Podchaser Logo
Home
Side Stories: Son of Ram

Side Stories: Son of Ram

Released Wednesday, 24th April 2024
Good episode? Give it some love!
Side Stories: Son of Ram

Side Stories: Son of Ram

Side Stories: Son of Ram

Side Stories: Son of Ram

Wednesday, 24th April 2024
Good episode? Give it some love!
Rate Episode

Episode Transcript

Transcripts are displayed as originally observed. Some content, including advertisements may have changed.

Use Ctrl + F to search

0:00

Summer, the best time of year, usually

0:02

doesn't come with a great deal. Soaring

0:04

temperatures come with soaring prices. But what

0:06

if there's another way? With IKEA, your

0:08

summer plans can last longer than two

0:11

weeks of vacation and be more affordable.

0:13

Here, everyone can have lounge chair access,

0:15

no reservations needed. From affordable outdoor

0:18

furniture to stylish accessories, we have all the

0:20

essentials you need to soak up summer in

0:22

style, no matter the size of your space.

0:24

Start planning a better summer. With IKEA,

0:26

it's your outdoor dreams inside your

0:28

budget. Hear

0:34

that? It's the call of the crave. And

0:36

when the crave calls, you know what to

0:38

do. Try the $5 Bacon Bundle, because the

0:40

only thing better than a White Castle slider

0:42

is a White Castle slider topped with crispy

0:45

hickory smoked bacon. So pick any two of

0:47

either the Bacon Cheese Slider, 1921 Bacon Cheese

0:49

Slider, or

0:51

Chicken Bacon Ranch Slider. And also get a small

0:53

fry for just $5 with the $5 Bacon Bundle.

0:57

White Castle. Follow your crave. On

1:03

Wizard and the Bruiser, we find

1:05

all those crazy little moments in

1:07

geek history that make the things

1:09

we love into inescapable cultural behemoths. If

1:11

you love video games, movies, comics, and

1:13

anime, this is the LPN show

1:15

for you. But wait, Holden, it's not

1:18

just educational. Shouldn't we talk about all

1:20

those crazy boner jokes we make

1:22

all the time? No, Jake! No,

1:25

we will not! Fair enough! Last

1:27

podcast network presents Wizard and the Bruiser.

1:30

Find it on your favorite podcast app

1:32

and hit that little subby-dubby button. Ooh,

1:35

we would love it if you did that. Oh, that would

1:37

help us out so much. God, wouldn't you love to do

1:39

that? Don't I sound like the kind of person you want

1:41

to help? Like, hit the button. Like, just do it. There's

1:45

no place to escape to. This is

1:47

the last podcast on the left. Side

1:50

stories? Yes, but

1:52

you're blazed. That's when the cannibalism started. Side

1:56

stories. Yes. So

2:04

I pitch a lot of ideas to

2:06

Natalie and obviously

2:08

she's kind of the litmus test of

2:11

like how I feel like

2:13

society will react. Yeah. Because

2:15

she has a conscience. Yes. Yeah,

2:17

I know. It's good. I

2:19

do the same thing with Julie. She's my

2:21

feelings. It's nice because like they're like genuine,

2:23

wonderful women with consciences and

2:26

we destroy them with horrible ideas.

2:28

No, it's just nice because then we don't

2:30

have to have those feelings. Yeah. I

2:32

can just say to them. Yeah, my wife does that.

2:34

That's the idea. That's what they do. Yeah, my wife

2:37

fights for good causes. Yes, they should. Yeah. And

2:39

we should be at war. We

2:42

should be in Iran right now fighting

2:44

though. Which ones? Them.

2:47

Yeah. We should be doing something. I'm sure.

2:50

But I was coming up with some ideas. Right? Again,

2:52

because host spice is taking off. Yeah.

2:55

I'm already seeing a lot of people. I

2:57

think one message about host spice is that

2:59

one kind of issue is that there is

3:01

a lot of old men grabbing that butts

3:04

in hospices. Yeah. Like

3:06

already. Oh, for sure. Yeah, that's what

3:08

old men do. But if you made- George

3:10

Bush Sr., we saw, what was his thing? Oh, he

3:13

used to be in there. They call me David Copperfield.

3:15

Yeah, that's right. Yeah, the best thing a president has

3:17

ever said. And then

3:19

you, but so they say that

3:21

there might be an issue with that, but also at the

3:23

same time, but if they're like professionals, everybody's getting there and

3:25

we're there to grab a bus. Great.

3:28

Right. I think that'll be good.

3:30

Host spice, you get your, obviously you get your catheter put

3:32

in the fun way by mouth, which

3:34

I think you don't get a lot. But

3:37

I did pitch an idea to Natalie

3:39

that I thought was really funny. Okay.

3:41

No, it's like, why have we not seen a

3:43

pet cleaning service or a pet, you

3:46

know, like, I'm just surprised. Yeah. Why

3:48

have we not seen okay groomer?

3:51

Okay groomer? Yeah. Like

3:54

instead of okay boomer. Okay. And

3:56

I thought that that would be fun to do and you make

3:58

it so like, Oh, come to. Okay, groomer, it's

4:01

the only cancel culture safe

4:04

place for your dog or cat

4:06

or your horse to

4:09

get washed, bathed and

4:11

told to vote for Trump. Yeah, and we'll go

4:13

ahead and we'll take the clippers and we'll put

4:15

a dick on the side of them. I

4:18

mean, again, cancel culture free, grooming

4:20

experience, okay, groomer. And I thought

4:22

that's amazing. Natalie says she thinks

4:24

that everyone at okay, groomer is going

4:26

to get shot. Everyone at

4:28

okay, no. They're the ones

4:31

who do the shooting. But she says that

4:33

then it sounds like it's going to become

4:35

a new comet pizza where people are going

4:37

to go to okay, groomer because they're not

4:39

going to see the fun, like full of

4:42

zest for life, like idea behind.

4:44

You think they're going to be confused with

4:46

groomers as in like people who talk people

4:48

into sex? I don't know if

4:50

that's the term. I don't even know if that's

4:53

the definition. Welcome to Side Stories. I'm Henry Zebrowski.

4:55

This is Ed Larson. I

4:57

don't think it's- Okay, groomer. I

4:59

think, okay, groomer. She

5:01

said that it might bring violence towards the

5:03

people inside of the place. And I was

5:05

like, but the best part is they're all

5:07

safe because they're surrounded by dogs. Yeah, or

5:09

you get a van and you show

5:11

up to people's houses. So you're saying that we

5:14

should have a big white van that says, okay,

5:16

groomer. Paint it whatever color you want. So you're

5:18

just saying, just a van. You do understand there,

5:20

Rosick. I will push back

5:22

on this idea because you know that there's

5:25

a connotation to a roving van. Yeah.

5:28

And if you put okay, groomer on the side of it, everyone

5:30

knows what it is. Yeah. I mean,

5:32

now I'm starting to understand it sounds like a

5:34

mobile pedophile, like

5:37

delivery service. It's like delivering pedophiles

5:39

to your home. So yeah, it's not good. No.

5:42

All right. It's flawed for sure. Yes.

5:45

But I just thought it was a funny name. It is a funny name. See,

5:47

when I thought- at first when you came

5:49

to me with it just now, when you said,

5:51

okay, groomer, my brain didn't go to okay, boomer.

5:54

It went to okay, cupid. And so I thought

5:56

you were just trying to hook up groomers with

5:58

each other. Like

6:00

you're saying, okay, what you

6:02

meant just then was putting

6:04

together people that cut the

6:06

hair of animals together to

6:08

hang out. Yeah. So

6:10

they can meet each other and fuck each other and

6:12

get to know each other. And yeah, you're as innocent

6:15

as a, as a baby in arms. Is that?

6:17

I think that's what it is. You're

6:19

innocent. You really thought of the position,

6:21

like the job groomer. Yeah. That's

6:24

not just from the CIA. Yeah. That's

6:26

amazing. Yeah. Yeah. Wow.

6:30

I don't care yet. No. Well,

6:32

I also don't, I believe in everything you've

6:34

taught me. I just don't care. That's

6:37

kind of my thing. Sure. Good. No,

6:40

it's a good, honestly, very good condom

6:42

against fucking up against being radicalized on

6:45

the internet. The news has always been

6:47

a nightmare for my entire life. It's

6:49

been a fucking disaster nightmare, terrifying place.

6:51

The key to not get radicalized on

6:54

the internet is have a thick layer

6:56

of fish provided, not care

6:58

juice that surrounds your whole brain. You just came

7:00

back from fish. You saw them at the sphere

7:02

on four 20. You

7:07

cared about a single thing. I

7:09

would be pissed. Like if you

7:12

came back from fish on four 20 and

7:14

you were like, we really need to think about

7:16

the infrastructure of this country. I'm going to be

7:18

like, where did you go for the weekend? How

7:21

are you not? Why aren't you? Why

7:23

are you here? Yeah, man. You should

7:25

have quit your job, dude. The TV was so big. It's

7:27

so big. It's the

7:29

fucking size of a fucking building. The

7:32

fucking hieroglyphics were their albums, man. Did you know

7:34

that? I didn't know that. Some

7:37

fucker had to come up and be

7:39

like, yo, man, the hieroglyphics are their

7:41

albums, man. That's crazy, dude. Some guy,

7:44

wow. Yeah. We

7:46

saw through all of it. Yeah. Lots of people talk

7:48

to me the whole weekend. It was not, I was

7:50

in Vegas the whole weekend. I went to fish only

7:52

for one of the four shows with the sphere. In

7:54

the entire weekend, people were just walking up to me

7:56

like, fish, you going to fish? Like the entire weekend,

7:58

like handing me pieces of paper. that I was supposed

8:00

to hand other people. For what? I don't

8:03

know, they do this weird passing around things.

8:05

I don't know, I didn't participate. I was

8:07

there to just eat mushrooms and fucking stare

8:09

at the big TV. And you did a

8:11

really good job at it. Oh my God,

8:13

I did a good job at it. I

8:15

saw your footage, but I'm glad you're here,

8:17

but I am surprised that you still are

8:19

financially solvent. Only just because fish, I feel

8:22

like liberates people. Oh yeah. And liberates a

8:24

type of person. Dude, people were spending money.

8:26

I almost like- Fish does very well. It

8:28

was crazy, right before I was like, I'm just

8:30

gonna check and see how much my tickets are going for. They

8:32

were going for like five grand. It

8:34

was so hard for me not to sell them

8:36

in this fucking- Whoa! And Julie

8:38

got on the one, the lottery, so we didn't pay too much.

8:41

But like, it was fucking, yeah dude, it was

8:43

fucking crazy. Yeah dude, that might be worth not

8:45

going. It was hard for me not to go,

8:47

but I was like, you know what, we're just

8:49

never gonna do this again. You're right. And that's

8:51

it, this is my sixth time seeing fish. I

8:54

was talking to people like 178 times. I'm

8:57

like, I'm quitting now. I'm

8:59

quitting at six. Oh, I, I'm

9:01

done. I've done it. I've seen fish everywhere,

9:03

the sphere is the top. You're saying that

9:05

all the noodling sounds the same? No,

9:08

it doesn't sound the same. It's just,

9:10

I'm fucking done. I've done it. I

9:12

have pamphlets. What we should do is

9:14

that whenever Ed gets too reasonable, we

9:16

should get some noodling to play. Yeah,

9:18

every single time he says something that's

9:20

too coded. I like cars, trucks, and

9:22

buses to get that one. Yeah, we

9:24

just should hit him with the unrecognizable

9:26

fish song. Do

9:28

they have melodies, fish songs? Yeah, they

9:31

do. They have, you know, taste they played.

