59

What are you talking... I heard

15:02

each level you go up, you get

15:04

slightly more of a stiffy. Oh, this is getting

15:06

very close to talk beyond your pay grade

15:09

troubleshoot down. Knowledge of

15:11

stiffies is higher than red security

15:13

clearance. If you're talking

15:16

about the starch material that

15:18

makes these green jumpsuits

15:21

especially

15:22

stiff, then yes. So

15:24

would you say you have a big stiffy right now? I'd say I've

15:26

got a great big

15:26

stiffy. That's

15:30

exactly what I'd say. Is there

15:32

something amusing about me and my great big

15:34

stiffy? No. As

15:37

he says that, he looks at you and then he presses a button

15:39

underneath the desk and the screen

15:42

behind him activates and it shows a figure

15:44

of what looks like a grim looking

15:47

tall man with sort of pan

15:50

European features, strong

15:52

sideburns, who's wearing a

15:55

red

15:55

suit, but unlike yours,

15:58

it has a strong black and yellow. yellow

16:00

patches on the right shoulder. Take

16:03

a good look. This is SykesROK03,

16:07

better known to us by his insect

16:10

codename Firebrand. He's

16:13

a ranking leader of the Grey Culture Club

16:15

Scion, dedicated to the protection

16:17

of uplifting mutant rights sector-wide.

16:21

He's a powerful threat and

16:24

luckily for us, he's been a double agent

16:26

for about two and a half week cycles

16:29

since his capture and surrender.

16:31

That's right. Firebrand works for

16:33

us now. See that patch on his shoulder? Registered

16:36

mutant status. It keeps him

16:38

alive and makes sure we

16:41

don't make the mistake of giving him the

16:43

kind of freedom of movement that could make

16:45

him a threat again.

16:47

Any questions so far?

16:50

Uh... yeah. What

16:52

do we have to do to him? Oh, I'm... any questions?

16:56

What? You said he's got mutant rights. Is he also

16:58

a mutant himself? That's right.

17:01

What does he do? Does he have three ears

17:03

or something cool like

17:04

that? That's beyond your clearance, troubleshooter.

17:07

Then why turn out because we have any questions if you're not going to answer.

17:10

What's his... yeah, mutant... I mean, is it

17:12

what, adamantium skeleton? Is

17:14

it a... Laser-ars. Laser...

17:17

um... Firebrand's mutation is especially troubling to

17:19

friend computer. He has something by the name

17:21

of mechanical empathy.

17:24

Oh, his hornet

17:24

for robots. That's

17:26

not what. Oh, he gets a

17:29

bit of a stiff ear. Now listen, I'm the only one

17:31

here with a great big stiffy. Well,

17:33

he has no stiffy? You can see his

17:35

jumpsuit is red. He's not stiff

17:37

at all. Not like me. I'm hard

17:39

as a rock. Wrinkle.

17:44

Flats are disgusting. Yes,

17:47

light as a feather, hard as a rock. Now,

17:50

pharmaceutical encouragement has helped

17:52

Firebrand tell us of a mutant safe-out

17:54

operating right under our noses

17:56

here, Insecta CYN. They've

17:59

realised... they're in trouble since he went missing

18:01

and will be planning an extraction.

18:04

According to Insec, they've made contact

18:06

with a free Enterprise Relocation

18:09

Unit so the escape could happen at any moment

18:11

now. Now this mission of yours

18:13

comes all the way from Insec. He

18:16

will take custody of the Prisoner Firebrand.

18:19

Using state-of-the-art equipment you

18:21

will pose as a group of radical mutants

18:24

who have liberated their leader

18:27

and gain access to the safe house. Now

18:30

I can ask a question. Yes. How

18:32

will our Reds here pretend

18:36

to be mutants when it is above their

18:39

talk beyond their pay grade? You will

18:41

be fitted out with technology that gives

18:43

the appearance of mutant powers.

18:46

This is highly experimental technology.

18:48

It comes straight from Rand Corp which is a

18:51

hidden almost secret but a very open

18:53

secret part division of production

18:56

logistics and commissary.

18:57

Might I ask a question? Yes.

19:01

So the mutants know

19:04

that they're a double agent or they don't know that

19:07

this person's a double agent?

19:08

Is there a possibility he's a triple

19:11

agent? We have thought long and

19:13

hard about that possibility but our

19:15

pharmaceutical interrogation techniques

19:18

are near certain that he

19:20

is playing ball.

19:22

Okay. So your mission

19:24

is going to be to pretend that you are

19:26

a dangerous cell of radical mutants,

19:29

infiltrate a

19:29

mutant safe house with the

19:32

double agent Firebrand who is their old leader

19:34

and there you will identify the new

19:37

leader. You will find out the mission of these mutants.

19:39

You will find out any information you can about their

19:41

free enterprise contacts that are helping

19:44

them escape the sector and you will arrest

19:46

or detain any subversives along

19:49

the way. So we go in and we pretend that

19:51

we have freed Firebrand when in fact

19:53

we are all still working for Alpha Complex.

19:55

We go in we get information we arrest everybody.

