0:01

Hey, what's going on? It's Bill Byrne. It's time

0:03

for the Monday Morning Podcast for Monday, April 22nd,

0:05

2024. What's

0:10

going on? How are

0:12

ya? How's

0:15

it going? I'll tell you right now, I don't got time for

0:17

this shit. You know

0:19

what I'm saying, man? I'm fucking

0:21

busy Sunday night trying

0:24

to knock this out because I don't got

0:26

time for this shit. I'm coming

0:29

at you guys like an old school dad that's

0:31

doing some shit and he ruins it

0:33

because the whole time he's doing this shit all he does

0:35

is tell you he doesn't have time for this shit. Come

0:38

on, get in that goddamn car. Christ, I don't got time for

0:40

this shit. All right, get

0:42

out of here, you seatbelt. Just fucking sit down and shut the

0:44

fuck up. You goddamn

0:46

motherfucking set this whole fucking thing up. Does she

0:48

tell me? Ma, ma, ma, ma, ma, ma. Let

0:50

me back down the driveway. Does she tell you?

0:52

Of course she doesn't. I'm living

0:55

in her fucking world, her rules. The

0:58

fuck I ever got married for? Quit

1:01

your crime. I don't got time for

1:03

this shit. What

1:07

sums up the dads when I was growing up? Dads

1:09

didn't have time for this shit. Then

1:13

Hollywood took it and realized that I don't have

1:15

time for this shit. Coming

1:17

from a dad saying it to his kids was

1:19

too sad, so they switched it up and they

1:21

turned it into, I'm too old for this shit.

1:24

Then they just had to be about cops that

1:27

were like really

1:29

close to retiring, which is fucking hilarious. I love

1:31

that they're really close to retiring, but they're still

1:33

out in the street having gun battles. It's

1:36

like, what the fuck did you steal out of

1:38

the evidence room that you're still out there doing

1:40

that shit? Shouldn't

1:43

you be behind a desk going, all right, why

1:45

not, you know, Kowalski and fucking Serengeti.

1:49

Serengeti, why don't you guys go down there and

1:51

you go check it. I got a call. There's

1:53

some sort of a gun play down there at

1:55

the crack house. All right. Yeah.

1:58

You got your best son. All right. the

2:01

end of your cop career, not riding on top of

2:04

a bus as you're looking at a bunch of trees

2:06

that are hanging lower than the top of the bus,

2:08

ducking your head going, I'm getting too old for this

2:10

shit. You

2:13

know, well, maybe you should have made some better

2:15

career choices and gotten

2:17

a promotion every once in a while instead of being

2:20

the fucking guy fucking up

2:22

out there, whatever the hell you did. I

2:25

mean, what do you got to do? Let me, any

2:28

cops listening? What the fuck do you have to be

2:30

doing other than wanting to still

2:32

be out there? Let's just get that out of,

2:34

you know, that fucking guy. I

2:37

don't want to be in the office area.

2:39

It's fucking boring. I'm not going to spend

2:41

my last 10 years doing paperwork, but the

2:43

fucking guys that actually wanted

2:45

to be in the office, but

2:48

they're still out there dodging

2:51

bullets. What did they do?

2:53

They did something. You did something. You know what

2:58

I mean? It's like fucking running into somebody. They've been

3:00

in the military for eight years and they still only

3:02

have one stripe on their shirt. It's

3:04

like, ah, you did something. Yeah, no, you come here, you,

3:07

you, you did something. Christ,

3:14

I'm getting too old for this shit. I

3:17

don't got time for this shit. Tell

3:21

you right now, I've had it up to here. Just fucking leave me alone. I

3:25

got time for this shit. I'm

3:28

going to stop it. Anyway,

3:32

um, my

3:35

brain's all over the place. I, uh, it's the

3:38

end of my kids vacations. We had a

3:40

fucking great time. I don't want to

3:42

be so aggressive about it. We had a great time. We had a

3:44

fucking great time. Didn't we kids?

3:48

Sorry. Um,

3:51

yeah, just did a, uh, uh, Just

3:54

some monster dad days. I Made sure

3:56

that I was not on the road

3:58

this week. So every day. We went

4:00

out and we did something. Any know the game

4:02

said we're going away these kids empty right now

4:04

I'm gonna fucking way these kids outs and are

4:06

you kind of do it but they take it

4:08

down with some. It's I

4:10

keep you see somebody drowning and you're not

4:13

a strong swimmer. If you'd go into saved

4:15

them they're going to pull yonder and you

4:17

both can a drought and then people your

4:19

funeral be like rats way was yeah we

4:21

wasn't a kind of guy you love. You

4:25

know sit back and I you know be

4:27

on the sideline say he would go in

4:29

and get involved even if he wasn't good

4:31

at the activity. was about ready to participate

4:33

in that could cause possibly cost him his

4:35

life said ah that's what he did on

4:37

that day. You. But.

4:41

I think I speak for most of us when we

4:43

say. We. Were

4:45

we wouldn't let that complete stranger that had no

4:47

effect on our life go on to by himself.

4:51

But you know that that the way my she was

4:53

y a. P.

4:57

Dot vault. I'm

4:59

I'm the first time he got stabbed. He

5:01

was driving down the street completely safe for

5:03

the car. Saw two people at night fights.

5:06

He pulls over goes in a like mikey

5:08

what the fuck are you doing. And

5:11

he said, you know. I.

5:15

Don't subscribe to be in a passenger in life

5:17

is our was like what the fuck does that

5:19

mean My kid drive and he puts it in

5:21

part. he goes over there yet out before he

5:24

even gets the word out. Get out. Those two

5:26

guys stop fight each other Now the staff and

5:28

mighty. That

5:30

step seventeen times so mouth they

5:33

miss vital organs. Mr.

5:35

Bush Spray and like a fuckin' Goddamn.

5:38

Sprinkler. But. You know

5:41

that's just how he was. He

5:43

got involved in said he didn't need to

5:46

get involved in and now we spotted dead.

5:49

So. Here's.

5:52

Some Isis.

5:56

Series. Evolved

5:58

and some shit that. That good amount

6:00

of position already dead. Anyway,

6:07

I don't even know who won the Celtics? Guess. All

6:10

I know was that Jamie Fox wasn't

6:12

play and so I knew we had

6:14

a giant. Jamie Fox was not played

6:16

so we had a chance at winning.

6:18

We came out on five yeah, Jaylen

6:20

Brown in particular drainage race. Spread.

6:23

Moves garden don't prizes right but I'm

6:25

ah you know that the kids so

6:28

only get to watch that and I

6:30

know the Bruins one. Oh

6:33

by the way, I know the next one and

6:35

then fuck in New York Knicks. You gotta give

6:37

it up to Knicks fans. After

6:41

fuck in winning one game.

6:44

In the first round of the N B

6:46

A playoffs. Will

6:48

fuck with a plus sisters. Plane.

6:51

The Seventy Sixes, You know what they

6:53

chanted at the end of the game

6:55

outside the arena they would sharing We

6:57

want Boston. Told

7:02

you right now if I was putting out

7:04

a dictionary and I was in in the

7:06

word optimists came up and there was gonna

7:08

be a picture. Whatever they have it, they

7:11

gotta replace it. We. Gotta

7:13

get fucking Mother Teresa who have a word

7:15

people up thought was a good person there

7:17

they gotta replace it with in Nyc said.