9:33

That was really good. Yeah, hold them like

9:35

some things. Farmhouse, you know, they have kits,

9:38

but it's the live albums. It's the experience.

9:40

That's what people, I hear, I've heard. Yeah,

9:42

yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, this guy.

9:46

Is that the guy from fish? No, no, no, no, no.

9:48

This is just, this is the song I like. Yeah,

9:52

man. It's fine. Welcome to the

9:54

other side, you fuckers, man. Just

9:56

fucking light your fingers on fire.

9:58

You know what I'm saying? Over

10:00

there glass melts and becomes the sand

10:02

again taxes are due friends That's what

10:04

this song says to me that we're

10:06

just paying what's his name's taxes Phil?

10:08

Oh my god Yes, I had to

10:10

pay some taxes. Well good work really

10:12

good work Well, I'm glad that you're

10:14

alive and I'm glad that you're still

10:17

hireable. Mm-hmm Some updates. Yeah

10:19

last week number one Eddie brought up

10:21

which ended up being kind of an

10:23

uncomfortable Topic for us, but

10:25

it did we did kind of get through

10:27

it where we talked Eddie for some reason

10:29

made me Answer what animal

10:31

I would have sex with and I just

10:33

said chimpanzee just for the sake of saying

10:35

chimpanzee to end it I was just trying

10:38

to end the conversation Yeah, but now people

10:40

have sent me so many articles about all

10:42

the different ways people have sex with monkeys

10:44

I got another clip on mayor gasms We're

10:46

just hope people having sex with the horses

10:48

if we I feel like we are we

10:51

need to guide us back We need to

10:53

guide us back to the to other stories

10:55

other things to towards other other

10:57

content You know, yeah, because the orangutan sex

10:59

slave story that was sent to me But the

11:01

shaved orangutan that he had dressed up like a

11:04

little girl and they put little lipstick on which

11:06

is like in the end We're kissing. Yeah

11:10

You're gonna go to the only dead deadwood rules

11:12

with the orangutan. I just don't really understand you're

11:14

gonna kiss Anything kiss the neck

11:16

kiss the tits I'm only having sex with

11:18

the chimpanzee because I'm forced to because you're

11:20

gonna shoot me in the back of the

11:22

head and it Is vaginal sex with a

11:25

woman? Chip. Yeah, no, it's not

11:27

a hat. Well shave the breasts. You're gonna

11:29

have them shave the breasts When

11:36

I saw that story But then that was the

11:38

orangutan sex life story that it was the guy

11:40

that was arrested for the monkey torture ring the

11:42

guy Who was from the white power like the

11:44

neo-nazi guy that was we you know He was

11:46

just serving up like the monkeys and blenders and

11:48

people were paying him for it again. We're working

11:50

too hard Yeah, so these articles are sent to

11:52

anything about the pigs about pig sex No,

11:55

really. No, there was a you

11:58

like the popular shit I do

12:01

you know that's me. I'm a poser when it

12:03

comes to my Yeah,

12:05

I'm like a doo-a-leep. I do a

12:07

leap. Ah was an orangutan Yeah I

12:10

did get a message for my friend

12:13

Sarah who did send a message to

12:15

Marcus Parks that was honestly It was

12:18

a fairly sexual picture of the Anamorphic

12:20

deer. Oh nice looking it was like it

12:22

was it was going to welcome a lovemaking

12:25

session inside of them That's great. But

12:27

what do you think will be the first

12:29

episode? We don't talk about humans fucking animals. It

12:32

says it will come Now

12:34

just like the animals. We're gonna change right now.

12:36

We don't know they can't consent. All right Well

12:39

the big comeback that we got. Yeah, this

12:41

is crazy. I love our listener I can't

12:43

believe this poll results, but I asked it

12:45

was I actually feel like it is What

12:49

I was expecting but I'm glad that we

12:51

got as much as a little off from

12:53

what you expect sure So this we asked

12:55

everybody and I still want you to ask

12:57

people this because it's fun to do We

12:59

said yeah, ask a stranger not a friend

13:01

not somebody that was into true crime when

13:03

you ask them What's

13:06

the first thing that you think of when

13:08

you hear the word murderer? What's the first

13:10

person and get their response you had said

13:12

something along the lines of he thought I

13:14

might be OJ Simpson I thought OJ would

13:16

be everyone's hands would be the layman's answer

13:18

for murderer, but I think largely It's because

13:20

you like a you like a sports just

13:22

like most people Sure, you

13:24

like a sports and you like again. He would

13:26

be very famous. I said something It was also

13:28

one that was on the news most yeah, yes,

13:30

of course Well in especially that time period crime

13:32

of the century well people for our age all

13:34

right There's been like the trial of the century

13:36

has been like how many trials of the century

13:38

well There's crime of the century which was Lindbergh

13:40

baby, and that was taken early, but you can

13:42

call it the 20 I don't think you can

13:44

call it the time of the century. It was

13:46

one baby. Yeah, yeah, all right. He was a

13:49

not Charles

13:51

Lindbergh we have things we're gonna do a whole series on that

13:53

I can't wait. It's very it's actually that story's fascinating

13:56

All right, so here's the poll so we got back overwhelming

13:59

amount named Jeffrey Dahmer

14:01

as the Netflix show like set that off.

14:03

It was Jeffrey Dahmer, Ted Bundy, and John

14:06

Wayne Gacy were based with the top three

14:08

and they were pretty close in numbers. It

14:10

was like Jeffrey Dahmer, we had 59 mentions,

14:12

Ted Bundy 49, John Wayne Gacy, we had

14:15

32. And then number four

14:17

was OJ Simpson followed closely by Charles Manson.

14:19

So I had Jack the Ripper. Yeah, Jack

14:21

the Ripper makes sense. I'm surprised and then

14:23

yeah those are the only ones that are

14:25

10 and over. The rest of them are

14:27

just a couple. So here are some of

14:29

my favorite outliers. We have some really

14:31

good funny outliers. Hitler was

14:33

twice, of course, he got two. Anakin

14:37

Skywalker, he killed

14:39

all those kids and it was before and then

14:42

he would become I hate you. And then he

14:44

would become Darth Vader, right? Then

14:47

just the fictional character

14:50

Blade, which I do think that

14:52

makes sense. Chris Watts. The Blade didn't kill

14:54

people. He killed vampires.

14:56

Yeah. The

14:58

vampire service people in that world. Maybe.

15:01

Then they said, oh, political Lockheed

15:03

Martin. Whoa. But that only had

15:05

one. Not only

15:07

had one and my personal favorite, myself,

15:09

when I'm down at my wife's pussy.

15:12

Oh yeah, he's a murderer. Like that guy.

15:14

We'll have to meet him at some point.

15:16

We probably already have. I wonder what the

15:18

wife has to say. Oh, and then. One

15:20

more PBR for my husband, please. Yes. Also

15:24

the very, very funny answer of

15:27

your mom. Yeah, definitely like that.

15:29

So thank you so much for the security. Scarf

15:32

in the Lion King. Scarf Lion King, that's funny.

15:34

Again, he only killed one. True killer. But

15:36

he only killed one. He tried to kill more. He

15:39

tried. Yeah, I also tried to be a

15:41

professional baseball player in my mind. Did

15:44

you? No. I'm just saying,

15:46

try. It's also from Star Wars. That's not Star Wars.

15:48

That's true. That's, fuck me.

15:50

That's Lion King. But

15:53

there is no try. I need

15:55

to. Oh, I got you. Yes. Grogu

16:00

could still fucking suck my dick. Whoa! Hey

16:03

Grogu, and that's not pedophile, that's not

16:05

pedophilia. I love that. That's

16:07

not pedophilia. He's an old man. Grogu's

16:09

50. He's 50 years

16:12

old. Side Story's lpotlgmail.com.

16:15

If an alien is a

16:17

baby to us, but

16:20

a baby to them, but old to us,

16:22

can you fuck it without space charges? But

16:25

that's the people. But

16:29

that's the people. I

16:32

gotta know what you guys think. What

16:35

are the intergalactic laws on

16:37

fucking Grogu? Grogu fucking Grogu.

16:40

Again, I'm not into it because I

16:42

don't want to hear his weird little

16:45

whimpering. No, not at all. No, I

16:47

don't want to hear it. He can slurp some

16:49

eggs though. You

16:53

haven't watched, right? No. You

16:55

would like the Mandalorian. I watched

16:57

the first one. Again, my review

16:59

was controversial, more like Mandiborian. Whoa!

17:02

You asshole. I'm pretty special. I'm

17:05

pretty smart. I'm

17:07

pretty educated, and I am. Very

17:14

nice. You like dude. You

17:16

don't like the Mandalorian? Is this too many

17:18

things happening? You know what was about the

17:20

Mandalorian? I think Mandalorian was fine. Yeah.

17:23

I just saw one episode. I don't like TV. Oh,

17:26

there it is. I don't watch TV. I don't

17:28

really like movies. I like movies more than TV.

17:30

Yeah, I like movies. I like documentaries. Yeah. And

17:32

I like my nonfiction shows. Yeah. And

17:35

I like my reality shows. I

17:37

like my Drag Race, and I

17:39

like my Top Chef, and I like my shows. Now

17:42

that I'm thinking about it, I don't think I've ever heard you talk about 1883

17:45

or some shit

17:47

like that. What's that? That's the

17:49

Harrison Ford, Helen Mirrenge, prequel to Yellowstone.

17:51

No, am I in hoespice? No, you

17:54

would like it. It was

17:56

a lot of murder. A lot of murder. I mean,

17:58

it's not enough. It's still not enough. They'll

18:00

say, everyone says a lot of murder, and then

18:02

they go to watch a show, because I love

18:04

murder, and they go to watch a show for

18:06

all the supposed fucking murder in it, and then

18:08

it's all like classy and shit. I like faces

18:10

getting cleaved. I like

18:13

arms being stripped of their flesh.

18:16

Mm-hmm. It's so weird. I've seen all

18:18

these Taylor Sheridan things, and I don't like him, but

18:20

I've watched all of it. I don't know how, like,

18:22

there's like a spell on me. I just think it's

18:24

your algorithm that gets into you, and you like it. I

18:27

don't know if I like it, because I always end

18:29

up like mad. I think it just turns me off.

18:31

It might... Mentally, not

18:33

like sexually. Yeah,

18:35

I get hard as hell. I get hard

18:37

as hell watching Yellowstone. Yeah, except with that

18:40

one lady. There's that one lady in that.

18:42

Oh, the daughter? She's spicy. No, the

18:44

wife. The wife? The spicy

18:46

wife. I don't think he has a wife. What's

18:48

the name? What's a blonde woman in that show?

18:50

That's his daughter. What's his daughter? That's

18:53

Costner's daughter. She's like my age. Yeah,

18:56

Kevin Costner's old. Whoa. Old

19:00

daughter. Yeah. Could

19:03

there be a thing that's milfs but for daughters?

19:08

Old milfs are daughters.