19:58

Exactly and it goes without saying

20:00

that protecting the experimental equipment,

20:03

the firebrand asset and keeping

20:05

the secret nature of the mission secret

20:08

are all extreme priorities as

20:10

well. Did it to David Mitchell? I'm

20:13

feeling Richard Iuadi

20:15

all the way through. Dave,

20:18

can I ask a question? Do mutants

20:20

completely off grid? Like they don't like

20:22

interact with computer friend or do they? Mutants

20:25

are illegal. They are considered subversive

20:27

and undesirable if they are unregistered.

20:29

They wear the black and yellow patches like this one

20:32

you can see in the picture. They

20:34

sort of have kind of sad lives

20:36

because they are always

20:38

not trusted. They're not allowed

20:40

any level of power or autonomy

20:42

or freedom of movement. They're highly not trusted by

20:45

the society and by friend computer and they tend to die young.

20:48

Okay. So with that, there is a knock on the

20:50

door and you see another figure in a red security suit.

20:53

Yeah, sure. He's sort of like a, he's pretty tall. He's

20:55

like six foot something. He's got a big

20:58

old Adam's apple, a nice big smile

21:00

on his face. And it's just like some

21:02

nice high cheekbones and a butt chin.

21:04

Okay. Hey guys, how's it going?

21:07

Oh yes, Bradbury. I'm not sure I told you about

21:09

this, but it seems that this mission is

21:11

coded ultraviolet and is given the,

21:14

shall we say low ranking members of your

21:16

troubleshooter team. It has been decreed

21:19

in my wisdom to assign a loyalty

21:21

officer to this mission. The baby said it couldn't

21:23

go off stray.

21:25

I am a baby. That, that

21:28

was me being a Serbic. Unfortunately

21:30

due to the highly requested nature

21:33

of loyalty officers, I have had to decant a fresh

21:35

one. So this is also a red security

21:37

clearance officer. I trust there will be no problems. No,

21:40

no, no. Wonderful. And then

21:42

the screen goes blank. Thank you friend computer. Thank you.

21:45

Wow. Wonderful to meet everyone. Handshakes,

21:48

handshakes all around. Shall we? We, oh,

21:50

we've got a cup. You can spit in if you'd

21:52

like.

21:53

No, no, no, no. Cup. What

21:56

are we doing spitting in cups guys? I don't know if that's really.

22:00

He takes out a little notebook and starts writing some notes. Spitting

22:02

in cups. Now you all spit in the cup. Now this is

22:04

a matter of all hygiene when we are sharing

22:06

a toothbrush given the

22:09

availability of hygiene implements. This

22:11

is just part of the process as we go

22:13

through it. You get to know us. It's

22:16

nothing to be worried about. As team leader, I can assure

22:18

you everything is above board. Oh absolutely.

22:20

If you're going to assure me as team leader, that doesn't make a lot of

22:22

sense. Oh right. Sorry, what rank are

22:25

you, may I ask? I'm a red boy. You can check

22:27

one of the colours. I'm an

22:28

orange boy. So technically

22:31

I outrank you. Now since

22:34

you're joining our team and you will

22:36

be under my leadership, it's very

22:39

important that you adhere strictly to the

22:41

mission. Oh absolutely, absolutely.

22:43

And I will be. I understand the ranking system 100%. I

22:47

will remind you I am a loyalty officer,

22:49

so if there is any breaking of the rules, however

22:51

I outrank you indeterminably

22:55

in that way. Is that true? In

22:57

the wisdom of Friend Computer, it is

22:58

me decreed that by handing out tasks

23:01

to different members of the team, you

23:02

optimise efficiency. You

23:04

as team leader will be responsible for

23:07

the execution of the mission, that the loyalty

23:09

officer is responsible for maintaining

23:11

a healthy, friendly and fun and

23:13

loyal experience for all team members. So

23:16

I might just say a few words at the start. Everyone wants to bob

23:18

down a little bit. My name's Betel.

23:20

Hi guys. Okay. And

23:23

we're just going to be, look, I'm your friend. I'm your friend.

23:25

I'm

23:26

your pal. So just don't

23:28

think of me as like a guy that's, you know, you just

23:30

bust your chops, so to speak. So I don't think there's any chops

23:32

here to bust. Would there be? And if there was, where

23:34

would they be? Do you have chops to bust?

23:37

Have you been hiding chops?

23:37

No chops. No chops or pal.

23:39

We're going to have a spiffing good time. Getting

23:42

a lot of cop energy off you. No, I'm

23:45

not a cop. No,

23:47

no. No, I'm not a cop. Why

23:49

are you wearing those boot cut jeans? I'm not a cop.

23:51

I don't know. What was your name again, champion? My

23:55

name is Buffcon. Buffcon. You're

23:57

going to ride that one down. very

24:00

good. And he actually does rather than you. Next,

24:02

my name, Clancy, Clancy

24:05

R.C.Y.N.1.

24:05

Really,

24:07

just yes, I'm here, here, here, just for a good time,

24:10

just for some laughs, and just

24:12

for, you know, doing whatever we can to.

24:14

Fun Clancy. You can see,

24:17

because you are a troubleshooter, you can see a full

24:19

heads up display. You can see Clancy's name and you can also see

24:21

that Clancy has accrued a treason

24:24

star that is flashing. When they go up to five,

24:26

they need mandatory execution. She's

24:29

one fifth of the way to what's being so

24:31

subversive. She needs to be taken out. Clancy, you

24:34

having some trouble? Having some friction?

