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Music.

0:06

Danny you're full of energy bring us in hey everybody welcome

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to episode 163 of the boys are back the boys are back in town pedro lima kermit

0:19

gonzalez back from our uh cross-country escapades and the dying danny davenport

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everybody sorry triple d. Oh, it's been, uh, I'm still recovering, I think, or maybe I'm,

0:34

it was such a fun, chronic.

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It was, it was such a fun trip and I was expecting the worst.

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For those of you that don't know, we went to New Jersey, Newark for UFC 302.

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So what you say is we went to Newark, New Jersey, Newark, New Jersey, Newark, New Jersey.

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It was fun, man. It was fun. were you like me

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though and you expected at some point

1:01

because of all the unusual travel arrangements

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we had to make to get there were you just

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waiting for something to fuck it up like it had to right I was expecting the

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worst from the airplane ride period and everything was just great the only part

1:21

so let's Let's recap the whole travel thing.

1:26

And we're going to be jumping around because I'm pretty sure we're going to leave things out and blah, blah, blah. Correct.

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So we'll try and make it general for those people that have never traveled before

1:33

or they've traveled, they can relate to this. We're trying to make it chronological here.

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Yeah. So memento style. Yeah.

1:40

So me and Kermit got to travel together for the first time.

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Danny had a different travel because Danny had to report to work in Georgia.

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So he drove the night

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before from orlando to atlanta

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just to drop off the car yeah i

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basically drove to the airport so i can park the car at the airport and it be

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there when we got when i got back so that i could be there in time for work

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you're atlanta's notorious for like you gotta You got to take a train and several stops.

2:19

How was your experience at the Atlanta airport? So not bad. I found I was able

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to get a hotel right next to the airport. Okay.

2:26

I thought about just having, leaving my truck at the hotel and catching the

2:30

train to the airport. Yeah. But because of where the hotel was, I thought that's probably not a good idea. Okay. Okay.

2:37

I'd like to have my truck intact when I got back to it.

2:41

Location. Yeah. Yeah, so I drove it to the airport for about four o'clock in

2:45

the morning, Saturday, parked it in a good spot.

2:48

The truck barely fits in. I'm fucking barely. That thing barely fits anywhere.

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It's good. I was touching sprinkler heads with that antenna.

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Got it parked, got on the plane. By the way, I, you know, Atlanta is a super busy airport.

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It's more, it's busier than Orlando and Orlando is a top five or whatever fucking airport.

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And I was in there, my flight left at like 620.

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I got there at like four and I was, I was at my gate waiting at four 15,

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four 30. Like it took no time to get in.

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And so then I got to sit there and watch you, you be upset. because you thought

3:30

he was going to be late. We got to talk a little bit, and that was fun.

3:34

But yeah, no problems. Got on the plane and headed to Newark.

3:37

What about you guys? This guy wanted to be at the airport like two hours early, bro.

3:41

That's what you're supposed to be. Yeah. Why? I'm not wrong on this.

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So he calls me. I think it was like 4.30. 30.

3:47

At the time that we're supposed to be at your house at 4.30.

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30-ish. I got there. He adds, hello. Closer to five. He calls me. Where are you? Hello?

3:57

What's up? So no, no, no, don't, don't, no, Kermit, no.

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I really thought he was in bed. I was out front. I was so angry.

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It was better than coffee. I was so angry. No, no, no.

4:23

But we got to do the Terminal C and I got to see the new.

4:27

No hold up time out oh you're jumping ahead i skip what did

4:30

i skip picks me up oh i i go

4:33

you you guys said yeah my baby got measles oh that's right but i gotta go but

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i gotta go sorry mama i love you daddy's gotta go baby woke up with with he

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goes he goes man rough night rough night it's like oh you couldn't sleep you're

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nervous about the flight it's like nah baby baby had some Some rash,

4:52

like some bumps, some red rashes bumping on her.

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I'm like, what the fuck? Are you traveling with measles?

5:01

Bro, I didn't sleep that whole day, that whole night. I was like,

5:04

oh, I'm going to get bed early, get some, nope. I stayed up, played video games and just watched her. So we drive to the airport.

5:12

First time for you that you've ever been to Terminal C in Orlando?

5:16

Yeah. Terminal C, which is, it feels like a whole different airport.

5:19

It's beautiful, isn't it? It's gorgeous. Yeah. Yeah, it's a lot of walking. But for some reason, parking was packed.

5:26

Oh, really? Yeah. It was packed. We had to park at the very tippy top,

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which means the car's going to be baking.

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Oh, yeah, it will. While we're away. Yeah. We get out, boom,

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walk through the empty thing.

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It's empty. We still got to do that stupid mouse mace kind of thing. thing.

5:52

Go go to the to the line to

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do the shoes you know i mean to

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take off the the the the tsa part

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whatever yeah the check-in and it's only one side's working okay oh okay yeah

6:08

because early in the morning yeah hey fine guess who doesn't have patience not

6:12

a long oh you yeah oh yeah there's no way so this this cockeyed tsa guy's staring

6:17

there he's making a scene and i'm not No, I'm not making a scene.

6:21

Oh, my gosh, bro. I'm trying to get his attention.

6:24

Bro, he's flagging the guy down like he's landing an airplane on the runway.

6:28

I'm trying to catch one of his eyes.

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One of his. I don't know if it's the left eye or the right eye, so I'm going like this.

6:36

He's like, hey, hey, hey. I'm looking. I'm like, what are you doing?

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What the fuck? This thing is empty. There must be a reason. Yes. Tell me the reason, guy.

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They don't tell you shit. Who are you? Tell me. Tell me. I'm the traveler here.

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Tell me the reason i like that it really wasn't all that backed up you were

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just even faster danny there's no reason for me to be this bro jacked up and

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we're still early we wasn't like oh yeah hella early the line's really not all

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that long in front of you no not at all,

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He was having a shit. I don't like to be ignored.

7:14

I could do this better. Everybody listen. First of all, that little bullshit

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fucking security guard outfit that makes you look like a pilot ain't scaring

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anybody, cockeyed fuck. I agree with that.

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I do agree with that. And another thing, why are we still taking off the fucking shoes?

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Because there might be shit in the shoes. We're the only country that does the

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fucking shoes. Not even every airport does that.

7:36

Not even every airport does the shoes. It's just some of them.

7:39

If you pay extra you can keep your shoes yeah it's fucking stupid.

7:46

Enough with the fucking taking off the shoes you have

7:49

to take off the shoes they gotta scan it because you could be like uh like 007

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have a little knife in the shoe or like click clack and then like little spinners

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come out i tell you what i honestly i don't think anymore as soft of a fucking

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generation have we become i'm pretty sure people are alert that if a motherfucker gets,

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up and says i'm taking this point before he

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can finish oh the taking over part

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oh dude you think so yeah fuck

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yeah 100 i have a feeling people

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would bitch out especially pulls out like a little blade a little blade yeah

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i'd be surprised no i'd be surprised i wouldn't be surprised that he'd fucking

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slice me up and kill me right but there's no way i'm letting no and me Me and

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probably a hundred other people on that plane will fucking just dogpile.

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We've been through it. So it was like, you know what I mean? I don't think it's an option anymore.

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I will say this though. I don't know what, I don't know what list I got put

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on at some point or, or what I'm handling in my day to day life.

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But I, once again, on the trip from Atlanta to Newark, once again,

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had to be pulled aside side and have

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my hands swabbed for explosive material wow and this is like the fourth time

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this has happened to me that's how white you are and nobody else i know of even

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has because you look like you have a gunpowder face but i don't you look like

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me travel with a manifesto yeah.

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That's just my five o'clock shadow now that's gunpowder on his face i don't

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know where this This is like the fourth time this has happened.

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Yeah. You do have a Richard Jewell look recently since you quit smoking.

9:34

Yeah, you got that I like trains look. Yeah. Yeah.

9:38

I don't know man I'm gonna pat you down They did it again I had nothing Scanned

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on the thing And they take a little thingy And they rub it like this,

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That's how white you are See if your fucking hand explodes I guess In Atlanta

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that's how white you are You're not country white You are Michigan militia white Yeah.

10:06

They like swabbed that That motherfucker's hands.

10:09

That's funny. They checking it. I don't know for what.

10:12

Anyways. We went, had breakfast. The luxurious Chick-fil-A. Chick-fil-A. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

10:18

First time he had the chicken biscuit sandwich. The first time I ever had breakfast. I don't really. I never.

10:24

I want Chick-fil-A. This was in the airport, right? After you got through.

10:27

In the airport. And then this. While we're eating. We're eating.

10:31

This one I forgot. The homeboy's on steroids. Right. Oh, yeah.

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Because of his injuries. Yeah. You know how I could tell he was on steroid?

10:40

Because he was talking at a level. Oh, my God.

10:44

Just like jacked up. And I told him before, I was like, Pedro,

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if I get loud or you catch me, yo, check me. You have to quiet you down.

10:52

Check me because I'm not on. And bro, I was like, yo, have you seen this chick tit?

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There's a five-year-old girl next to us. And I go, yo.

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I had to look at him. jesus christ like one of my kids yo.

11:13

Yo i'm on vacation jesus christ

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and it was early as fuck

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it was early dude and i was jacked on golly i was ready so then i landed i landed

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about an hour before you guys did i don't think anything eventful happened i

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did eat at guy fieri's fucking wagon wheel oh yeah I forget what that place

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is called. What did you have? Did you have the fire wagon? I had the breakfast. Granville egg?

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I had the breakfast sandwich thing that cost like $27.

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Goddamn, damn. I mean, we drank there. And it was fucking gross.

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It was gross. It was gross. Airport food is gross.

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There's no airport that has, like, man, you got to try this.

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Oh, okay. That's why you stick to what you know. Like, if there's a Longhorn

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or a Firehouse or whatever. I was telling Danny, Danny, you're in Atlanta.

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I bet you there's a Popeye's or a Chick-fil-A open. Go get the chicken.

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They do the chicken good. Is that where you think I belong at 4 o'clock in the morning with the Popeye's in Atlanta?

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It's open. They do the chicken biscuit. You think TSA looked at me suspicious.

