0:00

This. Is the Bbc? This

0:03

podcast is supported by advertising outside

0:06

the Uk. At.

0:10

Age thirty, Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart is

0:12

at a crossroads in his life.

0:15

The aristocracy of snow be Salzburg

0:17

have turned. The news is up

0:19

with the composer and the Archbishop

0:21

dismisses Mozart from his position with

0:23

a kick in them, but he

0:25

escapes to Prague the second his

0:28

carriage drive through the city gates.

0:30

Mozart over here as a young

0:32

boy whistle the melody of his

0:34

very own Figaro. This Mozart mania

0:36

opens all his creative valves. The

0:38

scores flow out like beer. From

0:41

the tops of the city

0:43

taverns. practice made Mozart a

0:45

virtuoso vitality made him the

0:47

creator of Don Giovanni, the

0:49

opera of all over as

0:51

the poet Lorenzo.ponti composed it's

0:53

lyrics from the hotel opposite,

0:56

sending them to Mozart's desk

0:58

via paper airplane. Will

1:01

work. Asian has always been a

1:03

good idea. How. About a trip

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to Prague. Acorn

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TV awaits. Bbc

1:45

Sounds Music Radio podcasts,

1:49

Radio. Is. Always been important

1:51

in my life. Ever. Since I was

1:53

child. And. My sister earner and I would

1:55

rush home from school. In. Order to

1:57

listen to Journey into Space which was

1:59

an early the highlight my radio listening.

2:02

And when I became an actor

2:05

I was as it were apprentice

2:07

to Bbc Radio Drama and it's

2:09

were anything that might be described

2:11

as training took place. Watching more

2:13

experienced actors go to work without

2:16

fuss and with maximum preparation Radio

2:18

Drama is a unique entertainment and

2:20

as much as it requires from

2:22

the audience apart from anything else

2:24

a degree of imagination which is

2:26

exhilarating and satisfying. And

2:29

radio makes certain things possible which

2:31

are unachievable elsewhere, a fact which

2:33

I hope the player about to

2:35

listen to. apart from entertaining you

2:37

will make very clear. Thank.

2:39

You. I hope you enjoy it. I

2:43

am recording this topless. The

3:18

evening and from listeners

3:20

round the world and

3:22

sepsis Welcome to Paradise

3:24

Fun. Little

3:31

the number. Power. I'm not a hero

3:33

or not. any kind of. I

3:36

am humbled zeroed in on. Steam

3:41

version of analysis and could

3:43

you stop screaming? If I'm

3:45

going to turn are gonna

3:47

feel well enough to fish?

3:49

Excuse me for think it

3:51

it might be used as

3:53

a someone says. Must have

3:55

been. Please call me of says

3:57

is just as he. Is.

4:00

The time and then why are

4:02

your initials Lg? Our family never

4:04

use the liturgy Grandfather funk like

4:06

a was killed by two foot

4:08

long g which broke loose from

4:11

a shop sign and really rather

4:13

moderate when islamist major schooling yes

4:15

especially geometry and games with and

4:17

serious as we are about to

4:19

die my time with fluttering hard

4:21

confess pardon me while I inhale

4:24

with sufficient figure for another screen

4:26

but Miss Wilkins when a mile

4:28

and a half underground who. Will

4:30

to oh well that's a gentleman line

4:32

on the basement floor one a a

4:34

press close to the board for some

4:37

reason or what about that small man

4:39

with the has over the sir searched

4:41

on the beam. hello ah no real.

4:43

Then I had assumed lack of oxygen

4:46

unfair were making me hallucinate. Seemed unlikely

4:48

anyone else be in an abandoned and

4:50

rapidly smoking lead moon. Yes,

4:54

nice was proceeding very

4:57

much as. You. Single

5:09

I I am Kennedy. During

5:12

Bill Nye. In

5:27

my lifetime. Generally

5:32

seats know and and and

5:34

now also. Have

5:37

never heard that cat noise in real

5:39

life. and terrible comedies every time throw

5:42

anything, drop anything. Me. On

5:45

very source of rule you

5:47

out here. For

5:49

me and ran off. I'm innocent my car and

5:51

bring it with me undies. a cat would be

5:54

in a man homes cats just. Hang around and to

5:56

be a dead in and. Source:

6:00

Can you he's not dead? How

6:02

do you know? Fan base: Because

6:04

because it's pissing greens

6:07

somewhere over there, there

6:09

are a lot month.

6:11

Unknown of a dies in suburban systems. That's

6:14

exactly what most people die joyce or on

6:16

a golf course in the putting green is

6:18

just ago cause when the pacific you're not

6:20

a human certainly not possess or didn't say

6:23

on was did I say mean it is.