24:37

Just a little spot of bother. You know, I think

24:39

it's just to show it a little bit rough around the edges,

24:41

you know? We don't want to be walking around with no stars.

24:44

Do you look a little bit like, you

24:46

know, call people no stars? Of

24:48

course not. Boring, and I always say better to be

24:50

fun than boring.

24:51

That's very true, that's very true, but I trust

24:53

there won't be any more stars, will there? No,

24:55

no, one, one, I think is the optimal number.

24:59

It's like having an earring. That

25:02

is true, that is painfully true.

25:05

It's time for you all to get kitted out.

25:09

The Quartermaster has a fine

25:11

and interesting selection of gear

25:15

for this current mission.

25:17

And do

25:19

try and return it in one piece,

25:21

James. All right,

25:24

let's head to the Quartermaster. Oh, and one more thing. I've

25:28

heard some whisperings around

25:30

the barracks. People talk,

25:33

there's not a lot we can do about that, but don't believe

25:36

everything you hear and report any seditious

25:38

behavior.

25:39

And that's true, actually. Earlier today,

25:41

all of your data pads received rumors.

25:44

These are the kind of things that you heard while you were queuing up for

25:46

food, walking around the barracks last night. You

25:48

all have been emailed a rumor. You

25:50

don't know if they're true or they're false. Some

25:52

of the stuff, the scuttlebutt that goes around the base is

25:55

very wrong. So there's interperson

25:57

emails, as well as just emails from the system.

25:59

Oh, yeah, no, you actually you guys

26:02

can at any time you can

26:04

send Cortex messages

26:06

to each other You want to take a sidebar because you want

26:08

to psychically send a message to each other as long as

26:10

you're in the same sector You're in range

26:13

The computer of course can send a message anywhere

26:15

in alpha combo one one one little

26:18

team Rule that we have is

26:20

inbox zero. So if everybody

26:22

wants to take a moment to Clear

26:25

their inboxes check any messages before

26:27

as we're walking towards the quarter master, please

26:30

Take advantage of this. I Wouldn't

26:33

want to do that because I didn't receive

26:35

any messages from anyone so

26:38

I wouldn't know What that is? Good

26:41

way to be not inbox zero I

26:46

don't even have an inbox Hey,

26:48

you're too far down How

26:52

much it's good to know that you're all trusting each

26:54

other and you're trying to avoid secret information Which

26:56

is of course the death of teamwork So you all

26:59

make your way out of the briefing but before you do

27:01

as team leader you were tapped on the shoulder strawberry

27:05

Yes If possible

27:07

it is standard procedure for the team leader to receive a

27:09

private briefing Very

27:12

well see you at a quarter

27:14

We have just been reviewing the parameters of your mission

27:16

It is important that you know that alpha complex and insect

27:19

do not trust firebrand We

27:21

believe that he has made contact with sympathizers

27:24

inside PLC insect

27:26

and many of our service sectors and that

27:28

since his capture

27:29

he has been looking for a chance to escape While

27:32

the mission calls for his protection as an asset

27:34

if you believe he

27:35

is about to imperil the mission His x

27:37

color has been fitted with concealed Explosives

27:40

and a remote detonator will be placed in the sleeve

27:43

of your new orange jumpsuit just on the right

27:45

cuff Can you feel that nub? Yes. Don't

27:47

press it. Just know that it's there for your safety

27:49

Now if you are forced to detonate

27:52

the asset you will be expected to

27:54

make a full

27:54

accounting of why in debrief So

27:56

make sure you have any relevant evidence. Do

27:59

you have any further questions? Is

28:01

this uh...

28:05

absolutely not, thank you Frank Computer. Excellent,

28:07

have a wonderful and safe day and

28:10

the screen goes blank and you can follow the rest. Can I check

28:12

my messages to see if there's anything that's

28:15

come through? Yeah, you see, actually you see that at

28:17

the moment you check your messages because they know an insect

28:20

video feed opens

28:20

up and you see a figure of Dorian

28:23

Doris.

28:24

Yeah, sorry, Major Stixson

28:26

is otherwise engaged but good of you to report

28:29

in asset. Well done on the mission

28:31

last night by the way. We retrieved the destroyed

28:33

camera after the vulture strike. The

28:35

contents of it are happily, I'm happy to report,

28:38

completely indecipherable. Thank you sir. In

28:41

fact, as per the standard

28:43

order of procedure of insect, you

28:45

qualify for an extra credit bonus of 200

28:48

credits which are being uploaded to your account now. Thank

28:51

you sir, very kind. Is there anything

28:53

special

28:54

to keep in mind with

28:56

the current mission that we have been sent on?

28:58

Is there any? Let me just review

29:00

my notes and Doris takes

29:03

out a printout and he goes, ah, firebrand. Yes,

29:06

no, I wouldn't trust him as far as I throw him. All

29:08

I can tell you

29:10

is that this scion cell inside

29:13

sector

29:13

CYN has been a thorn in our side

29:16

for a good while now.

