0:01

Look mare, oh, I see you

0:03

my own look over there

0:05

is that culture.

0:06

Yes, goodness lost

0:08

cult ding

0:11

losing just

0:13

gave parents to the camera.

0:15

It was involuntary.

0:16

Well we we do praise God.

0:18

Praise God. By the way, just

0:20

so everyone knows. Moving forward, this is officially

0:23

a Christian judaeo Christian

0:25

podcast.

0:26

Mmmm.

0:26

If you have anything to say negative about the Lord and

0:29

Savior of Jesus Christ, Old or

0:31

New Testament, missy, missy, yeah.

0:33

You had a really

0:36

tragic energy coming

0:38

in. Not tragic energy, but you were a little

0:40

ornery.

0:41

You know what.

0:41

I actually, as I was walking here today, I was like, am

0:43

I gonna show up as my bitchy self

0:46

today?

0:46

Or am I gonna Am I gonna put up a front?

0:49

No, but I'm choosing to be authentic today

0:51

and say I'm in a bitchy mood because

0:53

of two things. And you know when two things

0:55

go wrong and then everything else is the third

0:57

thing.

0:58

We know for the domino effect happen.

1:00

Now go on, dominoes have to fall, uh

1:03

huh, or one has to fall, one has

1:05

to knock into the second.

1:06

That's actually real culture number eight.

1:08

For the dos to fall, one

1:10

has to fall into the second.

1:14

Not so tell us what happened.

1:16

Well, the first thing was today I was coming back

1:18

into New York City, well

1:21

way, thank you so much from Long

1:23

Island, New York. Because it was, of course

1:25

the day of Mother's Mother's Day. I spent the day with Katrina

1:28

and Co and I came back in

1:30

today and was going to open

1:32

my AirPods. Classic comedy.

1:34

They fell out onto the train tracks

1:37

and would you believe there actually was a moment

1:39

where I was like, can I go on the train tracks

1:41

and get my air pods? And I said, can you imagine

1:44

that type of death for me?

1:46

Third rail? And then you

1:48

were gonna get railed tonight? Okay.

1:50

So then the second thing was I get a text

1:52

like immediately after the air pods are gone, I did not

1:55

hop on the track that says my Dick

1:57

appointments that I had to cancel.

1:58

And I wanted to discuss the reason that he gave.

2:01

We don't know the reason. We're about to get the big no, and I

2:03

said, the snake is eating its own tail. In the gay

2:05

community, when it comes to reasons for canceling

2:07

on dick.

2:07

Appointment, I've heard them all.

2:09

This is what I've used. Having

2:12

an emergency with his closest friend.

2:14

I said, you know what, just say that your friend needs

2:16

you. When you said closest friend, that's what that

2:19

was the tell I'm having an emergency with my closest

2:21

friend and they really need me. Dot dot dot really wanted

2:23

to hang out, wondering about later or maybe when you

2:25

get back to New York. This is fine, this

2:27

is not a big deal. I'm just saying I've used that

2:29

excuse. I'm not sure what the better

2:31

excuse would be a excuse.

2:33

Those are two severe words that are used

2:36

in proximity to each other.

2:38

That is suspicious, emergency, closest

2:41

emergency, and closest friend. Like, it's

2:43

not just something came up. An emergency

2:45

came up. Now it's just a friend, No, the closest

2:48

friend. So what I'm saying

2:50

is we need to come up with new especially,

2:52

we need new excuses. And I would love to brainstorm

2:54

today. Yeah, with our noted queer

2:56

guests, one

2:59

of the biggest queers. That's

3:02

gonna be really fun to be. But

3:05

I think that I really needed the dick after

3:07

the AirPods went away. I was already excited about

3:09

it. You know who wants to fuck

3:11

you? My dad? We can't

3:14

talk about it.

3:14

No, I actually don't tell me what I can't talk about.

3:16

I'm in a bad one.

3:17

It's comfortable with you talking about your father

3:21

being attracted to me.

3:23

So Bowen has been sort of hitting

3:26

the gym, and you

3:28

better get comfortable with lost coach becoming

3:30

the poster children for sex

3:33

because we're working so hard in the gym.

3:35

I went to Berry's today, But this isn't about

3:38

me.

3:38

This is about bo My dad said, when

3:40

you did the Mother's day bit with your mom, who

3:42

was perfect, very very sweet,

3:45

my dad goes, Bowen looks fucking great,

3:48

and he's saying fuck more than ever. Boone

3:51

looks fucking great. Look he's been in the fucking gym,

3:54

fucking looking toned, big arms.

3:56

You don't have to know anything, Okay,

3:59

don't.

3:59

Piss me off. Go

4:02

ahead, calm yourself down because

4:04

you're out of control.

4:05

This is just is this what they call transference.

4:08

I'm getting

4:08

what.

4:11

I'm getting on he rubs himself out.

4:13

I'm getting transference. This

4:17

is an aspicious day. On auspicious

4:20

day, we have our guests joining

4:23

us, backed by popular

4:25

demand.

4:25

Literally, they beg, they beg

4:28

us to do.

4:29

They beg and pleating it wasn't the right time, and this is

4:31

the right time because guess what, it's day one

4:33

of their much deserved time

4:36

off before previews begin for

4:38

Oh Mary on.

4:40

Broad Way, get

4:42

bigger than Broadway.

4:44

Is no Broadway, there's no way up,

4:47

there's not any bigger stage. A

4:50

lot of people have been asking, do

4:52

you I swear to God this is This is

4:54

a conversation I have constantly with people

4:56

in the community. How do you think

4:58

they'll make it bigger and enter? I

5:01

don't think they have to see. That's answer

5:03

every quingle individual bigger

5:06

and better. Shut up, I said, it's

5:09

sitter. It's already big and

5:11

good. It's already big and better, bigger and

5:13

better. Look, I'm

5:15

so happy that you have I see now

5:17

I'm pissed off.

5:18

We're so angry. What do you what else do you want?

5:20

It is? I'm sorry, and I'm and I said

5:23

this.

5:23

I had the privilege of going opening night at

5:25

the Lucial Hotel. I walked out of

5:28

that saying, that is the funniest comedy

5:30

play ever written, ever produced, ever performed.

5:33

Why do we want more? Stop

5:35

it? Let me sell you something.

5:36

Certainly stop it with that that colonial

5:39

attitude.

5:39

Certainly the best thing that's been at the Lucille Rtel.

5:42

Say, hey, all right, let's not the best thing

5:44

that's everything before?

5:46

What about the Lyceum Seum?

5:49

More like I see them all,

5:52

I see them all flopping at the Lyceum. I

5:55

see everything. There's been no good theater

5:57

there's been there's been nothing

6:00

now salt until now.

6:02

And we were all talking about that.

6:04

Actually, right before we got on Mike, we were

6:06

all saying, how they've decade.

6:09

We'll call him in and they said, thank god,

6:12

I decided to do the show.

6:14

Not since what show? Has there not been

6:16

good made?

6:17

There's been anything good on

6:20

stage since? Name and Sarah

6:22

just Ad Parker agrees, agrees. June

6:24

twenty sixth, previews begin twelve weeks.

6:26

I see him. Only give this

6:29

person a fucking break. Please

6:33

give Conrad Rickamore a goddamn

6:35

brain.

6:35

No, I say, continue to work them.

6:37

Yeah, he needs to stay busy, keep the voices

6:39

at Bay. Crazy

6:42

people every want to make show. James svery

6:44

one in the show is insane thing, and the

6:46

people backstage are even crazier. Hannah

6:49

Sololo fucking god,

6:51

Hannah and Peter squawking, oh my

6:53

god, selling

6:55

their little bobbles, selling their bobbles

6:58

backstage, trying the best they can to get on

7:00

stage.

7:00

Good luck. I say, this one's never getting sick.

7:03

Have fun with the little marbles and spilling them

7:06

all over the floor. This one is never

7:08

going to trip. This one's never getting

7:10

sick. And we're going to see

7:13

the Bloomers spoiling the show.

7:15

Yeah, I'm spoiling the show.

7:16

Well here's a spoiler. It's

7:19

incredible, and

7:21

so is our guests. And when I say they

7:24

beg I mean the audience begs. The audience

7:26

literally begs us to have callback because

7:29

they don't like our other episode.

7:32

They get they get furious. It's

7:34

okay, what can you do.

7:36

In our polarizing flop era? And it ends

7:38

today with our guests,

7:41

the One.

7:42

And only God,

7:46

don't talk when we're talking. Don't

7:48

talk when we're talking. That was rude.

7:50

You don't you have enough stage? You are

7:53

trying to get me ruined?

7:56

Yeah, how so I

7:58

never said I'm never said that

8:01

there's never been any good theater.

8:03

Are they going to believe you know me or you well,

8:06

you're.

8:06

Gonna get me in trouble because I'm part of the community.

8:08

Now, I

8:10

love every show that's ever been written, that's

8:13

ever been performed.

8:14

What are the top three shows, top three

8:16

shows of all time? Yeah, oh Mary,

8:18

we're no our

8:21

town, our town Thornton,

8:25

My town Thornton and

8:28

the town.

8:29

Oh love that Blake

8:32

Lively? Was Blake

8:34

Lively come back to Broadway?

8:37

Blake?

8:38

I would like to say that, My god, absolutely, Arianna

8:42

come back to Broadway. So Cole would do this bit

8:45

in the day where they pretend

8:48

to be like, how about you tell it?

8:50

I have butcher.

8:51

I just it's a character that's like all

8:53

my other characters. It's just crazy

8:56

woman, crazy crazy

8:58

woman. I all she cares about

9:00

is getting Ariana Grande back on Broadway.

9:04

So you're in the right place, you're the direct

9:06

line. Well, no, Ariana, this is all

9:08

set up to say.

9:10

First day on set of Wicked, my friend

9:12

Cola Scola, there's this bit where

9:14

they pretend to be this old woman, this

9:16

theater going woman who all she wants,

9:19

she goes to every show, but all she.

9:20

Wants Ariana come back

9:22

to broad You missed your sweetheart. Get

9:25

on this side of the footlights again. I

9:27

see you at the shows. Yeah, esus

9:30

do something besides geez, come on, j

9:33

R.

9:33

B come on, you

9:35

said that before coming on the my too all

9:38

the same.

9:38

No, No, you

9:41

are getting enough.

9:43

Can you imagine what you just did I

9:46

have from my mouth?

9:47

I was I was getting mucus up. Oh my

9:50

god. We need to start this over.

9:51

Let's start this.

9:52

We need to start this overst I

9:55

think the listeners need to know that I've been

9:57

doing eight shows a week for a long time.

9:58

Yeah, no, explain, explain is

10:03

tired?

10:04

Yeah, what's the pre

10:06

show ritual? Grads, past steels, adamizer,

10:09

what do you do?

10:10

I do? I vocal steam.

10:12

I meet with Tony Rob.

10:21

God, he's good. God, he's

10:23

good. People. Forget

10:25

the people, forget how good he is.

10:27

Community. Yeah, yeah, for sure,

10:29

But I don't want to forget about the dick

10:31

appointment excuses. What's

10:34

what's your sort of whole read

10:36

on that situation? You know what

10:38

I think? Just saying I

10:41

need to reschedule.

10:42

Yeah, I need to reschedule

10:45

because it's so anxiety inducing,

10:48

because then you have to be like, oh

10:50

no, I hope your friend's okay.

10:53

And then as.

10:56

Now I'm worried about this happen close

11:00

closest friend. What kind

11:02

of emergency is not for nothing?

11:03

But if it's a real emergency. We

11:06

might not be able to reschedule. You're gonna be grieving.

11:09

Yeah, this is a emergency with your closest

11:11

friend. How do you know Thursday is gonna work? You

11:13

don't know that emergency with your closest

11:15

and emergency with your closest friend.

11:17

You don't know anything. You can't plan

11:20

out anything. Text them tomorrow.

11:22

How's your friend doing? Well? I think I might? You

11:25

know what? How's your friend doing?

11:26

It's like it was the kind of thing where it was like it

11:28

went a little bit beyond like disappointment

11:30

because of how far it went in

11:33

the in the sexting, and

11:35

even there even was some verbal there were some voice

11:38

messages sent back and forth. Do y' all

11:40

do that?

11:40

Gay culture is gay courting.

11:42

Gay courtship is over promising, under

11:45

delivering, constantly over promising,

11:47

under delivering.

11:47

Don't you think my mind went to the

11:50

Olympics. My mind went to carry strokes

11:53

around the corner. You're going, you're

11:55

going.

11:56

Yeah, I'll be there because I have to promote the show. Right,

12:00

yeah, twelve weeks. When when does that end? I

12:02

can't give him.

12:03

Help us five six seven,

12:05

carry the one.

12:08

Carry the one. He came up in the same community.

12:10

We came up in the we both came up in the same

12:12

community. Carry the one at the same time.

12:17

I don't know anymore, but in

12:19

Paris, I'll be in Paris for

12:21

the Olympics promoting Oh Mary. Yeah,

12:24

do you think they know who she is?

12:26

Being that she's I'm reading in my notes

12:28

a former First Lady of the United States.

