0:00

Well, good evening, everybody. It

0:03

is, oh my gosh, the 7th

0:05

of June. Boy, that's a

0:07

birthday of somebody I used to know. 7th

0:09

of June, 2024, and

0:12

we're doing a

0:14

slightly different Friday night live. We're doing a

0:16

chitty chat, and

0:18

we can voice it rather than just me reading

0:21

stuff, which is, I think, nice and a different approach.

0:23

We're going to give that a little bit of a

0:25

try. I certainly

0:28

have my topics in a

0:30

half, but let

0:32

us talk to you,

0:34

the fine listeners, and just

0:36

a tiny tech reminder, if you're not talking, if

0:39

you could be muted, that would be excellent. And

0:42

I guess

0:44

just get your topics ready, but the

0:47

Babylon B is pretty funny. And we've had

0:49

a running gag in my marriage

0:52

for, I don't know, 21 years, that

0:55

every time my wife touches my arm, I have

0:57

to flex. I don't know why that

0:59

is a rule. It just is a rule. And

1:01

anyway, so I just saw today and I showed

1:03

my wife with the crowing excitement that

1:05

I'm not alone. The Babylon B had a

1:07

title, in major gaffe, husband

1:09

forgets to flex when wife touches

1:11

arm. And it kind of goes

1:13

on and on, and it's very funny. And yeah,

1:15

I like one of the things about comedy is

1:19

that it just reminds you that you

1:22

may not be particularly alone in your

1:24

own little particular quirks. And I

1:26

just thought that was funny enough to

1:28

make an actual article. And I thought it was just an

1:30

inside joke in my marriage. But

1:32

she's like, you don't need to do that. I'm like, yeah,

1:34

well, you know, you don't need to dye your hair away

1:36

makeup, but we all have our things, man. We

1:39

all have our things. All right. So

1:41

I'm happy to have questions, conversations. If you

1:43

have anything, you can, of course, type it

1:45

in the chat. And

1:49

if you have something you can just

1:51

unmute and peck away at my brain

1:53

and we'll see what good stuff we can come up

1:55

with. And I'm sure it will be massive

1:58

amounts of excellent, fine stuff. There

2:00

is a max limit on

2:04

who could be in here. So if you end up wondering

2:07

off if you could cancel or exit, you can

2:09

always listen to it later, but it would

2:12

be better for other people who might want to come in because there are

2:14

some limits. There are some limits. So

2:17

I don't have any particular big format for this.

2:19

If you would like to ask

2:21

a question, you can type

2:24

it in the chat. I'll just pause here

2:26

for a second in case anybody has something

2:28

that they would like to

2:31

ask or talk about right away. Don't

2:37

forget to unmute, of course, if you do have

2:39

such questions. All

2:47

right, somebody still is unmuted, but that's all right.

2:49

Just remember to mute if you can. So

2:56

there's a great quote from, thus

2:59

spoke, Zarathustra from

3:01

Nietzsche, the philosopher who is mostly

3:04

peachy. And he

3:07

wrote, so much kindness, so

3:09

much weakness do I see, so much

3:13

justice and pity, so much weakness, round,

3:17

fair, considerate they are to one another

3:19

as grains of sand around fair and

3:21

considerate to grains of sand. In

3:24

the hearts they want

3:26

simply one thing most of all, that

3:28

no one hurt them. Thus

3:31

do they anticipate everyone's wishes and do

3:33

well unto everyone. That

3:36

however is cowardice, though it

3:38

be called virtue. But

3:42

they lack fists, their figures do not know

3:44

how to creep behind fists. Virtue

3:46

for them is what maketh modest and tame.

3:49

Therewith have they made the wolf a dog

3:52

and man himself man's best

3:55

domestic animal. Ooh, that's so

3:57

good. That's

3:59

the kind of. prose that I pray

4:01

to the Battlestar

4:03

Galactica gods to bless my

4:06

brain with on speaking. And

4:08

that's just lovely. That's just lovely.

4:11

And that's what's great about Nietzsche. He's

4:13

half religious, half aphorism, but it

4:16

packs an emotional wallop, sometimes second to

4:18

none. So I just thought that was really, really

4:20

great. Now there's, and if

4:22

you want to talk, just, uh, I'll just throw

4:24

something in, in the chat, just say, you know,

4:26

drop a T in here, uh,

4:29

in the chat if you want to talk and

4:31

we'll, we'll take it from there. There's

4:33

a, a

4:36

book called disappointing affirmations. It's,

4:39

it's a little harsh. It's a

4:41

little harsh. And some

4:44

of them are, um, stop

4:48

overthinking. You're the only one who

4:51

cares. Yeah. That's interesting. I remember hearing this

4:53

many, many years ago, it actually had a fairly

4:56

large impact on me. Which

4:58

was somebody said, you think

5:00

everyone's thinking about you. This is because they

5:03

call it the spotlight phenomenon that you feel

5:05

like everyone's looking at you. Uh, you

5:07

make a mistake, you mess up and,

5:09

and everyone's looking at you and then they think

5:11

about it and it echoes in your brain. And

5:14

it's a sort of basic

5:17

empathy thing where you say,

5:19

everyone's thinking about me and the mistake I made.

5:21

It's like, okay, no, they're

5:24

not, they're not. They're thinking that everyone's thinking

5:26

about them and the mistake they made. Right.

5:28

And it is really not

5:30

the case. If you think people are

5:33

thinking about you all the time, all

5:35

you have to do is think

5:37

how often you think of other people rather

5:40

than your own problems. So, uh,

5:45

this is a pretty harsh one. Don't let anyone make

5:47

you feel bad about yourself. That's your job

5:50

and nobody does it better. I thought

5:52

that was kind of funny. Another one, it's

5:55

never too late to change. So just wait

5:57

until you absolutely have to. Right.

6:00

Another one, picture of a mountainside. It says,

6:05

you will never be alone. All the

6:07

stupid things you've ever said and done will always be

6:09

there to haunt you. Another

6:14

one, just because it didn't work out doesn't

6:16

mean you failed. You successfully f'd

6:18

it up. Let's

6:22

see here. This is the introvert's

6:25

prayer. I'm exactly where I want

6:27

to be at home, avoiding people.

6:31

Another one is, ask the

6:33

universe for guidance, then just go and do whatever

6:35

stupid shit you were going to do anyway. I

6:40

had one of these demotivational

6:42

posters actually hanging in my office and it

6:44

was a ship upending into

6:46

the water. It said, it could be that the

6:49

only purpose of your life is to serve as

6:51

a warning to others. I thought that was a

6:55

really great way of putting

6:57

it. It could be. That's

6:59

all it could be sometimes. All

7:02

right. Why is this not giving

7:04

me my bookmarks again? I must know. There we

7:06

go. All right. Now,

7:12

there was a psychologist named Laszlo

7:14

Pahlgar and he had this theory that

7:16

any child could become a genius in

7:19

any chosen field with

7:21

early training. He took his daughters

7:24

and he taught his daughters in chess

7:26

from about the age of four and all three

7:29

of his daughters went on to become chess prodigies

7:31

and the youngest, whose name is Judith,

7:34

is considered the

7:36

best female player in

7:39

history. I

7:43

think we all know the problem

7:46

with this. If you're a brilliant psychologist

7:48

who believes that any child can become

7:50

a genius and you then train

7:52

your own children, well, you are making

7:58

a fundamental category. which is

8:01

that if you're a brilliant psychologist, and

8:03

I'm certain that he married a brilliant woman,

8:09

well, their children are going to be highly, highly,

8:11

highly intelligent. So, that's

8:14

not... And, you know,

8:16

it's really horrible. It's really...it's actually incredibly

8:18

cruel to say any child can

8:20

become a genius in a chosen field

8:22

with early training. It's not true. You

8:26

know, they tried to close the black-white achievement

8:28

gap, oh, and

8:30

George W. Bush, George

8:33

W. Bush, Jr. And, what's

8:35

it, $100 billion they spent? And they closed it

8:38

very briefly, and then it just went right

8:40

back to where it was, and it's kind

8:42

of cruel. Anyone can be a great singer.

8:46

And it's like, well, okay, if you're the kid of

8:48

a great singer, hey, two great singers

8:50

had a kid and trained that kid on singing, kid did do

8:52

a really good singer. And it's

8:55

like, yeah, well... So,

9:01

it's cruel. It's cruel to think

9:03

that everybody has all of this potential, because

9:05

then people feel like failures when they didn't

9:08

necessarily have the mechanics to succeed. It's

9:14

a pretty good quote from Frank Zappa. He

9:17

was a Lebanese musician, died quite young, I

9:19

think of some sort of bowel cancer or

9:21

something like that. And he had some...he had the

9:23

pretty wild hair and a mustache. And I remember he

9:25

did a... Sting had a

9:27

song when he was with the police called Murder

9:29

by Numbers that's actually quite creepy and good. And

9:32

Frank Zappa did a version with Sting, Mr. Sting, as

9:34

he referred to him. And he said, Frank Zappa said, if

9:38

you end up with a boring, miserable life because you listen to

9:40

your mom, your dad, your teacher, your priest, or some guy on

9:42

television telling you how to do your shit, then

9:44

you deserve it. And I think that

9:47

was quite interesting as

9:49

well. And

9:54

Anichie also said, when we are tired, we

9:56

are attacked by ideas we conquered long ago.

10:00

Victor Frankel, author of Man's Search for Meaning,

10:03

a Holocaust survivor, I believe, he

10:05

said, when a person can't find a deep sense of

10:07

meaning, they distract themselves with pleasure. Indian

10:11

philosopher Chan Nakya said, a man is great

10:13

by deeds, not by birth. Well, that's very

10:15

true. Lao

10:19

Tzu, great Chinese philosopher, said, doing nothing

10:21

is better than being busy doing nothing.

10:24

Very true. You ever had one of those jobs? You ever

10:26

had one of those jobs where you have to look busy? Ooh,

10:29

ooh, that's very tough. Ooh,

10:32

that's very tough. Now, somebody, if you're not

10:34

muted, if you could just remember to mute. Now,

10:37

this is an unknown, and it really, it hit

10:39

me in the feels, man, if not the nads

10:41

themselves. And it's a

10:43

picture of a, I guess, a

10:45

Roman warrior. And the quote is, he

10:48

who sweats more in training bleeds

10:50

less in war. That's a

10:52

great quote. He who sweats

10:54

more in training bleeds less in

10:58

war. And that's

11:00

very powerful because preparing for

11:02

life, you know, I love this concept of

11:04

choose your suffering. Just

11:07

choose your suffering. And

11:10

you can either suffer now by eating

11:12

less, or you can suffer later by being fat.

11:15

You can either suffer now by working out hard, or

11:18

you can suffer later by injuring

11:22

yourself or, you know, being flabby or lazy

11:24

or out of breath. Like it's just choose

11:26

your suffering. There is no not suffering. There's

11:29

only you choose your suffering. Well, I don't want to work out. Okay.

11:32

Then you're choosing another kind of suffering.

11:36

Just a reminder for those of you who've just joined,

11:38

welcome to the slightly different Friday

11:41

Night Live. And you

11:43

can type, just hit the word T

11:46

here to

11:48

talk and you can unmute or, you know, you

11:50

can just unmute and interrupt. So it's a show

11:52

for you. It's a show for you. This

11:57

woman. wrote

12:00

on twitter or x

12:02

now she wrote to confession time

12:04

i'm always forty nine zero retirement

12:06

savings no exaggeration absolutely nothing. Maybe

12:09

about nine hundred dollars in my checking account

12:11

no idea what the f i'm

12:13

gonna do i know i can be the

12:15

only one. That

12:18

is really really something. That

12:22

is really really something.

12:27

Yeah there is necessary suffering and stupid suffering

12:29

yes. Yeah i

12:32

mean you either do the right thing now or you suffer

12:34

the pain of regret later. There

12:38

is no there's no non suffering there's

12:41

only the deferral of suffering and the

12:43

deferral of suffering is usually. A

12:47

cause of greater suffering than if you just do

12:49

it now. So

12:53

do you hit me with the number of people i'll check the

12:55

chat here hit me with the number of people. That

12:58

you know who have

13:00

pretty much smack saved up for retirement now they could

13:02

say. Oh i have an

13:04

asset and so on like but house is

13:06

not a pretty particularly fantastic acid i mean

13:08

i suppose. If you have a

13:10

bigger house you can sell the house if you can move

13:12

to a condo or some smaller place because you retired. But

13:15

i don't know i

13:18

think it's i think it's still pretty good for i'm

13:20

not sure that i want to be old and living in a condo

13:22

myself because i'd like to be sort of out as much. But

13:25

yeah how many people do you know who

13:27

don't really seem to have much set

13:29

aside for retirement. Because it

13:31

seems to be a pretty big thing for

13:34

a lot of people are they just i guess what

13:36

are they gonna rely on the state they gonna rely

13:38

like on what. So

13:40

people are saying only one i know of

13:43

one everyone i know zero yeah.

13:47

I know i know a number of people who

13:49

have not saved up for or not let me

13:51

let me rephrase that i used

13:53

to know a number of people who have not saved up.

13:56

For retirement now why

13:58

don't i know anyone. anymore.

14:00

Why am I not close to anyone anymore who

14:02

hasn't saved up for retirement? Because you know at

14:04

57 it's not exactly

14:08

way over the horizon because

14:10

they will all come and knock and that's right James.

14:13

That's exactly right. They

14:16

all gonna come and knock in. Knock

14:20

knock knock in on Stephen's door. Yep,

14:22

they're all gonna come knock in and

14:24

you know part

14:27

of getting older is pruning those who

14:30

are going to be in desperate need of

14:32

everything. Part

14:35

of pruning

14:37

as you get older is

14:39

the people and it's also it's like the

14:41

people who don't take care of

14:43

their health are going to be less

14:46

and less fun to know when they

14:48

get older. Somebody

14:52

says I know one he's late 40s who will be

14:54

able to retire at 65 with his 401k

14:56

in house but like you said the house is not an asset

14:58

for retirement and I agree yeah yeah.

