0:08

What's up everybody . This is your host D-Star

0:10

here with Uchena Jones

0:13

. Uchena Jones , the

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2023

0:17

.

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51 most influential

0:20

leaders in Wisconsin Say that

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twice Congratulations

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. Thank you . Thank you , D-Star

0:28

.

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So for the people that don't know you , can you tell us

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a little bit about yourself ?

0:31

My name again , uchena Jones . I

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am the daughter of two Nigerian

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parents . I

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am a college graduate from the University

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of Wisconsin-Madison , I'm also

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a nurse , I'm also an author

0:44

, I'm also a doula and

0:47

I'm currently in the process of

0:49

being a midwife . And , last

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but not least , I work at United Way of

0:53

Dane County as the Community Impact

0:55

Director of Health .

0:56

And a mother .

0:57

Yes , oh , my goodness .

0:59

I'm a wife .

0:59

A wife , wife , mother of

1:01

three babies .

1:02

And a community leader .

1:03

Yes , all that stuff , you know it's so hard

1:05

to keep up , it's so hard to keep up . So please

1:07

, you know , bear with me guys .

1:09

So what inspired you to become

1:11

a doula and how did your

1:13

journey lead you to this profession

1:16

?

1:16

My journey started . This year We'll make 22

1:19

years of providing active

1:21

doula support to expectant

1:24

mothers , birthing people in Madison

1:26

, dane County community and it's

1:28

been a joy . And how it started it started

1:31

with I've always wanted to be in healthcare

1:33

. Wasn't sure exactly what I wanted to be and

1:35

looking at the different professions and

1:37

kind of inspired by Bill Cosby

1:39

you know he was an OBGYN obstetrician

1:42

delivering babies and I'm like that's a dope job

1:44

. I would love to deliver babies

1:46

. Never thought in my wildest dreams that

1:48

nothing bad could actually happen with

1:50

having babies . So what did I do ? I'm looking

1:53

, I'm researching . I

1:56

learned about midwives , I learned about nurses , but I really at the time wanted to be a doctor

1:58

. Then , as I go to school and

2:01

you're looking at those grades and you're like , okay

2:03

, all right , I'm not getting A's

2:05

in every class now , so what are other

2:07

opportunities to still get in that space

2:09

? So I ended up getting my first degree and

2:12

realized that I had to you know , work

2:14

hard , get the GPA up . So

2:16

I was inquiring about maybe what about midwifery

2:18

school ? You know that's also another beautiful

2:21

field I didn't look into . I was always

2:23

tracked on being a doctor and what ended up happening

2:26

is I found a woman in Florida

2:28

can't even remember her name . I was like , hmm

2:30

, if I talk to her I need to figure out how

2:32

she got those letters , because

2:34

it said that she was like a direct entry . So she

2:36

did an apprenticeship style , became a midwife

2:38

. But she was also a certified nurse midwife

2:40

, which is pretty much having after

2:46

your nursing degree you go back to school and then you get a master's degree in midwifery

2:48

. But I'm like she got both , so I unfortunately didn't get her , I got

2:50

her secretary and her secretary

2:53

was in the process of getting certified

2:55

as a doula . So when I was talking

2:57

to her sharing my interests , and she said before

2:59

you even think you could call yourself

3:02

going into medicine , you

3:04

need to watch women labor . And

3:06

I'm like , ok , how do I do that and I'm just

3:08

only got my undergrad she

3:11

said you need to watch women birth , you

3:13

need to become a doula . So

3:15

a stranger in Florida ignited

3:18

my journey .

3:19

Okay , so what exactly is

3:21

a doula ?

3:22

So a doula is a support person and

3:24

not just a support person I mean cause it just

3:27

makes it so mundane but it's a labor support person

3:29

. It could be a man or a woman that is

3:31

in the birthing space to provide support

3:34

for that expected mother , for that birthing

3:36

person , help them navigate through their pregnancy

3:39

, through labor and through postpartum

3:41

to have a beautiful , great birthing

3:44

experience but also kind of enter into

3:46

parenthood in a way that I think I

3:48

believe all individuals who want to

3:50

expand their family should enter in . In

3:52

the past , the

3:57

role in which nurses had was , like , really critical . Like in some ways they were

4:00

like the original doulas , but with added healthcare systems , responsibilities

4:02

, all these different things . Nurses no longer

4:04

stayed with the birthing person . Instead

4:07

they're doing a lot of administrative stuff . So

4:10

this whole profession was birthed out

4:12

of a lack . But in other indigenous

4:14

cultures , in African cultures

4:17

, if you look at older countries , there's always

4:19

that older , senior mom

4:22

or the midwife in the community

4:24

that held that space that

4:26

ushered in all these new babies into the

4:28

world . This is where birthing people

4:30

went to go get their care , all these

4:32

different things , and even in some respects around

4:35

the world it still happened , but in the United

4:37

States it's more medicalized , most

4:40

babies are born in the hospital , so we're losing

4:42

those connections . So doulas

4:45

kind of like were birthed out of that lack

4:47

and you know , hold that sacred

4:49

space , kind of piecing all those things together

4:51

.

