Episode Transcript
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to Mobituaries with Mo-Raka wherever
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you get your podcasts. Welcome
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back, friend. I know what
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now, back to the show. we're
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joined by our good friend
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P.D. Williams, fan favorite and
4:05
somewhat-touched author of Darkhouse, many
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rooms, and longtime guest on
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your favorite podcast, pronounced P.D.
4:13
Williams. The thank
4:15
you Jeff, who
4:17
you can hear more from in numerous
4:19
past episodes. This one's
4:21
a case for entrepreneurial capitalism.
4:24
So without further delay I give you
4:27
from author P.D. Williams. Madamona's
4:30
Shop of Curiosities Blair's
4:39
Story God,
4:42
I can't take this anymore. Blair
4:45
sat up in bed, wrapping her arms
4:47
around her middle as if she were
4:50
keeping her insides from exploding through her
4:52
stomach. The pain was
4:54
worsening. Despite the
4:56
ultrasounds, lab work, x-rays, and
4:59
countless consultations, there had been
5:01
no conclusive diagnosis for her
5:03
searing abdominal pain. No
5:06
tumors, no tissue scarring,
5:08
no disease, no luck.
5:11
By her ninth second opinion, she had all
5:14
but given up hope of ever going back
5:16
to her life as it was. The
5:19
life before the sickness had ravaged her
5:21
world. The pain meds
5:23
were barely working anymore. Useless
5:26
pills, she thought. I
5:28
wonder how many
5:30
would it take? There'd
5:33
been a time in Blair's not so
5:35
distant past when the idea of ending
5:37
her life would have been unthinkable. Now
5:40
it felt like a reasonable option. An
5:43
escape plan. Enough.
5:46
This ends tonight, she
5:48
promised herself. First,
5:50
she somehow had to make it to the
5:52
medicine cabinet for the pills. It
5:55
might as well have been a hundred miles away.
5:58
The trip to the bathroom. Was merely intolerable
6:00
when she was having a good day.
6:03
But the know the thought of making
6:06
the journey bordered on the cruel and
6:08
terrified. One. mature. it.
6:11
Just one last try. To.
6:14
Do a deal for she thought.
6:17
Blair tried to make to trick
6:19
and manageable stages. First.
6:21
She needed to stand up. She
6:24
inhaled deeply and small your legs over the
6:26
says of the bed. The
6:29
discomfort was in as bad as she
6:31
feared. Next she
6:33
wrote forward a few times and
6:36
when ready, stood up. Com.
6:38
Lack July and. Blair
6:41
felt as though she had swallowed a dose
6:43
of latin and. Her. Joints
6:45
different. Tiers of
6:47
pain fell from retired as. She
6:51
to ensure snippets of their sir her
6:53
nostrils as if they could somehow the
6:55
loot the agony. After
6:58
a beard, the pain subsided enough
7:00
for her to continue Blair cry.
7:03
This economy bladed the most challenging
7:05
part of the journey. The.
7:07
Walk to the bathroom. Police.
7:11
Me test more streets. Just
7:14
a little more. Than
7:16
a new. Grandson
7:18
with the stab she is closer
7:21
toward the place where in her
7:23
salvation way. By.
7:26
The time blair get to the bathroom
7:28
she was exhausted. She.
7:30
Placed her hands on each side of
7:32
the seek. Braces yourself up. She.
7:35
Gasped when she looked in the mirror. The
7:38
fitton trim woman who used to way
7:41
I'll see one hundred and twenty pounds
7:43
was now and eighty pounds. Scarecrow. Her
7:46
skin solo and sag is seemed
7:49
too heavy for frame to bear.
7:52
Her. Bulging eyes look like to
7:54
grotesque or straight into break free
7:56
of their skill age. although
8:00
She grieved for the woman she once
8:02
was. She was too spent
8:04
to cry anymore. Blair
8:06
opened the medicine cabinet and looked at
8:08
the pharmacy that now inhabited it. She
8:12
spotted the hydromorphone and plucked it
8:14
from the stack of other medications
8:16
the doctors had prescribed. She
8:19
looked at the bottle as if it were a loaded
8:21
gun. Her resolve
8:23
began to wane. Just
8:25
like ripping off a band-aid, she
8:28
thought. Just do it quickly and
8:30
be done with it before you change your mind.
8:33
Blair popped a lid and she took four
8:36
tablets into her palm, twice
8:38
the normal dose. To be
8:40
safe, she added two more. She
8:42
filled one of the small plastic cups beside
8:45
the sink, threw the pills toward the back
8:47
of her throat, and took the full shot
8:49
of water. Blair
8:52
sat on the edge of the bathtub, waiting
8:54
for the pain to lessen enough for her
8:56
to return to bed. Within
8:59
minutes, she became lightheaded. Once
9:02
the pain ebbed, she got up and
9:04
plodded back to the place she hoped
9:06
would be her second-to-last resting spot. Blair
9:09
fell onto the mattress, closed
9:12
her weighty eyelids, and
9:14
waited for the lightness of death that
9:16
would allow her to drift away like
9:18
a wispy white feather. The
9:23
light pouring through Blair's bedroom window
9:26
the following morning covered her frail
9:28
body in a blanket of soft
9:30
gold. After
9:32
a few tries, her eyes opened and remained
9:34
so. Her mind
9:36
was fuzzy, her body limp and
9:38
heavy. As
9:40
she became lucid, she realized that she had
9:43
lived to see another day. Oh,
9:46
no, not again. She
9:48
moaned. Blair had
9:50
sat up and gotten out of bed
9:52
before she realized that her discomfort was
9:54
somewhat bearable. The
9:57
extra pills had served a useful purpose
9:59
after all. Men experience a daughter
10:01
that moments such as these were
10:03
short lived. Her. Thoughts taunted
10:05
her. I couldn't even catch
10:08
a break from suicide. Second
10:11
counts gonna have to be the charm.
10:14
A. Thirst. Let's make this
10:16
last. They feel normal. For.
10:18
A little while anyway. Blair
10:21
real as that. More than anything,
10:23
she wanted to be around people
10:25
again. She managed to
10:27
get showered and dress. When
10:30
she was ready she called a new breed
10:32
the take her to the downtown district. It
10:36
had been ages since he had
10:38
wandered the streets, shops and cafes.
10:41
Before. Leaving Blair down to couple
10:43
more hydromorphone tablets to take the
10:45
edge off. Making sure to
10:47
leave plenty for later. The
10:52
uber drop blair off in front of a
10:54
coffee shops used to frequent in the old
10:57
and better days. The. Uncomfortable
10:59
stairs from the customers as she
11:01
entered brought about a swirl of
11:03
embarrassment and sadness. Blair didn't need
11:05
a mirror to remind her of
11:08
her greens were the appearance. Their
11:10
expressions good deeper than any
11:12
crew reflection could. Blair
11:15
lived through a table at the back wall
11:17
of the cafe and eased into one of
11:20
it's soft added seats. Open
11:22
to escape any further scrutiny, she hid
11:24
behind the menu and waited for a
11:26
server to arrive. When
11:29
the server arrived, her reaction to
11:31
see him blair was awkward but
11:33
expected. Her. Clumsy attempt
11:35
to the peer into person it
11:37
struck. Blair is disingenuous and patronize.
11:39
I'm. Pushing. The
11:41
unintended offensive said she relaxed
11:43
and ordered something. She.
11:46
Played thing safe as good for a
11:48
small muffin and some tea. When.
11:51
Blair's order era of the Ah them
11:53
smelled wonderful and a very sad of
11:55
the i'm tiered her. however
11:57
the best she couldn't manage was have
11:59
them muffin and less of the warm
12:01
tea. Given
12:03
how much her stomach had shrunk, it
12:06
was enough to satisfy her. After
12:09
leaving the coffee shop, Blair walked
12:11
along the wide bustling sidewalk. Her
12:14
senses absorbed every sight, sound,
12:16
and smell. Despite
12:19
the busy life that was swirling
12:21
around her, she felt a melancholy tugging
12:23
at her soul. The
12:25
day's activities would be her last glimpse
12:28
of real life, a
12:30
life she had taken for granted. Blair
12:33
knew she was ill and had for a
12:35
while, but this was the
12:37
first time she felt like a ghost, a
12:40
stubborn soul that had not yet taken its
12:42
leave. She decided
12:44
to walk a few more blocks, then
12:46
go home and vanquish the pain for
12:48
good. Blair was
12:50
halfway down the third and final block
12:53
when she came to a store she
12:55
couldn't remember having ever seen before. It
12:58
was a small nondescript shop. Its
13:01
modest appearance was in conspicuous contrast
13:03
to the more modern, trendier stores.
13:07
Even its door looked out of date. It
13:10
was a simple affair, a
13:12
wood frame with a single large pane of
13:14
glass in the door's upper half. Stenciled
13:17
in old style calligraphy was the
13:20
shop's name, Madame
13:22
Onna's Shop of Curiosities.
13:25
Intrigued, Blair turned the door's knob
13:27
and entered. Blair
13:32
found a small bell over the door
13:34
quaint and musical as it announced her
13:36
arrival. Despite the
13:38
foot traffic just beyond its door, the
13:40
shop was empty of customers. Its
13:43
interior brought to Blair's mind the Norman
13:46
Rockwell painting of a small town general's
13:48
floor. The old ceiling
13:50
fans, combined with the rough hardwood
13:53
floors, created a worn rustic look.
13:56
The place was full of shelves and
13:58
glass display cases of Mr. mystical odds
14:00
and ends, jars of
14:03
colored powders, crystals, incense, and
14:05
old books. Blair
14:07
felt as if she had stumbled through a
14:09
mirrored doorway and into a magical lair. She
14:13
was so enthralled by the spiritual essence
14:15
of the place that the woman's voice
14:17
startled her. Welcome to
14:19
my store, said the woman.
14:21
I am
14:24
Madamona. I
14:26
apologize for having scared you.
14:29
Madamona spoke with an exotic
14:31
accent that Blair couldn't quite
14:33
place. The diminutive
14:35
woman was dressed in a loose
14:37
floral mumu. She was
14:40
middle-aged with piercing blue eyes. Her
14:43
unkempt mane of bushy white hair
14:45
was so bright that Blair squinted
14:47
at first. Despite
14:49
the woman's small stature, her
14:51
presence was intimidating. Is that
14:54
so right? Blair said in response
14:56
to the woman's apology. I
14:59
was enjoying your store so much that I didn't notice
15:01
you were there. My, you
15:03
have a lot of interesting things here. Madamona's
15:06
head swiveled as if she was viewing
15:09
the setting for the first time. Yes,
15:13
she said. A lot
15:15
of interesting things. Her
15:18
eyes locked with blares. Something
15:21
brings you here today. A
15:25
worry? A need?
15:28
Ah, that's it. A
15:31
need. Her
15:33
eyes closed and she tilted her head
15:35
to one side as if she was
15:37
receiving an important message from some mystical
15:39
force far away. It is
15:42
deep. It is
15:44
a good pain that modern
15:46
practices cannot debate, yes? That's
15:51
right, Blair muttered. The
15:54
woman's intuition both impressed and unnerved
15:56
her, as if
15:58
sensing Blair's apprehension and Madame on
16:00
his ominous demeanor changed to a
16:02
gentle patience. "'Fear not,
16:05
child. I can help
16:07
you,' she said. Her gaze
16:10
settled on an item resting on the
16:12
top shelf to Blair's left. It
16:15
was a tiny glass bottle, not
16:17
much larger than a shot glass, that had
16:19
a cork feel. There
16:21
was no label of any kind
16:24
to identify the single ingredient, a
16:26
black, white speckled capsule. "'That
16:29
bottle there,' Madame
16:32
on the said pointed. "'Pick
16:35
it up,' she said
16:37
it as if she were a teacher coaxing
16:39
a student into plucking a flower to examine.
16:42
Blair pinched a curious remedy between her
16:45
thumb and index finger and studied it.
16:48
"'What is it? What's
16:50
inside that bottle will
16:53
devour all your pain?
16:56
That is your need.' "'Your
17:00
desire, yes?' Blair
17:03
was torn between trusting Madame Onna
17:05
and avoiding being deceived. Such
17:08
an act seemed cruel and self-serving.
17:11
After all, she had a full bottle of
17:13
cure waiting at home in her medicine cabinet.
17:16
Why should the woman profit from her
17:18
misery? As far as
17:20
Blair was concerned, Madame Onna was offering
17:23
her little more than snake oil. But
17:26
Blair's anguish was forcing her hand.
