0:00

And we're all in different places with relationships. Like,

0:02

I obviously, you know, not really doing much in

0:04

that department. And Scott was going through a breakup.

0:06

So we're all like really chill out. Just don't

0:08

you want to talk about it? I was trying

0:10

to figure a way to transition the bus like

0:13

that. No, we didn't break up. Well, we did

0:15

break up. I was like, brother, we did break

0:17

up. There was nothing more sad. Well, first off,

0:19

OK, there are several things. So me and Courtney

0:21

just that we we. God,

0:24

we should be done with this podcast. Come on, man.

0:27

I'm sure they were going. OK, hold on. No, no,

0:29

no, no. To the sit on the car. I got

0:31

things to talk about. Can I take my shoes off?

0:34

Is it a shoes off? It's a shoes off podcast.

0:38

No, I'm just trying to take your shoes

0:40

off. You get your stinky feet. Yeah, you

0:42

got the bunion ass feet. For you talking

0:44

about that 50 year old woman looking bunion

0:47

feet. I don't have bunion. Oh, yes. Crippling

0:49

your side. Because you just said I'd sell

0:51

you like you call me a

0:53

fat fuck. After first of all, no,

0:55

I didn't. Yes, you did. You said

0:57

you were got you said you got

0:59

fat, fat, fatty face fat and no

1:02

lips. And you said I'm ugly. You

1:04

wish. And all I said was you got a

1:06

lot of cellulose. No, listen, I see. I

1:09

feel like a middle aged woman. You know, like a

1:11

middle aged woman cellulite is the

1:13

worst thing that could ever happen to

1:15

you. He was thinking of a terrible,

1:17

yeah, modern day Hiroshima cellulite on women.

1:20

Well, not all like middle aged women. Like they

1:22

always say stuff about it. Anyway, I'm

1:24

sitting here thinking I could think

1:27

I could even a safe space. I could show a

1:29

little leg to my friends. And instead he's like, oh,

1:32

look, old dimple thighs. That's what he

1:34

called me. I'm rich, bitch. What is

1:36

that? It says zero dollars. What? What?

1:39

I was down to my last 20 bucks. Take the toothpick out of

1:41

your like, I was down to my last 20, my last 20 and

1:45

a hit big. Let me see. Oh,

1:47

135. I

1:50

would you like. I feel the feeling you said you

1:53

went down 20 bucks and you really went down 200

1:55

and you lost money. No, I swear to God. Are

1:57

you? What did you play? I played. Like

10:00

like certain certain things you can just know where

10:03

they were invented You know

10:05

this is an Eastern Europe thing like like

10:07

college football. That's us. We did

10:09

that you're welcome America sick NBA

10:12

basketball we did that we did

10:14

that basket power slap or well

10:16

people slapping each other Romania

10:19

has to be where they're just bored as hell where

10:21

it's cold It's cold and there's nothing

10:23

better to do and just slap the shit out

10:25

of each other Women there like if I was

10:28

to go up and slap if we were gonna

10:30

slap off me and any of the women there

10:32

They would knock me out for slap. They would

10:34

take off our heads with one and then the

10:37

410 pound guy was named the

10:39

crazy Hawaiian the crazy Hawaiian There

10:41

is the crazy Hawaiian and the

10:43

Hawaiian hitman terrifying there who let

10:45

these people have other people for

10:47

cash behemoth Just think about this

10:50

before this sport was popular

10:52

here in the States. Those two were probably

10:54

still slap Slapping each other the

10:56

two Hawaiians they would just meet up and slap

10:59

I just want to know how you like

11:01

like the like the UFC I get because

11:03

it's like it's fighting It's martial arts, you

11:05

know, there's like there's technique to it Well,

11:07

I'm not saying that there's not technique to

11:10

slapping, but it's kind of like a dance,

11:12

you know Like you're dancing with your opponent

11:14

This is just brutal like you're just slapping

11:16

the shit out of each other and like

11:18

I want to know who's signing up for

11:20

this Honestly with all that said can't get

11:23

enough. Oh Love there's

11:25

no come every time they ask. Oh,

11:27

okay Yeah, that's how

11:29

we're going a random place dude Nothing.

