When you grow up in a world where gay is a synonym for bad, and men who show a feminine attribute are mocked, it’s easy to unwittingly internalise these feelings.

Meet James Finn. He’s a novelist, columnist and LGBT activist living in the US and making change through his writing, mentoring and activism.

James grew up the son of a preacher in a conservative community in the US. By the age of 10 or 11 he knew he was different. His local church had just embarked on an anti-gay campaign and one Sunday, as James was sitting listening to the sermon, he realised the minister was talking about people who felt like him, like his particular form of different. A terrifying and isolating experience that James now sees led to psychological damage.

James has collected some fascinating life experiences and stories. He worked as a machine gunner in the Marine Corps and for the intelligence division of the Air Force in Berlin during the Cold War. He also worked in the sex trade, selling himself in the bars of New York, which he recently wrote about publicly for the first time.

His years supporting those suffering with HIV and AIDS through the height of the epidemic shaped his life in a way that can’t be overstated. His activism started here; and now extends to many other issues and stigmas affecting LGBT communities around the world.

We talked about James’ youth, coming out, writing, activism, time in the military and perspectives on the sex trade, plus internalised homophobia and the shame this can spark internally. We also get into what is happening with LGBTQ rights in the US and around the world, which issues need more support and more political will.

Show James a big dose of love on social if you enjoy our conversation and why not share it in a tweet or story with those in your community.