19:11

Henry. What? Not

19:13

anymore, dawg. Not once

19:15

they hit 27. All

19:18

right. And

19:21

that's a fallacy, but again, I love a milf, so I

19:23

think it's great. That was

19:26

the update. I do think I got

19:28

a lot of great messages, people saying

19:30

it's amazing to get good, old-fashioned, crowd-sourced

19:33

information. This is

19:35

our family feud. People know the

19:38

name Jeffrey Dahmer. They know the name Ted Bundy.

19:40

It's the Netflix show. If it wasn't for the

19:42

Netflix show, I bet he wouldn't have been number

19:44

one. And they don't know their crimes. Well, they

19:46

know Jeffrey Dahmer, it's all the big subset. It's

19:48

Jeffrey Dahmer, Cannibal, Ted Bundy. They don't say anything

19:50

about Ted Bundy, but they know that Ted Bundy

19:52

is a name. Yeah, he's a killer. And

19:55

then John Wayne Gacy, Evil Clown. Yeah,

19:57

yeah. And then OJ Simpson, that guy from the

19:59

hearse. commercials. That's what

20:01

they love. But no,

20:04

our audience is like, because also I

20:07

feel like true crime, while it has

20:09

always been an interest of a large

20:11

section of humankind, it's just

20:14

now way more like of the of the money.

20:16

I mean it's kind of going in a, it's

20:18

in a, how do you put

20:20

it? It doesn't really go away, but true crime is

20:22

it had hit a peak and then it receded and

20:24

now we're trying to figure out what to go next.

20:26

I don't know what people, they don't know what they

20:28

want, like your hair. It

20:34

knows where it's going next. It's

20:37

going to hell. You're going

20:39

to my fucking, no, you know where it's going

20:41

man is my fucking, my sides, my ears. Yeah.

20:43

Natalie had his show me the other day, I

20:45

had full, like it looked like my ears had

20:47

little, you gotta shave your ears. Just getting little

20:50

beards on. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What the fuck? Yeah,

20:52

no, Julie gets in my ears for me. Yeah,

20:55

you gotta talk to Natalie, she's got to get in

20:57

there. She said no. Or you gotta talk to your

21:00

barber. Yeah, sometimes I got my ears waxed recently. I

21:02

had to put wax in my ears and then rip

21:06

out all the hair. Yeah man.

21:09

10 bucks. 10 bucks. Why do

21:11

you call that a fucking like,

21:13

it's not a Brazilian. That's like

21:15

a South Dakota. What do

21:17

you call that? What do you got to go

21:19

get your ear lobes? Yeah man, you got to

21:21

find the Armenian barbers for that. They know what

21:23

you're talking about. We are becoming orangutans. This

21:26

happening to us. Right from North way.

21:29

My sister is the best gift giver I've ever

21:31

met with any person. Shekki

21:33

Zabrowski. She shops all

21:36

year thinking about her

21:38

family and friends and puts little things aside

21:40

for their birthdays and Christmases. I have no

21:42

idea how she does it. I

21:45

don't know how she do it, but guess

21:47

what? She always wins Mother's Day, but not

21:49

this year. I'm coming back. Ready

21:51

to win Mother's Day and submit your reputation as

21:53

the best gift giver in the family. I'm taking

21:55

the crown. All right. Give

21:57

the moms in her life an aura digital picture frame.

22:00

pre-loaded with decades of family photos. I mean

22:02

this, we have the Aura Frame up in

22:04

my home, we absolutely love it, I can

22:06

put photos on it very, very easily through

22:09

the app, it's fun to do, and the

22:11

memories keep cycling and I get emotional and

22:13

we filled it with pictures of Karmie and

22:15

Wendy and that is not sad, that is

22:17

celebratory. So you should try it, it's honestly

22:19

a really good product. Right now Aura has

22:22

a great deal for Mother's Day, listeners can

22:24

save on the perfect gift by visiting auroframes.com

22:26

to get $30 off plus

22:28

free shipping on their best selling frame.

22:31

That's a-u-r-a-frames.com, use code

22:33

LEFT at checkout to

22:35

save terms and conditions

22:37

apply. Last podcast

22:39

on the left is sponsored

22:41

by Squarespace. Squarespace is the

22:43

all in one website platform

22:45

for entrepreneurs to stand out

22:47

and succeed online. With

22:50

Squarespace, it's easy to create a

22:52

beautiful website all on your terms.

22:54

You don't wanna miss Fluid Engine

22:56

because if you do, it

22:59

ain't coming back around. It is a next

23:01

generation website design system from Squarespace

23:03

with reimagined drag and drop technology

23:06

for desktop or mobile. So let's

23:08

say, we're doing well so far,

23:10

we're moving these picks. If

23:13

you wanna move, the Judge Ryan

23:15

holds non-clothed edition of horse picks

23:17

on the Clydesdale, you can drag

23:19

it straight to your

23:22

cart, it's that easy. You also

23:24

can drag an entire giraffe ride

23:26

trip for your family because

23:28

daddy gets the back of the head. Right,

23:31

you just drag that from the option menu

23:33

straight to your cart and don't delete because

23:36

I'll know if you deleted. I'll know if

23:38

you did it, thanks to Squarespace.

23:41

Head to squarespace.com for a free

23:43

trial. And when you're ready to

23:45

launch, go to squarespace.com/left to save

23:47

10% off your first purchase of

23:49

a website or domain, squarespace.com.

23:55

Summer, the best time of year usually

23:57

doesn't come with a great deal. Soaring

23:59

temperatures come with. soaring prices. But

24:01

what if there's another way? With IKEA,

24:03

your summer plans can last longer than two

24:05

weeks of vacation and be more affordable.

24:08

Here, everyone can have lounge chair

24:10

access, no reservations needed. From affordable

24:12

outdoor furniture to stylish accessories, we

24:14

have all the essentials you need to soak

24:16

up summer in style, no matter the size

24:19

of your space. Start planning a better summer.

24:21

With IKEA, it's your outdoor dreams inside your

24:23

budget. Also,

24:25

one piece of nerdy sci-fi news that I wanted

24:28

to cover before we bring in our various special

24:30

guest. We have a guest today. I

24:34

need literally, I'm saying, I'm talking about

24:36

this story because I want someone to

24:38

explain it to me. Side Story's opotl@gmail.com.

24:41

Because from what I can see here,

24:43

I don't particularly understand it, but I

24:46

want to know what they're talking about.

24:48

So this came from the debrief. The

24:50

debrief is they cover a lot of

24:52

tech news and stuff within military tech,

24:54

and they have kind of led the

24:57

charge of talking about whether or not

24:59

some of the UAP stuff we're seeing,

25:01

UAP or UFO, and any

25:03

of these weirds of transmenium vehicles, these

25:05

weird orbs, whether or not they are

25:07

technology that we just don't know about

25:09

that China has or Russia has or

25:12

we have, and we're literally lying to our

25:14

own armed forces about what

25:16

we have. That's one theory.

25:18

And this article that just

25:20

came out, NASA Veterans' Propellantless

25:23

Propulsion Drive that physics says shouldn't

25:25

work, just produced enough thrust to

25:27

overcome Earth's gravity. Now this was

25:29

developed by a man by the

25:31

name of Dr. Charles Bueller. Bueller

25:33

is a NASA engineer and co-founder

25:35

of Exodus Propulsion Technologies. And what

25:37

I don't seem to understand is

25:39

what it seems to say here

25:42

is that if you electrify something

25:44

correctly, it floats.

25:47

So he is essentially saying that they

25:49

can charge an object in a way

25:52

to produce what they called, what they

25:54

figured, what they realized was one gravity.

25:57

So what they did was then, what that means is that if you

25:59

can get a to one gravity that means

26:01

it's actively fighting against the gravity

26:04

of the planet Earth. And

26:06

so that means it's a one to one.

26:08

So eventually what you could do is increase

26:10

that and then it'll like be able to

26:12

just very very easily leave the planet Earth.

26:15

Okay, sure. And

26:18

this is electricity, fuck, tells gravity to go

26:20

fuck itself is what you're saying. This

26:25

is why you shouldn't let your kid go to

26:27

fish on 420 because what it does is it

26:31

makes you number one lethally curious

26:34

to anything a man hands you that has a

26:37

drug bar gone. And

26:39

two, you know, I think

26:41

that, yeah, it does help

26:43

simplify your understanding. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So

26:45

yeah, so like maybe, do you think Ted

26:47

Bundy floated when they electrocuted him? Yeah, he

26:50

was like, whoa, whoa, whoa,

26:52

whoa, having a knife, you scone!

26:54

Busy lifting drinks! So

26:59

we can make UAPs now. Well, they're saying

27:01

that, well, what if we already have? Or

27:03

they don't, this is all very theoretical.

27:06

I would love for someone to explain

27:08

it to me in a way that

27:10

a fat bodied comedian man might understand.

27:12

Yeah, UAPs, I feel like from

27:14

what I've been learning from you in these

27:16

last couple of super serious UFO mandates are

27:19

they would have to be drones. Some of

27:21

them. And I love you, like,

27:23

why send a person? Why send an alien

27:25

when you could just send a robot? It's

27:28

very possible. Or do they send things in

27:30

a, I think the concept of them sending

27:32

a deep image of a

27:34

ship, like a hologram of the ship with

27:36

them in it from very, very, very far

27:38

away. Okay. And so what if some of the

27:40

stuff we see, there is a one. But what's the point

27:42

of that? So that they can do recon. Like,

27:45

let's say they are, this is all under the

27:47

one specific umbrella that these are flesh

27:49

and blood creatures. Yeah. They

27:52

have to eat, like they have to have

27:54

stuff. So what if, but there could just be

27:56

a bunch of jelly. Absolutely.

27:58

But they might still need. to eat, they

28:00

might still need to do stuff. So let's just

28:02

say one concept is they are

28:05

either running out of resources like we

28:07

are or running out of

28:09

literally just living space or are

28:11

they a conqueror race? Are

28:14

they just curious? Literally just curious.

28:16

Are we them from

28:18

the very, very, very far future?

28:20

Or the very, very, very past?

28:22

Who knows? And that maybe they're

28:25

literally this so then they could

28:27

create an interdimensional window, ostensibly to

28:29

look at us from there. That's

28:31

one theory. I don't know. I don't buy

28:33

it that they'd come here. Why? You're here.

28:36

I know I'm here. I was born here.

28:38

Yeah, man. You didn't ask for that either.

28:40

Yeah. But I think that if we were

28:42

going to another planet years away, how old

28:44

am I going to get getting there? Unless you

28:47

can do it instantly through an interdimensional porthole. I

28:49

don't think they have those. Those don't make sense.

28:51

See, this is the thing. I thought fish would

28:53

you got to let it in because

28:55

you could see this. There's so many

28:57

things capable. How do you think Phil

29:00

gets from place to place to place?

29:02

Who's Phil? The lead singer of Trey.

29:06

Trey Anastasio. What's Phil? Phil?

29:09

Is it from Pantera? No, it's

29:11

fucking punks with Tony Phil. Who's

29:13

the lead singer of Pantera? Who

29:15

cares? Dimebag Darrell, not him. Trey

29:17

Anastasio. The only way he gets

29:19

back and forth is by,

29:21

I mean, like he probably just thinks he's

29:23

in a magic chair and all of a

29:26

sudden he's playing his electrified Bandra. It is

29:28

surprisingly thought out. Yeah, of course it has

29:30

to be. You were right. Phil

29:33

and Selmo. Oh, from Phil. Oh, he's the

29:35

other guy from Pantera. That's what I was asking. That's

29:38

what I was going to say. Yeah. He's

29:40

a big, I don't think he's a nice guy. Yeah, he

29:43

pissed off Dimebag Darrell and then Dimebag got shot. It's

29:45

really very sad actually. Well, these

29:47

are the updates. I think we learned

29:49

a lot about nothing.