15:02

Oh for someone here says they're already knocking yeah yeah

15:04

says I knew two people at my job who around

15:06

150k a year and they both say they cannot retire

15:09

until they're at least 70. Yeah yeah

15:14

I mean I was a little bit I

15:16

mean I started saving for this stuff kind of early I

15:18

mean I got life insurance in my early 20s just because

15:20

it's real cheap back then and by the time I was

15:23

35 it's all paying for itself because I put

15:25

a little bit extra in and now they don't charge me haven't

15:27

charged me for like over 20 years

15:31

but there are sorry just a reminder if you've joined if

15:33

you could remember to mute please it's a little bit of

15:36

background noise so it

15:38

is rough man and and the people who get older

15:40

if they're in bad health and

15:42

and I mean chosen bad health you know

15:44

three-quarters of people's health problems are

15:47

the result of lifestyle choices so

15:49

the people who they have an exercise they're overweight

15:51

so you just I've pruned those

15:53

people long ago because well

15:57

I like to do things with people like

16:00

when I socialize. I don't just want to sit on the

16:02

couch and chat. I do that sometimes and that's fun, dinner

16:04

parties are fun, but I want to go

16:06

do things. You know, when we have people over, let's

16:09

do a sport, let's go for a hike, let's

16:11

play pick a ball, let's you know, whatever, right?

16:15

And I just have less and less in

16:18

common with people who have less

16:20

and less strength and mobility. And

16:24

they're going to start needing things and they're going to

16:26

start having complaints and problems. And

16:28

I just, you know, the old sort of, the old

16:31

myth about, you

16:33

know, what happens, people get older, oh,

16:35

we just sit around complaining about how

16:37

expensive our medication is and we just

16:39

sit around complaining about all the aches

16:41

and pains that we have. And it's

16:43

like, I cannot, I

16:45

cannot. And I do

16:48

remind people that I know, like, you know,

16:50

really try to avoid that kind of stuff

16:53

as a whole. Oh yes, of course, freedomaid.com/donate. I

16:55

forgot to mention that too, if you'd like to

16:57

help out the show, I really would

16:59

appreciate it. We're going to have something pretty cool for you guys

17:01

soon. Pretty cool for you

17:03

guys soon. And

17:06

we are, obviously we take your support and

17:08

donations very seriously and are always trying to

17:11

apply what you offer

17:13

in, out of the kindness and charity of your

17:15

heart, what you offer, we try to put to

17:17

the very, very best use. And

17:20

we really do appreciate, everyone's really

17:23

enjoying the real-time relationships, AI,

17:25

that's the most popular one, which is very, and it

17:27

sort of goes in accord with the call-in shows. And

17:31

people are still enjoying very much the staff

17:33

bot AI, the peaceful parenting AI is getting

17:35

heavy use and so on. So, somebody

17:40

says, all the people that won't work to change

17:42

their lives are just a drag. I've been pruning

17:44

and surrounding myself with people who are ambitious and

17:46

trying to improve the situation, slash

17:49

driven people. Yeah. That

17:51

describes my old mother to a tee, always

17:54

complaining about some ailment never exercised in her

17:56

life. Yeah. I mean, I

17:58

swear to God, my mother lived on. I've

18:01

been living on coffee and

18:03

nicotine. That's an old

18:05

song from Gerald Groh. My mom was

18:07

like, Nest Cafe, instant coffee,

18:10

and Dunn Hills, cigarettes. Oof.

18:16

Wouldn't really exercise. And

18:18

she was skinny because she barely ate anything, but

18:21

yeah, wouldn't really exercise, smoked. No,

18:24

she didn't smoke much. She wasn't like a chimney smoker, but she certainly smoked. And

18:26

then we complained about her health. And I'd say, well, maybe

18:29

you could do this, that, and the other. Here's

18:31

the other thing about health. I

18:33

sort of mentioned this briefly before, but I

18:36

really can't emphasize or express this often

18:38

enough that you

18:40

just don't know when you're going to need to

18:42

withdraw from the old health bank. So

18:45

when I got cancer, what,

18:47

10 or 11 years ago, whatever it was,

18:51

I needed to withdraw from the old health bank

18:53

to beat the cancer. And

18:58

I will never ever begrudge. And occasionally I think

19:00

of the amount of time I spend exercising and

19:03

it's like, it feels

19:06

a little bit like it's taking time off your life. Now I get

19:08

it. It sort of helps you

19:10

with all of that going forward stuff.

19:13

But man, man, man, man, it

19:15

is so important because

19:18

you just don't know. You just don't

19:20

know. You

19:23

don't know when you're going to need to have

19:25

a big withdrawal for whatever reason. Steph,

19:29

do you have any recommendations on how to best

19:31

use the AIs you've released? I'm

19:35

not sure I understand the question. Just

19:37

ask it what you want to know the most and see how

19:39

it responds. I mean, you can look up

19:42

how to work with

19:44

AIs as a home. But

19:46

somebody says, I told my mom to take better care

19:48

of her health because she would get sick. She said,

19:50

all old people get sick. That's just how it works.

19:53

Okay, but sickness is different from

19:55

entropy, like the wearing out

19:57

of stuff. But

20:00

when I was younger, I just didn't really understand

20:02

how this kind of stuff worked. And I was like,

20:04

oh, you know, maybe if I walk too much, I'll

20:06

wear out the cartilage in my knees. And

20:09

it's like, no, no, because the more you walk, the more your

20:11

cartilage regenerates and is healthy. Like it's, in a sense, as far

20:13

as I understand it, it's like a muscle. And

20:15

so, you know, use it or lose it. Or if you

20:17

ain't using it, you're abusing it. And

20:21

there's one thing to get

20:23

old, obviously, there's going to be some decay,

20:26

a little bit of decay. That's

20:28

the illness. I don't know that that's entirely

20:31

necessary. And you can see, I saw

20:33

a video the other day, this woman, she's a

20:35

grandmother, she's in her late 70s, and

20:37

she's working out of the gym pretty hard. She's full

20:40

of muscles. You

20:43

don't have to be soft, flabby, and

20:45

falling apart when you're old. Personally,

20:47

I mean, my sort of amateur view

20:50

on this kind of stuff is that people

20:52

are punishing themselves for bad things they did. Like they

20:54

don't take care of their health because they

20:57

are punishing themselves for bad things they

20:59

did. If you do bad things, I'm

21:01

not saying everybody, but I think a lot of people, like it's

21:03

just so, it just makes so little sense

21:06

to let yourself go like that. I mean, it just

21:08

makes so little, like, why would you do that? Why

21:11

would you? You're given

21:13

this incredible, beautiful, amazing,

21:16

wonderful, perfect body.

21:20

And you just take a slow,

21:23

high cholesterol dump all over it. It just seems

21:25

completely bizarre to me. It's like

21:27

being given a bazillion

21:29

dollars and then spending

21:31

it all on fillets of fish or something. It

21:34

just makes no sense to

21:38

me. Just makes no sense to me. Somebody

21:41

said, I had quite the back injury at work earlier this

21:43

week. I've been recovering well, most of you to being in

21:45

overall good health. Oh yeah, no, they were

21:47

pretty clear with me. They said, you're probably bringing

21:49

a beat this cancer because you're so healthy. And

21:53

yeah, I just, and it's

21:55

like, or the stress of

21:57

like, I

21:59

don't know. you get a twinge in your chest and

22:01

if you have an exercise or whatever, right? Every

22:04

now and then, everybody, I think everyone gets twinges

22:06

all over their body and I don't worry about

22:08

that stuff because I know my

22:10

heart's good because I just cardio or whatever, right? So,

22:15

anyway. So, let's see here. Yeah, old

22:19

people haven't taken care of themselves with say things like,

22:21

you'll be old one day. It's like, yeah, and

22:23

I'm still doing pretty much the same workout I did in

22:26

my teens. And I'm

22:28

not some big muscle guy. I don't have any

22:30

particularly new fabled genetics or muscle or anything

22:32

like that. Just keep

22:34

doing it. Just keep doing it. Just keep doing

22:36

it. I mean, life without moving

22:40

is not even worth getting out of bed for

22:42

as far as I'm concerned. Let's

22:46

see here. Finished peaceful parenting. Yesterday, I signed up

22:48

for therapy. Finished peaceful

22:51

parenting. Yesterday, I signed up for

22:53

therapy. Oh, well, that's good to hear. I'm glad

22:55

that the book had an impact on you and

22:58

all of that. Often,

23:02

though, bad things are done to them and people

23:04

will eat to distract themselves from their past trauma.

23:07

Yes. So, I

23:10

think having a bad conscience takes away your

23:12

dopamine and then people need to find a

23:14

way to replace that dopamine and they do that with

23:16

sex, they do that with drugs, they do that with

23:18

food. I mean, I suppose some people do it with

23:20

exercise too, but a bad conscience

23:22

is a pretty terrible thing to have in

23:25

your brain and people distract themselves

23:27

in their bad conscience all the time and they

23:30

look for substitutes. I mean, the

23:32

ultimate dopamine is a good conscience. It's a good

23:34

relationship with yourself. Having done reasonably well

23:36

in the battle for virtue in this

23:38

darkening world, that's the best you could

23:40

hope for. And to

23:45

have a good conscience is

23:48

the best reward of all. And because it's

23:50

through that reward that all other rewards like love

23:52

and self respect come, having a good conscience is

23:54

the best reward of all. And I

23:56

don't know, you guys tell me, have you had

23:58

or what have you seen? Have you

24:00

had or what

24:03

have you seen in terms

24:05

of people who've had a bad conscience and

24:07

how miserable they are?

24:09

Oh gosh. And they will

24:12

constantly insist that they're happy, but

24:15

there's a restlessness. You know those people?

24:18

What is it? Someone said that the all of

24:20

life's problems stem from people's inability to sit in

24:22

an hour, in

24:24

a room quietly for an hour with themselves. This

24:27

restlessness, you've known these people? They're

24:30

like sharks. They can't stop moving. They've got no

24:32

bladder. They've got no buoyancy. They just have to

24:34

swim, swim, eat, eat, swim, swim. Restlessness,

24:37

right? They sit down and they're bored and irritated and,

24:39

oh, this is so boring. And you know, they're just

24:41

restless. It's like everywhere they sit

24:44

is vague cactus and everywhere they walk is

24:46

against the wind. It's

24:48

really, really unpleasant.

24:50

I find those kinds of people pretty

24:53

unbearable to be around. If you

24:55

can't just enjoy your own company, if you can't

24:57

just sit with your own thoughts. I mean, I

24:59

obviously have, you know, 4,000 idea

25:01

hamsters working at cocaine levels

25:03

in my brain at all times. So for me,

25:05

my brain is a circus. Like it's a really

25:08

fun place to be in terms of debates and

25:10

I always enjoy that time alone or

25:12

walking or whatever it is. When

25:14

I'm podcasting while walking around, I'm doing kind of

25:16

the same thing that I'm doing while

25:18

I'm walking around without podcasting. So

25:21

yeah, those restless people, I grew

25:23

up with one. It's just, it's

25:26

just appalling. So

25:30

let's see here. What

25:33

is it? $517

25:36

billion in unrealized losses hits the US

25:38

banking system as FDIC won 63 lenders

25:40

who were on the brink of insolvency four

25:43

days ago. So you know, who knows

25:45

what happens to people's retirement savings. From

25:49

September 2022, defying science,

25:51

American parents are turning away from male

25:53

circumcision. Excellent. Excellent.

25:57

Excellent. I read, I

25:59

started. to read. I would say that

26:01

I have a fairly strong stomach. I

26:04

have a fairly strong stomach and

26:06

I can take a fair amount

26:09

when it comes to fairly horrifying

26:11

information. So if

26:13

everyone here has ever been truly

26:15

naughty, I will read from a

26:17

thread I saved. A

26:20

few people shared their worst

26:23

sex experiences. And

26:28

I was vaguely curious. Obviously I

26:30

went in with a full hazmat suit.

26:33

I read a couple and I was like, I

26:35

now need to burn my tablet

26:38

with holy water. It's like, oh my God.

26:41

So if you ever really bad, I will

26:44

lock you down and I

26:46

will read to you from some of these worst

26:49

sex experiences. I don't mean to tease you. Trust

26:51

me, you'll be very happy that I didn't read

26:53

them because that stuff, it's like reading about that

26:55

guy who in Germany who advertised

26:57

that he wanted to be eaten by a cannibal.

26:59

And, you know, like these

27:02

are things you don't want in your head. So

27:04

I, I, I bookmarked it and I was like, oh

27:06

gosh, what, this could be kind of funny and interesting.

27:08

And I was like, oh God,

27:11

I've been turned to salt. So

27:15

here's another one that I thought was interesting. This is

27:17

posted by Eric Hall. And

27:19

he said, they buried the lead on this

27:21

new study. It's not that exercise beats out

27:24

SSRIs for depression treatment. It's that just dancing

27:26

has the largest effect of any treatment for

27:29

depression. That's kind of beautiful. Isn't

27:31

that neat? Isn't

27:34

that neat? So

27:37

in terms of benefits, in

27:41

terms of benefits, this is the list

27:43

from most beneficial. No,

27:46

this is not, no, no kind of advice. I'm just reading

27:48

your data, right? So don't do anything based

27:50

upon what some podcaster says, right? But this

27:53

is the, this is the data. So from.

28:00

from most beneficial to

28:04

least beneficial. Number

28:07

one, dance. You

28:10

can boogie your blues away. And

28:13

it's funny, you know, I used to, when

28:16

I was in my teens, I had a,

28:18

I can't even remember where I got them

28:20

from, but I got a

28:22

really great pair of Sennheiser headphones that just

28:24

had fantastic sound. And

28:28

somewhere along the way, I lost the headband, and I

28:30

ended up having to use a coat hanger and duct

28:32

tape to get them around my head. But

28:34

I used to stand

28:37

in a darkened room in my teens when

28:39

nobody was home, and

28:41

I would put on two songs and just dance like

28:43

crazy to them. One was Face the Face by Pete

28:45

Townsend, the other was It Can Happen

28:47

by Yes. And,

28:50

I mean, Pete Townsend was a little easier to dance to.