6:26

Haven't got a to mean

6:29

us to job and noisy

6:31

Would simply use Fed. him

6:34

into a do apologize mercedes. I

6:37

mean more to Johnny Easy and

6:40

then it isn't it. As you

6:42

do know me, his nanny. Cruisers

6:45

a counter this problem and the

6:48

you call them in the Us

6:50

problem They. Could

6:53

we just do with one disaster to time?

6:55

This is all My phone is all by

6:57

himself. Her Europe is out who have never

6:59

known anyone more. Last is like one of

7:01

those cats you find under your shares. I

7:03

coached him with food but his know who

7:06

removed. For

7:08

I write his. Thoughts,

7:12

Ideas. Slapstick.

7:15

but said show except I already

7:18

couldn't see anything. Made any

7:20

to protect her demeanor. sorry. Have

7:22

you to expand. Dropped it

7:24

obviously on a cat nicht

7:26

it. It was that stripy

7:28

big tangerine one cat know

7:31

to think who was having

7:33

sex sorry Good enough not

7:35

mention said I didn't fan

7:37

I didn't know mention sex

7:39

and I apologize. To him

7:41

about autism. We're not very much know.

7:46

What I was on. What it

7:49

was there. When you can't see

7:51

everything could be anything you do.

7:53

you don't know, You know? Yes,

7:57

He didn't fit in the dark. Me to pat. For

7:59

the worst, nothing. I

8:08

mean a whole we to the here

8:10

and currently being would just outside Athens

8:12

waiting for much of grandmother speak or

8:14

to something. Nine on those. Dark pact

8:16

with instructions to school for her. Now

8:18

I'm panicking or doesn't stop a panic

8:21

and caught up with panicking over part

8:23

which comes out his worth and panicking

8:25

makes this about me and none of

8:27

this is about minutes about Ben. Can

8:29

be concerned about to didn't once you know. You.

8:31

Worries. Him

8:35

last have never known anyone more. Last he's

8:37

like one of those cats you find under

8:39

your shared. I coached him with food but

8:41

he's not only was I to try Joyce

8:44

I did have a put a foot is

8:46

fair is bread from when he was little.

8:48

Like if you can't force someone to feel

8:51

loved the. Presumptive redraw. The stay on the.

8:53

Can we just Not discuss your comes with

8:55

intimacy? Know. My

8:58

problem and and will so please just

9:00

for the ceiling for the moment. Could

9:02

you? Could you hold my hand the

9:04

an anchor points so I do the

9:07

same for you unless his. Jokes.

9:12

Sinus. None of this is I do. With

9:15

this is a speech kids. Are

9:19

listening to the radio. Smith I

9:21

love to this. Autumn

9:25

leaves, mister noise. Is pretty stuff

9:27

I feel more than and i was

9:29

most in my. Dark

9:31

get the source, went outside and

9:34

exactly that often find from under

9:36

the covers. It has things that.

9:38

We will find that reason. Alone

9:41

in the woods in the developed and we can decide

9:43

into. His

9:46

is it says his podcast I listened to that

9:48

nice and I'm trying. To sleep or these

9:50

are pretending realities not really is disassociated.

9:52

I sort of float above much of

9:54

it. Doesn't mean I'm com mais I'm

9:56

terrified. Bad.

10:01

He to answer if it was for

10:04

move asked me who are you

10:06

holding my is ill. As they are

10:08

the handles of the head. Or

10:10

you comments and. I'm not a bloody in front

10:12

of the. Having the Ls

10:14

and sentence clean some nice.

10:18

Funny like like the Goon show and

10:20

sorry I read that again. Move around.

10:22

The horn got me through my divorce

10:24

on the home. The odor focused. Yeah,

10:27

you were married. Know as get

10:29

to do it stated expensive. In. The

10:35

Karma. Coax

10:37

half hour. Some

10:40

episodes of those as east Castles

10:42

and they're made of funny. I

10:44

like static to tune it out

10:46

of nowhere and everywhere make it

10:48

up as he go along. Both

10:51

enough we listened to my brother

10:53

you he was fun at you

10:55

funny not like my brother He

10:57

told the clumps sylvester prop know

10:59

that's the wrong kind of phonics.

11:01

the almost changed it to see

11:03

says hi. I'm proud. To do

11:05

as he was funny as hell but

11:07

when he hit the stage is is

11:10

froze, self sabotage and or reform fronted

11:12

shirt. we were going to be a

11:14

double act. I couldn't get my hand

11:17

to have Club Door for the best

11:19

I pre sale is quicker my family

11:21

you'd end up with the script for

11:23

us if Sternberg and worked at button

11:26

and. It

11:28

could have here is that. Might not

11:31

a cone an ex. Who.

