0:02

This is a HeadGum Podcast. Welcome

0:29

to Girls on Porn, I'm Laura,

0:31

I'm Rachel, and we love porn.

0:33

This is our Porn Review Podcast.

0:36

We talk about what we love and

0:38

roast what we hate. Helping you find hot,

0:40

ethical, just plain better porn for your spank

0:42

gang. And we're looking

0:44

at everything. Before

0:52

we introduce the topic, we have a steamy little

0:54

segment for you today. 69

0:57

Seconds of Sex News. We've

1:01

pulled headlines from the news to keep you

1:03

informed and horny. Here we go. Tech

1:08

mogul and anti-aging obsessive Brian Johnson

1:10

is at it again. In the

1:12

past, he announced that he gets

1:14

injected with his son's blood to

1:16

stay young. Now, he's getting

1:18

shockwave therapy in an attempt to do the

1:20

same. The most shocking part of this new

1:23

revelation is where he's getting the treatment. You

1:26

guessed it, folks, he's shocking his

1:28

penis in the hopes of getting

1:30

erections like that of 18-year-olds. Personally,

1:32

I'm only familiar with dick shocking in a safe

1:35

consenting, very advanced BDSM setting.

1:37

But listen, one man's pleasure is

1:39

another man's medicine. Grindr

1:42

couldn't let Spotify have all the fun. The

1:44

gay hookup app has released their own end

1:46

of the year report called Grindr Wrapped. According

1:48

to the report, more than 100 billion messages

1:50

were sent on Grindr in 2023. It

1:53

found various patterns, for example, that

1:56

Trinidad and Tobago topped the self-identified

1:58

top charts, whereas South Korea boasted

2:00

the most self-identified bottom. Also, the countries

2:02

where users most often sought trans partners

2:04

were the US, the UK, and India.

2:07

Grindr also surveyed its users, who named Barbie the

2:09

movie of the year and Beyonce's mother of the

2:11

year. Can't wait to see what else gets wrapped

2:14

thanks to Grindr this year. Can't believe I didn't

2:16

make mother of the year. Oh, it

2:18

feels better without one. Ugh, crowd,

2:21

listen up. A new male contraceptive

2:23

pill has begun its first trial.

2:26

This pill, unlike many other contraceptives,

2:28

doesn't involve any hormones. Instead, it

2:31

prevents the sperm production process' access

2:33

to vitamin A, which stops the

2:35

seminiferous tubules and the testes from

2:38

making sperm. If this pill ever hits the

2:40

market, it could be an unprecedented moment, as

2:42

it might be the first time males don't

2:44

get access to something before everyone else. Only

2:48

fans' model, Daria Osterpank, has been detained

2:50

in Poland in connection to her suspected

2:52

collaboration with Belarus' dictator, Alexander Lukashenko. Osterpank

2:55

is alleged to have worked with Lukashenko

2:57

for as long as seven years, all

2:59

the while using her only fans' career

3:02

as a cover. Some of

3:04

her potential crimes include posing as a

3:06

pro-democracy activist and leaking information to

3:08

the KGB. Listen up, Eon Productions. All you

3:10

have to do is announce the next bond,

3:13

and you've got your film right here. And

3:15

that leads us to today's topic, NPC.

3:22

Really quickly, I would be so

3:24

happy just to touch on something

3:26

briefly in sex news. I would

3:28

be so happy to never hear

3:30

about Brian Johnson ever again. I

3:32

find him to be so repulsive.

3:36

I feel that way about so many billionaires

3:38

in the fucking news. I'm like, I could

3:40

be fine knowing they don't exist, but he's

3:42

actually so a hair's breath away from being

3:45

a bond villain. You know what I mean?

3:47

He's just using all of his

3:49

money to live longer, literally doctor

3:53

eviling. It's the same as going

3:55

to space and decimating the environment

3:58

and spending millions of dollars. that

4:00

could like feed nations. Literally. And

4:02

he's hideous. It's a level of

4:04

ego that is disgusting and horrifying

4:07

and we're obviously going

4:09

to pay attention to it because we're like criticizing it

4:11

but I'm like don't even, don't give that person

4:15

press and then we did. But

4:17

like, yeah, but listen, fuck

4:19

that guy. I know. I couldn't

4:21

stop thinking about Silicon Valley too. Like the

4:24

sort of combo like Bezos Elon Musk

4:26

character is so spot on. It's so

4:28

absurd that I can't believe that it's

4:30

real. Yeah. You know what

4:32

I mean? Yeah. Like he's shocking his penis

4:34

to have erections like an 18 year old. Who are you fucking? You

4:37

know, like, yeah, who's fucking him? It's not

4:39

even like about that. Like he could be,

4:41

it's about him like wanting to feel like

4:43

he has the best boner. Like it doesn't

4:45

matter what the person he's fucking feels about

4:47

it. It's that he needs to know

4:49

in his, his little P brain that

4:51

scientifically I have the best boner. Yeah.