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What do you think what do you think the line cooks are gonna think

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when i walk in at four o'clock in the morning cop in atlanta

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yeah yeah so no can i tell you i really like this look the bahama look yeah

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dude like i like it's like a magnum pi kind of throwback hawaiian shirt yeah

12:37

for sure i don't i actually don't mind it i don't this is like the third time this should be a new

12:44

thing yeah yeah like junior hoover yeah junior certainly certainly makes me

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feel so much happier yeah yeah i can say yeah got the sunglasses on don't i

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give that yeah you get that vibe it's a i'm doing good okay vibe we land we

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landed to be greeted by you,

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i get off the plane He told me to not do no pull.

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The flight was good. I slept through the flight that you slept.

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On the first one. On the first one. Yeah, both of them, actually. Yeah. Dude, I was out.

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I told the guy that was sitting next to me, I was like, look,

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I don't normally fall asleep on planes, but it's early.

13:30

And I might fall asleep. If I start snoring, can you please wake me up?

13:34

Like this is a stranger yeah you have to

13:37

wake me up dude i don't want to be the guy fucking just cracking pipes on this

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plane and he never woke me up but i did wake myself up once snoring and i was

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mad at him you know what i mean like you have one job isn't it weird when you,

13:55

Like, I've woken myself up, right? But I'm like, did I snore?

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And he's like, no, I wasn't that loud. That's the way I was loud.

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And then out of the kitchen, it'll be Lisa and me like, you snore, you snore like a bitch.

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So fucking loud, I had to go to the kitchen. He's like, why didn't you wake

14:16

me up? You look so peaceful. You look so peaceful.

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I met a new friend that Pedro didn't prove up. Oh, this motherfucker.

14:23

Motherfucker suave captain over here this motherfucker pulling hoes in different

14:30

fucking airports oh i didn't know about that her name was gloria gloria yeah

14:35

i introduced myself as rex, wait so stupid wait wait so stupid wait what do you mean you introduced yourself

14:43

as rex so he goes hi i'm gloria go hi i'm rex why it felt good i'm on vacation it's a steroid rex,

14:53

blame it on this oh my god rex rex and i work at an amusement park yeah.

15:00

Okay that's that was my story oh my god

15:02

kermit what you're dumb how am i dumb how

15:06

am i dumb fuck you just make up stories bro i had two kids

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uh i'm on vacation i made up a whole bullshit story i mean two kids i'm going

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up there to visit my friend's family because uh i'm trying to figure things

15:20

out your story so many holes I know who cares you're not good at on the fly,

15:30

no bro Rex doesn't think Rex just told me that is Kermit was on point Rex and

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Kermit the same people they don't think I know what'll throw him off I'll play

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a character who can't think.

15:50

This is just a character I'm playing, guys. I can't think.

15:53

Isn't it funny? Me and my best friend Donkey over there going up. You an old donkey?

15:59

That's your friend's name, Donkey? Yep. Dong. Oh, shit.

16:04

Yeah, I had no issues on the flight. You guys didn't either,

16:06

it seems like. No, no, dude. I was waiting for delays or anything like that. Smooth flight.

16:12

But then here we are. Fast forward. Anything. We land in Jersey Yep,

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And it's early. The fight's not until 6 o'clock. And it is 9.30,

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10 o'clock in the morning. It's like, what are we going to do?

16:24

I'm like, well. Tour guy Lima. Here he comes.

16:28

Do you guys want to get a little taste of the city? Yeah.

16:33

A little wet your beak. Let's go. The city.

16:38

First, we're trying to figure out how to get to the train station.

16:41

Oof. Yeah. That was a bitch. That would be a loss. I don't.

16:45

Yeah, dude. That shit is confusing. That is confusing. so many buses

16:48

we were walking in places where there was

16:51

nobody else and it was the right way to go and but

16:54

the whole time i'm going i don't even this seems like bro

16:57

this seems like authorized personnel only type walk

17:01

a lot of this screaming i need an adult it's so fast i

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need an adult i don't know what i'm doing help me

17:07

help help i don't know where i'm going we

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get on the train boom we get to

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to the city we get to

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penn penn station station yeah penn

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station underneath madison square yep cool ass

17:22

we're coming up this is our first

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new york this is why i

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love you new york you're a city that

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never sleeps and never fails to entertain at

17:34

any time at any time

17:37

literally the first impression the first impression it

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was at it was at the gate waiting for us

17:43

as i wish scorsese couldn't

17:46

even fucking film this yes just picture steps and

17:50

you see steps steps and then you start.

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Daylight you start seeing the daylight and you start seeing

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feet and you see sneakers and then you

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see the doors and as you open you get

18:01

the frame of the door there's three black people without

18:05

a shirt arguing and they look

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homeless but we don't know if they're homeless or

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not but the word is leave me alone i have to go on my mission mission he was.

18:17

Going on a mission he's going on a mission trying to get my mission done he

18:21

said adventure too adventure mission and i'm the i'm leading my two buddies

18:28

that never been to the city and i'm I'm concerned.

18:31

They're like, yo, what the fuck is going on? Me and Kermit are definitely hiding behind you.

18:36

100%. And I'm trying to give them the look. It's like, it's okay.

18:40

It was not okay. Just walk. Just walk. Just keep walking. Just keep on walking.

18:44

Just keep on walking. They don't exist. Just walk past it. Don't interact.

18:50

But shouldn't we help them? No. Why?

18:53

That was another fear of mine, of Danny wanting to help people.

18:59

You don't help people. They can faint in between the subway cart.

19:05

You just walk over them and get to your seat. don't

19:09

ever help anybody it's a

19:12

trap it's a trap so so

19:15

we're walking we're walking and i'm like

19:18

hey to my left in medicine square garden that's pretty cool look kermit to the

19:22

right you can see a little bit of the empire state building yep we'll walk that

19:26

way you can get better look let's just walk down the street and then let's hang

19:31

a right and then we'll walk to time square because Because we have nothing but time. Sure.

19:37

First off, very different interaction experience than what you're explaining.

19:41

Okay, but keep going. Oh, tell me what the differences are. Oh,

19:44

the difference of you going, hey, Kermit, there's a skyscraper.

19:48

Hey, Kermit, that building. Keep moving.

19:50

No. No. Pedro. Time out. What's that? As a matter of fact, no, no, no, no, no.

19:55

Thank you for reminding me, dude. He was the worst tour guide ever.

19:58

Thank you for reminding me. Oh, you suck at tour guide.

20:01

Rewind. Oh, my God. Rewind. I was wondering if you were going to bring this up. talking about.

20:05

Rewind. Because you skipped over some stuff.

20:08

Yes, I did. You could have asked one question. Not one. Hey,

20:12

Pedro, I don't... Whatever, bro. Whatever.

20:15

It's Swamp Lake, okay? It's Swamp Lake. That's what it is. Relax.

20:19

Rewind. As I'm directing them, hey, we're going to catch this train.

20:23

We're going to get the train to Penn Station. We're going to train.

20:26

These idiots, every bridge they see, every building they see, Pedro, what's that?

20:34

At what bridge is that pedro what bridge is that first

20:37

of all pedro what building is it is that a high pedro what

20:39

bridge is that hey man hey is that what what lake

20:42

is that like like motherfucking white what bridge hey

20:45

it was a big it was a big bridge it was also all

20:49

you new yorkers know all that you're like oh this is that's on that's on

20:51

26th oh you don't want to take you don't want to take the fucking

20:54

pele bridge across over between 10

20:57

and 4 because that's when the fucking bats are there or whatever

21:00

the fuck you guys are all your little yeah that's rush hour rat traffic yeah

21:04

all right so i go what's that bridge what is that gigantic ass bridge that i've

21:09

seen in in textbooks and movies what is that one oh fuck what i know what brie

21:13

oh here we go everybody guys fucking ask a bunch of questions it's just a guy

21:17

from new york to new york questions holy crap.

21:23

Just like Pedro. Yeah, you were so mad at us. We didn't even get across the

21:26

fucking river into the city yet. We go, hey, what's that? What is that, Pedro? Is that like a special bridge?

21:32

Oh, geez. It was like traveling with five-year-olds.

21:35

Yeah, I've never been there. What's that? What's that? What bridge is that?

21:38

What's it? Fucking, I don't fucking know, dude. Okay.

21:42

So, yeah. So, we bridge in New Jersey? I don't know if fucking bridges in New

21:45

Jersey. So, you're saying you felt like you did. Yeah. So, the sightseeing of New York was Pedro going, keep moving.

21:51

Keep moving. Keep moving. Keep moving. wait pedro is that i was just

21:53

keep moving i try to pull my camera just a video no don't

21:57

do that keep walking okay even there

22:01

is one video you have of him going no no no

22:04

don't videotape don't it's against new york rules to enjoy the moment no it's

22:11

just i forget what it was i know he goes oh no casey kept asking we're building

22:15

this after i showed him them i asked a serious question he He was at every single

22:20

building there was. What building is that?

22:23

Motherfucker, it says Macy's. It's the Macy's building.

22:26

What the fuck you want? But I was asking legit good questions,

22:30

though. Is this where they place the floats?

22:32

Yes. The Ghostbuster building. The Ghostbuster building. That was a good question.

22:36

This motherfucker wanted to go to the Ghostbuster firehouse. Yeah.

22:39

Yeah. Which I didn't know it was real. It's real.

22:44

It's a real thing. Which earmarked that. because there's a fucking idiot that's

22:48

going to fucking Ghostbuster Day or whatever the fuck it is.

22:52

I don't know. And he was identified on the plane as, hey, are you the guy that

22:57

was in the extra credit from the worst Ghostbuster movie of the franchise?

23:07

I didn't even think I finished him. Is this a good time? I did finish it.

23:12

Is this a good time to bring up the smell of New York? Boy, oh boy.

23:18

Hold on. As we're walking past Madison Square Garden and teaching them,

23:24

it was like, look at this. A collective fortune cookie of people.

23:33

Oh, yes. I don't know what you call a gathering of Asians, A kamikaze of Asians.

23:41

I don't think that's what you call them. I don't think. A ninjutsu. I don't think that's it. Of something.