17:29
She wanted so badly to believe that
17:31
there was hope for herself that she
17:33
pushed aside her suspicions and
17:35
allowed herself to be vulnerable. "'Please
17:38
don't hold out false hope to
17:40
me,' Blair begged. "'This
17:42
is my last attempt before I end
17:45
this hell myself. So
17:47
please, please don't take this lightly.
17:50
I'm a human being and I'm
17:53
desperate.' Madame
17:55
Onna smiled at Blair as a mother
17:57
would behold her splendid child. I
18:00
know, I know young
18:03
one. Your
18:05
clear and logical mind is
18:07
saying, Oh
18:10
crazy lady, look
18:12
at all her shrunken
18:14
heads, potions and crystals.
18:18
But then there's that part of
18:21
you that wants, needs
18:23
to know that magic exists.
18:27
She pointed at the bottle that Blair was
18:29
clutching. That item
18:31
can erase the agony that
18:33
the so-called specialist's blade
18:36
could never be healed.
18:39
The choice of course is
18:41
yours. But ask
18:44
yourself, after all
18:47
the medicines that have been given
18:49
to me, do
18:51
I feel better or
18:53
worse? Yes. Madamona
18:55
let the question hover for a bit.
18:58
Yes, I said that the
19:01
season is yours. Either
19:04
way, thank you for
19:06
coming in. And
19:09
be sure to tell a friend.
19:12
Then she turned and walked away. Wait,
19:16
Blair called. Madamona
19:19
stopped. Without turning
19:21
around, she asked. Yes.
19:24
How much? Madamona
19:27
turned and joined Blair. Nothing
19:31
now, she said. But
19:34
when the cure has done its
19:37
work, call me and
19:40
I will come to you. Then
19:43
discuss the payment then.
19:46
Blair's wariness returned. So
19:50
you don't want me to pay for this today?
19:52
She asked. I
19:55
can just take it and go. How do
19:57
you know I won't cheat you? None
20:00
ever have. I'm
20:03
sure you won't either." Madamona
20:07
reached into one of her pockets and
20:09
retrieved a small card and handed it
20:11
to Blair. When
20:13
Blair tried to take the card from her,
20:16
she held onto its edge tightly. In
20:19
a somber tone she said, Listen
20:22
child, you
20:24
must be patient. You
20:27
need to get the remedy enough
20:30
time to do its magic. A
20:33
few weeks and none less.
20:37
I promise I won't betray your
20:39
trust, Blair said. I'm
20:42
sure you won't, child. Now
20:45
go. Take it. And
20:48
I will wait for your call.
20:52
Going to the front door, it occurred to
20:55
Blair to ask an important question she had
20:57
not thought of before. Stopping,
20:59
she said. Excuse me,
21:01
ma'am. Should I be concerned
21:03
about any side effects? Once
21:07
you take it, you'll experience
21:09
some tiredness. And
21:12
your appetite will increase. Anything
21:16
else? No.
21:18
Thank you for a... Madamona
21:20
was already walking to the back
21:23
room, leaving Blair alone
21:25
with her miracle cure. Blair
21:29
didn't want to wait until she got
21:31
home before taking the capsule. Though
21:34
she returned to the cafe she had
21:36
visited earlier, she ordered
21:38
a cup of coffee and then called for an
21:40
Uber. She took the
21:42
small bottle from her purse and laid it on the
21:44
table in front of her. She
21:47
stared at it, wondering if it would help
21:49
her if only a bit. Anything's
21:52
better than nothing, she thought.
21:55
When her coffee arrived, Blair removed the capsule
21:57
from the bottle and swallowed it. it
22:00
with a swig of coffee. The
22:02
hot liquid angered her insides. That's
22:06
enough of that, she
22:08
thought, setting the coffee aside. Thankfully,
22:11
by the time the Uber arrived,
22:13
the burning had subsided. Blair
22:16
hopped into the car and headed straight
22:18
home, eager to see what would unfold.
22:24
The cloak of twilight painted Blair's
22:26
apartment with a bluish tinge. She
22:30
lay curled up in an oversized leather
22:32
chair beside the living room window, reading.
22:35
The growl from her stomach reminded her
22:38
she had eaten nothing since earlier. She
22:41
closed the book and set about making dinner.
22:44
Blair went to the kitchen, found a small
22:46
pot, and set it on the stove. Then
22:49
she opened the cupboard and twirled the lazy
22:52
Susan until she found a can of tomato
22:54
soup. Soft foods and
22:56
liquids were all she could tolerate. She
22:59
remembered the woman's promise that her appetite
23:01
would improve. I'd
23:04
give everything I owned for a
23:06
single slice of pepperoni and pineapple
23:08
pizza, she thought. Once
23:11
Blair had heated the soup to a
23:13
moderately warm temperature, she emptied it into
23:15
a bowl, and grabbed a spoon. She
23:19
sat down at the table and worked up the
23:21
courage to eat. With
23:23
hesitation, she spooned some of the soup
23:25
into her mouth. Blair
23:27
braced herself for the first wave of
23:29
suffering. But to her
23:32
pleasure and amazement, the tepid
23:34
liquid made its way painlessly to her
23:36
stomach. She
23:38
ate a couple more spoonfuls, again
23:41
no burning sensation. Relieved
23:43
by the kindness of her stomach, she
23:45
gulped down the rest of the soup.
23:49
Oh my gosh, it worked, she
23:51
said. She briefly considered
23:54
rushing back to Matamona's store and giving
23:56
the woman a big hug, but first
23:58
her stomach was screaming. for another bowl
24:00
of soup. Later
24:03
that evening, Blair stood before her
24:05
medicine cabinet, the site she
24:07
had planned for her suicide. She
24:10
unscrewed the lid of the hydromorphone and
24:12
shook a couple into her hand. She
24:15
was about to take them but paused as
24:17
she noticed the absence of any pain, not
24:20
even a slight twinge. Blair
24:23
smiled as she recalled it had only
24:25
been that morning when she had planned
24:27
to swallow the entire bottle of painkillers.
24:30
Now she was content to skip a dose.
24:33
She returned the medicine to the cabinet and
24:35
went to bed. For the
24:37
first time in months, she didn't need to
24:39
be drugged out of her mind to fall
24:41
asleep. A
24:46
strong grumbling in her belly awoke Blair in
24:48
the middle of the night. Typically,
24:50
it would have been a twist in pain she
24:52
had to deal with. Now it
24:55
was a deep hunger. The
24:57
welcome return of her appetite filled her
24:59
with joy and gratitude. She
25:02
climbed out of bed and headed to the kitchen
25:04
to appease it. Blair
25:06
had a craving for something more filling
25:08
than soup or jello. Although
25:11
thrilled to get her appetite back, she
25:13
couldn't wrap her head around the strength
25:15
of her gnawing hunger. She
25:18
kept little in the way of solid food,
25:20
so she ended up placing a large order
25:23
from an all-night diner. As
25:25
she waited for the delivery person,
25:27
she walked around her apartment, cramming
25:29
saltines into her mouth and guzzling
25:31
water. By the
25:33
time the two turkey subs with
25:35
fries arrived, she'd consumed a half
25:37
a dozen individual servings of puddin',
25:40
two cans of soup, and
25:42
nearly a gallon of water. When
25:44
the food was gone, Blair returned to bed.
25:47
Despite having slept for many hours
25:50
before her binge, Blair felt baffled
25:52
by how exhausted she was. She
25:55
Slept for another 15 hours. When.
26:01
Blair finally awake and it
26:03
was late afternoon. Despite.
26:05
The extraordinary amount of sleep
26:07
she was still dog tired.
26:09
The only activity she felt
26:11
any energy toward was eaten.
26:14
She. Shuffled around the kitchen in search
26:16
of something to consume, but found nothing.
26:20
She. Grabbed the quick shower and headed
26:22
for the supermarket. Blair
26:24
went crazy at the store. She bus
26:26
so many groceries that she paid uber
26:28
driver an extra ten dollars to help
26:30
her, told them up to her apartment.
26:33
Before Blair could put them away, her
26:36
stomach mack and again. An
26:38
excessive amount of cookies so does
26:40
have thick sandwiches. Eventually say that
26:43
her appetite. Then
26:45
the drowsiness returned. She
26:47
slipped for seventeen hours. The
26:52
cycle continued for another two
26:54
weeks. But. Then Blair had
26:57
gained forty seven pounds and was sleep
26:59
and twenty hours each. Not. Or
27:02
desire to eat was relentless. She.
27:04
Considered going back to her doctor but remember the
27:07
hell little he had been able to help her.
27:09
thinking. of reaching out the mayor
27:12
the she remembered the adverse. Allow
27:14
a few weeks for the remedy to
27:16
work. Within
27:19
days, Blair had gained an
27:21
additional fifteen pounds. She.
27:24
Hadn't bathed in over a week. Perform.
27:26
Physical appearance used at Fred Meyer
27:28
but our current state shocked her
27:31
more. As Blair
27:33
stood on the bathroom scale, looking
27:35
down at the escalate numbers, she
27:37
became concerned. It's
27:39
too far. She saw snow
27:42
headed to foreign the other
27:44
direction. Sweaty.
27:46
And dizzy blair stumble to the bathroom
27:48
sink and turned on the cold water.
27:51
She. Cooked dinner though he hands and splashed
27:54
and on her face. Vinci
27:56
ran her fingers to her own was tear.
27:59
The. They'll take a male startled her.
28:02
Oh God. What's wrong with
28:05
me? The
28:07
springs early blair still crave
28:09
food. As quickly as
28:11
or bloated body allowed, she was able
28:13
to the kitchen and eight for almost
28:16
an hour. After. Gorging
28:18
on everything that was left Blair
28:20
blocked on the living room sofa.
28:23
Suddenly. It said like sumptuous
28:25
latin around and says her. In.
28:27
The Just is. She.
28:29
Lifted her shirt and looked at her
28:31
abdomen. A small
28:33
mob pushed outward. Blair
28:36
felt nauseous and afraid. She.
28:39
Touched the protrusion with their fingertips
28:41
and it receded. She
28:43
began patton like a cornered animal
28:45
as she felt the mass moving
28:47
up toward her chest cavity, making
28:49
her scream. Blood dripped
28:51
from her nose while some ran down
28:53
their throat, leaving the coppery taste on
28:55
the back of her tone. For.
28:58
Man began were and women
29:00
do to meet some common
29:02
or rare now. Blair
29:05
staggered to the bedroom.
29:07
Where he is it.
29:10
Where is it? She.
29:12
Dumped the contents of a person to
29:15
the beer and push the album's around
29:17
until she found her phone and madam
29:19
owners cord. She cold
29:21
and waited. Someone.
29:23
Answered on the third ring but the
29:25
her it felt like many more. Medals
29:28
owners shut the studio city.
29:31
it's. Much easier
29:33
just. Blair. Recognize
29:35
the woman's be girl and voice
29:38
panicked she said yes. Hillary and
29:40
Bill Remember me at visited your
29:42
shop a short while back You
29:45
help me A remedy for electronics
29:47
Direct Ties. Is a
29:50
stand. I mean that
29:52
you've added. Madam.
29:54
Own as sounded Please does this you were
29:56
here and from an old friend. Sally's.
30:01
Are you eating and sleeping then?
30:04
The zip pain. Tell me
30:07
of the zip pain. Is
30:09
it gone?" Blair was
30:11
shivering. "'Yes, the pain's
30:13
gone, but I'm experiencing some
30:15
serious side effects. I
30:17
sleep for hours on end and I can't
30:19
stop eating. I don't
30:22
recognize myself anymore. Now my
30:24
hair's falling out and I'm pretty sure
30:26
I'm hemorrhaging. I'm scared
30:28
to death.'" "'Just as
30:30
I told you, there would
30:33
be side effects. Are
30:36
you experiencing any other
30:38
symptoms?'" "'Yes,
30:41
something is moving around inside me. You
30:44
didn't say anything about that. Am
30:46
I going to die? Do I
30:48
need a doctor?'" Madamona
30:50
tittered, then in a reassuring
30:52
tone, said, "'You are
30:55
not going to die, child.
30:58
The Cremity has merely done its
31:00
job. There's
31:02
only one less debt, and
31:05
then you will return to
31:07
normal. No
31:09
more worries now. There's
31:12
only one less debt, and
31:15
then you will return to normal.