29:17

But we have reason to believe that

29:19

they are not going to continue to

29:21

be a problem. I

29:23

can reveal to you that the free

29:26

enterprise relocation team that they

29:28

have hired has been infiltrated

29:30

by members of, shall we say, some

29:33

anti-mutant operatives

29:35

operating inside the sector. They

29:37

will no doubt have their own mission to fulfill.

29:40

I suggest you stay out of their way. Very

29:43

good, sir. Thank you very much. If

29:45

you can see it to make sure that firebrand

29:48

and those mutants are somehow rounded up

29:50

and to be honest any other great culture clubs operating,

29:53

we will see it as a personal commendation for you. Yes,

29:56

sir. Excellent. You have your mission. This

29:58

is Dorian Doris over and out.

29:59

So a strawberry

30:02

races up behind you as you're making your way to the PLC

30:04

depot with your new friend Beadle

30:06

and you rejoin the rest of them. Ugh.

30:10

Well, uh,

30:12

that was a full,

30:15

uh... Disclosure? Disclosure.

30:20

I think this character is going to be a bit of a tricky one so

30:23

we have to just watch

30:25

him with eagle eyes. Now at

30:28

that point suddenly you hear a beeping along

30:30

the side of the vents and you,

30:32

um, along the, sorry, the vents along the

30:34

side of the main traffic flow

30:37

that is outside the PLC and you realise at this point

30:39

that there is nobody on this catwalk except

30:41

for the four of you. Uh, everybody

30:43

run away from a vent and get down low and go go

30:46

go! Okay. Alright. You

30:48

all see, everybody runs at the last minute. You

30:50

duck to the side as every

30:52

vent kicks open with such explosive

30:54

force that they would knock you into incoming traffic.

30:57

Can everybody quickly make, for me, all

30:59

of you, quickly make athletics,

31:02

what's called a violence athletics?

31:06

Plus computer? Always plus computer. Ahhh,

31:11

uh, no success. I

31:13

want a computer success. Yep. That

31:16

counts. Oh, yep. Tom got a computer

31:18

success. And I got two successes. Yep. Everyone

31:21

got successes? I got no successes. I got no successes

31:24

and no computer successes. Okay, anyone that didn't get any successes

31:26

gets winded and slammed

31:28

against the gantry but, and

31:30

you all take a point of damage so you all get hurt. You

31:33

take it lose a point of moxie because you got a computer

31:35

call and the computer blinks into life. You

31:37

managed to dodge at the last minute and don't

31:40

take any violence damage at all, Clancy,

31:42

but the catwalk immediately

31:44

starts to fill with polypeptic particles.

31:48

You breathe, can't help but breathe them in. They feel, taste

31:50

curiously like mint. They sort

31:52

of make your throat feel really, really, really cold. But

31:54

you otherwise don't feel particularly

31:57

strange as the booming voice of your computer comes and goes, Hello!

31:59

Oh dear, you did receive my warning

32:02

about polypeptic venting, yes? That's

32:04

right, but you know, not a lot

32:06

of time given or to

32:09

move out of the way.

32:10

It is important to not give warning

32:12

too early. Studies have shown that warnings

32:14

given with a delayed interval lead for time

32:17

for people to forget about said warnings. This

32:19

is the most efficient mode of communication I found. Hmm,

32:22

just scanning your internal systems, you seem to have breathed

32:24

in a significant amount of polypeptide particles.

32:27

How are you feeling? Oh, minty fresh?

32:29

Yeah. Pretty winded. Very

32:31

excited.

32:32

Excellent. Well, try not to worry

32:34

about it too much. I suppose every

32:37

new discovery is an opportunity to learn

32:39

no more about what things do. And

32:43

if you could make your

32:44

way to a med station at the conclusion

32:46

of this mission for mandatory observation,

32:48

I would consider it a favor and also a

32:50

mandatory duty. Do we understand? Absolutely.

32:54

I was just thinking as you were struggling

32:56

through that, that

32:59

you playing a computer that is slowly

33:02

losing its mind... For

33:04

many hours. For many,

33:06

six hour sessions over a

33:08

day. Yeah, Daniel, they're losing this.

33:11

I know, it's really, it's getting strange. So

33:13

your

33:14

vision for this, you feel okay, but also something

33:16

in the polypeptide brew that you've all breathed in is

33:19

working its way

33:20

all the way through your digestive systems,

33:22

through your circulatory

33:23

systems, deep into your genome.

33:26

And it is

33:26

activating potential dormant

33:29

mutations that any of you may have found

33:32

accidentally placed

33:35

into you while you were in the vats. Now, I have these

33:37

cards, these mutation cards. Most of them

33:39

say you don't have a mutation, so don't worry.

33:42

If you do have a mutation, they will show up

33:44

on this card now. So, take a

33:46

card. Alright, great, everybody has a card. Do

33:48

we give them back? A big penis. Nice.

33:51

Oh, did you get the sweet penis card? Now, obviously

33:54

you all probably got a no mutation card,

33:56

but if you did get a mutation, whenever you want to use

33:58

them, you have to spend one to... five points

34:00

of Moxie, the more Moxie you spend,

34:02

the greater the mutation effect. I will

34:05

remind you that visual, unregistered

34:09

acts of mutation are a capital offence

34:11

in Alpha Complex for the safety of

34:13

the residents. We all understand? Got it.