28:52

Not that he makes a lot of dance music, but that's

28:54

a fantastic dance song called Face the Face. I

28:57

mean, it's got a drum like gunshots through

28:59

the ears, and the Yes song

29:01

is just so powerful and inspiring.

29:03

It's just a beautiful, beautiful

29:05

song. So, yeah, dance

29:07

is fantastic. And I used to go, gosh, I think starting

29:10

from the age of 15 or 16, I

29:12

used to go to discos. I went to

29:14

one called Nuts and Bolts. Didn't even really think about the

29:16

meeting. It's been until years later, and I

29:18

remember some kids from my high school finally came in when they

29:21

were 17 and were very impressed to see me boogying away. I

29:23

just danced. I danced my teens

29:25

away. Absolutely loved it. And

29:27

so, yeah, dance is number one, according to

29:29

the data for depression. Walking

29:32

or jogging, number two, cognitive behavioral

29:35

therapy, number three, yoga, number four.

29:38

Exercise plus SSRI, number five,

29:40

aerobic exercise plus therapy. Next

29:44

is strength. Next is relaxation. Next

29:46

is mixed aerobic exercises. Next is

29:48

tai chi or quick og. Aerobic

29:51

exercise plus strength training. Next, cycling.

29:53

Next, SSRI. Next, physical

29:56

activity counseling. Next,

29:58

and wait list control. So

30:02

dance. You can

30:04

dance your cares away.

30:06

And you see, this is why, this is why

30:09

not many people know this statistically. Not

30:11

many people know that this is why COVID

30:14

went away. It's because of all those TikTok dances.

30:17

All negativity can go

30:19

away because of that. All

30:21

right. Let me get to your questions, comments. Yeah.

30:23

I haven't, somebody says, yeah, I haven't been able

30:25

to finish Peaceful Parenting now. It is a lot.

30:27

Did start therapy and have

30:29

been relentlessly trying to clean my conscience and offer

30:31

restitution. Everyone has been like, you don't owe me

30:33

anything. If that's the worst you've done, you'll be fine. Hmm.

30:37

Somebody says I have a step grandfather who's

30:40

drank himself into dementia, had a very

30:42

abusive father and was also one himself. Him

30:45

and all his descendants are addicted to something. Yeah.

30:49

Yes, indeed. Yes, a bad conscience will

30:51

make you do some pretty self destructive

30:53

things. Even

30:58

worse than the bad sex experiences. Oh,

31:04

the library of Alexandria. So

31:08

what was last when the library of Alexandria burned in

31:10

the ancient world? Well, our entire, this

31:12

is from cultural critic. Well, our entire

31:14

knowledge of the Greco Roman world comes from about 500

31:17

volumes. 700,000 scrolls

31:21

were potentially lost at Alexandria alone.

31:25

Our entire knowledge of the Greco Roman world comes from about

31:27

500 volumes. 700,000 scrolls were burned in Alexandria.

31:34

Alexandria was once antiquity's greatest city,

31:36

a trade port connecting Africa, Europe

31:39

and Asia. When Ptolemy, when Ptolemy

31:41

took control of Egypt in 305 BC, after the death

31:44

of Alexander the great, he built Alexandria

31:47

into his thriving capital. He

31:49

wanted it to be the intellectual center of the world. The

31:51

new Greece, he had a great library

31:53

and museum built and the lighthouse was

31:56

one of the seven wonders of the ancient world. The

31:58

library was to contain all all the knowledge

32:01

of antiquity under one roof. Ptolemy

32:06

acquired books aggressively and scholars came across

32:08

from across Egypt, Greece, Persia,

32:11

and India and were paid handsomely. Every

32:15

ship docking in Alexandria had to submit all written

32:17

material on board for the library to make copies.

32:20

It became the world's largest collection

32:24

of manuscripts, some say 700,000

32:26

scrolls at its peak.

32:29

So what was really in there and what did we lose? Ptolemy's

32:35

buying spree furnished it with manuscripts of

32:37

incalculable value, Plato, Homer, Herodotus,

32:39

and very significant original work took

32:42

place. Earth's circumference was

32:44

calculated for the first time in Alexandria.

32:49

Among the most precious lost works were

32:51

the writings of Aristotle, which Ptolemy II

32:53

paid a fortune to acquire. Ptolemy

32:57

wrote as many as 200 treatises in

32:59

his life across philosophy, natural sciences, economics.

33:03

Today we have just 30 of them, none of

33:05

which survive in complete form. Just

33:08

these had a measurable impact for centuries, so

33:10

imagine what might have been in the remaining

33:16

There were the last plays of Aeschylus and Sophocles who

33:18

wrote over 73 and over 100 plays respectively,

33:21

the vast majority now missing. They

33:24

might have been foundational works of Western literature and

33:26

taught us things about Greek life we'll never know. But

33:31

if we could have just one last item back, it would

33:33

easily be the Pinacchis of

33:36

Kalamakis. Kalamakis was a librarian who cataloged

33:38

the library by subject, author, with

33:41

a summary of each book's contents, the first time this was

33:43

ever done in the West. It

33:45

was 120 papyrus rolls of information,

33:47

essentially a detailed guide of the entire

33:50

intellectual world of antiquity. It

33:52

hurts to think just how much we might know if it

33:55

had been recovered. happened

34:00

to this library? We don't really

34:02

know. Some say Caesar's men raised it

34:04

by accident during a civil war in 48 BC, or

34:07

Diocletian did when he sat the city in 298 AD. These events

34:12

likely did damage, but something worse happened.

34:16

Texts throughout history weren't generally lost in

34:18

fires, but because they

34:21

weren't copied in the first place. Cultures

34:24

need a reason to preserve them. We have so

34:26

much Virgil and Homer today because they were in

34:28

school curricula for centuries. And

34:30

remember, papyrus was fragile enough that regular

34:32

handling eroded it. Ancient libraries had to

34:35

continually re-copy their text, so commitment was

34:37

required to maintain them. If

34:39

that commitment fell away, so

34:42

did the knowledge. The

34:45

fate of Aristotle's works is unclear, but one

34:48

account says they weren't

34:50

burned, but confiscated by

34:52

Sulla. Why? The

34:55

historian Plutarch said it was because they had

34:57

fallen into idle and base hands.

35:02

Alexandria's texts were at risk long before any

35:04

disaster struck. Successors to Ptolemy didn't share his

35:07

commitment to knowledge, and the library fell into

35:09

disuse. By

35:11

400 AD, there are no accounts of

35:13

a great library at Alexandria at all.

35:17

The great library died because classical culture did.

35:21

Cultures aren't lost in great fires. They

35:23

die from something much worse. Apathy.

35:30

It's very powerful and it's agonizing.

35:32

No, no off-site backup. Are they

35:35

crazy? The most important stuff is

35:37

philosophy. No

35:39

off-site backup. A

35:44

man whose wife was lost in Japan's 2011 tsunami

35:47

still goes diving every week in the

35:49

hope of finding her body 11 years

35:51

later. Wow. Wow.

35:58

We do backups. And

36:00

you understand why it's very

36:03

important that we have you doing our

36:05

backups as well. And

36:13

that's really something. That's

36:17

really something. Now,

36:20

let's see here and see if I can just

36:22

hold this up to the mic in some very

36:24

sophisticated fashion. I don't know

36:26

if you've ever heard, there seems to be

36:28

a tiny, tiny little bit of complaining about where all

36:30

the good men have gone. So

36:33

let's see. I don't know if we can hear this or not, but let's

36:35

crank it up and see. Not

36:38

sure why nobody wants to speak up about this, but I guess

36:40

I'll be the one to do it. There

36:42

is a serious shortage of

36:45

attractive, eligible, mentally

36:47

stable, emotionally available men.

36:50

We need to get a search party together, figure out

36:52

what has happened. Where have they gone? I'm

36:56

not sure why nobody wants to speak up about this, but I

36:58

guess I'll be the one to do it. There

37:00

is a serious shortage of

37:03

attractive, eligible, mentally

37:06

stable, emotionally available men.

37:08

We need to get a search party together, figure out

37:10

what has happened. Where have they gone? I'm

37:13

not sure why nobody wants to speak up about this.

37:16

Yes. So sorry, there was just a bunch of

37:18

messages in Tim in that dimmed her out. So

37:21

that is a very, very big question.

37:25

Where have all the good men gone? Where

37:28

have all the good

37:30

men gone? All

37:34

right, let me just see here. Steph,

37:37

what a great topic and article.

37:40

I love hearing you speak and read. This is a fantastic

37:42

Friday night Skype call. I appreciate that. Thank you. Have

37:46

you considered sharing also the AI language model so we

37:48

can back them up too? I'm

37:50

not sure what that

37:53

might entail. I'm

37:55

not sure what that might entail. So

37:59

what do you guys think? I think, is it true? For

38:02

the men and the women here, is it true that there

38:04

is a shortage of good men to date? I know that

38:06

men complain about this with regards to women. Yeah,

38:08

where have all the cowboys gone? That's

38:10

that poor local, right? Yeah,

38:14

that's a way old song. But

38:17

yeah, where have all the good people to date gone?

38:21

Somebody says, yes, there is a, dun

38:24

dun dun, there is a what? Shorted,

38:27

there is a shortage. It's

38:30

not this funny because there doesn't seem to be a

38:32

shortage of attractive people as a whole, but

38:36

there does seem to be a shortage of attractive

38:39

men. Now

38:45

to me, this is the wages

38:48

of sin. To me,

38:50

I think that there is a shortage of attractive

38:52

men. And I'm sure that's the case with women

38:54

too, but I think that there is a shortage

38:56

of attractive men. And,

39:01

you know, women don't blame themselves for much, in

39:05

general, right? There's exceptions, but women don't blame themselves for

39:07

much. So the simple answer to

39:09

me is, well, women voted

39:12

to take away the negative consequences of not having

39:14

a good father in the home. Right,

39:18

so women voted to have a welfare state,

39:20

which means that not having

39:23

a good, strong father in the

39:25

home, that's, there's

39:28

no consequences for that. In fact,

39:30

there's positive consequences for having

39:32

a child outside of wedlock because you

39:34

get to stay home and raise your kids, and

39:38

you don't have to serve a

39:40

husband. A husband doesn't have to serve his wife,

39:42

of course. So

39:44

when voters, and this was women, right? Women

39:46

drove the welfare state. You don't get a

39:49

welfare state in general without women voting. So

39:51

women drove the welfare state, the single mother state. So

39:54

women said, hey, you know, it'd be

39:56

great if we... pay

40:00

women who have children

40:03

with unsuitable men and then

40:05

drive those men away. And it's not

40:07

just the welfare state. I mean another form of the welfare

40:10

state is alimony, child support and all that

40:12

kind of nonsense, right? It's just another form

40:14

of welfare

40:16

state. So they're going to say, okay, so

40:18

if we massively incentivize women to

40:22

have children with bad men, unsuitable men,

40:24

and or drive those men away. So

40:27

if we have an

40:29

entire generation of men raised without

40:31

fathers, an entire generation of boys

40:33

raised without fathers, oh,

40:36

wait a minute. Our daughters

40:38

are having a tough time finding

40:41

men they want to date.

40:45

Well, honey, ladies, are

40:48

the fairest sex, so often

40:50

the unfair sex. Ladies,

40:52

ladies, ladies. You

40:54

voted to take fathers out of the home, and

40:57

now you're complaining that your daughters

41:00

don't have strong men to date. Are

41:04

you kidding me? You've

41:09

absolutely completely and totally got

41:11

to be kidding me. We

41:15

had our daughters raised by the

41:17

all-man, he-man, woman-haters club. Turns out

41:19

they didn't grow up to be

41:21

very feminine or attractive. Wouldn't that

41:23

be not shocking? Are

41:27

you kidding me? You

41:29

demonized men, you drive them out of

41:31

the home. Everything's toxic masculinity. Men are

41:33

bad. Patriarchy, male shoving his pig, blah

41:36

blah blah blah blah. We're

41:39

gonna have nothing but

41:42

female teachers, female daycare workers,

41:45

mothers at home, boys can get to the

41:48

age of their mid-teens never coming across a

41:50

male authority figure of any

41:52

way shape or form. Oh, no, isn't that

41:54

weird? Isn't

41:57

it weird that we don't see?

42:00

seem to have strong men that

42:02

we want to date? I

42:06

don't... You

42:10

literally injected three generations worth

42:12

of testosterone into

42:14

women and estrogen into men

42:17

and oh my gosh, there seems to

42:19

be a slight lack of attractiveness everywhere.

42:22

What a shock! Well

42:24

that's why we used to have a rule called Thou

42:26

shalt not steal. And thou

42:28

shalt accept the consequences of

42:31

bad decisions. Thou

42:34

shalt accept the consequences of

42:36

bad decisions. No

42:39

no no, say the female voters, no no no, you've

42:41

got to be kidding me. It

42:44

wasn't her fault. I mean he just

42:46

changed. Bad things happen, nobody could

42:48

tell, it couldn't be predicted, he just, you know,

42:50

there's no way to the no red flags. We

42:53

can't possibly tell a good

42:55

man from a bad man, but

42:58

we really really really want to be able to

43:00

vote for politicians. See we can't tell, we can't

43:03

possibly tell who would or would not be

43:05

a good

43:09

father for our own children, but

43:12

we can totally tell an honest politician.

43:17

I can't do these shows without

43:20

half dying from laughter sometimes. We

43:24

spread our legs for every random tattooed

43:26

junkie in the neighborhood, but don't worry,

43:28

we can tell who's going to be

43:31

a fantastic president. We can't tell the

43:34

quality of men we let inside our

43:36

bodies, but we can

43:38

totally tell an honest

43:40

politician with integrity. I'm

43:45

dying. Oh

43:50

my gosh, how do

43:52

people survive this planet with even remotely

43:55

a straight face? I just, I

43:58

do not understand it. Oh

44:00

my gosh, just crazy. Alright.