31:19
No more worries now.'" Her
31:22
sincerity soothed Blair. "'Thank
31:25
you,' Blair said. "'I'm
31:28
just eager for this to be over.'" "'And
31:31
soon it will be,' Madamona
31:34
said. "'But before
31:37
I come, I need to
31:39
know that you will honor
31:41
your part of the bargain.
31:44
You must pay me.'" "'Of
31:47
course,' Blair said. "'How
31:50
much do you want?'" "'One
31:53
thousand dollars.'" The
31:56
press stunned Blair. "'Oh,
31:58
listen. I don't want to...' seem
32:00
ungrateful but that sounds
32:02
a little steep for a single dose of
32:04
medicine. No,
32:06
no, the remedy is
32:08
free. The charge
32:11
is for the removal. Blair
32:15
was confused. Removal?
32:18
Why removal? Why
32:21
wasn't that capsule? Oh,
32:24
my child. It was
32:27
no capsule. t
32:30
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35:00
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dare, your night
35:05
is about to get a whole lot
35:08
darker. Broderick's
35:29
Story There
35:33
lurks within each of us, a
35:35
haunted house inhabited by the ghosts
35:37
of our worst mistakes. Broderick
35:40
O'Connor was no exception. Broderick
35:43
was an asshat, plain and simple. He
35:46
was all sunshine and bunnies as long as
35:49
everything went his way. He
35:51
were either the love of his life,
35:53
his bestest bud, or a job that
35:55
was enjoyable and satisfying. That
35:58
is until you crossed the line. Oh
36:01
yeah, that line. Once
36:04
you crossed it, there was no chance of going
36:06
back. You were
36:09
now excommunicated, dumped, despised, scorned,
36:11
or in extreme cases, dead
36:13
to him. Ex-friends,
36:16
jilted lovers, forsaken
36:18
parents, and unfortunate
36:20
food servers littered the desolate highway
36:23
of his icy heart. When
36:25
it came to women, Broderick found
36:28
attraction in those who possessed beauty,
36:30
intelligence, and emotional dependence. He
36:33
viewed them as drinks he could pull from
36:35
the fridge any time he was thirsty for
36:37
a particular flavor. It
36:40
was any one, any time,
36:42
any where, for tall, handsome
36:44
Broderick. God, life was
36:46
good. Then came
36:49
Lila, his first genuine love.
36:52
She was a different scenario altogether.
36:55
She was sharp-witted, pleasant, and
36:57
self-aware, qualities that
36:59
Broderick lacked. Her
37:01
attraction to him mystified her friends and
37:04
family, perhaps herself a bit
37:06
as well. I can't
37:08
help myself, she often told
37:10
herself. There's just something about
37:12
that jerk I can't turn away from. Still,
37:15
Lila had the pick of the lovesick
37:17
man-puppies who followed her around with their
37:20
tongues hanging out, hoping to catch her
37:22
notice. This
37:24
only made Broderick more determined to woo
37:26
her, to have her, control
37:29
her. Although he
37:31
had plucked others with ease, Lila's roots
37:33
went deep. She was hip
37:35
to his jive, and she let him know it. Broderick
37:39
realized, perhaps for the first time, that
37:41
he had become the clingy lover. But
37:45
he was okay with that. He
37:47
reasoned that at some point, all
37:49
wild stallions got corralled. Now
37:52
was clearly his time. However,
37:55
as in many relationships, needs
37:57
and wants change. Two
38:00
relatively blissful Hallmark movie past
38:02
the Kleenex years together, Lila
38:05
made her new needs known. She
38:08
wanted to get married and soon. Broderick
38:10
did not want her to. Lila
38:13
never misled Broderick and had been communicating
38:15
to him for months that she had
38:18
downgraded her once stormy passion for him
38:20
to a localized let's be friends drizzle.
38:23
It never crossed Broderick's mind that she
38:25
would tire of his temper tantrums and
38:28
selfishness, but boy did he
38:30
get his mind around reality when she
38:32
packed up, kissed his cheek and wished
38:34
him well. Broderick
38:36
moped for weeks. It didn't
38:39
help that on the few occasions he
38:41
dragged himself out of his lonely cluttered
38:43
apartment he would run into Lila and
38:45
her fiancé Ted. If
38:48
Broderick went to a movie they were there.
38:51
To a bar? There. At
38:53
a concert? Four seats down
38:55
on the left. Hell,
38:58
Broderick thought. If
39:00
I moved to the middle of the Gobi
39:02
Desert they'd come by on a flowery float
39:04
with the USC marching band out front
39:06
passing wind to the tune of living
39:09
La Vida Loca. Broderick's
39:12
emotional stability vacillated. He
39:14
hated her. He loved her. No,
39:17
wait, he hated her and wished her
39:19
butt would break off. Yet
39:21
he desired her. He needed her.
39:25
During one of his brief moments of
39:27
introspection, Broderick pummeled himself with the truth.
39:30
I was a complete tool. It's
39:33
time to take yourself in hand and admit you
39:35
were a jerk. She
39:37
was always given and you were always
39:40
taken and asking for a receipt. Sorry,
39:43
dog. This one's all on you.
39:46
Every time Broderick called to
39:48
apologize, Lila accepted the apology.
39:52
Each time he called and begged for
39:54
another opportunity, she asked him to be
39:56
happy for her and move on. threats
40:00
at her, Ted had a few threats of
40:02
his own. And so,
40:05
Broderick lived alone, unloved,
40:07
unwashed, unshaven, and unhappy.
40:10
Except for work, he rarely left the
40:13
apartment. However, that changed
40:15
one mild sunny Sunday when he
40:17
talked himself into venturing outdoors. Broderick
40:23
called an Uber and went for a ride
40:25
that had no set destination. When
40:28
he was tired of riding, he paid
40:30
the driver, got out, and started walking.
40:33
During his long and aimless trek,
40:35
Broderick made only three stops. The
40:38
first one was to eat a hot meal
40:40
at a downtown cafe. The
40:42
second stop was to check out his reflection
40:44
in a large shop window. Sure,
40:47
he was full of angst, but OMG,
40:49
did he still look hot or what?
40:52
The last stop was either impulse
40:54
or destiny. He couldn't be
40:56
sure which, and he didn't much care. Tucked
40:59
between two downtown businesses was
41:02
a small, unremarkable shop. Its
41:05
outdated appearance suited a small
41:07
town better than bustling Boston.
41:09
There was a stenciled sign on
41:11
the door that read, Madamona's Shop
41:14
of Curiosities. You gotta
41:16
love the originality, Broderick thought.
41:19
He was about to give the store a
41:21
hard pass when he felt an unseen force.
41:24
Was it fascination? Drawing him
41:26
toward it, Broderick paused,
41:28
staring at the door, deciding if
41:30
he should enter. What
41:32
else do I have to do today? He
41:35
thought. With his decision
41:37
made, he entered the odd shop.
41:40
A small delicate bell over the
41:43
door deemed annoying him. Broderick
41:46
sauntered through the front of the store,
41:48
taking in the atmosphere, wondering,
41:51
what the hell kind of crap is this? The
41:55
simple down-home appearance of the store,
41:57
along with its odd collections of
41:59
bottled powders, trinkets, and potions
42:01
struck him as hokey. A
42:04
sweet smell of strawberry incense permeated
42:06
the air. Aside from
42:08
him, the place was empty, making
42:11
him uneasy. Still, his
42:13
curiosity led him to venture further
42:15
into the mysterious store. Caught
42:18
up in the shop's entry, Broderick
42:20
moved from aisle to aisle, inspecting
42:22
the various items for sale. The
42:25
only sound was his feet tapping
42:28
against a wooden floor like the
42:30
slow clippity-clop of a horse's hooves
42:32
on cobblestone. The
42:34
silence of the store deepened until,
42:36
"'How may I serve you
42:39
today?' the unexpected
42:41
voice asked, startling Broderick.
42:44
"'Whoa!' Broderick snapped. "'I
42:47
almost made mud in my shorts!' "'I
42:50
apologize for startling you,'
42:53
the small thin woman with bright white
42:55
hair said. "'I
42:58
am the proprietor, Madame
43:01
Ona.' "'Congratulations,'
43:04
Broderick said, catching his breath. He
43:08
poked some items with his index finger,
43:10
assessing their interest. "'You've
43:13
got a lot of unusual stuff here.' "'Yes,
43:16
a lot of unusual
43:19
things. Perhaps
43:22
I possess something you
43:24
desire. "'I
43:26
need.' Broderick
43:28
continued picking through the merchandise with
43:31
lazy attention, as though he
43:33
hadn't heard her. Then,
43:35
after a moment, said, "'Lady, I
43:37
don't see anything I want, much
43:40
less need.' The
43:42
mysterious woman scowled, her
43:45
eyes a hard, steely blue. "'Really?
43:49
I'll be the judge of that.'
43:54
The six-size widened as the diminutive
43:56
woman quickly closed the distance between
43:58
them. He
44:01
mumbled. Once
44:03
Madam Hona was face to face
44:05
with Broderick, her ominous demeanor diminished
44:07
and she became a sales clerk
44:09
again. She looked at
44:11
an item on the middle shelf to Broderick's
44:13
right. It was a
44:15
grayish colored stone, roughly the size and
44:17
shape of a spearhead, cushioned
44:20
on a bed of black satin cloth.
44:23
The object looked old but clean. It
44:26
bore an unusual symbol. An
44:28
oval at the top connected to a
44:31
jagged line running to the bottom, with
44:33
a short arrow jutting out near the
44:35
end like a kickstand. Pick
44:38
it up, Madam Hona said.
44:41
This, Broderick asked, pointing to
44:43
the stone. Yes,
44:45
that one. Why
44:48
this one? I
44:50
sense you have a need.
44:54
This item could be helpful.
44:58
Be careful when you touch it.
45:02
Broderick inced his hand toward the stone as
45:04
if it were a snake he was attempting
45:06
to grab without being bitten. Boo,
45:10
Madam Hona shouted. Broderick
45:12
again thought he might require some absorbent
45:14
underwear. Just kidding.
45:19
Madam Hona said with a hearty laugh.
45:23
Seriously, though, pick
45:26
it up and look at it.
45:30
Broderick, more irritated than amused, relaxed
45:32
and took the stone. Although
45:35
it was small, it had a dense and heavy
45:38
feel, measuring only four or
45:40
five inches in length and a couple
45:42
of inches at its widest point. Okay,
45:44
now what? Broderick asked,
45:47
with weak interest. Look
45:49
at the symbol, Madam
45:52
Hona said. Feel
45:54
the weight of the stone
45:56
in your hand. Broderick,
45:59
please. briefly tossed the piece from hand
46:01
to hand. So, what
46:03
is it? A
46:05
talisman, she answered.
46:08
What's it go for? He said as
46:10
he continued playing with the piece. Ten
46:14
thousand dollars. What?
46:17
Broderick screeched in surprise, losing his
46:19
grip on the stone. He
46:22
resembled a man trying to hang onto
46:24
a flopping fish as he hilariously attempted
46:26
to grab it. Recovering
46:29
his grip on the talisman, he asked.
46:32
Why in the heck would you have a ten
46:34
thousand dollar item just sitting out here like this?
46:37
Easy, easy, easy, easy, easy, easy, easy, easy, easy, easy,
46:40
easy, easy. Madamona said in a calm, measured
46:42
tone. I wouldn't.
46:46
It's not for the actual
46:48
price. As
46:50
Madamona chuckled again at his
46:52
expense, Broderick's facial expression conveyed
46:54
a tandem of relief and
46:56
hostility. After enjoying
46:59
her cruel trick, Madamona became serious
47:01
again. As I
47:03
said, I suspect
47:05
it is a need that
47:07
brought you here today. Nah,
47:11
I'm pretty sure it was boredom and
47:13
an Uber, Broderick said in a sarcastic
47:15
tone. I guess
47:17
it's your turn to make
47:19
jokes, Madamona said
47:21
good-naturedly. That's fair. Now let's return to
47:23
our initial discussion. I think you are a person burdened
47:26
with guilt and regret. Ziggin,
47:37
when you should have zigged.