11:31

I love better the power because you're just

11:33

hanging out everybody's there We're swapping war stories

11:35

and then it's like alright guys three two

11:37

and everybody turns around They see a guy

11:40

gets slapped and knocked out and everybody like

11:42

oh Whoa, and then

11:44

we go back to just hanging out. Yeah, that's also

11:46

that's a good part of that's American living It's not

11:48

like going to a UFC event where you have to

11:50

like watch everything for 20 You're locked in for five

11:52

minutes straight 25 minutes. I belong the fight last This

11:55

is like they slap each other every two

11:57

minutes. Maybe so like yeah, you're just like

11:59

you just You have to get to do

12:01

whatever you want, and then slapping is happening

12:03

in the background. It's pretty sick. I think

12:05

in between each slap, they have like a

12:07

minute of recovery. And so it's the

12:10

perfect social event, because yeah, you just slap,

12:12

knock out. Or if they don't

12:14

get knocked out, like if it's

12:16

a shitty slap, then the crowd's

12:18

cheering. They're like, oh, they ate

12:20

that. What's the largest

12:23

animal that you think you could

12:25

power slap to knock out? To

12:27

knock out? One slap knock

12:30

out. I don't even think I could knock out a

12:32

handsome. A cat. Maybe a cat. If the cat's sitting

12:34

there and lets me get a clean look at it.

12:36

Oh, they're gonna let you get a... Yeah, yeah, a

12:38

cat. I was thinking a crow for whatever reason. No,

12:40

crows are strong. Do they fly? They fly with rain

12:42

hitting their heads. Yeah, but their bones... They gotta be

12:45

strong up there. No, their bones are fragile. What are

12:47

you talking about? They got flying in a rainstorm. That's

12:49

so different than my five fingers coming at you fast.

12:51

Have you ever driven in a car and put your

12:53

hand out the window? It doesn't feel like being slapped

12:55

up in the face of a rainstorm. I

12:58

would much rather do that than getting slapped.

13:00

Speaking of crows, did he tell you what

13:02

his summer fling is? Your summer

13:05

fling? He's trying to domesticate a crow. Yeah, well,

13:07

I wanna come up with a bet or something,

13:11

but I do think I can't, because there's been

13:14

a lot of crows outside of the house lately.

13:16

Yeah, it's terrifying. And I think, and then in

13:18

conjunction with that, I saw a video of a

13:21

crow that has been domesticated. I

13:24

think I can wrangle one in. Do you even know

13:26

the first thing about domesticating a crow? I think you

13:28

just have to lure them in with food, and

13:31

then from there, it's kind of a free-for-all. What kind

13:33

of food do you feed a crow? Cheeseburger. Big

13:36

Matt. Double

13:39

patty. He doesn't even know how to

13:41

eat it. He's like, what the hell is this? Well, here's

13:43

what you have to do. There's a crow

13:46

feeder I'm gonna get and put in the back of my heart. You

13:48

don't have crow feeders. A crow feeder? And once

13:50

you feed them the first time, then

13:52

you can build puzzles into them and

13:55

get the food so they have to figure out. I

13:57

gotta move this, gotta move that. And then, by

13:59

the end of the... By the end of the summer, I wanted it to be

14:01

able to land on my finger. On your face.

14:04

But what do you do with them after that? Yeah, then

14:06

you just have a crow that like... Oh, technically, you're not

14:08

in California, you're not legally

14:10

allowed to domesticate a crow. So

14:13

I will have to... I'm not gonna frame it as... I'm

14:15

gonna teach him a trick and then I'm gonna turn him

14:17

back loose. And he's just gonna be like... He

14:20

gets...meets back with the other crows. He's like, I had a

14:22

wild summer. So

14:25

I got put in this internment camp. I

14:28

mean, you fed me well and I can do a backflip now, but

14:30

I guess I'm free. Yeah, that

14:33

crow...I don't know if he'll be able to

14:35

assimilate back into the crow culture. Yeah, you're

14:37

probably gonna fuck up this crow. Especially because

14:39

he's gonna think he's better than everyone else.

14:41

Circus crow! Get out of here, circus crow!

14:43

Oh my gosh. Yeah. Do

14:45

crows eat meat? Are you worried about...