11:36

Don't want to wash and who it is

11:39

I was with sometimes it already has become

11:41

the as an hour a but I'm looked

11:43

everywhere else. friend

11:45

making is not in our genes a

11:47

past acquaintance could have driven in from

11:50

flooding nesta no offense to know you

11:52

think dealers would leave people alone as

11:54

knows if they'll run out a client's

11:56

the selling drugs something of which people

11:59

cannot get enough Are

14:01

there tablets? I can't avoid dying by

14:03

not living. I never have dragged you

14:05

out here. Why didn't you say? Well, at

14:07

one point I thought we'd have time to

14:09

confide in each other. Well, that makes two of us.

14:11

Simon, I give you food in containers.

14:14

You eat it, I assume. You

14:16

return the empty containers, stand it, I

14:18

swear to God, on the same spot

14:20

every time, half way across my doormat

14:22

and no further. Well, I've never been invited

14:24

into your house, have I? Well, it was Covid.

14:26

That was years ago. And people get into habits,

14:29

like you being a one-man doomsday colt in

14:31

suede shoes. I have one pair of suede shoes.

14:33

I barely wear them. Is

14:36

that him? One pair. Simon, is that

14:38

him? Ben!

14:41

What have you taken? You

14:43

shouldn't be in my room. You have to knock. Why

14:47

am I? In the middle of a bloody

14:49

forest, that beats me. What have you taken?

14:51

I feel so... Benny, what have you done?

14:53

Bear! This

14:55

beautiful feeling. Torch. Ice.

14:59

Yes, plastic potential. Hello.

15:01

Funny. Funny lady. You

15:04

call me Bear. I was talking about your toy,

15:06

the bear. I don't know why. Ignore me. Why

15:09

now? Why did you call

15:11

me Bear now? His pupils are fine. Pulse

15:13

seems right. He's a bit clammy. Joyce.

15:16

I didn't get you out here because I thought you'd be... Actually

15:19

useful. Not what I meant, but how do

15:21

you call me? Oh, Joyce, I'm

15:23

so, so sorry. I have

15:25

other pajamas and other

15:27

coats. What did you take, Ben? Nothing. I wanted

15:30

to... Wanted

15:32

the off switch. I

15:34

really did. I had some

15:36

bear. Some? When you feel like this, you call

15:39

me. You call the NA guy. You find me

15:41

and tell me. We live in the same bloody

15:43

house. Can you walk, Ben? I'll

15:45

stay here. Okay.

15:48

Uh... Okay. Relax,

15:51

Ben. Feet together. No, let me. Knees

15:54

up. Hold his knees. I didn't hold

15:56

his knees together, Simon. Mr Pratchett. I'm sure.

15:58

What are you... You'll

16:03

be fine, Ben. You have an aneurysm

16:05

and you're not a fireman. It's

16:07

not exclusive now. The public right lapsed in

16:09

1928. He's too heavy

16:11

for you. Where is nothing? Same

16:14

as yours. Calories. We've earned them off. Careful,

16:16

please. And how do you know any of

16:18

this? I did first aid.

16:20

Crowd control for a band. All-female

16:23

third-wave star. Very little crowd control. Quiet.

16:25

Got a lot of first aid. Only

16:28

for the band, oddly. Can I at

16:30

least take his feet? No. Pickle Saints.

16:32

My, my. Ah, not

16:35

to worry. Be a calm bear. Pickle Saints

16:37

don't know this. Hardly anyone

16:39

did. Whoa! Whoa.

16:43

I'm all right. Ben, you're walking now, OK?

16:45

You can walk. You're not making a lady

16:47

with an aneurysm carry you. They put a

16:49

clip on it. It's fine. It's an aneurysm

16:52

in your brain. That's not fine. Could everybody

16:54

just not be dying? Your time would be

16:56

OK. Your dying would not

16:58

be OK. You're more wrong now. Come home. You

17:00

want me home? Of course I do. We're family.

17:03

We could hug, if you... Or

17:06

not. We're family. Hey,

17:08

soup lady. Hello,

17:11

soup lady. She's Joyce. Yeah,

17:13

the lady who brings the soup. But

17:15

Joyce, Ben. Hello, Ben. Hey, are you

17:18

an airman? Another speck of vomit, aren't you? I'm neat.

17:20

Are you an airman? Now, one

17:22

foot in front of the other foot. That's it.

17:24

Come on. I know how to walk. My

17:27

mum taught me to walk. You don't... You

17:30

didn't... Why pretend

17:32

you care? Why am I out here if

17:34

I don't care? Why have I spent all night looking

17:36

for you? How do I know where to find you?