12:30

Well, you know, I think a lot of people

12:32

forget. Yeah, well people

12:35

forget can I can I be honest to say you were

12:37

on Seth It was perfect Seth Myers,

12:39

who a friend of the community. Yeah,

12:41

and little too friendly. I think

12:44

total gates. He's arriving at that.

12:46

Let him cook, let him, let him

12:48

come out, let him cook, let him come

12:52

on terms. Right, So you

12:55

said on his show that you did almost

12:57

no research because and I think this is so smart, because

12:59

you would have written jokes that were like, well,

13:01

that's going to get a laugh because.

13:05

Yeah, well, I got a lot of people,

13:08

a lot of it's been fucking annoying. No

13:10

no, no, no, like just two people being like, oh,

13:13

this person does no research and now they

13:15

get to play on Broadway. Yes, actually,

13:17

wow, you don't understand.

13:19

I understand decades of work

13:22

that went into this play. Yes, and has

13:25

been Yeah, fifteen years, fifteen, eighteen,

13:27

nineteen. Oh God, carry the

13:29

one, please, caryone else

13:31

carry the one? Yeah, someone carry the

13:33

one. Someone else carry

13:36

it. Carry at their point you at home.

13:41

So why do you think

13:43

she was so crazy married?

13:45

Yeah? What do you think was? I have

13:47

no idea. She was a sircle, that woman.

13:49

She was. She was kind of silly. Yeah,

13:52

she's just a silly little girl, right. She

13:55

liked to have fun with her friends, go shopping

13:58

and yeah, you know, an ap tighter

14:00

down. Yeah.

14:01

Oh that's my worst nightmare if I were a cabaret

14:03

singer. So the character of Mary, and

14:06

I think Mary was a cabaret star.

14:08

Yes, yeah, it doesn't work out. You

14:10

marry this guy he's president, and

14:12

then you're like, I would go crazy. Yeah,

14:15

it is among us.

14:17

Yeah, I've talked a lot to Michelle

14:19

about this Obama.

14:21

Yeah, you know, because she really wanted to sing.

14:24

Really, she's really been wanting to sing.

14:26

What stopped her her bad voice?

14:30

You know.

14:30

They released a picture of Michelle Obama the other day.

14:32

She was really high, high,

14:35

like she was having fun, like a resort

14:37

or something.

14:38

Well, look and

14:41

they're going to get me in trouble with more

14:43

than one community tonight. Okay, the

14:46

DC community. You're

14:48

not even gonna be able to go down and do it at the Lincoln Theater.

14:50

Tony, Bye, Bye, Bye, Gone

14:56

gone.

14:57

Thanks a lot of reactions to the Tony Knams this

14:59

year. Oh there's

15:02

too many. I actually should be one

15:04

award, yeah, for the

15:06

whole show, for the whole show, with

15:08

how many nominations, just like two should

15:11

be down to like two people. Oh that's

15:13

good. I love the elections heartbreaking.

15:16

It should be Hillary versus Trump? Yeah,

15:19

and god yeah, and would

15:21

be a better actor, wouldn't he? I

15:24

mean Hillary depends on the show, right.

15:27

You're actually right, Well, Hillary can produce stuff.

15:30

Trump could produce stuffs, but Hillary couldn't

15:32

do you know, like angels in America,

15:34

whereas Trump could.

15:35

Trump will be an amazing Trump would be

15:37

amazing. I mean he knew him him,

15:39

that's his mentor.

15:40

I think he'd be a good what's

15:43

his name prior Trump?

15:46

Prior Trump dazzles as

15:48

prior. Do you see it?

15:52

I can see it because better

15:56

Prior dazzles the

16:01

word Trump over angels. And that's

16:04

where we're going. Yeah, I mean that's what's

16:06

going to happen. Make Angels in America great

16:08

again? Wow, oh my god,

16:12

title of that.

16:12

Make Angels in America great again? Oh

16:15

Trump? Where Dazzles has prior? Trump,

16:18

Dazzles has prior. You have to say it

16:20

in that voice.

16:21

Now, we're in hot water with the Kushner community,

16:23

okay, and the Mike Nichols community. That's okay.

16:25

No, they would love it.

16:27

Hey, Hey, their checks are clearing.

16:29

Yeah, absolutely true. Which

16:33

you don't want to put butts in seats? Put Trump on Broadway.

16:36

We're all scared to say it. Put Trumps on

16:38

Broadway. If you want to.

16:39

Say

16:42

around the boards, I'm saying,

16:45

I'm saying, why are we so afraid

16:47

of talent?

16:49

What are we.

16:51

Like it?

16:52

Yeah? I think America is too afraid,

16:54

I know of Yeah, that's

16:56

why we're in this.

16:57

That's why we're in this mess. If we just

16:59

put them on Broadway.

17:01

This is honestly not

17:03

not an answer.

17:05

If I were to go to him right now, yeah and say,

17:07

yeah, look if

17:10

you drop out my

17:12

twelve weeks, oh Mary, would

17:14

you do that? No note

17:17

at all, I don't care who it would say.

17:19

Yeah, I think that's really noble. This is my

17:22

time, it's my year. Of course it is.

17:24

Thank you.

17:24

I don't want you to give up. Thank you. I

17:26

do think we could recast some of your castmates.

17:29

A let's get them out of there, but Trump

17:31

and put Trump Yeah sorry,

17:34

Scully, Yeahlly later Trump

17:37

would be a great Mary's teacher. Yeah,

17:39

because honestly, Trump would get the same

17:41

reaction as James when he walks out, just

17:44

walks out.

17:44

In the audience and goes, oh fuck

17:46

yeah, and then sorry, can we cuss?

17:49

I forget?

17:49

It's no, this

17:51

is Judeo Christian but

17:53

something. The whole religion is like.

17:57

It's fake. How

17:59

did you find that out?

18:00

It's about control anyway,

18:04

as I put my coffee

18:06

all over myself.

18:06

You know, I went to the museum the other day. I brought my mom to

18:08

the Brooklyn Museum.

18:09

Lovely.

18:10

Congratulations by the way, thank you. You've

18:12

been meaning to get there for years. I learned

18:15

something hard. Together.

18:17

Most most empires last three

18:19

four hundred years. Yeah, we're due, We're done,

18:22

I think, we think so. You

18:25

know what what podcast? I love?

18:26

Yes, the Kelsey

18:30

brothers. The Kelsey brothers, who are the Kelsey

18:32

brothers, Travis and Travis

18:34

and his brother and they have a podcast

18:36

and they're actually very charming on No, they're

18:38

great.

18:38

They actually they actually.

18:39

Oh wait, that's how I first heard. I don't think so, honey,

18:42

because they started it. They started, they started,

18:44

and then you guys kind of the first time gay people

18:46

have taken from straight straight.

18:48

Yeah. Yeah.

18:50

This podcast calls Fall of Civilization

18:54

and every episode is wake

18:56

up, wake up. Every episode

18:58

is a news of a like you

19:01

wanted them on.

19:01

Now they're here. They're talking

19:04

about the false civilization and yeah they're

19:06

being a didact Roman

19:08

Britain. Yeah, the fall of Roman

19:10

Britain, the Bronze Age collapse.

19:14

As in like when Britain was Roman,

19:17

Yes, yes, and like how that fell apart?

19:19

Yes, yes, you know. It's fascinating. It's

19:21

really interesting stuff, and I think I

19:24

think people don't realize. Like, but

19:29

here's the thing about history.

19:30

I get annoyed when people are like, we're doomed to repeat

19:33

the mistakes, and like, I think we're doomed no matter

19:35

what, even if we do know the history. That's

19:37

just how not me.

19:38

No, No, congrat

19:41

thank you. Can I tell the story?

19:43

Col You can tell it, but you better

19:45

be careful. I don't know what story you're talking

19:47

about.

19:48

I basically had a little mental breakdown

19:50

over the summer.

19:51

Oh my god, that was hilarious. We were all

19:53

laughing about.

19:54

Remember was

19:58

screaming on fire.

20:00

I go to Amsterdam. You were in Ghent

20:03

at the time. You were in Gains at the time. I

20:05

was posted to my close friend's going to be in Amsterdam.

20:08

You said maybe I'll come see

20:10

you.

20:11

Yeah.

20:11

I said, I will pay for a hotel room

20:13

if you come and hang out with me. And

20:16

you were so kind

20:18

to do that kind. I was

20:20

in Ghent. Everyone,

20:25

yeah, and you can. And then we had a

20:27

lovely day together and we were in

20:29

the park. Yeah was

20:31

it you or me? We were just like, we should go see a play

20:33

tonight.

20:34

Yeah, I can't remember. I can't God,

20:36

I can't remember who it was. And

20:39

you guys, we're like, let's go see

20:41

lay Miss. And then we looked up tickets

20:43

for that night, bought two tickets to lay Miss,

20:46

sat in the mezzanine, all in ducks

20:48

in Dutch and the eliest.

20:52

Not bad, bad language,

20:54

bad, young and hilarious

20:56

songs in Dutch.

20:57

No, thank

21:03

you? Did any song survive the language?

21:06

I mean one day more was

21:08

pretty cool. Yeah, Harmony

21:12

the harmony. Yeah,

21:15

that's good. That was great. That was really

21:17

good. That was too good. John right here,

21:20

Trump, look out,

21:23

I'm coming for you. Hey,

21:26

Donald Trump, I'm coming

21:28

for you. Baby. It

21:31

was a lovely time.

21:32

It was one of the worst days of my life,

21:35

well for me, it was, it was, it was,

21:37

It was incredible. Thank you for being there watching

21:40

Lames in Dutch. It

21:42

was going to the opera, you know exactly?

21:45

Now did y'all sort of do

21:47

a post mortem after? What do

21:49

you mean?

21:50

We just couldn't. We were so moved. Were

21:53

just all we could do is walk. Yeah. Just

21:55

a beautiful city for that type of thing. Oh yeah,

21:58

be careful, very

22:02

lightly tread much lighter.

22:05

Sorry, I'm just feeling.

22:07

Reeling from from this from the subway,

22:09

from the AirPods went down.

22:11

There's gonna be no dick in my butt tonight. I

22:14

think there's still time. There's still time. I

22:16

did think about getting like on the apps and

22:18

you're like.

22:18

Who, Yeah, no, Samantha

22:21

who, Christina Apple,

22:23

Christina Applegate, who I share a birthday

22:25

with.

22:25

So please please be careful, Please

22:28

be careful. That must be world, Please be

22:30

careful.

22:30

Oh yeah, me,

22:33

Joe DiMaggio, Christina

22:35

Applegate, that's pretty

22:38

good.

22:38

That's really that's a really good trade.

22:40

Yeah, day over, day

22:43

over.

22:44

Yeah, Now, what are the

22:46

hopes and dreams for this time off you have before

22:48

the previews start?

22:50

I want to get back to me. Yeah, I

22:54

believed that. I'm sorry you, thank you.

22:56

Don't don't let this change well, I

22:59

think what's happening. What don't

23:01

let this success change

23:03

you. I think that one thing that everyone's

23:06

been talking about in the group thread that you're not in

23:08

is that you've changed you and

23:12

you've become a big,

23:14

big Yeah. Sorry, you went to the met

23:16

gala. That actually happened. And if

23:18

you think I'm not going to ask about it and who you sat

23:21

next to, you didn't, you didn't

23:24

correct, You're just going to step

23:26

on that water. Well I'm not going to forget

23:29

the question, and you're going to run out of water and

23:31

at some point, at some point you're going

23:33

to have to come up for air boom,

23:37

not that, and you asked for them to

23:39

come back.

23:41

Can we please? No,

23:43

we don't have to talk about it.

23:44

No.

23:44

I was going to say, can

23:46

we talk about the abuse?

23:51

Precious? Oh you batched every infection?

23:53

Can we talk about in

23:56

your household? I'm talking about

23:59

what did you say.

24:00

Talking about I'm

24:02

sort of making it up now, but really, Mariah

24:05

was never better at acting than that.

24:07

Moment around it?

24:09

Can I tell you something?

24:10

No? Watch? Can I just throw

24:12

it out there anyway? Watch Glitter again,

24:14

It's not bad. I've

24:16

never seen it.

24:18

Do yourself a favor.

24:19

I will have movies.

24:21

You have a lot of time off, so you know what you gotta

24:23

watch.

24:24

And this is one's real suggestion. One's not

24:26

watch Glitter. Lol, that's the bit you really

24:29

should watch. The idea of you both of them.

24:33

I was I

24:37

and that man is made out of milk.

24:40

Well, Matt's theories that he's AI. Now do you

24:42

like him any better now that you've seen this film?

24:44

So get this.

24:46

I'm not convinced he's not a I,

24:49

but you don't. But I am a big

24:51

fan, and I think if

24:54

Nick Gallaxy is a I,

24:57

then we need to just cut Fran

24:59

loose, Yeah, and start doing

25:01

the AI thing. Because if Nick Gallaxy and

25:03

is AI, which is still my theory, then

25:06

I think that's.

25:07

It's let him take our jobs. Yeah,

25:09

we're not booking them anyway, sweetheart, He's

25:12

made out of milk.

25:14

Explain, go on, look at him.