14:47

I think they're omnivores. What if you

14:49

start mad crow disease? That is

14:51

something we have to take into account. I'll do

14:53

my due diligence. I'll watch The Birds before. I'll

14:56

just watch any movie that has... Like the Alfred

14:58

Hitchcock movie? Speaking of animals, we'd already talked about

15:00

this earlier, but I still can't get off the

15:03

topic. There is...and I'm pretty

15:05

beat up about it actually. There's

15:08

a guy named Joey. He's a bear, a

15:10

grizzly bear. They call

15:12

him the unlucky bear because he's

15:14

just shown in the forest. He's albino, so he's all

15:16

white, but he's actually a grizzly bear. And

15:19

an animal conservationist came in, saw

15:21

him, mistaked him for a polar

15:23

bear, tranquilized him. And

15:25

sent him to the North Pole. Did they

15:28

see the footage of how they sent him

15:30

to the North Pole? It's just like he's

15:32

attached to a helicopter. And they just lay

15:34

him...imagine you're just going for some berries or

15:36

whatever they're doing. Trying to eat a

15:38

piece of salmon. Going to hang out at a top near some

15:40

pine cones. And then

15:43

you just wake up in like... A frozen

15:45

tundra. Like, what the hell? And

15:48

then I guess I don't know who watched

15:50

over them or who figured it out, but

15:52

someone figured it out because he just wasn't

15:54

doing well. He just wasn't. Well, it was

15:57

the...he's a lot smaller. Like polar bears are

15:59

fucking massive. a lot smaller than all the

16:01

other polar bears, and they know he's not

16:03

one of them. And so they're like, they're

16:05

bullying him. They're like. The polar bears did

16:08

not welcome him. They're beating him up,

16:10

they're stealing his food. Apparently humans saw

16:12

that he wasn't doing well, and

16:16

they also kind of looked a little harder. They're

16:18

like, this guy's a grizzly bear. You gotta take

16:20

him back. This guy doesn't look anything like a

16:22

polar bear. See, they take him all the way

16:24

back to the forest, and then like a couple

16:26

weeks later, maybe a couple months later, he's

16:28

just chilling in the forest, gets tranquilized again.

16:31

So he just knocks out

16:33

a completely different animal, whatever

16:36

they're called. Conservationist. Conservationist. They

16:39

take him back to the North Pole. This

16:41

is some sick trick. He thinks I'm practical jokers. Where does

16:44

it take, is this in like Alaska or something? That's what

16:46

I was trying to figure out. I

16:48

didn't know where they were

16:50

finding Joey, because in what

16:53

world. As of the Alaska. Yeah, like

16:55

what world do you see an albino

16:57

grizzly bear in the forest, and you go.

16:59

It feels like something Mike Tyson would buy, couldn't

17:01

handle it and just lets loose. He always had

17:03

white tigers. True, true. He loves

17:05

white stuff. Ally. I

17:08

know, but he, yeah, so he gets

17:10

into Antarctica again, and

17:12

then figure out, another person figures

17:14

out he's a grizzly bear. So

17:16

they're spending a lot of money on oil

17:18

and transportation and gasoline and helicopters and manpower

17:20

to get this guy to relocate.

17:23

So they send him back to the forest. And

17:26

he's like, okay, that's probably the last time I'm

17:29

ever gonna get tranquilized and sent to an

17:31

icy wonderland. Actually, icy

17:33

hell. And for the third time,

17:35

the unlucky Joey bear is tranked.

17:38

And you know he's knocking out like, oh

17:40

God, no. He's like, oh Jesus Christ. No

17:43

fucking way. But this time he wakes up

17:45

in a zoo, surrounded by polar bears. He's

17:49

like, now they wanna observe me? So

17:52

I don't know where he's at now. I think they put

17:54

him back in the forest, but he could be anywhere at

17:56

this point. I hope they give him a vacation. Oh my

17:58

God. This kinda reminds me of every. to like unlucky

18:00

animals. Have I told you about Bobo

18:03

the Chimp? Bobo the Chimp? Yeah. He,

18:05

his, was your grandma? Yeah, it's like

18:08

my great grandma. You don't know this.

18:10

My great grandma, or great, great, I

18:13

don't know. It was a long time ago. They

18:15

had a pet chimp named Bobo. What? Yeah, it

18:17

was pretty sick. Things happened in the south. I

18:19

mean, I never got to see it because it

18:21

was well before I was alive. But they had-

18:23

How the hell did they get a pet chimp?

18:25

No, dude, it was the south and it was

18:28

like 50 years ago. Don't say it's the south.

18:30

Like chimps are just roaming around. Yeah, you can

18:32

get anything down there. There aren't a lot of

18:34

regulations. I think it's like three pints of moonshine.