47:41
Sayin' no when you should have
47:43
said yes. Or
47:45
sayin' yes when you
47:47
should have said no. Your
47:51
ego has brought about the
47:54
failure of all your meaningful
47:56
relationships. Like
47:58
countless... other
48:00
shit and spirits, you
48:03
long to rewind time
48:05
and make different choices with
48:08
the knowledge that you possess
48:10
today." As
48:13
his smarmy veneer melted away, Broderick
48:15
felt the shame of a man
48:18
who had been caught red-handed and
48:20
who must now accept judgment. That's
48:23
right, he whispered. He
48:26
realized that the intuitive woman wasn't
48:29
prepared to buy any of the
48:31
BS he regularly sold at rock-bottom
48:33
prices in volume, volume, volume. Stepping
48:37
closer, Madame Monne said in
48:39
a conspiratorial voice, What
48:42
if I told you there is
48:44
a way to fix something you
48:47
broke? Would
48:49
you grab that chance? Your
48:53
clear logical mind may
48:55
think I'm crazy lady
48:57
with crystals, potions and
48:59
shrunken heads who believes
49:01
in magic. But
49:04
what if time and space
49:07
were nothing more than a
49:09
human construct? Eh?
49:12
Men's zane and futile attempt
49:15
to bring order to chaos.
49:19
And what if I
49:21
told you that there
49:23
are some things that
49:25
exist beyond our mortal
49:27
boundaries? Go
49:30
on, Broderick said. That
49:33
object in your hand is
49:36
a key to the door
49:38
that opens up to that
49:40
plane, Madame Monne said.
49:43
The people who have used
49:46
the talisman have suffered about
49:48
the same number of regrets
49:50
as anyone else. But
49:53
for them, there was always
49:56
the one wound that refused
49:58
to heal. They
50:01
felt no obligation to fix
50:03
the world, nor
50:06
did they possess the ability to
50:08
do so. Their
50:11
needs were personal, painful.
50:14
They wanted
50:17
to return and make
50:19
a better investment to
50:21
prevent their family's bankruptcy.
50:25
They wanted to save their
50:27
brother from suicide, or step
50:30
to their left instead of their
50:33
right to avoid tripping an LED.
50:37
Once the talism served this
50:40
purpose, they brought it back
50:43
and went on with their
50:45
happier lives. Brother
50:48
clung fiercely to the reality he
50:50
believed in. Are
50:52
you trying to play me? Play
50:55
you? No.
50:59
I'm attempting to offer you
51:01
a different past for a
51:04
different future. A
51:06
new trajectory if you will.
51:10
Oh, I see. And this
51:12
wonderful opportunity costs how much? Oh,
51:15
if I act now, will you send me
51:17
a second stone at half price? It
51:20
will cost you nothing.
51:23
Madamona replied. Nothing,
51:26
Broderick asked suspiciously. That's
51:29
right. There. Nothing
51:33
at first. Oh,
51:35
here we go. Broderick said,
51:37
rolling his eyes, mocking her. Hear
51:40
me out, Madamona said.
51:44
I'll let you borrow the
51:46
talisman and try it out
51:48
for a few days, free
51:50
of charge. But
51:53
first, you must
51:55
mister how to skillfully and
51:57
safely use it. For
52:00
that, I'll send you on
52:02
a trial run. Think
52:05
of a time that might
52:07
be fun to experience. A
52:10
moment from your early childhood.
52:13
Your first kiss. Or
52:16
an important moment in history.
52:20
Interact with the past
52:22
but change nothing yet.
52:25
A benign visit will teach
52:27
you how to be gentle
52:29
with the talisman until you
52:32
learn to control its power.
52:35
Only then will you be
52:37
competent enough to make the
52:39
changes you've earned. You
52:42
said the others who tested the talisman brought
52:45
it back. What happens
52:47
if I don't? Broderick asked. This
52:50
stone works its own type
52:52
of magic. Madam Mona
52:55
said. It
52:57
always finds its way home.
53:00
Spooky. Alright, how does
53:02
it work? First, you
53:05
must tell me your name.
53:08
Broderick O'Connor. Broderick
53:11
O'Connor. I
53:14
need you to listen
53:16
very, very carefully. You
53:19
must follow my instructions to
53:22
the letter. Hold
53:25
the talisman tightly between your
53:27
hands and close your eyes.
53:31
Clutching the stone, Broderick strained his
53:33
eyes and a tight squint. As
53:36
he listened to Madam Mona continue her
53:38
instructions, he noticed her
53:40
voice sounded lighter and more distant, as
53:43
though his mind was hearing the words
53:45
rather than his ears. As
53:48
you feel yourself going
53:50
further into a relaxed
53:52
state, she whispered,
53:55
imagine the period you
53:58
want to return to. When
54:01
you experience sounds, tastes
54:04
and smells from that
54:06
location and time, open
54:08
your eyes and
54:12
you will be there. Make
54:15
the most of your visit
54:17
because the talisman will not
54:19
allow you to return to
54:21
that event. It's
54:24
a one and done proposition.
54:28
Lastly, ensure the
54:30
talisman is protected.
54:33
Perhaps by placing it in
54:36
a pocket to avoid losing
54:38
it. Then
54:40
her voice shifted to a somber tone.
54:43
Now Mr. Connor, you
54:46
have to focus here because
54:49
this part is the most
54:52
critical. Do
54:54
not remain anywhere for
54:56
too long. Ten
54:59
minutes at the most. To
55:03
return, have the
55:05
talisman firmly clutched again
55:07
between your hands. It
55:10
can't be in your pocket or
55:12
in one hand. If
55:15
you don't perfectly repeat
55:17
the ritual, you
55:20
will be a prisoner of that
55:22
moment. Condemned to
55:24
an eternity where you play
55:26
out the same scene over
55:29
and over again. A
55:32
world without end, amen.
55:37
Once you're satisfied with the
55:39
stones of intensity, bring
55:42
it back to me. If
55:45
you wish to buy it,
55:47
we will negotiate a fair
55:49
exchange. could
56:00
change and become the man she yearned
56:02
for was his immediate thought. "'But
56:04
what if I goof up? I can't
56:07
go back and try again,' he
56:09
worried. "'Or could I?'
56:13
Broderick turned his attention to completing the
56:15
test run. He
56:17
took a couple of beats and said,
56:19
"'I'm ready.' "'Then
56:21
begin,' Madamona said.
56:25
He later contemplated time travel into
56:28
the 1980s, a decade
56:30
of eclectic fashion and the birth of
56:32
music videos. However,
56:34
he recollected that the 80s
56:36
were also marked by undeniable
56:38
unpleasantness. I ran Contra,
56:40
AIDS, and the rise of Huey Lewis
56:42
in the news. "'Let's
56:44
move a little further back,' he
56:47
thought. He formed
56:49
a strong mental version of the Vietnam protest
56:51
back in the 1960s. He
56:55
thought about a history class in high school
56:57
where he had learned about the turbulent era.
57:00
He recalled viewing old black-and-white
57:02
footage of war protests, soldiers
57:04
in jungles, and the assassination
57:06
of influential people. Soon,
57:09
Broderick experienced a surge of
57:11
fear and exhilaration as
57:13
he felt himself being pulled backward, then
57:16
fired forward like he had been
57:18
launched from a giant invisible slingshot.
57:21
As Broderick was propelled forward, he
57:23
heard music and vocals. "'Stop,
57:26
hey, what's that song? Everybody
57:29
look what's going down.'" Broderick
57:33
recognized the lyrics from a song that his
57:35
grandfather used to play on the stereo. He
57:38
recalled that the title of the song is
57:40
for what it's worth by a band called
57:43
Buffalo Springfield. Behind the
57:45
music, voices were shouting. Many
57:48
detected the pungent smell of sweat and hot asphalt
57:51
and felt the summer heat. With
57:53
Broderick opened his eyes, he was standing
57:55
in a mob of angry young protesters.
57:59
Many of them were carried out. and anti-war signs.
58:01
A long-haired shirtless twenty-something man handed
58:04
him a sign that read, 1-2-3-4
58:07
You Can Shove Your Stupid
58:09
War. Broderick
58:11
slipped the talisman into a pocket of
58:13
the faded tattered jeans he was now
58:15
wearing. He soon
58:17
regretted his hasty choice of locations.
58:20
There was too much anger and hatred. Nautious
58:23
body odor. Why didn't
58:26
I choose wolf stock for pity's sake?
58:28
he wondered. It's where you
58:30
learned that the best things in life
58:32
are free, especially hippy sex. Broderick
58:36
was overwhelmed at first, but when
58:38
his mind accepted that he was
58:40
actually taking part in a sixties
58:42
protest, he became enlivened. For
58:44
the next few minutes he marched,
58:46
yelled, and gave the finger to
58:48
some anti-protesters lining the sidewalks. Broderick
58:51
was enjoying the experience until the group
58:53
rounded the corner and met with a
58:55
brigade of ticked off police. The
58:58
protesters armed themselves with signs
59:00
that contained crappy poetry. The
59:03
cops had guns, billy clubs, tear
59:05
gas, fierce dogs, and fire hoses.
59:08
Yep, seen enough, Broderick said.
59:11
He dropped his sign and removed the
59:14
talisman from his pocket. Thankful
59:16
for having paid attention to the shopkeeper,
59:18
he held the stone relic in both
59:20
hands, closing his eyes. His
59:23
thoughts were solely on the store he had
59:25
left from. Soon
59:27
his ethereal body was flying through
59:29
space again. Broderick
59:31
smelled strawberry incense and felt the
59:33
wooden floor beneath his feet. Relief
59:36
washed over him as he opened his eyes
59:38
and realized he was back in the presence.
59:42
Madamona was sitting near the front
59:44
door behind a glass counter, reading
59:46
a copy of Glamour magazine. Welcome
59:49
back, she nonchalantly said, as
59:51
if Broderick's trip was an every
59:54
hour on the hour occurrence. How
59:57
long was I gone? Broderick breathlessly
59:59
asked. I cannot
1:00:01
say for certain. Perhaps
1:00:04
a few minutes, maybe
1:00:06
more," she said. Did
1:00:08
I disappear? Yes,
1:00:11
you did. Where did
1:00:13
you go? The sixties,
1:00:16
a Vietnam protest march. Seriously?
1:00:20
Madamona looked befuddled, as his brother
1:00:22
had selected a stupid and unusual
1:00:25
place. It was
1:00:27
just an arbitrary time that popped
1:00:29
into my head, Broderick said defensively.
1:00:32
Okay, she replied. Oh
1:00:34
yeah? Well, where the heck would you have gone?
1:00:38
How should I know? It
1:00:40
was your space trip, Major
1:00:42
Tom. Broderick looked
1:00:44
in awe at the wondrous magical stone
1:00:47
still clasped in his hands. I'll
1:00:49
take it. Don't get
1:00:52
ahead of yourself, Broderick
1:00:54
O'Connor. As
1:00:57
I said, I'll allow you
1:00:59
to try it. But
1:01:02
it's also a trial period for
1:01:04
the talisman to test you. You
1:01:08
have to demonstrate responsibility
1:01:11
and respect. Respect
1:01:14
for what? You,
1:01:16
Broderick sneered. No,
1:01:19
for the talisman, Madamona
1:01:22
said cryptically. Borrow
1:01:25
it. Use
1:01:27
it wisely. Fix your
1:01:29
problem. Don't
1:01:31
lose the talisman. Return
1:01:34
here with it. We'll
1:01:37
see if you still want to own
1:01:39
it. Broderick absorbed
1:01:42
her words for a moment. Deal,
1:01:44
he said. He pocketed
1:01:47
the stone, then went to the entrance
1:01:49
and stopped. I'll see you
1:01:51
soon, he said over his shoulder. Then
1:01:54
his face became stern, a
1:01:56
glint of menace in his eyes. But
1:01:59
be warned. If this thing
1:02:01
doesn't work as promised, I'll
1:02:03
be seeing you sooner, and
1:02:06
I won't be a happy customer." His
1:02:09
threat clear, Broderick flung open the front
1:02:11
door and left with the stone. Whatever
1:02:14
you say, Mr.
1:02:17
Broderick O'Connor," Madamona
1:02:20
muttered before returning to her
1:02:22
magazine. It's
1:02:31
time to turn off the lights
1:02:34
and turn on the dark. This
1:02:45
is Chilling Tales for Dark
1:02:47
Nights. Good evening, listener.
1:02:50
I'm Steve Taylor, your
1:02:52
host to a horror anthology
1:02:54
podcast, where we ask
1:02:56
you to depart from your
1:02:58
safe perception of reality to
1:03:01
descend with us into the
1:03:03
frightening depth and dark corners
1:03:05
of twisted imaginations. With
1:03:07
carefully curated original tales of
1:03:09
terror each week, our deepest
1:03:11
rooted fears are brought to
1:03:14
the forefront by a diverse
1:03:16
cast of voice talent and
1:03:18
masterfully eerie sound design that
1:03:20
bring these stories to life.