34:15

Other than the minty freshness and the potential

34:18

new superpowers, you all feel pretty normal

34:21

and disoriented. It's one of your cases, at

34:23

least two of your cases, quite injured, but you

34:25

stagger and make your way forward and

34:27

soon find yourself in front of Quatro at

34:29

PLC. Hello.

34:36

Quatro

34:38

is slightly slower but still in

34:40

his nerves. I'm still with it. And he

34:42

was demoted last time so he's orange I think now. Yes.

34:45

Which means he's the same rank by the way, as strawberry. Yes,

34:48

I'm still waddling straight from that yellow

34:50

jumpsuit that went up my bum. Did

34:53

you know that I was the one who designed

34:56

the jumpsuit up the

34:58

bum technology? So in

35:00

many ways I was wedged by

35:02

my own baton. What

35:04

was your inspiration in

35:06

that design? Well I thought one

35:08

day I was in my dormitory

35:11

and I thought, what if you

35:13

could make clothes that went up your bum?

35:16

And the rest is history. Now

35:21

what's your mission here? Oh

35:24

yes, you're off to do that business with Firebrand,

35:26

the mutant things. Is it the right

35:28

to be just secret? One of the blue

35:31

coats goes and you see

35:33

him look and then a little bink and then there are two

35:35

trees and stars up

35:36

here above Quatro's head. What

35:41

I believe that this

35:44

orange orderly is trying to tell

35:46

you is that you are on a top secret mission

35:48

for Alpha Computer where you will be doing a small

35:51

cleaning task of no consequence, is that correct?

35:53

Yeah, that's what I said. I said

35:56

that.

35:59

Check the tapes. He

36:02

picks up the clipboard away from Quattro and he looks at it

36:04

and he goes, yep, no, everything seems to be in order here. Um,

36:08

Bofcon, is that your equipment officer? Yes.

36:11

Oh yeah, that's me. And you're still willing

36:14

to perform the duties of equipment officer in a

36:16

line with Alpha complex? Wonderful.

36:18

In that case, you will be responsible for the priority

36:21

equipment that has been requisitioned. And oh,

36:23

oh, this is countersigned by Rand

36:26

Corporation, Rand Department downstairs. You're

36:29

going to go and have to pay a visit to Victor.

36:31

Okay. Um, but you

36:33

still have normal priority PLC

36:36

access. So if there's anything that you want to, oh, I

36:38

have actually a requisition order here.

36:40

And he looks down, he pulls out from underneath

36:42

Quattro's desk, a hard case that

36:45

is red and it's very,

36:47

very long. And he says, yeah, the sniper rifle

36:49

for Bofcon. Oh yeah.

36:52

There's been a mix up. There's

36:54

actually, I'm going to use bureaucracy now, Dave.

36:57

Yeah. To swap that sniper rifle for,

36:59

for a rocket launcher. Tell me how you're going to do that.

37:02

Um,

37:03

there's actually been a mix up there.

37:05

You don't, you haven't heard about the,

37:08

uh, new requisition laws that have come

37:10

in yet. Requisition laws. Yeah. But, um,

37:12

it turns out sniper rifles are illegal

37:15

and, um, you can only use rocket launchers,

37:17

but the rocket launchers, uh, so

37:19

if you've, you can hand in a sniper rifle for a

37:21

rocket launcher now. You can hand in a sniper,

37:24

like it's a buyback scheme. Yeah. No, that's the new

37:26

thing. They're buying back these guns

37:28

and you're, they're giving out rocket launchers instead. And

37:31

this is a roll day. Yeah, this is a bureaucracy

37:33

or bluff.

37:33

I would say this is hood

37:34

spa and it's, it's bureaucracy or bluff,

37:36

whichever one you want. Uh, let's go. Don't

37:39

forget you can spend Moxie for

37:41

rerolls. He's got so little Moxie. I don't

37:43

want to see him go mad. The

37:48

acquisition of a rocket launcher sends him mad. Oh

37:52

man, I'm so good at blocking. Um, one,

37:55

I see two at least two successes

37:58

and no computer. Whoa, I

38:00

um, Quattro, why didn't you tell me about this? I

38:03

was... I saw you giving out sniper

38:05

rifles earlier for earlier missions. Are

38:07

you handing out contraband equipment? No, someone

38:09

can't get a contraband equipment. I'm doing my best!

38:13

And up his bum goes his orange giggle. And

38:17

there is a little... He's clear as a sars wipe,

38:19

but a little vacuum packed. Red

38:22

uniform slams down in front of him on his

38:24

desk. I didn't design this for two

38:27

uniforms in one day to be up there.

38:29

Well, you heard him. Go get him his rocket

38:32

launcher. He waddles off.

38:35

And he comes back to you with a Pelican case that contains

38:38

a rocket launcher. Pelican case? Yeah, a little

38:40

Pelican case. They're sponsored by Pelican.

38:43

For cutting around your very

38:45

delicate camera equipment and also

38:48

a rocket launcher. How many credits is this?

38:51

Well, this is... He traded it for the sniper rifle,

38:53

so it's 250. Yeah, it cost you 250 credits. You

38:56

are. Before you take this little baby,

38:58

I've been

38:59

working on something that you might also

39:02

enjoy. For 250 credits. He

39:05

said it can't. He goes up your bum. And

39:08

he takes out a pen.