7:20

They. Are we think this is the year

7:22

The always think they got the team they

7:25

always think that it's it's like fuckin. It's

7:28

seventeen thousand Charlie Brown's run in full

7:30

speed to kick the ball knowing full

7:32

well that them and is zigzagged fucking

7:34

sure to get you get and that

7:37

your back. Make

7:42

sense. You don't want Boston. You want the heat

7:44

to be Boston. That's what you want that's what

7:46

the fuck you meet our right I know you

7:48

had of fuck a good regular see I don't

7:50

know what's but I did get a kick out

7:52

of it that that's what the fuck they said

7:54

because my whole now my whole life but like

7:56

once E S P N and everybody really just

7:58

started stopping the fires arrival. I remember

8:00

when they, when the, the Yankees Red Sox thing was

8:03

huge, 1918 and all that shit,

8:05

curse of the babe. They

8:08

would, they, they just built

8:10

this stupid fucking story that

8:13

Boston had an inferiority complex

8:16

because they were so close to New York and they

8:18

weren't New York. Dude, I got to tell you something.

8:20

As someone who grew up there, we

8:23

didn't know shit about New York. Didn't

8:26

know shit. We knew there was the empire state building

8:28

in the Statue of Liberty. That was it. We

8:31

had no, nobody fucking knew anything.

8:33

We knew as much about New York as they

8:35

knew about Boston. You know them and like, Oh,

8:37

what are you, what are you from Boston? And

8:39

they do like a Midwest accent. No, not Boston,

8:41

Boston. You, you're

8:44

getting some chowder. I

8:48

lived in Boston for 27 years. I

8:51

heard everything under the sun other than,

8:53

Hey, do you want to

8:55

get some chowder? I never saw a

8:57

lighthouse. None of my friends were lobster

8:59

fishermen. The

9:04

big wave story from those fishermen up in

9:06

Gloucester. You know who knew that story? People

9:08

in Gloucester and fucking maybe in marble head

9:10

and a couple of weathermen. Nobody knew any

9:12

of that. Nobody knows. All right.

9:14

People they're focused on their own fucking

9:16

life. So

9:19

I got a kick out of the fact that they're paying

9:21

attention to Boston. And

9:24

I know good and goddamn well, New

9:27

Yorkers don't know shit about any

9:29

other fucking city. They

9:32

walk in and it's got less buildings. That's all

9:34

they know. And and

9:36

then the order of bacon, egg and cheese wherever

9:38

they are. And then they bitch because

9:40

they don't make it as good as they do on

9:42

the bodega two feet from where they live. They're

9:47

morons. They

9:50

just are. I'm not saying we're not

9:53

morons in Boston, but they're fucking morons.

9:58

Um, anyway. But

10:00

I root for the Knicks the same way I

10:02

root for the Toronto Maple Leafs unless they're playing

10:04

my Bruins Bruins that game I watched up until

10:06

the third period then I had to go out

10:09

and go do a spot I

10:11

left after Kalos fucking goal and

10:13

every time I walked out of the room They kept scoring

10:16

goals and I kept having to rewind So then I was

10:18

going like do I need to leave the room and it's

10:20

like no dude you let go of this You

10:23

let go of that stupid old

10:26

lady superstition slash Insistic

10:29

thought that that you who

10:32

can barely skate backwards in a pickup

10:34

game At 11

10:36

30 at night fucking ice time

10:38

somehow are affecting the outcome of

10:40

an NHL playoff So

10:43

anyway, yeah, we looked great from what I saw

10:45

and Just

10:47

shut down All of

10:50

those goal scorers that they have But

10:52

I gotta be honest with you like the

10:55

sand has to be running out of the

10:57

hourglass of the

10:59

Maple Leafs not winning a playoff series, I

11:01

mean They haven't won a

11:03

playoff series since 2004. That was 20 fucking

11:07

years ago I Mean

11:11

it's like it doesn't

11:13

even make it boggles the fucking mind that

11:15

that's even possible and Part

11:21

of the tradition of the Stanley

11:23

Cup playoffs Every

11:26

Year is not only them talking about

11:28

it's the hardest trophy to win the

11:30

fucking war. I mean To

11:33

Chuck last year could Chuck how I can never know how

11:35

to say that name The

11:39

guy had a broken sternum had

11:41

to have somebody dress him I think his brother

11:43

dressed him and he still played I mean they're

11:46

fucking warriors So

11:49

they always go through that whole thing like that great footage

11:54

they do at the end of March

11:56

Madness, you know the shining moment

11:58

that they play like they always go back and

12:00

they show all these bloody guys missing teeth and

12:02

all that shit, what they did to get this

12:04

fucking trophy, right? But part of

12:08

that highlight reel is

12:10

Toronto Maple Leafs sitting

12:12

outside their fucking

12:14

arena wildly

12:17

excited like it's finally going to happen

12:19

and then just the wheels fall off

12:21

and they slowly go away and then

12:23

there's just like 30% of them are

12:25

left. Like

12:28

I'll tell you the level of respect that I

12:30

have for hardcore New York Nick and

12:34

Toronto Maple Leafs fans

12:38

is 10 out of 10 because

12:43

for the most part, I mean the Knicks had some really

12:45

bad years, but for the most part they don't have the

12:47

decency to just suck. They have to get your hopes up

12:50

before they rip your heart out and it's like,

12:53

you know, even with the Jets, as

12:56

much as the Jets fans get excited and

12:58

they start giving out nicknames in August in

13:01

the preseason, they're the fucking king of that shit. You

13:04

know, fucking man genius, Sanchez,

13:07

who was the other one? We were going

13:09

through all of them. All

13:12

of the fucking Eddie Cutlets, all of

13:14

this fucking shit, right? They

13:17

did this Jimmy Cutlets, Vinny, whatever his fucking

13:19

name was, right? They do this every fucking

13:21

year, every fucking

13:23

year. They don't just, they can't just be like,

13:25

Hey, we're starting to turn shit around. They immediately

13:27

go, dude, we're going to the fucking Super Bowl.

13:35

I don't know. I

13:37

admire that. I admire

13:39

that and just watching it. It's like you're fucking

13:41

just looking, you know, you

13:44

just look in the other way because you know, you

13:46

know, the other, the other cleat or whatever, the other

13:48

skate, the other whatever it's going to drop and

13:51

the whole thing comes fucking crashing down.

13:53

So I don't

13:56

think this playoff series against the

13:58

Maple Leafs is. going to

14:00

be easy. I'm

14:03

beyond excited about

14:05

the season that the Bruins had.

14:07

And this was a major hangover

14:09

year, losing Patrice Bergeron and

14:12

David Craygee. And I thought we were going

14:14

to be middle of the pack and we

14:16

were upper third, which I was really happy

14:18

last I checked the standards. I'm really

14:20

ignorant all of this shit with my

14:23

life right now. But, you know,

14:27

if we win a playoff series, that's more than we did last

14:29

year. Ran into the buzzsaw

14:31

that was the Florida Panthers last year. Unfortunately,

14:34

they came up short. That was an amazing

14:36

story. But

14:40

whatever, Bruce Cassidy won one, you know, former Bruins coach.