23:50

Anyway, there were four Jesus Christ. Yeah.

23:53

There was a math team there that was really pro-Jesus on the thing,

23:59

which I had never seen before. Yes. Yeah, it's a stir-fry group. Just at the top of their lungs,

24:03

believe in Jesus Christ. Christ. Jesus Christ.

24:08

Bereaved bereaved in jesus christ there were so

24:11

many so many i didn't know that i didn't know they were

24:14

so catholic or so christian or so jesus like

24:18

i didn't know that either and it was it was exclusively reiki jesus christy

24:22

it was exclusively asian yeah too and then yeah yeah i don't know who they were

24:27

recruiting for they saw my my eyes and they're like y'all get them no no no

24:33

no i'm I'm good. I'm good. No Filipinos.

24:37

No Filipinos. Bruno Miles is here. They were aggressive, too. They were super aggressive.

24:45

Which, it is New York City. Right. Yeah.

24:49

Aggressiveness and stuff like that. Yeah. And just as aggressive as the people, so are the smells.

24:55

Boy. I mean, it was. And they change within the corner you turn. It was a lot, Pedro.

25:01

I mean, it was a lot. When I say a lot, unacceptable.

25:05

It is, and it wasn't even summer. You didn't get peak smell.

25:10

That's- It was the hottest day in spring, the day that we landed. Right.

25:16

So you got a... Like a glimpse. Like an appetizer of smells.

25:22

The best quote was, I don't know which one of you said it. I think it was Kermit

25:27

who said it. It'd be like, how can people eat out here?

25:30

Yeah, bro. I was just like, I don't know. It's fucking bad.

25:33

How can you eat? Dude, it's just so much. Because it doesn't just smell like shit or pee. It smells like 50 different shits and pees.

25:42

It's garbage. And mixing pot. And then you get the fumes from the subway.

25:46

And then you get the fumes from the buses yeah the subways were all steaming

25:52

up there was steam coming out of the sewer and it's 12.

25:58

It's not the right it is not the right outside conditions for it to turn to steam,

26:04

steam would be like if it's hot there and it's cold up here but it was fucking

26:07

hot how hot and nasty but as we're walking to Times Square I'm starting to realize I left,

26:16

left and the whole city has changed right because

26:20

i couldn't recognize it oh okay i didn't

26:23

know that so you're kind of yeah i was kind of like at the same way that you

26:26

guys were like looking at stuff right i was like i don't remember this like

26:31

fucking bike lanes and then part of time square is now like a fucking walkway

26:38

yeah and yeah you were surprised at that when all those people were

26:43

gathered up yeah i'm like well yo is there a parade happening

26:46

and stuff like that it's like no they got steps now and

26:48

bleachers like bleachers and performance center and stuff like that it felt

26:53

like a outside mall that's what it really did but just another thing that kermit

26:59

said to me that was quintessential new york city he goes yo the hustle that

27:06

they have here in new york. Is way different than in orlando

27:12

yeah even the homeless people are hustling yeah

27:15

they're moving they're trying to get there they're fucking i don't

27:18

know where something something hopefully to better smells

27:21

but he goes in orlando they're

27:24

just laying around in new york they're like fucking collecting cans they're

27:29

going through garbage like they're like like human raccoons and they're just

27:33

you know what i mean like you can't spook them because they will scratch the

27:36

But these are the rabies raccoons that are out in the daytime and shit like that. Yeah.

27:42

Yay. He's in a garbage can. That's his territory.

27:45

Don't even throw anything in there right now. Just hold it and wait for the next garbage can. Yeah.

27:51

There weren't just standing there with signs like our homeless do.

27:55

These guys were on a mission to do something. On a mission, moving around.

27:59

You guys got to see Times Square. Not like I remember it, but Times Square.

28:05

Yeah, we got to see the TRL window. Yep. Which was cool. Took them to the old MTV building. Oh, I remember that.

28:10

Be like, that is where I used to work. Boom, boom, boom, boom.

28:13

I don't know what the fuck these people are here. I'm gonna be honest with you, dude.

28:17

Don't care. The go back.

28:21

No. I just, what is it to do besides just look at a bunch of stores?

28:25

Oh, no. That area. That area. That area. I feel like I've seen it. Seen it, done it.

28:31

Here's the thing. Tourist 101 is,

28:35

They're going to go Statue of Liberty, Times Square, Broadway.

28:42

I mean. And you guys did Times Square and Broadway. We were trying to get to

28:46

the Stargate to Ireland. Yeah.

28:51

The portal. The portal. The portal, which was removed.

28:55

Thank God it was removed because it just shows that human beings don't know how to behave.

29:02

No, we don't. i thought it was used perfectly

29:06

i think that's what it's for right exactly what

29:09

i would have done it was like hey we're gonna connect ireland

29:12

and united states which is a weird mix why ireland all

29:15

right party people okay party people sure

29:19

it's so weird and like the second it opened bro they were flicking each other

29:25

off yeah like violence is just when that when that dude in ireland went up to

29:32

the camera and took his phone and put a picture of the twid towers learning.

29:39

Just so how is that not hilarious hey i'm sorry because but everybody else is

29:45

flicking mom stuff like that so the people in ireland be like we just we haven't

29:49

done anything yeah i got something for you i got okay and then you know you

29:52

got girls flashing which is fun and then they They arrested that girl.

29:56

But you know what happens after that? Masturbation. Exactly. That homeless population will be like,

30:02

oh, yeah, check this out. But no, it wasn't the girl from Ireland that flashed.

30:06

It was the girl in the United States that flashed. Okay.

30:09

Yeah, so it's just uncontrolled masturbation over there in Guinness, over there in Ireland.

30:16

So we did that. We're kind of hungry. Oh, and?

30:19

You guys wanted to eat something. Bro. And I didn't know where to take you.

30:24

Right, right. But I remember my buddy, my buddy's wife posted a picture on Facebook

30:29

saying, in New York City, you're going to get a shepherd's pie from my favorite spot.

30:35

I thought my buddy was in the city. So I call him up and be like,

30:39

Jose, hey, dude, are you in the city? He goes, no, I'm in Orlando. It's like, Orlando? Oh, dude, you left already?

30:44

He's like, no, Natalie is in the city. You should go see her in Margaritaville.

30:51

And I was like, all right, cool. let her know they were

30:54

going up there went up there natalie was

30:57

fucking awesome amazing came in

31:00

clutch with the lug made nice she made

31:04

new york a better experience for sure for sure that's where he got this uh shirt

31:08

at one came out it smelled good in there yeah everything was great because she

31:14

she she's pretty much was the the executive chef or whatever it is in charge

31:20

of of bringing up that Margaritaville.

31:22

She did her time and left, and then they pull her back,

31:28

And she was giving us the whole rundown. It's an awesome, awesome place.

31:32

Go check it out, Margaritaville in Times Square.

31:34

Yeah. And then she goes, you guys want lunch?

31:37

I'm like, all right, cool. Of course. Sure. Boom. And go out there.

31:42

Here we go. This is what I wanted. I was waiting. I was going to see if you could skip over that.

31:46

I was going to make sure we hooked that. Oh, this guy. Okay. This guy, bro.

31:53

If I would have known.

31:56

Hold on, hold on. Yeah, yeah, yeah. before we before we start with somebody

31:59

ah you don't get to do this one we get to

32:02

do this one all right so you know

32:04

we get the impression that this food is

32:07

on the house yeah she goes i got you basically i'm gonna take care of you so

32:11

i order the the fish dip right yeah like a shrimp scampi yeah like with a little

32:15

bread thing and the dippy thing right or whatever and you ordered what was it

32:19

the chicken and she's like hey the jerk chicken's really good here yeah because

32:22

we asked I was like, perfect. We asked her, what's not good here? Yeah.

32:26

And honestly, she did tell us straight up. The one thing. The one thing.

32:31

She said two things. But the one, yeah. And then we asked the bartender,

32:34

and the bartender was like, And then I go, what's good? And the bartender said, hey, this is good.

32:40

So I got the fish dip, which I think was actually an appetizer.

32:43

Right. And Kermit got the chicken. Just jerk chicken with vegetables. Cool.

32:47

And Pedro ordered the most expensive thing on the menu. Bro.

32:53

I looked at him. I was like, okay. Bro. He said it. Okay. He said it. And I went, goodness. Like,

33:01

in my mind, I went, goodness. Goodness. Boy, oh, boy. Boy, when he said ribs and chicken, I looked at him and I go, oh.

33:11

Because when you ordered it for a moment, I thought, oh, this will be the moment

33:15

where now she realizes I'm not going to take care of them. Right.

33:20

Now I have to pay for my fucking fish dip. I thought we were about to lose our

33:24

little meal ticket thing. Because if that was a case. Your greed.

33:28

If that was a case, I was going to be like, yo, I should get another appetizer.

33:31

Like, I should have. We should have. Can I tell you something?

33:33

Bro, you got the most. expensive dish on the

33:36

menu i didn't think it was the most expensive i know i know

33:39

you didn't i didn't because afterwards we said something to

33:42

you and you were like no it wasn't we're like no it was i

33:45

was like you know you're fucking with me it's it's it's chicken it was more

33:49

expensive than the fucking seat it was the most expensive thing fucking sushi

33:55

grade and i'm like all those and i go to carmen be like motherfucker you could

34:00

have hit me up be like yo i'm not gonna tell you what I'm on vacation.

34:05

Yeah. Okay. But you see, hey, if I'm being loud, look out for me. Let me know.

34:10

Pedro, come on. This is my fault here? No. No, no, no, no. But you did let me

34:16

drown. I didn't let you drown. I let you eat on a yacht. That's what I let you do.

34:21

You were like, I want chicken and ribs. And I went, cool.

34:26

And I was just like, I was like, Pedro's eating.

34:30

That way he doesn't have to worry about eating at the fight. so i was

34:32

like all right so yeah oh

34:36

it's free let me uh let me

34:39

see can you sort this menu

34:42

by price please i'll take the top he

34:45

got the farm man king of new york over here

34:48

with the biggest can you bring the trash can

34:51

full of barbecue for me they brought him

34:54

a monocle when he was eating yes i was

34:57

so afterwards afterwards i was so embarrassed do

35:01

you suck the meat off that bone you're i was so fucking embarrassed i think

35:06

you'd even finish it you didn't finish it you didn't finish the chicken because

35:10

i had to eat it because how could you it was enormous yeah that's what he goes

35:16

he goes he goes hey y'all you want to do the chicken.