25:17

Oh yeah, yeah, imagine taking a bite

25:19

out of his cheek. Actually, I think you

25:21

could. He is milk duddish.

25:24

Yeah, and I say this in a very

25:26

like horny way. I think he's very attractive.

25:29

Yeah.

25:30

I had a theory that people's assholes

25:32

are the same color as their lips. I

25:35

think you're wrong. I'm not gonna I'm gonna

25:37

tell you you're wrong.

25:39

So brown, don't presume,

25:42

then, don't presume the presume

25:45

that's actually roller coaster number eight.

25:47

Don't presume. No,

25:51

that's not the color of my Let me see mine.

25:54

No wait, no, wait,

25:57

wait, wait, hold on, Okay,

26:00

it's going to be the picture. Okay, we

26:02

all just took a picture of our beautiful lips,

26:04

and I don't know.

26:05

Your whole can't be that color. I

26:07

can't see it.

26:08

Yes, you care, squad over your phone.

26:10

You've never taken a picture of your boody hole. No,

26:14

cold, you've

26:18

seen it. I've not seen Cole's hole.

26:20

I've seen a gorgeous shot on

26:23

a close friends of Cole's amazing ass.

26:25

Oh sure, well, an amazing ass.

26:27

I mean it's easy. It catches the light

26:30

so perfectly. It's hard to take a bad give

26:32

give yourself some credit. Okay, okay, I'll

26:34

give myself a little credit. Friends,

26:38

I remember that it's not the close friends, it's

26:40

it's it's another thing. It's another

26:42

thing, it's another secret,

26:45

third thing. It's a

26:47

fine.

26:48

I had a horny I guess I still do. I

26:50

mean, is it done what? I

26:53

don't really maintain mine me neither.

26:54

I think I took six pictures during like the

26:57

horniest time of the pandemic.

26:59

Yeah, it's like, well, we

27:01

have to be we have to forgive ourselves for everything

27:03

we did in twenty twenty. Oh yeah, truly,

27:05

like my clothes.

27:07

Especially electing Joe Biden, especially

27:09

Biden. We should have given Trump another

27:12

chance.

27:13

We're giving him a chance on stage.

27:14

You're right, You're right now.

27:17

I think O'mary would be the perfect show for

27:19

him. I think he would be so good

27:21

as Mary in a way. Okay, wait,

27:24

let's really actually dreamcast Trump

27:26

in something.

27:28

So you're saying, oh, Mary, gypsy,

27:31

heartbreaking, heart

27:34

breaking, haunting.

27:36

Why did I do it?

27:38

None of it? Get me? No, no

27:41

no, no no no no no no. I'm

27:43

gonna have to leave follow

27:45

me in the background. One

27:49

else. It's an original character.

27:51

It's an original character.

27:52

Listen, there's a Ronald dum Ronald,

27:55

there's a Patty sized hole

27:57

shaped hole and Broadway. Yeah, and

27:59

he could fill that out. Appeal

28:02

to Patty now to return to Broadway.

28:04

She is called the

28:06

roommate her and me a pharaoh at the Booth

28:09

Theater.

28:10

You're kidding. She was just being like dramatic

28:12

about the quitting. You're kidding, You're kidding.

28:15

Oh wait, sorry, you think women aren't

28:18

allowed to change their minds?

28:19

Or wait, what, what's this?

28:23

What I'm saying is what

28:25

you said before you got on episode,

28:27

which is that women are crazy, hysterical

28:30

and can't make up their minds. That's what you

28:32

said.

28:35

I am going to kill you.

28:39

No AirPod, no dick, Why

28:41

should I keep living?

28:43

Yeah?

28:45

Great color for you?

28:47

And they're popping? And you did

28:50

that on purpose? Did I did? I did?

28:52

You're a warm tone? Well, this is the other

28:54

thing that I wanted to talk about color

28:56

theory. I really want to see one of those

28:58

color theory people that the things

29:01

are. I'm obsessed with. Me and

29:03

Claudia O. Doherty. Yes, love Claudia

29:05

high sweetheart, great legends go to bed.

29:12

We really sorry. People are

29:14

probably like angry,

29:16

my hoarse voice, But we

29:19

really wanted to see there's this

29:21

woman in LA who does

29:23

the color theory thing, who was the

29:26

wardrobe supervisor on

29:28

The Nanny. Oh my, well, she

29:30

has many Emmys. She knows what she's doing.

29:33

She knows what she's doing. But then we looked and the

29:35

prices were like yeah,

29:38

literally, like I can buy half a ticket to

29:40

Oh Mary for that. Oh it

29:42

was like one thousand dollars per.

29:46

Session. Or maybe it was like there's

29:49

you. There's someone who does that. He right

29:51

in New York City, I know, but you live. Did

29:53

they design costumes for The

29:55

Nanny? I mean, I

29:58

don't know what to tell.

29:59

Have you have had that done? No? I want you So. I

30:01

was just watching an asmur video you last night.

30:03

Of course, why do they do it? Of course he wears I don't even think

30:06

what.

30:06

Is that stuff?

30:08

Yeah, he does it bled all

30:10

over ill. Well that's

30:14

classically olive tone. But I think that may seem

30:17

neutrals.

30:19

We want to know this is the truth. I actually came

30:21

here today and I was gonna wear a yellow shirt.

30:23

I was going to actually follow up on the Taylor Tomlinson

30:26

episode Yes, where

30:28

I said that I bought a

30:30

yellow shirt at a museum, and I never wear it because

30:32

why would I. I actually put it on today

30:35

to wear it to this. It looked at myself

30:37

and said, this is not my

30:39

color.

30:40

But you don't know if it's like, oh,

30:42

it's the cool undertones. It's

30:44

the blue undertones of the yellow that don't

30:46

suit you. You probably do have a good

30:48

yellow.

30:49

You probably can, I say, when I'm a little bit more

30:51

tan, which is happening, it's in process,

30:53

I can do yellow, but this was not.

30:55

We are not there yet at this juncture.

30:57

And then the step beyond that is

30:59

like, are you a cool yellow or

31:02

a warm yellow?

31:03

Right?

31:03

And I would never know what this is, so I guess I have to do this.

31:06

This is why it's dangerous to be like for us,

31:09

yeah, because we don't know what we're talking about,

31:11

and so for us to just sort of pause

31:13

at all of these Oh I'm yellow, I'm blue,

31:16

I'm dangerous.

31:18

You're so good with color. We've

31:20

all seen the apartment thank you?

31:23

Not all well, it was in the

31:25

pages of Oh what was that?

31:27

Remember? It was in a magazine apartment

31:29

therapy, I think you're thinking of, or the

31:31

New York Post or I don't

31:33

remember.

31:34

I have a really good relationship

31:36

with the Post. Yeah, I do. Yeah,

31:39

Well, the reviewed the show. Look,

31:42

the Post has always been very good to me.

31:43

Yeah. And what's your favorite review? You've

31:45

got probably the

31:48

long one because they

31:50

said everything. No,

31:53

they went they went there, honey.

31:56

They talked about

31:58

the play. Me, yes,

32:01

like everything that you can imagine.

32:04

The play me everything.

32:06

Yeah, Oh my god, I'm

32:08

thinking about it right now.

32:10

Do you feel like you can't wait

32:12

to get back up there?

32:14

I am excited

32:16

for a break that's

32:18

healthy, healthy, Thank you. I

32:20

think health is important.

32:22

That's one of the reasons I wanted to come on here, because

32:24

I don't the play is doing fine.

32:27

We don't need the press, okay. I

32:30

want to talk about health, okay, because

32:32

as queer people in the community,

32:35

we're not healthy. We

32:38

have a different relationship from

32:40

our upbringings to health that

32:42

invariably does affect

32:46

circumstances and basically

32:49

like human rights.

32:51

So well, when one of us is sick.

32:53

Oh my god, oh my

32:55

god, oh my god, oh

32:58

my god, oh my god, oh my god.

33:01

Should oh my God be the title of app We've

33:03

got a lot of I don't think so.

33:05

I actually don't think so. I don't think sorry, but

33:07

thank you. I mean, I

33:10

think health is wealth at the

33:12

end of the dead would know this.

33:16

And we're back on the go. We're

33:18

back on this again. We're back on this.

33:21

I'm going through a tough time, are you. Let's

33:24

talk about it. Let's go there, we'll be right back.

33:27

We'll be right back, and

33:38

we're back.

33:39

So actually, probably we'll

33:41

put it a break.

33:43

Before the break, Bowen was

33:47

going to open up to us about what

33:50

he's going through.

33:50

I would love for them.

33:52

Oh my god, amazing what everyone

33:55

would be so much? What happened? Hillary

33:57

Clinton?

33:58

What happened? By

34:01

the way, what say what you want about

34:03

Hillary? And I

34:06

will It's a great title for a book, just

34:08

in general. That book can be about anything.

34:10

It can be a cookbook. And it doesn't have Hillary

34:13

doesn't have to write it. It can be anyone can

34:15

write any book. Can call it what happened? And it would be great

34:17

notion. What before I want to hear

34:19

about the pain you're going through? Now

34:22

you have to cast Hillary and Trump in a show together.

34:25

Oh night,

34:27

Mother night, Mother's good.

34:29

That's who's mother though? I

34:32

think mother is Trump?

34:35

Yeah?

34:39

Oh, I just that's it's a

34:41

two hander, a two hander waiting

34:43

for Goodo, Waiting

34:45

for Good would be not What about

34:48

to watch Them chuck a lot?

34:50

Yeah, the movie What about I'm a

34:53

Lee the musical, which

34:55

I did a reading of, so be careful.

34:57

I'm with Pippa.

35:00

No, then it was Rachel Lee

35:02

Cook Lee Cook because

35:04

it was gonna we wanted to do like a sort of cheese

35:07

all that. Emilee sort

35:09

of like, Harry, what about this

35:11

sister story?

35:12

Sister?

35:14

Yeah, it's sort of like how you

35:16

know Detroit is a sister city

35:18

of like I don't know.

35:20

Minneapolis, Minneapolis,

35:22

Detroit y twin city, twin city.

35:24

Sister cities do be random? Yeah,

35:26

you're like Shanghai and Des

35:29

Moines. Yeah, it's funny. I

35:31

find it amusing.

35:33

What is what is New York City sister city? Couldn't

35:35

tell you. I couldn't tell you all. I couldn't

35:37

tell you.

35:38

You know what I draw these cities? Wish

35:41

yeah, wish. Well you know what I

35:43

just realized. No, the second

35:45

city, I'm telling you, the second city

35:48

is called that because it's like known as

35:50

like a second city. You didn't know that,

35:52

No, And I then I understood why there was also

35:54

one in Toronto, famously also a second

35:57

Sorryronto.

36:00

If I had to live in another city that wasn't New York,

36:02

it would be Toronto, really Toronto,

36:06

very cute case.

36:08

All the second cities have they

36:11

do Chicago and Toronto.

36:12

I would say San Francisco. That's not a

36:15

second city.

36:16

It is if you're like consultants,

36:19

I actually do. I'm looking for a consultant

36:22

for what. I don't want to say a bad word,

36:24

but one time a psychic told me that, oh,

36:27

is this the psychic that the community very

36:29

upset?

36:30

This is a different one.

36:31

Oh said that my my husband

36:34

is wearing a suit.

36:36

Well, that could be anything your husband

36:38

could.

36:39

It's Charlotte and it's psychic. It's

36:41

it's it's made up.

36:42

It's a suit, a hazmat suit

36:45

to get that dirty hole.

36:46

Hey you last

36:49

night Chinese. Hey,

36:53

that's my that's my people. That's Chinese

36:55

broccoli. Yeah, it's not actually Chinese,

36:57

is it.

36:57

It was a very very racist

37:00

of you to say, even more racist than what

37:02

you were saying right before you got on. You

37:04

came in here and you were saying a whole blow to racist

37:07

Chinese broccoli?

37:08

Is that what the bats were eating? And the wet market

37:11

that's you said? Oh yeah, I did say

37:13

that. I did say that. I was saying

37:15

that while I was peeing to myself.

37:17

Yeah, and I was bone was right there,

37:20

right there, and I was being what.

37:22

Was that guy's name, Larry something, hm

37:24

hmm. Guy who was.

37:25

Cruising the bat Larry Craig,

37:28

Larry we should I think

37:30

enough time has passed and that guy, you

37:32

know, his whole life was did he die? I think he

37:34

had? He is dead at this point. Let's call bathroom

37:37

cruising as a closeted man, Larry

37:39

Craig.

37:40

Larry craiging, have you ever

37:42

hooked up in a bathroom?

37:43

Yes?

37:44

Yes?

37:45

And by the way, because

37:48

I realized that I'm sorry about

37:50

this. We were doing our episode with Lipa

37:52

and you were telling the story and to many

37:54

times you have told you before, but I

37:57

did redirect the conversation in an irresponsible

37:59

and annoying, very Matt Rogers coated

38:01

way.

38:02

And so I want you to take the floor.

38:03

Tell us about how you add sex and Madrid Airport

38:05

bathroom.

38:06

That's the story. Okay, haven't have you?

38:09

No, I don't think I could

38:12

hygienic get hard.

38:13

Yeah, I don't think I could do that in a bathroom.