14:42

I was happy for him with Vegas.

14:45

Anyway, that's when, see, that's

14:47

what my expectations are measured.

14:51

Nick's fans, Maple

14:53

Leaf fans, measure Maple Leaf fans. No,

14:56

Nick fans don't measure it. I'm

15:00

like, look, what we lost, you

15:02

can't replace those guys. The fucking

15:04

Hall of Famers like crazy getting

15:09

the Hall of Fame. I think it should be in the

15:11

whole thing. Bergeron definitely. I'm

15:15

looking coming out of that. If we just win

15:17

a playoff series, that's fucking amazing. So

15:20

anyway, I'll be watching game

15:22

two tonight and

15:26

had a fucking awesome weekend. Dean Del

15:28

Ray, the

15:30

Dean Del Razor took

15:32

me to the Hollywood Bowl

15:35

on Saturday night where

15:39

I saw the 60th birthday party from

15:41

Maynard tool and all of

15:43

those guys fucking showed up

15:46

and Primus

15:49

perfect circle and

15:51

a Pussifer, which I never

15:53

even heard of that band and

15:55

everybody comes out at the same time. It

15:59

was like three drum kits. on stage and they would

16:01

just take in turns. They would sing two, three songs and

16:03

then the next band would come down and then the rest

16:05

of the band would be up there hanging out and

16:08

doing shit, which I don't wanna ruin. For

16:11

when you go to the show, it was

16:13

fantastic. The level of humor in it was

16:15

fantastic. I don't wanna give away

16:17

any of this show. Maynard's fucking

16:19

hilarious. And

16:23

I ended up seeing a drummer that I

16:25

never heard of, Gunnar Olsen. Absolutely

16:28

fucking blew me away.

16:33

And then it was just everything. It just seemed like every

16:36

other song was like an odd

16:38

time. Certainly a perfect circle.

16:40

I think everything's in six. Josh Freese

16:42

was playing, Tim

16:44

Alexander for Primus. So I was

16:46

in my glory. And it's fantastic

16:49

as the show was. Like Maynard literally sounds like

16:51

the album from like 30 years ago. It's fucking

16:54

ridiculous. It's the only other time I saw that

16:57

I did a gig with Tony Bennett. I swear to God.

17:00

One of the most insane gigs I ever

17:02

did. It was Tony, John Stewart was hosting.

17:04

It was Tony Bennett, Bruce

17:07

Springsteen, Joe McHale, me

17:10

and I wanna say Jerry Seinfeld at

17:13

the Beacon Theater. And

17:16

Joe McHale had to follow fucking,

17:20

had to follow, he had

17:23

to follow those two fucking,

17:25

and Bruce Springsteen had

17:27

to follow Tony Bennett. And then he had to,

17:29

and Bruce Springsteen said, how am I gonna follow

17:31

this? And

17:33

he went out and fucking, you know, sliding around

17:35

on his knees, jumping up on the piano, just

17:38

fucking went all out. And then auctioned off his

17:40

fucking guitar to these rich people.

17:42

They paid like a hundred grand for it. And

17:44

then they're like, and now Joe McHale, like

17:46

he's got like the greatest, what

17:49

did you have to follow? And we were both

17:51

just laughing. I

17:53

mean, those two guys were killing so fucking hard.

17:55

I was just like, not only

17:57

is Joe gonna struggle, so am I. And

18:00

that's, you know, that's kind of what happened. And then

18:02

Jerry came out and he's Jerry and he fucking destroyed.

18:05

Um, but we

18:07

both definitely, uh, took one for the team

18:09

that night anyway. So

18:13

as amazing as the show was, um,

18:17

there was this group of people in front of us. We had

18:19

like box seats at the Hollywood bull. If you've never been there,

18:22

you got to see a show there. So each

18:24

box has like four seats, right? So in the

18:26

box in front of us, there's four seats and

18:28

somehow there was anywhere from six to eight people

18:30

in it at a time. It

18:33

was like the old days when you would sneak into a

18:35

drive-in movie theater, which I never did. I just used to

18:37

watch footage of it, right? And they would sneak like five

18:39

people in the trunk. So you only had to pay for

18:41

like two people and you'd open it up and everybody come

18:43

running out. Uh, it was basically

18:45

that version of it. Box seats

18:48

and these people, I don't know, they're probably 10

18:50

to 15 years younger than me, they were fucking

18:53

tailgating. Drinking

18:56

tall beers and smoking joints. I'm talking

18:58

the final song and they announced this

19:00

is the final song and they lit

19:02

a new joint. Like I was looking

19:04

at, like, I was looking at

19:06

Dean. Like at first we were like, aren't these guys a little old

19:08

to be fucking drinking like this? And

19:11

then it just became funny and

19:13

they were dancing in the fucking aisles. And

19:15

my favorite part of doing these weird fucking dances and

19:17

they're making videos as they were running at each other.

19:19

Like it was some, you know, with the lights like,

19:22

dude, this is going to be killer shit. And

19:24

I was laughing with Dean. I was going tomorrow when they

19:26

sober up, they're going to see what we're seeing right now.

19:31

But right now what they're doing is

19:34

changing the fucking universe. So that was

19:36

as fun as watching, um, as

19:40

watching the bands. And,

19:43

uh, I mean, I got to see, you

19:45

know, three of the best drummers out there

19:47

and all in one night and like, it

19:51

was like flipping channels. They kept switching.

19:54

It was incredible. And then in the end, uh,

19:57

Danny Carey came out the whole. I'd

20:01

never seen them live. They played one fucking

20:03

song and I was just like, wow, like

20:05

what is this? This

20:08

is incredible. Like this, the Sonic, I

20:12

don't know what you call it, just a salt. A salt's

20:14

bad, because that makes it sound like it was a bad

20:17

thing. Just, they were unfucking believable. And then

20:19

everybody in the end came out and all

20:21

jammed together. It was an

20:24

incredible night. And I kind of turned around at one

20:26

point just to see what the crowd's gonna look like.

20:29

I got a gig there in a few weeks and at less than

20:31

a few weeks. So I kind of had to

20:33

look at it and be like, all right. Okay, you

20:35

know, just fucking one

20:38

joke at time. Block

20:44

it out. Anyway, just act like it's not

20:46

happening. And then when it does, just go out and do what

20:48

you do and then think about it after. Anyway,

20:52

I had

20:54

a great fucking time doing that. And

20:57

then today a buddy of mine came

20:59

over and he's got one of those French cars, the

21:01

Citroen. Citroen.

21:06

Six cylinder, the engine's put in

21:08

backwards. It's fucking

21:10

incredible. The car was amazing. First of all,

21:12

it had a six cylinder, it was light

21:14

as shit. So it like sort of low

21:17

key, hall-de-ass, five speed, classic French car. You

21:19

know you were in a French car when

21:21

the ashtray is closer than the radio. That's

21:23

how they do it. And

21:26

this car, when you started it up, you had to sit there. Because

21:29

it had like this air suspension system.