35:21

Oh you know what i did try to stop you i did

35:24

you looked at me you go yo you want to share chicken

35:27

and ribs and i go i really don't want ribs and you

35:30

went all right and that was it so officially you should have looked at and go

35:36

i don't want all this and pick something else but you were like nope give me

35:41

it all because i knew if you didn't finish what's gonna fucking help me Danny didn't even touch it.

35:48

I wanted no part of it. Dude, he went with the cheapest thing on the plate. You were the one.

35:57

The fucking lion's head came out of the ground, and all the other stuff was

36:01

available, but you wanted the fucking genie lamp, and that's what you got.

36:05

Keep my fucking hands off it. Happy with my little appetizer?

36:09

What is it? It's poor. What's it? Poor form?

36:12

It's poor form. when somebody says i'm gonna

36:15

take care of of lunch and stuff like that and

36:18

grabbing the most expensive but but i

36:21

did not realize in your defense you didn't know you didn't know because you

36:25

argued with us when we told you it was the most expensive you were like you

36:29

know like you didn't like that we were even you thought mine was expensive like

36:32

the most i was like no it's not but it was and it was so that's the first thing

36:36

i looked i looked at prices before i ordered i was I was like,

36:39

all right, I'm not going over 30. Like, even thinking about it now, my body's going through chills.

36:45

I feel fucking- Not for nothing, though. She was fine with it.

36:48

She was totally cool with it. Oh, yeah, yeah. She's dope. Natalie is- We just had to give you shit. And the thing was,

36:53

they met before, because Kermit was a DJ at Brianna's, 16, and my friend Jose

37:00

brought her, and then they took over the kitchen.

37:04

At breeze at breeze like fucking they

37:07

make sure all the food was oh that's cool hey that's the

37:10

the the drinks are not fucking getting

37:14

cold fast enough who got salt put it

37:18

in the ice bro they all these fucking tricks that i

37:20

learned oh my god it was around this point in time too

37:23

where i got a text from alissa that said oh

37:27

that said don't let pedro no pay for the most expensive

37:30

thing in the menu i got a text from melissa that said selah

37:34

wants to know if you've seen any of the fancy

37:37

new york birds and i

37:40

was like what and then she texted me later

37:43

and she goes after a long line of questioning we figured out that she meant

37:47

pigeons the fancy new york so i spent one with a top hat so i spent some time

37:55

trying to find pick try to take pictures of pigeons and they're There are not

37:58

a lot of them in the city, apparently. Not as many as I thought. Yeah.

38:01

It's a huge thing, dude. But they're still there. They probably homes move. Eat them.

38:04

So this new Times Square is fucking different. Yeah.

38:09

Because old Times Square, you would see those fucking pigeons flying through

38:13

people's faces all the time. They moved out, man. They fucking, they got a bike lane.

38:21

Is that a big deal? A bike lane? I guess so. Okay. Well, you saw those city

38:25

bikes. Yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah. Which I don't know why would you get one because you can't move so many people

38:32

walking. There's so many. Where are you going to ride that city bike on?

38:35

Because the people are walking on the bike lane. They don't care.

38:38

I will say, obviously, we only spent the amount of time we did there. We spent like two hours.

38:43

Yeah, and it was Times Square and stuff like that. But I will say,

38:46

if the rest of New York is anything like that as far as walking around and things

38:51

like that, I don't know about you guys, but I walked around there.

38:54

Feeling like there was threats coming from every direction a

38:57

fucking cab or a bike or a

39:00

pickpocket or somebody fucking like so that

39:03

was beauty it was that beauty of new york city

39:06

i don't like it i love it it's not

39:09

yeah there's no casual i love the chaos i love

39:12

the chaos what's the first thing i told you guys when we

39:15

got off the fucking the the penn station train hold your

39:18

phone hey put your fucking wallets in the front yeah

39:21

yeah yeah it did it felt like it

39:24

felt like walking through like fucking fallujah just wondering

39:28

where the shots coming from skinny on the roof yeah

39:31

is this bag on the roof is this bag an ied yeah

39:34

the fuck yeah there was a homeless guy with

39:37

a hotel cart oh yeah hat on it

39:40

yeah he had a luggage cart and fucking

39:43

clothes hampers full of things yelling out the way

39:46

out the way pushing through the crowd and

39:49

people are just parting ways it's definitely crazy

39:52

too because like for me i don't know it just felt like the buildings closed

39:55

in for you dude i must have been fucking oh yeah because of how small how little

40:00

you are you were like stewart little first off there's a lot of short people

40:03

in new york i realized because i was walking around like look at this little

40:05

guy hey baby man get the hell out the way yeah Yeah, there's a lot of short people there.

40:12

But, dude, it's just so claustrophobic, too. I really wish we would have gotten

40:16

there maybe a day or two days before. I think we could plan a trip.

40:21

And maybe give us an extra day or two to see all the happy horseshit you go

40:26

see. I really would love to take you guys to Spanish Harlem.

40:30

Right. Take you to. I'd like to see all that stuff. I know better now than to ask.

40:36

Take Danny to the Disneyland. I know I won't ask. New York City for him, which would be the 9-11 Memorial.

40:42

I would like to see that, honestly. Yeah? Yeah, just to see what they did with

40:46

it. It makes, bro, the magnitude of it.

40:49

Right. It makes you feel so small. Right.

40:53

Wasn't there a big hole there now? Yeah, where the two buildings used to be.

40:58

Yeah, some guy fell in it. Is it just full of garbage now? Because if you fucking...

41:03

Yeah, good question. Out of all things, they really haven't fucked that place

41:07

up because... Well, there is a guy that went head first in it.

41:11

Yeah, he's still down there. He's probably still an idiot. Yeah. There's always going to be people that need attention.

41:16

I'm surprised people don't throw their fucking hot dog papers down.

41:19

I've seen a breakup happen once when me and Lisa went there with the kids.

41:25

We're walking. We saw it. And then there's a guy breaking up with the girl.

41:30

And the girl threw a scream. And everybody turned around like if somebody got stabbed.

41:37

And me and Lisa go, just a breakup. Just a breakup.

41:42

Nothing. Just keep on walking. It would be fun. I know better than to ask you

41:45

any questions when we go up there again. But I'll just. New York questions, it's okay. Just be quiet.

41:51

Jersey questions, I don't know fucking what's connecting out there.

41:54

Okay. Now, Jersey, on the other hand. Yeah.

41:57

What a city. So we headed back. We headed back. Yep.

42:01

Back on the Penn Station. Hey, getting that Uber was interesting.

42:06

Which one? Fucking the first one. Because it's like, all right,

42:10

we got to wait, and we're waiting.

42:12

The one Danny got, I hated it. I hated that guy.

42:15

Guy the one of no ac windows down oh

42:18

yeah dude what the fuck dude it was hot running running

42:22

red lights i was like what is happening wait are you talking about the one at

42:25

night no the red light guy was at night yeah the the windows down windows down

42:29

no ac yeah oh hey uber drivers let me tell you something you're an uber driver

42:35

right have some decency of picking up your trash that way

42:40

we don't have to move it to sit on it bro what is

42:43

that about don't you dare ask for a rate i didn't rate anyone there you're lucky

42:47

i gave you even like looked at it you lucky i even got in the car bro and then

42:52

like we say we're gonna pick up five people all the seats are down put the seats

42:57

up we gotta do the seats hold on dude you're jumping way ahead oh okay yeah but still,

43:03

anyways we're in jersey i know you're excited i'm just just saying that was

43:07

my jersey that was my We get to the Airbnb.

43:10

I was expecting it to be like a rat hole.

43:14

I did too. I did too. Really? Well, based on the houses I saw in the area. Oh, okay.

43:20

It's beautiful. It's fucking amazing. It's better than hotels I've ever stayed in. Oh, for sure.

43:27

That's Airbnb. The dude opened my eye on how I should do the beach house in Puerto Rico. Oh, okay.

43:36

Smart. Because the dude had towels in each bed.

43:41

He had fucking toothbrushes for everybody sealed. Snacks.

43:48

Snacks. Drinks. Drinks. when you take

43:50

a shower there's a pump for soap a pump for

43:53

shampoo pump for conditioner let me tell you something that

43:56

doesn't happen at airbnbs that doesn't ever

43:59

happen they almost never leave snacks you might luck up and get one where they've

44:03

left left you some coffee that might be it some salt and pepper or whatever

44:07

the other people left there for seasonings but you're not getting snacks and

44:11

drinks at most airbnbs we were there he's giving us the tour of the top floor

44:15

boom if you are you You guys cooking anything like that? We're not going to cook.

44:19

He goes, well, if you're going to do this, this is giving us the rundown. You want coffee?

44:23

Here's the coffee. Here's the K-Cups, stuff like that. He's showing us everything's

44:27

gorgeous. We go downstairs. Dude, it's a game room in the basement. Yeah. He has that one arcade, which is dope.

44:34

A popcorn machine, snacks, a fridge with sodas, a foosball table. Air hockey. Air hockey.

44:43

Another TV, like another room down there. there's spare

44:46

fucking air mattresses if you need then he takes

44:49

us to the backyard fucking more like

44:52

the gorgeousness kept stacking it really did here's

44:55

the part that i got annoyed oh okay we

44:59

got there right then everybody started

45:02

arriving darren shows up boom then preacher justin

45:06

and ruben showed up and we

45:10

do the tour we're hanging out in the back

45:13

you know ruben comes in came with a fucking

45:15

drink started leaving shit oh really

45:20

just like like just like he finished a

45:23

gatorade yeah just left the thing there just walked

45:27

away typical single guy doesn't have

45:31

any responsibilities you notice that too huh oh dude it

45:33

fucking hurt the fuck out i wasn't paying attention the next

45:36

the next morning was picking up soda cans and

45:40

yeah yeah i cleaned up but i mean

45:42

i get what you're saying yeah it's kind of weird it's like

45:45

dude leave the it's better than

45:48

leave the place how it was and i bear the animal like the towels like i went

45:53

and picked up everyone's towels and i get it you want to do it at a hotel but

45:57

even at a hotel don't fucking just leave cans out in the open okay i'm gonna

46:02

plead the fifth on that i'll just say fucking hotel i hide I ate them under the pillow.

