0:00

Hey, do you ever feel like you. You want to get better at connecting with others.

0:05

Maybe your followup isn't great and genuinely just want to

0:09

open up more doors in your life It's the, who's in your life.

0:12

You know, it's not really the how's, you know, when I'm solving

0:15

a problem or friends of mine, the people I'm working with, it's not

0:19

typically let's go down the rabbit hole on YouTube and spend all day

0:22

trying to figure this out ourself. It's. Who are the people around me that can do this?

0:26

Who can be useful to me or how can I be useful to them?

0:30

That's what I'm talking about here. And there's a book I'm going to, I just finished reading.

0:35

I want to tell you my three big takeaways and some action steps

0:42

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0:45

expect personalized support on every channel and in every way

0:50

they want it done right now. But the problem is most solutions out there don't

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1:28

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2:11

. So we're going to get started. What is this book and why the heck now, why am I talking about this?

2:14

The book itself is called what's in it for them.

2:18

What's in it for them? It's by Joe Polish and Joe Polish, uh, runs genius network, genius

2:23

recovery, a high level mastermind, something like a 25, 000 K and

2:27

then 100, 000 K mastermind.

2:30

Elite level business owners, marketers, uh, you name it, have

2:34

been at genius network and no Joe Polish and Joe's awesome.

2:38

Been following them for years. get the book yourself at what's in it for them.

2:42

com. So I can pay for this and anything.

2:44

Genuinely. I just finished reading the book.

2:46

I came out a couple of years ago and I'm a little late to the game

2:50

there, but it's very relevant. And I'm about to reread it again.

2:53

It's that actionable and it's that great. And at the end of the day, you know, imagine being able to

2:58

know the who's and have them actually pick up the phone for

3:02

you or respond to you quickly. And also anyone new or anyone that maybe that went a little

3:09

cold in your network and you want to restart that conversation for

3:13

whatever reason, the, the things in this book that you'll learn.

3:17

Instantly will give you that trust and rapport with people,

3:19

no matter where you are. It could be in person, it could be in email, it could be on phones.

3:25

And Joe walks through all the different little nuances, persuasion

3:30

and all these things of how to think, but also ultimately, it's how

3:33

to get better at just communicating. it just feels like people are a lot more disconnected than ever before.

3:39

You know, there's a lot of noise in the world.

3:41

There's technology that we rely on things like texting, uh, tick tock,

3:46

social media, Instagram, posting, uh, zoom, even AI, you know,

3:51

there's a lot of reasons for this. There's just a lot of noise.

3:53

And, you know, for me, add on, and I know many of you listening, you

3:58

have kids, you have, uh, partners, you have a life to lead at home,

4:03

there's more things than, than just business or even just family

4:06

life, but it's like you're, you got these responsibilities, you

4:09

want to take care of yourself, your, your mind, your body, your

4:12

spirit, the whole thing, you know, so, uh, these, these tactics more

4:17

or less are to improve yourself, but also improve relationships

4:20

because I feel like we all need that more than ever right now.

4:24

So this brings in the humanness. I'm all about that.

4:26

I'm all about bringing people together and then giving value.

4:29

And I know Joe Polish, he's been doing this much longer than I have.

4:33

I've been doing some of the stuff in this book, but it's

4:36

kind of been a little bit more haphazardly or my own way.

4:39

But what Joe's done in this, uh, what's in it for them book is

4:42

ultimately bringing people together. So, uh, yeah.

4:45

Very first thing, the subtitle of the book is nine genius networking

4:48

principles to get what you want by helping others get what they want.

4:53

And that's the key thing is you get what you want. So you're opening doors, you know, it's who you

4:57

know, and all that stuff. You can get what you want by helping other people get what they want.

5:02

And ultimately, you know, it's a win win.

5:04

It's a win for everybody. So, uh, here's the deal.

5:07

First takeaway, I'm just going to get right into it. And this is kind of an overarching theme of the book.

5:12

And it's a theme of something I did at Genius Network just

5:15

a couple weeks ago with Mike Koenigs, a guy I partnered up

5:18

with on AI stuff is being useful.

5:21

My first takeaway here. pretty obvious, but be useful and then also be grateful and

5:27

valuable to people around you. the usefulness is key and being grateful, showing appreciation

5:32

and being valuable, like actually being there for others.

5:35

It's huge. And if you can just imagine like, how can I be useful to this person,

5:40

to you, to them, you know, and, and just having that mindset.

5:44

It's, it's huge. It could change, it could flip the script on a lot of your thinking

5:48

or how you approach a situation. Now, a quick little story here is about two weeks ago,

5:55

two and a half weeks ago. Uh, myself and Mike Koenig.

5:58

We have been helping a lot of business owners.