29:53

And now it's time to get some new stories. But for that, let's

29:56

bring in our guest. Yes. Right

29:58

from North Lane. And

30:00

now we have a very

30:02

old friend Very

30:08

old friend of LPN It

30:11

is so good to have you in studio with us

30:13

to check out some of these horrible stories Dan Saint

30:15

Germain Long time listener first

30:17

time guests Glad to be here Nice

30:20

to see you buddy, you're here promoing

30:22

your new special dance fatty dance Dance

30:24

fatty dance LPN network Check

30:27

it out. It's on YouTube for free.

30:29

Yeah, and I think it's I think

30:31

it's pretty funny. Yeah, that's a solid

30:33

pitch Yeah, fine. I you feel like

30:35

you could might enjoy it cock

30:37

a little yeah I

30:41

don't want to go total Sholsy Schultz

30:43

where I'm like this is fucking next

30:45

level, you know, like what I don't

30:47

want to be like Was this a piece of

30:49

like filthy we're hopping boogie nights like fucking this

30:51

piece of shit Well, that's sad and kind of

30:53

scary, you know, yeah Yeah,

30:56

because also it's never Changing

30:59

everything I find it when someone says

31:02

that it is it's definitely not definitely

31:04

not. Yeah. No There's a

31:07

few instances like when they went when

31:09

they like let Jackie Robinson play

31:11

that that probably changed everything A

31:14

couple change everything that changed everything when

31:16

Marlon Brando didn't take the Oscar and

31:19

he sent that Italian woman changed

31:21

everything She

31:24

not she wasn't native american she was Italian

31:26

absolutely not fucking hilarious Love it love it.

31:28

Oh my god, that's hilarious All

31:32

right. So here we go. Dan. This is gonna

31:35

be you're gonna love this story. Yes. All right

31:37

So now this was uh, I actually find this

31:39

extremely interesting a 10 year old

31:41

allegedly confesses to randomly killing a

31:43

stranger When he was seven, so

31:46

this is in texas. Obviously, um this 10

31:48

year old child According to

31:50

the daily beast the texas

31:52

the child nonchalantly Confess

31:55

to killing a man. Yeah, like

31:58

executed him as the man That's

32:01

the dead man. That's not the child. I

32:04

wish that was the child. He looks like an amalgamation of

32:06

us. Yeah, he never made

32:08

a single correct choice. If you die, unfortunately,

32:10

and this is not, I'm trying not to

32:12

victim blame here, but if you die in

32:14

a trailer, sitting in a chair, getting your

32:16

face blown wide open by a seven-year-old. I

32:18

think he was dead asleep though. He

32:21

did completely dead asleep. He shot him in the

32:23

face. Just asking for it. Took

32:25

his grandpa's gun and went and shot him in

32:28

the face, and then the grandpa ended up stealing

32:30

the gun, not knowing that this happened. So

32:32

he thought he just killed himself. So apparently,

32:34

they said it was suspicious

32:36

because of the angle. He obviously was shot

32:38

in the fucking face. So

32:41

this child apparently was left without

32:43

any form of supervision, and then

32:45

went in, and I guess- This

32:47

was his son? This was- No!

32:49

This is the guy who came in there! This guy had-

32:52

This guy had a stranger. It

32:54

was no motivation whatsoever. Dude, watch

32:56

out for this kid. Dude was

32:58

just asleep. Dude was just asleep.

33:01

And so the kid apparently saw him

33:03

walk by in the trailer. He saw the gun.

33:06

And his grandfather's car that was in the

33:08

front was in the dash compartment, right? He

33:10

pulls it out. The kid just said, like,

33:12

Oh, this is fun. Oh, I've

33:14

got a fun gun. I've seen this on the TV. John

33:17

Wick, you did this. I just

33:19

don't wish they'd read your talk.

33:21

There was like three different acts.

33:23

It went from chimney, sweet British,

33:25

to Kyoto, Japan. SNL,

33:28

stop calling. We

33:30

got Brooks Wheeling over here. Let's come down. You did fine.

33:33

You did fine. You did fine. But

33:35

then he was asleep, and it's just asleep.

33:37

Like a schmuck. And the

33:39

kid walked up to him and just blew

33:42

his fucking brains out. Oh my god. And

33:44

then apparently stood, looked at

33:46

his now fully dead corpse, walked

33:48

back, put the gun back

33:50

into his grandfather's dash compartment, and then

33:53

just walked away. Like

33:55

he was fucking Johnny Cash. Seven

33:58

years old. Yeah. I

34:00

what I think is because you guys

34:02

are you know, it's a burgeoning enterprises

34:04

last podcast on the left And

34:06

you know how Nickelodeon had like kids news. Yes,

34:08

you guys should Do

34:10

like last podcast on the left kids

34:13

news. I would love that to hear

34:15

from his perspective. Yeah sports illustrated for

34:17

kids I know that was nice Reaches

34:20

out to Republicans. Exactly. It's like that type

34:22

of thing. We can still throw Kurt loader

34:24

on to every once in a while Oh,

34:27

yeah, he speaks to the kids. Yeah for

34:29

sure But I would I would bring him

34:31

on bring him into the fold So when

34:33

asked the child stated that he had never

34:35

met Brandon And

34:37

did not know who he was Although

34:39

he'd observed him walking around the RV

34:41

earlier that day The child

34:43

that was also asked if he was mad at

34:45

Brandon for some reason or if Brandon had ever

34:48

done anything to make Him mad and the kid

34:50

said no, I thought that Brandon

34:52

was trying me and I knew that I

34:54

had to Can regulate With

34:58

my child hand and I ended his life

35:00

Yeah I So the child was

35:02

able to direct law enforcement to the gun

35:04

and then so this is where this all

35:07

came from So he just kind of casually said I shot

35:09

a man to watch and this was three years later. Oh,

35:11

yeah Think about he's a kid

35:13

little sitting there smoking a cigarette going like right?

35:15

Yeah, I fucking killed I killed a man two

35:17

years ago Like he was

35:19

like, what was that wrestler that killed

35:21

his molester that killed his molester? Who

35:23

was the wrestler the guy that killed it

35:26

was the I? The

35:29

guy that molested him I'm

35:31

not sure. I know. I mean there's been

35:34

famously a ton of oh that was the

35:36

MMA guy You're talking about Cain Velasquez shot.

35:39

No it that well, he never killed anybody.

35:41

He also killed his molester No, he didn't

35:43

he tried to kill his son's molester and

35:45

ended up shooting the dad of

35:47

the molester So

36:00

the kid... By the way,

36:02

he's seen a dusky innocent. No, I'm just kidding.

36:04

We need to take a look at the evidence

36:06

again. Was that guy a... That guy was a

36:08

wrestler who did that though? That was another wrestler

36:11

who... Oh no, this is a guy. This is a

36:13

famous guy, Gary Plowshay. This is a famous story of

36:15

a guy that shot... I have no idea what this

36:17

is. He shot the guy that molested his daughter as

36:19

he was on his way into court. He popped out

36:22

from behind me. I saw that, yeah. That's

36:24

the guy who did that. He shot him from

36:26

as he was walking into court. He

36:29

also got... How many years did he get?

36:32

He had a bunch of time. There was another story. I think

36:34

he got off, right? He didn't get

36:36

a lot of time. You gotta get in

36:38

trouble for that, unfortunately. Unfortunately. Wait, no, no.

36:41

He was sent a seven year suspended

36:43

sentence with five

36:45

hours probation and 300 hours of

36:48

Q's. Having said that, if

36:50

you go to prison as a guy

36:52

who murdered your kid's

36:55

pedophile, you are a...

36:57

I feel like they treat you

36:59

good. You're Tom Brady. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You

37:02

go in there, you're a maid. Yeah, you can do whatever you want.

37:04

Yeah. I didn't imagine they'd treat him

37:06

all right. Yeah, they treat him all right. The guy

37:08

that I was talking about was Marty Gennady. Marty Gennady?

37:11

No, that was... I understand. We've

37:13

covered... I have a wrestling podcast,

37:15

Wrestle Roast, that's turning into working

37:18

stiff, but it's me, Robert Carpel, Mike Lawrence,

37:20

and Scott Chaplin, a very funny gentleman. Marty

37:24

Gennady said that he murdered

37:26

this guy who molested him

37:28

at a bowling alley or

37:30

tried to molest him, and

37:33

it's all bullshit. He's just one of those guys who just

37:35

lies all the time. He starts saying some stuff. Because they

37:37

investigated it and the police had to come out and be

37:39

like, yeah, I think he... I

37:41

never told no one this, even my

37:43

brother Gino. Yeah. Because

37:46

Gino would have killed him and I didn't want my brother

37:48

gone. Hell, he only recently

37:50

come home from Vietnam. I

37:52

was 13 working at Victory Lane's

37:54

bowling alley, buying weed from a fucker

37:56

that worked there, and he put his

37:58

hands on me. He dragged me around the

38:01

back of the building. You already know what he was

38:03

gonna try to do. That's what

38:05

he said. And then he said that was the first time he made a

38:07

man disappear. He

38:09

talks like a Huckleberry Finn character. Yeah.

38:13

It's a really down story. Yeah, I made him

38:15

disappear, Bob. But he also

38:18

said something very uncomfortable at his daughter

38:20

on Facebook. He's not a, yeah, yeah.

38:22

He's not well. I'm off-boarding for him.

38:24

He's not well. He's not well. All

38:27

right, good for Marty. Thankfully, he'll

38:29

be here next week as

38:31

our guest on Side Story. Yeah, I

38:33

can't wait. I would feel honored if

38:36

I shared the dais with Marty Gennetti. I

38:40

love that guy. But the kid was, all right, so

38:42

back to the kid, it's weird you said it, but

38:44

it totally makes sense.

38:46

While the child was too young to face

38:48

criminal charges for the incident, he was just

38:50

recently pulled from a bust because he was

38:52

charged for making a terroristic threat to another

38:54

student. So he's already ready. This kid's fucking,

38:56

yeah. Fuck this kid. Marty

38:59

Gennetti. Yeah. Yeah, dude.

39:02

You gotta put a tracker on that kid.

39:05

That's scary. I think they did, actually. Yeah,

39:07

it's called Juve. No,

39:10

he got nothing. He had nothing. Absolutely

39:13

nothing. Oh, why? Under 10,

39:15

you can't get convicted for murder. That's

39:18

why. Really? And yet,

39:20

we should be using to fucking kill

39:22

people. Child assassins

39:25

would be an incredible business.