1:03:23
We'll give you tales of unnerving
1:03:26
encounters with the occult, harrowing
1:03:28
hauntings, and sinister
1:03:31
seances that show
1:03:33
just how darkness knows
1:03:35
no bounds. If
1:03:38
you're like us here at Chilling
1:03:40
Tales and enjoy feeling your stomach
1:03:42
filling with dread as dastardly demons
1:03:44
dance in your head, make
1:03:47
sure to check out Chilling Tales
1:03:49
for Dark Nights on Apple Podcasts,
1:03:51
Spotify, or wherever you get your
1:03:54
podcasts. To subscribe now to always
1:03:56
be the first to enjoy the
1:03:59
horror. Or a show. Listen
1:04:15
closely. I
1:04:17
might just know what you're looking for. Maybe
1:04:21
it's a little bit more excitement in your life.
1:04:24
And don't let the system to
1:04:27
get the blood pumping again. Just
1:04:30
the smallest, tiniest
1:04:32
taste. Something
1:04:34
to dilate pupils. Do
1:04:38
allow me to welcome you to the horror of you.
1:04:42
A little getaway I know about. A
1:04:45
place with scenic overlooks. With
1:04:47
fresh terror on tap. Chilling
1:04:50
even the most discerning connoisseurs of
1:04:52
the mok'af to the bone. Join
1:04:54
me each week to get all
1:04:57
of the ghastly, gory and grotesque
1:04:59
stories that I've handpicked from the
1:05:01
works of previously published and indie
1:05:04
authors. By subscribing
1:05:06
to Horror Hill on Apple
1:05:08
Podcasts, Spotify, or
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wherever you prefer to get your horror effects.
1:05:14
My name is Jason. You
1:05:16
can take my word for it. Oh,
1:05:20
then remember. It's
1:05:22
a little story. Right?
1:05:39
Broderick was orbiting around the talisman line
1:05:41
on his living room coffee table as
1:05:43
though it were the sun. He
1:05:47
gnawed on his thumbnail. A habit he
1:05:49
had whenever he was perplexed or had
1:05:51
a good idea, which was seldom.
1:05:54
Do it. Do it. Just
1:05:57
do it. He kept repeating.
1:06:00
This had been going on for nearly an hour.
1:06:04
Can I do this? He
1:06:06
asked himself. I need more
1:06:08
time to think. I've only
1:06:10
got one shot. I can't afford to screw
1:06:12
this up. Broderick
1:06:14
was about to complete another rotation when
1:06:16
an idea struck him. I'll
1:06:18
need to take another test run. I'll
1:06:21
try going back in time a little farther
1:06:23
than before. Now
1:06:25
how far back do I want to go? That
1:06:28
graduation trip to the beach with my buds?
1:06:31
My first frat party? Nah,
1:06:34
let's really see what this bad boy'll do.
1:06:37
Go big or go home, Brody. No
1:06:40
one could accuse Broderick of not being
1:06:42
creative. For him, it
1:06:44
was an essential building block in the
1:06:46
art of line with ease and plausible
1:06:49
conviction. After thinking
1:06:51
it over, Broderick impressed himself with
1:06:53
a bold and brilliant idea. It
1:06:56
came to him while he was looking at a
1:06:58
painting that his parents had given him as a
1:07:00
housewarming gift. It depicted a
1:07:02
revolutionary war battle. Smoke
1:07:05
billowed from cannons and muskets. Fearlessly,
1:07:08
men charged at each other with bayonets
1:07:10
at the ready. As
1:07:12
horses reared on their hind legs and
1:07:14
the ethereal battle missed. Let's
1:07:17
get it on! Broderick shouted
1:07:19
like a boxing announcer. He
1:07:21
picked up the talisman and began the
1:07:23
well-rehearsed riot. Everything
1:07:26
around him faded as his mind thought of
1:07:28
nothing but the battle scene. Broderick
1:07:31
felt propelled through time once more. Soon
1:07:34
he tasted the metallic tang of
1:07:36
spent ammunition and felt warm squishy
1:07:38
mud under his feet. He
1:07:41
heard the sound of victory yells juxtaposed
1:07:43
with the screams of the dinen and
1:07:45
wounded. When Broderick opened
1:07:47
his eyes, he was in the scene depicted
1:07:49
in the painting. The military
1:07:52
attire he wore revealed his status as
1:07:54
a member of the Continental Army. He
1:07:57
tucked a mystical stone inside one of his
1:07:59
jacket pockets. Holding
1:08:01
the musket, it occurred to him he had never
1:08:03
shot a gun in his life. He
1:08:06
had certainly never taken a life before,
1:08:08
unless you counted his pleasant daydreams regarding
1:08:11
the twid and cubicle next to his
1:08:13
own. The loser never
1:08:15
stopped talking. Bringing
1:08:17
a violent end to a dunce's incessant
1:08:20
drone that had always filled Broderick's heart
1:08:22
with sweet contentment. However, his
1:08:24
verve didn't transfer to his
1:08:26
current situation. All
1:08:29
Broderick could think to do was to
1:08:31
run around yelling, hoping he didn't get
1:08:33
plugged by a round bullet or lance
1:08:35
with a British bayonet. When
1:08:37
a whistling cannonball vaporized the head of
1:08:39
the soldier a few feet to his
1:08:42
left, Broderick was ready to bring the
1:08:44
experiment to its necessary conclusion. He
1:08:47
ditched a rifle, pulled the talisman from
1:08:49
the top pocket of his grimy ragged
1:08:51
coat, and headed for home. Broderick
1:08:56
arrived back at his apartment, standing in
1:08:58
the spot from which he had left.
1:09:01
He was pale and shaken. Once
1:09:03
his nerves settled, he roared in
1:09:05
the triumphant manner of a successful
1:09:07
scientist. And thus it
1:09:09
is proved! Broderick
1:09:12
planned to sleep on it for a night,
1:09:14
but decided he was as ready as he'd
1:09:16
ever be to visit Lila. The
1:09:19
result of his experiments confirmed
1:09:21
his capability to regulate travel
1:09:23
distances. In light
1:09:25
of this, he reasoned that if he
1:09:28
made a mistake during his first visit
1:09:30
to Lila, he could continue to regress
1:09:32
in their relationship until he achieved his
1:09:34
objective. Remember, he
1:09:37
instructed himself, don't
1:09:39
rush it. Begin with how
1:09:41
sorry you are for being selfish and
1:09:44
insensitive. Keep it simple, and
1:09:46
keep in mind that if necessary you can go
1:09:49
back as far as you need and take another
1:09:51
stab at this. The
1:09:53
last thought, stab at this, reminded
1:09:55
Broderick of how close he had
1:09:57
come to being the marshmallow portion
1:09:59
of some redcoats' cosmic s'more.
1:10:02
He shivered and swallowed a thick gulp
1:10:04
of spit. Alright,
1:10:07
let's do this. Broderick
1:10:10
lowered himself into the plush
1:10:12
comfortable couch that Lila had
1:10:14
generously or, perhaps accidentally, bequeathed
1:10:16
him. He relaxed
1:10:18
and recalled the vivid memory of the
1:10:20
night Lila had left him for Ted.
1:10:23
Then, for reasons he didn't understand,
1:10:26
he started humming the song, Livin' La
1:10:28
Vida Loca. He
1:10:30
re-centered himself and picked up where he had
1:10:32
left off. Following
1:10:35
the prescribed ceremony, Broderick felt a comfortable
1:10:37
couch give way to a hard metal
1:10:39
chair in the coffee house that he
1:10:41
and Lila had frequented. He
1:10:44
inhaled the scintillating smell of
1:10:46
freshly brewed and unconscionably overpriced
1:10:48
coffees. He heard
1:10:50
acoustic Americana music coming through the
1:10:53
shop sound system, as well as
1:10:55
the undecipherable chatter of the surrounding
1:10:58
patrons. Broderick didn't
1:11:00
open his eyes right away. A great
1:11:03
sorrow rested on his heart. He
1:11:05
felt the lump forming in his throat and
1:11:08
tears brimming in his eyes. He
1:11:10
hadn't considered what his reaction would be when he
1:11:12
opened his eyes and saw the love of his
1:11:14
life sitting in front of him again. He braced
1:11:18
himself as he felt the comfort of
1:11:20
her small delicate hand touching his own
1:11:23
and her captivated, mellifluous voice.
1:11:26
Broderick, are you okay? He
1:11:29
opened his eyes and did his best not
1:11:31
to appear too emotional. Yeah,
1:11:34
babe, he said. I just
1:11:37
blanked out there for a minute. You
1:11:39
looked like you were napping. I
1:11:42
thought that maybe I'd bored you to death. No,
1:11:45
no, I'm good. Broderick said.
1:11:49
I need to say something to you. I
1:11:52
need to tell you. I
1:11:54
realized that I've been a total jerk. I've
1:11:57
taken you for granted for too long, I. There's
1:12:01
something I need to tell you too, and
1:12:03
based on where I think you're about to
1:12:06
take this conversation, now
1:12:08
should be the time." His
1:12:10
heart plummeted to his churning stomach. "'No,
1:12:14
Angel, don't. Please, Lila.'"
1:12:17
"'Babe, this just isn't working
1:12:19
out,' she said. I
1:12:21
know you're trying to make things right, but even
1:12:25
if you'd been perfect, this
1:12:27
would still be the end for us. The
1:12:30
thing is, I'm in love with someone
1:12:32
else. I
1:12:34
need someone I can have a committed
1:12:36
relationship with. This
1:12:38
isn't a spur-of-the-moment thing. I've
1:12:41
felt it for a while now." A
1:12:44
sense of vulnerability was supplanting the bravado
1:12:46
that Broderick had brought to the failing
1:12:48
plan. His mouth was
1:12:51
thickening with nervous spit while the tears
1:12:53
he was fighting threatened to reveal his
1:12:55
pain. Gone was
1:12:57
his pride, his dignity. He
1:13:00
didn't care about the looks that some of
1:13:02
the nerdy coffee swillers were shooting at him.
1:13:06
Realizing that this trip was doomed to
1:13:08
failure, a sense of hopelessness
1:13:10
and brokenness engulfed him. Despite
1:13:13
his clever planning and cockiness, he
1:13:15
was going to lose her anyway. Desperate,
1:13:18
Broderick used the only tool he had
1:13:20
left. Pleadin. "'Tell
1:13:23
me what to do,' he begged. "'Whatever
1:13:26
it takes to make you happy, I'll do it.
1:13:29
Whoever you need me to be, I'll be
1:13:31
that person. Lyla, this
1:13:33
isn't an infatuation. I
1:13:36
need you. Please, babe, please
1:13:38
give me a little more time to show you I
1:13:40
can change, then I can make you
1:13:42
happy.'" "'Broderick, if
1:13:46
you really want to make me happy,
1:13:48
then you need to let me go, so I—" "'Oh,
1:13:51
crap,' Broderick realized. I'm
1:13:54
taking too long. If I don't
1:13:56
leave, I'll be stuck here listening to the Indigo Girls
1:13:59
and having my My heart ripped out with an
1:14:01
ice cream scoop forever. I
1:14:03
gotta go, Lila," Broderick blurted. What?
1:14:06
Lila asked with a look of
1:14:08
mild confusion and annoyance. I'll
1:14:11
come back. I'll come back for you, but
1:14:13
it's gotta be later. I mean earlier. I
1:14:16
mean, aw, Jude, this was a sign of
1:14:18
fries. I'll be back. Be back
1:14:20
for me later. Earlier? What
1:14:23
are you even talking about? Lila asked.
1:14:27
Broderick realized he had to leave things where
1:14:29
they were for the time being. He
1:14:32
lifted the talisman he had been holding under the
1:14:34
table and did the dance. Broderick,
1:14:36
what is that thing? Are you conking
1:14:39
out of me again? So help me,
1:14:41
God. Broderick began to jaunt
1:14:43
home. Soon
1:14:46
Broderick felt the warm embrace of the sofa.