44:06

Retail is facing a multi-100 billion

44:08

dollar problem. Excess inventory is up

44:11

23%, sales growth is down 5.8%,

44:14

foot traffic is down 2.3%, year

44:16

over year at malls, on Black Friday. But

44:21

it gets even worse. So...

44:27

Did you know... A

44:29

list of retailers who've announced closures

44:31

so far this year alone. I

44:34

get to see a lot of the stuff in the economy because

44:36

I toodle around with my daughter during the day sometimes we'll go

44:38

to malls or we'll go if she wants to. She's in a

44:41

teen phase, right? So she's shopping for her dresses and

44:43

prom stuff and all kinds of cool stuff and she

44:46

needs to... She goes to parties and all that. So

44:48

she's into clothing. So

44:51

we're around a lot and the ghost town

44:53

known as malls is really kind of chilling. So

44:57

a list of chains that have announced

44:59

closures this year. Walgreens almost 650 workers

45:01

were laid off. Restructuring

45:04

process of closing 150 stores in

45:06

the US as part

45:08

of a paring down strategy launched in 2023 in a

45:10

bid to cut costs. Well, you

45:12

know, it's kind of a funny thing when you

45:15

stop arresting shoplifters, it turns out that

45:17

the economies die. And

45:19

shoplifters and most criminals, it's the... Pareto

45:22

principle as well. It's a tiny minority of people who

45:24

cause most of the crime as you can see from

45:26

El Salvador. So that's

45:28

Walgreens. Walmart. Walmart is shuttering nine of

45:30

its locations in the US, blaming financial

45:32

underperformance for the decision. It

45:35

does plan to open 14 new sites in 2024. Walmart

45:40

will close five stores in California, of course.

45:44

Of course. So Walmart is

45:46

taxed for a

45:49

justice system and a police system, which

45:51

lets criminals go. And so yeah, it's

45:53

terrible. Roo 21, the teen

45:55

fashion chain is set to close all 540 stores

45:58

after filing for Chapter 11. bankruptcy

46:01

at the beginning of May. The

46:03

Body Shop Cosmetics and Toiletries chain, the Body Shop

46:05

closed all of its US-based operations in March along

46:07

with the closure of dozens of its Canadian stores.

46:11

Family dollars, some 600 family dollar stores were

46:13

shuttered this year with hundreds more closures planned.

46:16

Over the next few years as the discount retailers' location

46:18

leases come to an end. Lost

46:23

by has some, Party City closed

46:25

35 stores after filing for Chapter

46:28

11 bankruptcy protection. CVS,

46:30

hundreds of the drugstore's pharmacy insight inside

46:32

targets were slated for closure. It's

46:35

going to reduce its workforce as well. Foot

46:38

Locker underperforming stores and shopping malls were the focus

46:40

of a shake-up by the sportswear company. Some 400

46:42

stores across North America set to close by 2026.

46:46

Now it's really tragic because I used to meet a lot

46:48

of people and girls in particular at the mall. What's

46:52

that great line from an old

46:54

Kevin Smith movie called Mall Rats? They're

46:57

not there to shop. They're

46:59

not there to work. They're just

47:02

there. Very true, very true.

47:06

99 cents only, all 371 US

47:08

stores will be shuttered as the

47:10

business winds down. Yeah. Clothing

47:14

Chain Express revealed that more than 25 states

47:16

will lose stores as it closes more than

47:19

100 sites after filing for Chapter 11 bankruptcy

47:21

protection. Not ideal at

47:23

all. Indoor

47:26

malls, this is as of six

47:28

days ago, mall

47:30

traffic is down 14.2% versus 2019, outlet

47:34

malls down almost 18%, open air

47:37

center's down almost 12%. And

47:46

so this is part of the COVID

47:48

thing too, right? So once people get used to a

47:50

new habit, they don't really go back to their old habits.

47:52

So under COVID people got used to, and there was

47:54

a barrier for a lot of people. They'd say, oh, you

47:56

know, I like going to malls. I like being able

47:58

to touch the fabric. to see the stuff

48:01

directly. I don't want to shop online. It's

48:03

not blah, blah, blah. And then

48:05

what happens is during COVID, when everything was shut

48:07

down and so on, then people

48:09

got used to shopping online. I

48:13

think we've all had that kind of thing where if something we don't

48:15

want to do, we end up doing it and then it ends up

48:17

being great. So people got used

48:19

to shopping online and

48:23

they got used to, well, I guess I can't see

48:25

it and the tools also improved so that you can

48:27

put the clothes on a virtual model of you and

48:29

see and rotate them and see how they look. Plus

48:31

people get used to the returns thing. I

48:35

used to order things thinking I would return them and

48:38

then I just like, unless they're very expensive, I just

48:40

don't return. They just end up in a box in

48:42

the basement. So I should actually just set fire to

48:44

them and save myself the trouble. But so

48:49

people transitioned to, and

48:51

particularly the boomers, right? And the older people, they transitioned to

48:54

shopping online that they just don't go back to the mall

48:56

now, because that's what they used to. They're

48:58

used to the benefits. They're used to the convenience and so on.

49:00

So they just don't go. And it's also not great for

49:03

a walking cause when you're older, particularly in Canada here,

49:05

right in your older, you go to the mall to

49:07

walk around cause you can't walk around outside cause if

49:10

you're old and you slip and fall, it can be

49:12

a real challenge. So people

49:15

don't do that. So it's

49:17

just another challenge of, of

49:21

COVID. The top retail challenges. This

49:23

is of Q1 2024 top retail

49:26

challenges, inflation costs. Yes.

49:28

Inflation costs, very, very big problem. Revenue 29%.

49:31

Inflation costs, 52% revenue, 29% interest rates rising

49:34

20% adding employee

49:37

benefits for healthcare, 17% supply chain issues, 16% employee

49:41

retention, 12% and

49:43

it sort of goes down from there, but it's a

49:45

brutal thing. It's

49:47

a brutal thing. So big

49:50

problems with retail, right? So the first

49:52

big problem is inventory. And

49:54

this is from Cody Sanchez. When you buy retail supplies

49:56

to sell in your store, you pay for it all

49:58

up front. They ship the. items to you which you

50:00

hold until you can start selling them. Leftover

50:03

infantry, too bad. Order

50:05

full styles and summer accounts sell for 60 to 90 days? Ouch.

50:09

Two, high rent for high traffic. You live and die

50:12

by sales per square foot, but in order

50:14

to get enough volume you have to pay rent that's equivalent.

50:16

It's a paradox that exacerbates

50:18

number three, cash flow problems.

50:21

The cash flow realities of a high overhead

50:23

business model like specialty retail are not to

50:25

be understated. A lot of mom-and-pop stores

50:28

are hobbies funded by people with big pockets or

50:30

marketing to bolster an online brand,

50:33

but we're not talking about mom-and-pop specialty retail, we're

50:35

talking about your mom's department store. What's

50:37

going on with Kohl's, Macy's and others? Let's start

50:39

with the inventory problem. Retailers are

50:42

sitting on a mountain of excess stuff

50:44

they cannot sell. The

50:46

top 20 US apparel companies have 26%

50:49

more inventory than

50:51

pre-pandemic. Why? Shifting

50:53

consumer spending and reduced foot

50:55

traffic. But

50:58

if they want enough foot traffic to move

51:01

all that product, got to get pricey high

51:03

visibility real estate, check out retail rent over

51:05

10 years, even at high volumes. Margins are

51:07

thin and the retail

51:09

is brutal. US

51:11

dollars per square foot and this is normalized

51:13

for inflation. Q2 2013 under $19.5 by

51:18

Q4 2022 is $23 right? So that's a good 20%

51:20

25% increase in that and then

51:29

you've got inflation as well right. Cash flow

51:31

is still brutal to take bed bath and beyond

51:33

they couldn't keep up online then turn to stock

51:35

buyouts another debt for years leading up to a

51:37

bankruptcy. That's

51:39

brutal and bed bath and beyond was unfashionably

51:42

late to the e-commerce gala and didn't adapt

51:44

to changing consumer behaviors but the company also

51:46

made monumental financial mistakes. Since

51:48

2004 it spent almost $12 billion to buy

51:50

back its own shares an

51:53

amount that eclipses the $5.2 billion in debt

51:55

reported in its last SEC filing. The

51:58

company began borrowing money in 2014 to repurchase shares

52:01

and continue doing so through a dismal 2022 holiday

52:03

season. In

52:05

February, a billion-dollar hedge fund deal that was

52:07

a last-ditch effort to stave up bankruptcy failed

52:09

to materialize. It's

52:12

just appalling. So,

52:18

yeah, it's rough, man. Going into stores these

52:20

days is really tough. Is

52:23

really tough. The

52:25

cash register population is down, which means any bulge

52:27

in traffic means a big lineup, which you don't

52:29

want to do. I hate this. Lining

52:31

up in stores, I just hate it. Why am I spending my

52:34

money and my time to buy from you? That

52:36

really doesn't make much sense at

52:38

all. And

52:41

that's really, really rough. And

52:48

I'm happy to take a pause here. I've got

52:50

lots of stuff to talk about, but if you

52:52

have a question or comment, I'm certainly happy to

52:54

hear from it. But I did want to talk

52:56

about sexless marriages. I'm not going to point any

52:58

fingers, obviously, except for you. About

53:04

a year ago, somebody says a CVS employee was rather

53:06

desperate to get me signed up for some new membership

53:09

program. He told me CVS is worried

53:11

Amazon will get into delivering prescriptions. Now

53:13

Amazon has announced they will begin delivering

53:15

medications. Yes. Very

53:17

tough. Very, very

53:20

tough indeed. Just

53:28

hit a T if you wanted to add, or I can keep

53:30

the fear. I consider it a compliment if you want me to

53:32

keep chatting because I've got some very interesting stuff to

53:35

talk about. But if you have questions, comments,

53:37

issues, challenges, problems, criticisms, I'm more than happy

53:39

to hear. All

53:43

right. People are typing. It doesn't take that long

53:45

to type a T, so I'll do the next one. Have you

53:47

heard of this sexless marriage thing? Have

53:50

you heard this sexless marriage

53:53

thing? Ah,

53:57

so somebody wrote, today I gave

53:59

up on sex. with my wife. This

54:01

is my version of a story told many times before. I,

54:03

27-year-old male, am going to

54:06

stop initiating sex with my wife, 25-year-old female,

54:08

because she never initiates. When

54:11

we do have sex, it's only

54:13

because I asked and there's nothing sexy about it.

54:15

All of my sweet talk, subtle gestures, et cetera,

54:18

get me nowhere. I absolutely

54:20

understand that sex is not the be-all and end-all.

54:23

We are extremely compatible and she's my best friend. I've

54:25

heard the phrase, my partner feels more like a roommate,

54:28

and this is helping me understand what I am feeling. She

54:31

has expressed before that sex doesn't hold the same value

54:33

in a relationship that I believe it does, which

54:36

hurt to hear, but I have to respect her opinion.

54:39

Before you comment, talk to her. I can assure

54:41

you I have. We've had

54:43

this discussion about every six months where I admit

54:45

that I am sexually frustrated and want to talk

54:47

about this in a completely neutral environment. Normally

54:50

the conversation leads to her crying and I

54:52

apologize or she says she will be

54:55

more open to initiating, which never happens. I'm

54:57

ashamed to bring this to Reddit, but I need a

55:00

third-party opinion. I love her so much and

55:03

it's hurting. This

55:07

tweet got 22 million views. 22 million

55:14

views.

55:19

Do you know the data on sexless marriages?

55:21

It's a wild thing to me. It's

55:26

a wild thing to me. Let me just find my

55:28

bookmark here. I

55:32

don't know. People just want to fall out of

55:34

the habit or something like

55:36

that. Certainly

55:43

for old people, right, 92% of marriage

55:45

respondents aged 65 to 80 reported

55:47

no sexual intimacy in the past year. Should

55:50

be no reason for that. If you stay healthy. If

55:53

you stay healthy. And

55:57

yeah, the numbers are really... Really

56:00

tough. Really

56:02

tough. So,

56:06

let me just get you some numbers here. In

56:08

a study examining the decision to remain in

56:10

an involuntary celibate relationship, 16%

56:14

of married persons reported not having sex in a month

56:17

prior to being studied. 12%

56:21

of all married persons aged 18 to 16 reported not

56:23

having had sex for at least 3 months prior to

56:25

participating. In

56:29

the study. So,

56:35

in their book, Why Men Stop Having Sex, psychologist

56:37

Bob Berkowitz and his wife Susan Berkowitz report

56:39

on their survey of 4,000 respondents, 33% male, 67% females, which

56:45

focused on people who self-identified as men who had stopped having

56:47

sex with their wives and women whose husbands had stopped having

56:49

sex with them. And...

56:57

It's pretty rough. The first reason chosen by 68%

57:00

of the men was she isn't sexually adventurous enough for me.

57:03

This is the sort of lie back and think of

57:05

England kind of thing. You're a plank! That's

57:07

not great. The first reason chosen

57:09

by 66% of the women was he

57:11

lost interest and I don't know why. Another

57:16

finding from the survey is that within the top 5

57:18

reasons given by men for not being sexual and

57:20

for women thinking their spouse is... were no

57:22

longer sexual was anger. Anger is a

57:24

common aspect of sexless marriages. It

57:27

is often a wall that disqualifies conversation

57:30

and connection. So

57:34

that is... That

57:36

is really, really rough. And

57:41

I honestly, I didn't

57:43

really hear about this and I think

57:45

I had some callers some... some

57:49

time ago who were

57:51

talking about being in a

57:53

sexless marriage and I sort of had to... What

57:58

does this mean? So,

58:02

the accepted rate of sexist marriages is somewhere between 10

58:04

and 20% of marriages. Now,

58:12

that's a

58:15

false statistic. Let's do

58:18

our intelligence test. Why

58:22

is 10 to 20% a

58:25

false statistic for sexist marriages?

