Manisha Lamsal didi joins from Kathmandu, Nepal, to talk about the experiences of growing up as a woman in a patriarchal and misogynistic Nepali society. Manisha didi is currently involved in research about hair and its social aspects. A mother of three years old, Manisha didi starts her conversation by going over her story of intercaste marriage. We discuss the many subtle differences we can find between a boy and a girl growing up in the same home and how that affects the social dynamics of all our relationships. The differences cover cultural norms that elders force on their daughters because 20-25 years from now, after marriage, they will be representing their family values to in-laws and hence need to compromise on many things. We also cover the culture of tagging household chores to gender and dismantle the idea that men “help” and women “are responsible.” We also go over how our society has masked the notion that festivals are for celebrations when most of the time, only males relax by playing cards. In contrast, women are expected to be in the kitchen all day to prepare a large variety of dishes.

Towards the end, we discuss and provide ideas to start unlearning the biases and misogynistic ideals we have unknowingly practiced. Manisha didi shares how she has been raising her daughter as well. We also briefly discuss the legal aspects of gender discrimination and why the legal jargon and clauses have made it difficult for women to speak up about their experiences.

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