1:14:50
He heard the hum of the air conditioning forcing
1:14:52
its way out of the floor vent. Once
1:14:55
he knew he had successfully completed the journey,
1:14:57
he opened his eyes. He
1:14:59
felt so overwhelmed by grief that he
1:15:01
thought he might vomit. However,
1:15:04
the melancholy at his failure melted under
1:15:06
the brightness of his knowledge that he
1:15:08
could cheat time and head back to
1:15:10
Lila again. Broderick
1:15:13
acknowledged and agreed that he had only
1:15:15
one chance to alter an event, but
1:15:18
what he was talking about was
1:15:20
changing the outcome under different circumstances
1:15:22
at different times. He
1:15:25
had already demonstrated the ability to go
1:15:27
backwards as far as he wanted, but
1:15:30
first he needed to lie back,
1:15:32
pull himself together and strategize his
1:15:34
next attempt. This time
1:15:37
he had armed himself with something he neglected
1:15:39
to bring along on the first trip, an
1:15:42
unbelievable amount of BS. The
1:15:45
only question was where in time should
1:15:47
he revisit? After
1:15:49
some thought, he picked the date. It
1:15:52
was the night that he had asked Lila to move in
1:15:54
with him. He had taken
1:15:56
some coaxing at first, but she had
1:15:58
relented despite her hesitation. Broderick
1:16:01
wanted to alleviate the doubts she had
1:16:03
back then. He concluded
1:16:05
that those lingering doubts were the cause
1:16:07
of the subsequent pain. Those
1:16:10
in his unpleasant personality traits. Broderick's
1:16:14
plan was to adopt a new persona,
1:16:17
one in which he was patient instead of
1:16:19
pushy, a listener instead
1:16:21
of someone who dominated the conversation,
1:16:24
and sophisticated instead of crass. He
1:16:28
hoped Lila would love him more deeply, and
1:16:31
accept this new version of Broderick as
1:16:33
the soulmate she wanted. And
1:16:35
most importantly, no Ted.
1:16:39
Broderick practiced his lines, body language, and
1:16:41
facial expressions in front of the mirror.
1:16:44
To enhance the experience, he imagined
1:16:47
himself in a stylish brown sports
1:16:49
coat, crisp white shirt, well-fitted blue
1:16:51
jeans, and new dress loafers. It
1:16:55
wouldn't do to show up this time in
1:16:57
a Green Day t-shirt with wrinkled jeans and
1:16:59
some grungy white sneakers. Broderick
1:17:02
was prepared for takeoff when it occurred to
1:17:05
him that some cologne might help to compliment
1:17:07
his image. The problem was
1:17:09
he had never worn any because he had
1:17:11
never owned any. When
1:17:14
it came to his personal hygiene, he
1:17:16
figured a morning application of deodorant fulfilled
1:17:18
his part of the social contract. He
1:17:21
also flossed three times a week. Surely
1:17:24
that counted for something. Broderick
1:17:27
smiled as a brilliant flash of
1:17:29
ingenuity struck him. He
1:17:31
went to the laundry closet, grabbed a
1:17:33
dryer sheet that contained a fragrance called
1:17:36
Lemon Meadow, and used it to wipe
1:17:38
down his entire body. Once
1:17:40
the stage was set, Broderick dropped onto
1:17:42
the sofa, took the talisman in
1:17:45
his hands, and pulled every memory
1:17:47
of that night into his mind's eye. Then—
1:17:52
Why, thank you. You look quite
1:17:54
nice yourself. Lila said from her side
1:17:56
of the restaurant table. You
1:17:59
know, I— I don't think I've ever seen
1:18:01
you this spruced up. You
1:18:03
really clean up nice, kiddo. I
1:18:05
did it for you, Broderick cooed with
1:18:08
a slice of smiles as he placed
1:18:10
the talisman in his pants pocket. Lila
1:18:13
leaned forward over the table and sniffed.
1:18:16
Did you put on some cologne for me as well?
1:18:19
Why, yes, I did. Do
1:18:22
you like it? I guess
1:18:24
so. It kinda makes you smell
1:18:26
like a lemon tree or
1:18:29
dryer lint. I can't tell. Lila,
1:18:33
I want to talk to you about an idea I
1:18:35
have. I hope that it excites
1:18:37
you as much as it does me. Broderick
1:18:40
began his carefully crafted speech.
1:18:43
He laid out an eloquent statesman
1:18:45
like soliloquy about the importance
1:18:47
of commitment. His lawyerly
1:18:50
summation concluded with asking Lila to
1:18:52
share his life, his love and
1:18:54
his home. Broderick
1:18:56
delivered the heartfelt appeal with
1:18:59
a robust theatrical style reminiscent
1:19:01
of Sir John Gilgood in
1:19:03
the Shakespearean tragedy with
1:19:05
a hint of Tom Cruise and Jerry Maguire.
1:19:09
After he completed his sales pitch, Broderick
1:19:11
gave himself a mental pat on the
1:19:13
back. Booyah! His
1:19:15
inner voice cheered. Drop
1:19:17
the mic, cue the sunset and roll
1:19:20
the credits, baby. Cause daddy just put
1:19:22
it to bed. With
1:19:24
the most realistic tears he could muster,
1:19:26
Broderick took Lila's hands in his. I'll
1:19:29
make you happy for the rest of your life
1:19:32
and any to come. What
1:19:34
do you say? Lila with
1:19:36
a soft twinkle in her eyes waited for
1:19:38
a moment before giving him an answer. In
1:19:41
a tone devoid of enthusiasm, she
1:19:43
said. No, I don't
1:19:45
think so. Broderick's
1:19:48
fawning eyes and cherub facial expression
1:19:50
didn't change as he said. Wait,
1:19:53
what? Look Broderick,
1:19:56
I thought you were a man who's comfortable in his
1:19:58
own skin. Yes? Sometimes
1:20:00
you can be short-tempered, immature,
1:20:02
and narcissistic. But
1:20:04
I've learned to embrace you despite these
1:20:06
flaws. Now you're trying to
1:20:08
be someone you're not just to please me. You
1:20:12
came here tonight looking and smelling like
1:20:14
a metrosexual who got lost in a
1:20:16
lemon orchard and talking
1:20:18
like a grippy romance novelist. It
1:20:21
isn't you. It's a forged version
1:20:23
of you. For example,
1:20:25
right now, you look like
1:20:27
you're so emotionally fragile that you might cry
1:20:30
at any second. That's not
1:20:32
the Broderick I fell for. I'm
1:20:34
sorry. But if this is really
1:20:36
who you are, then it might
1:20:38
be better just to give each other some space for
1:20:40
a while. Besides, it's not
1:20:42
like you'd notice I'm gone. You
1:20:45
barely acknowledge me when I'm here. Broderick
1:20:48
felt like the north end of a southbound
1:20:50
mule. How in the heck did
1:20:52
this plan fail? He wondered. The
1:20:55
clothes, the tender, caring person, the
1:20:57
stupid, lemony, fresh dryer sheet for
1:21:00
pity's sake, the
1:21:02
futility of everything he had done to
1:21:04
change this one thing enraged him. Broderick
1:21:07
sprang from his chair and allowed
1:21:09
Lila, the waiters, and the other
1:21:12
proud Americans in the establishment to
1:21:14
be sucked into his profanity-laced, red-faced,
1:21:17
lost-in-the-case swirl and vortex of
1:21:19
shame and fury. By
1:21:21
the time he ran out of steam,
1:21:23
the cowardly patrons had evacuated the scene.
1:21:26
The braver ones who remained disregarded
1:21:28
Broderick's outburst as nothing more than dinner
1:21:30
and a show. Lila,
1:21:33
who had sat through the entire performance
1:21:35
with eyes as wide as the Rio
1:21:37
Grande, began slowly clapping. She
1:21:40
stood and addressed the entire room. And
1:21:43
now, ladies and gentlemen, fresh
1:21:45
off his Tony Award-winning role for Best
1:21:47
Actress in the comedy or drama, it's
1:21:50
none other than Broderick, the
1:21:52
lemon-scented monkey's-ass. Far
1:21:55
from done, she added, thank
1:21:57
you, Broderick, for all of the good times
1:21:59
along with tonight. not stirring performance.
1:22:02
Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm calling a friend
1:22:04
to pick me up. Someone
1:22:06
who's more mature than you and I might
1:22:08
add better smelling." "'Lila!'
1:22:11
Broderick yelled as she began
1:22:13
walking toward the entrance. "'After
1:22:16
everything I've done to make you love me,
1:22:18
don't you have one kind thing to say?'
1:22:21
Lila stopped short and turned. "'Yeah,
1:22:24
Broderick, here's some kind advice. You
1:22:28
know that recipe you concocted for
1:22:30
your world-famous cucumber and raisin casserole?
1:22:33
Well, it's an abomination before the
1:22:35
Lord. Burn it.'" Deciding
1:22:38
to do the rest of her talking with
1:22:40
her walking, she turned and stomped her way
1:22:42
to the restaurant's front door. Broderick
1:22:45
was numb. He couldn't
1:22:47
think, couldn't speak. He
1:22:49
thought she loved his cucumber and raisin
1:22:52
casserole. And if he
1:22:54
thought this moment was the zenith of his
1:22:56
humiliation, he would have been wrong. Very
1:22:59
wrong. When Lila
1:23:01
got to the door before she could
1:23:03
push it open, a handsome young man
1:23:05
with a square jaw, crystal blue eyes,
1:23:07
a thick head of wavy brown hair,
1:23:10
and movie star-good looks opened it for
1:23:12
her. "'I was in
1:23:14
the bar and saw what happened,' said
1:23:16
the lean, tanned, and effortlessly charming young
1:23:18
man. "'Actually, it was probably
1:23:20
picked up by the International Space Station.'
1:23:23
At that, Lila's rage-hardened face
1:23:26
softened, and she laughed. "'Anyhow,'
1:23:29
the young stranger said, "'I was
1:23:32
just heading out to meet some friends who were
1:23:34
having a small rooftop party. I could
1:23:36
give you a ride home on the way, if you want.' "'Sounds
1:23:39
great,' Lila said coquettishly.
1:23:42
"'But that party sounds a little great,
1:23:44
too.' Broderick
1:23:46
stood there dumbfounded as they walked through
1:23:48
the door together. The
1:23:51
restaurant was still and quiet so he
1:23:53
could hear their last exchange. "'Oh,
1:23:55
Lila, by the way,' said the young stranger.
1:23:57
"'Well, hi, Lila, by the way. Pleased to meet
1:23:59
you.' you. I'm Tan." Broderick
1:24:04
slept little that night. He
1:24:07
was sad, angry, and out of ideas.
1:24:09
He remembered a quote by Soren
1:24:12
Kierkegaard, "...there is no
1:24:14
more pitiful state of being that comes about
1:24:16
than when one has to let go of
1:24:18
a future that will never be. No matter
1:24:21
what he did or how far back he
1:24:23
went, there would never be a future with
1:24:25
Lila. It hurt." By
1:24:29
the early afternoon of the next
1:24:31
day, Broderick's growling stomach outmatched his
1:24:33
martyr's desire to starve to death,
1:24:35
so he ventured out. Besides,
1:24:37
his limited trial time with the
1:24:39
callousman was almost up. It
1:24:42
was time to return it. Broderick
1:24:44
took an Uber to the diner he had
1:24:47
eaten at prior to his first visit to
1:24:49
Madame Mona's shop of curiosities. He
1:24:51
ended up being more of a martyr
1:24:54
than expected, leaving half of his turkey
1:24:56
and Havarti sandwich uneaten. He
1:24:58
paid the tab and set out for Madame
1:25:00
Mona's. When
1:25:04
Broderick entered the store, he saw
1:25:06
Madame Mona seated behind the counter
1:25:08
perusing the magazine. Without
1:25:11
looking up, she asked, "...oh,
1:25:14
hello, back already?"
1:25:17
The store was still as empty as the
1:25:19
tomb on Easter morning. Broderick
1:25:21
shuffled over to the counter. He
1:25:24
took the talisman out of his pocket and laid
1:25:26
it on the glass countertop. "...didn't
1:25:29
work," he said solemnly. "...of
1:25:32
course it did," Madame
1:25:34
Mona said. "...I
1:25:36
saw you take your first
1:25:38
trip." Then she
1:25:40
sniffed the air. "...do
1:25:43
you smell that?" "...smell
1:25:46
what?" "...Lil'mon's
1:25:48
dryer lint." "...oh,
1:25:50
that'd be me. No,
1:25:52
I meant that it didn't help me do what I
1:25:54
wanted to do. I lost
1:25:57
Lila anyway. I should
1:25:59
have listened to you." I only
1:26:01
had one chance to fix things. Getting
1:26:04
creative with the rules to cheat the talisman
1:26:06
is a fool's errand. It
1:26:08
won't stand for it. I
1:26:10
suppose that's fair." Madamona
1:26:13
got up from her stool and walked from behind
1:26:16
the counter to Broderick. "'You're
1:26:18
not the only person who's
1:26:20
had an important moment slip
1:26:23
through their hands,' she
1:26:25
said in a soothing manner. As
1:26:28
you learned, you're not allowed
1:26:30
to try more than once.'