58:29

You just donated at FDR? Thank you so much.

58:32

Thank you, I appreciate that. Thank you, Adam, that's very

58:35

kind. Thank

58:37

you, Jeremy, for the donation. I appreciate that.

58:42

Are you eager to hear the sexist marriage stuff?

58:44

Well, the problem is you can't hear anything. There's

58:46

no creaking, no screaming, no, brace yourself. What's

58:48

that? They so-called Scottish foreblame, brace yourself. Somebody

58:52

says, I'm very interested in the sexist marriage topic.

58:54

I know two men, one thirties of the fifties,

58:56

who suffer from awful sexist marriages. I also know

58:58

a woman who says her husband of 20 plus

59:00

years is like a roommate. Ooh, chilly. This

59:03

story is breaking my heart, yeah, yeah. 80%

59:08

of sexless, I'm guessing. No, no, I don't think so. He

59:13

claims they are best friends, but she doesn't seem to

59:15

care about him being frustrated. 10

59:19

to 20% is false because grossly underreported, painful

59:21

to admit. Well,

59:23

no. I mean, I think there

59:25

is that aspect that some people won't ... and

59:28

also, if you have a largely

59:30

sexist marriage, and the question is, have you had sex

59:32

in the last month or three months, and

59:34

maybe you have sex twice a year, but

59:38

it just happens to have fallen in that timeframe, then you

59:40

would not be counted as a sexist marriage. Though, for me,

59:43

four times a year would be sexist, anything

59:45

less than four times a day. Day, I tell

59:47

you, like I'm not old. The

59:51

reason why it's false is that 10

59:53

to 20% is false is because if ... You're

1:00:00

in a sexless marriage, a lot of people will get divorced,

1:00:02

and that's not counted. Because they're counting

1:00:04

the sexless marriages that continue, not the

1:00:06

sexless marriages that have failed. Where

1:00:11

people have gotten divorced. Does that make sense?

1:00:16

Can women losing their looks also be a factor?

1:00:20

I don't think so. I don't

1:00:23

think so. I mean, yeah, we fade, we age out

1:00:25

a little bit, but if you stay in good shape,

1:00:27

you should... I mean,

1:00:29

look at Robert

1:00:31

F. Kennedy Jr., whatever crappy

1:00:33

liberal lunatic he is who wants

1:00:36

to jail people for questioning climate change. The

1:00:38

guy's pretty buff, and he's in his 70s, right? So

1:00:42

there's absolutely no reason you can't continue

1:00:44

to look good as you age. I

1:00:46

mean, as good as when

1:00:50

you were 20? Well, maybe

1:00:52

even better, right? If you start exercising

1:00:54

later on

1:00:56

his wife killed herself and he's on

1:00:58

steroids. Okay, I

1:01:00

don't know about that, but let's

1:01:03

say he is on steroids, he still looks good, right?

1:01:08

So yes, under reporting, and the fact is

1:01:11

that a lot of marriages that are sexless will

1:01:15

no longer be marriages, and they wouldn't

1:01:18

be counted as sexless marriages, although they were

1:01:20

sexless marriages, if that makes sense. So

1:01:27

that is a huge

1:01:30

challenge. So this is from the UK, and

1:01:33

if you've seen British teeth, this will make more sense.

1:01:38

A new survey, how new is this? So

1:01:40

2018, right? So it's six

1:01:42

years ago. And

1:01:45

killers include the

1:01:47

menopause and having young children, but for the

1:01:49

over 60s at least, not body confidence. So

1:01:52

a new survey by Grandsnett and Mumsnett, an

1:01:54

associate with relate, has revealed the ultimate

1:01:57

taboo, the truth about sex. and

1:02:00

the lack of it in relationships. Over

1:02:04

a quarter, 29% of

1:02:08

GrantsNet and MumsNet users currently in relationships

1:02:10

say that their relationship is sexless. According

1:02:15

to the official definition, no sex at all in

1:02:17

the past year or fewer than 10 times in

1:02:19

the past year. 20%

1:02:22

say they've had sex fewer than 10 times and 8% say

1:02:24

they've had no sex at all over the previous

1:02:26

12 months. Age

1:02:29

seems to play a strong part, with

1:02:31

the number of people saying they are in

1:02:34

sexless relationships growing steadily through the age

1:02:36

groups. Those who are in sexless relationships included 18% of those under

1:02:38

30, 25% of those in their 30s, 28% of those in their

1:02:40

40s, 36% of those in their 50s and 47% of those aged 60

1:02:42

or older. The

1:02:52

big leap in sexless relationships between those in

1:02:54

their 40s and those in their 60s might

1:02:56

be down to menopause, which happens

1:02:58

on average at 51 in the UK and

1:03:01

can be associated with the physical discomfort that makes

1:03:03

sex difficult. Almost

1:03:06

a third of those over 60 say

1:03:08

they have lost their libido since the menopause, and

1:03:10

those over 60 are significantly more likely than the

1:03:12

average to say they would like less sex, 11%.

1:03:17

3% of those over 60 say their partners would like less

1:03:20

sex. But

1:03:23

getting older has its benefits as body confidence

1:03:25

surges noticeably, over only 14% of

1:03:27

those 60 or older who are having less sex

1:03:30

than they or their partner would like said they were

1:03:32

self-conscious about their bodies compared with 37%

1:03:34

of under 30s. The

1:03:38

survey confirms something that lots of parents will

1:03:40

admit anecdotally, having young children is a passion

1:03:42

killer. Those with no children

1:03:44

are significantly less likely, 16%, than

1:03:47

those with at least one child, 30% to report they

1:03:49

have had sex less than 10 times in the past

1:03:51

year. So

1:03:55

we can

1:03:59

go on and on. But so this

1:04:01

is parents and over 50 so

1:04:03

it is going to be not

1:04:07

This is not representative of the

1:04:09

population as a whole but

1:04:12

I think people in general are having

1:04:15

less sex certainly for

1:04:17

young people they're having less sex because I

1:04:20

had a pornography or or Just

1:04:23

anxiety awkwardness Dating

1:04:25

apps the general 80% of

1:04:28

women going for 20% of the men and so on so

1:04:30

I think that there's a lot less sex in Modern

1:04:33

society there was sort of a big bulge so to

1:04:35

speak but um There was a big

1:04:37

bulge in the 60s and 70s in the 80s and

1:04:39

then with AIDS and so on it began to fade

1:04:41

out And then there was more

1:04:43

sex that happened after 9-11 because disasters

1:04:47

tend to spur sexual behavior. It's

1:04:49

a very hard selected stuff and I

1:04:52

think it's really really faded out as a

1:04:55

whole and I think people are

1:04:57

just not having as much sex I mean there's a small number

1:04:59

of guys who are having a lot of sex and Most

1:05:02

most women of reasonable levels of attractiveness can have as

1:05:04

much sex as they want, but they're

1:05:06

not really really going for it. So

1:05:08

I think it's

1:05:10

uh It's pretty wretched

1:05:15

It's pretty wretched And

1:05:18

a crin disruptors both control bad food,

1:05:20

etc. Yeah, I get that stress for

1:05:23

sure But

1:05:28

Do you know this? Study

1:05:30

I'm you know, I'm gonna double check on this I

1:05:32

you know, I hate getting things wrong with a deep

1:05:34

passion, but I also like to be spontaneous So

1:05:37

let me just make sure I get this, right? This

1:05:41

is the data about

1:05:44

women who come into money And

1:05:46

men who come into money. I don't know if you've

1:05:49

ever heard this data So

1:05:51

women who come into money Where

1:05:55

and men who come into money so they

1:05:57

did a survey on

1:06:04

people who win the lottery. So

1:06:10

a new study from Sweden, how new

1:06:12

is this? Let me just check the date here.

1:06:15

Everybody says new, there's no date. All

1:06:18

right. A new study from Sweden has revealed

1:06:20

that married women who win the lottery are far more

1:06:22

likely to divorce their spouses than men who win the

1:06:24

lottery. The

1:06:27

study entitled, Fortunate Families, the Effects of

1:06:29

Wealth on Marriage and Fertility, analyzed

1:06:32

the short-term effects of large positive wealth acquisitions

1:06:34

on marriage and fertility in Swedish lottery players.

1:06:37

Researchers found that married women who win the lottery

1:06:40

are almost twice as likely as married men to

1:06:42

file for a divorce in the aftermath of a

1:06:44

win compared to male lottery winners.

1:06:48

Quote, when the winning player is a married

1:06:50

woman, our estimate suggests that a 1 million

1:06:53

Swedish krona, windfall

1:06:55

almost doubles the baseline short-term, short-run

1:06:58

divorce rate. The

1:07:01

study made a point of noting that winning the lottery as

1:07:03

a woman doesn't cause more divorces, it simply accelerates them for

1:07:05

women who are already thinking about filing for divorce. Men

1:07:09

who win the lottery actually lead to higher

1:07:12

marriage rates and a reduced divorced risk. Quote,

1:07:15

suggesting wealth increases men's attractiveness as

1:07:17

prospective and current partners. Unm

1:07:35

stay for the money. Not

1:07:37

only are male winners much more likely to get

1:07:39

or stay married, they also end up having more

1:07:41

children. This trend was consistent regardless of whether the

1:07:43

man was married or not. The

1:07:47

study confirmed previous empirical studies that showed husbands

1:07:49

with higher incomes or employment stabilizes marriages while

1:07:51

the wife's income and employment increase has the

1:07:53

opposite effect. So

1:07:57

fertility issues, the wealthier women

1:07:59

get. the less children they

1:08:01

want. The wealthier

1:08:03

men get, the more children they want.

1:08:08

Giving men money increases

1:08:10

the marriage and birth rates. Giving women

1:08:13

money decreases the marriage and birth rates.

1:08:15

It's not that complicated. It's

1:08:17

really, really not that complicated.

1:08:23

When you give women free money, they

1:08:26

have fewer children. When you

1:08:28

give men free money, they have more

1:08:30

children. When you give women free money, they get

1:08:32

divorced more. When you give

1:08:34

men free money, they get married more.

1:08:37

And remember, the welfare state, the national

1:08:39

debt, money printing is mostly designed to

1:08:41

take money from men and

1:08:44

give money to women. The

1:08:46

entire aim of democracy, when women vote,

1:08:49

is to take money from men and give it to

1:08:51

women. And that kills marriage rates. And

1:08:53

that kills birth rates. Now,

1:08:59

why is that? Yes, sir. Go ahead. So

1:09:03

kind of on the sexless marriage thing,

1:09:06

what is not for me, but it's

1:09:09

for a friend, per se. So he's

1:09:11

getting married in August, and he already

1:09:13

knows that he's going to have to

1:09:15

be a, quote unquote, passport bro, because

1:09:17

his wife was, where's fiance, current fiance?

1:09:20

Is going to withhold section

1:09:22

of him and put him in timeout. Long

1:09:25

story short, I guess

1:09:28

my question is, if you were

1:09:30

in my shoes trying to counsel

1:09:33

him away from this marriage,

1:09:36

would you even try or what would you do?

1:09:38

Because I see him stepping onto a landmine.

1:09:41

But it's not a marriage. Yeah,

1:09:43

it's not a marriage. A marriage is founded

1:09:45

and cemented on sexuality, because that's

1:09:47

what marriage is for, is to manage and control

1:09:50

sexuality and the products of sexuality, which is children.

1:09:53

So a sexless marriage is a contradiction

1:09:55

in terms. Again, I'm

1:09:57

going to just preface this by saying. If

1:10:00

the woman is going through some horrible illness and you

1:10:03

know that obviously there's times and so on, right? There's

1:10:05

going to be times of more or less, right? And

1:10:09

when you have a bunch of little kids all

1:10:11

over the place, if you're homeschooling, you know, there's

1:10:13

going to be times where there's less. So

1:10:16

I get all of that, right? But

1:10:18

we're just talking in general. There's no such

1:10:21

thing as a sexless marriage. That's

1:10:23

a complete contradiction in terms. It's

1:10:27

like saying a costly income. An

1:10:30

honest politician like these things don't, a short answer

1:10:32

from me, right? These things just don't exist. There's

1:10:36

no such thing as a sexist marriage. You can call it a marriage

1:10:38

if you want, but it's

1:10:40

not a marriage because a marriage is founded

1:10:42

upon the management and control of sexuality. The

1:10:44

reason we have marriage is because of sexuality,

1:10:47

the daphmorphic nature of our reproduction. And

1:10:49

so that is why we have

1:10:52

marriage is because of sexuality. So a sexist marriage

1:10:55

is not a marriage. And so

1:10:57

he can say that he's getting married,

1:11:00

but he's not. And

1:11:02

a sexist marriage is

1:11:06

not cemented, right? Sexuality

1:11:08

is, it's, pair bonding is sexuality. I

1:11:11

mean, of course there's love and respect,

1:11:13

but you can have love and respect

1:11:15

without sexuality. But

1:11:17

for human beings, pair bonding

1:11:20

is sexuality. And

1:11:22

so you can't be pair bonded without sexuality

1:11:25

because pair bonding is evolved to manage

1:11:29

and retain the

1:11:31

connection of partners who are having children because you need

1:11:34

both people to raise the children to be fully committed.

1:11:37

So there is no marriage without

1:11:40

sexuality. Now sexuality

1:11:42

alone doesn't make a marriage, but

1:11:45

it's necessary, but not sufficient.

1:11:47

I mean, there's a good marriage, which is, you know,

1:11:50

virtue, respect, love, and so on. So

1:11:53

I would say, and particularly here's the funny

1:11:55

thing too, right? This is the funny thing too, right?