46:08

Fuck you. I used the sheets as a napkin. Yeah. Yeah, but they wash those.

46:13

You know what I mean? Yeah. I'm just saying, make it least, especially if you're not the one.

46:20

Who got the airbnb for sure got you and the fact the fact honestly that i mean

46:27

unless you stay maybe if you don't stay in airbnbs you don't know but this was

46:30

an exceptional air bro it was honestly this was five star if i ever decide to

46:37

let's say there's an event in newark.

46:40

I'm going to that that's the one well 100 i'm hitting

46:44

a preacher preacher how much is give me

46:48

the contact can you get it for me yeah for sure i

46:51

know the price how much it was but yeah yeah i did for

46:54

them and that's what's aggravating is the reason why most air

46:57

and b&b's don't leave snacks and shit like that is because it creates a mess

47:00

and so if you don't if you luck up into one where they've got all that stuff

47:05

like fucking well there's also automatic $150 cleaning fee yeah on top of the

47:10

your stay yeah so oh is it i wish i would have known that no but they'll hit

47:15

you up for more fees if you if you break the rules

47:18

yeah extra remember that little rule rule i

47:21

had a sign that he wanted yeah can you tell

47:24

us do you remember any of the rules that was kind of like oh no parties no noise

47:30

after like it was like 11 like in other words like you can't be having music

47:33

on loud or outside if you break anything you got to pay for it and they charge

47:39

you don't have to pay for it but i think it was like a 500 fee so if like if you broke something

47:44

in the house they wouldn't he would get you for that and then

47:46

automatically tells you right off the bat there's 150 cleaning fee

47:50

that's tacked on to the final cost yeah that's pretty normal honestly yeah and

47:55

i think that's pretty much it the rest of it just pretty much like no smoking

47:58

big time smoking smoking weed you get caught that's another now with fee was

48:03

like pretty big too that was like a 400 fee if you get caught smoking or anything like that yeah.

48:08

You could drink alcohol he said but just you know glass and all that that's

48:12

pretty much it okay so So, nothing outrageous. I've never stayed at an Airbnb. That was my first time. Oh, really? I do them all the time.

48:20

So, yeah. For sure, that was a luxury one. Yeah. That was nice. 100%.

48:27

And then, we gathered up to go to the fight. Yeah. That was next. Yep.

48:33

We piled into an Uber, all seven of us. All seven of us. We piled into one Uber.

48:38

Yeah. And got to the arena, which was not far. It wasn't very far,

48:43

fortunately. Traffic was a bitch. Yeah.

48:47

Getting into the arena wasn't a hard time. No. But that was pretty easy.

48:53

That's the arena where the Devils play? Yep. The New Jersey Devils.

48:56

Oh, that was where we also found out that Preacher had actually bought.

49:00

Eight tickets. Yeah, he had actually bought eight tickets and forgot to invite someone.

49:04

So we had one too many tickets. I wish I would have known, dude.

49:08

Yeah. That would have been an enticing kind of rule.

49:12

Be like, to my cousin, be like, hey, I got an extra ticket.

49:16

It you probably want to bring the car up but it

49:20

is such a good event had such a good time we

49:23

were there from the early prelims to the last beautiful main

49:27

event the main event was great the main event for

49:30

the most part for the most part the

49:34

the pre-fights the the not on

49:38

tv fights or fight pass fights and stuff like that they

49:41

were pretty good there wasn't many stoppages yeah

49:45

there wasn't knockouts or anything like that

49:47

no knockouts no knockouts right i don't think so a lot

49:50

of like we thought was gonna be a knockout but no

49:53

knockouts no knockouts a lot of disappointing result the co-main event was the

49:59

most disappointing let's be honest i mean that's yeah yeah very boring very

50:04

very boring yeah can i tell you what it felt being in that place because i think

50:11

I think here's my three highlights.

50:13

Okay. Give us three. Here's my three highlights. What's your three highlights?

50:16

My three highlights are in the stadium, not outside the stadium.

50:22

Whole different highlights of that. Okay.

50:25

Here are my three highlights in the event. All right.

50:30

Number, let me see.

50:33

Number three, that Argentinian chick with a big ass twerking. Oh, the fighter.

50:41

Okay, yeah. Jesus Christ. I was like, what?

50:45

Number two, Kevin Holland breaking that guy's arm. He didn't tap. Oh, man. He didn't tap.

50:52

He did not. And number one, being in the middle of a Trump rally.

50:58

Bro. bro that was that was interesting the

51:01

way that dude comes out bro with the

51:05

american badass an american badass it's it's it's so cartoonish it's like steve

51:15

austin dude it was like steve austin's

51:18

glass break when he popped up they fucking loved him it was amazing

51:23

it was it was quite a show i was and the thing is everybody all seven of us that were there,

51:31

couldn't care less no we talking about we were surrounded at that moment i was

51:37

so yeah so many people yeah that was all about it baby.

51:45

Yeah four more years they fucking

51:49

went ballistic and they showed them on they showed

51:52

them on the the screen like any time dude anytime it was a dull moment all they

51:58

had to do for these dummies was just show him his fat orange face on it usa us and the chance of usa.

52:10

It was so dumb. Let me ask you this. I think I asked you this while we were

52:14

there. You're a big soccer fan, so you watch soccer and stuff.

52:17

You're familiar with all the chants that go on around the whole world. Yes.

52:21

When it comes to American chants, we only know USA or let's go better.

52:30

Let's go better. That's it. That's all we've got, right? It doesn't apply to anything.

52:37

Derek Jeter. Yeah. Yeah. let's go

52:40

jordan fuck joe biden it's

52:44

all that's all we've got right yeah that kind

52:47

of sucks that's the simplest thing and then

52:50

you go to europe and they have they have songs

52:54

that they do on the fly i want to learn making

52:57

fun of a player's teeth and they pick it

52:59

up the crowd picks up on it and they go as a whole limerick

53:02

or about whatever about this guy's fucking ugly hair and they

53:06

got it yeah but man it's just you say you yeah

53:09

we suck at chance we suck at chance big

53:12

time that needs to change i don't know how but it

53:15

needs to change we need to get some songs or something it kind of sucks god

53:19

does definitely sucks embarrassing and here's one here's one of the main things

53:25

maybe because i think i even looked at you on this one too dustin poirier is

53:30

obviously a beloved fighter. Yes. And rightfully so.

53:34

Because the dude, you know, he's a... His body of work speaks for itself.

53:38

Yeah. He takes any... He's not a bitch. He takes any fights.

53:41

He's got, you know, whatever. He's got that dog in him, so they say, or whatever. Like, he brings the fight,

53:46

makes it exciting, such and such, yada, yada.

53:48

So I understand the crowd, I mean, just pouring love out for... Right.

53:54

Why do... People hate islam makachev enough

54:01

to really throw out some really thick

54:04

boos what did he do to deserve booing oh i mean just because we don't want him

54:10

that we didn't they didn't want him to win i mean we wanted dustin why you say

54:14

we yeah but we like the people that are going for dustin dust they wanted dustin

54:18

to win it's just but i how about this how about this we don't know any.

54:22

Other way of saying we don't want that fighter to to win

54:25

so we just boo him that's that's the american

54:28

kind of chance all right it goes into that they didn't

54:32

boo paulo the same way they booed islam they

54:36

kind of kind of did not the same level no

54:38

i think it's just a different experience because you're there you know the

54:41

different okay here's here's another thing and i i

54:44

i see where you're trying to get at

54:47

but i think paulo got hate booze islam got

54:51

booze yes but they were cheering more for dustin

54:54

number one american number two

54:57

underdog yeah that's the

55:00

thing nobody thought that he was gonna do we

55:03

all knew but we didn't want to believe yeah we all

55:07

knew he was gonna lose like there were certain fighters there

55:10

that i'm like don't bet yeah because you're gonna lose money yeah he doesn't

55:16

like fighting don't do it so i lost money i lost money that whole event so so is that now.

55:29

In front of us, there were the two Dagestani fans out there.

55:34

Yep. There's three of them. And they were so cool. Mm-hmm.

55:38

Like, they were surrounded by fucking Dustin fans. Because we were all rooting for Dustin.

55:44

Yeah. And these motherfuckers, it's like, I think I'm gonna fuck, dude.

55:48

Yeah. And nobody was gonna fuck with those guys. No. And they were tiny guys.

55:53

Yep. But nobody was gonna fuck with those guys.

55:55

No, they were not. You know what I mean? It was good energy that we were sitting

55:58

around. Yeah, dude. Yeah. It wasn't like, there were so many fights.

56:03

I only seen one. There was more than one. There was more than,

56:05

there was a couple fights, and I missed all of them.

56:08

None of them were in our area that I saw. Now, we did almost see, I saw two.

56:13

Well, that guy got his shirt yanked off. At the end, there was two.

56:17

One going after the Palestinian flag, and then the other guy that got his shirt ripped and stuff.

56:24

The energy in a play i have never been

56:26

to a ufc live event before the i've been

56:30

to raw right like and that pop

56:33

when somebody big walks out is incredible at wwe

56:36

right but that's it like that's the big holy shit crowd moment is the pop when

56:42

someone walks out yeah at the ufc thing i was amazed at the energy anytime someone

56:47

got rocked or a submission was getting close or whatever that energy was as

56:52

big as any WWE pop that I had seen live.

56:55

And it happened over and over again at this time. It was one of the fucking

56:59

coolest things I've ever seen. Yeah, any time the door is closed to something, a big punch or anything like

57:04

that, it's honestly, UFC does it right. They do it right.

57:08

Disregard the politics and everything like that. If you do have a chance to

57:12

go see a UFC event, if you had a chance to go see any MMA events.

57:20

Do yourself a favor and go check it out. The cream of the crop is UFC.