39:29

We put them on the human traffickers and we call

39:31

the children of the poor. Oh

39:33

my God, you guys are just printing. This

39:36

is called printing money. Is

39:39

this the printing money network? I'm

39:44

just smelling those dollar bills. Yeah,

39:46

all we do is make great ideas. I

39:48

came up with Hose Spice, the idea of

39:50

anything. I remember that. I went through that,

39:52

yeah. And then Natalie shut down OK Groomer,

39:54

the pet service that comes to you. OK

39:58

Groomer. OK Groomer. And. She

40:00

was mad at that because she said, you know,

40:02

that sounds like everybody who works at, okay, groomer

40:04

is gonna get murdered by somebody that

40:06

like a common pizza guy. I'm also, because

40:08

we're talking about pedophiles, I'm thinking grooming, like,

40:11

okay, groomer. Yes. Like

40:14

it's a pedophile who tells tall tales.

40:16

Okay, groomer. We've

40:19

heard it before. Okay, Dan Schneider,

40:22

we get it. You were the

40:24

second guy with Jambane Ramsey. We've

40:27

heard it. You were there before it was cool. It

40:31

does work actually. I don't know how we didn't think

40:33

about that. There's another revenge murder in the news, if

40:35

you guys want to check it out, please. A

40:37

ram has killed a New

40:39

Zealand couple. Actually, this

40:41

one's fucked. This is like, they went

40:44

to go, they went on a, what

40:46

do they call it? They went to go check on

40:48

them, a welfare check on these very, very old people.

40:50

They were in their 80s. Yeah. And

40:52

when they went out there, the old man,

40:55

I guess, went out there to feed

40:57

the ram or some shit. It

40:59

was a rogue ram. It wasn't their ram.

41:01

Oh, it was rogue? Yeah, it was a

41:03

rogue ram. They didn't own it. I don't

41:05

think many people own rams. They're

41:08

not like, ram is different than sheep. I could

41:10

be an idiot, but I'm pretty

41:12

sure that ram are their own thing. Dodge

41:14

rams. That's right. Well, that's what they-

41:16

Thank you, he already made a joke. That's what they should have

41:18

done. That's what I'm saying. He dodged the ram. That was what

41:20

he was saying before the show and I didn't approve. Yeah.

41:24

I didn't approve the joke. Thank you, I

41:26

know. I'm just bringing out, you know, bringing

41:28

out those at midnight puns. Many small flock

41:30

owners have just one ram, which

41:32

needs to be separated at some point. That makes

41:34

sense. Because the ram's got a fuck. The ram's

41:36

the one that fucks all the rest of them.

41:38

Oh, the ram is like the rooster of the

41:40

sheep community? I'm just saying stuff too, buddy. I'm

41:43

also just saying stuff, but I'm pretty certain

41:45

that that's true. They had some sheep, some

41:47

chickens, and some cattle. But they killed it.

41:50

So basically they showed up. The old man

41:52

went out to go feed the sheep or

41:54

some fucking garbage. The ram immediately murdered them.

41:57

I don't know if you call it murder with the ram. I

42:00

don't think it's murder. I think it's just you

42:02

know, they were killed by an animal But then

42:04

the old lady was like wish my husband and

42:06

she wanted to go look for him back out

42:09

and they ran And

42:11

got her too, isn't that was that Spanish

42:13

horror movie that came out last year where

42:15

they're looking at the go when evil lurks

42:17

when evil Or a scene from what evil

42:20

or you see lamb. I haven't

42:22

seen. I mean lamb fucking rocks Like

42:26

Like the half-man half lamb or whatever that's

42:29

some good shit. It's really fucking weird But

42:32

then the police came because I guess

42:35

that's who you call because they showed up they found the two people

42:37

Fucking rammed to death. Yeah in

42:40

their pen and then the fucking

42:42

ram bowed up at the cops

42:45

And they had to light them up and shot

42:47

the ram in the head squared up Oh, yeah,

42:49

dude, that Ram was coming in that Ram didn't

42:51

want it. He said he was not driving He

42:53

was traveling He

42:55

says that he broke his contract By

42:58

not signing his license. He says that legally I

43:00

can't have a license. I'm a ram That

43:03

guy looks like he's upset from having to kill

43:05

the ram. I think it's not fun I think

43:07

that we we actually did cover like

43:09

a not funny statistic talking about how many dogs

43:11

police officers have shot like, you know That's not

43:13

and how they just don't give a shit at

43:15

all That's not fun But I don't think like

43:17

anybody's like super jazz But I do feel like

43:20

if you just got to kill another type of

43:22

animal even that's kind of sad I think once

43:24

the Ram killed the second person it signed its

43:26

own death warrant. Oh, yeah, then it's the son

43:28

of ram Yeah, yeah, it's like a serial killer.

43:30

Yeah, yeah, they had to kill it I

43:32

honestly didn't think New Zealand cops even

43:34

killed two people that you two people

43:39

That's more than Mark David Chapman

43:45

He is a very that is

43:47

a murderous animal did oh my

43:49

goodness Well shout out to them

43:52

shout out to who the dead people. Oh fine

43:55

I guess but also 80s 80s

43:57

is hard. You gotta people work long

44:00

into the ratings, you're like, I just don't understand

44:02

people who have that type of like hardcore, like

44:04

my Chris who works on your pretty face is

44:06

going to hell, who worked on your pretty face

44:08

is going to hell. His father is

44:11

like 85 years old and

44:13

he's still like manages vintage apple

44:15

orchards and shit and it's like

44:17

the only thing my father can

44:19

do is smoke. Yeah. And

44:21

I don't know how they get to that. I don't

44:23

know how they, I mean, that's a hard job.

44:26

Apple orchard. It's just out there all

44:28

day. And vintage? What

44:30

does that mean? He saves

44:32

apple lineages. So he

44:35

goes in front like, this is a very

44:37

specific role in society.

44:39

Yeah. People

44:42

killed by animals. That's gotta be like

44:44

very rare in general, right? Gotta be

44:46

surreal. I've known lots of dead people

44:48

in my life. Not

44:51

one of them was killed by an animal. You have alibis?

44:53

Pre-quendinal? Yeah, I do. I do.

44:56

I'm at lots of restaurants. I'm

45:00

at lots of restaurants, lots of movies. Around

45:02

201 deaths annually. Yeah,

45:05

it's not that much. Cause again, we don't

45:07

have, it's not like we're only in America.

45:09

That's only in America. We're not in a

45:11

quote unquote agrarian culture anymore. Yeah. Well, I'm

45:13

trying to write this new bit about like,

45:16

you know, my sympathy for your

45:18

crocodile death depends on what area

45:20

of the world you're from. Like if you're

45:22

from Indonesia, I'm like, I feel bad cause you were just trying

45:25

to fish for your family. But if you

45:27

like, you were in Florida or something, it's like

45:29

you were trying to, it's like this

45:31

fucking croc thinks it's better than me. I guess

45:33

your fault. The more

45:35

first world nation it is, the more fault it

45:38

is. Do you ever see that video of it

45:40

was a little old lady and she has a

45:42

very, very tiny dog on a leash and you're

45:44

watching her fight this little dog. It looks like

45:47

a fucking Looney Tunes cartoon. Where it's this little

45:49

dog going, barf, barf, barf, barf. At this alligator,

45:52

just like over out to Sierra net and this little

45:54

dog and she's like, come on, come on. And the,

45:56

barf, barf, barf. This, the alligator

45:58

just takes the fucking dog. and

46:00

the lady in one go like yeah, it's like the

46:02

dog hits the back of the alligators throat and the

46:04

fucking chomps on his arm And it literally just pulls

46:06

the lady like just kills him both. Yeah, it just

46:08

sucks them right in the lake man It's not cool.

46:10

Where do you get those videos? I'll send you some

46:12

later Sent

46:16

into us We have

46:18

another super morbid one. I want to sit I'm not

46:20

dance here. All right, we can do more of it

46:22

Yeah, this one's really fucked up. This is fucking yeah,

46:24

you'll like this one. Yeah, a Horrible

46:27

is this horrible video

46:29

is this Brazil? No, I want to do the

46:31

first one I wanted to do with the dude getting

46:33

lit up. Okay. Yeah, let's do that because already caught talked

46:35

about it with the ram So this is just I

46:37

just wanted to show you this video you can get this

46:40

reaction This is like this fuck so this is in

46:42

the Seattle Police Department Mamma named

46:44

chief Adrian Diaz so a guy so they

46:46

had set up a sting at a

46:49

double tree Which

46:51

makes sense where they were setting up an

46:53

old man to come and I guess 67

46:57

They say the they call it

46:59

a meeting between two young

47:01

girls So seven ages seven and eleven and

47:03

unless they're very there to do candy sampling

47:05

for Hershey's Yeah, I don't think that it's

47:07

like a meeting. You know, I mean I

47:10

think they're there to have sex with these

47:12

little girls and so what the

47:14

cops are there They set it up as

47:16

a sting and they show the video this

47:18

is dash cam footage from inside of the

47:21

Room so they were waiting for him to come in

47:24

and so if you want to pull up the video I just want to show it

47:26

to these a Dan will not

47:28

this one. Not this one. We're gonna that's next

47:39

Unfortunate man, it is unfortunate

47:41

so they were so these two police officers were

47:43

inside of the the hotel room and then all

47:45

of a sudden they I guess they Were waiting

47:47

for this dude because he was supposed to come

47:49

in and they were they were just gonna grab

47:51

him and then this fucking happened Dude,

48:01

it's right! My God! Dude,

48:04

yeah, that guy didn't stand a chance. That's fucked up.

48:08

Alright, cut it. So this guy was like, he came

48:10

in, the reason why it's truly crazy is that that

48:12

guy was coming in with a gun ready. He

48:14

thought that those little girls with the

48:17

little girl handler were in that room

48:19

with the police, but then you saw the dude

48:22

as he pulled it up. That was a crazy

48:24

move by the cop because the cop put, he

48:26

did, I guess with this guy, a perfectly executed

48:28

defensive maneuver where he grabbed a gun. He grabbed

48:31

the gun and he pressed it to his chest

48:33

and then he shot himself in the arm, but

48:35

then those two just got, they just lit him

48:37

up. So do you think this guy was coming

48:40

to kill the people who held the children? I

48:42

think that he was coming to steal the children. Do

48:44

you think he was coming to steal? He wasn't like

48:46

some weird vigilante? I mean either way, it was a

48:48

bad move. It was definitely a bad move. You

48:50

don't pull a gun out of the cop. I

48:53

say you're going to... That's the actual sound of

48:55

freedom. You

49:01

know, what if, oh God, I guess if it was a

49:03

water gun it would be bad because if that was a

49:05

funny joke, that would be a funny joke for

49:08

a human trafficker to play, wouldn't it? And

49:10

then I also wonder if

49:12

you were to... You're going

49:14

to bring

49:16

cereal and candy. Well, yeah,

49:19

I just think, I don't know, I

49:21

think there's something too like all these

49:23

people who have been fucking weaponized by

49:26

anti-fucking misinformation.