18:36

You get yourself a chimp. Yeah, that's the conversion

18:38

rate. And so Bobo, the family had went on

18:40

vacation and Bobo, they had like kept it a

18:42

cage while they were gone. And he normally, I

18:44

think, would be out and about. So when they

18:46

got back, they tried the, the dad tried to

18:49

feed Bobo and he thought he

18:51

was getting put back into the cage. He like bit,

18:53

bit the dad and ran up

18:56

into a tree. And so they had to call

18:58

the cops to try or someone called the cops

19:00

because there's a chimp up in the tree. So

19:02

the cops were, the cops came and they're like,

19:04

hey, we got to get Bobo down. He

19:07

bit you and that's not cool. The

19:11

dad was like, Bobo, come down, come down. Bobo was up

19:13

there crying because he had hurt or

19:15

he knew he had fucked up. He crawls down

19:18

and the police shoot him on site.

19:21

The police shoot him on site. Bobo,

19:24

not Bo. No questions asked. But

19:26

he felt bad. He had

19:28

remorse. Yeah, but you know, I've had several women,

19:31

you know, I've had several women bite me in

19:33

certain instances. It's terrible. It is terrible. It's very

19:35

sad. I've never put a bullet in their brain.

19:37

God. I was thinking we treat humans in such

19:39

a different way. Times were different back then. Times

19:42

were different. 70

19:45

years ago, 60 years, a long time ago. It is crazy

19:47

how we just, how we just

19:49

shoot animals because I think it was,

19:51

uh, it was the recently, it was

19:53

the anniversary of Harambe getting

19:56

shot. Like there's no, there's no, I

19:58

feel like tranq, like they tranq Joey. six

20:00

different times. But they won't drink

20:02

bobo. No, Joey, it was a

20:04

situation where he was identifying,

20:07

he was kind of appropriating a certain culture

20:10

if we're being completely honest, and he deserved everything that

20:12

he had coming to him. Amen. Like,

20:14

Joey can't be out here just, like, you know

20:16

what I mean? Michael Jackson and these bears. You're

20:20

not gonna perform? Oh, do you guys know?

20:22

Okay, so I saw, it was like a,

20:25

maybe it was a notification from Twitter, or

20:27

maybe it was like a news article or

20:29

something, but basically it was saying it was

20:31

like Twitter, like, you know

20:33

how your likes and stuff used to be

20:35

public? Now they're private.

20:38

Like, no one else

20:40

can see, like, what you've liked. And

20:43

that reminded me, when I was in

20:45

high school, one of our

20:47

football coaches had a Twitter, and

20:50

I don't think he knew that- Yeah,

20:52

he's definitely liking porn, right? His entire

20:54

account, he only followed porn stars, and

20:57

he only liked porn accounts. It

21:00

was some of the sickest shit that you've ever

21:02

seen. Like, he was into- Who ended up having

21:04

a conversation with him? I, honest to God, I

21:06

don't think anyone did. Yeah, how do you pick

21:08

it up? Yeah, because that's just like, A,

21:11

probably getting fired. And he was a good coach. I

21:13

don't think he should be fired, honestly. He's given, like,

21:15

references. Yeah, he's just teaching you how to be a

21:17

man. We did talk about it in health

21:20

class, and sort of just dialing

21:23

porn back into what reality actually is.

21:25

So it ended up being informational. A

21:28

lesson, I hope that happens to Joey.

21:31

I do. So far, he's the only one that's had a lesson, and he doesn't

21:33

know what it is. Wait,

21:35

have you told him about your girlfriend

21:38

in the car with your mom? Oh,

21:41

no. I actually have two funny stories. One of them,

21:43

I don't know if we've talked about, have I told

21:45

the Sinespia story yet? It was. So

21:47

we were at Sinespia or Sinespia,

21:49

I don't know how you say it. It's

21:51

in, like, West Hollywood somewhere, but

21:53

it's at this big funeral, not

21:56

funeral, big, what are those place, cemeteries.

22:00

Every week in the summer they show a movie, and

22:02

so people will just go sit, watch a movie. It's

22:04

like a drive-in, but you get to go sit. Is it weird to

22:06

you though? To be surrounded by the

22:08

dead while you're watching a flick? Yeah, I don't

22:11

know who allows it. If it's in that part

22:13

of town, it's probably in the Hollywood Forever cemetery,

22:15

which is gorgeous. I mean, it

22:17

is a little weird, don't get me wrong.