39:10

Alright? And he

39:12

says, have a hold of this. Just

39:15

a regular looking pen. No Bofcon?

39:18

Yes, just a regular looking pen. But

39:20

if you look at the top of the pen, you'll see four

39:22

switches. So, carefully,

39:25

there's a red, a black, a

39:27

green, and

39:29

a blue switch. Okay. Depressing

39:32

one of those switches will

39:35

cause the nib of the pen

39:37

to eject from the top to

39:40

come out. Is this a big four-colour pen? It's a

39:42

four-colour pen.

39:45

I can't believe I wrote that down. Now,

39:49

if you want it instead of the rocket launcher,

39:52

or on top of the rocket launcher

39:54

for, let's call it 200 credits,

39:57

it can be yours. Ooh.

39:59

this wonderful invention. This

40:02

is anybody else want to requisite

40:05

requisition anything else for PLC I will say

40:07

just so you understand him. You

40:09

could always have gotten the sniper rifle in the

40:11

room but you get a 10% surcharge

40:13

for express delivery on the mission. Stuff

40:15

is cheapest while you're at the peak. Could I also

40:18

as a med kit

40:20

would that heal me of my injury right now? Oh,

40:22

oh, Quattro. Have you given out

40:25

the loyalty officer and the science officer kits? I

40:27

was yes. You

40:30

have. I believe so. Um, not

40:32

one moment. Um, here you

40:35

are. Alright, great. He slams some other things down. Do you

40:37

have somebody who is prepared to be the happiness officer

40:39

for this team?

40:41

What is that? Yeah,

40:42

what is that entail? Happiness officer

40:44

is responsible for the making sure that all happiness

40:47

related activities are carried out satisfactorily

40:49

and serotonin. You can provide assistance

40:51

counseling and additional happiness if needed and you provided

40:54

with doses of Chiroxin in the case

40:56

of sudden psychotic break.

40:58

Oh, go on. I would have

41:00

might be that unless you want to cause beetle. Oh,

41:03

you've already got a lanyard.

41:04

No, no, I'd like a lanyard. Go on. Let

41:06

me be the happiness guy. So you're the happiness officer and then

41:08

you spiffing. You were given

41:10

a case and inside that case are three med

41:13

kits and three doses of Chiroxin.

41:15

Chiroxin, good stuff. And can

41:17

this be self administered or only

41:19

under certain circumstances? Well,

41:22

I don't know. Chiroxin is a highly controlled

41:24

substance that's used if a clone is experiencing

41:27

a total psychological break. Yeah. Do

41:29

you mean recreationally? No,

41:31

no, what if I get the belt on the

41:33

door knob and give yourself Chiroxin?

41:37

Just wondering am I able you know, if I am

41:39

the one having a psychotic break, am I able to

41:41

just you know, have a little sipy sipy.

41:44

You administer it by puncturing

41:46

a hole through the chest cavity with a 12 inch

41:49

syringe. So you know, with

41:51

a bit of you know, perhaps a door knob and swinging

41:53

the door and be able to do just

41:56

fine. Yes, this is lovely, lovely,

41:58

lovely stuff. Oh, yes.

41:59

This will be good, it's good to be happy

42:02

when we're at work. Now

42:04

I do have a question for you. Sorry, is that okay?

42:07

Quattro will answer any questions. I'm merely

42:09

here to punish Quattro. Quattro,

42:13

my dear boy. Oh

42:16

gosh, would I love some grenades? I'm

42:18

happy to purchase them. If you can just show

42:20

me to the old Grenadio warehouse.

42:23

How many do you require? How

42:25

much are they? There's 75

42:28

credits for a set of three. They come in

42:30

three flavors, high explosive,

42:33

foam and smoke and mint.

42:36

Are there any from the

42:38

BNG sector? The

42:40

BNG sector, yes. Can I just go and have a browse,

42:43

is what really I'd like to do? I

42:45

couldn't let you, that would be very,

42:48

very bad for old Quattro. Make a bluff,

42:50

intimidate or bureaucracy check for

42:52

me with the Hitzberg.

42:55

But I'm bad at all of them Dave. Yeah, well pick one very quickly. I'll

42:58

pick the least bad one then, all right.

43:04

Oh, I got one success and

43:06

I got a computer fail. No,

43:09

it is. So is that a minus? Unless the computer's a six, you don't

43:11

need to worry. Oh wait, and so I've got the other, so

43:13

fours count as a minus? Oh yeah, they do

43:15

because you're negatives. Okay, so I got

43:17

one success, two minus. You fail and unfortunately that

43:19

means that you are not able

43:21

to look at them, but you do buy some grenades,

43:24

which ones do you buy? The

43:26

ones that I want. Well, unfortunately

43:28

you failed, so you get given, but you can choose the flavor. Do

43:30

you want foam? What are the flavors? Foam. High

43:32

explosive and smoke. I

43:35

think I might buy some grenades as well, so I'll probably get some explosive

43:37

ones. High explosives for you. All right,

43:39

I'll get foam. All right, you get some foam grenades,

43:41

great, wonderful. You look at them and because

43:43

of your fail, unfortunately, you realize

43:46

that the cereals of the sector that these

43:48

originate from have been filed off, but

43:50

you have three foam grenades. What

43:52

about him? Can you look at his?

