Episode Transcript
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0:00
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hot grill summer at Whole Foods Market. What's
0:39
up heroes? Welcome back to another
0:41
episode and a brand new series on
0:43
OneShot. I'm your host, GM Dillion, and
0:45
I'm absolutely delighted to bring you this
0:47
new cast and game. Because
0:50
starting this week we're playing
0:52
Bloodbeam Badlands, a game of
0:54
gunslinging vampires in the unsetting
0:56
apocalypse. It's vampires in
0:58
a world plagued by toxic,
1:00
never-setting sun and I'm obsessed
1:03
with its vibe. Vidica
1:05
Valetti, the game designer and my friend,
1:07
joined us for this series and we
1:09
had just playtested some of the rules
1:11
that were still being finalized for the upcoming
1:14
final version of this game. So you'll
1:16
notice that we do a few rule
1:18
check-ins while playing and there will be a
1:20
final version of this game coming out
1:22
soon. I will keep you posted on that.
1:25
When Vidica first described this game to me, he
1:28
mentioned Mad Max Fury Road and
1:30
the Night Market from Hellboy. So
1:33
that is the vibe that I ran with
1:35
for this series. Now I'm
1:37
very excited to say let's get into
1:39
the shadows and meet some
1:41
vampires. Oh
1:58
goodness! Hi, welcome
2:01
to One Shot, the podcast
2:03
that studio that you've all
2:05
been driven to a very
2:07
real place in space and
2:09
time, where I have invited
2:11
you to come play some
2:13
games. I
2:16
am Dylan and I am your host and
2:18
game master. The people listening to this show
2:20
already know who I am because I killed
2:23
James DeMato several
2:26
months ago and took his job.
2:30
I'm being joined by
2:32
some absolutely amazing people
2:36
this month on One Shot
2:39
to play a brand new game as the
2:41
show goes. I would like them to introduce
2:43
themselves to you so that you know who
2:45
they are and how absolutely amazing they are.
2:48
I would like Laura, would you go first
2:50
and tell everybody where they could
2:52
find you, what kind of things you do
2:54
and just brag about yourself,
2:56
please? Absolutely. Hi, you can
2:59
call me Laura or Tutu or Laura Tutu, my
3:01
pronouns are she, they. I'm all
3:03
over the Internet, usually in some iteration of
3:05
Laura underscore Tutu. You might just have to
3:07
throw an underscore at the beginning and the
3:09
end of that, depending on where you're looking
3:11
for me, because well, somebody else took the
3:14
damn handle. That was the easiest. There
3:16
they are. I
3:20
aggressively play
3:23
TTRPGs in vampire
3:25
form a lot. So like
3:27
Vampire the Masquerade and basically
3:31
anything else that has a bloodsucker
3:33
archetype handed to me, I will
3:35
roll dice and I'll be happy. Usually
3:38
with the fine folks over at Queens Court Games, when
3:40
I'm not at Queens Court Games, you can find me
3:42
with Obsidian Brews, the all black tabletop collective. Amazing,
3:45
thank you so much. And
3:47
Laura, I have an icebreaker question for
3:50
you that is related to the game
3:52
that we're about to play. Shoot. And
3:54
that question is, if you had to
3:56
choose between day forever and night forever,
3:59
which would you? choose and why. Night
4:01
forever. Without question, I
4:03
hate being sweaty and it is sweaty
4:05
and hot in the sun. Screw that. Yeah.
4:08
Wait, do you want to swear? Yes,
4:12
yes, yes. Fuck that. Then fuck
4:14
that. I have not. Fuck
4:16
that. Very
4:19
good. But
4:22
do you, my love, would you
4:24
please introduce yourself? How amazing and
4:26
cool you are and answer that
4:29
same very question. Of course. Hey,
4:31
everyone. I'm Vaditya Valetti. I
4:33
am my pronouns are he him. I'm
4:36
an interactive artist, game designer
4:38
and educator. I
4:41
make games. That's all I do. That's all
4:43
I love doing. You
4:47
can find me online at Vaditya
4:49
Valetti because I have very
4:51
good SEO. And
4:56
and you can find my games at
4:58
Vaditya Valetti.h.io like
5:02
the one that we're playing today
5:04
and other ones like Long Sword,
5:07
Space Goblins, Space Between
5:09
Stars. I don't know. I got
5:11
a I got a wide range of them. Absolutely.
5:14
And day forever or
5:16
night forever. So I. You
5:20
know, it's like one of those things where you're like for
5:23
several years, like so many years in my life,
5:25
I'm like, oh, I'm like a night person. I'm
5:27
like a late night. I stay up late. I
5:29
sleep in. I don't like the morning. Yeah,
5:32
I realize that that's probably
5:35
because of depression. Mornings
5:38
are actually pretty great.
5:42
I was like, I was like, what the
5:44
fuck if I wake up in the morning,
5:46
like and the first first thing I get
5:48
is like beautiful morning sunshine in my face,
5:50
like things are good
5:52
and nice. Are you going to
5:54
tell me that walking actually is good for
5:57
my mental health? Because I really don't want to
5:59
hear. I know. who's
10:02
with us here today and is
10:04
a game about vampires a
10:07
little bit different than a lot of the vampire
10:09
games that we are more
10:11
well known in the tabletop
10:13
space. But right here,
10:15
Laura is someone I
10:18
just instantly think of any time that
10:20
I think of vampires. And
10:23
just because I
10:25
love your portrayal of
10:27
vampires and also one of your
10:29
biggest projects that I am enamored
10:32
with is your project on
10:34
Queensport Gaming. And Josephine,
10:36
you also are someone that I
10:39
think of when I think vampires.