21:32

And you had to let the car run and warm up

21:34

or whatever. And all of a sudden the front end of

21:36

the car lifts up three inches and then

21:38

the back end of the car lifts up three inches. So

21:42

we're driving, and that's probably, you know, and a

21:44

Frenchman at that point is, you know, halfway

21:47

through his first cigarette, you know, back in the day

21:49

when they made those cars, it was from the 70s,

21:51

right? And remember they

21:53

were illegal over here. When I was a kid

21:55

I had a corgi car toy version of it.

22:00

Oh no, I think I'm thinking of a different car. There

22:04

was one other car that they had that almost

22:06

looked like the VW thing, except it was a

22:08

longer version of it. And that

22:10

car was not deemed safe enough. I

22:13

mean, the walls on this thing were like, they were

22:15

like an eighth of an inch thick. It

22:18

was like a tree fork, except it was made out of metal.

22:21

And then they put wheels underneath it. And then

22:23

it had like this rag top that you could just sort

22:25

of like roll

22:27

up like a yoga mat on top of it.

22:29

I mean, the amount of decapitations, you

22:32

know, the amount of berets laying

22:34

in the streets when people drove those things must've been

22:36

off the fucking, um, on

22:39

little, um, anyway, I,

22:46

uh, rode around on that thing.

22:48

So we're going down the street and there's these speed

22:50

bumps coming up and he goes, dude, watch

22:52

this. And he fucking floors it. And I

22:54

literally went, you know, cause the car

22:57

hasn't been restored. I'm like, this whole fucking thing, the whole front

22:59

end of this car is going to like bottom out and it's

23:01

going to be all over the road. Dude, we went over him.

23:03

You didn't even feel him. It was just

23:05

like, and

23:08

I was like, dude, that's gotta do something to

23:10

the tires. There's something's taken the impact of that.

23:13

We're not moving, but something is. He's like, no, man, this is

23:15

how they built these fucking things. It was like, I never been

23:17

in one of those. You ever see

23:19

watch those Baja races with those insane fucking pickup

23:21

trucks or maybe like the guy, I know like

23:24

the Ford Raptor. Um,

23:27

which I really feel is sort of the

23:29

Mercedes G wagon of Ford

23:31

trucks. There's like a certain personality that buys it.

23:34

It's not really a truck. I

23:38

mean, it is, but it's not really a truck. It's

23:42

kind of, uh, you

23:44

know, it's, it's one of those cars. Hey,

23:46

look at me. I'm doing big things

23:49

over. It's one of those fucking cars.

23:53

Uh, do you hear about Mike? You got a fucking,

23:55

uh, why is everybody Mike on the podcast here about

23:57

Jerry? Do Jerry got a fucking

23:59

rap? You don't give a fuck,

24:01

you just got to raise. Fucking

24:04

loving life, this fucking wife's hot, you know?

24:07

Must be nice, right? Must be nice.

24:12

That was the, that was

24:14

Boston hating when I was growing up. Must

24:16

be nice. Like

24:19

people would say that if your life was going well. They

24:21

would start listing all the things that was going well in your

24:23

life and then they'd be like, must be nice. Look

24:27

at you, huh? Is

24:29

that you? That's you out there, new car?

24:31

Really? What'd you pay for

24:34

it? Not bad. Cloth

24:36

interior, you got AC, AC, wow. Must

24:39

be nice. Like

24:42

I'm supposed to feel fucking bad for you. It's like

24:44

dude, it's three in the afternoon on Tuesday, you're fucking

24:46

drinking here. Why don't you think you have that car?

24:49

I'm here picking up pizzas. Moving

24:53

on the sauce since

24:55

the place fucking opened. Come

24:59

walking in, you flip the Herald over to

25:01

the backside. Fucking

25:03

red sauce lost again, dude. All right,

25:05

been drinking ever since. What

25:09

am I talking about? I don't know.

25:15

I'm very excited this weekend. I'm going to Phoenix,

25:17

Arizona for not one. Not

25:20

two. Not three, but

25:23

four. I'm hitting for the cycle out

25:25

there. We just put Sunday

25:27

show on sale in like the past

25:29

week. So all

25:32

shows, what, Thursday,

25:34

Friday, Saturday are like

25:37

95% gone and then there's

25:39

some tickets left on Sunday. So

25:42

before I go any further, thank you

25:44

to everybody in Phoenix, ridiculously coming out

25:46

to support me. I

25:52

think you're going to, my

25:54

act is about ready to do a special. So

25:57

I'm going to be coming in at the top of my game.

26:00

And I am not fucking around because I

26:02

got the special coming up of the Hollywood Bowl.

26:04

So I need to be Oh

26:08

Billy Billy fucking focused on

26:11

these goddamn things. All right, let's do some

26:13

reads here for the week. Let's do some

26:15

reads Okay,

26:18

look the Tim Ferriss show this

26:20

episode is brought to you by the Tim

26:22

Ferriss show Podcast I

26:25

like this. This is like Sesame Street the

26:27

Tim Ferriss show crossed

26:29

one billion downloads what

26:33

in Can

26:36

you imagine if a billion people like actually

26:38

listen to it like one person? Like

26:42

one billion people all listen to one episode. That

26:44

would be What percentage

26:46

of the whole planet? What

26:48

I'm trying to say is this guy is on his

26:50

way to having as much downloads as there are People

26:53

on the plane was eight billion people. He's one

26:55

billion down seven to go Cross

26:59

one billion downloads in 2023

27:02

and it's celebrating its 10-year anniversary this

27:04

month. So this guy does like a

27:06

hundred million downloads a year They have

27:08

some very exciting plans for 2024 each

27:11

episode Tim

27:13

Ferriss deconstructs world-class performers from

27:16

eclectic worlds business arts sports

27:18

Japanese knife making sex

27:20

work and Everything in

27:22

between Jesus corona. What do you got

27:25

a billion downloads talking to the who

27:27

is? To extract

27:29

the techniques tricks tools and routines you

27:31

can use. Oh to be a better

27:33

fucking prostitute Many notable

27:36

guests had their first ever interviews on

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the Tim Ferriss show Including

27:41

Arnold Schwarzenegger Jamie Fox from

27:43

the Miami Heat Jaco

27:46

willing Rick Rubin the founder of

27:48

Cirque du Soleil iconic

27:51

filmmaker Darren Aronofsky reclusive

27:54

prodigy Aren't

27:56

all prodigies reclusive talking to themselves and then

27:59

they make a movie about it and

28:01

then my left foot guy plays him and he gets

28:04

an Oscar. Josh Waitskin,

28:08

Tony Robbins and many many more. Past

28:11

guests have include Jerry

28:13

Seinfeld, LeBron James, Edward

28:15

Norton, Malcolm Galbwel,

28:17

Matthew McConaughey and hundreds of

28:19

others. You know

28:22

I also did the show. If you think if you're

28:24

gonna advertise, if I'm gonna advertise another fucking podcast on

28:26

my podcast, you can think you could at least give

28:28

me a shout out Tim. So

28:30

who is Tim Ferriss? Woo, inquiring minds

28:32

want to know. Tim Ferriss has been

28:34

listed on as one of

28:36

the fast, as one of fast companies,

28:39

most innovative business people and

28:43

Newsweek has also called him the

28:45

world's best guinea pig. I

28:48

don't know what that means. He's the author of

28:51

the number one New York Times and Wall

28:53

Street Journal bestsellers, bringing the four hour work

28:55

week and tools of titans, the tactics routines

28:57

have. When did this guy take a break?