22:19

Now, you're not directly around bodies, there's a

22:22

big clearing there. I've been there, and they're

22:24

decently close. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like

22:26

if zombies happened, you're not getting out. In

22:28

the smoking sections right by it, you can

22:30

put some ashes on some. Well that's just

22:32

aschis on ashes. But so we were

22:34

sitting there, and I was fucking around,

22:36

and I had taken a sip of water, and I kind of spit it at her, just

22:39

to get her wet. Just

22:42

not like that, but just fucking around. And

22:44

so she was gonna do it back to

22:47

me, and I was like, don't, because

22:49

you're gonna miss, and you're gonna hit the people that are behind

22:51

us. And she was like, no, no, no, no, no, she didn't

22:53

say anything. She got a huge gulp of water. And

22:55

so let's say you're me, okay? She

22:59

was like this. And

23:03

looked at just some random person that was sitting

23:05

to my left, and

23:07

spit water all over them. And I was like,

23:10

why the fuck did you not look at

23:12

me? And she was like, well

23:14

I used to have a gap in between my teeth, and

23:16

I forgot that my retainer closed it. I

23:20

used to be able to aim. She thought she was a sidespitter. Yeah.

23:23

Yeah, I mean when you're conditioned for

23:25

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only subject to approval. gives

28:00

the weight to the situation. And so I was

28:02

just like, what in the, after, what are you

28:04

talking about? The word pussy, like you can't say

28:06

like eat out. Sandra Bullock wasn't it? What are

28:08

you talking about? Who was in the movie Gravity?

28:11

Sandra Bullock. Sandra Bullock. Ah, you know when you

28:13

reference wrong and then you gotta sit with it?

28:15

So then we had, we just sat there in

28:17

silence and Courtney was like, I'm sorry, Ms. Stephan.

28:20

Oh no. I was like, you could

28:22

have said anything. Yeah. You

28:25

could have just. The silence really killed us. Just kept it

28:27

going. What'd your mom say? Your mom. That's

28:29

okay. I understand that my son likes

28:32

to perform more. Is that what we learned? My mom was like,

28:35

I'm just happy he likes a girl. Whoa.

28:38

A little homophobic. I know. Take it

28:40

up with her. She's gonna watch this and like, I'm not homophobic.

28:42

Yeah, she didn't say that either. We can paint her in any

28:44

light we actually want. I know. That's the

28:46

great thing about podcasts. We can say anything and paint.

28:48

Who should we paint in a negative light? I used

28:50

to, when I used to do that all the time

28:52

with my mom, when I was a kid, we would

28:54

go places. Like I remember one time specifically, we went

28:56

to the chiropractor and my mom was getting her back

28:58

worked on. And the chiropractor was like, you

29:00

want me to work on yours really fast too? Cause I was like, let

29:02

me work on mine, work on mine. And so he

29:05

like lifted up my shirt to look at something and

29:07

I had like a score and he was like, what

29:09

is this? I was like, my mom put out cigarettes

29:11

on me. Oh my God. Skylar.

29:14

Skylar. I didn't do that.

29:16

I was like, of course she would say that. Since

29:18

I'm from Vegas, I did

29:20

tell the greater part of our county that my

29:22

mom stripped for money. And

29:24

then we had to come out there because

29:28

the pimp needed money and she didn't have it.

29:30

She spent it on a rent. So she had

29:32

a couple people, she had to explain some things

29:34

too. And honestly she got

29:36

some respect from others. So I don't regret it.

29:38

What the hell is your guys' problems? Like why

29:40

would you do that? When you're 10 years old

29:43

and you have an imagination like me, people

29:46

get in trouble around you. And

29:48

you're gonna apply, like right now, so remorseful.

29:50

Yeah, okay. But my frontal lobe

29:52

wasn't there to tell me good or bad.

29:55

My imagination, I was making

29:57

a new Star Wars movie with my

30:00

little action. figures. Your imagination. You know

30:02

what I mean? Okay. Well, yeah, but

30:04

I just want to sit.

30:06

No, if we're gonna get the full scope of a story,

30:09

you had no friends and you were alone. I didn't

30:11

say I had no friends. I just happened to be

30:13

alone at that point. Okay. And your

30:15

imagination was telling people that

30:17

your mom was a stripper. What? So many friends.