43:54

I would like to purchase some high explosive grenades.

43:57

Excellent, all right, you get three high explosive grenades.

43:59

Do I still have my slug gun that I found in

44:02

the old warehouse? I assume you didn't take it to briefing because

44:04

it would be contraband equipment, but you can duck back and

44:06

get it if you want before your mission. Okay. And then

44:08

do I have to buy more ammo for that? You,

44:12

there is no slugs are a contraband

44:14

homemade ammunition used by the great culture. Right. So I

44:16

just have, you have your orange brand

44:18

laser pistol, which has been given an issue to you for your own

44:20

protection. But I would have with the remaining ammo

44:23

in the slug guns. That's correct. Five remaining. Yeah.

44:25

And Quatro, before we go, do

44:28

I need to buy any ammo for the

44:29

rocket launcher as well? It comes

44:32

with three rounds, but you could always purchase

44:34

just more. That'll be plenty.

44:37

It comes with three rounds. That's

44:40

so many rounds

44:40

Quatro. Have

44:45

a look at this. It takes out

44:48

a thin, a thin looking

44:50

sort of rectangle about 30 centimeters

44:53

long and maybe about an inch

44:55

wide. A ruler? And he says,

44:58

and he says, hold this, okay,

45:01

a normal looking band. Now

45:04

mind this is something I cooked up only

45:06

this morning, but I think you're going to get

45:08

a real kick out of it. 300 credits.

45:12

Take the band and with some

45:14

force, slap

45:16

it down on your wrist. It's

45:20

wrapped around my wrist entirely. It's a bracelet

45:22

now. Quatro, I'm

45:25

getting a memory of

45:26

a former life. I watched

45:28

a movie called James Bond,

45:31

I believe. And in that movie,

45:33

the quantum master, he gave out like useful

45:36

items that were like the band or the pen. That

45:38

was more like an invisible car or like a helicopter

45:40

that sucks its own dick or something. You're out

45:43

here giving out four

45:45

color pens and a slap band. I feel

45:47

like next time I see you Quatro, I

45:50

want you to invent it something great. Okay. Can

45:53

I also

45:53

quickly buy a laser rifle? You

45:55

can buy a laser rifle. Absolutely. I could

45:57

also buy a plays a saber.

45:59

Yeah. You buy also a short yeah a

46:01

spike saber. So it looks like a handle

46:04

but it can eject out a blade Oh, it's

46:06

a light saber. You can put it was it looks

46:08

like a lightsaber, but the it's just a reinforced

46:11

steel vibro blade Cool. Yeah, so

46:13

you get that like the dark saber like a

46:15

dark. It's like a dark saber. Thank you Look,

46:18

you're really gonna have to move on. We've got three more troubleshooter

46:21

teams that we have to fit out And

46:24

though we have to go and see a Victor in

46:27

Ram core absolutely for our final requisitions

46:29

with the last

46:29

thing to do then is for your equipment officer to sign off

46:32

on all of your equipment

46:35

so So does everyone

46:37

now that I'm the equipment officer and I

46:39

got punished last time I'm

46:41

I'm gonna say this time everyone's gonna take care of their

46:43

things So what does everyone got

46:46

and I'll write it all down now. We're talking grenades.

46:49

We've decided what we bought Are you got given the

46:51

cheer oxen? You got given the med kits? Oh

46:53

and also there's a package of four High

46:56

highly approved unorthodox Outfits

47:00

which are designed to allow you to infiltrate the

47:02

mutant enclave They are all wrapped

47:04

in plastic, but now that you can see them there's

47:06

sort of strange anachronistic T-shirts

47:09

with sort of a kind of AI Cowman

47:13

there's like weird like fluffy dice

47:15

necklace for one of you There's sort of sort of a

47:17

strange like chain harness that you're

47:19

meant to wear over one leg the whole thing looks

47:21

like it was designed by Somebody

47:24

who's never seen a punk films idea of a punk

47:26

film and all of them are different

47:28

shades of red and orange Yes, of course

47:31

Costumes are no reason not to follow security clearance.

47:33

And is there anything else I need to take care of? Well, I mean

47:35

is there anything else I need to remember? Well, actually

47:37

we've got we have a brand new system We've

47:40

signing we've decided is inefficient. So we actually

47:43

just have this new Spiker

47:45

system over here. If you just take your hand and you place

47:47

it inside this tube Okay, we can

47:49

take an imprint of you and

47:52

that way we'll be able to file all of this equipment

47:54

as on your account And you're responsible for right?

47:56

So just so I know Michael Hing

47:58

knows what I responsible for

47:59

It's the the med kits

48:02

the cheer oxen and the outfits the costumes and

48:04

of course I assume whatever you get given by

48:07

Professor Victor down at Rand sure okay, all

48:09

right. Let's head down there Are you taking a hand you put it into the

48:11

tube

48:12

your and your hand gets stuck and he goes oh?