29:01

Habits of billionaires? Oh,

29:03

I would love to hear that. Oh

29:07

yeah, yeah, they get out the morning and I

29:09

make my bed. Yeah, they're in press third world

29:12

countries. Icons and world

29:14

class performers. You can find the Tim Ferriss

29:16

show wherever you get your podcast. You can

29:18

learn more about the podcast

29:20

as well as a five bulletin

29:23

Friday, Tim's newsletter with

29:25

2 million weekly subscribers at

29:27

Tim.blog. That's

29:30

Tim.blog. All right,

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simply safe. Alright, let's get

31:26

to the reads here for the week. I'm

31:31

not gonna lie to you. I just hit pause. Went

31:34

to bed. Now it's Monday morning. Now I'm fucking

31:36

late. I don't got time for this shit! And

31:41

I watched the Celtics game in

31:43

the third quarter. I'm assuming they won. Bill,

31:46

how do you not know they won? You know

31:48

what? I don't know because somehow nobody's texting me.

31:50

It's fucking amazing. Okay.

31:54

Bill, great emails. Alright. Update.

31:56

Government asking for face scan,

31:59

man. Tell you it's

32:01

never gonna stop This is what

32:03

kills me. This is what they're gonna

32:05

do right and all these fucking gun

32:07

owners out there who always go I

32:09

have my gun collection in case a

32:11

tyrannical government tyrannies on my tyrannical tearing

32:13

is what the fuck are you guys

32:15

waiting for? What

32:19

are you waiting for are you gonna get organized

32:22

January 6th, is that the best you got?

32:25

We have helmets and

32:27

fucking ropes Here

32:35

they go here they go they're going for

32:37

more they're going for more whatever the government

32:39

wants eventually a corporation wants Okay.

32:42

Hey, Bill. I just thought I'd write

32:44

in to let you know I listen

32:46

to your advice and stood my ground

32:48

against getting my facial recognition set up

32:51

for the new Laptops that were being

32:53

rolled out for my job. No way

32:55

the IT team were unsure whether you

32:57

could turn off the facial Recognition from

32:59

the onset so there's no initial scan

33:01

needed Which gives me

33:03

the idea that a lot of people have just just went

33:05

along with it instead of questioning it

33:08

Which is just sad if that's the case

33:10

long story short I didn't have to leave

33:12

my job and I was able to avoid

33:14

the scan altogether. Yeah, because there's no law

33:18

They're just doing this there's no law that

33:20

says you have to do it now enough

33:22

people push back then eventually there will be

33:24

a Love we really have no fucking say

33:27

it's not a democracy People

33:30

have become so willing to sacrifice certain

33:33

privileges privileges in exchange for Comfortability

33:36

so I'm glad I didn't compromise as

33:38

it all worked out Well in the

33:40

end your advice was a big help

33:42

with this and I really appreciate it

33:45

much love to you And

33:47

the family and go fuck yourself. That's

33:50

good See, that's the kind

33:52

of standing your ground that we need Not

33:56

this racist stand your ground,

33:58

you know, I felt threatened and you just

34:01

use the laws so you can go out and kill

34:03

somebody who isn't white. Why don't

34:05

we all fucking get together and

34:07

fucking push back against this stuff? Huh,

34:10

man? Sorry, I just woke up.

34:12

I'm feeling righteous. I

34:15

have my gun collection in case the government becomes

34:18

too tyrannical. And

34:20

what are you going to do with it? Just

34:27

whatever. Keep your

34:29

nose clean. I'm

34:31

waiting to rebel when they come up my

34:33

driveway. Keep your nose clean.

34:36

Hey, Bill. Hey, Billy, no news. This

34:38

week the Senate passed on ex- oh my God, why

34:40

are you guys doing this to me in the morning?

34:43

This week the Senate passed on expansion

34:45

to the spying powers and

34:48

overriding of the Fourth Amendment to

34:50

the Constitution. Here's a quote about

34:53

the provisions. I don't even know what the Fourth Amendment

34:55

is. All I ever hear about is the first and

34:57

the second. The

34:59

provision effectively grants the NSA

35:01

access to the communications equipment of

35:04

almost any US business plus

35:06

huge numbers of organizations and

35:09

individuals. It's a gift

35:11

to any president who may wish

35:13

to spy on political enemies, journalists,

35:15

ideological opponents. Yeah, see, this is

35:17

how they're going to bypass your

35:19

gun collection. The

35:21

administration, by the time you guys fucking get

35:23

together and try and stop these fucking corporations,

35:26

they're going to know what you're doing as

35:28

you're planning it. The

35:30

administration and intelligent committee leaders buried

35:32

senators in a morass

35:36

of misleading and in some cases-

35:40

what is M-O-R-A-S-S? It

35:42

has ass in it. More ass of

35:44

misleading and in some cases flatly false

35:46

statements throughout the week. I think of

35:48

myself as a pretty jaded and

35:50

I was still generally shaken by how

35:52

many lies I heard, one of the

35:55

most dramatic and terrifying expansions of the

35:57

government's surveillance authority in history. keeping

36:00

score, we're funding three wars, stripping ourselves

36:02

of basic human rights and allowing our

36:04

land to be bought by foreign governments

36:06

with money they created out of thin

36:08

air too. I stopped

36:11

paying attention to the news 10 years

36:13

ago, but have a kid, have had

36:15

a kid since and let's just say I'm

36:17

also idling in third year all day thinking

36:19

about how insane things are getting. I

36:21

used to think it can't get much worse in our

36:23

lives, in our lives and it

36:26

wouldn't change, but between all

36:28

these things and AI it's going to

36:30

be a completely different century.

36:34

I'm not a nostalgic guy, so this isn't, I

36:36

wish I was a kid again thinking like when

36:38

people think it was better because they were home

36:40

watching cartoons all day not worrying about Iran Contra

36:42

or whatever was going on. That's a great point.

36:44

A lot of times, oh my god, the 90s

36:46

were the greatest decade. It's like, yeah, because you

36:49

were in your teens or your 20s. You

36:54

didn't have the pressures of life. There was still much

36:56

a horrible shit going any decades you find. Anyway,

36:59

the person says, by the way, for all the people that

37:02

give you shit calling you both

37:04

sides bill and sufferable

37:06

centrist, do

37:09

they say that? Both

37:12

sides bill and sufferable centrist. See, well,

37:14

that's what they do. They name call

37:16

because they can't refute the points that

37:19

I'm making. They can't

37:21

refute the point that whatever political party they lean

37:23

on is just as fucking corrupt as the one

37:25

that they think is causing all the fucking problems.

37:28

It's irrefutable. You

37:31

can't fuck, they fucking work for the

37:33

same people. You

37:36

know what I do love? The name calling, like

37:38

whenever somebody makes a good point in one

37:43

of those threads on like Instagram, the

37:45

other person would be like, oh, these

37:48

lip tards are getting awfully sensitive. Looks

37:51

like I pushed some buttons on some

37:53

Trumpers. And it's like, no,

37:56

it looks like the Trump person or the

37:58

fucking liberal made a point that you can.