10:42
I am so happy. I
10:44
have so many gifts of you about to bite someone. There
10:51
are so many. Good,
10:56
good, good, good. Yeah, that's great. Working
11:00
as intended, actually. Yeah,
11:02
and Vidalia is actually
11:04
a vampire. There,
11:08
I don't know if you, the audience
11:10
of this podcast can't see him, but
11:12
he is the most vampire looking dude
11:14
I've ever seen. You
11:16
do look like you were frozen
11:18
in time. I'm giving
11:20
Armand. Yeah,
11:23
he's giving Armand. I'm like, am I
11:25
going to be a weirdo? Josephine,
11:29
I'll do it for you. Thank you. Thank
11:32
you. I
11:35
will. That is an incredible government, yeah. You
11:39
did just text me the other day
11:41
a picture of like some old, old
11:43
painting in a museum that looked exactly
11:46
like you. If
11:48
you go to the Metropolitan Museum of
11:50
Art in New York City, right, and
11:52
you go to the Egyptian section, like
11:55
you walk into the entrance of the
11:57
Egyptian section, you make a left. There
11:59
is a series of few. Funeral portraits,
12:01
this is like a quest I'm giving
12:03
somebody. Do this. If you're listening to
12:06
this and you go to the Met,
12:08
take a selfie with my funeral portrait,
12:10
Jeff Stormer. There's
12:14
Roman era Egyptian funeral portraits
12:17
and one of them looks exactly like me.
12:19
It's uncanny, it's ridiculous. It's proof that
12:21
I think- Are you going to get in
12:23
trouble for outing yourself like this? I think that's a
12:26
mass grade, Rachel, I did. I
12:30
don't think anybody's going to listen to this.
12:35
That's fine. No
12:39
worries. I
12:43
spot it. When
12:49
this comes out, if I've mysteriously disappeared, this
12:51
is what- Well, no. Yeah.
12:54
We're going to blame it on Jeff Stormer. It's fine. So
12:57
we had started to
12:59
build our characters. This game,
13:01
Bloodbeam Badlands, is a game
13:03
about vampires in a apocalypse
13:06
wherein the sun is both
13:08
toxic and never setting. So
13:11
the vampires that exist in this world are
13:14
a little bit wrong and
13:17
have these very special and unique
13:20
types of abilities that they have.
13:23
Vidya, can you tell me the type
13:25
of vampire you are and just a
13:27
couple of little facts about you and
13:29
your vampire? Yeah.
13:33
So my vampire is a phantom
13:36
blood. That means that they
13:39
kind of house ghosts in their
13:41
heart and they have a cool
13:43
thing called a phantasm, which is
13:46
like a ghost that
13:48
they can summon and kind
13:50
of does cool things
13:55
for them. And
13:57
I think like my vampire- only
14:00
knows the apocalypse. I think
14:03
they turned afterwards.
14:06
I'm leaning into a gunslingery
14:08
vampire thing. They look
14:11
like a cool outlaw cowboy. Sick.
14:18
You said that they
14:20
are like a gunslingery
14:22
vibe. I'm picturing a
14:24
pretty standard cowboy. How
14:26
does your cowboy vampire
14:28
protect himself from the
14:30
sun? I
14:32
want to go just
14:34
classic big brimmed hat.
14:38
Oh, hell yeah. Really big.
14:40
Really big. Really big.
14:43
Really big hat. I
14:46
think there's bullet holes in it. Which
14:50
is kind of like some like
14:52
kind of goes through, but it's
14:54
cool. It's aesthetically cool. Yeah, it's
14:56
placed just so that the
14:58
light that comes in just
15:01
misses me. Just misses me. Yeah,
15:03
perfect. I don't think there's also a
15:05
big star on the side of it.
15:08
Oh, I don't know if he was the sheriff at some point.
15:12
Like self-appointed. Yeah. Yeah.
15:17
That's it. I'm picturing
15:19
like stars as like
15:22
an aesthetic. I got,
15:24
you know, Spurs that jingle
15:26
jangle jingle. Nice. I'm
15:29
imagining like glitter stars at this point,
15:31
but this is great. We could
15:33
do glitter stars, you know? Love
15:35
glitter stars. I'm not opposed to a glitter
15:37
star or two. Laura,
15:41
can you tell me what kind of
15:43
vampire you are? A little bit about
15:45
this vampire. Some of the things that
15:47
they can do. What
15:51
they look like. So I
15:53
have taken the Umbral shift
15:56
vampire, which means that
15:58
they are attuned to the demiplane of. which
16:00
is also known as the Deep Umbra,
16:02
which is just too
16:05
cool to not go
16:07
with. Oh
16:09
my God, oh my God. I didn't
16:11
read the entire titling on this. So
16:14
connected to the Deep Umbra, your soul
16:17
is an unstable void connecting you to
16:19
it. Because of this
16:21
attachment, you do not cast a shadow.
16:25
Yeah, yeah. So that's baller.
16:28
But yeah, I'm thinking like we're going
16:31
for the vibe of
16:37
Mily Jovovich and I think it
16:39
was like the third, oh
16:43
God, what's the damn movie? The
16:46
zombie movies that never die. There's
16:48
on like number eight right now. Resident Evil, that's
16:50
it. Resident Evil, yay.