17:38

You didn't know. If you were looking all night, then

17:40

you didn't know. You forgot. This was my place. This

17:43

is sunny here all the time. Benny! If I... I

17:45

knew if you didn't bother about me, then I wouldn't

17:47

have to care about you. I need to know that...

17:51

Only then I felt bad and then

17:53

your switch happened anyway. You need an

17:55

ambulance, really. Will manage.

17:57

What people do, isn't it? Did

18:00

you sell it or chuck it in a lake? There isn't

18:02

a lake. I'm being unreasonable, just let

18:04

me. You thought

18:06

if you left the house and never came back, I'd... what? Not

18:08

notice? Be glad? I can't think. And

18:11

I can. What's wrong with you? You can tell me

18:13

things, Benny. Fight. Flight. That. But

18:16

we have the other option. We always choose

18:18

the other option. Which is? Funny. Acute stress

18:21

response under threat. There's fight or flight. But

18:23

some of us can't fight or flee. Yes, yes.

18:25

And we have, if we bloody well remember, funny.

18:28

And we get each other through a day at

18:30

a time, a moment at a time. Why

18:33

do you forget? People. They

18:35

forget anything. Pal, you're

18:37

exhausted and cold. Let's

18:39

get indoors. Joyce,

18:41

your place is... Significantly near it.

18:44

Yes, sir. Then. Careful,

18:47

Benny. It'll be okay.

18:49

It's never okay. It

18:52

is never okay. Yeah,

19:09

a minute. On my

19:11

way. Ah, hello. Hi. Birds.

19:18

Is that funny? Oh, of

19:21

course. Nice. It's accepted

19:23

the incredible race. Wellington's

19:26

rinsed out okay. No idea. I lost

19:29

interest of the first half hour. I'm so cold, my hands don't work.

19:34

Oh, so soaking. May

19:37

I come in? Sorry. Sorry,

19:39

Gail. Your own kitchen.

19:41

Naturally welcome. Your cooking? Ah,

19:44

just something to do. I mean, a

19:47

kitchen, cooking is a way to exist

19:49

in this space. You're not a cook. Your

19:52

cooking is a way to exist in this space. You

19:56

have a lot of your cupboards. They're

19:58

like Tutankhamun's too. tumor full

20:00

of tinterotis. Mainly that. Lentils and

20:02

flour at the bottom of the wardrobe. We'll

20:05

say Frank Yarmulian. They are not

20:07

good. War as hell. I've got

20:09

supply and dieting since the... The

20:11

horrifying catalogue of unfurling calamity and

20:13

dark. Mainly that. You can cook.

20:16

You didn't say. Was I supposed to?

20:18

I have been bringing you food for

20:21

months, more than a year. Years actually.

20:23

Well you never asked if I could

20:25

cook it and you had your habit

20:27

of bringing food and I had mine

20:30

eating it and then when you were in

20:32

my life house and also life I was

20:34

going to mention cooking before it got awkward and

20:36

then we ran out of time. This

20:39

is a sort of cassoulet

20:41

will be. Your potatoes

20:44

seem tired. Best

20:47

of years of all the veg I thought. I see.

20:50

I don't know if you absolutely do. How's

20:52

the patient? Washed. Nice towels.

20:54

New. I like them. Why didn't

20:56

you call him Bear? If that was his name.

20:59

Because I don't know. I thought he'd

21:01

want to be a grown-up. But he

21:03

wants to be grown up. Time just

21:05

makes it compulsory. Quite. He's

21:07

on the sofa sleeping like a tiny

21:10

boy, like a tiny bear. Well I'm going

21:12

to find a pullover and... Are

21:15

you crying? Low

21:18

and slow. Let it simmer. Mr Pratt I

21:20

will not have it. It's nice. Good recipe.

21:22

I will not have you crying and

21:24

expecting I'll ignore it. Sorry. I

21:28

don't know him now. Not really. Not

21:30

yet. He thought I wanted

21:32

him to go away. Then he doesn't know you

21:35

either. We had a

21:37

fight. I said

21:39

he needed to call his sponsor, you

21:41

know, Narcotics Anonymous and then we're

21:43

shouting and I went for a walk and

21:45

I can't remember what I said to make

21:48

him run away. He's got nowhere to run

21:50

to. He was staying with his

21:52

dad. A man's a bloody monster. You used to

21:54

hurt him, sell his belongings. He bends only 17.

21:56

I know. He looks 20. Hershey

22:00

The of his eyes. What? Why

22:02

did he get a life that

22:04

gave you my old eyes? His son?

22:06

Nothing wrong is a baby. You eat.