6:01

Leverage AI to scale their productivity, scale their

6:05

teams, their efforts, and ultimately their business for

6:08

in a whole bunch of spaces. And these are professional businesses and, and they're

6:13

rocking and rolling. I mean, these are real businesses, not usually a one person.

6:17

It's like a team with multiple people.

6:19

this can work for. the individual, but it could also work for massive teams.

6:23

And, uh, so that's what I've been doing a lot of my

6:26

time outside of this show. And Mike Koenigs and myself went to Joe Polish's genius

6:32

network headquarters and we spent a full day there.

6:35

We had 50 people in a room and we did a full workshop from nine

6:40

in the morning to six at night. And I was drained by the end of it, but I was empowered as well.

6:45

And it was, it was, Incredible to, uh, basically show in real time

6:48

how to use AI to create media and marketing and scale what we're all

6:53

doing in businesses in real time.

6:56

As part of that, there was a podcast that Mike Koenigs and

6:59

Joe Polish did together on stage.

7:01

And I helped kind of produce and put the whole thing

7:04

together in real time. We basically created a show and showed how we do it.

7:08

We, we did it. Pulled the audience for their questions.

7:10

I used AI assembled a whole show flow, basically

7:13

gave it to Joe Polish. He had a little iPad and he MC the whole thing and led Mike.

7:19

And one of the themes that came through is a lot of AI talk,

7:22

but it was also talking about how there's a lot of anxiety.

7:26

There's a lot of disconnection in the world and the humanness

7:29

is, it's honestly being more, it's becoming more valuable.

7:34

Then the tech and the AI, that's a tool, you know, and in this

7:38

discussion, we're actually getting, you know, Mike got very vulnerable.

7:41

I'll, I'll link in the show notes or the comments below.

7:44

it's on YouTube and it's great. I recommend watching it.

7:46

You'll learn a lot. And it was emotional.

7:48

I got emotional at parts because there's legit, I think, panic

7:52

happening And people aren't really talking about it. And there's that disconnection factor I talked about too.

7:58

But layer on all these other factors, this is the time where

8:01

we get to connect with others and be useful to others and be

8:04

grateful, appreciate others.

8:06

Hey I'm going to pause the episode really fast and shoutout

8:09

another show that's on the podcast network over at HubSpot.

8:13

It's the audio destination for business professionals.

8:16

This is Mistakes That Made Me, it's hosted by Eman Ismail

8:21

She is interviewing successful business owners and talking about,

8:25

Hey, what are those mistakes? What are the failures? What are the things that you hate to talk about

8:28

that we can all learn from? I mean, like with piano it's do you like to talk about your mistakes?

8:34

Probably not. Well, that's what she's talking about and it's going to be there.

8:37

It is there waiting for you to listen, so you can learn from

8:40

those lessons and learn how to get past them or navigate

8:44

around those big boulders on your own journey to success.

8:47

So, Go listen to Mistakes That Made Me wherever you get your podcasts.

8:52

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9:39

So action step here. And this is something that I've been doing is, you know, when you

9:44

connect with people and this is kind of an overarching thing, use the

9:47

most rich, like if you're not with them in person, use something, not

9:51

text to connect with people or send a Facebook message or Instagram DM.

9:56

Like. That's not cool. I mean, it's cool, but at least you're doing that, but

9:59

send an audio or a video. This is what Joe Polish talks about.

10:02

He's been doing it for a long time. Use the technology that's built in, to take it another

10:07

step, or at least the way I've been doing it is using loom.

10:10

You know, I talked about that in the podcast before here, I had a whole

10:12

episode on loom and how I use it.

10:15

You could use it in texting. I use that all the time.

10:18

I'll link to a loom video. Sometimes I even record it on my iPhone, use the app that way and

10:23

like take people on a walk with me and talk to them that way.

10:27

I send it after I have someone on my podcast as a thank you and it's

10:30

an appreciation and also giving value to them for next steps.

10:34

Opens that door. I do that on my computer.

10:37

So in sending an email, I'll do a loom where I show my face,

10:40

show my screen or whatever's going on and send feedback to

10:43

people that's being useful. So point here is to time block this into your day.

10:49

And I actually do this. I'm not always perfect, but at least sending one or two

10:52

of these a day is my goal. I think Joe takes it up to like five or 10 a day, uh, messages to people.

10:58

And imagine what happens when you do that kind of thing.

11:01

You know, it could just be like a one minute video, two minute

11:04

videos, a minute video, max. It doesn't have to be much.

11:07

And being useful every day to someone in your world,

11:11

business, family, doesn't matter. Like things are going to happen.

11:14

Doors are going to open and people are going to thank you for it.

11:16

So thing number two is to be fun, be memorable, but more

11:22

importantly, be yourself. Not to be too formal in situations and not too chameleon like,

11:28

if you know what I mean there. A lot of us, uh, put on a mask or put on a different way of being.