4:55

And he lives for that ego gratification and I

4:57

guarantee for that reason he's terrible in bed. Yeah.

5:01

I know that he is. I love to just every once in

5:03

a while, like I'll, I'll troll his Instagram and just like comment

5:05

and be like, what are you going to do about your speech

5:07

impediment? Really

5:09

interesting that you're sending all this time and

5:12

money on your boner, but why not fix

5:14

the speech impediment you have? Which and listen,

5:16

nothing wrong with a speech impediment, but we

5:18

know that drives that guy. Like you're, you're

5:20

aiming for the thing that it's like what

5:22

you should be doing is like small penis

5:25

humiliation, like nonconsentingly because this guy clearly gives

5:27

a fuck and it's like the best way

5:29

to get under his skin. You know, like

5:31

in our PC world, we have to sometimes

5:33

remember that like the best insults are the

5:36

ones that like really get to

5:38

the core of what will hurt that person.

5:40

And we're talking about a bond villain. So

5:42

I'm going to allow it. Feel

5:45

free to write in and defend Brian Johnson

5:47

to us. But so NBC, NBC. No,

5:50

I'm clear character. I

5:55

do think it's a funny thing to start like hating

5:58

a sort of billionaire tech guru and then talk about

6:00

video games. There's some kind of Venn diagram of

6:02

audience there. But yeah, so MPC is

6:04

like the characters of the video games that

6:06

aren't other players. Toad in Mario

6:09

Kart, you know, and her like Super

6:11

Mario. Like he's just like sitting around

6:13

waiting for you, you know. Wait that's

6:15

where you went first? Yeah. Mario Kart?

6:18

I meant Super Mario. But Toad he

6:20

just like delivers news, you know what

6:22

I mean? Like he doesn't do anything.

6:24

He's just literally like a foot soldier.

6:26

Or for example, it's like the

6:29

strippers in Grand Theft Auto. Yeah.

6:31

The butler and Tomb Raider. It's

6:34

like all these characters you come

6:36

across. Gamer girl alert. You know

6:38

what I thought of the butler

6:40

is like I never actually played

6:43

Tomb Raider but a friend had it and

6:45

there's like a section of the game you

6:47

can play where you just go

6:49

around her house and you train and you

6:51

kind of learn to play the game. Like

6:53

you can have her like lift weights and

6:56

like jump in her pool and it was

6:58

like very comprehensive and I was kind of

7:00

fascinated with how deep the game went. So

7:02

I made and the butler follows you around

7:04

the house and it's really annoying and he's

7:06

like maybe it's lemonade. Yeah. And I had

7:08

him follow me into her walk-in fridge and

7:10

then I closed the door on the butler and I kept

7:12

him in the fridge. Yeah. Like I

7:14

always found it really enjoyable to find

7:16

like loopholes in the game

7:19

like or not loopholes but like the game

7:21

is well designed enough that

7:23

I can like do something totally pointless

7:25

but creative. Right. Right. Right. I love

7:27

that kind of thing. I think that

7:29

yeah and there's obviously it's become very

7:32

big this last

7:35

year on TikTok and things like that. A

7:37

lot of people like pretending to be

7:41

NPC. Yeah. On TikTok on streaming. So

7:43

like the big explosion, the big viral

7:45

moment was I think centered around Pinky

7:48

doll being like ice cream so good.

7:50

Like yeah like doing this very gang.

7:52

Yeah. Yes. Gang which are both we

7:54

should note like original phrases like those

7:57

are her sort of like trademarked. Right.

8:00

but this like incredibly choreographed like performative. I'm

8:03

fascinated by it. I also did a

8:05

play, Laura Croft is heavy in this

8:07

episode, but I did a play where

8:09

I played a video game character.

8:11

I wasn't an NPC. I was like one

8:14

of the characters being controlled by a guy playing

8:17

video games while his wife yelled at him. So

8:20

the joke of it was that I kept walking

8:22

into walls where he got distracted, but it was

8:24

really fun to embody the NPC or like the

8:26

game, the sort of the game movement. Like that's

8:29

always like a really fun. Yeah. And

8:32

we'll talk about it later in like the videos.