16:53
With the like cowl
16:55
and hood and like fully,
16:58
clothed to survive the wasted
17:00
desert of Las Vegas. Amazing,
17:06
beautiful. Love that, love that.
17:09
Do you have a name
17:11
in mind? I
17:13
do, I'm thinking of
17:15
Jude Wyatt. Love
17:18
Jude Wyatt, oh that's a great
17:20
name. Pronouns? Pronouns
17:22
would be they them. And
17:25
as far as their age, don't worry about it. Great,
17:30
love that. Don't
17:32
worry about it, it's fine, I'm sure it's fine. Yeah,
17:34
no, apparently I can throw things in and out of
17:36
the shadow realm. So that's gonna be fun to screw
17:38
with. I'm sure that won't have
17:40
any consequences down the line. No, not
17:43
at all. I'm sure this is the same
17:45
thing. And then how are you protecting yourself
17:47
from the sun, the ever present toxic sun?
17:52
Yeah, I think like I said, it's very much like
17:55
someone who is used to wandering
17:57
more of a desert climate. me
17:59
a lot of linen and cotton
18:03
and a cowl and
18:05
a hood combo that basically keeps
18:07
everything but the eyes covered. Yeah.
18:10
Mm-hmm. Cool. Yeah,
18:12
yeah, yeah. Awesome. Love
18:14
that. Josephine, can you tell us a little bit
18:17
about your vampire? Yes.
18:20
I'm playing a haemoturge. I'm just
18:23
going to read the little blurb that's under it. It
18:26
was for you, everything changed when you
18:28
were inflicted with the vampiric curse. Your
18:30
blood became a potent arcane
18:33
conduit allowing you greater magical
18:35
heights unheard of before. I
18:37
just want to like anyone that is over here
18:39
because of LA by night, I know that I've
18:41
played a blood witch for
18:44
a long time. This is nothing
18:46
like her. It's different. It's different.
18:48
It's totally different. It's different blood magic. That
18:51
is not why I chose it. So
18:54
I have a spell book that contains
18:56
arcane secrets. My grimoire
18:58
has the Aegis spell domain,
19:01
which is a domain of
19:03
protection. My
19:05
incantations are shield, mend,
19:07
and inspire. My
19:10
name is just
19:14
Doc. Doc
19:17
and the she they pronouns. They're
19:20
going to be 224. I've
19:23
amended this. 294 years old. Basically,
19:26
they just got through medical school. The
19:29
apocalypse. The apocalypse happened.
19:34
That's even worse. At
19:39
least you don't have to pay off the student loan
19:41
debt. Yeah, exactly. Oh, there
19:43
you go. Loan forgiveness. There
19:45
you go. Yeah, the apocalypse is loan
19:47
forgiveness. You heard it here. They
19:52
look like a Celine bartender, a white.
20:00
button up that's rolled up over
20:03
rippling muscles and suspenders
20:06
and has tattoos and
20:08
scars all over their
20:10
arms. Just very worn
20:12
and gruff. The
20:14
same with the shirt has old
20:17
blood stains and dirt and nothing is
20:19
clean. Skin is grayish
20:21
in pallor. I don't know why. It's
20:24
just that's just what it is.
20:28
And let's say red
20:31
eyes, I don't know, blood magic. And
20:34
some very, we're
20:36
going to say like pale
20:38
long hair, but it's never down. It's always
20:40
like braided up and out of the way. But
20:44
yeah, strong and very tall, like burly.
20:49
Yeah. Hell yeah. How
20:52
is she protecting herself
20:54
from the sun? I
20:57
think this is so not
20:59
cool. You guys are very cool. I
21:02
think that she has this really
21:04
large bag that she travels with
21:06
and it has a big awning
21:08
that protrudes above
21:10
and over. I
21:13
love that. Just kind of always this
21:15
little. And I feel like it can almost
21:17
extend into a little tent situation to
21:19
do a little triage and treatment of people
21:22
on the go. Oh,
21:24
cool. That's fun. I like that.
21:27
Vadiea Valedi, tell me your
21:30
vampire's name. I can't. Violence
21:36
immediately. This
21:39
is an audio medium. I pointed my fingers
21:41
at him like a gun. Yes, it was
21:44
terrifying. Very
21:46
apt, actually. I'm going to name my vampire.
21:49
Gun. Bang. Bang.
21:53
Bang. OK. So
21:55
not much different. Not much different at all.
21:57
I don't think I'm doing like she. She
22:00
pronouns. He, yeah.
22:02
Love that so much. Do
22:05
you have an age or age
22:07
range in mind? Younger.
22:10
So like. Young ish. Yeah. Yeah.
22:12
Okay. Perfect. Love
22:15
that. So big. So big.
22:18
I think it's like. I love it. Younger.
22:21
We have exactly 224 years old. We
22:24
have age, don't worry about it and
22:27
young kind of. Those
22:29
are where we are at in the
22:31
time spectrum. Like
22:36
younger than what? Exactly.
22:41
I just younger than you. I'll be like I'm younger than you.