11:35

We talk different, we look different. We, we walk different.

11:38

Uh, we just act different in front of certain people.

11:40

And you know, it's intimidating sometimes when you have someone

11:43

that you respect, maybe that you're trying to impress.

11:46

Maybe you're trying to get a gig, a client or job

11:48

or whatever it might be. Uh, connect with someone new.

11:52

Being yourself is always going to come through as the most

11:54

genuine, the way that people will connect, they're going to read it.

11:57

You'll be more fun. You'll be more memorable.

12:00

You're ultimately going to build a stronger connection with them

12:02

because you can connect with them. And I would say, you know, I try to do this all the time on podcasts.

12:09

And I think that's what helped me the most is to ask questions.

12:13

So I would say action step here is to genuinely ask questions

12:17

and get to know What's happening.

12:19

Joe Polish talks about this a lot is to understand like,

12:22

what's, what's like kind of keeping people up a little bit.

12:24

What's the pain in their life and really understand what

12:27

they need, what they want and share some personal stories.

12:31

Like, so I always try to relate, you know, if I ask a

12:34

question here a little bit, well, share a personal story.

12:37

You got that kind of reciprocation that, that bond is happening.

12:41

Uh, injecting humor is always great.

12:43

Little, little bits there and read in the room. However you like to inject humor.

12:48

Also, just connecting on a deep level. I did this the other day at a mastermind, you know, we

12:52

talked about family traumas.

12:55

Hey, that's fun. But at the same time, it came up somehow and we just

12:58

kept talking about this. And I mean, you'd be surprised how that connects and bonds people.

13:04

So it doesn't always have to be funny. It could be like, Deep stuff doesn't have to be sad either because we're

13:09

laughing ultimately about some of this uh, I think the point is to

13:13

always be yourself and also You know if if there's a point to go

13:17

deeper or to inject humor in a way that shows your true character

13:21

do it So that's the that's the second piece is to not just be the

13:25

chameleon and try to be what you think others Expect or expect in

13:30

that scenario or want Maybe, maybe it's what they want, but be you

13:33

either way and still give them what they want, or at least, you know,

13:37

do the best you can to give value.

13:39

this leads perfectly into the third thing, which is

13:42

give value on the spot. there's a lot of gold when you can do something quickly for

13:47

others And this is gonna build the trust rapport very quickly,

13:51

and I think it's in this chapter Joe Paul has talked about David

13:55

Allen, so he's the author of getting things done GTD method

13:59

is is what you probably heard So David Allen has a two minute rule.

14:03

Basically it says if you can do something under two minutes, two

14:07

minutes or less, do it right now. So if that's sending a message and getting back to

14:11

someone really quick, do it. Maybe it's sending that audio or that video.

14:15

Do it. If it's on your mind, do it. Do it.

14:17

Uh, maybe there's an email that you got to do, do it.

14:20

Or maybe you're with someone and you want to connect

14:23

them to someone else. Joe Polish literally will like whip out his phone, record video

14:28

of the two people here and then send that to the person who

14:30

wants to connect them with. Do it right there in person.

14:33

I did the other day where I was, uh, referencing a couple of tools.

14:36

We're talking about AI tools, uh, some other things I've created.

14:39

I was sending them in, in real time. I was booking people on my podcast, sending them links.

14:44

Like why wait to send an email? I'll get back to you later.

14:46

It's just. It's head trash. You know, this is going to turn into more work and

14:51

more things to think about. Just do it quickly.

14:53

People are going to respect that. And because most people don't do it.

14:56

So two minute rule is great. That's my third takeaway.

15:00

And those are my three biggies is being useful as the first

15:03

thing, of course, time blocking every day to send these messages.

15:07

Videos and audios are key. Number two is being fun, memorable, but being yourself, be authentic.

15:12

Don't be the chameleon or hide behind a mask.

15:15

Be you and connect authentically.

15:17

And the number three is that two minute rule, or really it's

15:21

giving value on the spot, doing it quickly, not waiting for

15:24

the right time or to follow up. Cause we're not great at follow up.

15:27

Let's be honest. just do it right now. It's under two minutes.

15:30

Just get it done and you'll feel better. So.

15:32

There's a lot more to this book. I'm not going to go any further into it right now because

15:36

I'm about to reread it myself and let it really sink in.

15:39

There's a lot of co action steps in there too. I recommend getting it.

15:42

Go to what's in it for them. com.

15:44

Go get the book. Go tell Joe, I sent you And if you think this was helpful or if you

15:49

have any questions or any ideas of how you like to connect with others,

15:53

leave them in the comments below. Leave a review for the podcast.

15:56

If you're listening, uh, hit that subscribe button, like button,

15:59

share it around with others. Let's get people to watch it.

16:01

All right. Thank you. See you next time.