8:34

But yeah, I mean, it takes a lot. I

8:37

mean, it's performance, you know, it is a performance

8:39

art. And you know, you could

8:41

pay for them to like, do

8:43

things and have their little sayings

8:45

and dance or whatever. Yeah. And

8:48

they can make a lot of money. Yeah,

8:50

there's a big economy just on social, like,

8:52

and it's hard to know exactly how

8:54

big the economy in the porn space

8:57

correlates, like how much only

8:59

fans creators are making. I expect there's a

9:01

big potential there that there could be a

9:04

lot because we know from prior episodes that

9:06

some of the best ranking performers on many

9:08

vids are the ones who do like

9:10

League of Legends, fanfic

9:12

slash cosplay. So

9:14

I'm guessing that like some of like a

9:17

really great NPC creator could do really well

9:19

in that space. But we haven't quite seen

9:21

that blow up yet. What's interesting to me,

9:23

and I don't know if you thought about

9:25

this, but like, I was like, this is

9:27

also something that like porn sort

9:30

of did first, like this is

9:32

like basically what cam girls have

9:34

been doing. You know,

9:36

I mean, not acting as if

9:38

not acting like NPC characters, but

9:41

they've been doing things where like you if

9:44

you tip them, they'll do something, you know?

9:46

Yeah. Well, the nature of like a live

9:48

stream has been like existed

9:50

in the porn space for years before

9:52

being on Twitch live with the thing.

9:54

Yeah. And I think it just like

9:57

burst through into the sort of mainstream

9:59

social space. Right. Because it was

10:01

kind of a combination of all those things. But it

10:03

was also this really interesting cultural moment

10:05

of like us all kind of like this

10:08

is so weird, but we're all like, people

10:10

are paying for this like people are

10:13

paying to just like, make this person

10:15

like say something it was interesting, like

10:17

distillation of that culture into right, a

10:19

viral moment that is making lots of

10:21

money for performers like Pinky doll. And I'm

10:24

really curious to see how it tracks like

10:26

I'm like I wonder what the trajectory of Pinky

10:29

doll's career is like, does that person

10:31

have decades ahead of them of

10:33

doing some version of this and I like, I didn't

10:35

know much about her and like went to her tech talk

10:37

and was like looking around and I see that she's doing like

10:39

muckbang kind of stuff like I imagine like,

10:42

she's a hustler and will kind of evolve in her

10:44

career. But I'm like, yeah, how long does

10:47

one just do NPC live stuff until like

10:49

the trend and make that work? Like when

10:51

does that money train come into

10:53

the station and then stay

10:55

there? You fucked that metaphor, but it's

10:57

fine. There's this one guy who like doesn't

11:00

know the streets of Soho. Oh, really

11:02

like in New York? Yeah. And he's like bald and

11:04

like sort of like fashiony. I can't remember. I don't

11:06

remember like what his like handle is or like who

11:08

he is. But he's everyone's

11:11

always like posting videos is like walking around

11:13

in New York and like seeing him but

11:15

yeah, he's always like on Broadway and like

11:17

Prince or something. Wow. In the

11:19

middle of the day, like streaming is

11:21

that you see that's another label layer

11:23

of like strange like it's a strange

11:25

thing to see. Hey, everybody with just like

11:27

cameras in their faces, but right like

11:29

pretending to be video game, non

11:32

player characters in

11:35

public spaces, to an

11:37

extent that it's like unavoidable, like it was

11:39

just like, occasionally people do this and you

11:41

see it online, but like persistently seeing that

11:44

as a pretty fascinating thing to consider. But

11:46

it's like if you break it down of

11:48

like what it is, especially on TikTok and

11:50

streaming. I mean, it's very similar to like sex

11:52

work. You know, yeah, it's

11:55

performance and labor. Yeah. With

11:57

like very clear transactional elements.

12:01

I give you money, you do this thing.

12:03

Yeah. The other thing is like

12:06

this, I think we can get into the

12:08

kinkiness of it, but it's a very obvious

12:10

like, of course, if you're playing video games

12:12

and there's a stripper, right? You want to

12:15

fuck her, you know, like this is such

12:17

an obvious like one to one teenage boner

12:19

kink. You know what I mean? Totally.

12:21

And not to say that like it's only for teenagers, but

12:24

like formative years, like

12:26

formative sexual years, playing

12:28

video games and being like, how

12:30

do I like I wish I could just

12:32

bend that character over and like the way

12:34

that video game characters are these sort of

12:37

unrealistic bodies and like, perfect

12:39

sort of imagery and mid dress. If you

12:41

can do any kind of fantasy in that

12:43

game, why wouldn't that come to mind? You

12:45

know, so it's a pretty obvious like, yeah.