22:44
That's what the adventure is going to be
22:46
is figure out how. I'm age. Is
22:49
the youngest. Do
22:52
you, I would like
22:54
to imagine that you all at least
22:57
know each other. Somehow you
22:59
don't have to be best friends. You don't have to
23:01
be super super close, but I would
23:03
like everybody to know of at least each other
23:05
or know each other in some way. So
23:09
if anybody has any ideas that
23:12
are sparking forward, otherwise, I'll try
23:14
to try to tie
23:16
some lines. I'm like
23:18
99.9% sure
23:21
that Jude would have tried to pick someone's pocket at
23:23
some point. They've got
23:25
sticky sticky fingers. Yeah.
23:28
What's our society status of this wasteland?
23:36
Are there little pockets of societies?
23:38
Oh. Sorry.
23:41
That was the weirdest way for me
23:44
to ask. No, no, no. That's a
23:46
good question. So there is society. It
23:49
is it's very much
23:51
like outlaws
23:54
and I think
23:56
there is like the wasteland where things
23:58
are a little more. times
26:00
dude stop
26:02
doing it you know like or
26:05
be better stop letting me like
26:07
when you get away with it
26:09
i'll be happy but you keep
26:11
getting caught and that's what
26:13
pisses me off do you think i like stepped
26:15
into like mediate for
26:18
sure yeah yeah 100 i think you know we can even just
26:20
i think i shot jude
26:25
and you picture up
26:28
yeah yeah there
26:32
it is there it is
26:34
okay so jude pickpocketed bang
26:37
bang shot jude and then
26:39
they both hobbled over to
26:41
duck who patched
26:44
up jude yeah
26:46
we we gotta work together to
26:48
survive in this place you know it's like can't
26:51
be doing this shit i
26:53
know what do you keep trying
26:55
to steal i feel like
26:58
you've stolen something from you've attempted
27:00
to steal from bang twice at
27:03
least what is the thing you're
27:05
trying to steal i don't know if
27:07
it's anything in particular is the thing
27:09
it's definitely like a compulsion like
27:11
just because i can like
27:14
most of the time stealing for profit
27:16
and or because i'm getting like kind
27:19
of a treasure hunter vibe like wants
27:21
to find the greatest treasure that is
27:23
left in these horrid wastes and sometimes
27:26
i get bored and take
27:28
shit they're trying to steal a sense
27:30
of purpose that's
27:34
that's that's the character there it is
27:37
there it is that's it
27:39
stealing a sense of purpose
27:42
is amazing um
27:46
okay so we all we all know each
27:48
other we've got a little bit of a
27:50
backstory oh i think
27:52
that my costs for my services are usually
27:55
like these sort of like moral
27:57
challenges where i'm like you all have to
28:00
You all need to work together. I
28:02
won't treat you unless you show
28:04
me that you can work together
28:06
and help us survive because we
28:08
are already limited in our. Have
28:11
we already had a small adventure together?
28:14
Where it's like, you have to work together. It's like
28:16
a bar fight kind of broke
28:18
out and
28:20
you're like, I won't patch you up until
28:22
you help these poor folks or something, right?
28:25
That just happened to have a job for
28:27
me. Yeah. Yeah.
28:31
Awesome. Awesome. All
28:34
right. I think.
28:38
I think we're ready to go to the wasteland.
28:41
Let's do it. Let's
28:43
do it. Let's do it. You
28:45
have survived the apocalypse and
28:48
your worst nightmare has come true. The
28:51
sun burns redder, brighter and
28:53
hotter, never setting the forever
28:56
dawn. The land
28:58
has been irradiated and kissed by
29:00
its strange sanguine rays, warping the
29:02
world into a carnival for the
29:05
strange and the supernatural. Today
29:08
is the
29:11
day of a more literal carnival.
29:14
Usually that is a
29:17
convenient terminology we use
29:19
to describe this hell
29:21
we now reside within.
29:25
But we do find some
29:27
moments for fun and
29:30
in our own new way tonight,
29:33
today, as it is always day,
29:36
is the dark carnival. You
29:39
would be there because who wouldn't be? It
29:44
is a spectacular
29:47
and sensational event where all
29:50
of the supernatural creatures from
29:52
near and far
29:55
travel to see old
29:58
friends to play a weird. games
30:00
and to find
30:03
out new news,
30:06
gossip, things that
30:08
may benefit us
30:10
here in the wasteland once
30:12
the carnival itself is over.
30:16
Inside, or actually I should say
30:18
from just outside of where the
30:20
dark carnival is propped
30:22
up, there are
30:26
these sort of tattered
30:30
sheets that are levitating
30:32
magically in the sky
30:35
above where the carnival takes
30:38
place and from the outside
30:40
where it is glaringly, horrifically
30:42
day. Once
30:46
you peer inside,
30:48
there is inexplicable
30:50
darkness. You
30:53
would know that this darkness is
30:55
simply a magical illusion meant
30:57
to mimic the night. It
30:59
will not protect you. So
31:02
you must not let your guard
31:04
down and forget that the sun's
31:06
rays really are still here. But
31:10
for the sake of pretend, you
31:12
get to have one
31:14
evening of night. It's
31:27
a mid-roll gang. I have some new things
31:29
that I would like to share with you.
31:32
This first one is a bit of an
31:34
impulsive one, but if there are any Dragon
31:36
Age fans in the studio tonight, my best
31:38
friend Robin and I are playing through the
31:40
trilogy and discussing it book club style on
31:43
our new podcast Dorkspawn aiming to finish the
31:45
series before Vale Guard comes out, which is
31:48
allegedly in the fall sometime? I
31:50
don't know. Also in
31:52
other big news, I have a new
31:54
game coming to Kickstarter that I have
31:56
created with Megan Cross called Hunt. A
31:59
fast-paced game. paced game for two players about
32:01
what it means to be a monster.