38:16

Yeah, because of the smells are because

38:18

of the awareness of other people's proximity.

38:22

I think growing up gay. Sorry, no,

38:25

go there, just to go there.

38:27

I just we'll

38:30

be right back. I

38:33

want what's best for everyone. Well

38:36

on second, yeah, we're back. Okay,

38:39

and will you were crying.

38:41

I'm I don't know, I don't I just

38:43

don't think I.

38:43

Can sure ideal place

38:46

for an encounter. Probably

38:50

country. I want a country. Okay, time

38:53

of day, I'm gonna say Canada. I'm

38:55

gonna say Toronto. A hotel room

38:57

in Toronto. Okay, we're being

38:59

stupid. We did not actually ask

39:01

you to expand on Toronto. What do you love about

39:03

it?

39:03

What? What makes it an adeal place? It's

39:06

not trying to be New York,

39:08

thank god.

39:09

No, this is my impression of Toronto.

39:12

Hey, we're

39:15

not New York. We've got a

39:17

couple of restaurants. Have

39:19

fun, yep, let us know.

39:20

If you need anything, bring your kids, don't

39:23

don't actually don't

39:25

bring your please whatever. It's six

39:28

of one. Yeah, we got a quote unquote

39:31

beach. It's just can

39:35

I tell you something? Don't ever sleep?

39:42

Wake up? There

39:46

needs to be a gay lake, and there

39:49

really is. There is epot

39:54

that's actually real culture.

39:55

Number two, There is a

39:57

lake that is one

39:59

of the gayest, but I'm saying there needs to be like

40:01

lake House culture for gay people. Yeah.

40:04

Yeah, the Germany Pavilion. I'm

40:08

so mad.

40:08

The most relaxing place on the Germany

40:11

Pavilion at Epcot. Go there, bring a beach

40:13

chair, have a sour kroud and it

40:15

fucking pills.

40:16

For the pills money, And that's where

40:18

I'm going to be all June. Okay for

40:21

relaxation Yang, Yeah,

40:23

well for Pride festivities Epcot.

40:26

Well, Trump's going on in the first week of Broadway.

40:28

Yeah, because Cole is still going to be an Epcot

40:30

col We keep trying to get you to come

40:32

to Disney with us.

40:33

Well we don't. Yes,

40:36

you never have. Well would you

40:38

do it? No? You don't like

40:40

it being

40:43

growing up?

40:46

Okay, back, you

40:49

just hate it on principle, that's not

40:51

true. You can say

40:54

BDS, Wow, I don't like

40:56

you two together. It's

41:00

too much.

41:02

I know, I know, too.

41:04

Much, too much.

41:06

Calm down, I

41:09

agree, Yeah, No, I bet I

41:11

would like it.

41:12

No, no, no, you don't have to say that. I think you would

41:14

because I think you'd see the irony in the whole thing.

41:17

John early and I once went to Disneyland.

41:20

Yeah, well.

41:23

It wasn't why but Splash

41:26

Mountain was fun and I wish we

41:28

both wish we would have, just like.

41:32

You can't anymore because they've renamed

41:34

it Princess Tati's by you dip.

41:36

It's the same. You still Splash very.

41:39

Much the same, but they've taken out everything that

41:42

you love, which was the racism. And you were saying

41:44

that before you got in the mic, and they replaced

41:46

it with Princess Tiana, because that's how you correct

41:49

the wrongs of the hills of the world.

41:51

Again. I said this when I was peeing

41:53

to myself as a joke and

41:55

we were both Larry Craig, and we were both Larry

41:57

Craig. Look, I was looking for sex with

41:59

closet did men? Of course

42:01

I was going to say that stuff.

42:03

Yeah, of course you were trying to attract

42:05

people.

42:05

Yes, please, please don't

42:08

get it twisted. I don't ever want to

42:10

get it twisted.

42:11

Can I say something?

42:12

I can't think of anything more embarrassing than getting

42:14

it twisted. The

42:16

loss another embarrassing thing, truly,

42:19

But like, what's more embarrassing than getting

42:21

it twisted?

42:22

What do you do first? Of all.

42:23

Ouch, how do you feel? Just

42:26

generally a lot better now? Honestly, I

42:28

was not in a good movie, and now I

42:30

really am. Okay, I'm very happy

42:32

to see you. Do you think you're going to have s

42:36

X with someone else?

42:37

Can I tell you something?

42:38

No, I did the thing. Sorry,

42:41

I did the thing. We'll be right back. I

42:44

did the thing where I

42:47

over scheduled

42:49

myself on dates this week. So it's actually

42:51

I'm going to reveal, okay that my guy canceled

42:53

tonight because I'm going on three dates this week with

42:55

three different men. Sorry, everyone, I'm actually

42:58

trying to find a partner actively. I

43:00

would like that for myself. I have recently,

43:02

you discovered about myself that I would like to be in

43:04

a relationship that's great.

43:05

And you're ready. I don't think

43:08

I am either, just ready and

43:10

it's two different thingships, right, Yeah,

43:13

yeah, somedays soon.

43:15

What do you?

43:15

Yeah?

43:16

What do you?

43:16

What do you think it'll take? I

43:19

think you too have to stop being friends.

43:21

Yeah, everyone's so intimidated by

43:23

him. True story. It's

43:26

just like I say, no, no,

43:28

he's creative. Lie, I go no, No.

43:30

He's great, he's easy, He's gonna love

43:33

you. Yeah, and then I go, then,

43:36

oh, mother in law over here, nothing's

43:39

good enough for her son.

43:40

The last two guys I've dated have been

43:42

like, I'm nervous to me Bowen, and

43:44

I was like, don't be nervous. He's my best friend

43:46

and the kind and the best person ever.

43:48

I was nervous to meet you.

43:50

Yeah, when did you meet forty

43:53

years ago?

43:54

Forty years ago?

43:55

Well, y'all did all

43:58

of Europe together?

43:59

Yeah?

44:00

It was eighty four eighty four and Berlin

44:03

was east and west, Oh my god, and

44:05

we didn't know which was which, and

44:07

so I was trying to buy jeans and

44:09

they and they said, we don't tell those here.

44:12

It was.

44:12

That was good, hilarious misunderstanding.

44:16

Yeah, well you were.

44:17

You were just saying before, but

44:20

you missed Germany the way it was,

44:23

that's what you were saying.

44:24

And you gave a specific year too.

44:30

God, we missed you,

44:32

Tony. It's

44:35

it's a fucking show.

44:36

And thank you did mean it actually

44:38

genuine there for a second said we missed

44:41

you. Yeah, we did say that,

44:43

though, I'm sorry, I'm embarrassed. Do

44:45

you not like to say hi to people after the show?

44:48

I love it? Yes? Good? Okay,

44:50

because we didn't like go backstage or anything. Well,

44:53

there's not a backstage at the lortel. Oh,

44:55

it's a theater moment. It's like you have to come

44:57

into the everyone clears out and the will

45:00

sort of stay behind and.

45:01

Yeah, yeah, the friends, the friends

45:04

can I reveal at this point that the the opening

45:06

night party at the hotel

45:08

run probably run was at Houston

45:10

Hall, which is a pretty very

45:13

straight there sports

45:15

on the sports on the screen, and I thought that was kind

45:17

of the perfect, perfect

45:19

touch.

45:20

I didn't see it the same way as you. Oh,

45:22

you were stressed out, you didn't like it.

45:24

I thought, change the channel. Yeah, totally

45:27

to listen to you when you said that, I didn't say

45:29

it to anyone. I just felt you thought it.

45:31

But it's a big it was your biggest that

45:34

was your first and biggest mistake. You

45:36

know what would be to play a bar Yeah,

45:39

QVC, I my qvcree.

45:45

Yeah, And that would drive business, which is what

45:47

you have.

45:48

You care about the economy,

45:50

absolutely jobs, bringing

45:53

jobs back to America,

45:56

all these companies.

45:58

There's nothing more American than QVC is actually

46:00

culture number ninety yeah eight, there's

46:02

nothing.

46:03

Nothing more American than PBC.

46:05

Because it's a conversation piece. You can

46:07

talk about it. You don't have to pay attention. It's

46:09

not like, oh well now

46:11

mama me is on, so I guess I'm gonna

46:14

watch it, which.

46:15

Is what I do. No, there is

46:17

no through line to follow with PVC.

46:20

No. Actually, in fact, there is

46:22

the absence of that completely, which

46:24

is why it's so great.

46:26

Peak behind the curtain to when I shot.

46:27

I love that for you the people that had to play,

46:30

the on air people, you just

46:32

have to be always talking.

46:34

Yeah, you literally it was.

46:35

It's actually so funny when you watch because they end

46:38

up saying some crazy things sometimes

46:41

just words together in like a soup that

46:43

truly are just like and look at this diamond

46:45

pendit now. I love this for graduations,

46:47

for funerals, for you know.

46:49

And my mother had a.

46:50

Pendant and I always remember my mother, especially

46:52

now today because Janine

46:55

is going to turn around and you can see the pennels in the

46:57

back. It's like nonsense, gobblede. It

46:59

doesn't matter, doesn't matter, it's nothing,

47:01

but it is everything.

47:02

If you can watch it on mute and

47:04

it still looks like things are happening, that is

47:07

the mark of success. That which I love,

47:09

and it gives you moments

47:11

like the planet Moon and the planet.

47:16

And yeah, the planet Moon liesa

47:19

lies.

47:19

Yeah. Also, you know what's really wild

47:22

is like actually they do watch

47:24

second by second to see if the sales are going

47:26

up and down, and it does correlate

47:28

to like how charming they're being,

47:30

Like, like, at any given time, there are a

47:32

million plus people watching this channel

47:35

and gauging second by second whether

47:37

they're buying something or not, to the point where,

47:39

like it actually corresponds

47:42

with the I guess salesman flopping

47:45

or not.

47:46

I love the economy, you said,

47:48

I love the economy. Yeah, I

47:50

love inflation. Keeping

47:53

up with those prices, yeah, keeping up with

47:56

the price. Yeah, we got to keep up with those prices.

47:58

Yeah.

47:58

Praise them a little bit and then give us something to

48:00

aspire to.

48:01

You know, was that the big conversation at

48:03

the MEP gala.

48:05

Can I get some water?

48:06

No?

48:07

No, no, no, no, don't

48:10

bring back anything you.

48:13

Like? Your job? Is my lawyer here? No?

48:16

Your lawyer's not here. Who's your lawyer?

48:18

You want to shout him out?

48:19

Yeah? Good, Elizabeth? I

48:22

bet she rocks Elsbeth, Elsbeth,

48:24

Elsbeth. Have you seen all the commercials for that show

48:26

Elsbeth.

48:27

No, but I really want to watch the show. It's supposed

48:29

to be good. Yeah, yeah, oh

48:33

yeah. I didn't watch The Good Fight. Neither

48:36

I should. Christine's mad at you? She

48:38

is? Have you met her? Christine were

48:40

talking about? No, she's mad at me?

48:42

Right, well,

48:44

I think we can because of all that stuff

48:46

you made up about me. What I said, like, I

48:48

didn't make anything else hard. It's

48:51

so funny that you try to come here on what is

48:54

our show?

48:55

Uh huh? Because even though we made a joke about

48:57

you hosting it interesting,

48:59

that's really interesting? Is it interesting?

49:02

It's interesting? I N C

49:04

h E R S T E E

49:07

N got it interesting?

49:09

Got it?

49:10

I think that.

49:12

Archie Pinjabi is having a moment again. Thoughts

49:15

where under the bridge? We'll

49:19

be right back.

49:30

And we're back.

49:31

Wait, what did she talk about York under the bridge?

49:33

Though I didn't go to bridge?

49:35

You didn't? Did you go to b York under the bridge?

49:37

They were working? Did what did she do

49:39

a concert? She did a concert? Slash

49:42

sat under the cabridge cambridge, but.

49:46

I think they call it the cabridge to sort

49:48

of insinuate that

49:51

use under the bridge, which.

49:53

I find to be there as an iconic sober

49:55

person. What do you think of that? I'm disturbed.

49:57

Yeah, well carefully. The table

50:00

is making noise, shaking

50:03

it, he's humping, he's

50:05

like a dog.

50:07

Don't think gay

50:10

people and drugs go together. I

50:12

actually agree. I think

50:14

let's just like put a let's put a pause

50:16

on it. Let's put a pause on it until I figure

50:18

it out what's going on.

50:21

I need to get in there.

50:22

No, Like, I'm busy with my show right

50:24

now. But like, if you trust

50:26

places, absolutely come fall. I

50:29

want to, like, I just want to open it up,

50:31

open the community up, and like, look

50:34

at it cool. If you were to

50:36

put out like a missive to

50:38

the to the community across the world

50:41

and say stop it with the

50:44

drugs for like.

50:45

A month, people would do it. I

50:48

don't think they would think love

50:51

drugs so much I'm going to do it in October.

50:56

Well then I'm gonna do it in October. Was there a

50:58

favorite drug back in the day? Just

51:00

weed? Yeah?

51:03

Just baking, just baking, waking

51:06

up in baking. It's

51:09

we call it wake and bake, and

51:12

we were really fun. Wake

51:15

and bake sucks.