22:09

It is the baby I used to

22:11

hold when Charity was when when we

22:13

western concept of terms and there's

22:15

no point to someone who's term but

22:18

this. Are

22:20

you reasons me to. Hunt. I don't know. Proper.

22:22

For his I need to since and. Tell

22:26

me that Your mouth. When.

22:30

When chart was growing up with, we

22:33

were. Perfect. For this.

22:37

And the way she danced it was. It is

22:39

the way her mother dogs when we were. Before

22:43

the hospital stuff is funny. We were

22:46

going to split up and then her

22:48

being terminal saved us for made months.

22:50

The toys like that, you get something

22:52

settled. Whatever it is, it's feels solid,

22:54

but it's only the pause before everything

22:56

breaks. I'm not asking to be cheered

22:59

up on no time at season when

23:01

I even say. The

23:03

So would have. Is

23:05

T had new plan of have

23:07

forced in the average shovel test.

23:10

Somebody said it in any serious understood

23:12

it offers. this wasn't needed. That and

23:15

need me now. Always done. Since it

23:17

maybe I am doing cat. Sized

23:21

bad. Weather

23:26

have is a sense that. Was.

23:30

Wrong with your. Family

23:40

will have screwed. Divorce

23:43

me as anything.

23:47

It's a case of sounds. Able

23:49

to evade you sound the same line as

23:51

you like by man was lying down with

23:53

local. Law.

24:02

What I have wasn't. Decapitation and he

24:04

goes missing. Hip hop is. Hop

24:07

on the. Front

24:09

of his. Earth. Cooled

24:12

off. On

24:14

square in. My

24:17

Lufthansa travel without a thought. You were fan.

24:19

And honey you know about the will with

24:21

home screen because why wouldn't I? The Wilhelm

24:24

scream for been overcome by anyone? Could Wilhelm

24:26

for be hacked? A good summary: Share Bully.

24:28

I know things, useful things. and I woke

24:30

up and I felt kind of okay. I'm

24:32

sorry I forgot. everything I do is ride.

24:34

Never said that, Never. I just don't understand

24:37

you and or not on I'm trying six months

24:39

I still can't get you still won't let me

24:41

know you don't want to say be we didn't

24:43

know so I know the wilhelm scream because I

24:46

go is i love sound semi thing they

24:48

with while my saying and no one can take

24:50

them and you got bloody podcast you make the

24:52

pod cause a hobby i didn't know you're measuring

24:54

in the guards and i. Listened and it's

24:56

it's. nice and it's funny. And kind and

24:58

I really like thank you to be like that

25:01

with mean there are promise you I'm really sorry

25:03

when I'm asleep. a new record it all and

25:05

eyes if any you could find miss home or

25:07

hey what are not allowed to listen I spoil

25:09

I would use force in idea in common and

25:12

I know from the key in the door from

25:14

the sound of his see how he'd be or

25:16

that be other people I'd listen to my sounds

25:18

and I'd be somewhere else of the. Stupid.

25:20

Stupid kid and I think if I

25:22

just forget about him and see my

25:24

forget about me. You're the one

25:27

who forgot you plan to love to

25:29

be done for time. I hate it

25:31

when you for said. I

25:42

used to. A

25:45

newer me on are no one of. People.

25:49

Are know that people have died from Rudy

25:51

A mind of who was required. That.

25:53

Boy he grabbed my life. So

25:57

I miss the some homes really. The.

26:01

World will. Barely

26:03

hear. Any to

26:05

really take a breath and shut

26:07

my eyes. The in France trying

26:09

think there is some unless they

26:11

were no and bloody France youth

26:13

you think I runaways. Singing

26:16

and the sun is shining.

26:18

Caught cooking almonds in sugarland

26:20

Who can smell the caramel

26:22

and read. A

26:24

pool or don't need manager

26:26

who always try to manage.

26:29

Managing. Is what I do instead

26:31

of love when love would prove the

26:33

senses and now we'll com. Not

26:35

shouting. Speak

26:38

To them. That

26:41

is. I

26:45

mean, I'm not arguing. Or. Sensible.

26:48

I'm not in general sense of. Irony:

26:51

A breeze. Episodes of Common Sense myself.

26:53

As like a nervous rash. As

26:57

opposed to a fool leprosy. own on

26:59

that both and. Why does anything pleasant make

27:01

the start to see like. On rhetorical question

27:03

or can. We

27:06

have to go upstairs. Know that? This

27:09

will be right. Under

27:23

and have as much. As.

27:30

The older one liner, let's lads like

27:32

screaming into a match cook some Arabian

27:34

Sea. Oh God.