49:28

Oh yeah, of course. So

49:30

you think that he's saying that that guy

49:32

is, you're saying that that guy was scared

49:35

of his own pedophilic activities and so he

49:37

brought a gun to protect himself? I think

49:39

he was posing as a pedophile to go

49:41

to get these children and become

49:44

a hero and then the cops killed them. All

49:46

I know is if you're a cop, if you're

49:48

the cop in that situation and you're talking to

49:50

other people, like it's like, oh yeah, I shoot

49:52

this kid, he was 16, he was sick, he

49:54

felt terrible and he goes, oh really? I just,

49:57

you know, just killed a pedophile that was about to

49:59

shoot. Oh shit, he gets into work,

50:01

he gets a free milkshake. Yeah,

50:07

no, this cop's definitely not going to buy a

50:09

drink for the rest of his life. But they're

50:12

saying here that- That's the best way to kill

50:14

somebody. Yeah. So this guy,

50:16

so they were conducting an internet crimes

50:18

against children tax force operation. So

50:20

that's what that, that's what I guess this

50:22

is. So I guess they, well, they do

50:24

the thing that they build a

50:26

case, they have like the, you

50:29

ever, there's a series on TLC,

50:31

I believe, that covers the units

50:33

of the, there are largely

50:36

female officers- To shoot a predator. When

50:40

they, they're cops that

50:42

act like children. Oh yeah. They're the, and

50:44

that they, when they call, like, would they,

50:46

they go like- Do they have little handcuffs

50:48

and- I don't think- It's

50:58

weird, they have these two like very

51:00

slight lady police officers and

51:02

then they are not, then they

51:04

hire a service that is not

51:06

cops, that just sounds like children.

51:09

They get an of age woman

51:11

who will sound like a child

51:13

and they use it to communicate

51:15

with the pedophile to get them

51:17

hooked, right? To get them

51:19

all- So that service is just for the cops?

51:21

What was that? Is that service just for the

51:23

cops? I did just sound like somebody

51:25

who's about to use that

51:28

service. So maybe forget

51:30

what I just said. Is that service just

51:32

for the, just for the

51:34

good? At what level UCB class do they

51:37

teach you? Yeah, act like a child

51:39

for the police. I

51:41

think it's once you get to Matt Messer's home. I

51:45

didn't book SNL, but- Hey, I

51:48

got this new- he's teaching me.

51:50

That crimes against children apparently are up 67%

51:52

from 2022 to 2023. It

51:57

is very, very bad. It's bad?

51:59

That's crazy. right does it I don't

52:02

know I mean it just feels like the internet keeps getting

52:04

bigger so yeah well it's also

52:06

more I think that we're getting a 20 year

52:08

that's crazy and we're paying attention to it a

52:10

lot more because they're you know for a long

52:12

time if you cut you know how long as

52:14

we've been covering true crime and you read about

52:17

how like essentially it wasn't

52:19

a crime to do it into a child until like 1995

52:21

or whatever like a long time no one has cared

52:26

about kids they've been viewed as disposable for

52:28

for and now we're just trying to fix

52:30

that which I think is probably the uptick

52:32

is that it's more so in

52:35

the actual pursuing of it

52:37

yeah by the police the cyber tip

52:39

line received 36.2 million

52:42

reports of suspected child sexual exploitation

52:44

in 2023 and go check out

52:47

Dan St. Germain's I

52:50

have never said there's only

52:53

some things you can hear

52:55

on his back I want

53:01

to say first off like out of all

53:03

the podcasts I've done like last podcast probably

53:05

one of my favorites if not my favorite

53:07

thank you huge fan I got I

53:09

got listening I listened

53:12

to it during my life I'm married

53:14

now but my last breakup oh yeah

53:16

not the one that you guys knew yeah I

53:18

got really too into the Franklin

53:23

cover-up we talked kind

53:26

of ruined my life I don't then the

53:28

Robert Picton stuff I wrote a thriller about

53:30

that and I left like comedy stand up

53:33

for like two years just write thrillers so

53:35

in a lot of ways my favorite podcast

53:37

in other ways to ruin

53:39

my really wrote the Robert Picton screenplay

53:42

right a Robert Picton it's not exactly

53:44

if you know Robert Picton you read

53:46

the screenplay you're like oh this is

53:49

clearly based on that but it's not

53:51

it's it's like an homage

53:54

it's not totally it's it's fiction but

53:56

he's clearly the basis for the character

53:58

it's like a fan you're like like

54:00

you're from a fans perspective yeah I'm

54:02

firmly in the side of the victim during

54:09

the script what if you made me wonder

54:11

now I got here oh you know feeding

54:23

people made out of sausages his like

54:25

I've always wanted to see pictorial of

54:27

the actual like the ideal bat

54:30

the hangout yeah going to the with the

54:32

pig palace doing all I got I so

54:34

into it when I went when I was

54:36

writing it I was a headline the Vancouver

54:38

yuck yucks because I hadn't like left stand-up

54:40

yet and I went around to all

54:43

the spots picked and used to pick up women

54:45

in Vancouver wow

54:47

it was very dark very no I

54:49

didn't pick them up I was I

54:52

admit Sarah at that point I was it was such

54:54

a dark area that when I went into the strip

54:56

club that was the one that felt like a Starbucks

54:58

really really really really bleak

55:06

really bleak down there in Vancouver no it is

55:08

in place there's some places in Vancouver they're tough

55:10

beautiful save but I also hear you hear it's

55:12

wonderful but I have heard that before as well

55:14

even open air drug market that I was

55:16

just walking around there I love the people

55:19

on an edible but yeah oh really it

55:21

was horrible I went there the last time

55:23

we were there they have that it's the

55:25

Walking Dead unfortunately there's like the heroin problem

55:27

is insane yeah downtown Vancouver it's I feel

55:29

bad for them but it's the most blood

55:31

I've seen just open and

55:34

the city and that's a mystery yeah good

55:36

work Canada honestly you beat us

55:38

because it's Dublin and Vancouver is the most

55:42

open blood I've seen places

55:45

yeah New York I saw a lot of blood we'll get you

55:47

there New York's gotten when I was in

55:49

these village I mean I'm living in Queens now but

55:51

people just shooting up right and oh

55:53

yeah right and by the way I just got

55:55

out of rehab again in December yeah and the

55:59

kids on drugs now in their early

56:01

20s. Like

56:04

I'm never gonna hear anybody like say that

56:06

the 70s party hardest that our generation partied

56:08

hardest these kids are on

56:10

medical grade fentanyl and end-of-life drugs still

56:12

a lot and they're They're

56:15

super sure it's basically like comparing

56:17

the NBA before they left black

56:19

people You

56:22

know what I mean like we're the white we're the

56:24

white NBA kids are

56:26

like when When

56:28

Jordan showed up they're taking a hose

56:31

spice drugs They're taking like like I

56:33

can't you can't understand them. They don't

56:35

fuck they just go You

56:39

know, I can handle and I'm like, yeah,

56:41

you're right I couldn't no no I just like alcohol

56:44

Yeah, yeah, the post Malone generation.

56:46

Oh, dude, it's it's crazy A

56:51

lot of my faces to 70%

56:54

want to be DJ's. Yeah. Hey, that's a

56:56

fucking great entry-level career for anybody who loves

56:58

fentanyl. It's a real job No, it

57:01

is sorta. That's fine. Well, I'm glad that

57:03

you're good. Good. Yeah six months back Bad

57:07

dance fatty dance check it out,

57:09

baby Summer

57:12

the best time of year usually doesn't

57:14

come with a great deal soaring temperatures

57:16

come with soaring prices But what if

57:18

there's another way with IKEA your summer

57:20

plans can last longer than two weeks of

57:23

vacation and be more affordable Here

57:25

everyone can have lounge chair access

57:28

no reservations needed from affordable outdoor

57:30

furniture to stylish accessories We have all

57:32

the essentials you need to soak up summer

57:34

in style No matter the size of your

57:37

space start planning a better summer with IKEA.

57:39

It's your outdoor dreams inside your budget On

57:43

May 10th Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes

57:46

is coming to IMAX and theaters everywhere

57:52

This summer one movie event will

57:54

rain Kingdom

58:05

of the Planet of the Apes only in

58:07

theaters May 10. Tickets on sale now. Rated

58:09

PG-13. Some material may be inappropriate for children

58:11

under 13. Time

58:14

for a quick break to talk about McDonald's.

58:16

Mornings are for mixing and matching at McDonald's.

58:18

For just $3, mix and match two of

58:21

your favorite breakfast items, including a sausage

58:23

McMuffin. We're

58:56

just trying to get out of our current beastiality cycle like

58:58

we're trying to get out of it. It's just been a

59:00

lot. It's hard not

59:02

to mention it. But then we're getting into

59:05

the updates and then I'm talking about the

59:07

other discuss. We gotta stop talking. The problem

59:09

is with your personality although you want to

59:11

get out of it I don't know if

59:13

that's possible for you. I'm locked into this

59:15

antagonistic. I feel like you have to talk

59:17

about horse clips. I can't. We did it last

59:20

week. I know. My hands are tied. I don't

59:22

know what to do. This is me. Your hooves

59:24

are tied. I don't want them. Did

59:27

I tell you I used to be

59:29

a movie usher at the IFC. Oh I remember

59:31

that. This is a true story. You got fired.

59:34

I quit but I got

59:36

thrown out by the projection or cartoon.

59:38

He threw me out because I was

59:40

drunk watching wrestling results. But

59:42

anyway I was there. This was about

59:45

a day after Baldwin had

59:47

called his daughter a fat pig on

59:49

The View. We were showing that documentary

59:51

about Mr. Hands the guy who got

59:53

fucked to death by a horse and

59:55

died. Yes. At 10 a.m. this is

59:58

the day after Baldwin got canceled. He

1:00:00

came in to watch the first showing

1:00:03

of that movie. The

1:00:05

horse fucking movie. Yeah,

1:00:07

dude. Hour and a

1:00:09

half later, hour and a half later, I

1:00:11

hear from the back of my ear, I hear, Disturbing,

1:00:16

wasn't it? And I turn around

1:00:18

and go, Ooh, I can't believe.

1:00:20

And I'm like, somehow I think

1:00:22

that led to the rush shooting.

1:00:26

I don't know. I have

1:00:28

like my JFK, the little

1:00:30

arrows going everywhere. There

1:00:33

were horses on set. What

1:00:36

is the craziest, like why would you, like, what

1:00:38

a looney tune? He's like, he had to relax.

1:00:40

He's been, I'm getting a lot of heat. A

1:00:43

lot of heat. I don't know why.

1:00:49

But the cycle that we're currently stuck

1:00:51

in is fucking people,

1:00:55

weekend at Bernie's, in

1:00:58

people. It is this idea

1:01:00

of people using other people's corpses for

1:01:02

monetary gain. This is going

1:01:05

to be the third story we

1:01:07

have covered in as many weeks over someone

1:01:09

doing it. Part of me, I wonder if

1:01:11

they influence each other. Yes, if

1:01:13

it's like almost like copycatting style. I'm

1:01:16

in the middle of Brazil, so I don't know if they got our

1:01:18

news down there. All right. So this comes, yeah, this is in Brazil.

1:01:21

A woman brought a man in a wheelchair into a

1:01:23

South American bank, but, uh, an attempted to take a

1:01:25

loan out on his name, but the man

1:01:27

had been dead for hours. Erika de

1:01:29

Sousa Vieira Nunez, 42, was arrested

1:01:31

Tuesday following the bizarre incident in Bangu,

1:01:34

a neighborhood in western Rio de

1:01:36

Janeiro. A

1:01:38

woman claimed that the man identified by police

1:01:40

as 68-year-old Paulo Wrobarco Braga was her uncle

1:01:42

and wanted to sign papers for a $3,250

1:01:44

loan. And

1:01:47

then when he arrived at the bank, it was very much so,

1:01:49

a dead man. And the best

1:01:51

part is that this woman was so concerned

1:01:53

with positioning her dead uncle into a way

1:01:56

that would make him look like he was

1:01:58

alive, that

1:02:00

the teller was actively filming her do

1:02:03

this and she's like smiling next to the body.