38:00

can't refute so now you're just going to

38:02

be like, oh, you're getting all sensitive now.

38:06

Fucking morons. And I, let me be honest with

38:08

you, when I go on an Instagram thread or

38:10

when I just kind of listen to some of these

38:12

people at these fucking moron rallies, you're like, well, no

38:15

wonder they want to take this level of control. Look

38:17

at the level of fucking stupidity out there. Look

38:20

at Bill. Now I'm on the side of those. I'm not on

38:22

those side. Like I said, I draw a hard line on that.

38:24

Fuck these people. All right. Plowing

38:26

your head. In the current section, every

38:28

time you talk about RFK, please remember

38:30

that this one with

38:33

an equal amount of votes from

38:35

both color ties, love

38:37

you and love the podcast. Yeah, exactly. They fucking

38:39

paid them off. What is people's problems with the

38:41

RFK? I don't understand it, but like, you know

38:44

what I love about it is all they do is attack him.

38:47

They won't talk about, I mean, let's, and I always

38:49

say, let's just say RFK is the worst fucking person

38:51

in the world. My question is

38:53

why isn't any

38:55

conservative Republican candidate or

38:57

liberal fucking Democrat candidate

39:00

talking about how one corporation is buying

39:02

up all the houses. One

39:04

corporation has bought up the empire, all

39:08

the pigs and all of that shit and sold it to

39:10

a company in China. They're doing shit like that all the

39:13

fucking time. Why aren't any of them talking about that stuff?

39:17

None of that has to do with antisemitism or

39:19

any of that. All of those fucking points that

39:21

he's making. Why aren't any of them talking about

39:23

that? Cause they're all fucking bought

39:25

and paid for you dumb cunts. Oh, I'm

39:27

on my fucking freckled stump. Corporate

39:31

jargon and phrases. Yeah,

39:35

what's happening to RFK is what happens anytime

39:37

you go after the people that are actually

39:39

behind the politicians. Do they immediately brand you

39:42

like a fucking socialist, a communist and antisemite?

39:44

They just tar and feather you and

39:46

say that you're crazy and that you're a waste of a vote.

39:49

Vote for Hillary or Biden or Trump. This

39:52

is the good fucking move. Okay.

39:55

Corporate jargon and phrases. Beverly

39:58

Hills Bill. You

40:00

know, I recently heard you talking about

40:02

corporate jargon and other nonsensical terminologies that

40:04

at the end of the day add

40:06

nothing to a value. Yeah, my favorite

40:08

one that you guys sent in was

40:10

BioBreak. I'm going to go take a

40:13

BioBreak. That means I'm going to go fucking hit the head, take

40:15

a dump, shake

40:19

my fucking whatever, whatever

40:22

you call your dick. I

40:25

blame the management consulting companies

40:27

like Delawite,

40:31

EY, and KPMG for the

40:33

rise of this. However,

40:35

the original source is investment and

40:37

corporate banking, your Wall Street pals.

40:40

They're commonly referred to as bankerisms.

40:43

Well, what are they going to say, what they're

40:45

doing? I

40:51

walked by yesterday on the sidewalk. I literally saw

40:53

a person in a tent with

40:56

giant brown boxes on the outside

40:58

all taped together, freshly

41:00

fucking homeless. It was fucking heartbreaking

41:03

with all of this stuff. And then you're homeless

41:05

for 10 days and you look like you've been out

41:07

there for fucking 10 years and everybody just thinks you're

41:10

a crazy homeless person. And

41:12

all of these fucking corporation guys get

41:14

bonuses. They get bonuses by making people

41:16

unemployed and possibly homeless. They

41:19

get six figures, seven figure bonuses at the

41:21

end of the day for putting people out

41:23

on the fucking street. Is

41:25

that centrist? Here

41:29

are a few examples I thought you'd like. Boil

41:34

the ocean. Don't

41:36

need to work hard for an easy result. Low

41:41

hanging fruit, something too easy, obvious.

41:44

We use that in my business. That's

41:46

when you have a hacky joke. Are you going

41:48

after something that everybody's making fun of? Smell

41:52

test, intuitive understanding or

41:54

experience. Talking

41:58

slick to a barrel of oil. That's

42:01

trying to BS. Cutting

42:04

along with scissors, overworking an

42:06

easy project, squeaky

42:08

wheel gets the grease. I mean, that's

42:10

a common phrase right there. Three

42:13

men make a tiger. If

42:16

enough people believe in something, it can be, it

42:19

can be true. Oh

42:25

my God, what the fuck is wrong with

42:27

these people? Three

42:30

men make a tiger. If enough people believe

42:32

something, it can be true. Jesus

42:36

fucking Christ. Can

42:38

you imagine like wasting your life

42:40

doing that, learning how

42:42

to like manipulate people just so you can

42:44

have more money and stuff and

42:47

then walk around with some Botox, fake titted,

42:49

the whore. I don't

42:53

know. I don't, I don't understand that

42:55

they're fucking crazy people. These phrases are

42:58

commonly used during corporate earning, earning calls,

43:01

boardroom presentations or general projects at

43:03

investment shops. Do you want something?

43:05

I bet the, all of these

43:07

people have some

43:09

insane hobby. You got

43:12

to have something to walk away from that. But even these

43:14

people know what the fuck they're doing. Some

43:16

sort of collection. If

43:19

you want something funny to watch, I check out

43:24

Lauren Prince, gone

43:27

calves, Cleveland cliff

43:29

CEO earning calls when he

43:31

berates wall street analysis analysts.

43:34

Sorry. Maybe

43:37

someday your caller will be as

43:39

white as your skin. A long

43:41

time podcast listener. I

43:46

am actually not blue collar or white collar. I grew

43:48

up in a blue collar town, but my parents were

43:50

white collar, but we had a

43:53

little financial difficulty there. So

43:57

that's why I have, you know. I

44:00

don't know. Maybe that's why I'm all over the place with

44:03

you fucking cunts. All

44:05

right, Corporate Lingo. What up,

44:07

Billy Bandwith? Corporate Banker Cunt here. I

44:11

built foreclosure prevention programs.

44:14

A couple of words here from the

44:16

financial industry. Opportunity.

44:18

A problem.

44:25

Oh, that means opportunity means there's a

44:27

problem? Okay, deliverables. Did I

44:29

not eat breakfast today? My stomach is growling

44:31

like a fucking son of a bitch. I

44:33

had my pafe deliverable.

44:37

Document report or something which needs

44:39

to be created or changed to

44:41

solve the opportunity. Oh,

44:45

God, this is fucked. I look at it. They have

44:47

to talk around all of this shit because

44:49

otherwise they'll be in the board room

44:52

going like, all right, this is bullshit. But

44:54

enough of if enough of us say it's

44:56

true, these people will think that it's true

44:58

and then we can rob them. Well,

45:02

you know, three men make a tiger. And

45:05

I think we can solve this opportunity.

45:09

Dude, they call a problem an opportunity.

45:11

Oh, my God, these fucking people. They

45:13

need to be, they just need to

45:15

be fucking, they need

45:17

to be put down. That's what

45:19

needs to happen. All right. Working session.