12:48

So I think that's part of why it blew

12:50

up is it's like there is a kind of

12:52

gratification, even in the social space. We're like, I'm

12:54

not necessarily fucking this performer, but I

12:57

am telling her to eat ice cream and

12:59

she's beautiful and like and also control. That's

13:01

enough. Yeah, yeah. Like there's a

13:03

country. Yeah, it's for you. Yeah, it's for you.

13:05

Yeah. So I think that that's

13:07

that's what's exciting about it. Yeah. Uh,

13:11

NPC also grew by 1541% in

13:14

23 three is

13:17

a search term. Okay. On Pornhub.

13:19

That's the highest that the most

13:21

popular NPC searches were NPC sex,

13:24

game NPC and hentai NPC. I

13:27

also was like

13:30

trying to like do some other research on

13:32

this. And of course, anytime I

13:34

research anything like some sort of like covenant

13:36

eyes or your brain on porn or like

13:39

some anti porn. Yeah. It's

13:41

ruining us. It's killing our teens. Yeah. And basically

13:43

it was like, you know, this is your brain

13:45

on porn and like, this guy's like personal

13:47

like vendetta against porn was like the last

13:49

thing I want to say. And it says

13:52

like an all bold porn is a beta

13:54

male thing. It makes you the NPC that

13:56

watches and hears others have fun in their

13:59

lives. Okay. And

14:03

he also, I know, I was like,

14:05

the arguments are always fascinating. Like only

14:07

beta men. I don't think so. I'm

14:10

like human beings are turned on by

14:12

sexuality. Like yeah, it was like porn

14:14

makes you an NPC. Yeah. That's

14:17

like saying like watching a TV show or

14:19

like a movie makes you an NPC. Yeah.

14:21

You know what I thought? Yeah. You

14:24

know what I thought? Like your beta, if

14:26

you watch a movie, it's like, oh no.

14:28

It just means like, you know, you're suggesting

14:30

yourself to being entertained. Like yeah, it's entertainment.

14:32

It's fantasy. You're just watching.

14:34

It's been around for years. It's

14:36

been around for centuries, ages, you

14:38

know? Yeah. Yeah. You know

14:40

what I thought you were going to say before is like porn already

14:43

does the NPC thing and you talked about camming and like live shows.

14:45

But I thought you were going to talk about

14:47

like mopes or like guys in porn who don't

14:50

get to participate. Like the sort of non player.

14:52

I immediately went into the porn and was like,

14:54

who's the non player character? And I was like,

14:56

Oh, sure. Is it the guy, the gang bang

14:58

who doesn't get a go? Like who is that?

15:01

Yeah. I mean, there are.

15:03

Yeah. I'm kind of stretching. I just

15:05

was like trying to follow your logic thread, you know?

15:07

No, I meant like more. And then you went

15:09

a different direction. More like cam girls are. Yeah.

15:11

That form and be an NPC. Yeah.

15:14

Yeah. I mean, it just in terms of like how

15:16

they do. Yeah. Yeah. And

15:18

that's true of so many like YouTube trends, like so many things in the internet were

15:20

like formed through trends in

15:22

porn. And then they were like, Oh,

15:24

like we see on

15:26

YouTube. Like, you know, like that kind of thing.

15:29

See that emerge as a result. There was also

15:31

this article that I found kind of interesting where

15:33

it was like, are you a sexual NPC? Meaning

15:36

that like you might be going

15:38

into like sexual situations, like

15:41

sticking to a sexual script because like you've never

15:44

been sort of informed or

15:46

like, you know, you never been curious or done any

15:48

exploration to figure out like what it is that you like. So

15:51

you might just like go into like a sexual

15:54

encounter. Like, like,

15:56

I don't know what non-persistent kind of. Yeah.

16:00

know what I like and like sex

16:02

I feel sort of like automatic and you act in a

16:04

way that you think that you should. So

16:06

there's people who act like those and then there's

16:09

also people who treat their partner like a sexual

16:11

NPC. So like these people

16:13

that just don't listen to their partner and

16:16

think that they know better. And instead

16:18

of like, you know, I'm telling you

16:20

what I like this person's like, no, no, no, we're

16:23

gonna do this. I mean, that person

16:25

sounds like they suck. Yeah, you should be a fucking

16:27

up person. But it has to

16:29

be like it had some interesting sort

16:31

of helps like, you know, like tips

16:33

and tricks is the words that I'm looking for helpful

16:36

tips and tricks of like, what

16:38

to do in order to like communicate like

16:40

what you like and what you're into. Yeah.

16:43

And there is actually this little

16:45

questionnaire that I had never heard of

16:47

before. That's called the Q tip. The

16:50

questionnaire for turn on initiation preference.