27:37

Now worth. Zoo

27:40

current. I would like to talk

27:42

current as back bay and I'm

27:44

sorry when I was your as

27:46

grand as work grand as they

27:48

had toffees and cardigans. In the

27:50

future was an already on fire

27:52

and we want our enough to

27:54

live for whom forever Although I

27:56

would be delighted if you want

27:58

now serves Stay forever. Not

28:03

the bedroom

28:06

then. Well, obviously

28:13

not the airing cupboard. I felt extremely

28:15

safe in an airing cupboard before now. Was

28:17

life really like that? Sometimes, not now, so

28:20

I'm fine. It's

28:22

going to be the bathroom, isn't it? Because

28:25

it has a lock. Ben!

28:33

Oh, soap and up,

28:35

Ben. Don't worry us again. No one

28:37

hates you. You weren't there. I

28:40

know. I wanted to be. You were my

28:42

part. Then me and Mum went away

28:44

with him and you never even bloody wrote to me.

28:46

I did write every week. There's a box in

28:48

my attic with all of... They

28:51

just got returned. Sorry, wrong address. And

28:53

then I didn't know where you were. You gave

28:55

up. Not ever. Not for a breath. By

28:58

the time we got away, Mum was already on

29:00

the stuff. Then I started using

29:02

two and made her worse. I'm

29:05

like this. I'm a curse, you know? Ben,

29:07

I get scared and

29:09

loud, but it never means I don't love you

29:12

or whatever forget you. And

29:14

I can get quieter, so

29:16

don't be away from me again. Not

29:18

this way. Not any way. Please. Ben,

29:25

what's in there, Joyce? Nothing dangerous. Of

29:27

course it's dangerous. Bathrooms are the funfares of

29:29

risk. Ben!

29:32

Ben! Talk to me! Where

29:36

are you going? To get the door

29:38

open! I'm getting the door open! No,

29:40

you're not! You're hurting yourself! I am

29:42

not hurting my... Sod

29:46

it! Ben! What

29:49

are you doing, please? Ben,

29:52

I'm an accountant. Was an accountant. And

29:54

I loved it. The wonderful boredom.

29:56

And the total is the total. Or it's

29:58

not. I

32:00

found her lying near our front door. Oh, pal.

32:03

Just in the passage by our flat. She'd

32:06

just been through the wall from me and I was

32:08

asleep and I don't know why she went outside. We

32:12

were going to start again, you know. We

32:15

were going to catch the train and surprise you. I

32:19

can't imagine, Ben. I won't say I

32:21

can, but I'm here. We're both here.

32:24

You don't have to be alone with it. I was. Dad

32:27

pretended he was someone else

32:29

and the services people believed him.

32:33

And he got me again. I kept trying. Well,

32:37

when I'm 18, you won't need to bother. Will

32:39

you not? Your home,

32:41

home permanently. Now, right now, this is

32:43

her home, but you know what I

32:46

mean. You're welcome any time. Yeah, see,

32:49

people like you. You will be welcome

32:51

in all civilized places. You are likeable

32:53

and joyous. Likeable. Thank

32:55

you. And she

32:57

likes you too. So we're all

33:00

bloody amazing. In fact, I

33:02

think pretty much everyone is amazing after

33:05

these last years. By now,

33:07

we should all be hiding in the woods or hitting

33:09

the floor or something. But mostly

33:11

we keep on. People keep on. They

33:14

even seem OK. I

33:16

can seem OK. Sometimes

33:18

the smiles don't work. Mine, other people's.

33:20

When you see that kind of smile,

33:22

you help try to. I don't

33:24

much. I'm knackered. But I know you meant

33:26

to. You have to walk a mile in the

33:28

other person's shoes. And then you're a mile away and

33:30

you have their shoes. Did

33:33

I tell it to you? No, because we haven't

33:35

really done it. I knew it already. It's

33:39

OK. Sure. It's not wonderful.

33:42

Then again, your recent version of a knock

33:44

knock joke involves you never saying who's there

33:46

and me just occasionally munching. I

33:50

never knew you like sounds podcasts.

33:53

I didn't know you like mine. It makes

33:55

me very happy if you do. But for

33:57

crying out loud, come in and listen when

33:59

I do the next episode. And I have

34:01

this idea for OG to end up, you

34:04

know, I'd like a volcano really real

34:06

bassy rumbles In for sound Oh,

34:08

would that be too scary? I

34:10

mean, we're funny but about serious

34:12

things but funny like life

34:15

and if OG is really in peril

34:17

and with Miss Wilkins OG funkwacker What?

34:21

OG funkwacker Miss

34:24

Wilkins and OG funkwacker We're having a

34:26

moment though Joyce, me, Ben, blood on the

34:28

floor, bonding, manliness, what's some Your

34:30

podcast is Paradise Fine Good

34:33

evening gentle listeners around the world

34:35

and ships at sea Welcome to

34:37

Paradise Fine You absolute shit

34:40

Joyce, Joyce, what the hell?