45:21

A side meeting to work on the

45:24

deliverable. Issue slash defect. We

45:26

fucked up the deliverable and

45:28

created a new opportunity. What

45:33

the fuck? My head is spinning. Hope all

45:35

is well. I thought that was another saying.

45:38

Meaning I'm going to try to fucking kill you

45:40

by cutting your break lines. Hope all is well.

45:42

Looking forward to seeing you in Winston Salem soon.

45:44

Whoa, let's go back. Opportunity

45:47

deliverable working

45:49

session. That

45:52

means you're going to work the weekend. A side

45:54

meeting to work on the deliverable, which

45:57

is a report to fix

45:59

the fucking opportunity, but

46:03

if you fuck up the deliverable, you have

46:05

an issue or a defect and created a

46:07

new opportunity. What

46:11

is that? When people realize you poured something into

46:13

the fucking water supply? All

46:16

right, that was more chilling than funny. All

46:18

right, office talk. Oh,

46:20

I think we got ourselves a hit topic here.

46:22

Office talk. Hey,

46:27

Billy Cunter. I

46:29

like that one. Jesus Christ. Hey,

46:31

Billy Cunter. I'm an electrician

46:34

in the great province of Alberta. Oh,

46:38

you guys are fucking animals up there.

46:40

Now those people can drink specifically

46:43

Calgary. I used to think Calgary was

46:45

blue collar and Edmonton was white collar

46:47

and somebody goes, no, it's the other

46:49

way around. Edmonton's, they're more

46:52

of a bunch of animals than Calgary,

46:54

which surprises me because the first time

46:56

I played Calgary, I was absolutely fucking

46:59

astounded at the level of drinking that

47:01

was going on. They

47:03

were fucking hammered. I remember it was a concrete

47:05

floor and every like fucking 10

47:08

minutes you just hear a beer, a beer

47:10

bottle, hit the floor and start rolling towards

47:12

the front of the crowd and everyone would

47:14

just start laughing. All

47:17

right. Okay, great

47:19

province of Alberta. After listening to your

47:21

previous podcast, I thought I might add

47:23

to the office slang, but in a

47:26

blue collar perspective, I

47:28

love it. All right. Cunt hair, unit

47:31

of measurement, usually about an eighth of an

47:33

inch. I

47:35

use cunt hair for the flake gate.

47:37

That's why you lost by 35. That's

47:39

why you let up over 300 yards

47:42

rushing. Okay. All

47:44

right, bang on. Albert Ohtani. Oh, it

47:46

was my interpreter. Nothing to see here.

47:50

Houston Astros, their first

47:52

World Series was complicated.

47:56

Bang on. Perfect fitment

47:58

or measurement. Playing

48:00

guilty, showing up to work,

48:02

hungover. Oh, that's fantastic. See,

48:05

these are just fun. Looks

48:09

good from my house. Never a

48:11

good thing to hear, but if you stand

48:13

back far enough, it looks pretty okay. That's

48:18

fantastic. Oh

48:21

my God. I remember I told you a long time

48:24

ago. I was

48:26

hanging with Patrice in front of Caroline's and

48:28

this woman was crossing the street. I said, oh my

48:31

God, look at her. She's a 10 and she got

48:33

a little car. Some Patrice went nine and then I

48:35

was like eight and then we just started laughing and

48:37

we were saying she has like came

48:40

up with she has rocket launch. Good

48:42

looks. I mean, that's when a

48:44

woman is look like from a distance looks

48:46

like a 10, but as she walks that

48:48

girl's a 10 and then she comes towards

48:50

you. It's nine eight, but you still get

48:53

a number. All right.

48:55

The infamous one-day flu aka

48:57

the Philly flu. Some

48:59

guys on the job site are notorious for having

49:01

a one-day flu when they know it's going to

49:03

be a hard day. Or

49:06

they do it on a Friday to get a three-day

49:08

weekend. The Philly flu in hockey was

49:12

you asked out of the lineup because of some

49:14

phantom injury because you didn't want to drop the

49:16

gloves against the Broad Street bullies back in the

49:19

day. Don't

49:21

forget your knee pads. I'm

49:24

some kissing ass. They usually said when

49:26

someone mentions going to talk to the

49:28

boss. Okay. Oh,

49:30

that's it. It looks good from my

49:32

house. Playing guilty is fantastic. There's

49:35

a few to keep the ball

49:37

rolling. I also there's a

49:39

few to keep the ball rolling. I also

49:41

think you mentioned working a trade or two

49:44

in your older podcast. So hopefully you can

49:46

appreciate some of these gems. Thanks

49:50

for all the entertainment during my morning drives.

49:52

Go fuck yourself and let's go Oilers. Bang

49:58

on. I thought I always thought that was ink. English, cunt

50:00

hair, playing guilty, that

50:02

one's fantastic. I'm trying to think what the fuck we used

50:05

to, all we

50:07

used to do was just try to make each other laugh. That's

50:12

all I remember. We could

50:14

do impressions of everybody in the carpeted

50:16

area and we would just create scenarios.

50:22

Yeah, that's all I remember. I don't remember like

50:24

any expressions. We

50:27

had nicknames and stuff like that too. We're going

50:29

back and this is like the fucking 80s. It's

50:32

almost 40 years ago. Jesus Christ, almost.

50:35

All right, wife, speak and corporate

50:37

talk. Dear Billy the

50:39

barista. I've enjoyed

50:41

the show for years and wanted

50:43

to pass along more corporate speak

50:45

and a typical text communication between

50:47

my wife and I. 40

50:50

years married. The confusion never

50:52

fails. The background is that

50:54

I'm napping, parentheses have a cold

50:56

and she knows this, when she

50:58

leaves the house to go for a

51:00

walk. It poured earlier and it's been

51:02

cloudy all day. I woke up and

51:05

see this text, 3 p.m., text from

51:07

wife. You up? 3

51:09

10, my response, just now, why? I

51:13

come downstairs to find she's gone

51:16

and see it's pouring out. I see the

51:19

sticky notes saying she is out

51:21

walking. So I respond, I'm

51:24

in your car coming to look for you. I

51:26

then open the garage door and she's walking

51:28

up the driveway like a drowned rat. I'm

51:32

getting the look. She's

51:34

PO'd at my slow response.

51:37

I was supposed to translate you up to

51:41

mean come get me. I'm on Smith

51:43

Street and it's pouring. Anywho,

51:46

I'm always quoting Dr. Seuss

51:48

Horton, the elephant at

51:50

her, say what you

51:52

mean and mean what you say just to get

51:54

her going. Yeah,

51:58

I don't understand any of that. I would, you

52:00

know what, I would just, my

52:04

lovely wife came walking up to driveway like that,

52:06

I would just laugh and

52:08

be like, oh, you can't just grab a

52:10

blanket or a towel or something. That's

52:17

hilarious. You up 310 just now. Why? No response. Oh,

52:24

what a fucking baby. Yeah, you know,

52:28

what are you going to do? It's just how

52:30

they are. I

52:32

fucking texted you at three. Hey,

52:37

you should have looked at the

52:39

forecast on your smartphone there, sweetheart.

52:42

What? Anyway,

52:47

all right. Game two is tonight. The

52:49

Boston Bruins. All

52:56

the old heads know that one from the 1950s, 50 fucking years ago.