16:53

So it's like to figure out like what your sexual

16:55

initiation style is. There's been a

16:57

lot of discussion in the like,

16:59

the sex space online about sexual

17:01

initiation styles like responsive desire versus

17:03

spontaneous desire. It seems like every

17:05

content creator who's like a coach

17:07

like I am or like a

17:10

sex therapist or an educator is like,

17:12

you might have spontaneous like it's, it's kind

17:14

of like, it's buzzy right now. It's almost

17:17

like we sort of wore out attachment styles. And

17:19

we're now like, right now we're talking about moving

17:21

it into Yeah, initiation styles. Yeah. But

17:23

I think it's good. Because now there's

17:26

still so many people that

17:28

I know that I'm like, I mean, that's

17:30

just because I'm so comfortable talking about sex.

17:32

But like, sometimes people are like, I

17:34

don't know, I just like, I like, I like

17:36

sex. And I'm like, what do you like about it? You

17:39

know, like, yeah, I just like it.

17:41

It's great. I do good sex. It's normal.

17:43

Like, everyone's like, I just watch the normal

17:45

stuff. I do the normal stuff. Like, I'm

17:47

regular. Yeah. It's like the panic response. I'm

17:49

like, relax. It's not like a pass fail.

17:51

You know, I just think it's important to

17:53

know. But yeah, I do think it's good

17:55

that that stuff is being talked about online

17:57

because like, as much as like a time is

18:00

a little bit beaten to death and we're

18:02

like, I'm an anxious and it's like, careful,

18:04

this is all very nuanced and all we're

18:06

really doing is offering methodologies and language to

18:10

create definitions so that you can

18:12

understand your inclinations

18:15

and therefore express them to navigate

18:17

them, you know, as opposed to checking an

18:19

astrological box of like, I'm this type

18:21

of person and that means the only way I ever get turned

18:23

on, it's like, nope, usually people are kind of on a spectrum,

18:28

like everything is spectral essentially,

18:30

but yeah, it's been interesting to

18:32

watch the trends around that and

18:35

I'm curious to see how it's

18:37

paying off for like, more individuals.

18:39

Yeah. Totally. Yeah. Should

18:42

we do a showdown? Should we go down? Much so down. A

18:51

librarian with beautiful hair gets fucked

18:53

hard. NPC fucking girls at work.

18:55

Episode four, NPC

18:58

fucking girls at

19:00

work and it's a librarian.

19:03

Do you work at the library? I have no idea.

19:08

The story there, I just got lost

19:10

in it. The non-playable character is like,

19:12

fucking the girls at work. Yeah. Interesting

19:15

that they chose librarian. Like, does that career

19:17

still exist? It

19:19

barely does and God

19:22

bless them, you know? God bless

19:24

librarians. At one point, that was

19:26

like, you know, for a woman like me, a single woman,

19:28

that was my only hope was a career. That

19:31

was the threat. Like, that was the fear

19:33

and now I'm like, being a librarian sounds

19:35

awesome, but also like, I don't actually think

19:37

I'd be great at it. Librarians were never

19:40

married women. Yeah. They

19:42

were always, they had their cats and their glasses

19:45

and their non-existent sex lives.

19:48

Therefore, it's an interesting

19:50

trope in porn to be like, oh, I'm fucking

19:52

the librarian. Like, she takes

19:54

her glasses off and she's thinking. Yeah, but

19:56

actually, if anything, like, a librarian would like,

19:59

most likely be. be like, you know, you

20:01

take them home and they're gonna be a

20:03

femdom. You know what I mean? Like they're

20:05

just 100% agree. They're the secret slot. Like

20:07

they read all the books stepping on your

20:10

fucking balls. You know what I mean? Yeah,

20:12

exactly. She's shushing you and putting you in

20:14

a chastity cage. Yeah. Yeah.

20:16

Yeah. That title just generally confused me in

20:18

terms of who was like the

20:20

NPC is fucking and then we're in a library

20:22

with your coworkers. Like what it was like trying

20:25

to combine too many tropes of porn. Like

20:27

it was like, fuck your coworker who's

20:29

a librarian and an NPC. We've got

20:31

all the buzzwords and

20:33

then the video turns out to be like none of those things. Right. Okay.

20:36

Here we go. Teen slut meets

20:38

guy who tipped her on her

20:40

NPC TikTok live. Her tight cunt

20:42

gets stuffed. Wow. She just

20:44

walked the door. Yeah. On the other hand,

20:46

this one's like very clear contact. He tipped

20:48

and then just showed up. Yeah. Yeah. Like,

20:52

but like, I like to think that

20:54

she invited him over like, Oh, you

20:56

got my attention with the tip. And

20:58

that started the conversation. Like you too

21:01

can fuck an NPC TikTok live person

21:03

is the underlying message there. Okay.