1:26:34
"'What you get is what has to
1:26:36
be. At
1:26:38
least you had the presence of
1:26:40
lying not to stay there for
1:26:43
too long. You
1:26:45
didn't get stuck reliving that
1:26:47
bad moment for all of
1:26:49
eternity. That would've
1:26:52
been the real hell. Now
1:26:55
you can move on with the
1:26:57
knowledge that you've done all you
1:27:00
could to erase your pain. It
1:27:04
seems like you've let
1:27:06
this stone teach you
1:27:08
the importance of boundaries,
1:27:10
humility, and respect.
1:27:14
Do you still want the
1:27:17
talisman?' Broderick
1:27:19
thought for a bit. "'I
1:27:22
don't know,' he woefully replied. Then
1:27:25
the mischievous grin spread across his face
1:27:27
as his ego considered the power he
1:27:29
could wield from the talisman. "'Maybe.'
1:27:34
"'Yeah, why not? Unlike
1:27:36
the others, I could use it to bounce
1:27:38
around history. Maybe I
1:27:40
could seal the stone myself. That's
1:27:42
quite a piece of magic you had there.' Broderick
1:27:46
snatched the talisman from the counter and began flipping it in
1:27:48
his hand like a coin. Madamona's
1:27:51
hand shot out and seized it from
1:27:53
the air just before he could catch
1:27:55
it. "'No,' she
1:27:58
said defiantly. I'm
1:28:00
sorry, did you say no? The
1:28:03
talisman is a sacred
1:28:05
artifact, not a
1:28:07
toy for your amusement. Many
1:28:11
have used it countless
1:28:13
times throughout history, in
1:28:16
spans of time too long
1:28:18
to fathom. I've
1:28:21
only offered the talisman to a
1:28:23
select group of people. Those
1:28:27
who mourn, those
1:28:30
who've wronged others through
1:28:32
cruelty or personal gain,
1:28:36
and those who yearn to
1:28:38
get back something precious that's
1:28:40
been lost. By
1:28:43
offering it to you,
1:28:45
I thought it might
1:28:48
change your cavalier,
1:28:50
impertinent attitude. But
1:28:53
apparently, even it's
1:28:55
not powerful enough.
1:28:58
Like you, there have been
1:29:01
those who have demanded to
1:29:03
possess it, no
1:29:05
matter the cost. Even
1:29:08
after they proved themselves
1:29:10
unworthy. Well,
1:29:13
if you've found worthy people to sell it
1:29:15
to, then how does it keep ending up
1:29:17
back here with you? Broderick indignantly asked. As
1:29:21
I've already explained to you,
1:29:23
when the need
1:29:25
was no more, they
1:29:28
returned the talisman to me. Mr.
1:29:32
O'Connor, instead of,
1:29:35
as you put it, bouncing around
1:29:37
in time. This
1:29:40
talisman can provide you
1:29:42
with something more meaningful.
1:29:45
And keep you from living
1:29:47
a self-centered existence. You
1:29:51
could use it to help the
1:29:53
people in your life who have
1:29:55
also known a regret. Or
1:29:58
you could use it to ensure... your
1:30:01
own personal universe, in
1:30:04
which you always profit and
1:30:06
never lose. Have
1:30:09
you ever stopped to consider
1:30:11
that sometimes it's the
1:30:13
hardest lesson that shape us
1:30:16
into becoming who we are meant
1:30:18
to be?" Broderick
1:30:21
felt the same old ferocity rising in
1:30:23
him. His inner demons encouraged
1:30:25
him to put his foot down and
1:30:28
demand his own way, lest there be
1:30:30
consequences. He brought
1:30:32
his head down, almost touching the small
1:30:34
woman's forehead. "'You
1:30:37
said you find me
1:30:39
cavalier and impertinent," Broderick
1:30:41
hissed. "'You left out
1:30:44
a couple of other descriptions. Determination
1:30:47
and wrath. You
1:30:51
told me not two days ago that
1:30:53
if I was satisfied with the stone
1:30:55
that you'd work out a fair price
1:30:57
for me. I think
1:30:59
now is an appropriate time for that.
1:31:03
See, like me and that rock, you
1:31:06
need to learn about boundaries,
1:31:08
humility, and respect. Here's
1:31:11
what I know and what I don't know.
1:31:14
I know you're going to sell me
1:31:16
that stone. What
1:31:18
I don't know is what's going
1:31:20
to happen if you don't.'" "'That
1:31:23
talisman isn't a sacred artifact.
1:31:26
It's a total screw-up. It
1:31:29
had one task to accomplish and it couldn't
1:31:31
handle it. But I'm
1:31:33
a creative guy. I
1:31:35
can come up with some adjustments. I
1:31:38
think you figured out that I can take
1:31:40
this rock if I want to, but
1:31:42
I believe in being fair. Sell
1:31:45
it to me and I promise that
1:31:47
I won't go back in time and
1:31:49
murder your pregnant whore of a mother.
1:31:52
What say you, all powerful
1:31:54
sous-sayer?' Madam
1:31:57
on his eyes never left Broderick's."
1:32:00
When he finished his blatant threat, she
1:32:03
allowed an impish grin of her own to paint
1:32:05
her face. All
1:32:07
rise in, she said. You
1:32:11
drive a hard bargain,
1:32:13
Mr. O'Connor. I
1:32:16
suppose it was going to
1:32:18
pass to another owner at
1:32:21
some point. I
1:32:23
told you I would sell
1:32:26
it to you and so I shall.
1:32:30
Broderick's Smurf, that's more
1:32:33
like it. Well, I'm
1:32:36
listening. I'm
1:32:38
a purveyor of unusual
1:32:41
objects, but I'm
1:32:43
also a businesswoman, Madam
1:32:46
owner said. How else
1:32:48
could I afford to keep this
1:32:50
shop open? After
1:32:53
all, you can
1:32:55
only make so much by
1:32:57
selling healing crystals and love
1:33:00
potions. Well,
1:33:02
aren't you a little
1:33:04
hypocrite? Broderick slightly asked.
1:33:07
Okay, I'll bite. You
1:33:09
said the price would be fair,
1:33:11
but by fair I'm thinking you're
1:33:14
asking for something other than money.
1:33:16
What a clever boy! she
1:33:18
mewed. I
1:33:21
want you to use
1:33:24
it one more time
1:33:26
for me. There's something
1:33:28
I'd like from the past.
1:33:31
Something I'd love to add
1:33:34
to my inventory. If
1:33:37
you want it so bad, why haven't you gone
1:33:39
back and gotten it yourself? Sorry
1:33:42
to say, I'm not
1:33:45
as adventurous as some people.
1:33:48
Besides, if I didn't make
1:33:50
it back, who would feed
1:33:53
my cats? How
1:33:55
many cats do you have? Madam
1:33:57
owner paused. I
1:34:01
didn't expect you to ask," she
1:34:04
said sheepishly. "'All
1:34:06
right, all right. I
1:34:09
don't have any stupid kids.
1:34:12
I'm just cowardly. Sue
1:34:15
me.'" Roderick
1:34:17
snickered, shaking his head in disbelief.
1:34:19
"'Kay, what is it you want?'
1:34:22
he asked. "'A
1:34:24
sliver of wood from
1:34:26
the cross of Christ,'
1:34:28
Madam Mona said. "'You
1:34:31
mean Jesus Christ?'
1:34:34
"'No, Karl Christ.
1:34:37
Yes, I'd like
1:34:40
you to travel back to the day
1:34:42
of the cross of Hygshun and bring
1:34:44
me a small piece of
1:34:46
the cross.' "'That's
1:34:48
it?' Roderick asked with relief. "'Nothing
1:34:52
else, like maybe a Roman toga
1:34:54
or ten dollars worth of shekels?
1:34:57
Nothing like that?' "'No,' Madam
1:34:59
Mona said. "'Just
1:35:01
if one bit of wood, I
1:35:05
have a use for it.' Roderick
1:35:08
clapped his hands together and again
1:35:10
used his booming announcer's voice. "'Let's
1:35:12
get it on!' "'Okay.
1:35:16
Come look at this.' She
1:35:20
turned and walked across the sill's floor at
1:35:22
a quick clip, her purple
1:35:24
moo-moo billowing behind her. They
1:35:27
ended up in front of a tall glass
1:35:29
display. The unique
1:35:31
and disparate items engrossed Roderick.
1:35:34
"'Now what if we got here?' he
1:35:36
asked, as his eyes swept over the
1:35:38
collection of valuable relics. His
1:35:40
eyes settled on a button. "'Where's
1:35:43
that from?' Madam
1:35:45
Mona enjoyed the look of fascination
1:35:47
on Roderick's face. "'I
1:35:50
have that button taken off
1:35:52
the coat of George Washington
1:35:54
during the winter of 1777
1:35:56
at Valley Falls.' That's
1:36:01
the real deal? Seriously? Seriously.
1:36:06
Get out of my room," Broderick exclaimed
1:36:08
with an air of excitement. And
1:36:11
that?" he asked, pointing at an
1:36:13
ornate dagger. "'That's
1:36:15
a sacrificial dagger from
1:36:17
about 2000 B.C.
1:36:20
that was retrieved by
1:36:22
one of my travelers. It
1:36:26
belonged to a Mayan
1:36:28
tribal chief." "'Is
1:36:30
that what I think it is?' Broderick
1:36:33
pressed his forehead to the front of the
1:36:35
glass case to confirm what he thought he
1:36:37
was seeing. "'That's right,'
1:36:39
Madam Mona said. "'That
1:36:42
is the crown of thorns
1:36:45
worn by Christ, and
1:36:47
those are the three nails used
1:36:50
to hold him on the cross.
1:36:53
As you can see, they're
1:36:56
large and slightly bent. Definitely
1:37:00
post-crucifixion. And
1:37:03
by the way, stop steaming up
1:37:05
the glass. I
1:37:07
have to clean these things, you know.'
1:37:10
"'I said it before and I'll repeat it now,'
1:37:13
Broderick chuckled. "'You are
1:37:15
one careless, clumsy, and irresponsible
1:37:17
person. What is it
1:37:19
with you and leaving expensive stuff sitting out
1:37:21
for someone to just grab and run?' "'First
1:37:25
of all, Mr. Know-it-all.
1:37:28
They have to know what it
1:37:31
was they were stealing. Secondly,
1:37:34
I store these
1:37:36
as well as my other
1:37:38
rare items in a large,
1:37:40
secure vault.' "'Really?
1:37:43
Is it inside a bank or hidden behind a
1:37:45
secret wall?' "'Actually,'
1:37:48
Madam Mona confessed with some
1:37:50
embarrassment. "'I keep them
1:37:52
locked in an old freezer in
1:37:55
the back, but it
1:37:57
is locked.' "'Broderick
1:38:00
looked at her with incredulity. Does
1:38:02
the Federal Reserve know about this
1:38:04
cutting-edge technology? Well,
1:38:07
it's a huge padlock.
1:38:10
Madame Ona was eager to get back to the
1:38:12
matter at hand. Here, look
1:38:15
at this, she said, removing
1:38:17
the key from a lanyard around her neck
1:38:19
and using it to unlock the front of
1:38:21
the case. She removed
1:38:24
the small wooden figurine that depicted
1:38:26
the crucifixion. John
1:38:28
the Roman soldier was piercing Jesus' side
1:38:31
with a long spear. John
1:38:34
the disciple, Mary Magdalene, and
1:38:36
Jesus' mother were staring in disbelief,
1:38:38
an expression of palpable despair etched
1:38:41
on their upturned faces. The
1:38:44
center of the figurine displayed an image
1:38:46
of Jesus on the cross. His
1:38:49
look was of intense sorrow and utter
1:38:51
anguish. A
1:38:53
marvelous piece, no? Madame
1:38:56
Ona asked. What
1:38:58
I'd really like is the
1:39:00
wood from the actual cross
1:39:03
of Christ to form a
1:39:05
set with the bloodied crown
1:39:07
and mouth that
1:39:09
would bring together the touch
1:39:11
of authenticity that I wish
1:39:14
to convey. Then
1:39:16
she held the carving up to Broderick's face.