57:25

Of course. Everybody's going to try and emulate that. But the energy of a crowd

57:30

going to see organized violence is very good.

57:37

Because anytime something gets, the violence gets amped up, the crowd is fucking lit.

57:42

Love it. And it was awesome. Yeah. It really was awesome. And it was cool being,

57:47

I mean, not for nothing, just like the group we were with, it was cool hanging out with them.

57:54

It was cool getting to see Darren. I hadn't seen Darren in forever. Yeah.

57:58

Darren really wants to be on the show. And I'm like, dude, we can use that StreamYard

58:04

thing that Kermit refuses to use.

58:07

We can try. Preacher and Justin were a good hang, and Ruben brought his little

58:12

fanny pack thing, which was fun. I'm surprised they let him in with that big.

58:16

I was just like, what is this tackle box on your leg? Usually, because I saw they're like pushing guys away that had the fanny packs,

58:23

because they're too big. They're like, no, bro, you can put this in the locker. You're not coming in with that.

58:28

So I was like, oh, there's no way he's getting in with this.

58:30

And he just went right in. It brought back the times of back when I was doing comedy a lot and being around

58:40

comedians who aren't on, you know what I mean? Who aren't on in comedy mode.

58:46

It's always going to be funny like they don't you know people who are funny

58:50

don't have a choice but to be funny correct but they're not it's not running

58:53

they're not running it's not trying too hard and fuck man it's just dude we

58:58

laughed so much god damn it dude just walk walking around,

59:02

because getting an uber after event was going to be impossible yeah we knew

59:08

that was coming but before I get into that do you have any highlights of the event for you or Kermit.

59:16

I i one thing one thing that stood out was how quick

59:19

which i kind of knew this we've seen it on tv but when the

59:22

fight goes to the ground if something doesn't happen

59:25

right away that the crowd the crowd really gets

59:28

uh fucking bored you were kind of

59:31

like you were kind of upset about that shit because then one the

59:34

guy was they were working they really were working and they

59:37

were really trying to pass guard and they were really throwing shots

59:40

from above and below and and the crowd was booing them

59:43

and i was like this is yeah this is still a good fight you're

59:46

just not seeing the the fireworks that they

59:49

want to see there was a couple though that it was hug and

59:52

hold and so i get that but there was some there's also jersey crowd they don't

59:55

want they don't want no ground they don't do jiu-jitsu there there was that

59:58

one there was that one guy who was clearly a jiu-jitsu guy and he was he was

1:00:02

you know he was the doing doing the grab my own ankle over the guy's back shit

1:00:07

and they shouldn't control one guy tried to pull a omoplata off and came very

1:00:11

close to stuff. And I was like, this is fucking great.

1:00:14

And the rest of the crowd was like, boo, boo, stand up. I was like,

1:00:19

you guys are missing all of this. Great. So that was one of the, I guess, highlights, low light. One of the biggest things

1:00:24

I noticed was, uh, how quickly they would jump up. I thought it was really cool watching Theo.

1:00:30

You could see Theo Vaughn. Yeah.

1:00:33

Interacting with Dustin from where he was. And I thought that was pretty neat,

1:00:37

but no, just the, just the energy was fucking crazy, dude. Yeah.

1:00:42

You cover me? This is my third or maybe fourth. I'm going to say third.

1:00:47

Third event. And every event, they do a thing.

1:00:50

UFC does a thing where they do the build-up before the main card,

1:00:54

and they play the song from the Who. What's the name of the song? Baba Booey or some shit like that.

1:00:59

I don't know. Baba O'Reilly. Baba O'Reilly. That song is long, okay?

1:01:04

It's like a five-minute song. But, man, does that get you amped up.

1:01:09

Yeah. And I had the same feeling I had when I first went, and then this one.

1:01:13

I love that intro that I'm just like, the fucking clothes. I love that song.

1:01:21

I love the intro UFC does. Yes. It gets you high. And I love how they end it.

1:01:28

Um which they ended with the forest griffin state

1:01:31

steven right because they're acknowledging without

1:01:34

this fight none of this which is true which i don't think anybody can argue

1:01:40

anymore or at that like because that fight was what put them on the map yeah

1:01:44

right and brought them into people's living rooms and not not emory i mean we

1:01:48

get it ufc one ufc two we get it they show that.

1:01:52

Off but that forrest griffin and stephen bonner fight was like this

1:01:56

is like oh this is real like

1:01:59

this is like what is happening right now like they

1:02:02

say this is the one that you picked up the phone and call

1:02:05

your buddy and said put on spike tv that's right

1:02:08

because it wasn't even pay-per-view it was just like because it

1:02:11

was like the finale of ultimate fighter yeah

1:02:15

bro everyone's like season one right wasn't it

1:02:17

season one so good it was wild they

1:02:20

acknowledge it yeah you're right acknowledge so that was that i

1:02:23

love that build-up i love i love the energy when the lights go

1:02:26

down right before somebody walks out is

1:02:29

a fucking cool feeling too yeah like dustin's walk

1:02:32

out was very interesting this time because it was different than his normal one

1:02:35

he added that that guy who covered diamonds

1:02:39

by uh rihanna he i guess he passed

1:02:42

away lately or you know within the last little while and the

1:02:44

crowd was or the internet was trying to get him to walk out to of that song

1:02:47

and he mashed it up at the beginning with his james brown normal walkout that

1:02:52

was cool but the crowd the lights going down and then boom somebody's walkout

1:02:57

starts or whatever and everybody that's fucking awesome you've been part of

1:03:00

the preacher crew for ufc yeah how is.

1:03:04

This group compared to number one really yeah i mean i'm not gonna say because

1:03:10

the biggest one was fun guys i mean it was the same crew we i think what jb

1:03:13

didn't show up this one okay and And then Ruben wasn't at that one.

1:03:17

But it's always the click of me, Preacher, Justin, Darren.

1:03:21

That four. And now bringing you two guys, they just felt so much more fun. I was like, perfect.

1:03:26

I finally have the group. This is the group. This is the group I want every single time.

1:03:31

100% would figure out a way to make another trip work like that.

1:03:35

If all things lined up again, fuck it. Yeah, that is a crew I like.

1:03:40

This is a crew that I like going to. Dude, it was awesome. Awesome.

1:03:44

The only suggestion I gave Preacher after, hey, man, thanks for this and stuff like that.

1:03:51

Next time you do anything like this, I recommend you do this.

1:03:56

Get four seats in the corner.

1:04:00

Three in the back or whatever. Two different rows. Behind, front and back of each other?

1:04:04

Front and back rather than, because the only people I had to talk was Danny,

1:04:09

Kermit. And Darren. Darren. Yeah.

1:04:11

And I couldn't get, Justin was too far. Yeah. Preacher was all the way over there.

1:04:16

Ruben was all the way at the end. But if we're on top of it like that.

1:04:19

And aisle seats. Yeah. You know what I mean? Aisle seats for sure. For sure. For sure.

1:04:23

Bro, I was sandwiched, boy, between him and Darren.

1:04:28

I was like all right well i'm just gonna enjoy this just

1:04:32

just pedro is not built for not

1:04:35

built for those stadiums arena seating boy oh boy no i'm a sweet guy and to

1:04:42

his credit he did everything he could to make himself small mate yeah but it's

1:04:46

i'm gonna tell you though if they do another vegas one and you know if the moon's

1:04:50

in line and we get the call and i would love to go to vegas with all

1:04:54

of us and oh for sure and do that do that but

1:04:57

like i just hate the time change that's what

1:05:00

i hate about vegas man it's just so

1:05:03

hard because it's because it's midnight one o'clock over there and over there

1:05:06

it's like 10 o'clock and you get you get confused i get confused and my job

1:05:11

schedule sucks when it comes to that like i just i gotta figure it all out so

1:05:14

that's my only complaint the toughest thing after the fight was the realization

1:05:19

of how we're gonna get back that That was rough.

1:05:22

That was rough. Because all the Ubers were taken. Oh, yeah. That app was just

1:05:27

spinning, looking for people. Just looking. So we walked around.

1:05:31

Preacher thought that he was going to walk to a 7-Eleven in New Jersey.

1:05:36

I was so confused with that. Fucking 2 in the morning.

1:05:39

Like, it was like, oh, let me go get it. Be like, homie, they're not going to let you in.

1:05:43

No, it's closed. You got to order that shit through the window.

1:05:46

Yeah, you got to know what you want. I will say this. I was very glad, considering how long it took us outside,

1:05:52

I was very glad that we decided to stop and go to the bathroom before we left

1:05:56

the arena because, motherfucker, if we had to go pee on a wall.

1:06:00

I mean, shit. Bro, oh, we're skipping this part. We ran into a legend leaving.

1:06:04

Oh, yeah, dude. Freaking Mark Coleman.

1:06:07

Mark Coleman was just hanging outside with his hot daughter.

1:06:12

Waiting for a car. With all due respect. Waiting for a car. Your daughter's hot, sir. With all due respect.

1:06:19

I will ground and pound her. Hey, man. Hey. In front of my wife and you. Hey, man. What are you doing,

1:06:24

bro? He is smoking. Damn. Just smoking. I shook his hand. we all shook his hand two of them I think Darren

1:06:31

and Preacher took a photo yeah and then and Preacher and then Kermit said that he says

1:06:37

we're like oh man the guy's a hero and stuff like that he rescued his father

1:06:41

and then Kermit goes yeah but he let the dog die,

1:06:44

what a dick what a dick I wish he would've said it out loud I would've I would've

1:06:49

dragged him by the scruff of his neck and said save to his face save to his face.

1:06:57

But he could he was so nice so nice and so

1:07:00

old oh yeah of course it's crazy seeing

1:07:03

that yeah because i mean we watched him when he was a

1:07:06

monster yeah but he was so nice thank you i

1:07:09

think he has bigger mitts than you by the way he shook my hand i was like okay

1:07:13

where'd it go i was like all right i saw the guy i felt his hand it connected

1:07:17

connected yeah it connected yeah that's it was like this that's what he did

1:07:21

when he got my hand i was like oh my god it's too much but we finally got an

1:07:26

uber fine well first before the Uber,

1:07:29

we had to wait in front of,

1:07:32

Get me a banana strawberry daiquiri. Oh, yeah. That's all I'm asking for is

1:07:38

a strawberry daiquiri banana. I know you hear me.