21:06

Among us, imposter crept up

21:08

unnoticed and fucked hard me, Molly

21:10

Red Bull and fucked hard

21:12

me. Fuck hard me.

21:14

Fucked hard by imposter. Among

21:17

us is my

21:19

nephew, like like, oh yeah. Like

21:22

he has like a, like a stuffed animal. Yeah.

21:25

He's like, can you give me my hand? He calls it

21:27

like his manga manga. Oh,

21:30

can you hear me? My manga? That's

21:32

cute. Like that's cute. And also disturbing

21:34

to have come up in this

21:36

content. I can see why that's just

21:38

immediately where my mind weird. Anyway, I don't know

21:40

much about that game. I just don't. It's very big.

21:42

Yeah. Right now. This

21:44

one's pretty clear. We touched on it

21:47

earlier. NPC comes to life as a

21:49

free you sex toy. Classic. That's that

21:51

just sounds spot on. Like I'm like,

21:53

you're doing it. You nailed the genre. Like

21:55

way to go. Exactly. And PC

21:57

sex legend. Oh. Okay.

22:00

Yeah, that's that's

22:02

just straightforward Sex like

22:04

that is I like to think that I'm a sex

22:07

legend. Yeah, you know,

22:10

I think you're a sex icon Yeah, definitely.

22:12

Yeah, thanks. Definitely. No one's had a

22:14

bad time. No one's had a bad time

22:19

Great reviews great feedback across

22:22

the board. Yeah Okay

22:25

next one for me. Mm-hmm I

22:28

want to fuck all the NPC characters in

22:30

this RPG because they only say the same

22:32

lines part 2.0 Interesting.

22:35

So at first I thought this title was about

22:37

the acronyms. I was like, we love our acronyms

22:40

We love non playing character in this role playing

22:42

game, right? But then it went misogynistic

22:44

Maybe like why they only say the same

22:47

lines is that like what control element is

22:49

that about? Yeah, I mean, right Like

22:51

I just want to fuck them because they want to hear them

22:53

all say like it's this way, you know

22:57

It's this way. I Love

23:00

that princess, you know, that's the kinky fuck

23:02

lighter. You came up like but follow me.

23:04

Yeah It's

23:06

this way Okay,

23:09

last one from me NPC

23:11

sex a world where you

23:13

can fuck without resistance to

23:17

Tight tight. Yeah The

23:20

last one I have is the first video that will

23:22

review after the break. I figure it's fun

23:25

to read. Why not? VR conk

23:27

hot busy brunette Vanessa moon playing

23:29

NPC and new free guy sex

23:31

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27:19

so this is VRCon's hot Bussy

27:21

Burnett Vanessa Moon playing if you see

27:24

a new Free Guy Sex parody. Yeah,

27:26

a lot of interesting things they threw

27:28

in the title there. Yes, so it

27:31

makes gentle reference to Free Guy,

27:33

the movie starring Ryan Reynolds and

27:35

Jodie Comer. Weird detail, but when

27:37

I was in a pilot incubator I

27:40

was in a talk with the writer of

27:42

Free Guy, like talked about, like that was

27:44

like about to come out years

27:46

ago when we met him and he talked

27:48

about his writing style and how structurally and

27:52

formulaically sounds like a bad word but like

27:54

he writes with a very like strong story

27:56

math element. So

27:58

it doesn't really play into this porn, but it's It is funny

28:00

to do a parody of like a movie that you have some

28:02

insight on the making of it. Right,

28:04

sure. Sure. Random.

28:07

The world is a chaotic place. Like, why not? Mm-hmm.

28:10

So, couple things that are odd

28:12

choices here. Right. I mean,

28:14

first we start with like the guys were getting

28:17

a POV. Mm-hmm. And

28:19

he's in his bed looking

28:21

down at his body and then his friend calls

28:23

and is like... Yeah, he's laying... Like, who lays

28:25

on the bed like this? You know?

28:27

Yeah. He's not laying like

28:29

head on the pillow. He's laying like across the bed.

28:31

Yeah. Head to the side. You

28:34

know? Yeah, and the camera is like where

28:36

his head would be. So, we're like looking down at ourselves. Yes.

28:39

We're in VR. Yeah. Yes.

28:41

Yes. That's important to say. This is

28:44

a VR video, which is part of why it's so strange

28:46

because the angles are always weird if you're not watching it

28:48

that way. And I always feel like the content is kind

28:50

of broad strokes in VR. Yes. Because

28:52

the shots are so much more important. Yeah.