52:58

We'll see. If

53:03

we go up two games to none, I

53:07

still don't think I'm comfortable. We'd

53:09

have to be up 3-0. Um,

53:14

I just, I just can't see them doing this again

53:17

this year. I just, I cannot fucking see it. And

53:19

the people in Toronto, oh, stop jinxing us. I'm not

53:21

jinxing you. It's been almost 60 fucking

53:23

years, 60 fucking

53:25

years. You know what I love is no one

53:27

says Toronto was cursed. Right?

53:31

Everybody said that, not everybody, that fucking

53:33

hockey fans said that the New York

53:36

Rangers were cursed. They went 54 years

53:40

and they were chanting 1940 Adam. Starting

53:44

in the eighties is how far back I

53:46

remember them doing that. It's amazing how like,

53:48

you know, just certain franchises get shit and

53:50

other ones don't. So 54

53:53

years ago is 1970. Toronto

53:56

hasn't won it since 1967. They're

54:02

57 years in. They've gone three years

54:04

longer than the Rangers who had to end a

54:06

curse and no one is saying that they're cursed.

54:10

And you know why that is? Because Toronto

54:12

is the fucking media capital of

54:15

Canada and they're suppressing the story.

54:18

And everybody forgets because you're so busy paying attention

54:20

to your own team. I

54:24

will tell you what's amazing is that

54:26

somehow with the Toronto Maple Leafs not

54:28

winning a cup for

54:32

like 50, what

54:34

I just say, 57 years,

54:38

Montreal Canadian fans have still

54:40

somehow maintained their

54:42

irrational hatred for the Toronto Maple Leafs.

54:44

It doesn't even make any sense. They

54:46

haven't done anything. They've

54:50

done nothing. They

54:55

haven't won since two years before we pretended

54:57

to land on the moon. No,

55:00

I'm not one of those guys. I'm

55:02

one of those guys that has no idea whether we did or not.

55:05

I'm not one of those people that goes on the internet and figures

55:07

shit out. Like I saw this guy on Instagram. I'm going to fucking

55:10

sneeze here people. I'm going to stare at the night. Thank

55:17

you. I

55:20

was on Instagram because I'm doing that again. And

55:25

this fucking guy goes on there said he

55:27

spent 1500 hours on the internet and he

55:29

figured out that Bitcoin. Bitcoin

55:35

was this giant scam to

55:38

crash the entire

55:40

world's economy so

55:42

that a very few amount of people could get

55:44

all the money and the rest of us would

55:46

be completely destitute. And

55:50

I'm just thinking like, all right,

55:52

that information is out there. Hey,

55:56

I have a great idea. How about me and

55:58

five of my friends? tank the

56:00

world's economy. Everybody's

56:03

fighting and eating each other cannibalism

56:05

and all of that shit, right?

56:07

Dying off and we're going to keep all

56:09

the money. That's what we're

56:11

going to do. Okay, all right, great. Now

56:14

let's, let's upload this information on the internet.

56:17

So if somebody spends 1500 hours, they

56:19

can find if I spent 1500 on

56:22

the hours on the internet, like I

56:25

spent 1500 hours on the, everybody spent

56:27

1500 hours on the internet. Like

56:30

what part of the, are you on the truthful

56:32

internet? That's

56:35

how fuck that's, that's the level of misinformation

56:37

that's out there right now. I'm not saying

56:40

that there isn't some sort of scam going

56:42

on. I'm just saying that you as a

56:44

lay person cannot even remotely figure out what

56:46

the fuck is going on. I love how

56:48

they have all these top secret documents in

56:50

these government buildings, but somehow if you go

56:52

on the internet, you can figure out what

56:55

the fuck they're doing. All you're doing is

56:57

you're, you're listening to theories by

57:00

people who are in different mindsets.

57:02

Some people, former employees of

57:04

the government, that's a pretty good source, but

57:07

who knows maybe they're bad shit crazy.

57:11

And here's my thing. If

57:14

you're going to fucking do that, come

57:17

up with the solution first rather than just

57:19

telling me this shit, freaking me the fuck

57:21

out and then being like, all right, have

57:23

a good day. The worst

57:27

one I saw was this guy and he was doing it

57:30

in a sing songy voice. He's

57:32

like, your recyclables are

57:34

not recycled. They're

57:36

dumped in the ocean and it's going

57:39

into the fish and you're all full

57:41

of plastic. You're welcome. It's like,

57:44

well, you're living on the same planet. And

57:46

also none of that is new information. He

57:49

took all this old shit and then he

57:51

just fucking repurposed it. Like he just figured

57:53

it all out. Like he was out there

57:56

doing that shit with those little things that you stick in

57:58

the water, those little tubes. And then you shake them and

58:00

you look at the color. And

58:03

that's turning red. This isn't good. The

58:06

plastic content of this section of the ocean,

58:08

you don't know what the fuck you're talking

58:11

about either. All right. This is

58:13

just getting me going. All

58:16

right. I've done a lot of good

58:18

things in March and I undid them in April and I'm

58:20

going to turn it around in May. That's how it's going.

58:24

So anyway, that is the podcast

58:26

everybody. Game

58:29

two, Boston Bruins tonight, tonight,

58:31

tonight. Obviously

58:34

pulling for the Bruins. If the Leafs beat us, then

58:36

I'm rooting for them the rest of the way because

58:38

how long is

58:40

that fan base supposed to suffer? And number

58:42

two, evidently

58:45

it pisses off Canadian fans. I

58:49

mean, I get it if you're a Canadian fan

58:51

and you're fucking in your seventies. And

58:55

you realize how old you have to be to remember

58:57

the last fucking Maple

59:00

Leafs? Like I'd say you have

59:02

to be at least eight years old plus

59:05

57 years, 65. Can

59:09

you imagine that? Then you

59:11

got your little fucking Stanley Cup championship shirt

59:17

and then you go eight to You

59:19

know, they had a little bit of a drought, 28. Fuck's

59:21

going on. Still

59:30

not called curse. That's

59:33

like an East Coast thing. East

59:35

Coast people are fucking mean when it comes to shit like

59:38

that. You

59:40

know, look at the Chicago

59:42

Cubs. When

59:44

was the last time, you know, before they won it the

59:46

last time? What was the year when they won it before?

59:49

Nobody knows. I don't even know. I don't even know something.

59:53

No one was chanting 1907 or 1908, whatever the fuck it was. Nobody

59:57

was doing that. Then

1:00:02

you go out there and

1:00:05

the people out there are no more nicer. They're

1:00:08

pleasant. I would say people in the Midwest, they're

1:00:10

pleasant. They

1:00:12

have a more pleasant demeanor about them, but

1:00:14

they're not nice. All

1:00:16

right. I

1:00:20

don't know what I'm doing right now. I got to

1:00:22

fucking get on with my day. Thank you so much

1:00:24

for listening to the podcast. God bless

1:00:26

all of you. Thank you

1:00:28

for going on the internet and figuring out what is

1:00:30

going on in the world. You'd

1:00:33

think if you spent 1,500 hours figuring

1:00:35

that out, you could spend another fucking

1:00:37

600 hours and come up with a

1:00:39

solution. All

1:00:41

right. Go fuck yourselves. I'll check in on

1:00:44

you on Thursday.