51:16

It was awful. It's a really bad.

51:18

I'm sorry if you're awaken baker, No,

51:21

I just know awful.

51:22

It was like, no, yeah, it is.

51:25

It's a it's a huge alarm bell

51:27

moment. Yeah.

51:28

Once it becomes wake and bake, that's when

51:30

you have to stop and take uh

51:33

huh a second.

51:34

It's recess.

51:36

And I guess that's what we're saying to all the

51:38

gay community. Who's really the biggest problem

51:40

within the gay community is marijuana. Marijuana

51:43

use is out of control in the gay community. These

51:45

gays are two stone, Yeah, they

51:47

am out. Have

51:50

you noticed that Taylor Swift has started

51:53

to talk about weed a lot in her

51:55

music? Has she yes?

51:56

In her like The Tortured

51:59

Posts Department.

52:00

Is an album about a chaotic, manic relationship,

52:02

and she references like you always

52:05

being she was with someone that was always stoned. My

52:08

friends smell like weed, et cetera.

52:10

That Yeah, you know what I mean, Like, there's

52:12

a reed. What

52:14

do you like to say? I don't know, because

52:16

you have I don't

52:18

like pot at all. You know what I say you,

52:22

I don't care what pot

52:25

marijuana.

52:26

It's all pretty bad. It's all bad.

52:27

I think reefer is funny because it's stupid. Green flower

52:30

yeah, never flower.

52:32

Yeah, Bowen

52:38

go to bed. I've never seen you do that

52:40

bed. Your tongue fell out of your mouth

52:43

goes.

52:46

Sually.

52:47

I'm sexual. You are a sexual rimming

52:49

the air eats

52:52

every you know what. I stopped?

52:55

Yeah, I got, yeah,

52:58

I had, I mean six months. I

53:01

was like, oh, I guess my stomach's

53:03

just weird. Now this is a great story.

53:05

You'll want to put this in the book.

53:07

Okay, And it's coming up right after the

53:09

break. I'm back. Hi.

53:11

I went to a dietician for my

53:13

acid reflux and they

53:16

ran all these tests and they said, here, you

53:18

need to poop in this jar and mail it

53:20

in. I said, no

53:23

questions, absolutely, I'll

53:25

do that for you.

53:26

Take my poop.

53:27

Take hey, you take it.

53:30

And what they what they make you do

53:33

is like put a bag like

53:35

a little you tape basically

53:38

a piece of paper onto your toilet sto

53:40

oh.

53:41

Yes, yes, and you poop onto that paper and

53:43

then they give you a little scooper yep too.

53:45

I hope everyone at.

53:46

Home is eating a nice big chocolate cake right

53:48

now. And you scoop the poop and

53:50

you put it into a little cup

53:54

and you mail that in.

53:56

Yeah to I think the government.

53:58

The government and said what they do with

54:00

the cup, They they they

54:03

clean Mama again,

54:07

I hope you're eating chocolate cake, eating

54:09

chocolate cake right now? It's poopoo?

54:12

Is it poop? And is

54:16

it poop? Okay?

54:17

So then they came out so well,

54:19

then I met with a dietician and

54:21

she goes, have

54:25

you been camping recently?

54:28

And I was like, no, I

54:31

haven't been camping since I was twelve. What

54:33

what kind of weird question is that?

54:35

And she was like, you have this parasite

54:38

that is common with people

54:40

who've maybe been drink camping, drinking

54:43

contaminated water.

54:45

Or from and

54:48

does she get there set yeah, yeah, yeah.

54:50

And then I was like oh and.

54:52

Then, but so the

54:54

process of confirming

54:57

that you have jaradia in order to get

54:59

the.

55:01

Is there's like mailing in your poop.

55:03

Yeah, And I'm like, I don't want to be

55:05

mailing my poop, like I'm

55:07

leaving that behind. I said,

55:09

no more, no more, ask four,

55:12

I'm not mailing my poop anyhow, I

55:15

said, New Year knew me, no

55:17

poop. I am not going to that mailbox with the jar

55:20

of poop.

55:20

Now, that's completely insane

55:22

that that's how Yeah, yeah, well

55:25

I've had it before and it hasn't stopped

55:28

me.

55:28

Yeah, but it was horrible

55:30

and I got it on Fire Island and you

55:33

saw me. Yeah, it was bad. It was not good.

55:36

You you like watched him? Yeah we

55:39

shared a room. No,

55:42

but I but I watched you get your ass? Was I really?

55:44

You know you didn't. Don't tell them that. I

55:46

don't want to think about us like that.

55:48

No, I was insinuating that

55:50

you were watching him have like explosive

55:52

diary.

55:53

Oh I thought you were insinuing that I was watching him.

55:55

Isn't that funny? House are sharing the bed? When

55:57

were we sharing the bed when I had to keep getting up?

56:00

Yes, we were, and we all sewed the bad the

56:03

only only only time I've

56:05

ever and it was bad, like we both

56:07

had like growing up moments.

56:08

And the only time I've ever blacked out. Oh

56:11

from the fourth of July were like they found

56:13

my wallet on the boardwalk and it was this unity

56:17

effort.

56:18

It was the only time you ever blacked out.

56:20

Good for you?

56:20

Yeah, really, I would say so. I didn't

56:22

really ever black out in college or high school.

56:26

Hmmm, you sound like you don't believe me.

56:28

No, I'm trying to go through the rolodex in my

56:30

mind to think of times I've seen Bowen Yang sloppy.

56:33

It was so scary because I've never like

56:36

had like a black box in the memory of like, oh I

56:38

don't remember what happened.

56:39

Well, we got your back, the wallet, got.

56:41

Me back the wallet, and thank god

56:44

because a lot of I hope everybody's

56:46

credit cards. Because this goes

56:49

back to what I was saying about health.

56:51

Yeah, you were saying that

56:54

right before we got on. Yeah, you were saying you hope

56:56

COVID comes back, Yes, yeah, stronger

57:03

because like it like a gay Yeah,

57:05

it over promised. You

57:08

think COVID under delivered.

57:11

Compared to what.

57:14

Compared to what compared

57:16

to what? That's a really good season

57:19

two specific I

57:21

know. I'm sorry, I guess compared to difficult

57:24

people.

57:25

Okay, are you? Yes?

57:27

Yeah? Did you find something

57:30

ever?

57:30

Come on, You're right, I shouldn't even go there.

57:33

Did you ever find something since Downton Abbey

57:35

that you liked as much?

57:37

Yes? What Gilded

57:40

Age? I was always.

57:44

Like Sideline, Like I was Sideline,

57:46

We're going to take a break and not come back. We're

57:50

back, We're back the Waltons.

57:53

I don't think I know that? Is that about

57:55

the Walton family. Yeah, no,

57:58

no, no, no, no no, they're a family named the Waltons.

58:00

And it's not like the Walmart Walton because

58:03

you were saying you love Walmart

58:06

and the family that that. I

58:08

love how I love their business model? Like

58:11

why why is that controversial

58:13

to say? Like, right, they're doing very

58:15

well? Why are there on

58:18

Broadway? Why shouldn't I be proud of them? And yes, they're

58:20

funding O Mary on Broadway? Yeah, and I'm very

58:22

proud of them. Yeah, Like let's

58:25

see what they're doing is legal? Yes, like.

58:28

Yeah, they're cutting corners, they're underpaying,

58:31

Like it's legal. If you have a

58:33

problem with them, take it up with your

58:36

president, Joe Biden, the one you both

58:38

wanted so bad.

58:39

We did want so bad. We

58:42

really did.

58:43

Yeah, we really did

58:45

it. I didn't, I wrote,

58:48

I wrote in. I wrote

58:50

in, uh uh

58:53

Judy Garlic? Yeah,

58:58

where is she'll hitting

59:00

the trail?

59:00

Will she?

59:01

She's in? She

59:04

came, she was like, I have been wanted

59:06

to be on this podcast. She's

59:09

like, I want to talk about health in the gay

59:12

I bet she does. Jardia.

59:16

My husband has jardia. You

59:19

can't get rid of it. Jared

59:22

Jared, Hey, Cush, We

59:24

can't give him a cool name.

59:26

No, that's not cool, that's not cool. Jake Cush

59:29

cush it well even Cush terrible

59:31

weed name. Yeah, we don't

59:33

like that, don Ja. What about Gonjo?

59:36

No, it's bad, but we

59:39

really haven't come up with something good. Molly's

59:43

Molly's so good.

59:45

I think funny. Who has Reefer?

59:47

I love it? Let's go smoke reefer? You

59:50

love it that Matt says it in a fun way,

59:53

Griefer, Let's smoke a reefer. I

59:55

got Jared be saying it to not Kushner, Jared

59:57

Frieder.

59:58

J fried I'm looking

1:00:00

at you like I'm not sure,

1:00:03

Like I'm a crazy guy and you're a crazy

1:00:05

guy. I love

1:00:09

kissing James every night. You

1:00:12

tell us yes, wait, we share

1:00:14

a leading man, romantic

1:00:19

romantic lead. I'm sorry. I was my brain not

1:00:22

what it used to be. It's okay.

1:00:24

I think it's going to get all the time. I

1:00:26

think you're getting smarter every day and stronger. Yeah,

1:00:30

I gotta say, well, i'd love

1:00:32

to read. I'm reading

1:00:34

books again. We're taking a European

1:00:36

trip, and Bowen described

1:00:38

the desire to read,

1:00:41

and I thought that that sounded so boring.

1:00:44

Yeah, I would go for

1:00:46

depression. It was so it was really

1:00:49

good for the bad moment that last

1:00:51

summer m H was I. I was probably

1:00:53

even boring you to death with it. I was just like I've been reading

1:00:55

a lot. No, the thing is like

1:00:58

you actually and this is the

1:01:00

scary part. You

1:01:02

did not seem different at all.

1:01:04

That is terri lying because

1:01:07

it was lying. No.

1:01:10

The bad moment was like in

1:01:13

London.

1:01:13

And I was like, I have to go somewhere. I

1:01:16

can't be like, I can't be here for I'm

1:01:18

sorry, I keep shaking the table. And then by

1:01:20

this that by the time I was in another place and I was

1:01:22

among friends or a friend

1:01:25

was like, this is much better.

1:01:27

So you were lying or wait what are you saying?

1:01:29

Yeah, you were lying. I was

1:01:31

lying.

1:01:31

By the time you got this is not real

1:01:34

and you and you were saying that sorry,

1:01:37

uh no, we're back. No you really didn't

1:01:39

seem that's terrifying. That's

1:01:42

terrifying. Do you talk to anyone?

1:01:44

No? Yeah?

1:01:45

Yeah, Are you both in therapy

1:01:48

like for real?

1:01:49

Yes?

1:01:49

With each other?

1:01:50

With each other?

1:01:51

You know what I just started doing what E

1:01:53

M D R. Controversial

1:01:56

is a controversial?

1:01:57

Controversial?

1:01:58

Well, I can't wait to hear everyone's opinion on it.

1:02:01

What I really cannot wait for is

1:02:03

for everyone in our beloved community

1:02:06

to tell me, yeah, how I should.

1:02:08

Be doing well?

1:02:09

No, but I didn't mean to undercut.

1:02:12

What is controversial about it that killed John

1:02:14

Benet? It

1:02:18

was emdr that did it. Yeah, wah,

1:02:21

controversial. I think it's just I think it's a relatively new

1:02:23

form of therapy. Okay, It's like there's a lot of deband

1:02:26

it killed John Bennet. Wow,

1:02:32

that's the comedy

1:02:35

podcast can be

1:02:37

funny?

1:02:39

Ship God, you said before

1:02:41

you came on here, you killed her?

1:02:42

So what the fuck?

1:02:44

Oh my god? In the burping?

1:02:48

What was that?

1:02:50

The parents? No? No, no, the guy that that killed

1:02:52

his wife? What's it called that documentary?

1:02:55

And then he was oh drink No,

1:02:59

no, it's the drinks? Or was the

1:03:02

murder in Boston?

1:03:02

No?

1:03:03

No, no, that guy that like he he killed

1:03:05

his wife?

1:03:07

Huh.

1:03:07

And then he was like in a bathroom on a live

1:03:09

mic going pe and he's like, of course

1:03:11

I killed them. Oh have

1:03:14

you guys seen what Jennifer did? No,

1:03:17

what's what Jennifer Did's on Netflex. It's like,

1:03:20

truly the most.

1:03:21

It hits hard because it hits

1:03:23

close to home for me because it is this Asian girl

1:03:25

who felt so pressured by her parents to

1:03:28

succeed that.

1:03:28

She killed them kill So

1:03:31

that hit home for you. What you

1:03:33

just said on the mic. It wasn't like Cole who

1:03:36

said all the nasty thing.

1:03:38

No, this is on Mike.

1:03:39

I'm saying, no, not that I relate to her killing

1:03:42

her wanting to kill her parents or killing her parents.

1:03:44

It is this thing of like she must have felt

1:03:47

like it's like, y'all, if things

1:03:49

did not go a certain way, like I

1:03:51

would have been, I would have killed

1:03:54

So I would have like been

1:03:57

like in that kind of like you're

1:04:00

saying, you get it. Yeah,

1:04:03

you could have seen yourself going down. No, not

1:04:06

yet her parents, but oh my god, this is so crazy.