1:11:57

So as a whole. really

1:12:00

going to go here, right? So as

1:12:02

a whole, women like successful men,

1:12:04

right? They really, really like successful

1:12:06

men. Successful men tend to have

1:12:08

a lot of high testosterone. I don't want to make this

1:12:10

causal because for men, success

1:12:16

gives you more testosterone and more testosterone gives

1:12:18

you more success. It's a virtuous cycle, right?

1:12:21

So women want tough,

1:12:23

aggressive, successful men and

1:12:27

that means a high sex drive, right?

1:12:30

So if, for instance, for the ladies, if you

1:12:32

want a successful man, he's going to have a

1:12:34

high sex drive and

1:12:37

the more successful a man

1:12:39

you want, the higher sex drive he's

1:12:41

going to have. And if you

1:12:43

don't, if you don't give him sex, it's

1:12:46

going to be really tough for him to stay successful because

1:12:51

what for, right? What for?

1:12:54

So it's funny

1:12:56

just that women

1:13:00

want all the positive

1:13:02

economic attributes of high,

1:13:06

high status, high success, high T men, and

1:13:09

that comes along with a high sex drive. And

1:13:13

I just think that's the deal. Like

1:13:17

wanting a man to be

1:13:19

successful without accepting that

1:13:21

gives him a higher than normal sex drive is

1:13:24

like a guy wanting a woman

1:13:26

to be really attractive, but for

1:13:28

no one else to notice that

1:13:30

she's attractive, right? Never. I mean, it's

1:13:32

just it's not a possibility. So,

1:13:38

and of course, I've talked about

1:13:41

this before that it's

1:13:45

important for men to

1:13:48

keep women happy and it's important for women to

1:13:50

keep men happy. And

1:13:52

men do things to keep women happy and women need

1:13:54

to do things to keep men happy. That's

1:13:57

the deal you make when you say you become one

1:14:00

flesh, that you work very hard to

1:14:02

keep each other happy. And it shouldn't

1:14:04

be work because the other person's happiness

1:14:06

should be your happiness. You

1:14:10

know, my, my daughter got interested in a

1:14:12

show recently and we watched it through twice.

1:14:14

I don't really like the show, but,

1:14:17

uh, we, because it gave her a great

1:14:19

happiness and she loves telling me about the

1:14:21

law. She's really into the law, the history

1:14:24

of these various things, video games, have this

1:14:26

law and so on. And she's so

1:14:28

delighted to tell me. That

1:14:30

it brings me happiness to

1:14:33

hear what she's talking about, though I could care less

1:14:35

about video game lore. I

1:14:37

just like shooting demons or something like that.

1:14:39

So, but it should be, you

1:14:42

know, when my wife is a

1:14:44

vegetarian, she's lactose intolerant, and so it's tough for

1:14:47

her to get a good meal. So when we

1:14:49

find a place where she can get a good

1:14:51

meal out, I'm thrilled

1:14:53

to go there. And you know, half of

1:14:55

our family is debating to make each other happy.

1:14:57

Where are we going to eat? Right? I like a good

1:14:59

steak, but I don't want my wife to just have to

1:15:01

order French fries and a salad. Right. And,

1:15:04

and so I, you know, whereas

1:15:06

my wife wants to enjoy a meal, but she

1:15:08

also knows that I enjoy a good steak. So

1:15:10

we're all just trying to be very nice and

1:15:12

sometimes it's a bit paralyzing, but you focus on

1:15:14

the other person's happiness because their happiness is your

1:15:16

happiness. And

1:15:22

what I've understood about male

1:15:24

and female sexuality is

1:15:26

that men want

1:15:29

to have sex often more

1:15:32

than women, but women enjoy sex as

1:15:34

much as men. And

1:15:36

that does mean that the man is going to have to

1:15:38

initiate sometimes more. So you just

1:15:41

deal with that. I mean, that's, that's the

1:15:44

way that men have what, like 15 times or 17

1:15:47

times the testosterone levels of women. And

1:15:49

it's not the only factor, but yeah, as a

1:15:51

man, you're going to have to initiate more. That

1:15:54

doesn't mean you're unattractive. It just means that

1:15:57

men and women are different. You

1:15:59

don't want you to. to be a man if

1:16:01

you're straight. And women,

1:16:03

you don't want your husband to be a woman

1:16:06

if you're straight. And that means you're going to

1:16:08

have to accept some differences and there's some benefits

1:16:10

and there's some minuses. Men

1:16:13

tend to be more decisive, more direct and tend

1:16:15

not to overthink things and don't get us clogged

1:16:17

up by social disapproval. And that's

1:16:20

a strength. It's also a weakness. And

1:16:22

women tend to be more

1:16:25

concerned with other people's opinions and they

1:16:27

tend to be more concerned

1:16:29

with the beauty of the interior

1:16:32

and exterior of the living space and

1:16:34

so on. And that is a strength

1:16:37

and a weakness. And men and women are

1:16:39

designed to fit together and work together in

1:16:44

a beautiful and complementary fashion. So

1:16:49

if a man, if you take it personally that you

1:16:51

have to initiate sex more, you're

1:16:53

missing the whole point. If you didn't

1:16:55

have to initiate sex

1:16:57

more, you'd be married to a dude. So

1:17:02

I don't like that. It just seems to me, I want

1:17:06

a lovely feminine woman with as high a sex

1:17:08

drive as I have. Well, that's

1:17:11

not usually really the

1:17:13

thing. That's not really

1:17:15

the case. So wanting

1:17:18

to have a partner

1:17:21

who has all the strengths that you have and

1:17:23

none of the weaknesses you have is

1:17:26

wanting someone who's not the opposite sex

1:17:28

or not. So I

1:17:30

don't know if this makes any sense, but no, I

1:17:33

would say to my friend, no,

1:17:35

you are going to set yourself up

1:17:37

for a life of frustration and

1:17:41

torment and pornography addictions and

1:17:44

fantasizing and potential affairs and

1:17:46

just a mess. Just

1:17:49

a mess. And

1:17:52

that's, I'm sorry, last thing I say, like I remember going

1:17:54

on a date once with a woman

1:17:56

who announced at the beginning that she just didn't have really

1:17:58

much of a sex drive. enjoyed it on occasion.

1:18:00

And I was like, yeah, okay, you know, I have

1:18:02

no issue with that. I mean, that's, but it's not

1:18:05

for me, right? I couldn't live

1:18:07

like that in a million years. So

1:18:09

you know, shook hands and

1:18:12

wish her well, but you know, she's going

1:18:14

to need to find some low testosterone guy

1:18:16

and then she's going to be upset because

1:18:18

he's not successful and can't fight for what's

1:18:20

his due in this holly burly, rough and

1:18:23

tumble world. So, but yeah,

1:18:25

I just, I wouldn't, I wouldn't date, uh, uh,

1:18:27

I wouldn't get involved in a relationship or

1:18:29

a marriage where the woman had a

1:18:31

low sex drive. I mean, that would just be, uh,

1:18:34

it would just be torture. I mean, that would be

1:18:36

for me, that would be like, you

1:18:39

know, some, some women, I'm, it's true of

1:18:41

some men too, but I'm talking as a man, some women

1:18:43

are very sedentary, right? They don't like to go

1:18:45

anywhere. They don't like to do anything. They don't like to, and

1:18:48

it doesn't mean that they're overweight or anything, but they just don't

1:18:50

like to move. And you know, of course

1:18:52

I met my wife playing volleyball and then first

1:18:54

weekend, uh, we went away together.

1:18:57

We, we, um, went to

1:18:59

dirt biking and fantastic

1:19:01

stuff. Like I'm an active

1:19:03

kind of guy. This is why, you know, these shows

1:19:05

are kind of nice. If I'm doing them, I can

1:19:07

actually walk around rather than just sit

1:19:10

in front of a camera. I'm just, I'm a moving kind

1:19:12

of guy. When I, when I,

1:19:14

when I sit, I feel like I'm slowly

1:19:16

being gazed at by Medusa and Tony DeStone. So

1:19:19

you just need, you know, the fact that

1:19:22

my wife is, I'm going to call her action

1:19:24

wife from the very beginning because she's very adventurous

1:19:26

and does a wild, she's gone

1:19:28

zip lining over crocodiles. She's, you

1:19:30

know, she's really adventurous. So we go

1:19:32

dune bugging. We went dune bugging once,

1:19:35

and just, you know, really, she's, she's up for

1:19:38

just about anything and she's very adventurous and she

1:19:40

likes to move. So that's compatible, right?

1:19:42

And so if

1:19:44

he's marrying a woman with,

1:19:49

with a low sex drive, or was

1:19:51

it, is it no sex drive? Is it like, what's the story there?

1:19:53

Yeah. I mean, long story short, Sue's hitting the jackpot

1:19:57

on the on

1:20:00

him, he's a blue-blooded Haitian. She's

1:20:03

Dominican from lower economic

1:20:05

class. I

1:20:08

knew them both in college. Long

1:20:11

story short, after college, they separated

1:20:14

and he got back with their end of 2023 and

1:20:17

proposed in January of 24. I

1:20:23

was just like, dude,

1:20:26

trust and believe if she went and got

1:20:28

her masters in

1:20:30

the Northeast and you were in the Southeast, trust

1:20:33

and believe that she fooled around.

1:20:37

Sorry, but why did he propose to her? After

1:20:42

trying to fleshing it out from him,

1:20:44

he says that if

1:20:46

he knows that he's married and that he has a

1:20:49

kid on the way, he's going to work a lot

1:20:51

harder. Because

1:20:54

he's going to go get an

1:20:56

MBA, he wants to

1:20:58

get this CFA and become

1:21:01

president of a bank. He

1:21:03

says having a woman or having a

1:21:05

kid and being married just

1:21:07

puts more pressure. It

1:21:11

took me a few months to get that out of him. Is

1:21:14

she classy? Classy?

1:21:17

No, I would. I

1:21:19

mean, to be, I'd

1:21:22

call her an adjustable five. No,

1:21:25

I don't just mean in terms of looks. I

1:21:27

mean, does she understand how the wealth of wealth

1:21:29

and status works? Can she talk to other wives

1:21:33

of CXOs? Does she have

1:21:35

sophistication in the realm of

1:21:38

art and finance and the world? Is she

1:21:40

classy? It doesn't necessarily mean which, I mean,

1:21:42

I didn't grow up rich, but I'm classy.

1:21:46

Is she going to be a wife who can socialize and

1:21:53

move easily among wealthy

1:21:56

people? So,

1:21:58

I mean, from the time that I spent for- around her

1:22:00

about three years. She's,

1:22:05

she's really abrasive. Okay.

1:22:07

So she's not going to be an asset to him

1:22:09

and she's going to limit his career because

1:22:12

a man, a man at the highest circles is going

1:22:14

to be judged by his partner. Yeah.

1:22:20

Um, the, I

1:22:22

brought that every, every single investor

1:22:24

that I've ever had wants

1:22:27

to socialize with me and my partner.

1:22:29

Oh, I guess my wife now. Right. And

1:22:32

because they want to know what your judgment is like,

1:22:34

they want to know what your self-esteem is like. They

1:22:36

want to know what your, um, sensitivity

1:22:41

to status is like. They

1:22:44

want to know that you make good decisions. Now,

1:22:47

especially if you're starting out and he sounds like he's

1:22:49

starting out, they're going to say, okay,

1:22:51

so you're going to have to, we're going to have

1:22:53

to figure out whether you make good decisions before we

1:22:56

give you a million dollars to start a business or

1:22:58

before we hire you and put you in charge of

1:23:00

a $10 million budget, right? Like

1:23:02

when I was in the software field, I had

1:23:04

a multimillion dollar budget that I had to manage

1:23:07

and people want to know, do you make good decisions?

1:23:09

And especially when you're starting out,

1:23:12

they want to look at your partner and say, well,

1:23:14

here's an example of a decision you've made. This is

1:23:17

the person you chose to marry. And if you've made

1:23:19

a bad decision with that, if that's not a decision

1:23:21

that people can really respect and look up to, they

1:23:23

won't hire you. They won't give you the money. They just won't.

1:23:30

Yeah, that makes sense. And something that

1:23:32

I put towards

1:23:34

him that was huge,

1:23:36

especially for this potential

1:23:39

kids is that he's

1:23:42

politically conservative and

1:23:44

she's politically liberal.

1:23:46

And I don't mean liberal, like fiscally

1:23:49

conservative and socially liberal. I mean, she's

1:23:51

like, I mean, standoffal

1:23:53

politics. She's just with the current thing. Okay.

1:23:57

So, but can she be reasonable? one

1:24:00

grows up with bad information. The Lord knows I did.

1:24:03

So, but can she be reasoned with? I

1:24:07

mean, he, in that area, he

1:24:09

just taps out of the conversation. They just,

1:24:11

so she can't be reasoned with. Exactly.

1:24:14

Okay. So how are

1:24:16

they going to resolve disputes? How are they

1:24:18

going to resolve disagreements? If

1:24:20

she can't be reasoned with. That's

1:24:24

what I told him. And where I'm called is he

1:24:26

wants me to travel to his wedding in August

1:24:29

across the country. And I'm like, why

1:24:32

do I, or

1:24:35

why should I put

1:24:37

my time into something that I do not support

1:24:42

that I've spoken against? Um,

1:24:44

but I want to do it because he's my good friend. So

1:24:47

that's where I'm kind of just like, I'm stuck. All

1:24:50

right. And has he done the research on,

1:24:52

and how best to raise biracial kids? No,

1:24:57

he hasn't. So, I mean, he doesn't

1:24:59

care about this stuff. What the

1:25:01

hell is he looking for? Okay.

1:25:03

Well, I mean, he's, they're both, you could

1:25:06

just say black. He's Haitian and she's Dominican.

1:25:08

Oh, sorry. I thought you said blue-eyed. My

1:25:11

mistake. Sorry. I, I, I, blue blood, blue

1:25:13

blood. So he's

1:25:15

Haitian and she's Dominican. Okay. So still

1:25:17

biracial, but right. Okay. So, I mean,

1:25:20

which culture and, and which identity are

1:25:22

they going to be slightly gravitate towards

1:25:24

and, and all of that, right?