32:03
The Kickstarter page is open for you
32:06
to save right now, but the campaign
32:08
is launching on July 15th. Now
32:10
let's hear some ads and get back to
32:12
the wasteland. Host
32:14
the ultimate backyard barbecue with Whole
32:16
Foods Market. It's the hot grill
32:18
summer event through July 16th with
32:21
sizzling sales on no antibiotics ever,
32:23
boneless beef ribeye steak and beef
32:25
New York strip steak. Plus check
32:27
out sales on sustainable wild cod
32:29
Alaska sockeye salmon, organic strawberries and
32:31
more. In a hurry, choose grab
32:33
and go favorites like picnic salads
32:36
and sushi, plus plenty of cooler
32:38
friendly beverages. Make it a hot
32:40
grill summer at Whole Foods Market.
32:52
Stepping inside the dark carnival,
32:55
some of the things that
32:57
you see, you see a
32:59
big display, a big metal
33:01
case. It's like one of
33:03
those old world fortune
33:05
telling machines where you would put a
33:07
quarter in and get like a pre-written
33:09
piece of paper, except
33:12
inside of it, there
33:14
is a slightly humanoid
33:16
bat that is slamming
33:18
on the inside of the glass
33:22
angrily until someone comes along
33:25
and puts in a quarter
33:27
and you see the bat
33:29
grab a piece of paper
33:31
and angrily scribble something down
33:33
and then flies up out
33:35
of the cage and throws
33:38
it at them. It goes
33:40
back inside and continues to
33:42
slip them on the glass,
33:44
beckoning more customers over to
33:46
get their fortune read. I
33:49
was like, did you say humanoid looking
33:52
bat? Yeah, it's got
33:54
bat wings, but tiny human
33:56
body, like an angry old.
34:00
It's a very angry pixie is
34:02
what I'm picturing. It's a very
34:04
angry pixie for sure. Incredible.
34:08
Thank you so much. I
34:10
love it. I
34:12
love it. I love
34:14
it. I love it. I
34:18
love it. I love it. I
34:22
love it. I
34:24
love it. I love
34:26
it. I love it. I
34:30
would like everyone to just say
34:34
something that you see at this market. Could
34:37
be something about the decor in here.
34:39
Could be something about a
34:41
person walking around or a display or
34:43
something. Anything that comes to your
34:45
mind. There's like a, how
34:47
about, this is so stupid.
34:50
There's like a stall that's
34:52
like, it just says
34:54
like, remember your roots. And
34:57
inside there's like little
35:00
footholds where you can just hang
35:02
upside down from and
35:05
just spend time in
35:09
like a sort of cave
35:11
like setting. And there's like little
35:14
fruits as well, like for you to
35:17
nibble on. This
35:20
makes zero sense. I can't explain it. This
35:23
is for bat people. This
35:25
is for not just vampires,
35:28
but anybody who is a
35:30
bat descended monster. Yeah.
35:34
I mean, we clearly know some of them already work here. So
35:37
clearly. I want
35:39
there to be a family essentially that runs this carnival.
35:42
This is a family run joint. Yeah.
35:45
And so everyone can feel what it's like to
35:47
be a little more bat like for a bit.
35:51
Yeah. I like that. It's
35:53
called remember your roots. I think that
35:55
the bat folk that run
35:58
the dark carnival have forgotten. that
36:00
some people aren't bats. And
36:03
they're just like, this is what everyone needs.
36:06
Is they need to hang upside down and chew
36:08
on some fruit. Yeah. I
36:12
know what bats do clearly. We
36:17
all do. This
36:20
podcast is scientific for
36:22
sure. It is completely.
36:24
Some reputable stars. I
36:27
love that. I wish I could
36:29
see videos of bats hanging upside down eating fruit,
36:31
but they definitely don't do that, do they? We're
36:35
in real world. They do. They
36:37
for sure at least do both of those things. And
36:42
I think, you know, we're
36:44
on limited time here. Yeah, there
36:46
we go. You got
36:49
to do it at the same time in this world.
36:55
I'm picturing like there's definitely
36:57
a section of this carnival
36:59
that's just like Barker's Row.
37:02
So just like stall after stall after
37:04
stall after stall. And some people
37:06
are like hawking whatever
37:08
food they can ground together in these arid wastes.
37:12
And then people are like selling
37:14
crap that obviously doesn't belong to
37:16
them. Oh, for sure. And then like
37:19
everything from like defunct car
37:21
parts to like weird
37:24
scraps together clothing, just like
37:26
everything you could possibly want in the middle of
37:28
this God's forsaken irradiated place.
37:30
Yeah. Yeah,
37:34
absolutely. I
37:37
want a roller coaster. Yeah,
37:39
I think there's I want like
37:42
carnival games. We're
37:45
not like not just the boots, but like
37:48
there's a like a tilt a whirl or
37:50
something. Yeah, a roller
37:53
coaster. And a tilt a
37:55
whirl and a roller coaster for sure. I
37:57
think I think it would be really funny in. in
38:00
the in the post
38:03
apocalypse that we've created here for there to
38:05
be one of those centrifugal
38:07
force rides where you just
38:10
like because I feel like
38:13
all the people in those as you're
38:15
spinning around always make the worst facial
38:17
expressions. And I'm just picturing like like
38:19
a werewolf with like his like cheeks
38:22
laughing in the wind and like.