1:07:42

Danny, stop staring at him, Kermit. I just want a strawberry banana smoothie.

1:07:47

You motherfuckers can't get me a strawberry banana smoothie.

1:07:49

You broke motherfuckers can't get me a strawberry banana smoothie.

1:07:54

And Kermit does the thing that your little kid does when he sees a person who's

1:07:58

got a face deformity or something. and just stare at him like,

1:08:02

what is... I ain't homeless!

1:08:05

I ain't homeless. I got air mattress at home. Yeah, I got air mattress and a cardboard.

1:08:10

What's wrong with his face, Dad? That's what Kermit was staring at.

1:08:14

Everybody else is ignoring. Kermit's like looking. He's like, maybe I should get him the strawberry banana.

1:08:19

Maybe he'll be quiet if I bring him the strawberry banana.

1:08:23

Don't feed him. Don't feed him? I was gonna feed him. It's like wild raccoons.

1:08:28

Newark's finest. I was gonna feed him. it

1:08:31

finally we got the the uber we

1:08:34

were all able to pile in ram in and i

1:08:39

guess during during the ride

1:08:42

i guess we're all talking and stuff like that and preacher was talking about

1:08:47

suicide or something like that about and oh yeah some somehow somehow we talk

1:08:53

about suicide oh you want me to kill myself because he's going to paris oh right

1:08:58

right and i was like oh you're gonna travel eat

1:09:00

food like you know he said oh i'm gonna be traveling eating food like

1:09:03

anthony bourdain and i go he killed himself in paris

1:09:07

because i heard he was talking about

1:09:09

suicide and stuff and then i somebody says

1:09:13

something the darren darren is

1:09:16

the one who asked the question did he did he

1:09:19

leave a note did he leave a note and i go

1:09:22

no he didn't and then this is

1:09:25

how quick this is the beauty of fucking

1:09:29

being around comics because if

1:09:33

some might be tired but one of these motherfuckers is

1:09:35

because it's three in the morning and we're fucking exhausted

1:09:38

yeah it's something's gonna happen i was just the one this time i think fucking

1:09:43

danny just goes he did he just wrote it ketchup i'm sorry he wrote the word

1:09:51

sorry ketchup so fucking funny dude dude we're crying laughing.

1:09:58

And our driver's not from uh these regions of north america.

1:10:04

And I think at one point he kind of felt like, oh, they're making fun of me.

1:10:09

So he just decided to start taking red lights. Oh, dude. Oh,

1:10:12

is that what you think happened? Just go right through the red lights. I'm being uncomfortable. Fuck these guys.

1:10:17

Let's fucking let God drop these clowns.

1:10:19

They're making fun of my music. Didn't even look both ways to cross the red lights. Just fucking just go.

1:10:27

I didn't even pay attention to that part there. I was laughing too much over the ketchup. I was in the front.

1:10:33

Right you were i was like that i was like that fucking monkey from playing oh

1:10:38

no oh no at least you had an airbag yeah darren was riding in the cup holders.

1:10:49

Oh shit but it was it was

1:10:52

such a good time man big ups big ups

1:10:54

to preacher 100 hope he's uh

1:10:57

having fun in his european vacation darren wants

1:11:01

to do it again like he really enjoyed

1:11:04

it dude he goes dude i miss this yeah

1:11:07

like it's comics that love violence

1:11:10

that love ufc and that's all we care about karmic

1:11:13

at the airport going back what i do he goes man we need to do this more often

1:11:20

and i go i have kids yeah no that's exactly right that's the problem this is

1:11:26

not gonna happen things have to align yeah correctly to make it happen and it did this

1:11:31

time and i hope it does again hey we just keep pulling the this is

1:11:34

my father's day gift every year every yeah

1:11:37

no but if you want to do it twice a year it's a fucking stunt

1:11:40

so i see well i mean i think right now there's no

1:11:42

more events in the states as far as like a good card hey

1:11:45

man yesterday i went to your pop pop 65th birthday

1:11:49

and i got invited to go see the raiders in vegas that's that's another thing

1:11:56

i want to go do i want to experience a raiders game yeah i really want to to

1:12:00

see a Raiders game that's that's on my bucket list for sure yeah yeah I don't

1:12:05

know if I want to bring Lisa. But I'm gonna have to it's a guy's trip bro,

1:12:10

She can go. That's what we'll do. We let the girls go do their own thing. We go to a Raiders.

1:12:16

Boom. They can go to a Sapphire or something. I don't know.

1:12:20

My girl is more of a football fan than you are.

1:12:24

Oh, that's a problem, though. It sounds like a personal problem.

1:12:28

I think Alyssa is a bigger football fan than you.

1:12:31

Probably. Yeah. I used to be a big football fan. I just fell off.

1:12:36

Yeah. Yeah, man. I used to be all about the Bucs.

1:12:40

I used to go to the games. I used to go to the games with Hoover all the time.

1:12:43

Who was your favorite Buck player?

1:12:46

Back in the day, that was with freaking Warren Sapp when he was playing.

1:12:50

Yeah. And I was doing that. Oh, dude. I saw a picture of Hoover when he was skinny.

1:12:57

Oh, yeah. Skinny Hoover? What a douchebag. Really? What do you mean?

1:13:01

He looked like a douchebag. He lost weight? He showed me the picture, and I go, I'm glad I met you like this.

1:13:11

Because this picture, this guy looks like a douchebag. Really?

1:13:15

And I wouldn't want to hang with him. No, it's fine.

1:13:18

His head stays big, so it looks weird. He's like a Funko Pop.

1:13:22

His head's big, but then his body's small. Dude, he looked so douchey. I wish he could send you the picture.

1:13:29

You can ask. Have him send you the picture. It's like his prom picture and stuff like that.

1:13:33

But then there's the picture of him now with the beard. It looks like an investor

1:13:38

at a dinosaur museum kind of deal.

1:13:42

You know what I mean? That they're trying to bring back live dinosaurs,

1:13:45

and then dinosaurs come to life and just start eating the guests,

1:13:51

and they got to lock down the island kind of thing. It does look like that. Yeah, it does.

1:13:59

Yeah, man, it was fun. It was a fun trip.

1:14:02

I coupled that into a long-ass work week and all this,

1:14:05

and that still feel like i haven't recovered from it but it was yeah

1:14:08

100 well worth it it was it was

1:14:11

fun dude got back i was so tired oh

1:14:14

yeah i was exhausted there we

1:14:18

i fell asleep on the plane on takeoff that was

1:14:22

crazy yeah i was just like oh dude on the

1:14:25

way back i i go to the front i go

1:14:28

to the guy that take it and be like hey man

1:14:31

i don't have a seat what do you

1:14:34

have of papa can you put me

1:14:37

and my my friend together and stuff like that

1:14:39

let me see what i can do i got an exit roll i can put

1:14:43

you here it's like all right yeah that's fine do you

1:14:46

have anything for him he's like no full flight all right so i'm gonna be on

1:14:51

the exit roll this one's gonna be in the back of the plane i get in i get to

1:14:57

my exit row and it's the middle fucking seat bro right Right next to a nerd

1:15:02

playing a grown man. Yeah.

1:15:05

A grown man playing the Switch like this.

1:15:09

And he didn't have any tism. This was a grown fucking.

1:15:13

Wait a second. What's the problem with that? It's a grown fucking man playing.

1:15:19

Listen, bro. Don't be that guy. What?

1:15:23

Are you playing fucking? You're a grown man. On your little Nintendo?

1:15:27

If I had the choice, I would. Like a fucking toddler? Yeah.

1:15:32

Wait a second. When are you above video games? you're all

1:15:35

about video games yeah am i home

1:15:38

not in public no all right

1:15:41

maybe on your phone if i'm the phone at

1:15:44

the phone the most whatever you do on the phone yeah so a switch as an adult

1:15:49

is not as a thing first of all playing it like this oh that's weird as an adult

1:15:55

you always play it like this or play playing cognito and shit like that not

1:15:59

like this that it looks like hey Hey,

1:16:02

look what my birthday gift.

1:16:04

I got a switch, and it has the blue and red colors.

1:16:07

I mean, I'm not. You know what I mean? Like a fucking toddler. Was he playing tennis?

1:16:11

Yeah. Yeah, what game was he playing? I don't fucking know.

1:16:14

The point is, I'm sitting there, and then the other exit row is empty.

1:16:20

So it's kind of, and then I hear, boarding complete.

1:16:26

I'm like, all right, cool. cool the fucking nerd goes

1:16:29

hey they got empty seats over there

1:16:32

you can go over there i guess your arm

1:16:35

is on top of them yeah but i'm in the middle row he's playing

1:16:37

and i go pedro you're playing the game play the game

1:16:40

this this is pedro sitting down waiting yeah

1:16:44

just like that yeah uh i mean there's a empty

1:16:47

seats yeah and i go oh no no

1:16:50

no it's not oh because you're not you can't just

1:16:53

move from your seat to this is not fucking greyhound

1:16:56

bus all right so i go yeah

1:17:00

dude i know you know i don't want to be sitting in the middle

1:17:03

fucking seat but i gotta wait for them to give me the okay so and

1:17:06

then uh the flight attendant comes by and be like hey can i do

1:17:09

and she goes thumbs up boom i get

1:17:12

the whole row to myself oh man then i

1:17:15

asked another flight attendant who's freshly from

1:17:18

fucking plastic surgery oh yeah she had duck lips this bitch got duck lid and

1:17:23

an ass an ass and a duck lip dude that's yeah and she looked like she's like

1:17:27

in her mid 40s hey man whatever you can get it uh and i asked hey can i get

1:17:34

my buddy who's sitting at 25d,

1:17:37

right next to the bathroom to sit next to me he's like ah let me find out this

1:17:42

motherfucker's asleep as i tell already so i tell him hey dude when you wake

1:17:47

up when the plane fucking the seaboat just Just come on down. You got the okay.