34:47

The thing is, Ben, I don't

34:50

want you to think that life is, that

34:52

it won't be kind My life usually is

34:54

not running around and drama

34:56

and I'll

34:58

be in heaven Joyce! Oh, you're

35:02

coming too Me? Yeah, of

35:04

course you Simon, pop

35:13

Joyce I

35:16

was trying to tell you Elizabeth Taylor

35:19

Could there be a single hour today when everyone isn't

35:21

playing Let's Give Simon a Hard Attack It seemed to

35:24

suit my current demeanor What in hell is wrong with

35:26

you? What? You

35:28

make that podcast, you make Paradise Fine I'm

35:31

going to just bloody stop because 50% of the

35:33

time it seems to make people really upset Don't you dare This

35:36

is why I turn the comments off, feedback,

35:38

it's always confusing March 2020, I

35:40

did not smile, not once, and from there

35:42

I ended up talking to myself, or wishing

35:45

I'd go away And then Paradise

35:47

Fine was like listening to the radio with

35:49

my mum and being a kid and so

35:51

still living Listening inside the drying frame with

35:53

the blankets thrown over the floor Originally

35:55

how I recorded it It made me happy

35:57

It was a happy thing the

38:00

soup and we'll see each other every day

38:02

and get used to each other properly and

38:04

eventually It's really late Simon or early or

38:06

whatever, just go home. I can't

38:09

fight about this as well Well there's the cassoulet,

38:11

I have to take it out in a bit

38:13

and I can't go home, I've just sat down

38:15

Simon, when you get someone else, because

38:17

you need someone else, when you make a plan

38:19

for them, you have to tell them the plan

38:21

No, but no, you're

38:23

weird What? Well, not

38:26

normal, I'm not normal,

38:29

we're weird, beautiful, Ben

38:32

also I think is weird

38:34

We are all weird, and what

38:37

are the chances? And weird people can't

38:39

be with normal people, it hurts us,

38:41

we're soft and the world isn't And

38:44

there's weird and then there's weird and it

38:47

takes so long to find And

38:49

when you find the right fit, you're

38:51

lucky and you should know that and

38:54

be careful and not blow

38:56

it and I'm panicking and it's like

38:58

I'm spiraling out into space And you

39:01

knew about needing an anchor point, that's

39:03

not fair, you understanding and then going away

39:08

Do you know why this is the first time you've been in my house?

39:11

Is the answer because I'm a terrible person It's

39:13

because I can only do this one more time

39:16

Look, you

39:18

see this in my wallet with

39:21

me most of the time It's

39:24

very young, very beautiful, Eric Malcolm

39:27

Because then I'm not a single act,

39:29

I've got Eric You're

39:31

alright then, you've got Eric and

39:34

you've got Ben huh? I'll send him along

39:36

when he wakes up No, no,

39:39

you give her the picture Who woke you up?

39:41

I don't like the noise, none of the shouting

39:43

because of the stuff with him and it makes

39:45

my head go But

39:47

I was kind of awake earlier I'm beginning

39:49

to think you like being carried about You take

39:51

the picture and you give it to the nice

39:53

lady and then you're a double act with someone

39:55

who's alive It's okay, we're a double act, you

39:57

and me bit bear, Benny Bear I'd

40:00

be a moron part. We'll do the podcast

40:02

voices together. It'd be nice. We'll think of

40:04

new characters. You can be some of the

40:06

old ones, if you like. OG Frank Wacker?

40:10

Well, he's the lead. Yeah. I would like to

40:12

play him. Sure. You

40:15

can do that. Sure. We'll be fine. Oh my

40:17

God. How do you put up with him, soup

40:19

lady? Joyce. Course I want to be in the

40:21

podcast, but I'm not going to take your favour

40:23

a bit. Why would you let me take

40:25

OG? Why are you letting

40:27

her go? She's not going. We're in her

40:29

house. We have to go. I have to

40:32

go. She's actually throwing you out. I am here,

40:34

you know. Give him a chance, could you? Ben,

40:36

Ben, you're a very beautiful young man.

40:39

If you say so. You're funny the way

40:41

birds fly. That makes you beautiful. So be

40:43

very careful around people, because they'll love you.

40:46

Soup lady, there are things that are worse

40:48

than being loved. The pair of you

40:50

all know if I get too much affection, I might

40:52

be happy. And then what? Why

40:54

not choose me and not her too, Pops?