28:55

In the production process, I'm sure. So,

28:57

he gets a worried, like an intervention phone

28:59

call basically from a friend who's like, hey

29:02

man, you've got to stop playing Free City.

29:04

Like... It's ruining your life.

29:06

Your life is falling apart essentially. And

29:08

we get kind of a shrug gesture

29:10

from this decapitated body. Yeah, and he

29:12

just like tosses his phone aside. He's

29:14

like, tosses his phone aside. Yeah, I

29:17

think we're good. And then Vanessa Moon

29:19

or a brunette version of the Jodie

29:21

Comer character comes in. Wearing... Okay, so

29:23

here's where it gets confusing. Yeah.

29:26

She's wearing Jodie Comer's outfit from the movie. This is

29:28

where I'm being a purist. Oh, really? I'm

29:31

like, I've seen the movie. Yeah, so the

29:33

white blouse and the black chest harness is

29:36

like Jodie Comer's look. But Jodie Comer's

29:38

character in the game is a player

29:40

character. Oh. So, it's

29:42

weird that she's like, I'm just an NPC

29:44

and I'm like dressed as Jodie

29:47

Comer. Yeah, interesting. It has nothing to

29:49

do with the movie immediately. Like I'm

29:51

like, you're sort of cosplaying a character,

29:53

but then you immediately establish that you're

29:55

not actually that character. Yeah. Like

29:57

no reference to her name or anything. Yeah. also

30:00

an NPC but then has agency which

30:02

I'm like okay sentient yeah I'm confused

30:04

I also thought it was

30:07

like extremely meta that we're in VR and

30:09

then where he's putting on VR so we're in

30:11

like double VR yes yeah we're him with our little

30:16

headset on and then he puts his VR on

30:18

so now yeah we're in an incentive level here

30:20

that she like yeah she hands him a pair

30:22

of glasses and was like you left me at

30:24

these like left these at my place the last

30:26

time I hung out yeah and then we see

30:28

his game interface we have like a game interface

30:30

we have VR and then we have also ads

30:33

popping up at the bottom right with like a

30:35

little VR guy because this is hosted by like

30:37

a VR site that's advertising in video so now

30:39

we're in the third level

30:42

of inception you know he's

30:44

got like his little glasses on where

30:46

we see like some interesting yeah she's

30:48

like yeah so now I understand everything

30:50

yeah and then we

30:52

do we so we do all that and then

30:54

we're just we just have very basic sex yeah

30:57

like she's just like well I do you know

30:59

I've been like killing other players you know I've

31:01

been kind of like wandering around killing other players

31:03

but there is one thing I want to try

31:05

I want to know what it feels like to

31:07

fuck you I'm like okay so everything about this

31:10

is not a non-player character because like

31:12

they have agency wants

31:15

desires whatever yeah and then yeah we just

31:17

have extremely boring sex yeah I want to

31:19

give them credit for trying because the whole

31:22

premise of free guy is like what

31:24

if a non-player character came alive you know

31:27

like yeah they had agencies so like they're

31:29

almost doing that but Ryan Reynolds character is

31:31

the NPC and

31:33

it would be I'm like it's so it's

31:35

such low-hanging fruit you could have had him

31:37

be like I'm alive I

31:40

like have agency I want to fuck this

31:42

chick because that's really what the movie is

31:45

about like he you know like it would have just

31:47

been like an

31:49

NPC wants to interact with the game

31:51

player but instead it's like reverse and

31:53

confusing I don't know it's they

31:56

did what they did right this act is

31:58

like almost not worth waiting for Yeah,

32:00

well, and then she's like, I want you to

32:02

do the work. Then like us is, you know,

32:04

the main character is like, fucks her. Yeah. But

32:06

before she was just like writing and doing everything.

32:09

But yeah, I was just Yeah, she was writing

32:11

him. She comes apparently in 30 seconds.

32:14

No, she doesn't. And then she's like, All right, your

32:16

turn to do the work. And then we just sort

32:18

of watch him. Fucker doggy

32:20

style. And it's fine.

32:22

Yes. You know, let's

32:25

talk about this other video, because I would have to say

32:27

I was thoroughly impressed. Yes,

32:29

yes. This one, this is

32:31

nailing the assignment. Like, I

32:33

was really impressed with this for sure. This

32:36

is from Persifonia on many vids.

32:38

It's called NPC gets fucked. And

32:41

this is like, I

32:43

don't know, she just the way she like,

32:45

sort of like inhabits the like movement and

32:47

everything. Yeah. And like the like waving. Yeah,

32:50

it's like, so smart.