30:20

So many people to tell. So many. Oh, the

30:22

stories I could tell. Like once

30:24

you built that thing, you're like, I can't wait to show myself.

30:27

You just went to the mirror and you're like, hey,

30:29

reflecting Jared, what do you think? You and Alyssa would

30:32

have been good friends. Y'all needed each

30:34

other probably 10, 15 years ago. Honestly,

30:36

yeah, probably. I was, I was where

30:39

Alyssa is right now when I was

30:41

in high, like when I was middle

30:43

school. Alyssa, I wanted you to know

30:46

I wasn't in any of

30:48

this. No, we just need to be there for her.

30:50

You know, I finally found friends

30:52

that were there for me and pulled me out of

30:54

it. Do you want me to list them? No, I

30:57

thought you were talking about us. Oh, no, no. I

30:59

want to pull you out of it. No, you guys,

31:01

every day you wake up and you're like, how can

31:03

I put them back there? Don't show us. Like don't

31:05

boast. What are the odds you go down and you

31:08

just like you put all of that on my red

31:10

or black? I bet black

31:12

four times in a row yesterday, it never

31:14

hit once. I think it's due on,

31:16

I can't wait for us to get back on Sunday.

31:19

Los Angeles. Yeah. To Los Angeles. Number one, because I

31:21

can't wait to see Trevor, our buddy Trevor's coming out.

31:23

So excited. We're going to have the best little week

31:25

of our lives. Number two, we

31:28

got that fucking guy to come take that

31:30

box that's upstairs. It's taking up the whole

31:32

upstairs on Monday. He's getting rid of it.

31:34

Talk about Alyssa. No, you jackass. Do not

31:37

call her that box. She's a woman. The

31:39

dude's cardboard box is up there. Stop covering

31:41

my camera. Show a few hours. That's how

31:43

much your TV covers up the house. It's

31:46

actually insane. You bought the biggest TV possible.

31:48

No, I get, I

31:51

like a cinematic experience. You

31:53

don't fucking AMC in your bedroom.

31:55

What are you talking about? I

31:57

get one TV and everybody's up in arms. No,

31:59

it's pretty sick. completely

44:01

changed everybody on Patreon and

44:03

steal their money. Well,

44:05

we have their emails, we can cross-reference, go to

44:07

their houses, steal TVs, sell them. I don't want

44:09

to get into all that. There was like $5,000

44:12

stakes that was purchased just in the time that we

44:15

ate for like an hour. But the

44:17

guy was also telling us that the stake

44:19

was from a cow. The

44:22

cows are born in Japan, raised in

44:24

Australia, and then shipped over here. Which

44:30

is, what are we doing that we're going

44:32

to this great lengths with cows? If you

44:34

look at a ribeye from a store, there

44:36

is fat in it, but it's just like

44:38

typical, like big piece of fat here and

44:40

there. On those, the fat

44:42

just runs throughout. It marbles throughout the

44:44

whole steak. I know we don't have

44:46

the women here, so we're probably not going to have

44:48

the best references for this next part of the podcast.

44:51

But again, if you're part of the Patreon, you get

44:53

to determine sometimes

44:56

what's in the podcast. One

44:58

of those things is dropouts advice. So

45:02

I got a couple. I'm going to read off what

45:04

our listeners need help with. Oh, do you want my

45:06

help? Well, I don't want it, but you're here. And

45:08

we collect- Oh, fuck it. Hey, smooth

45:10

move, X-lex. Did you call me egg-slex? X-lex.

45:14

That's the name of the fucking poop medicine, right?

45:16

Okay, here's one. Hey, so back in 2022, I

45:18

met a guy on a dating app, and three

45:20

months later, we started dating. Fast forward 11 months

45:23

later, and we're at my family's for

45:25

Christmas. I decided to go through his

45:27

phone as a joke and found out that six months

45:29

into the relationship, he'd been cheating

45:31

with multiple women. I had always trusted him

45:33

until then. I gave him another chance, and

45:35

since then, he has done things to prove

45:37

he's sorry, but I still don't know if

45:40

he's worth trusting. Help.

45:42

So, I can't- That is-

45:44

I mean, I assume, so six months in,

45:46

she knew he was cheating, and then apparently he

45:49

stopped at some point? No, 11 months in,

45:51

she knew that he was cheating at six

45:53

months. No, I know, but- Oh. So,

45:55

he just got like, maybe he only did it for a month?