38:27
Yeah. And then the roller
38:29
coaster in particular, I
38:32
want to I want to say that we got to
38:34
it can't just be a regular roller coaster. It can't
38:36
just be a regular coaster. Yeah, something's got to
38:39
be weird about it. Oh, yeah.
38:41
Oh, for sure. So what
38:43
if it is a roller coaster that's
38:46
called like heaven and hell
38:48
and it just goes like
38:50
up into the stratosphere and
38:52
then all the way down below the crust of the
38:54
earth and like it's
38:57
into like and like just skirts over
38:59
like a little bit of lava. And
39:01
yeah, like just on the edge of
39:04
where you would die. Yeah,
39:06
actually there. Yeah. Yeah, it
39:09
only runs once this whole
39:11
evening because it takes so
39:13
long. Yeah, right. It's
39:17
got to be really difficult to get a ticket
39:19
to it's like yeah, yeah,
39:22
highly coveted. It's like getting on
39:24
the Titanic. It's so are
39:27
you maybe invited? Oh,
39:29
I like that. Yeah, it's like really
39:31
it's it's special to be on
39:33
that roller coaster. When you win a ride, you
39:39
get invited. You know,
39:41
yeah, I will
39:43
say none of you were
39:46
privileged enough to get a
39:48
ticket to the heaven and
39:51
hell roller coaster. That's funny.
39:53
Yeah, I'm unhappy about it. But
39:55
yeah, yeah, of course. I
39:57
did put my name on watery, but it's funny. Oh,
40:00
with the lottery. Well, that could be like seven years
40:02
from now. Who knows? You
40:07
do, however, know
40:09
that there are probably people here who have
40:12
tickets who are just walking around or
40:15
could be swindled out of them somehow.
40:19
That's definitely true. What? One
40:25
other booth that you know is always
40:27
here is
40:30
that the person responsible for
40:32
this delightful, nighttime
40:34
illusion, a very powerful
40:37
witch called She. And
40:40
she has a booth here
40:43
somewhere in the center of
40:46
the carnival itself. You
40:49
would know of her. Her attention
40:51
is very coveted because she often
40:53
has, what
40:56
a lot of people come here for is news
40:59
that might make this life on the
41:01
apocalypse a little bit better or more
41:03
fun or easier. You
41:06
can find out things here like
41:08
about trains with coveted items
41:11
coming through town or gangs
41:14
that are supposed to be rolling
41:17
through that might be intercepted. Things
41:19
like that that you can always hear
41:21
rumors about here at the
41:24
dark carnival. Can I
41:26
ask? So we've got
41:28
other supernatural beings here. What's
41:31
the human situation? There
41:36
are very few humans here
41:38
who are not human plus. And
41:45
I think that if you do see them,
41:48
like you might watch
41:50
out because they're sort of like angler fish.
41:52
Like if there's a human that is not
41:54
like a... supernatural
42:00
thing like it's either
42:03
not yet and it's about to
42:05
be or
42:09
or it's a trap. So I would say
42:11
there's not much. Yeah. Are they antagonistic towards
42:13
the supernatural? Like, is it is it not
42:15
a no, I think
42:17
they're pretty exclusively prey in
42:20
this. The supernatural are are
42:22
the dominant thing here in
42:24
the wasteland. Mm hmm. It's
42:27
not fun for anybody, but they
42:29
they will. We're not for
42:32
them. Yeah, definitely not. Yeah. For
42:34
humans, at least. No,
42:36
for sure. But
42:38
they are the tastiest, presumably. For
42:40
sure. I think so. Yeah,
42:42
because definitely the test is. I guess
42:45
the humans that are not humans plus means
42:48
they don't have like irradiated blood. So
42:51
they everything alive here
42:53
has irradiated blood. OK.
42:57
Yeah, sadly, it's pretty much
42:59
all spoiled. It's still, you
43:01
know, sometimes you got to drink it, but
43:04
yeah, it's pretty poison. Yeah.
43:07
There is a kerfuffle
43:10
that starts to erupt
43:12
over by the fortune
43:14
telling bat baby, who
43:17
has just thrown a fortune
43:20
at a bi-pedal
43:23
shark man. Who
43:27
whose gills are just
43:29
like spraying water
43:32
everywhere as he screams
43:35
and bangs back on the glass at this
43:37
bat baby, presumably that he
43:40
didn't like his fortune. But they are going
43:42
at it and a couple of his
43:44
friends who are who
43:46
are also, of course, sharks, yeah, yeah,
43:49
are pulling him back. And the bat
43:51
baby does not seem worried, but it is
43:53
causing a bit of a commotion over there.
43:56
This commotion could be considered
43:58
a good distraction. if
44:01
you were looking for one, but it
44:03
could also be, but
44:07
it could also be a fun
44:09
thing to watch play out. What would you
44:11
like to do? I definitely like to
44:13
approach. I think I'm nosy. Obviously I can't
44:15
keep my business out of kerfaffles.