1:25:26

The biracial kids have some, some challenges, right? I'm

1:25:28

sure they can be overcome, but it's really important

1:25:30

to be aware of them. Okay.

1:25:34

So he wants to be a top level person,

1:25:36

but he's got a fairly low, he's going to

1:25:38

marry a fairly low rent wife

1:25:41

and she has, and they can't

1:25:43

resolve disputes based on reason and evidence.

1:25:46

So, right. And

1:25:48

now are they Christians? Yeah,

1:25:52

they're both Christians. Okay. So is she willing to

1:25:54

let him take the lead in the marriage and

1:25:56

to submit to him? So

1:26:00

I haven't gotten that far with him yet, but I

1:26:02

just told him I was like, as a

1:26:04

friend, you need to set the tone like

1:26:07

early on if you go through with this. How

1:26:10

do you, sorry, how do you set the tone after you get

1:26:12

married? I don't understand. That's like saying

1:26:14

you really need to be careful about which car you

1:26:16

buy after you buy the car. Well,

1:26:19

as I know, we were talking before he got

1:26:21

engaged before he proposed. And did he listen? Hell

1:26:24

no. He didn't listen to me

1:26:26

or his father. And I was like... Oh,

1:26:29

so his father is saying don't marry the woman. Yeah,

1:26:32

exactly. I mean, I told,

1:26:34

this is my friend, I said, hey,

1:26:36

look, I found a private investigation firm

1:26:38

for you in her

1:26:40

metro area because you live a

1:26:42

thousand miles away. And

1:26:45

if you come from, he comes from pretty

1:26:47

good money. Like what's

1:26:49

going on in Haiti with the crisis in

1:26:51

the military, like he's not even, it doesn't

1:26:55

affect whatsoever. He's

1:26:57

insulated. It'd be like in

1:27:00

an American sense, it'd be like part of the

1:27:02

politically elite or I guess in Canada,

1:27:05

maybe being part of like a Trudeau

1:27:07

extension. Somewhere kind of

1:27:09

bulletproof. Yeah. I

1:27:11

mean, maybe literally he has to be right. Right. Yeah.

1:27:15

So it's like she's

1:27:17

marrying up. He

1:27:20

has all this ambition, all these

1:27:22

things that he wants to do. And

1:27:24

all she brings to the table is, I

1:27:27

like... And

1:27:29

I'm like, it's so... Sorry, all she brings to the

1:27:31

table is what? I didn't... Is that

1:27:33

he likes her? To me, it's just frustrating

1:27:36

to see... But what does he like? Is

1:27:38

she super pretty? Is she super sexy? I bet that

1:27:40

doesn't really matter if she doesn't want to have sex,

1:27:42

right? Yeah, and that's

1:27:45

the thing. I genuinely had no

1:27:47

clue. I

1:27:49

feel as if there was something in

1:27:51

his childhood that he

1:27:53

hasn't overcome because I told

1:27:55

him, I'm like, there's nothing. And then

1:27:58

I said it polite. I don't see... why

1:28:01

someone of your stature would go for

1:28:03

someone at that level, not

1:28:06

just that class, but just

1:28:08

her demeanor. Sorry.

1:28:11

Has she already indicated that she

1:28:14

will prefer a low or no-sex

1:28:16

marriage? Well,

1:28:19

me and him talked about it in depth

1:28:21

and she was like, my

1:28:24

fiance is already mentally, she

1:28:26

stressed out, she's feeling this type of way

1:28:28

because of a crisis in my home country

1:28:31

and I'm there now. I

1:28:33

already know that once

1:28:36

I have kids, I'm going to have to

1:28:38

travel because I can't cheat on my spouse in the

1:28:40

states because I'll

1:28:43

be exposed pretty easily. So

1:28:45

it's like he's going in knowing that he has

1:28:47

to have an affair, consistently

1:28:49

out of the country. So

1:28:53

isn't she just going to take half his money? That's

1:28:58

what I'm trying. Well, I gave up on

1:29:00

time for them, but I'm like, do

1:29:02

I still go to his marriage, his

1:29:04

ceremony? Well,

1:29:07

are you

1:29:09

Christian? I

1:29:12

was raised Christian, but I wouldn't

1:29:15

claim the

1:29:17

identity so much. I would just say I

1:29:20

was raised Christian in that colors.

1:29:23

You cut, you cut, you cut. Thou

1:29:25

shalt not bear false witness, I assume is

1:29:27

fairly important, right? Yes,

1:29:29

of course. Okay. So can

1:29:32

you honestly celebrate this wedding

1:29:35

or are you going to be lying through your teeth? I

1:29:39

will be lying through my teeth. So when

1:29:42

they say, does anybody know of any reason

1:29:44

why this marriage is not a good

1:29:46

idea, are you going to lie? Oh,

1:29:50

man. You

1:29:53

sounded like the ghoul there from Fallout.

1:29:56

I didn't see that. Oh, it's a great actor.

1:30:00

Are you gonna are you gonna lie at

1:30:02

a wedding. I

1:30:05

was going to. You

1:30:08

know it's funny i thought about that i was

1:30:10

going to keep my mouth shut just

1:30:12

to make him happy as a friend.

1:30:15

Because i've already set my peace to him plenty

1:30:18

of times yes but

1:30:20

if you go you're there to celebrate.

1:30:24

Okay right. Yeah

1:30:28

you're not there to give a speech which says.

1:30:32

I'm betting against the marriage continuing and i sure wish i

1:30:34

got 10% of what she's going to pull out of his

1:30:36

ass with her lawyers because it's going to be a lot

1:30:38

of fucking money. Yeah

1:30:41

you're not going to be doing that right. No

1:30:44

matter wrong okay so you're going to be

1:30:46

going up there and you can be given

1:30:48

a little speech there. No.

1:30:52

Yeah are you going to be

1:30:54

giving a speech my brother are you going to be

1:30:56

giving a speech. No i'm not

1:30:59

i know i won't give a speech

1:31:01

i won't do it close then wouldn't want you to

1:31:03

give a speech if you close. I

1:31:10

so since i've known both them. Three

1:31:12

years and school it's been a quite

1:31:16

some time now it's like

1:31:18

i've told him. Even

1:31:20

when he first met the girl started dating

1:31:22

her how i felt

1:31:24

about her. I'm

1:31:28

so i kind of feel as if i'm beating

1:31:30

a dead horse. So why does

1:31:32

he want you there if he knows you don't

1:31:35

approve of the marriage in fact you strongly disapprove of

1:31:37

the marriage from what i can see. Because

1:31:41

so he's from blue blood and

1:31:43

i'm from say red blood

1:31:46

pretty much like lower economic classes and

1:31:48

what i've done with my life and how i've turned it

1:31:51

around reminds him of his father and what he did. Okay

1:31:53

i just carded into solid rock. Now

1:32:00

does your friend have his own money or is it

1:32:02

largely family money? Largely

1:32:05

family money. So why doesn't his father cut him

1:32:07

off if he does it goes against his, he's

1:32:10

going to lose the money, right? Um,

1:32:15

that's yeah. Cause his

1:32:17

dad isn't bankrolling the marriage either. He's

1:32:19

paying for it out of pocket. No,

1:32:21

no. But what I mean is why doesn't he cut him out of

1:32:23

the, say you marry this woman. You're out of the will. You want

1:32:26

to go against my advice? No problem,

1:32:28

but you got to make it on your own. If

1:32:30

you don't respect me enough to take

1:32:32

my advice, then surely you wouldn't want my money.

1:32:37

So that I don't know all of the

1:32:39

intimate details with that. Um,

1:32:42

I just, it bothers me when, when

1:32:44

fathers don't actually show

1:32:47

any real authority, it just bothers me. You

1:32:50

know, it's like if the kid is

1:32:52

like, Hey, you know, I'm, I'm, uh, um, is

1:32:54

his father, does his father have credibility in the

1:32:57

realm of marriage? Oh,

1:33:00

I mean, I don't know his dad, but

1:33:03

they've been married. You only, only one marriage

1:33:05

partner, two kids. So, okay. So he's, he's

1:33:07

got some, some, uh,

1:33:10

he's got some reason to be respected when it comes

1:33:12

to marriage. So if his son is,

1:33:14

is going to engage in a bad marriage where

1:33:16

he's already planning to have affairs. I

1:33:18

mean, if I were the dad, my

1:33:20

son was doing this, I would try and talk myself son

1:33:22

out of it. I'd give all the reasons why. And

1:33:26

if my son decided to go ahead. Then

1:33:28

I would say, okay, then if

1:33:30

you don't respect my advice, if

1:33:33

you don't respect me as a moral person, if

1:33:36

you don't respect my ethics and my arguments, then

1:33:39

any money that I've made out of my ethics

1:33:41

and my arguments, you wouldn't want because you wouldn't

1:33:43

want the bad fruit of

1:33:45

a bad tree. So I will, I

1:33:47

will liberate you from the will. So you

1:33:50

don't end up touching any of the assets

1:33:53

that I've gathered through. Being a

1:33:55

good person, uh, because you don't think I'm

1:33:57

that good a person and therefore you wouldn't want any

1:33:59

of the fruit. of that, so I'll

1:34:01

liberate you from any responsibility regarding inheritance.

1:34:06

Man. But

1:34:10

that's authority, isn't it? Yeah.

1:34:13

Yeah, you can't help

1:34:15

but respect that, either. Well, I mean, respect or not,

1:34:17

that would be the fact. I

1:34:23

mean, if you want to go your own way,

1:34:26

go your own way. That means don't take

1:34:29

my money. You

1:34:34

know, like if some

1:34:37

son said to his father, I think you're a

1:34:39

shitty dishonest businessman, but I really want you to

1:34:41

invest in my startup, what would the father say?

1:34:49

That part one more time, I was just looking at the chat.

1:34:51

My bad. If a son were

1:34:54

to say to his father, I think you're

1:34:56

a bad and dishonest businessman, and I want

1:34:58

you to invest in my startup, what would

1:35:00

the father say? Oh,

1:35:02

he said get lost. Yeah. If you don't think I'm

1:35:04

a good person, then

1:35:08

why would you want my dirty money? And

1:35:12

if you won't take my advice as

1:35:15

a happily married man, and you're already planning,

1:35:17

this isn't the subjective thing, you're already planning

1:35:20

on having affairs before

1:35:22

you even get married and you're Christian. So

1:35:27

you're already planning on how to have affairs. That's

1:35:30

a terrible situation. And so if

1:35:33

I'm telling you don't marry this girl, then if you're

1:35:35

right, and it's going to be a great marriage, then the

1:35:37

reason I would tell you not to is because I don't

1:35:39

want you to be happy. I'm

1:35:42

a bad father. I'm a bad person. I

1:35:45

just want to sabotage you. It's like, okay. So if

1:35:47

I'm a bad father and a bad person, you clearly

1:35:49

wouldn't want any of my money. Mm-hmm.

1:35:58

And maybe that would cause some problems. and

1:36:00

some estrangement. Maybe

1:36:03

it would stop the marriage, maybe it wouldn't, I don't know.

1:36:07

But there will come a time when your friend is going to

1:36:09

wake up, as all people

1:36:11

do, from bad decisions. And if you go on

1:36:13

into a marriage, planning on how you're

1:36:15

going to have an affair, and

1:36:18

how you're going to hide it, and

1:36:21

where you have to go in order to hide it, and

1:36:23

that's your approach to a marriage, then

1:36:26

you're a terrible Christian, and you're a terrible

1:36:28

family man, and you're going to get taken

1:36:30

to the cleaners. And

1:36:33

a woman who's willing to marry a man who's

1:36:35

already planning on having affairs, to

1:36:39

me would be a predatory gold-digger. Like,

1:36:42

why else would you marry a man who's already planning on cheating

1:36:45

on you? I

1:36:49

don't know these people, obviously I can't tell for sure, but

1:36:51

that would be my first thought. Yeah,

1:36:55

and something to add to

1:36:58

your point about red flags, or

1:37:00

my point about red flags, I

1:37:03

had told them, I was like, yeah, I mean, I'm guessing you

1:37:05

guys are going to, you know, have joint accounts and everything, joint

1:37:07

bank accounts, the

1:37:11

house will be in both your names and whatnot. And

1:37:14

my friend was like, no, she actually wants

1:37:16

to have her own, we

1:37:19

both have our own finances. Separate.

1:37:24

Really? I

1:37:26

mean, she's bringing much money to the table? Sorry,

1:37:29

I don't quite understand. Six figures,

1:37:31

six figures. Okay. And

1:37:41

so, and that's the red flag. I mean, yeah,

1:37:43

I don't understand this. I've heard of these married

1:37:45

couples. It's gross to me that these married couples

1:37:47

were like, well, I have my bank account, and

1:37:49

he has his bank account, and I write my

1:37:51

check for half of this, and

1:37:53

I do my laundry, but not his. And what

1:37:56

if you make your side of the bed

1:37:58

but not hers? That's just so unbelievably petty.

1:38:00

and ridiculous. I don't understand

1:38:02

separate finances. He's supposed to be one flesh.

1:38:04

He's supposed to

1:38:06

be one person. I don't have separate bank

1:38:08

accounts for my left and right hand. So,

1:38:15

you know, I don't know whether you should go

1:38:18

or not, but I wouldn't

1:38:20

go to a holy place. And whether

1:38:23

you're Christian or not, it's holy to

1:38:25

them, right? I wouldn't go to a

1:38:27

holy place and bear false witness.

1:38:30

I don't think there's any amount of money in the

1:38:32

world that would make me go to a holy place

1:38:34

and bear false witness. Oh,

1:38:38

God, like that. So, yeah,

1:38:40

I'll call them and I'll tell them. I'll just say, hey, I

1:38:42

can't honestly

1:38:45

celebrate your decision.