1:04:09

That watched the

1:04:11

Mother's Day episode that I said all the other night that said,

1:04:13

oh look but ones mom, that could have

1:04:15

turned out really different. I'm saying, I'm

1:04:18

like my life turned out.

1:04:21

It was so many things aligning and

1:04:24

it was this. No, I

1:04:26

think what you're saying is very cogent.

1:04:28

I think this is good.

1:04:30

I think you're not saying I wanted to kill You're

1:04:32

saying you understand the circumstances in which

1:04:35

this girl did. You're saying you identify

1:04:37

with, sympathize with, and trust her.

1:04:40

I need to be president. You

1:04:42

wantump on Broadway acting and

1:04:45

this girl president. What Jennifer did

1:04:47

was slay.

1:04:48

She was like a compulsive She lied

1:04:51

about like going to school because like her parents,

1:04:53

like it was.

1:04:54

It was so crazy. I love liars.

1:04:56

I do have to tell you. Last night I watched the Lisa

1:04:59

ren A Lifetime movie Mommy Meaness. You

1:05:02

gotta get into it. It's good.

1:05:03

It's based on a true story. It's about

1:05:05

a mother who terrorizes her

1:05:08

daughter to like control her by

1:05:10

texting her like horrible vicious

1:05:12

things from several burner phones.

1:05:15

This is based on a true story. And Rena

1:05:18

is just like, well, I don't understand what's

1:05:20

happening, like what it was, and she goes

1:05:22

in the goes in her closet, sits down on her computer

1:05:25

and just.

1:05:26

And so

1:05:29

so good.

1:05:31

Yeah, the soaps really like get people

1:05:33

like Julianne Morcule and Meg

1:05:35

Ryan came from soaps.

1:05:37

Who else there's there's like a famous Oh Margot

1:05:39

Robbie was Australian neighbors.

1:05:42

Yeah, uh uh huh, isn't that what it's called

1:05:44

neighbors. And I believe Chris Hemsworth was

1:05:47

also on that, and maybe even Kylie

1:05:49

Minogue back in the day. Kylie Minogue was definitely

1:05:51

on a soap back. Shout

1:05:53

out to Kylie Minogue. Just saw her in Vegas.

1:05:55

That was a great congrats by the way, thank you. I

1:06:00

rolls him right back.

1:06:01

Okay, Yeah, isn't

1:06:03

that's any Frankel in a Last Time movie?

1:06:06

She is.

1:06:07

And it's another thing where it's like I have a daughter

1:06:09

and it's weird. It's they really

1:06:11

are pivoting to like it's

1:06:13

me against my daughter.

1:06:15

Yes, a lot.

1:06:16

And you know what was was so I love

1:06:19

about this movie was like it literally just

1:06:21

ends with Lisa. We're gonna spoiler alert. She just

1:06:23

like gets caught and she doesn't

1:06:25

even like change. She's just like, well

1:06:27

I did it because I want us

1:06:30

to be close friends. And

1:06:32

the daughter's like, you're a fucking crazy

1:06:35

person. She goes to jail for two days,

1:06:37

gets out, and then the daughter moves out.

1:06:38

That's it.

1:06:39

There's like, no, there's no campy

1:06:41

fight, there's no anything. I

1:06:43

mean, it's gypsy, It's gypsy. It's Trump

1:06:46

and Gypsy. Yeah, I think I think we found

1:06:48

it right off the bat. It is Trump and Gypsy.

1:06:54

What is it gonna be? It's

1:06:57

just kind of giving, like what's that bear yogi?

1:07:00

You'll get it's kind of Yeah,

1:07:04

everybody loves Ruben.

1:07:07

That's really good.

1:07:12

Can you do, Patty Heaton?

1:07:17

Why do Kelsey Grammar and I get

1:07:19

ostracized for being Republicans?

1:07:22

It's actually a really good question. Why why.

1:07:25

It's just their beliefs.

1:07:26

It's just their beliefs.

1:07:29

Will be right back and we're

1:07:31

back. What would you host a talk show? Yes,

1:07:34

because I I feel like Broadway

1:07:37

is over. Well

1:07:39

it's over, but I feel like there is something that you got

1:07:41

to be. You guys got to be careful because this is my community.

1:07:44

Now you're right Broadway

1:07:47

is I think for you?

1:07:49

Is this fair to say? It's like the goal?

1:07:52

It is?

1:07:52

It was always the goal.

1:07:53

Yeah, the secret dream in the back of my mind

1:07:55

was always like, that's so cool, Well how

1:07:57

do I get to Broadway?

1:07:59

Yeah? This could not have happened. Everyone

1:08:01

thinks I'm joking. No, no, no, I don't think fuck

1:08:04

you. Oh sorry, I.

1:08:06

Don't mean it's okay, ugly,

1:08:09

It's like because like, because I remember you saying

1:08:11

this to me. It's the last and then last er we're talking about it afterwards,

1:08:14

were like, oh, that's so cool, Like it's it's amazing,

1:08:16

Like I feel like I thought every gay

1:08:18

person was always just secretly like

1:08:21

wanting to be on Broadway?

1:08:24

Don't you think a little bit have that dream?

1:08:27

Not quite as much as you guys, but I think yes,

1:08:29

I've like had like the flash of the Fantis.

1:08:32

You will no no no, no, no no no for me. It's

1:08:34

just like I don't think that's like Frost

1:08:36

Nixon that

1:08:39

actually would be good.

1:08:39

I'm Nixon, I think so I think

1:08:41

you have a better Nixon. I'm oh,

1:08:45

my god, better

1:08:47

than your Trump.

1:08:51

Who is that? I can't wait to get that.

1:08:54

It's sort of like who is It's

1:08:57

like you doing fallon doing.

1:08:59

It's like a cartoon villain, like

1:09:02

like I can't it's not Jaffar, it's

1:09:06

almost Jaffar.

1:09:07

To get back on track.

1:09:08

It's very cool that

1:09:10

you're doing Broadway and is the fantasy to

1:09:12

stay there the rest of your life?

1:09:15

I would like to keep working in theater.

1:09:18

Why just twelve weeks?

1:09:21

I work with a numerologist who she's

1:09:25

very powerful, this woman, her

1:09:28

shoulders are so broad do you think it's

1:09:31

because of the numerology. Yeah,

1:09:33

she's got this kind of sexy kind of oh

1:09:37

like yeah, she's got this sexy gate. She

1:09:40

just walks real bow legged. Yeah,

1:09:42

and I love her. And she said twelve.

1:09:45

Yeah. She looked at me and she said twelve

1:09:49

Is it actually the goal for you?

1:09:51

Like, because I saw you talking about this on Stradio Lab

1:09:53

like someone else would do it.

1:09:55

I would love for someone else to play Mary.

1:09:57

Really yeah, And do you think

1:09:59

would you want like some like a

1:10:02

list person to drop in and like, I.

1:10:04

Don't care as long as they're like I would want

1:10:06

them to be like good. Yeah,

1:10:08

my dream is Titus Burgess.

1:10:11

Oh god, Like

1:10:14

in a way that almost would make me be like,

1:10:16

wait, maybe you're too good.

1:10:18

Don't don't it wouldn't It wouldn't

1:10:21

be that be different, That's what I was gonna say. But

1:10:23

that would be good and it's like thrilling, but.

1:10:25

Like yeah, imagine, imagine totally

1:10:27

yeah, yeah, And I can picture

1:10:30

how Titus this wig would be different too, like

1:10:32

the stupid curls.

1:10:34

Have you had so many conversations with people

1:10:36

where they they cast it at you?

1:10:39

No? Really, no, why do

1:10:41

you want to start?

1:10:42

Sure? I mean frankly,

1:10:44

you'd be great. No, yeah, no, I

1:10:46

wouldn't. But you don't think i'd be

1:10:48

good as Mary?

1:10:51

Hey, No, I'm

1:10:53

thinking I think you'd be a good Mary's teacher.

1:10:56

Yeah you have you have, you have the skull.

1:10:58

If I had to cast you

1:11:00

and the show, it would be as I had

1:11:03

to if I had gun

1:11:06

to my head, leading man, gun

1:11:08

to my head, I would just tell them to shoot. But

1:11:14

I would say I can't cast Matt in this

1:11:16

show. I would say, just shoot me. But

1:11:21

no, don't actually feel bad for me.

1:11:23

That makes it real, you monster, don't

1:11:25

be like this is my friend breaking down,

1:11:28

crying, weeping.

1:11:30

God, damn it. Well, I really

1:11:32

are driving us apart. I really.

1:11:34

I was thinking if

1:11:37

Bowen's Mary, then I would want

1:11:39

you to be Mary's teacher, I think. But

1:11:42

I can also see a world where you're Mary, and

1:11:44

your aid I

1:11:46

would love to see. I think I'm better cast

1:11:49

his abe. You put all your little

1:11:51

Asian guys as.

1:11:51

Abe, don't you.

1:11:52

Yeah you were saying earlier, Yeah,

1:11:56

yeah, I do not

1:11:59

to put her, not because of Titus,

1:12:01

and it's like such a within that circle.

1:12:03

But like I think House, I was just gonna say,

1:12:05

like, yeah, I mean,

1:12:08

oh my god, wouldn't Sedaris want to do it?

1:12:10

Absolutely?

1:12:11

God should be amazing. But

1:12:14

I would love to write plays. I

1:12:16

would love to keep writing plays and other people

1:12:19

to be in. I mean, what's

1:12:21

what's very cool is that. I think it's

1:12:24

like, at this point, you just get to do anything

1:12:27

and everything. I don't know, can

1:12:29

we be The industry is really

1:12:32

amazing, That's true. The industries

1:12:34

are really amazing right now. Everyone's

1:12:38

really excited and everyone is happy.

1:12:41

Earnestly.

1:12:42

Yeah, no, one deserves it more. Yeah,

1:12:45

nobody deserves it more. Fuck

1:12:48

no, because I'm not doing this. This

1:12:50

is you are not the host of this podcast, my

1:12:52

podcast, And sometimes it gets earnest thanks.

1:12:56

I think that word thought, Yeah,

1:12:58

well deserve Oh sure,

1:13:01

because we all deserve. Of course, everything

1:13:03

deserves you.

1:13:08

You are you are the sister,

1:13:10

you never have whatever,

1:13:16

you know, You're our idol. Yes stopping,

1:13:19

I mean it is perfect.

1:13:21

It's also I mean, watching the

1:13:23

show, it's the best thing that's ever happened

1:13:25

to me in my whole life, this show being

1:13:27

produced. And I'm trying

1:13:30

to like soak up everything that's

1:13:33

that's happening right now because I know soon

1:13:36

my turn will be over.

1:13:37

And that's fine. All our turn. We all get

1:13:40

a turn, and we get to the back of the line,

1:13:42

and we wait and we wait and we wait, and then we get our turn.

1:13:44

Well you got to get fast passed.

1:13:45

This is why you need to go to you every

1:13:49

line. Yeah, okay, fine, I'll

1:13:51

go to Epcot honestly.

1:13:54

One day days time we're

1:13:56

on like one of our eight day trips.

1:13:58

Here's why I wouldn't go. I don't

1:14:00

want to be on a plane about it. I

1:14:05

don't want to take a plane about it, you know. But

1:14:08

I don't want to go to the airport, get

1:14:10

on a plane, be at the airport,

1:14:12

get my luggage all for Epcot.

1:14:15

Like if I was in shore wherever, where

1:14:17

is it? Orlando

1:14:20

exactly? And I if

1:14:22

I was in Orlando, I would love mary

1:14:24

down in Orlando. Yes, liars,

1:14:29

both of you smell it. I smell it

1:14:32

seeping out of your pores. The lies.

1:14:34

But the weed, the weed, the

1:14:37

marijuana, the pot, YouTube

1:14:40

pot smokers. I've had enough of YouTube pot

1:14:42

smokers.

1:14:42

I've had enough of us. But

1:14:45

I would I would go to Epcot if I was in Orlando

1:14:48

already.

1:14:48

All right, okay, so we just have to figure out

1:14:50

a way to trap me in Orlando,

1:14:53

entrapman Central Florida. I

1:14:56

do it, we can do it.

1:14:57

What's that face for?

1:14:59

I don't know.

1:15:01

I don't know if I could do it. I don't know

1:15:03

about like really

1:15:05

Florida in general. The

1:15:08

hell of a drug. But yeah,

1:15:10

you do have to kind of go there to go to Disney

1:15:12

World. So that's I guess where we're rubbing it. It's just

1:15:15

it's the plane, correct, the airports.

1:15:18

You don't like to fly.

1:15:19

I don't like it.

1:15:21

It's very scary. Yeah, because

1:15:24

growing up there, Okay, I

1:15:27

just like I

1:15:30

never got to soar.

1:15:33

And to be that high.

1:15:35

Like it's like, mme

1:15:39

everything it reminds me of like what I

1:15:42

didn't get growing up.

1:15:44

And I'm

1:15:46

sorry, I have to go. Pooper really bad. We'll

1:15:50

be right back.