44:19
Sure, sure, sure. You have a good heart. Does that
44:21
mean you see a problem? You
44:24
mean well? Yeah, for
44:26
sure. I will
44:28
sidle up on the
44:31
side of the baby bat. Like
44:33
I kind of want to get close to
44:36
that container. And maybe if we're all together,
44:38
I will say like y'all
44:40
want to get your fortunes read. There's
44:44
a baby bat over there. I hear they're real
44:47
good at that. The one that's
44:49
currently being harangued.
44:51
Accosted in some way, yeah. I mean, we
44:53
could probably sort that out. And then we
44:56
might get one on the house. As
44:58
entire with the hospital. See
45:00
what the issue is. Let's
45:04
do a little cowboy walkover. We
45:07
got a cowboy walkover. Yeah, of
45:10
course, in unison I imagine. And
45:13
you saddle up next to the glass
45:15
cage and you see this shark
45:18
man just. I'm telling
45:20
you, you got to give me a different
45:22
fortune. I want a different one. I want
45:24
a better one. Or you're going to be
45:27
on the roller coaster over there. And
45:29
it's never going to stop. How
45:34
is the bat taking this, right? You said that
45:36
the bat's not worried. I cannot wait
45:38
to hear. It's just like, and
45:41
like sticking its bat tongue
45:43
out and like, taunting this
45:47
man. So
45:50
the bat does not look like it's in
45:52
a lot of danger. Excuse
45:56
me, sir. I mean, what was so
45:59
bad about the fortune? that you got. Well,
46:02
first things first, the
46:04
fortune said that I'm ugly. And
46:09
I am ugly. I
46:11
am a very handsome
46:13
shark. Yeah,
46:17
right. Well,
46:20
you know, beauty is in the eye of
46:22
the beholder and you can't expect baby,
46:26
well, I'm sorry. What is your
46:28
name? And it asked lean
46:30
towards the baby that baby
46:33
that takes out a fully lit cigar
46:35
from behind his back and takes
46:38
a big puff of it and says the
46:41
name's Frank and this
46:45
is my booth. And
46:47
I just give the fortunes as I see them.
46:54
Yeah, yeah. I mean, see
46:57
what Frank said, Frank, maybe
47:00
doesn't find you attractive. And that wasn't a very
47:02
nice thing for Frank to say to you, but
47:04
do you think that if you get another fortune
47:06
from Frank that it was gonna get any better
47:08
for you, sir? Yeah, I
47:11
mean, I saw a
47:13
fellow got a fortune that said that they
47:15
were gonna be rich. I
47:17
want a fortune like that one. I
47:19
want a fortune that says I'm gonna
47:21
be rich now that I am ugly.
47:23
That's not even a fortune. Yes, honey.
47:26
Bang something glass again. That
47:28
is not a fortune. All right. Josephine,
47:33
would you like to try the
47:35
first role of this game? I
47:38
think if you're trying to calm
47:41
the energies here between
47:45
these two, I think
47:47
depending on what you're going with,
47:49
we could argue for either Guile
47:51
or guys. If you're
47:53
just trying to kind of outsmart
47:56
them, or
47:59
if you're trying. to sort of
48:01
charm your way into calming things
48:03
down. What do you think is
48:05
more your speed
48:07
here? Actually,
48:09
could I can I use a
48:11
spell? You sure can. What spell
48:13
would you like to use? Well, I yeah,
48:17
I don't know if these are defined somewhere, but
48:19
I was just going to interpret what I thought they
48:22
might be. But
48:24
there is an inspire spell. And
48:28
I feel like I just want to like, hmm.
48:30
Oh, yeah. Yeah. I mean, if you
48:32
want me to explain the way
48:35
it works is like it is it is
48:37
very loose. So you're OK. You
48:39
basically like pick like an
48:41
anchor. So it's like one
48:43
or two words that can either be a target,
48:45
a modifier range or a new aspect of the
48:47
scene. And then like
48:50
you speak the so it's like it's
48:52
almost like power words. So you're like
48:54
inspire, like inspire
48:57
friendship. Right. And then
48:59
friendship would be your like anchor to
49:01
the crowd of people or something. OK.
49:05
And then we're like shield. Jude,
49:07
and then that would be like the spell
49:10
that you cast. Right. Yeah.
49:12
OK. So it's like powerful.
49:15
You got to keep things kind of tight. Yeah.
49:17
So can I do like I think
49:19
I got to spend a blood point, I think.
49:23
And I want to put put
49:26
my hand on this shark man's
49:28
shoulder. I shoulder. Yeah,
49:30
they have shoulders. It's a
49:32
shoulder fin. It's like sort of, you know,
49:35
where does one shark on top? Legs
49:38
on the bottom. No, full
49:41
shark. The fins are just sort
49:44
of wiggling. Oh, my. As
49:46
he walks. His tail. Yeah,
49:49
his tail is like his feet
49:52
like a like a cartoon. Like a Hanna
49:54
Barbera shark. Yeah.
49:57
Yeah. It's like he's
49:59
wearing a pair. of shorts that still
50:01
do have two legs, but his
50:03
tail is just through one of them and the
50:05
other is just sort of hanging
50:08
loose at the side. Yeah, okay.
50:10
So I touched
50:13
this shark man's shoulder and
50:16
I'll say inspire
50:18
perspective. I
50:21
was saying, look man, I
50:23
don't know you, but you
50:25
can make your own fortune. You don't
50:27
need Frank to tell you what you
50:29
can or can't do or what awaits
50:32
you in these lands. You gotta claim
50:34
that for yourself. You gotta believe, you
50:36
gotta see that within yourself. Look around
50:38
you and look at all your, look
50:40
at your shark friends here with you.