45:57

Not that that's- Yeah, she had to do a lot of digging.

54:00

You know what I mean? Yeah. You got to. Steer

54:03

wide. I just feel like a

54:06

mom and daughter shouldn't

54:08

be Eskimo sisters with each other.

54:10

You know? I feel like

54:12

we're speaking about this too intellectually when

54:15

it's like, yeah, weird, don't do it.

54:17

Yeah, just don't. Some advice is just,

54:19

hey, hey, don't bang the

54:22

woman who wants to bang you's daughter,

54:24

because she wants you. Because that's getting

54:26

borderline psychotic. That's. And really

54:28

hot. Desperate. And we're all in different

54:31

places with relationships. Like, you

54:33

know, Jared's having sex with me. I like Jared.

54:35

Do I even know who he is? Jared's having

54:37

sex with anything that moves. I

54:39

obviously, you know, not really doing much in that department

54:41

and Scott is going through a breakup. So we're all

54:43

like really. Well, chill out. Hold on, I'm not fucking.

54:46

You said you want to talk about it. I was

54:48

trying to figure a way to treat a bus like

54:50

that. No, we didn't break up. Well, we did break

54:52

up. I was like, brother. We did

54:54

break up. There was nothing more sad. Well, first

54:57

off. Okay, there are several things. Me and Courtney,

54:59

just we broke

55:01

up. This was a few weeks ago now,

55:03

several weeks ago now at this point. And

55:06

then we have since then. You've

55:08

reconvened. We've reconvened. We're working it out. We're

55:10

in the shot. The

55:13

fuck out of it. Robbie, I'm talking about sad shit here.

55:17

We are, we are working things out, but

55:20

we did break up and a couple

55:22

of things happened actually that we have to talk about.

55:24

So it was actually the weekend of the spitting

55:27

on the girl. It was the

55:29

next day. And we've been doing

55:31

this thing where, or

55:34

Zach had been doing this thing where he

55:36

had been buying Courtney presents from like

55:38

small little knickknacks. It's fucking weird, dude.

55:40

So if people don't know Zach had

55:42

bought Courtney like an engraved knife. She

55:44

said Courtney, it's pretty funny. And then

55:46

he bought her this Celtic shirt was

55:48

expensive. That was a little weird, but

55:50

whatever. And then I

55:53

bought her a sea turtle. Yeah, but so when we

55:55

were in, we went. Anytime I go to a new

55:57

place, I get his girlfriend a gift. I think it

55:59

was pretty funny. Wait, have you gotten her a knick-knack

56:01

from here? Yeah, that's where the knife was from. Oh,

56:04

from Vegas? When I was in Vegas last time. So

56:06

the day we broke up, we'd

56:08

get back. She ends up staying at the house that night

56:10

because it was a very mutual breakup. It wasn't

56:13

like we were fighting. We just had some things that, you

56:15

know, we just experienced

56:17

love different ways. We need different things out of relationships.

56:19

So we're trying to see if we can make that

56:21

work with us. But

56:25

love her so much. I think she's one of the funniest, coolest people in

56:27

the world. So the

56:29

day that we broke up, we get back to

56:31

the house. Zach is like coming up the stairs

56:33

the same time as we

56:35

enter the house. And I'm like, hey, what's up,

56:37

buddy? And I try to like be short and

56:40

don't really say much. I don't know what's going on. Yeah. I

56:42

thought they were trying to take your, like, pool day. They're

56:44

both in bathing suits. I didn't know what the hell was going on

56:46

in bathing suits. All I know was

56:48

in a bathing suit. Courtney was in a sheer

56:51

thing. I could see through things. And

56:53

I wasn't trying to look. Why were you looking? Yeah, why were you

56:55

looking? I wasn't. She was. If I'm walking up the stairs and she's

56:57

in front of me, and I like, anyway,

56:59

the point is I had a sea turtle. I wanted to

57:01

give her. We get to the room. And we're like, finally,

57:03

we can just, you know, because we tried going to the

57:05

flea market. We had been like crying at the flea market.

57:08

It was nuts. So you go back to the

57:10

house. I'm like, OK, finally, we're not around people. We can, you know,

57:12

just experience our emotions and just kind of go through all of it.

57:15

And then I hear like a knock at the door.

57:17

And I'm like, what the fuck is this? And it

57:19

was Zach. No, you said come in. I was like,

57:21

come in. You could have been like, hey, not now.