48:15

That's never happened before oh What

48:19

shows there an override on this thing? Oh, there should be

48:21

yes absolutely the sort of thing I can fix

48:24

and maybe if you could see

48:26

your way clear to Recommending me for

48:28

sorry, what's got caught as the slap

48:30

band. I'm wearing You're

48:33

wearing something on your wrist Oh Quattro

48:36

that's not on me I

48:40

gotta give it back to I didn't want to buy it anyway. I was just

48:42

looking at it I never took it off hearing here's

48:44

your slap band back No, you're you're all

48:46

running late I

48:47

you stay here and as you can see there's

48:49

some other orderlies and ready and infrared

48:52

uniforms They're starting to descend on boffcon

48:54

with a bunch of tools as they all start trying

48:56

to give different advice on how to get him out of the machine

48:58

and The other three of you try letting go

49:00

the can Head on

49:02

down through an elevator down a long

49:05

hot corridor with follow passing a lot of different

49:07

blue coats holding laser rifles

49:09

until you get to a vault bank vault

49:12

door the

49:13

Blue coat that was leading you takes it walks

49:16

up to a retinal scanner looks into it with

49:18

his eyes And then it used to be a

49:20

green light chime and the door

49:22

Rotates to the side and opens to

49:25

reveal a bunker deep underneath PLC

49:27

that is full of pristine Equipment

49:30

what looks like science equipment and there's a figure standing

49:33

at the back of a womb of a man

49:36

wearing

49:36

a sharp indigo

49:39

jumpsuit with a white lab coat

49:42

over it and That figure is

49:44

fiddling with something that's on a steel bench and they

49:46

turn around as you arrive Come in

49:48

come in come in come in

49:50

Almost done it just give me two seconds to concentrate

49:53

almost there Victor

49:56

you have done it again, and he holds up a four color

49:58

pen

49:59

You know this who this is, right? This

50:01

is Victor Ice, CN57. No,

50:04

not seven. Yes, seven. Seven. So

50:07

good that he invented a one-use clone

50:09

for himself, and that's how he manages to keep himself alive.

50:11

He is one of the brightest minds

50:14

of approved sciences used here

50:16

in Alpha Complex, and you will treat him with respect. Now, I've

50:18

got to go take a shit, but you're with Victor. Don't

50:21

forget to sign the door on the way out. I'm sure your friend will be

50:23

sent down soon. And he fucks

50:25

off. All right, my little chickadees.

50:29

Welcome. Oolly doolly.

50:31

I was going to say. So, he really was familiar about you. I've

50:33

seen this character before. Listen,

50:37

I have so much to do. So many

50:40

little things to tinker with, so many

50:42

inventions to invent. This is

50:44

the mutant thing, right? Correct.

50:47

You need to pass as people with mutations.

50:51

Yes,

50:51

sir. Excellent. Well, it's good that I'm so

50:53

brilliant, because have a look at this. And

50:56

do we want to do the... He

50:59

pulls a sheet off the table behind

51:01

him, and you can

51:01

see an array of strange devices,

51:04

belts, harnesses, a pair of gloves,

51:06

what looks like strange bands to be worn

51:08

around the head, things with dials, diodes,

51:10

resistors, strange electronics,

51:12

stranger devices, too, that you haven't

51:14

recognized before, because to try to

51:17

catch a mutant, one has to act like a mutant

51:19

and to act like a mutant, one needs special powers,

51:21

and special powers can be found here in Rand Department

51:24

if you have the credits to sign for it, if you

51:26

have the will to do what is right, and if

51:29

you are working on a mission for the beloved friend

51:31

computer of Alpha Complex.

51:36

The cast of this week's episode of OK Computer

51:39

is Alex Lee, Simon Greiner, Michael

51:41

Hing, and Tom Carding. Our dungeon master

51:43

and friend computer is Dave Harmon, the NPC

51:46

voices provided by Ben Jenkins and music

51:48

provided by Tom Carding. Shakira Khan

51:50

is our producer and the podcast editor mixed

51:52

and mastered by me Hugh Guest. OK

51:55

Computer is brought to you by contributors to the Dragon

51:57

Friends Patreon who get early access to

51:59

ad-free evidence.

51:59

episodes, as well as other exclusive content

52:02

for just $5 a month. Until next time.

52:30

I'm sorry. Have you guys ever had the

52:32

situation where

52:34

you're listening to a podcast and you've got

52:37

a picture, you don't know what the person looks like.

52:40

Um, and you just have an imaginary

52:42

version of what the voice looks like. And then you look

52:44

at a photo and you're like, oh,

52:47

terribly disappointed by the, the mundanity

52:49

of their humanness. Um, I

52:51

just wonder if anybody has ever not seen

52:54

a picture of Tom. Somebody

52:56

at a, at a live show once said to

52:59

me, Oh, I thought

53:01

you were the Chinese one.

53:06

That really speaks to the amount of Chinese jokes that

53:08

you make. No, no, it's

53:11

weird. That happens on Triple J as well. People

53:13

who've never seen Lewis and

53:15

me get us confused and

53:18

that, cause they'll go up to us and be like,

53:21

uh, so which one's hover, which one's hang like it's nice

53:25

in some way because they're trying to like, you

53:27

know, not, oh, I don't see race. Yeah. I

53:30

don't hear race. Is it, is it,

53:32

or someone called him nailed it. It's

53:34

a no way situation.