40:57

You're a grown man. You have old guy

40:59

stuff to do. Choose both. Be

41:01

a triple act. There aren't any. Groucho, Chico

41:03

and Harper would disagree. There are triple

41:06

acts. What about? Don't say what about Zeppo. He was a

41:08

straight man. Stooges, three of

41:10

them. I know funny. Funny

41:12

beats everything. Dying is

41:14

easy. Comedy is hard. That's

41:17

how strong funny is. It won't bring anyone back, but

41:20

it helps everyone left behind. I love you

41:22

very much, Bear. Very, very much.

41:28

I can't throw you out. It's OK. You

41:30

don't need to. Come on, Bear. Come on. I

41:32

can't throw you out because

41:34

I don't want to. You're

41:36

weird. I see. And I'm

41:38

aware that you have female characters in

41:40

Paradise Finds and nobody's female to play

41:42

them. That seems wrong. Patriarchal.

41:47

Joyce, you're

41:49

weird. And funny.

41:52

Lucille Ball, Katherine Hepburn, Ginger Rogers.

41:55

She didn't just dance funny as

41:57

anything. And Lovely..

42:00

And. You like a show. I love the said. It.

42:03

Reminds me of someone oh seem

42:05

odd because I was. thinking.

42:08

Of some, I'm one of. The.

42:10

Best kinds of funny. I don't say mine

42:12

is anything like as but the. Best.

42:14

Kinds there a way of saying

42:16

i know, so just. I mean,

42:19

ruinous isn't that terrible? But. We.

42:22

Still got this. We.

42:24

Still got this. Is

42:48

just as it is easy to see

42:50

massa your volume and enunciation. Mrs. Smith

42:52

Initial still differences in some of the

42:55

lot of movement smoking article I have

42:57

never encountered in danger more acoustic a

42:59

position to the a modest made in

43:01

my view possibly do with the owner

43:03

right? Well I've been so do it.

43:05

Also while it's more like like moths

43:08

and back from inevitable and tragic consequences

43:10

we're sorry for your loss and I

43:12

must confess I'm a little nervous and

43:14

on smarter possibly how do I want

43:16

to The. Box. Eventually, Claude, Basil, Doris

43:19

on the four Hundred and thirty two

43:21

others of course. Then the case next

43:23

ten minutes, and oh dear God Miss

43:25

Whoop to the yes yes before are

43:28

inevitably deeply unpleasant deaths. Will you Marry

43:30

me? Love

43:33

with. Some for a

43:35

wedding here though is it would. Like for

43:37

another take up the surface if you

43:39

want it or not. Gloomy alcove over.

43:41

There I would love seeing narrative it.

43:43

at the moment I think we'll run.

43:47

Run like to stop some. It's

43:49

got it off at an average. Of of

43:52

God's sake, shut up about your

43:54

list. Were in love. Hi

44:00

all of us have barely hacienda

44:02

zags. Is this a chance to

44:04

cancel? Bring The Knicks. Fans

44:15

goods isn't very good

44:17

also you also you.

44:22

Won't go to bars. Always.

44:53

In. A single act sign in

44:55

fact was played by Bill Nye

44:57

so seine i'm merely a Boomer

44:59

and Benzene by Sebastian Cross. It

45:01

was written by A Kennedy and

45:03

directed by Sally A Than. It

45:06

was a Bbc audio production for Radius or.

45:24

Fire breathing dragon Full

45:27

house. The

45:29

mountaintop? Something to look around.

45:31

Campus. Mythical

45:33

creatures are all around us

45:35

is. Don't

45:45

need me on a project. To

45:48

discover mythical creatures. Across the

45:50

buses on and find out what they

45:53

were mean about. The

45:55

Series Some Bbc Radio Four. Subscribes

45:58

to mythical creatures, The key

46:00

things. In.

46:04

Seventeen eighty six your hand, Wolfgang

46:06

von Gutter suffers from dreadful writer's

46:08

block and instead of night, he

46:11

sets off on his Italian journey.

46:14

Amidst the pantheon, the all

46:16

engulfing sense of lemon trees

46:18

and the enduring new Italian

46:21

models his virginity he loses

46:23

his in Rome is creativity

46:25

He rediscovers is increasing room

46:27

and beds. his inspiration gases

46:29

like the law, that of

46:31

the serious, the result of

46:33

the young artist Wanderlust. Over

46:35

eight hundred water colors and

46:37

three completed plays cherished for

46:40

all eternity. Such creative output

46:42

Warren, some don't Time. In

46:44

the cool whole for the sistine chapel

46:46

good. Stopped for a nap. On

46:49

the throne of Pope Pius, the

46:51

seats. Well.

46:54

Were Taken has always been a

46:56

good idea. How about a trip

46:58

to Rome? Where

47:00

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