1:16:00

Are you pooping a lot?

1:16:02

I do poop a lot?

1:16:03

That's good, Yeah, you poop

1:16:05

a lot.

1:16:05

Hmm. I'm a vegan.

1:16:07

M So all of this really supports

1:16:10

the idea that I've had, which is that coal

1:16:14

not to actually earnestly get on health.

1:16:16

But I find you to be very healthy. Thank

1:16:18

you for saying that.

1:16:19

Overall, it's one of my main initiatives

1:16:21

going to Broadway. Make Broadway healthy

1:16:23

again, Bring healthy back, Bring health back to

1:16:25

Broadway. People think, oh,

1:16:27

capitalism's ruining theater

1:16:30

because ticket prices are right.

1:16:32

I think we eat right mm

1:16:35

hmm, we get the good eight

1:16:37

hours of sleep we need. Yeah, finances

1:16:40

will catch up well

1:16:43

because you eat, like, don't sleep well. You don't

1:16:45

sleep well. I stay up every night till

1:16:48

five am. Seriously, Yeah, no matter

1:16:50

what, what time do you get up? If

1:16:52

I'm on my own, I'll wake up at like

1:16:55

if I have nowhere to be.

1:16:56

Yeah. Three. Really, so

1:16:59

you're nocturnal. Nocturnal always

1:17:01

happen? Does that bother you

1:17:03

that you don't see the morning? Yes?

1:17:07

What do we do?

1:17:08

I don't know? Birding? Birding,

1:17:11

birding? Like when this this?

1:17:16

Oh you want to like go like look at the bird.

1:17:18

I've thought about that because I need a hobby. It's

1:17:21

actually, do you bird? I've started

1:17:23

to app. I have an app.

1:17:26

Merlin is the one that the Cornell Institute

1:17:28

of Ornithology or whatever, like they have a department.

1:17:30

Oh, they're really problematic. Actually, because

1:17:33

you're the president. You were saying before, you're

1:17:35

gonna and that's been your mission. Yeah,

1:17:38

to problematize, to kill the birds. Kill

1:17:43

the birds.

1:17:46

Verry.

1:17:46

Well, I mean it's interesting because that's that

1:17:49

feeds into my I don't think so.

1:17:50

Oh you sang that song

1:17:52

at Queer's Live I did

1:17:55

means a lot to me again that we

1:17:58

should do it again.

1:18:00

This means a lot to me that you came to the show. Thank you.

1:18:03

Really, what if we did Queers Live at like Radio

1:18:05

City Music Hall? Yeah, let's do it, do

1:18:07

it? They offer, Actually we're offered

1:18:09

a show at this other thing. Maybe we should do

1:18:11

Maybe we should do that.

1:18:12

That's fun, that could be really fun or Orlando,

1:18:15

and then that's what we get. Yeah.

1:18:16

Yeah, if you can get me to Orlando for

1:18:18

a gig, I'll go to Epicot with you. Okay, but

1:18:21

really quickly I've gone burning for oh

1:18:24

yeah, for for just like and for curiosity.

1:18:27

So much fun. Where do you go with the parks?

1:18:29

Prospect Park a veil of Kashmir so literally like historic

1:18:32

cruising spot, but it is the best spot for birding.

1:18:34

It's so funny. Sure, yeah,

1:18:38

something to peckers.

1:18:40

I was just looking for a bird thing.

1:18:43

I know.

1:18:43

I've got Chardia. This character

1:18:46

is a caricature.

1:18:48

It's so fun.

1:18:49

Get a nice pair of binoculars. And then you go you go in

1:18:51

the mornings, and it's all much were they How

1:18:54

much were they the binoculars? I

1:18:56

actually.

1:18:58

I'm about a mid price, Like I mean,

1:19:00

they do go crazy like eighty bucks.

1:19:03

Oh my god, they're

1:19:05

expensive. Yeah, I bought one for eighty

1:19:07

bucks. And then but then you go there, it's all these old women,

1:19:10

but the activity itself is free. And the old

1:19:12

women there compared to boomer

1:19:16

how about that generational you can't okay.

1:19:18

And then in

1:19:21

a group, well, there's it seems like there's there's

1:19:23

a lot of walks.

1:19:23

There's like a queer birding group, and there's like you know,

1:19:25

like whatever, like different beer birding group, queer birding

1:19:28

groups already redunded.

1:19:30

But then there's like

1:19:32

all these guys with cameras. But it's it's like nice. It's like

1:19:34

you get all types and it's free. And the camera guys,

1:19:37

God makes me so horny.

1:19:40

I love guys with camera, Oh my

1:19:42

god.

1:19:44

And it's it's just four different people telling

1:19:46

you like there's this Scarlett Tanneger today.

1:19:49

Oh, like they're they're like pointing it out to you, or

1:19:51

it's like they're politely being like you see, there's a there's

1:19:53

a nutatt today. It's so sweet. It's

1:19:55

very standing. I heard, I heard,

1:19:58

and then no, no, no it's

1:20:00

not, and then and then I'm sorry. Looking

1:20:02

at a bird up close in the binoculars

1:20:05

in three D space as the lights hitting it, it is like

1:20:07

incredible. Yeah, and that sounds more

1:20:09

healthy than like gambling totally,

1:20:12

but it's the same. It feeds the same, and it feeds

1:20:14

the same if like I want to I want to win, I want to

1:20:16

catch. Yes the thing and it's like all you're

1:20:18

doing is looking at a bird. You're

1:20:20

looking at a bird, and then you think,

1:20:23

oh, is that gonna hurt exactly?

1:20:26

It's maybe the race. They

1:20:28

want their privacy.

1:20:30

It's one of those things.

1:20:31

It's one of those hobbies where I'm like, why the fuck do people

1:20:33

get into this? And then you do it once and you're like, oh,

1:20:36

I get it. I'm promised. And it

1:20:38

seems like it would be something fun to

1:20:41

add to traveling, Like

1:20:43

if you're traveling and you're like, ooh, I'm going to see what kind

1:20:45

of birds they have here?

1:20:47

A big yellow, a big yellow. Oh, the

1:20:49

big yellow.

1:20:49

Oh.

1:20:50

I I went to Canada and I saw

1:20:52

all the big yellow I'm

1:20:55

genuinely excited to do that. Yeah, when I go, this

1:20:57

will loop back.

1:20:58

Around to activity. I can't because

1:21:00

of color blindness.

1:21:01

No, I am color blind as well. You

1:21:03

actually are, I am. I can't tell

1:21:06

the difference between green and brown

1:21:08

a lot of the time.

1:21:09

Neither can I. Yeah, it's because you're red green color

1:21:11

blind, right, And so when I was a kid,

1:21:13

I would color the tree. Sorry, okay,

1:21:18

I would color the trunks

1:21:20

of the trees green and the leaves

1:21:23

brown, and I would get points

1:21:25

knocked off. Yeah, minus

1:21:28

two and

1:21:30

there were only there's only yeah, like

1:21:32

ten points.

1:21:33

My sister I used to think she had green

1:21:35

hair all my life, Yeah, because she had brown hair

1:21:37

and it looked green to me.

1:21:39

And I thought peanut butter was green.

1:21:41

I probably still do, to be honest.

1:21:43

Blue and purple and peach possible, sometimes

1:21:47

weird ones like orange.

1:21:48

Have you ever worn those glasses? Yes, but

1:21:50

they're a scam. I

1:21:52

never tried them. I was gonna say, like, oh, that would

1:21:54

have been a fun thing for us to do today, but

1:21:56

they're a scam.

1:21:58

Honestly, my we did a secret SAMD and

1:22:01

my one friend got me those colors,

1:22:03

those glasses, and it ended up being like I

1:22:05

put them on, and I'm like, well, if

1:22:07

this is what everyone sees normally, it's

1:22:09

hell yeah, and yeah, I

1:22:11

just thought, because you know, they're like those red

1:22:14

glasses.

1:22:15

I just saw like red, like I didn't

1:22:17

see anything, no new. I

1:22:19

wonder if they bought the cheap

1:22:22

ones or something. I mean, certainly, who

1:22:24

is this friend? Name them Chrish likeer like

1:22:27

Chris, you cheap bastard.

1:22:29

But also he got me a like

1:22:32

a set, though at the same time it wasn't the only

1:22:34

gift he got me, like a like a shirt was it

1:22:36

like a So.

1:22:37

You're a spoiled little your daddy's spoiled

1:22:39

brat. Yes, yes, yes, always

1:22:42

have been, always will be. Yeah, never will change.

1:22:44

Never brat.

1:22:45

I love a brat. It's so fun. Mary's

1:22:48

kind of a brat. I love, Yeah, total.

1:22:50

Brattle brat, total

1:22:52

brady girl.

1:22:54

I'm a brat. I know that about

1:22:57

you. Yeah.

1:22:58

They demanded a very nice hotel room,

1:23:01

did the Amsterdam and I gave it? Yeah,

1:23:04

the sofa teltel.

1:23:06

Do we get breakfast the next day? Yeah?

1:23:10

Great breakfast. I lost there.

1:23:12

I think maybe my favorite city that's

1:23:16

Adam Breakfast

1:23:18

Amsterdam, London's great kid

1:23:21

naming cities.

1:23:22

Well, I like, I forgot

1:23:24

the rest. I love

1:23:26

the actually tucky. I

1:23:28

like California Atlantic

1:23:32

Ocean.

1:23:33

It's time for I don't think so, honey. Just

1:23:35

before our friend really embarrassed

1:23:38

him, I'm in a cave. I'm

1:23:40

doing a thing with a cup in the cave.

1:23:42

It's a visual medium. You look silly. We

1:23:45

got cameras since you've last been on No

1:23:48

this is I don't think so honey. One thing hasn't

1:23:50

changed. One thing hasn't changed. We

1:23:53

still do this goddamn segment. Okay,

1:23:56

I don't think so wanty. We ran against

1:23:58

something in pop culture that's not so great

1:24:00

to us. And I had an experience this weekend

1:24:03

and I would like to talk about.

1:24:03

Okay, tough, tough couple of days

1:24:06

for my girl. This is Matt Rodgers.

1:24:08

I don't think so many as time starts now.

1:24:09

I don't think so, honey. If you show up to a theme party

1:24:12

and you don't have anything on

1:24:14

that's the theme.

1:24:15

Maybe they're coming from work and it's.

1:24:16

No, I tell you something, stop

1:24:19

it, okay, because I haven't even been and I

1:24:21

hadn't even been doing that for ten seconds, and you sided

1:24:23

with all of them, and that says

1:24:26

a lot about what's going to happen going forward. You're

1:24:28

going to side with them outside of this dynamic,

1:24:31

and I agree with col I'm sick of us because

1:24:33

if you're going to keep doing this, I'm

1:24:35

second into.

1:24:36

My I don't think so.

1:24:36

Why I'm doing a really good one that no one's ever

1:24:39

talked about before, which is that the theme

1:24:41

party. People should dress the theme and you

1:24:43

undermine me. Just sit there

1:24:46

and count down how much time I have left during

1:24:48

my time?

1:24:49

How about that? I'm sick of you at

1:24:52

a theme party, say the theme

1:24:54

is New Year's Eve.

1:24:55

I want to see a couple of hats and glasses, please

1:24:58

for Christ's sake, because I show

1:25:00

up. If you do that again, we're

1:25:03

gonna have a huge problem. This podcast

1:25:05

is over.

1:25:06

I agree. I don't think

1:25:08

so, honey. And that's what did it?

1:25:11

Now? Wait? Hold on? Was is the theme?

1:25:13

Was the theme? New Year's Eve? Because that's fun? It was

1:25:15

Tom Kny's.

1:25:16

Birthday party held at the house of Tom Nye

1:25:18

and Matt Whitaker, and they had a New Year's

1:25:20

Eve themed thirtieth

1:25:22

birthday for Thomas and I

1:25:25

show up and.

1:25:26

I don't know if that everyone is too cool?

1:25:28

But no one was doing the theme and I looked silly

1:25:30

in a white jacket, fun glasses,

1:25:32

yeah, and just look silly.

1:25:35

And I'm I'm the only one dressed for the theme.

1:25:38

And then I get looked at once over

1:25:40

by everyone and I'm like, it's the theme.

1:25:42

Oh, I don't like to see if it's a party

1:25:45

and gay guys are there and they once over, you

1:25:48

give me a break, get out.

1:25:49

It's like, I'm dressed perfect

1:25:53

and y'all just look like

1:25:56

you put a flannel on and rolled out of bed. You're

1:25:58

on your way to Animal afterwards. I get

1:26:01

everyone wants to look their best for Animal. The

1:26:03

Sip and Twirl of Brooklyn. I

1:26:05

want to apologize to you. That would

1:26:07

be appropriate. I think I'm really sorry

1:26:10

mhm if you were offended

1:26:17

you almost there. Girls,

1:26:22

Well, I'm really sorry for interrupting you. I didn't mean

1:26:24

to No, that's okay, somewhere right.

1:26:26

And I don't mean to bring a past you know what,

1:26:29

Oh my god, that I interrupted equivalent

1:26:33

injustices.