32:52

And like, and even like the the

32:54

scroll. Yes. There's so much about this

32:57

that is nailing the game format. Like

32:59

messages that appear in text below

33:01

her, the sounds like brring. Yeah,

33:04

there's also like jump cuts where

33:06

like, she's wearing clothing and she's

33:08

doing this like, yeah, steady

33:10

pace back and forth. And then it goes chiching

33:12

and her like top comes off. And then she's

33:14

still pacing. And it's like chiching. And then her

33:16

bottom comes off. And I'm like, this

33:19

is great. Yes, this is exactly

33:21

like it feels so like accurate and faithful.

33:23

Right. To the game space. But I'm like,

33:25

this would nail it for me. And like,

33:27

I have to admit, I was weirdly turned

33:29

on by this. And I was like, I

33:32

didn't play video games. Like, what is happening?

33:34

Because I loved the options where it was

33:36

like, how could I repay you? And then

33:38

it was like, Yeah, you don't have to

33:40

like, no worries. Like, oh, I'm kind of

33:42

hungry. You can maybe food like, well, you're

33:44

sort of hot. You could let me fuck

33:46

you. And then it was like, obviously, we click on

33:48

option three. And then yeah, it's like,

33:50

do you want to fuck my face? Like,

33:52

yes or no, you know, and then yeah,

33:55

yeah. And then it's like a dildo. Yeah,

33:57

it has like an element of consent built

33:59

into to it somehow. Like

34:01

I'm for your use. Like there's a line where

34:04

she's like pound me hero. I am yours to

34:06

use. Yeah. The thing is like somehow you killed

34:08

a rat that she screamed about. Like it's hard

34:10

to the scream. There's a rat helper with the

34:12

rat and then you get to fuck her. Right.

34:14

And she uses this fuck machine to

34:16

get fucked by you. Yeah. So what's funny is

34:19

we kind of fully see the machine like she's

34:21

not really hiding that. Yeah. Like it kind of

34:23

starts partially in frame and then we see the

34:25

sort of metal of it. But that's kind of

34:27

one of her things I thought appears in a

34:30

few other videos. Yeah. But it's like it's

34:32

great production. There was even like I loved that there

34:34

was a moment where it was like use

34:37

a toy like yes or no. You know. And then

34:39

like yes. And then it was like you want me

34:41

to come for you. Like you know like it's and

34:44

you want to come on like do you

34:46

want to come on me like that kind

34:49

of thing while keeping this NPC like behavior.

34:52

Yeah. It was so good. Yeah.

34:54

And then it was like come on me hero and

34:57

then it was like cut come you know like you

34:59

know. Yeah exactly. And then it was

35:02

like yeah. And then confetti. Yeah. It

35:04

was like strange claps. Yeah.

35:06

It was incredible work. I loved it. It

35:08

also weirdly turned me on too. Yeah. And

35:10

I was like what's happening. Like I think

35:12

it was just the free use like I

35:14

like free use but I was like

35:16

sort of like just enjoying the production of it is

35:19

like well done really well done. And I was like

35:21

I'm into this like yeah. I

35:23

don't know. It's just like well set up and

35:25

she was like everything from like her movement and

35:27

her commitment to the performance

35:30

and like every element of production and

35:32

the editing and the sound and the

35:34

music and like all of it. It was just

35:37

like perfectly executed. So if this is your thing

35:40

check out personia. Yeah. And it's many vids. So

35:42

I imagine she does custom vids. So like

35:44

you also are into NBC and want

35:46

her to like do a specific

35:48

game or genre or a different kind of vibe.

35:50

I bet that's available. I'm I'm proud of her.

35:52

It's great work. I don't

35:55

know her but I'm proud of her. I'm proud of her too.

35:57

I literally the last thing I wrote was incredible work.

35:59

Yeah. Well done, Persifonia. Well

36:02

done. Well, hey, thanks so much

36:04

for listening to Girls on Porn. You can

36:07

find us on our Instagram and TikTok at

36:09

Girls on Kern. That's Cairn Without the O

36:11

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36:14

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36:16

our Patreon, patreon.com slash

36:18

girlsonporn. Maybe helpful to know that

36:21

our Patreon now also has a

36:23

new component, which is basically mini

36:25

bonus episodes where we focus

36:27

a bit more on our personal

36:30

lives, our preferences, like, and

36:32

we take fan and follower listener

36:34

questions, like folks will write it and

36:36

say, for example, how do you feel

36:39

about thirst traps? Do you send them? Well, you

36:41

have concerns about security and we talk about that

36:43

kind of thing. So it's a little bit more

36:45

of a behind the scenes peek. Thanks for that

36:47

suggestion, by the way, Sebastian. Also, don't forget to

36:49

rate, review and subscribe. If you haven't already, a

36:51

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36:56

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37:05

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37:08

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