57:23

Zach comes in and is like, I got you presents.

57:26

And Cory's like, so I sit there. Don't know that they're

57:28

going through this thing. Cory's like, we just broke up. And

57:31

Zach was like, after I gave her the presents, she's like,

57:33

this is so nice. This is so cool. Oh,

57:35

look at this. And then afterwards, I'm like, oh, great, great, great.

57:37

And then she goes, yeah, we just we

57:39

did just break up, though. So I'm like, why let me in

57:42

the room? Oh, I'm going to

57:44

lie out. That same weekend, the next day,

57:46

Jared had been gone all weekend, living his

57:48

life to the fullest, loving, making memories. And

57:51

he comes into the house. And I was like, how was your weekend,

57:53

buddy? He's like, oh, it was the best weekend of my life. I

57:55

had the most fun. It really was. He was like, how was your

57:57

weekend? I was like, well, me and my girlfriend broke up. So fuck

57:59

off, dude. Leave me alone. And

58:02

nothing was more sad than I got

58:04

back from the workout early. This guy

58:06

that was still at the office. And

58:08

I go by his room and his door's never open. His

58:11

door's open. His bed's never made. My

58:14

bed is always made. I make it every day. No,

58:16

he doesn't. Yes, I do. It's made most days. I

58:18

won't say every day. Is this the part that we're

58:20

really sticking to? I just want to stick to it.

58:22

Sorry. Okay. It's never usually made. So I go by

58:24

and it's made. And I

58:26

just see a piece of paper. She's

58:29

just illuminating from the room. Oh,

58:31

no. Yeah, she left me a letter. There's

58:34

nothing more devastating. Oh, I've walked in on a

58:36

letter before. And you're just like, yeah,

58:39

this one's going to hurt. Yeah, it

58:41

sucked to read. How long

58:43

was it? It was like front and back. It wasn't,

58:45

it didn't suck to. It was very nice.

58:48

She was saying very lovely things, but it was just like...

58:50

It still can be painful. And

58:54

then, so that happened. And then that night... Our

58:56

break is God's o's empic. That night, yeah, and

58:58

I thought it was a funny tweet. And it

59:00

didn't do as well as I thought it would.

59:02

That night after we broke up, that Monday, me

59:04

and Zach went and played tennis or

59:06

pickleball. And one

59:08

of the guys that we were playing with, Zach was like,

59:10

he's like, oh, how y'all been or whatever. Just

59:14

airing out your business? Yeah, we were just talking about

59:16

it. It wasn't a big deal. And then Zach was

59:18

like, she did leave him a note on his bed

59:20

that was pretty sad that it kind of beat

59:23

him up. And this guy that we were hanging

59:25

out with listens only like half the time. And

59:27

he took that as she broke up with me

59:29

through a letter. And so

59:31

he immediately called his girlfriend and was like, I'm

59:33

playing pickleball with a guy, just got dumped via

59:35

letter. Bye. Dude, that's not

59:38

the story at all. Let's do it. He's

59:40

like, all right, who's serving? Like, all right.

59:42

Thank you guys for coming to the Vegas

59:44

episode. Don't we just end it on that?

59:47

Yeah. We're ending it on a heartbreak, just like his

59:49

relationship. No, no, we're good. But now they're back. I

59:51

feel like you got to talk about where you're at

59:53

now. We can't just leave it there. Get

59:56

your on in the description. You just keep talking about it while

59:58

I'm like. are,

1:00:01

uh, we're back together ish. We're working it out.

1:00:04

It's been great. I think, I think it's a

1:00:06

good lesson for communication and relationships. Yeah. That was

1:00:08

the biggest thing. Big things you have to communicate.

1:00:10

There were some things that were part of the

1:00:12

reason why we broke up. That if we would,

1:00:15

if I would have expressed

1:00:17

my, if we would

1:00:19

have just talked about it, some of the stuff

1:00:21

was just, we could have fixed easily, but some

1:00:23

of the stuff, you know, we're fixing over time.

1:00:25

She's the best. Yeah. I think, you know, every

1:00:28

relationship has negotiables and non-negotiables. And, uh, yeah,

1:00:30

you just had to work it out.

1:00:32

So I figure out what those are.

1:00:35

Like my, my non-negotiable or my, I

1:00:37

was going to make a joke. Yeah. Bye guys.

1:00:40

Bye.