1:38:47

I feel

1:38:50

as if that's going to really tarnish our

1:38:52

friendship. But if it does, it means

1:38:54

we're more friends to begin with. Well, okay, you

1:38:56

can look at it that way for sure. I'm

1:38:58

not disagreeing with you, but I think a

1:39:01

more important thing is, do you

1:39:03

want to be friends with someone whose marriage is

1:39:05

going to descend into hell in fairly short order?

1:39:07

Because he's going to be calling you up and

1:39:09

he's going to be miserable and he's going to

1:39:11

be frustrated and then he's going to get divorced

1:39:13

and he's going to have lawyers go after him

1:39:15

and he's just going to be a wreck. And

1:39:19

he's going to be that way because he didn't

1:39:21

listen to you or his father. Right?

1:39:24

So do you want that amount

1:39:27

of suffering? And

1:39:30

if he's got kids, the kids are going to

1:39:32

be involved and maybe she's going to make allegations

1:39:34

against him. It's so coffin the case in divorce.

1:39:36

And like, do you want to

1:39:39

spend the next five years of

1:39:41

your life propping up a friend's

1:39:43

disasters that could have easily been prevented if he

1:39:45

just listened to you and or his father? Because

1:39:48

he's not going to be the same guy. Now, maybe,

1:39:50

maybe he won't get divorced. Maybe he'll just be going

1:39:52

to have affairs. Now you say, hey, man, how's it

1:39:54

going? And he's like, yeah, you know, I just went

1:39:56

to this place and I had sex with this person.

1:39:59

Like. Or he's

1:40:01

gonna say you know marriage is bad because

1:40:03

you know she won't touch me or you

1:40:05

know like I got an STD Or I

1:40:07

got some woman pregnant in in Manila or

1:40:09

like I don't know whatever right in

1:40:12

Laos So do you want this

1:40:14

CD mess in? your

1:40:17

life No,

1:40:20

I definitely don't Yeah,

1:40:25

I mean it's where I I

1:40:28

mean you pretty much helped me figure out the

1:40:30

answer. It's just like Tell

1:40:32

him be honest with him where I

1:40:34

stand I'll just put

1:40:36

it out there the way that I feel is that I

1:40:38

feel It's

1:40:41

like I'm going to take a punch in the gut because

1:40:43

I told him I'll

1:40:45

be there to support you And

1:40:49

I already gave him my word So

1:40:52

that's where going back on my work. It is

1:40:54

like So you what

1:40:56

do you mean? What do you mean when you say

1:40:58

support you'd be there to support him? What does that

1:41:00

mean? Just

1:41:03

another body and another face in the

1:41:05

audience No, I understand

1:41:07

you'll I understand what being there means you'll be

1:41:09

there I get that you'll be a face in

1:41:12

the audience the question was support what a support

1:41:14

him me You don't support him

1:41:16

you don't support this decision It

1:41:20

just means so One

1:41:22

way the way that I see it is This

1:41:27

I mean a case in point would be like was just saying

1:41:30

How'd your daughter likes a video game Lauren? You

1:41:32

don't necessarily this is a terrible, you know

1:41:34

comparison it really is but go for it

1:41:36

man, yeah, terrible comparison just

1:41:38

but it's like how Your

1:41:41

daughter likes a video game Lauren, you don't

1:41:43

particularly care for it But because that's your

1:41:45

daughter you love her You want

1:41:48

to encourage her all that stuff you go ahead

1:41:50

and you support her and you take part I

1:41:53

don't view him as a child at

1:41:55

all. I view him as a Brother,

1:41:57

you know, we're a few thousand

1:41:59

miles miles away from each other, but we've

1:42:03

had some authentic, honest conversations over the

1:42:05

years. Some pretty

1:42:08

deep heartfelt ones. And what

1:42:11

I mean by support is just

1:42:13

like, all right,

1:42:16

I don't understand

1:42:19

necessarily why you're taking

1:42:21

this action while you're

1:42:23

doing this, but

1:42:27

because we have

1:42:30

good credit together, I

1:42:32

want to go ahead and give you the

1:42:34

benefit of the doubt and

1:42:37

just go so therefore we don't have any bad

1:42:40

blood towards each other. Okay,

1:42:44

that all sounds very Sicilian. I want

1:42:48

bad vows, right? I want bad vows. All right. So

1:42:51

they're Christians, right? And

1:42:56

what are they going to

1:42:59

say to each other? Are

1:43:03

they going to say before God Himself?

1:43:05

Now, whether you believe or not,

1:43:07

they believe, right? Right?

1:43:13

So they are going to go

1:43:15

in front of Almighty God and

1:43:20

say, forsaking

1:43:23

all others, aren't they? Yes,

1:43:28

they are. And

1:43:30

is your

1:43:34

friend going to be

1:43:38

bearing false witness in these

1:43:40

most holy and sacred vows before

1:43:43

Almighty God? Is he going

1:43:45

to lie through his teeth because

1:43:47

he has no plans of forsaking

1:43:50

all others? In fact, he's planning to

1:43:53

forsake her for others. He

1:43:58

is going to have to lie through his teeth

1:44:01

to God himself on the

1:44:03

most holy day in his

1:44:05

life. You

1:44:09

think you can trust this man? He'll

1:44:12

lie to God, you don't think he'll lie to you? It's

1:44:18

a good point. That

1:44:24

is a good point. Oh

1:44:27

man, I'll lie to Almighty God but I got

1:44:29

your back bro. Also,

1:44:32

and this is a good point, somebody

1:44:35

saying also, he's

1:44:37

going to tell you about the cheating and then you're going

1:44:39

to hang out with his wife. And

1:44:43

you're going to have to keep his secrets. Will

1:44:53

you have this woman as your lawfully wedded

1:44:55

wife to live together after God's ordinance in

1:44:57

the holy estate of matrimony? Will you love

1:44:59

her, comfort her, honor and keep her in

1:45:01

sickness and in health for richer and for

1:45:03

poorer? For saking all

1:45:05

others and keep yourself only to her

1:45:07

for as long as you both

1:45:10

shall live. I

1:45:13

do! And

1:45:16

the lightning bolt blows his testicles through

1:45:18

the stained glass. And

1:45:24

you know it's a lie and you're

1:45:26

there cheering, breaking

1:45:29

bread, drinking your glass. You

1:45:31

know it's a lie. I

1:45:38

couldn't man. I don't know what you should do, I

1:45:40

don't know. I'm just telling you that

1:45:42

there's going to be a price to pay, there's

1:45:45

going to be a price to be paid. I

1:45:48

don't know what that price is going to be but

1:45:51

it's going to have to be paid. By

1:45:53

you. Yeah,

1:46:01

that's true. I mean, that's why I haven't bought a ticket. I

1:46:03

haven't got a hotel. None

1:46:07

of that because it's like, wait, I

1:46:10

don't support this. I don't agree with this.

1:46:12

Sure. I called a friend about it. I

1:46:14

was like, dude, are you

1:46:16

going? He's like, no. I

1:46:21

asked him why and he was like, well, I wasn't invited.

1:46:24

That's it, right? I just wasn't invited. Yeah.

1:46:27

I hate it when you don't get that invitation

1:46:29

to hell, man. That's tough. Satanists

1:46:32

is like, you're not invited. Like, oh man, I

1:46:34

can't go. Anyway, sorry. Go

1:46:36

ahead. Yeah, no,

1:46:38

I mean, it's just like,

1:46:41

I mean, I don't

1:46:45

know. I mean, you

1:46:49

bring up a good point. I

1:46:52

mean, you pretty much

1:46:54

helped me see the answer that I need

1:46:56

to the decision that I need to make.

1:46:59

But I guess the only

1:47:02

not even a but it's

1:47:04

just, I have to be honest

1:47:06

with them. And if I'm being honest

1:47:08

with you about friend

1:47:12

of mine, I mean, he does

1:47:14

have his flaky ways, but

1:47:17

I've tended to overlook, which is

1:47:19

not following through on his own word,

1:47:22

his own commitments. I used

1:47:24

to, long story short,

1:47:27

like a little business group, you'd have

1:47:29

accountability meetings every week about

1:47:34

the things that you had done, call

1:47:36

them leading indicators, and you're

1:47:38

lagging results. Yeah. And

1:47:41

I always had to whip him up like,

1:47:43

dude, what

1:47:46

is stopping you? Like, what is going on?

1:47:49

Like, these are your promises.

1:47:51

These are your goals. These are your commitments.

1:47:53

This does not have any impact on me.

1:47:55

You're coming to a group with me, some

1:47:57

of my friends. I got, you know. people

1:48:00

that I know, you're just

1:48:02

one of a selected few.

1:48:06

What the hell is going on? How come I

1:48:08

can't get you to be here on time? You

1:48:11

always sound defeated. Dude,

1:48:16

figure it out. So

1:48:19

it was always a lot of redirection

1:48:21

and motivation with them. And

1:48:24

it's like, man, I can't. Okay, if

1:48:26

you're late, just to

1:48:29

me, it's just like, hey, just shut up, fall

1:48:31

in line, say your part and

1:48:33

leave. Don't come in and make a scene. Hey

1:48:35

guys, I'm so tired and a lot

1:48:38

going on. Nobody cares.

1:48:41

I don't care. We're

1:48:43

here for a 10 minute meeting on a Monday

1:48:45

morning at 6 AM. Everyone

1:48:48

has a busy life. We got

1:48:50

10 minutes. We don't need to hear

1:48:52

you lament for three of those minutes.

1:48:55

Right. So

1:48:58

yeah, he has that trait to

1:49:00

him that's very irritating. Yeah, and

1:49:02

it could be that his father's really, I'm sure his

1:49:04

father is extraordinary. And then there's a regression to the

1:49:06

mean where he's more average. So maybe he's in over

1:49:08

his depth and he's got, you know, this is quite

1:49:11

common in families, right? They call this RACs, the richest

1:49:13

RACs in three generations, right? So maybe it could be

1:49:15

that. And he's going to say, he's going

1:49:17

to, you know what he's going to say? Oh, I know what he's

1:49:19

going to say. You say maybe if you say I'm not coming, what

1:49:21

is he going to say? You promised.

1:49:25

Right. He's not going

1:49:28

to say that. He's just going to say

1:49:30

what he would probably say is,

1:49:32

you know, I get it. I understand. And

1:49:34

we probably just part ways. That's

1:49:36

what I would assume. Oh, so he wouldn't

1:49:38

even try and understand or even further. Yeah,

1:49:41

because if he said if he did say you promised

1:49:43

or you gave me your commitment, you'd be like, well,

1:49:46

but I didn't give a commitment to forsake

1:49:48

all others in front of God and

1:49:50

you're going to give that commitment knowing you're going to break

1:49:53

it. So I really don't think we should talk about broken

1:49:55

commitments as a whole. But if he's not going to

1:49:57

even say that, yeah, you have to be able

1:49:59

to disagree with friends and you still be friends. Otherwise

1:50:01

the friendship is just based on conformity and

1:50:04

that's not real, it's not

1:50:06

honest, it's not genuine. All friends disagree and that's

1:50:08

helpful. I mean if you're doing something wrong, you

1:50:10

desperately need people to disagree with you. So

1:50:14

yeah, I'm sorry to succumb to this, but

1:50:16

you know, you're probably saving yourself a lot

1:50:18

of suffering by not getting involved in this

1:50:20

marriage. I can't

1:50:22

stand being around bad marriages. Like I had many,

1:50:24

many, many, many years ago I had a friend

1:50:27

who was things were just getting

1:50:29

worse and worse with his wife over time and

1:50:32

I just had to bail. Like I would give them some

1:50:34

advice and I'm not too terrible at that, I'd give them

1:50:36

some advice. They just wouldn't listen and they just, and

1:50:39

I just like, they ended up getting divorced years

1:50:42

after I stopped and I just couldn't,

1:50:44

I just couldn't. And

1:50:47

it's just being around bad marriages is

1:50:50

just, it's toxic for the soul. It's just, it's

1:50:52

horrible. It's a little, it's a

1:50:54

big window in the hell. I

1:50:56

don't want to do it. Yeah,

1:51:01

that makes sense. I appreciate it. You're

1:51:04

welcome. Listen, great, great topic to bring up

1:51:06

and I sympathize. I really do. You

1:51:08

know, it's tough when friends

1:51:10

that we have prior to big life decisions

1:51:12

start making bad big life decisions. That is

1:51:14

a tough situation to be in and I

1:51:16

really do sympathize with that. And sometimes it's

1:51:18

a, it's just a bandaid off

1:51:20

situation that can help that way. All

1:51:22

right. Well yeah, drop me a line, please let me know. Let

1:51:25

me know how it goes. I really would appreciate that. Okay.

1:51:28

I think I'll close it off tonight. How,

1:51:31

how are you guys, if you'd want to just, you

1:51:33

know, either give me a brief thing, audio or just

1:51:35

type, how was it for you having one of these

1:51:39

kinds of shows? I like

1:51:41

it in some ways. I think there's some

1:51:43

cool stuff about being able to just bring

1:51:46

up topics, drop topics. And that was

1:51:48

interesting to me, but of

1:51:50

course you are the donors. You

1:51:52

are in charge. I am your

1:51:55

willing, well-greased philosophy slave and

1:52:00

How did you find it as a whole? You liked

1:52:02

it? It's very good. I think it's

1:52:04

interesting, yeah. I think it's interesting. And when

1:52:06

people are more chatty sometimes, nice

1:52:08

to see real time convo. Yeah, I like that too.

1:52:10

And it's a great topic to bring up, and I

1:52:12

really do sympathize and appreciate

1:52:14

the conversation. So yeah, maybe we can

1:52:16

do this once a week instead of me always having to be

1:52:18

in the studio. That would be kind of nice. And

1:52:21

it does give me a chance to sort of grab things and

1:52:23

read them and get topics going off

1:52:26

that way. And we've got

1:52:28

a nice variety

1:52:30

of topics. So yeah, good to

1:52:32

hear. Maybe we'll do this on Friday

1:52:34

nights, see how people think. And we'll also

1:52:36

get people's feedback if you're listening to this

1:52:38