Welcome everyone and pull up a seat at the table. It’s Lunchtime in Rome. Tonight’s episode 239 is entitled “Appreciate and Request”. We all want better relationships. We introduced a level up challenge a few weeks ago. Maybe there’s a simpler way. That’s what we’re talking about tonight!

Pull up a seat at the table and join us!

Level Up Challenge…an alternative

* Spending time appreciating

* List 6 areas where you appreciate the other person

* Be specific. looking particularly for things you may have come to take for granted

* Examples

* I’m grateful for your diligence as a provider for our family.

* I’m thankful for your faithfulness and loyalty as a wife.

* I’m thankful for the way you show you care with words and touch.

* I appreciate your sensitivity to others feelings

* Request your needs to be met

* Things you might like to see concerning improvements and changes in this relationship

* Be specific and positive as you look for major items of importance to you

* Examples

* I’m hoping you can become more comfortable initiating affection.

* I’d like to see all cursing and abusive language stop.

* I wish we would not criticize one another in front of others—particularly our children.

* I’d hope that you might speak respectfully to those in authority.

* Share your lists with one another

* Be genuine, showing interest, emotion, and good eye contact, dedicated, private, and unrushed time alone

* Be positive, encouraging, and looking to the future with hope.

* Examples

* It would be important to me if

* It would mean a lot to me if.

* I’m looking forward to the time when

* Benefits

* Sharing your requests helps avoid the destructive cycle of:

* Having expectations and anticipations (i.e. requests) of another person.

* Not communicating these requests.

* But, becoming hurt or angry when these expectations aren’t met! This isn’t fair to either of the parties.

* Exchange lists if it will help you remember some of your partner’s “Requests”

* Practice Appreciation

* Make no further mention of the “Requests” during the next month. (To do so would be to approach “nagging” and actually hinder progress.)

* Make consistent effort to share praise for your “Appreciation” List plus other appreciation that come to mind.

* Look for opportunities to share praise and appreciation

* Privately with one another during daily conversations and private times

* Publicly when in the company of others. like family members, children, or friends

*  In writing with special notes, cards, or gifts

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