1:39:19
Now then, she said, in
1:39:22
the lowest severe tone, the
1:39:24
image of this figurine
1:39:27
will better ensure your
1:39:29
effectiveness. Focus
1:39:32
on Jesus as he hangs on
1:39:34
the cross. Imprint
1:39:37
the image into your mind
1:39:39
as indelibly as possible. Then
1:39:43
you get there. I
1:39:45
need you at the foot of that
1:39:47
cross, not an
1:39:49
inch further. Don't
1:39:52
get overwhelmed by what you
1:39:54
are witnessing. It
1:39:56
will be difficult, but I
1:39:59
need you to... collect what I asked
1:40:01
of you. Are
1:40:03
you ready to do this?" Yes,
1:40:07
Broderick said with the cocksuredness
1:40:09
that only an arrogant bully
1:40:11
would wield. But remember,
1:40:13
if you screw with me, I'll make
1:40:16
good on that threat. In
1:40:18
fact, if your mom's still living, you might want
1:40:20
to call her. You know, just
1:40:23
in case you both disappear into the
1:40:25
ether. I'll
1:40:27
remember, Mr. O'Connor. I
1:40:30
assure you, it is
1:40:32
at the forefront of my
1:40:34
mind. Madam
1:40:37
O'Mona handed Broderick back the stone. Nothing,
1:40:41
she said. Close
1:40:43
your eyes and hold the talisman
1:40:46
between your hands. Likewise,
1:40:48
you need to be holding
1:40:51
it in your hands to
1:40:53
return here. I'm
1:40:55
sure you know the rest of the
1:40:57
drill. Ready
1:40:59
or not, Broderick said, then
1:41:01
started the process. He
1:41:04
pushed aside everything that was clutter in
1:41:06
his mind and focused his energy on
1:41:08
the wooden figurine. It
1:41:11
wasn't long before he smelled dusty air.
1:41:14
The mix of soldier mockery and grieving
1:41:16
women's wails echoed in his ears. He
1:41:20
kept his eyes closed until he felt ready
1:41:22
to act. From
1:41:25
a distant place in his mind, Broderick
1:41:27
heard Madam O'Mona's airy voice calling out
1:41:29
to him. Keep
1:41:31
your eyes closed a
1:41:33
bit longer, Mr. O'Connor.
1:41:36
You only have one chance
1:41:39
to get this right. Reach
1:41:42
out. Can
1:41:44
you feel the wood? Touch
1:41:47
the wood of the cross and
1:41:49
feel a connection to it. Broderick
1:41:54
took her instructions, reaching until he felt
1:41:56
the hardness of wood. Soon,
1:41:59
a burning and crushing and indescribable
1:42:01
pain blanketed his body. A
1:42:04
sensation of sticky wetness was rolling
1:42:06
down on him. A
1:42:09
profound sadness gripped him, squeezing his
1:42:11
soul. His
1:42:13
confused and horrified mind understood
1:42:16
what was happening. Broderick
1:42:18
snapped his eyes open, expecting to
1:42:20
be looking up at the twisted
1:42:22
body hanging horrifically from the cross.
1:42:26
That was not what he saw. Rather
1:42:29
than looking up, he was
1:42:31
glancing down at a man comforting a
1:42:34
distressed woman. A
1:42:36
younger woman with tears and dirt
1:42:38
smearing her face was also present.
1:42:41
To his left and right, he
1:42:43
saw broken men on crosses. Breathing
1:42:47
had become difficult. Every
1:42:49
time Broderick slumped, his lungs
1:42:51
compressed. Despite
1:42:53
his efforts to straighten up, the
1:42:56
thick nails securing his feet to the
1:42:58
small platform only made him cry out
1:43:00
more. His
1:43:02
torment and terror intensified when he
1:43:04
looked down again and saw a
1:43:06
Roman soldier standing next to his
1:43:08
cross with a long spear, gazing
1:43:11
up at him like a vulture. Oh
1:43:14
god! Broderick
1:43:16
said in a gasping hoarse
1:43:18
voice, saturated with raw fear.
1:43:22
What did you do, woman? What
1:43:26
did you do? I
1:43:29
gotta get back. Broderick
1:43:32
didn't remember stowing the talisman,
1:43:35
dressed only in a bloody ragged
1:43:37
loincloth. He wondered how
1:43:40
he could have secured its safety. Was
1:43:42
it still on him? The
1:43:45
talisman? Where's
1:43:48
the damn talisman? Then
1:43:51
he thought of his hands. It
1:43:53
had to be in the hand. The
1:43:56
excruciating pain in Broderick's gored hands
1:43:59
overwhelmed him. him, preventing
1:44:01
him from feeling anything else. Screaming,
1:44:04
he forced his right hand open to
1:44:06
check if it was clutching the lifesaving
1:44:09
artifact. It wasn't there.
1:44:12
Please, God, let
1:44:14
it be in my other hand, Broderick
1:44:17
begged. He agonizingly
1:44:19
spread some fingers of his left hand
1:44:22
and saw that they were grasping his
1:44:24
ticket from this awful fate. Screw
1:44:27
your wood, you piece of
1:44:29
filth, he snarled through
1:44:31
gritted teeth. If my
1:44:33
hands aren't ripped to shreds when I
1:44:36
get back, I'm gonna
1:44:38
bitch slap you to another
1:44:40
hemisphere. Oh
1:44:42
yeah, and there's that
1:44:45
party with your big sweet mama
1:44:47
to enjoy as well. Broderick's
1:44:51
sense of relief at having the
1:44:53
talisman back soon turned to wide-eyed
1:44:55
delirium. As he remembered
1:44:57
the most fundamental rule of teleportation,
1:45:00
you must hold the stone in both
1:45:02
hands, not one. He
1:45:05
became a wild and helpless animal,
1:45:07
thrashing and howling, his
1:45:10
vain attempts at ripping his right hand
1:45:12
free so he could cover the talisman-proof
1:45:14
feudal. The full
1:45:16
weight of his predicament hit him hard
1:45:18
when he realized he had overlooked yet
1:45:21
another important rule. If
1:45:23
he failed to return within ten minutes,
1:45:25
he'd be trapped in the moment forever.
1:45:29
A world without end, amen,
1:45:31
he remembered. With a
1:45:33
high-pitched well that would have brought
1:45:35
a grand feeling of glee to
1:45:37
the stone's owner, poor Broderick hollered,
1:45:43
but not for the last time. Back
1:45:53
at the store, Madamona stared at
1:45:55
the wooden figurine in her hand.
1:45:58
Broderick's crucified image was
1:46:00
forever etched into it, his
1:46:03
contorted face a rictus of misery
1:46:05
and excretion. A look
1:46:08
of sublime satisfaction spread across her
1:46:10
own face as she began flipping
1:46:12
the figurine from one hand to
1:46:14
the other, just as
1:46:16
Broderick had once done with the talisman.
1:46:19
Yes, Broderick O'Connor,
1:46:23
she beamed, this
1:46:25
piece will add considerable
1:46:27
worth to my collection.
1:46:31
It was carved from a
1:46:33
one-of-a-kind slab of wood from
1:46:36
a specific cross. Whoops!
1:46:40
And to think, I
1:46:42
sent you back there for
1:46:44
nothing. Madamona
1:46:48
carried the piece to the glass
1:46:50
display cabinet, where she kept the
1:46:53
other impressive artifacts. She
1:46:55
was fumbling for the key on her lanyard
1:46:57
when a thought made her stop. I
1:47:01
understand how valuable and rare
1:47:03
you are. I should
1:47:07
place you under lock and
1:47:09
key, she told the man
1:47:11
in the figurine. But
1:47:14
you did say that
1:47:16
I was careless, clumsy,
1:47:18
and irresponsible. You
1:47:21
did say that, right? Now,
1:47:25
let's see. Where's
1:47:28
to put you? Where
1:47:31
to put you? Madamona
1:47:34
pouted in concentration as she
1:47:36
began surveying the sales floor.
1:47:39
Once she settled on an appropriate spot,
1:47:42
she sashayed to it. Walking
1:47:44
down the aisle, she stopped to gaze
1:47:46
at the shelf where she had displayed
1:47:49
the talisman. As was its
1:47:51
habit, it had returned to its home in
1:47:53
the soft black cloth. Welcome,
1:47:56
Beck, she said. As for
1:47:59
you? She said to the
1:48:01
figurine, I think you
1:48:03
go perfectly with some other
1:48:06
items that I've seen some
1:48:08
cunning folks back for. You
1:48:11
should all get along fine.
1:48:15
You have so much in
1:48:17
common. Madam
1:48:19
Ona smiled as she positioned the
1:48:21
figurine alongside some other items on
1:48:23
the shelf. One
1:48:25
of them was a framed 5x9
1:48:28
black and white photo of a
1:48:30
desperate man inches away from the
1:48:32
gigantic dorsal fin of a shark.
1:48:35
The image of a sinking battleship
1:48:37
in the background called the USS
1:48:39
Indianapolis was visible in the distance.
1:48:43
Next to the photo was a
1:48:45
small porcelain vase depicting an elderly
1:48:47
woman writhing in agony within Dante's
1:48:49
Inferno. Unlike the
1:48:51
30th short haired man and the
1:48:54
wooden figurine next to hers, she
1:48:56
too was screaming. Madam
1:48:59
Ona stepped back admiring her
1:49:01
collection. After
1:49:03
a moment she turned and went to her small
1:49:05
cramped office at the rear of the store. A
1:49:10
short time later she heard the ringing
1:49:12
of the small bell over the front
1:49:14
door signaling the arrival of a customer.
1:49:17
A young woman entered the shop and
1:49:20
began perusing the owls. Her
1:49:22
name was Blair and
1:49:24
she had a need. And
1:49:43
that was Madam Ona's shop
1:49:45
of curiosities by P.D. Williams.
1:49:48
A good reminder to use your
1:49:51
enchanted artifacts only as directed. A
1:49:53
little about the author, P.D.
1:49:55
Williams is an uncommonly handsome
1:49:57
author, composer, and multi-useter miniser.
1:50:00
list for North Carolina. He'd
1:50:02
like to remind everyone that his
1:50:04
latest collection of short horror fiction,
1:50:07
Dark House, Many Rooms, is still
1:50:09
available on Amazon and Audible. The
1:50:11
audiobook was narrated by some of
1:50:14
your well-known friends, Jeff
1:50:16
Helpe-Helpert in Sturtivant, Paul
1:50:18
J. Moosefucker McSorley, and yours
1:50:21
truly. True blood. For
1:50:24
fans of his redneck horror comedy
1:50:26
series starring Craig and Lorna Wankumoff,
1:50:28
a bundle of their first three adventures
1:50:30
will be available in late February at
1:50:33
the online stores I just mentioned. The
1:50:35
newest entry in the collection, Craig's Sea
1:50:37
Terror, will be released at the same
1:50:39
time as a novella. If
1:50:42
you'd like a book discount code for any
1:50:44
of his works or just to say howdy,
1:50:46
you can reach P.D.
1:50:49
at pdwilliamshorrorwriter at facebook.com
1:50:51
and on his website,
1:50:54
pdwilliamsauthor.com. Thanks
1:50:56
P.D. And do
1:50:58
old Drew Blood a favor, would you? Subscribe
1:51:00
to his podcast wherever you do your listening
1:51:02
and leave him a five-star review and a
1:51:05
kind word, even if you're listening on YouTube.
1:51:07
He needs soldiers on all fronts to win
1:51:10
this battle, and he appreciates it. To
1:51:12
hear a premium ad-free edition of
1:51:14
the Knights and all the other
1:51:16
episodes, visit simpliscarypodcast.com today and click
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find yourself at Chillin' Tales for
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Oh, and you can find True Blood
1:51:56
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1:52:00
Dark Tales Podcast is accepting submissions
1:52:02
friend. If you've got a story
1:52:04
or two you'd like to be
1:52:06
featured on the show, send it
1:52:08
to drewbloodhorror@gmail.com. If selected,
1:52:10
you'll get the full treatment, 10
1:52:12
bananas. Well,
1:52:22
I'm afraid this is where we part ways,
1:52:25
at least till next week. So
1:52:28
grab a drink for the road, friend. You
1:52:30
too, Billy, I know you're listening.
1:52:32
Let's finish this. A
1:52:35
big shout out to all the listeners and
1:52:37
all my friends out there, all the sweet
1:52:39
patrons, and I'd just like to say I
1:52:42
hope everyone has a wonderful week. So
1:52:45
may the wind be at your back, and may
1:52:47
the road rise up to meet you. And
1:52:50
until next week, Billy, I've got my
1:52:53
leotard ready at a moment's notice, and
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