50:44
You're not alone. Like sure, this
50:46
may be, you may be the
50:48
worst off as
50:50
a water-dwelling creature that got
50:52
into an endless sun, invested
50:56
wasteland in the desert, but
50:58
not a drip of water
51:00
inside, but you
51:03
are still here. You're still
51:05
surviving. Look at
51:07
you. You got so much to be proud
51:09
of and you got so much to
51:11
look forward to. Keep that
51:13
chin up. That's right. Keep that.
51:16
Frank, I'm gonna make my own fortune. Fang
51:19
up that fin up, you know what I
51:21
mean. Mm-hmm. You're
51:24
a good, you're a good person. That's
51:27
really cool. That's really
51:29
cool. Yeah. All right.
51:31
Well, I'm just gonna take this fortune
51:34
and I'm gonna give it right back
51:36
to you, Frank. And he throws it
51:38
at the cave. And
51:41
he says, I'm gonna go make my own
51:43
fortune and I'm gonna make it so that
51:45
I'm handsome. And then he
51:47
starts to wiggle away and
51:50
his shark buddies, they all
51:52
wiggle away on their tails
51:54
toward. You know what I think? I think it's
51:56
like one of those little
51:59
kitty roller coasters. is where the cars
52:01
that you all sit in are all show
52:03
the charts. This
52:12
episode of One Shot uses music from
52:14
the following artists. Salt
52:17
and the Wound by Ender. We
52:19
Ascend by Michael Bruguglio.
52:23
Wicked Curiosities by Dresden Loflamingo. A
52:26
Wizard's World by Wicked Cinema. Strange
52:29
Visitors by Andy Ellison. And
52:32
Devil's Doorstep by Wastelandr. This
52:35
episode of One Shot was edited and
52:37
sound designed by Tracy Barnett. You can
52:39
find more of their work online anywhere
52:41
at TheOtherTracy. There
52:54
you have it, that is part one
52:56
of Bloodbeam Badlands. I am so hyped
52:58
about this game and I can't wait
53:00
to have the full version in my
53:02
little mitts. Vatiguaviletti is such
53:04
a genius to me, I am so
53:06
starry eyed about him and he knows
53:08
this. And then on top
53:10
of that to be joined by such
53:12
quintessential vampire players as Laura and Josephine
53:14
is just a dream to me. I
53:17
was really blessed, toe to toe, by this
53:19
entire series. And before I go,
53:21
I want to say since this is going to be One
53:23
Shot's last episode that's going to air during
53:26
Pride this year, I
53:28
wanted to say how much I love
53:30
being a queer person, how much I
53:32
love the way games have intersected and
53:34
contributed to that journey for me, and
53:36
how much my journey through
53:39
the world of games and through
53:41
queer identity and through my relationship
53:43
to activism are all so deeply
53:45
interconnected. I feel
53:47
so lucky for my life and I am so
53:50
thankful for all the communities that I get to
53:52
share it with and that includes you. So I
53:54
wanted to say thank you and happy
53:56
Pride. As always, thank you
53:58
to the wonderfully generous. people who support OneShot
54:01
on Patreon. But if you want to support
54:03
the show in a non-monetary way, it is
54:05
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54:08
Tell your friends about the show, rate, or
54:10
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54:12
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54:14
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54:16
and OneShot news, please follow
54:18
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54:20
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54:22
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54:24
updates on our website at oneshotpodcast.com.
54:28
For information about ad rates,
54:30
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54:32
a general comment, please message
54:35
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54:37
Again, that's D-I-L-L-I-N. Finally,
54:40
the music creeping up behind me
54:42
is Adventure by Be Your Own
54:44
Pet, courtesy of Infinity Cap Records.
54:46
I can't wait to have you
54:48
back for our next adventure, heroes.
54:50
Moments will be my biggest surprise. Hello,
54:52
friends. Welcome back to our live network. We have
54:55
a little hidden space around
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here. I've never mentioned this before
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too, but we can see the
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path ofsnscest. We long to
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in the universe of Starwall Odyssey
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space is made out of the
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collective imaginations of all the thinking
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beings who live on various planets.
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These worlds are connected to each
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other through imagination. Common themes and
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ideas are strings between universes and
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to get between them people fly
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wooden ships that look like animals,
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which are powered by emotions. Also,
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people communicate with each other by contemplating orbs.
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The only way you can take pictures is getting stared at
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by a big psychic bug and people
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have already declared victory in a war over the very
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concept of evil. But I'm getting
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ahead of myself. Starwall Odyssey follows
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the adventures of the hapless inhabitants
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of the Lucky Finn Tenement Building,
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who suddenly find that their apartment
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is actually a spaceship, and that
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they're lost in a sea of
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boundless imagination. It's an actual play
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starring me, James D'Amato, Mel D'Amato,
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Ali Grower, and Drew Merzieski as
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we playtest the No Kings system,
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which will hopefully one day be
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the Skyjacks role-playing system. It toes
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the line between weird and wonderful
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slice of life and high-flying space
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fantasy. You can sample the first
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five episodes by searching for Starwall
56:33
Odyssey on your favorite podcast app,
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or get the whole thing by
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heading to patreon.com/one-shot podcast and signing
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up for $5 a month or
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more.
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