1:02:06

So they're into burnages never as fun as you think

1:02:08

it's gonna be. I know it's not because of the

1:02:10

sink and it's the sallow

1:02:12

open mouth stare of a corpse. That's

1:02:14

a real corpse right there. Oh

1:02:17

yeah yeah yeah so this is a video. She

1:02:22

is music? She is holding up his hand and then... Is that

1:02:24

one of the aliens from Mac and me? Sir.

1:02:28

Man we did it Joe. That's

1:02:34

what it looks like. But she really isn't asking

1:02:36

for that much though. That's my thing. It's like

1:02:38

if you're gonna do this I would at least

1:02:40

go for 10k. Well I think that's probably why

1:02:42

she should have gotten it. I

1:02:46

also... This shows the desperation to

1:02:49

get it but this guy is extremely

1:02:51

dead and the way she's operating

1:02:54

his hands like he is gonzo. Yeah. Like

1:02:56

he is doing it like he is a

1:02:58

muppet. Like she's just moving his head back

1:03:00

and forth. Oh wow. He's like going like

1:03:02

hey pay attention pay attention. Smack in his

1:03:04

face. Make him go oh yes.

1:03:07

I mean the teller's filming everything.

1:03:09

Yeah. Because it's so obvious unfortunately.

1:03:11

Unbelievable. You know and I just...

1:03:15

I don't have a single dead person I have access

1:03:17

to. I just want to try it once. You will.

1:03:19

Okay if I'll give this...

1:03:22

You know what I will give the last podcast

1:03:24

network permission to use my body

1:03:26

for a bit. Is that... That's safe. Thank you. Yeah.

1:03:28

It's safe. That's safe. We are going to do that.

1:03:30

We're going to use that. That is... I'm not leaving

1:03:33

my wife about it first but yeah. Well I mean...

1:03:35

She probably won't be happy. She's already out of the...

1:03:37

You know. She'll have left me at that point. Yeah.

1:03:40

Let's face it. No because then she'll

1:03:42

get you after. Undercover Underage. Yes.

1:03:44

Undiscovery Plus. That's so weird that it just

1:03:46

came up like that actually.

1:03:49

Yeah this show is called Undercover Underage. It looks

1:03:51

like every West Coast comedy book right back there.

1:03:53

Oh my god. Yeah. It

1:03:55

does. Jordan Jensen. The Cops

1:03:57

and Rios said they've never seen anything like

1:03:59

this. Well, that's but that's one of the

1:04:01

murder capitals of the world. Yeah, dude. That's in

1:04:03

Rio de Janeiro. Yeah, that is crazy It has

1:04:06

to be absolutely insane. All right, let me do

1:04:08

we got anything else anything we want to cover?

1:04:10

I wanted to get a quick You

1:04:13

know, we got a problem here Dan. I'm sure this

1:04:15

hurts you Red Lobster is

1:04:17

Considering chapter 11 break up see now. This

1:04:19

is no shit Yeah, I'm really happy

1:04:21

that we we did if we had to

1:04:24

oh we had open death. We had

1:04:26

a corpse Yeah, but now I think it's

1:04:28

important to get to one of the main

1:04:30

stories You were gonna try to cover this

1:04:32

week was the red lobsters red lobsters going

1:04:34

away. Yeah Yeah, and it's and guess who

1:04:36

they're shifting the blame to us immigrants. No us

1:04:38

Yeah, cuz we ate too much of the endless

1:04:41

shrimp. They legitimately say America

1:04:45

has devastated Do

1:04:50

it once a week and then after COVID they had

1:04:52

to get That

1:04:54

guy like weeping And

1:04:57

we had no idea how much shrimp

1:05:01

that could eat and then One

1:05:04

man would come and he'd bring a

1:05:06

bigger man And I'm like,

1:05:08

oh he certainly won't just be and

1:05:10

then he'd be ordering the shrimp and

1:05:12

I figured well Don't you want a

1:05:14

steak man? Don't you want one of

1:05:16

our delectable pasta dishes? They

1:05:19

lost 11 million dollars in the third

1:05:21

quarter last year and shrimp Like

1:05:27

that much to me maybe I just think

1:05:29

we're fatter than we I think that

1:05:32

we're fatter and then maybe Shrimps

1:05:34

are smaller What look

1:05:36

the only thing we're gonna really admit. I mean I like

1:05:38

red lobster, but cheddar red biscuits are the only I mean

1:05:40

They're gonna sell those biscuits. Yeah. Yeah, I make sure I

1:05:42

make the cheddar biscuits at home and they make we make

1:05:44

them better I would just say

1:05:47

if you're like outback make an aggressive move to

1:05:49

get the cheddar big biscuits I said that's a

1:05:51

really good Some of

1:05:53

them or this is a good chance for sizzler

1:05:55

to put their ass back on the map. Yeah

1:05:58

sizzler should go I've

1:06:00

never been to the bubble. I'm

1:06:03

good. No, it's not. I've like

1:06:05

Lawrence a couple times. He likes going

1:06:07

there, but it's horrible He eats shrimp

1:06:09

chips You

1:06:12

know, you know guy who runs writing seminars

1:06:14

now He's

1:06:16

shrimp chips from a bag That's

1:06:19

when we knew him God,

1:06:21

but a bread lobster was kind of fine

1:06:24

though. I feel like red lobster I liked

1:06:26

my meal at red lobster more than these

1:06:28

other chains. That's why I think that sizzler

1:06:30

has an opportunity I think sizzler for

1:06:32

it bubblegum is bad out back.

1:06:34

What's wrong bubblegum out backs? Okay, the wings

1:06:37

are pretty good at out back. It was

1:06:39

surprising the capourie or couture I don't know

1:06:41

how last I will get your producer like

1:06:43

he's gonna know No, I would ask you

1:06:45

if there's one power it's delicious

1:06:47

the wings that I had there were fucking delicious

1:06:49

Yeah, last time I went to also a piece

1:06:51

of trash and I was relapsing when I had

1:06:53

those There

1:06:56

are the most understandable part of

1:06:58

it. Oh, of course. Yeah, those

1:07:00

are relapse that was the wings

1:07:02

are so good I this is

1:07:04

how it was in Detroit. I was supposed to go home

1:07:06

I got too drunk and ate the wings and I

1:07:09

just stayed another night at a motel near the air

1:07:12

My wife the next day. Yeah, why not? Let me

1:07:15

go on another rehab trip guys. I yeah Not

1:07:19

worth it is not worth it wings. It's

1:07:21

just wings Well, you're really good. They're really

1:07:23

good way More

1:07:28

dead mom stuff. We'll talk about that

1:07:31

on brighter side tomorrow Doing

1:07:34

you're gonna come do brighter side

1:07:36

stories, but you're doing with the

1:07:38

dead parents. No Yeah,

1:07:42

no, I'll I'll bring it up though, but

1:07:44

yeah the capillary capillary wings are good. Well,

1:07:47

I'm just glad they brought you back I'm

1:07:51

glad that you're here today. Dan. I'm

1:07:54

always glad to see you guys. I miss you guys. Yeah,

1:07:56

this has been great Is there anything? Oh, you gotta make

1:07:58

we got Dan a gift Oh,

1:08:00

you did? Yeah, we got you a gift, Bob. Can

1:08:02

you- I said no gifts. Yeah, we got

1:08:04

you a gift. We got you a gift. Here

1:08:06

you go. This is for you. I

1:08:08

hope you like it. I hope you like

1:08:10

it. This is my dad's movie. His father

1:08:13

wrote the film, the new

1:08:15

film, Freud's Last Session. And we

1:08:17

got Dan a sign

1:08:20

of us signing. We signed Marcus Ed and

1:08:22

I signed a poster for your father. True

1:08:29

Father's Film for you. I want to give this to

1:08:31

my- Dan's

1:08:33

father wrote Freud's Last Session. It was in the

1:08:35

theater. He's a little bit- He's a little bit

1:08:37

bummed out because it was more of a bomb

1:08:40

than he thought. So now I don't

1:08:42

think we giving him this poster is going to help.

1:08:46

No, but my

1:08:48

carny friend signed

1:08:51

it because they got it clearly for free

1:08:53

in some package. Yeah, it was- If you're

1:08:55

giving it away, it's a movie theater when

1:08:57

I went. That's one of the great- He

1:09:00

stole it from the trash. So like that origin story

1:09:02

is going to depress the fuck out of him. This

1:09:06

is amazing. I think he was still playing. Hey,

1:09:11

check it out now, Freud's Last. Great play.

1:09:14

You know, like the great, great play and they

1:09:16

adapted it, you know, but

1:09:18

it is, I think Amazon, you can

1:09:20

rent it. Apparently Anthony Hopkins is fine.

1:09:23

Hey, Anthony Hopkins. Yeah, he can't be good

1:09:25

to- Yeah, he can't see Hopkins. Yeah, he

1:09:27

does his job. Did your dad get to

1:09:30

meet Anthony Hopkins? Yes. Well, at least there's

1:09:32

that. They softly kiss. No. He

1:09:36

did meet Anthony Hopkins. Yeah,

1:09:39

my dad, I don't know how I became

1:09:42

such a fucking low rent

1:09:44

art form. No, comedy, have

1:09:46

you not seen the internet?

1:09:48

Comedy is the most important art form

1:09:50

that there's ever been. We are the

1:09:53

only ones speaking truth to power. We're

1:09:55

the only ones saying the right stuff

1:09:57

about vaccines, about race and gender issues.