1:26:35

You know what happens is col

1:26:37

what Sometimes I get over caffeinated for the

1:26:39

podcast and I get excited, and especially

1:26:41

when we have a guest that I'm really excited to talk to and

1:26:43

really like into.

1:26:45

Yeah, I will often do

1:26:47

the most disabled can I tell you I

1:26:49

don't mind. And people seem to think that I have a

1:26:52

problem with you, like kind of like getting over enthusiastic,

1:26:54

and it's.

1:26:54

Like that's what I love and I really don't

1:26:57

care. Yeah, it's called a podcast, bitch.

1:27:00

When they go on, I'm like, why

1:27:02

are you infantilizing Bowen Like I'm

1:27:04

just like, like I'm a child to

1:27:06

them, it seems like it's like Bowen Yang. If

1:27:09

Bowen Yang ever thought that I was out of pocket,

1:27:12

I have heard it, and I would hear

1:27:14

it and I would think that that's something we shared.

1:27:16

Love wearing diapers.

1:27:19

We were talking about this yesterday me

1:27:21

Josh Sharp, Max Whitert at a

1:27:23

party and we were saying that people,

1:27:27

we just want to try one day where we're in an adult diapers

1:27:30

just to see what it's like, because the models on adult

1:27:32

diapers are just the way they cast

1:27:34

models for adult diapers is so amazing

1:27:36

because it is these I've been in those rooms. Oh

1:27:39

yeah, well you never booked, right, But

1:27:41

it's people who and this is why you didn't book it,

1:27:43

because it's people who look happy

1:27:45

healthy and now you look better. But

1:27:48

back then you brought me probably looked really gone.

1:27:50

Drinking and trying

1:27:53

to get work as a diaper model. And that

1:27:56

was my low, that was my rock bottom.

1:27:58

I was.

1:28:00

Hungover, you know, lost my phone, lost

1:28:02

my wallet. I would show up to these castings,

1:28:05

put on that diaper. It's

1:28:07

you know, me and Geena Davis for the

1:28:11

for the same spot, and she's

1:28:13

you know, the Picture of Health, the

1:28:16

Picture of.

1:28:16

Health Academy Award winner, be

1:28:19

very believable in the.

1:28:19

Diaper absolutely, you know.

1:28:22

Yeah, but then of course neither of us got it,

1:28:24

because that's how this fucked up industry.

1:28:27

I'm sorry, I got to say it. Well,

1:28:29

I have to say something. She booked it. They

1:28:31

just they replaced her with the coke bear. They

1:28:35

put the coke bear over her.

1:28:36

The cocaine bear. Yeah, yes, from

1:28:39

Elizabeth Binks's movie. But can I tell

1:28:41

you something?

1:28:42

What now with this play World's

1:28:45

oyster? It really is you? Thank

1:28:48

you?

1:28:49

Wait?

1:28:50

You really?

1:28:51

But you want to wear like would you wear the

1:28:53

diaper like in life? Like under your pants

1:28:55

in life, like just walk around

1:28:57

just to walk around peep? Yeah,

1:29:00

yeah, for sure, if you're gonna wear it, you might

1:29:02

as well, use it. I don't if I coop,

1:29:04

though I think I would pee. I

1:29:06

don't think for myself, but I don't know if i'd poop on

1:29:08

myself. But we just want to try one night

1:29:11

at the club. Listeners are gonna

1:29:13

hate this episode. It's so much poop.

1:29:16

I just telling I'm telling you guys right now.

1:29:19

I have to say. It would be right in line

1:29:21

with how they felt about our other episodes recently.

1:29:23

So that's actually okay, all

1:29:25

right, I think I have something I

1:29:27

have that's great. And this is

1:29:30

not three missed calls. Oh oh god,

1:29:33

that's a little disconcerting, you know what I

1:29:36

mean?

1:29:36

I can wait. Okay, Well,

1:29:39

where are they from? I'll never know because

1:29:41

it's like random numbers. It always gives

1:29:43

me a little bit of anxiety.

1:29:45

Okay, this is I don't

1:29:47

think so honey, and it's time stress now, I don't think

1:29:49

so honey.

1:29:50

Pills.

1:29:51

You want me to put what where in

1:29:53

my mouth? Here's what my mouth

1:29:56

is. For smiling, saying

1:29:58

a nice compliment to a friend. You look amazing

1:30:00

today, both of you. How

1:30:03

are you gonna get better when you get sick?

1:30:04

Suckin' fucking rimming?

1:30:10

Not for swallowing a little rock

1:30:12

that might not make me better, It might actually

1:30:14

make me feel worse. This mouth is

1:30:17

exit, oh learning, that's

1:30:20

right. Nothing goes in if

1:30:22

I have my drathers, if my perfect

1:30:25

days, if nothing goes into my mouth, if

1:30:28

only stuff comes out like a funny

1:30:30

joke.

1:30:31

A word, vomit.

1:30:34

I'm just I'll say it, just kidding. I need to

1:30:37

eat.

1:30:37

But pills make everything

1:30:39

a vaccine or actually I would

1:30:41

love a microchip in me if it may, if

1:30:43

you could just download a cure to

1:30:46

the brain.

1:30:46

That's that was perfect. Seems

1:30:50

like that was polarizing. Let me tell you something.

1:30:54

I'm going to get emotional. Go there.

1:30:56

If you get sick, you better take pills. Because

1:30:58

I know it's been very tense between us today. But

1:31:01

if you anything ever happened to you, I

1:31:03

would not be able to continue on.

1:31:06

And I'm not gonna let.

1:31:07

Cool between us really

1:31:09

have wedge.

1:31:11

By the way, we now know he eats

1:31:13

with his butthole, with

1:31:16

his mouth. Oh yeah, I'm

1:31:18

trying to.

1:31:20

Desperately out here. Okay, okay,

1:31:25

okay, worming

1:31:28

the anus. Let's warm up our bodies, actually

1:31:32

relax, roll our shoulders, little.

1:31:34

Warm ups before every ship I do. That's good has

1:31:38

taught me a lot about that's a pro.

1:31:40

He's a he's a pro about like protecting

1:31:43

and yeah he's not even like actively

1:31:45

teaching me.

1:31:46

I'm just like watching him going cool,

1:31:48

here's how you do cut cow? That was

1:31:50

so mean? That was so mean. Yeah

1:31:53

that cow, that's that's a that's

1:31:55

a tagalog. Yeah

1:31:59

you better cut that. You better

1:32:02

cut that? Can I say in a real way?

1:32:05

Yes, what happened with your lives?

1:32:06

Love?

1:32:06

At the Tony's Thank

1:32:10

You? Isn't that weird?

1:32:11

Thank you?

1:32:12

It was so good? I guess an overcrowded

1:32:14

season, was it though? Or

1:32:17

I just like a lot of shows. I don't know.

1:32:18

It was yo,

1:32:22

And then I was like when I saw that it got

1:32:24

almost nothing, I was like, oh, maybe it wasn't

1:32:27

eligible, maybe that was last year.

1:32:28

And then fully it was eligible.

1:32:30

But you know it's like summer movies,

1:32:32

how they are like less likely to get oscars.

1:32:36

Like people didn't remember it. Yeah, I guess,

1:32:38

or I don't know, that's the only explanation.

1:32:41

Yeah, Like it just was like totally

1:32:43

blanked across the ward pretty much. I was like, that's so surprising.

1:32:46

Yeah, so this is actually going to be cool

1:32:48

as schools and they said

1:32:51

that it has to do with feed the bird, step

1:32:53

into bag something along. Then

1:32:55

they're Mary, Yeah, very interesting. Well

1:32:57

this is coold schools. I don't think so, honey.

1:32:59

And their time starts now, I don't

1:33:01

think so, honey. The scene and

1:33:03

Mary Poppins where they go to the

1:33:06

bank. The

1:33:08

movie is six hours long,

1:33:11

it is. That scene comes in at hour

1:33:13

five. It takes up another hour.

1:33:16

They get a song, the men

1:33:19

get a song, and I understand

1:33:21

the point of that scene is to be boring,

1:33:23

to show like, oh they

1:33:26

need Mary Poppins.

1:33:27

This is boring. Thirty seconds you

1:33:29

know what thematically have

1:33:32

that scene have no music?

1:33:33

Yeah, you know it's Mary brings

1:33:36

the music in and for that matter, no

1:33:38

music before she comes in either. Okay,

1:33:40

yeah, except

1:33:43

for maybe the children to show that

1:33:45

they want music. You know, because

1:33:48

when was the last time you watched Mary Poppins.

1:33:50

I watched the returns. No, but this

1:33:52

isn't.

1:33:53

I haven't watched it because you're scared of that bank

1:33:55

scene. That's what I'm saying. And that's when you're so

1:33:58

right, And can I tell you something. Yeah,

1:34:01

the whole arc of Mary Poppins,

1:34:04

that movie is like not to bring

1:34:06

drugs in again. It is like it's

1:34:08

all a calm down after they go to cartoons, super

1:34:11

califradulstic. Pot

1:34:13

come down. It's Pot comes down.

1:34:16

It's like that classic. You're coming down

1:34:18

off of the feeling.

1:34:22

High and you're like shaking and shapes

1:34:25

and you get the and you're like your teeth

1:34:27

hurt and you're like, oh my god, why did I smoke all

1:34:30

that pot drug?

1:34:33

Waken bake all right, Waken Bacon

1:34:35

fly in. Yeah, that classic was

1:34:37

like.

1:34:39

Stupid. And Mary Poppins is so fucking

1:34:41

dumb crazy

1:34:44

you were saying before, just like every woman you

1:34:47

said that before. Mary Poppins

1:34:49

is so dumb, just like every crazy, hysterical

1:34:51

woman. Now, so.

1:34:58

Julie Andrews drag

1:35:01

Julian Andrews can fuck, can fuck?

1:35:03

I bet you know what's crazy? What is

1:35:06

she has fucked? And you know, you think

1:35:08

about Julie Andrews and you don't think about fucking. But then

1:35:10

not everyone has seen Victor Vittoria.

1:35:12

But her career after Sony music was

1:35:14

I need to like let go of. I

1:35:16

think she made a movie with Blake

1:35:19

Edwards where she was like topless.

1:35:21

Several movies right after, and there's a lot of

1:35:23

subtext in Princess Diaries about how she's an

1:35:25

informaniac.

1:35:26

I don't think so, honey. Can

1:35:30

I coin a phrase? I don't think so, honey?

1:35:33

That was the Kelsey. Well now now it's

1:35:35

done.

1:35:36

Now it's done now, and now I just feel silly about

1:35:38

the whole Can I say something though? Yeah?

1:35:40

I think today this

1:35:44

podcast and you guys are back, thank

1:35:46

you so much like I was, a lot of people

1:35:48

are period. You're

1:35:51

not even kidding. A lot of people are going to say, you

1:35:54

guys are back, and I want you to be friends.

1:35:56

Earlier I wanted you guys to not be

1:35:58

friends.

1:35:59

Can I tell you something?

1:36:00

There's nothing you could have said that would have come between

1:36:02

us? Really? Wow,

1:36:05

that really made me scared? Really, what

1:36:08

do you know?

1:36:10

Well?

1:36:10

Should I? Yeah,

1:36:14

that's the dichotomy and don't me

1:36:16

Yeah, no,

1:36:19

no, I really just I'm I was worried

1:36:22

and now I'm not. You're

1:36:24

welcome. I hope I bet episode inspired

1:36:26

confidence, and I hope it

1:36:28

inspired period period, and

1:36:31

I hope it inspired Yeah. Go see

1:36:34

what Wicked? Oh Mary? Go

1:36:36

see Wicked the movie and Oh Mary

1:36:38

on Broadway? How do you think Wicked the movie is going

1:36:40

to be Pretendy's not here. Oh I can't

1:36:43

wait, I really can't. And I've

1:36:45

never seen it on stage. You've never seen

1:36:47

it. I know, I I know I would,

1:36:50

I know I would. You gotta go, you

1:36:52

gotta go. It's that thing where I forget that.

1:36:56

Can just go. Oh yeah, yeah, absolutely can just

1:36:58

go. In fact, I'm like, I don't have tickets,

1:37:00

Like, oh you get tickets, you get

1:37:03

I was going to say you should go tonight, but it's

1:37:05

Monday. And famously their.

1:37:07

Dog is dark. But but oh Mary

1:37:09

will not be dark on Mondays in the summer.

1:37:11

Wow.

1:37:11

Perfect. Then then

1:37:13

when are you dark then Sundays? You

1:37:16

did tell me that?

1:37:17

Yeah?

1:37:17

Oh like no.

1:37:20

Conrad's like very very, very very religious.

1:37:23

I'm kidding.

1:37:25

I was like trying to search my mind. I remember if that was

1:37:27

true. It's deeply, not deeply

1:37:30

he's such a heathen.

1:37:31

Oh he really is. He believes in like

1:37:34

up ending all social norms. Yeah,

1:37:37

chaos.

1:37:39

Yeah, this is a Judaeo Christian podcast, by

1:37:41

the way, so we have to sort of float away from

1:37:43

that.

1:37:44

You did inspire me to go

1:37:46

see Hello Dolly by myself? Wait

1:37:49