1:17:53

So we got that, came by, talked for a little bit. The only reason I woke up

1:17:57

is that bitch woke me up talking about plantains. I was like, huh?

1:18:01

I was like, what? Oh, yeah, plantains. And then I look and I'm like,

1:18:05

oh, shit, we're in the air. So your thing on a plane is music and sleep, yeah? Oh, yeah.

1:18:12

What did you say? Taylor Swift or Les Miserables? Taylor Swift or Les Mis. Fucking just put it on.

1:18:19

Such a dork. What is your thing? What do you mean? Like, what am I listening to?

1:18:25

I listen to the

1:18:28

zelda soundtrack the mario i watch

1:18:31

i watch and it's honestly it's actually the same movie every time

1:18:34

i watch the harder they fall how do they yeah that idris elba western okay you

1:18:41

know what i'm talking about it's the only person that's seen it you've never

1:18:43

seen is this the one from netflix yeah with uh it's idris elba and it's got

1:18:49

that other that girl His name's Jordan.

1:18:53

What the fuck is his name? God damn it. It's good, dude. Damn it. All right, real quick.

1:18:59

You ready for this, Danny? It has the black girl in it, right? Yeah, it's all black.

1:19:04

Check out. It's a black Western. I think so. Hey, Danny. So it puts you to sleep

1:19:07

because it's a black people? No, I love the movie.

1:19:10

Oh. I just watched the movie. Jesus Christ. Yeah, I'm just asking,

1:19:13

dude. Relax, dude. Trying to catch me slipping. Check out this cowboy. All right.

1:19:20

Oh you are 100 right right oh man skinny uber bro oh dude that guy definitely

1:19:27

kept his liquor bottles on the shelf like after he drank them look how cool

1:19:32

i am bro it's so skinny that doesn't even look like him no it doesn't look like

1:19:37

it's like he has like a little little brother, that's who his little brother that's what it looks like that's crazy and it's

1:19:44

bananas bananas. That's crazy.

1:19:47

I told him. Jonathan. Jonathan Majors. That's the guy. Ah, yes,

1:19:50

yes, yes, yes. And it also has the guy from...

1:19:53

Atlanta, who's also been in Get Out when he goes, Get Out.

1:20:02

Skinny guy. Who are you talking about? Stankfield. Oh, Stanfield. Stanfield.

1:20:08

Lakeith. Lakeith Stanfield. Great actor, dude. He's so good.

1:20:11

That whole movie's good. If you haven't watched it, you should definitely watch it. I've seen it.

1:20:14

I've seen it. If I'm going to watch a movie, it has to be, I was so upset when

1:20:19

I went on the JetBlue blue TV and they didn't have Les Mis.

1:20:23

I'm like, fuck, they took it out. My thing is like Netflix will let you download

1:20:27

a movie and that's one of the ones that I've downloaded.

1:20:29

So I can watch it without hooking up to Wi-Fi or anything like that.

1:20:32

You didn't know that? No. But every time I go to get on a plane, I go, fuck, I should have downloaded a movie.

1:20:37

So I watch the same one over and over again. And now I've watched it so many

1:20:40

times that I just like watching it on the plane. HBO does it too, where you can download a movie or even a series.

1:20:45

Oh, right? Mm-hmm. I'm going to fucking have to do that then. Yeah.

1:20:50

Yep. That's how I was watching Game of Thrones back in the day.

1:20:52

Well, I'm ready for the next one. You guys just let me know.

1:20:55

Send out the bat signal. You guys just let me know when the next one is,

1:20:58

and I'm ready. As long as Preacher will have me, I'll be back for sure. Yeah.

1:21:03

Yeah. And I don't think I did anything to ruin my shot at getting a re-invite if one were to show up.

1:21:09

Yeah, what did you do? Did you leave any cups around? I didn't.

1:21:14

They didn't have no clean up the kumsy charges on the Airbnb or anything like

1:21:18

that. I was waiting for Preacher to be like, so, what do you think about my special?

1:21:21

Be like, I guess this is the only time I'm going to hang out with you, buddy.

1:21:27

Because you're not going to like my answer. That was fun. Did you watch it? All right, I'll see my way out.

1:21:38

Let me call my cousin. I guess I'm going to be staying with them before the plane leaves. Yeah.

1:21:43

I do need to get out of here, though. All right, cool. Oh, that's right.

1:21:46

Saying you got yeah and we're at an hour and a half almost guys this

1:21:50

was a full episode recap of our vacation so sorry

1:21:53

we'll touch on all the internet

1:21:56

whatnot so next week is gonna be so

1:21:58

much is it next week father's day yeah are you gonna

1:22:01

try and edit this what are you just gonna slap

1:22:04

happy and just put it up and i've been

1:22:07

editing them 40 minutes have you i edited the last one yeah but not right what

1:22:13

do you mean because that's how we found out yeah you missed well that wasn't

1:22:16

my fault that was that was a loadout file that was your fault no i mean sure

1:22:20

i'm not buying it all right but no i've been editing them editing them editing them okay.

1:22:27

I'll take out all the quiet parts like this and take out the fact that you said

1:22:31

something. I don't like that you take the quiet parts out.

1:22:33

Why? Because I like the quiet parts. The dead space?

1:22:35

Yeah. No. Yes. Yeah. Four. Because

1:22:38

just because your brain doesn't have thoughts during the dead space.

1:22:41

I like it. Somebody who says like that. You're like Furiosa in Mad Max.

1:22:47

You have like nine lines in the whole podcast and you're like nine lines and

1:22:53

you're like, oh, I don't like the quiet spots.

1:22:55

It's like yeah fucking talk more what

1:22:59

are you talking about i talk enough i talk enough

1:23:02

yeah film film like quiet spots and film them yeah be a cock cock what does

1:23:09

that mean i like the quiet you know what a cock gun is oh caulk good seal it

1:23:14

all that's how you said caulk and caulk i called you two things okay see clever yeah yeah is it comedy.

1:23:25

Are we gonna record next week uh oh

1:23:29

yeah what's next what's happening is your daughter taking scuba lessons

1:23:32

is she parasailing in fucking

1:23:35

barbados for her one year and three weeks birthday oh sorry guys you don't get

1:23:41

an episode this week the baby was learning sign language yeah oh she is learning

1:23:45

sign language is she good baby can't even say data is fucking gonna do this shit. Give me a break.

1:23:55

Give me a fucking break, dude. Give me a break. Can you guys just parent like normal people?

1:24:03

Stop being extra. Stop being extra. Oh, man. And teach. Oh, we're gonna teach

1:24:08

you how to fucking crochet. A fucking thing doesn't know how to hold a pencil. You want it to fucking be able to make a quilt.

1:24:16

People with one kid. It's just so fucking. So fucking.

1:24:19

Yeah, can you hurry up and have the second one and fucking be done?

1:24:22

What am I doing wrong? Not getting a second baby. Not getting a second baby.

1:24:27

Fucking popper. That was second one in there, dude. Yeah. So you could be a

1:24:30

normal parent. Yeah. What's a normal parent? Yeah, what's a normal parent? You're looking at it. Yeah. What's that?

1:24:36

Right here. Whatever this is. Anger.

1:24:38

Anger and stress. Stress. Yeah. Wearing a Hawaiian shirt randomly.

1:24:42

Yeah. Because that's what you got. Yeah. Coughing up five grand for braces.

1:24:47

Fools. Yeah, man. Get ready. i know i like he was asking like wow in a panic

1:24:52

thing in a panic like he has to put braces on the one-year-old the page was

1:24:58

like literally all of my children had braces yeah i was wondering i was curious

1:25:02

just a thing they all get them now no because i picture you sending that this is.

1:25:07

How much did you pay for them braces, Danny? I got to do that.

1:25:12

You know what I mean? And then you're sort of. Yeah. Is that what you think I do? Yeah.

1:25:17

You think I do an evil laugh after I find out the cost? You're just laughing

1:25:21

because you still have a fucking toy budget that hasn't been tapped.

1:25:26

And you don't realize once you have kids, that toy budget is gone.

1:25:31

Yeah. I think the next toy budget is going to be the NCAA fucking football game.

1:25:36

Yeah. It's going to be the next purchase.

1:25:39

Yeah. Are you guys going to do it live? What? Live? No, no, no. The video game. Oh, the video game. Oh,

1:25:46

I thought you meant like you're going to do it like a live game. I would go.

1:25:49

I would love to go. It's that super expensive.

1:25:52

For like three-hour experience, it's mad expensive.

1:25:56

Really? Yeah. College games are expensive, huh? Yeah. Well, not good college games.

1:26:02

I would not expect that. i would expect it just to be like you

1:26:05

know you know you wouldn't under a hundred that's why that's

1:26:08

why it's college but whatever you you're surprised by everything still which

1:26:12

is what's funny you have you have childlike wonderment yeah how about childlike

1:26:17

wonderment it's just it's college game it's not the real thing yeah oh braces cost wow wow wow man man,

1:26:27

you pay how much for school you

1:26:31

pay for school have you taken your kids to charter school I

1:26:34

don't fucking my kids are going through fucking public school

1:26:37

100% fucking they're learning about

1:26:40

your kids in public school yeah your kids are in public school first of all

1:26:42

don't point your finger like that your kids are in public school very threatening

1:26:46

and I almost got up and slapped you out of instinct Zane is gonna be private

1:26:51

school right oh yeah 100 yeah I already got the end I pick up from the schools

1:26:56

Have another one or two kids and tell me if they're going to private school or not. No.

1:27:00

Yeah, well. Kid's not going to learn about black history.

1:27:03

He's going to be looking at his grandmother like, what happened to grandma?

1:27:08

What fire took grandma out? Oh, my gosh. You know?

1:27:13

Fucking please, teach that kid whatever you didn't learn in school.

1:27:17

I trust that Jenny is going to do the right thing. Divorce? I mean, oh.

1:27:23

Leave. Do the right thing. Leave me.

1:27:28

Leave her. I don't want to hear this.

1:27:34

All right, guys. This is episode 163. As always, check us out.

1:27:39

And he said he's prepping for this birthday party with another Nicotine Pack.

1:27:43

I'm ready to go. All right, guys. See you later. Peace.