1:10:00

I don't know about you guys I get more

1:10:02

news from the Daily Show than I do the real

1:10:04

news I

1:10:08

don't even have any honestly. I don't

1:10:10

even need these letters. We'll do the we'll do letters

1:10:13

next week All right, I am the only letter I

1:10:15

have it's like it's fun. It's actually all right. You

1:10:17

know I'll do this one last letter for Dan Okay, well

1:10:19

my you know I just just just prove I have like

1:10:21

time to kill before my dinner And I just want to

1:10:23

hang out with you guys And

1:10:26

I also want to get a higher approval rating than

1:10:28

hold it Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, we need it But

1:10:30

yeah, let us know how Dan did if you're paired

1:10:33

to Holden specifically You have if you have us if

1:10:35

one of them had to come back would you rather

1:10:37

be Dan or hold I already know the answer Hey,

1:10:42

hold it got a 53% is a Biden win we talked

1:10:47

We'll be announcing it on Holden's podcast

1:10:51

Here's a one horrible letter. I'll get your response on this

1:10:53

all right. I love your episodes

1:10:56

on Herb Baumeister great Well my

1:10:58

dad who was a big tall man from New York

1:11:00

He had been married twice and had four kids no

1:11:02

one knew a secret Apparently my 52

1:11:04

year old dad likes to wear women's clothing

1:11:07

and participate in BDSM on

1:11:09

Halloween night 2000 he's not the same thing

1:11:11

no no no no no no on Hollywood

1:11:13

night 2000 he put on a contraption

1:11:15

that would lock his hands under his knees so he

1:11:17

could jack off all while choking himself the

1:11:20

next morning he had and showed up to his office which

1:11:22

he owned and ran a Family member went in

1:11:24

and found my dad dead in a face that was pitch-black

1:11:27

Still in that contraption come to find out that when

1:11:29

you exphyxiate your face turns a black comes due to

1:11:31

the lack of oxygen Upon

1:11:34

searching his house they found other items women's clothes

1:11:36

and whatnot and the worst of all was that

1:11:38

my family had an open Casket and there wasn't

1:11:40

enough makeup in the world to make him look

1:11:42

normal his death certificate list the cause of death

1:11:44

is autorotic desiciation Now

1:11:54

that I know this you need to know this Can't

1:11:57

be the only one who lives with this for the rest of

1:11:59

my life. Yeah I had died from

1:12:01

blood That's

1:12:04

the one that's actually the only time you can get

1:12:06

away with black things Sparkly

1:12:16

that should have been the cover If

1:12:20

you're not laughing you're crying by the by the

1:12:22

way I will say I did talk about this

1:12:24

on one podcast But I feel like you

1:12:26

guys are the ones that I really should bring it up to I Did

1:12:29

start wearing two years ago while I was on

1:12:31

the road women's underwear Older

1:12:34

women's underwear. Yeah over 55

1:12:36

because I find I have

1:12:38

a very large ball sack My dick is

1:12:41

very mediocre, but I have a very large

1:12:43

ball sack Me too and I don't if

1:12:45

you have a large ball sack It has

1:12:47

the same dimensions as it was an older

1:12:49

woman's outie pussy so Boxes

1:12:53

where were you? Before

1:12:55

you were a normal box you for Day-to-day

1:12:58

roommates. He's seen a lot of my

1:13:00

grundle before but I Know

1:13:04

what you're working with Oh like mrs. Doubtfire underwear

1:13:06

is the way to go dude. Really? Yeah Great

1:13:15

Not fooling around with your lady that night Cuz

1:13:17

like I've taken that like my Sarah's been into it

1:13:19

and I've taken it off and she's seen him I'm

1:13:21

good. Yeah, is she not do your

1:13:24

laundry? Not

1:13:26

anymore I

1:13:28

do each other's laundry. So it's like I

1:13:30

couldn't have only never trust me with her

1:13:32

laundry. Oh, really? Oh, yeah, why would any

1:13:34

absolutely she would never trust me Julie trusts

1:13:36

you with her clothes Oh great at it. I

1:13:39

could fold I could I had to do chores

1:13:41

when I was a kid Yeah, I wash clothes,

1:13:44

but I don't wash it Natalie special clothes. It's

1:13:46

her special clothes. She's special clothes Yeah, well she

1:13:48

does that weird clothes. Which is the panties. I

1:13:50

don't wash panties Everything

1:13:52

don't put it in the dryer Anything

1:13:55

yeah, you gotta read the labels. Well,

1:13:57

you know, there's actually incredible advice. Yeah

1:14:00

I actually didn't I mean, okay, I love my Tommy

1:14:02

John. I'll say this if you get a nice air

1:14:04

condition You know like just

1:14:06

is there a brand you like I

1:14:08

just got the bloomers that were they were women's

1:14:10

Haynes I believe I believe not

1:14:12

even going for upper level. I'm not even

1:14:14

going for jokes on this. I'm just giving Thank

1:14:18

you. What about your legs? Are you get chased

1:14:20

your big guy? Thanks,

1:14:22

Ed. No, I'm just joking Thinking

1:14:24

about me no, they didn't shave at

1:14:27

all. It's just it's just a nice like well

1:14:29

I'm not these are these are two for too

1:14:31

young I'm

1:14:35

talking about but no, I'm just I

1:14:37

really don't care bloomers. I'm talking about

1:14:40

bloomers like Google bloomers Bloomers

1:14:43

yeah, I've seen bloomers So

1:14:47

it's something like Mary Todd Lincoln, but

1:14:49

like flowery can you flower that's cool

1:14:51

closer is to those there

1:14:53

But flowery bloomers, that's what

1:14:55

I've been I've been wearing. Well. I know what

1:14:58

I'm getting Eddie for his birthday No, I mean,

1:15:00

it's a nice. You know it's it's you know

1:15:02

I appreciate you have an outie pussy or big

1:15:04

balls That's incredible your balls don't go on the

1:15:06

other sides of the thing like like Open

1:15:09

ears I mean like If

1:15:11

I'm like shooting you know like if I need it like

1:15:13

for stand-up I want but if it's a night in and

1:15:15

I just needed to breathe then I

1:15:17

wear women's underwear Yeah, I just wear you

1:15:19

this what you do no judgment now mine's

1:15:21

a little bit. Yeah I bet that's Benjamin

1:15:24

friend. You're playing play boy. Yeah That

1:15:27

is that's Lolita bloomers for

1:15:29

women anything that says Lolita you

1:15:32

are not allowed to purchase Grumpy

1:15:38

asshole Nothing

1:15:42

with a cute name cranberry by

1:15:44

bottom Well, this

1:15:46

has been incredible incredible episode. Thank you

1:15:48

guys for being here today Go to

1:15:50

patreon.com/slash podcast unless if you if you

1:15:52

want to check out all the other

1:15:55

Stuff that we do if you want to see your bodies if you

1:15:57

want to see you behind the scenes when you're there But a tick-tock

1:15:59

at LPL on the left.com. I don't know what it'll be on

1:16:01

the left, whenever it is. TikTok, it's gonna

1:16:03

be gone soon. Then we

1:16:06

go see, then we are going to last podcast on the

1:16:08

left.com. We are going back on tour. And so for those

1:16:11

of you that don't know, there are some of you, I'm

1:16:13

sorry, you're part of the plug section. Oh yeah, for sure

1:16:15

buddy. For sure. So this week

1:16:17

we are doing, and those of you,

1:16:19

I think we have another Patreon, and

1:16:21

we also might release some tickets,

1:16:23

but I don't think we are, I don't know yet. Thursday

1:16:25

and Friday, we are doing our full on, we are writing

1:16:28

our show in front of people. Our

1:16:30

last podcast on the left live show. We

1:16:32

are doing that Thursday and Friday at the

1:16:34

Sirius XM Garage. That's on, if you can. You

1:16:36

are writing it in front, like people are

1:16:38

watching your process. We come up with material,

1:16:40

like we've done this every tour, and then

1:16:42

what we do is, we kind

1:16:44

of like, the first couple of

1:16:46

shows we'll do with no specific

1:16:48

material, we just improv, and then we go from

1:16:50

there. And then we'll go and cobble

1:16:52

it together, and write it after. So

1:16:55

I'm excited. I think it's going to be

1:16:57

fun, you can come see us, and we're really going to be working shit out,

1:16:59

so it's going to be pretty good. And we're going to have to, because Denver's

1:17:01

almost sold out. What are you going to have to do with your show? What

1:17:03

are you guys doing? Yeah, show is coming. Also

1:17:05

this week, I'm going to be on page seven,

1:17:08

so check that out. I'm sitting in for MJ

1:17:10

this week. Oh great. Yeah,

1:17:12

and so I'll be there, and then also Dan is

1:17:14

going to be on Brighter Side Stories. I'm excited. You

1:17:16

guys, the next Denver show, I know you already have

1:17:19

the venue now, but the next one you guys should do

1:17:22

in the underground Denver airport. You

1:17:25

guys have to do it. They're just so, it's

1:17:27

the same thing. Have you ever stayed at the

1:17:30

Watergate in DC? Yeah, they're not. They

1:17:32

like lean in. Also they smell us when

1:17:34

we come in. Oh yeah. They're like, yeah,

1:17:36

you liked it. Put it in the other

1:17:38

room. I want to do it on the

1:17:40

Ramses front yard. There you go. That's

1:17:42

what we'll be doing our follow-up meet and greet over

1:17:45

at the John Monet Ramsey home. So

1:17:47

we'll see you there. Triple

1:17:52

L baby. You know,

1:17:54

live every day. No

1:17:56

one was good for your balls. You be the

1:17:58

arbiter of what's good for your balls. balls and let

1:18:00

everybody tell you what's good for your balls and you

1:18:02

know love the fact that you wear women's underwear but

1:18:04

it's not even about anything it's about comfort. No or

1:18:07

an outie pussy. It's for balls or an outie pussy.

1:18:09

And then laugh especially if you have a big gaping

1:18:11

outie pussy then you have something that can hold it.

1:18:15

Dance fatty dance. Dance fatty dance. I don't

1:18:17

know why I start screaming my plug. Dance

1:18:20

fatty dance is the special on YouTube

1:18:22

please check it out. I also have

1:18:24

a wrestling podcast working stiff and

1:18:26

soon which maybe I'll come back in a year for

1:18:28

this. But not only are going to do a

1:18:31

new podcast we haven't discovered exactly what

1:18:33

it is yet. I want to see Don is Shawn

1:18:35

too. I did have

1:18:37

a horror movie broadcast for like 16 weeks

1:18:39

and then had to end it because of

1:18:41

rehab. But that show was really fun.

1:18:44

But like this is I will be having

1:18:46

a new comedy podcast with Shawn Donnelly coming

1:18:48

out but if you like pro wrestling check

1:18:50

that out. Please please goddamn watch my special

1:18:53

and if and if you like wrestling pray

1:18:55

for me and me and Dan Soder's peacock

1:18:57

show to go. I'll

1:18:59

do it. I'll do it. I'll

1:19:01

come on. Everyone. Chris is a

1:19:04

millionaire. Don't listen. He's going to be

1:19:06

fine. He's going to be fine. Just please please check out

1:19:08

the special. But this is fun and please remind Holden that

1:19:10

I was a better guest. Oh

1:19:20

we will. On Twitter. We

1:19:23

will most certainly do it. Bye bye fuckers. Tell

1:19:26

Satan. This

1:19:30

show is made possible by listeners like you.

1:19:32

Thanks to our ad sponsors. You can support our

1:19:34

shows by supporting them. For more shows like the

1:19:37

one you just listened to. Hear

1:19:51

that? It's the call of the craze. And when the

1:19:53

craze calls you know what to do. Try

1:19:55

the five dollar bacon bundle because the only

1:19:58

thing better than a White Castle slider is

1:20:00

a White Castle slider topped with crispy hickory

1:20:02

smoked bacon. So pick any two of either

1:20:04

the bacon cheese slider, 1921 bacon

1:20:07

cheese slider, or chicken bacon ranch slider. And

1:20:09

also get a small fry for just $5

1:20:12

with the $5 bacon bundle. White

1:20:14

Castle, follow your craves. Walmart

1:20:19

Plus members save on meeting up with friends.

1:20:21

Save on having them over for dinner with

1:20:24

free delivery with no hidden fees or markups.

1:20:26

That's groceries plus napkins, plus that vegetable chopper

1:20:28

to make things a bit easier. Plus, members

1:20:30

save on gas to go meet them in

1:20:32

their neck of the woods. Plus, when you're

1:20:34

ready for the ultimate sign of friendship, start

1:20:37

a show together with your included Paramount Plus

1:20:39

subscription. Walmart Plus members save on this plus

1:20:41

so much more. Start a 30-day free trial

1:20:43

at walmartplus.com. Paramount Plus is central

1:20:45

plan only. Separate registration required. See Walmart Plus terms

1:20:48

and conditions.

Unlock more with Podchaser Pro

  • Audience Insights
  • Contact Information
  • Demographics
  • Charts
  • Sponsor History
  • and More!
Pro Features