4:52

So , as a doula , what unique perspectives

4:55

or insights do you bring to

4:57

the birthing process , particularly

4:59

as a female black doula ?

5:02

One of the things that I

5:04

desire as being a doula is

5:06

bringing joy back to birth . If you

5:08

look at the history , if you do

5:10

the research , if you take the time to

5:12

find out how family practice came

5:14

about , how obstetric

5:16

gynecology came about in

5:20

some respects it was

5:22

the mistreatment of black

5:24

women , black slaves

5:26

, and

5:50

they medicalize birth in such a way that it's a disease rather than a process , rather than a rite

5:52

of passage , rather than . This is how the next generation comes forward and we should be excited . And the

5:54

perspective that I want to bring back is

5:56

it's a beautiful thing , it's a joyous thing

5:58

to see what

6:00

the next generation looks like and

6:03

, particularly for that birthing person's family

6:05

, it is something to be celebrated

6:07

, not to feel shame for

6:10

. Now , grant , not

6:12

everybody's birth story is

6:14

good , so I don't want to paint this picture like

6:16

every birth , every baby being born is just beautiful

6:19

, but understanding the magnitude

6:21

of that child coming in

6:23

and how we need to prepare and

6:25

usher and handle that birth

6:27

person and their support person and

6:30

their family with such grace

6:32

, being able to lean in and give them the

6:34

support they need so that , as they transition

6:36

into parenthood on Earth's side , that

6:39

they can handle what comes their

6:41

way , as they're raising that child

6:43

.

6:43

It's very interesting that I just

6:46

learned that women in

6:48

prison were being

6:51

shackled while they were giving

6:53

birth here in Wisconsin and

6:55

I just I couldn't even

6:57

imagine what they went

6:59

through or how they felt , because

7:01

when I was with my wife , when she was having

7:03

a baby , she was up , she was

7:06

walking , she was so , you

7:08

know , uncomfortable , just trying to get

7:10

comfortable . You need to be able

7:12

to move around , you need to be able to

7:14

. You need to be able to move , because

7:17

that's the part of the process , right ? You ? need

7:19

to like get up , walk around and

7:21

things like that . And then some you know

7:23

you might be comfortable in this position but in two

7:25

seconds you might need to switch it because

7:27

the baby's moving and things like that . So for you

7:29

to be shackled is just

7:32

like that's just against everything

7:35

.

7:35

What people don't understand is okay

7:37

. You just acknowledged that birthing

7:40

people have to move right , because the

7:42

baby's actually telling mom

7:45

, I need you to move because I'm not comfortable

7:47

. And guess what ? They're not comfortable . So

7:50

denying a birthing

7:52

person the right to birth the way

7:54

they need to , it's almost like you're setting

7:56

that child up for failure right from the

7:58

jump .

7:59

A lot of trauma for

8:01

both of them .

8:03

And it's being transferred in real time

8:05

. All the hormones is being released the

8:07

anxiety , the anxiousness , pain

8:10

, the shame . That's

8:12

a direct transfer to the generation

8:14

that's being birthed in a little while .

8:16

Tupac was born in prison . Wow

8:19

, I didn't know that I had another

8:21

gentleman that

8:23

was here . His name was Eugene

8:26

Smalls . Wow , and

8:28

he was a minister . Excuse me

8:30

, Minister , eugene Smalls , he

8:32

was born in prison .

8:35

Did he ever get to talk about the

8:38

impact ?

8:38

Yeah , he talked about it . I

8:41

don't think that ever

8:43

leaves you just knowing that

8:45

information . Like man , I was born

8:48

in a hospital in prison

8:50

. I wasn't born in a hospital , I was born

8:52

in an infirmary inside of a in prison . I wasn't born in a hospital , I was born in an infirmary inside

8:55

of a state prison . I was

8:57

like wow , and then he

8:59

ended up going to prison . So it was

9:01

like you know , it's like the cycle . You

9:03

know what I'm saying .

9:04

Exactly . And in order for us to break it

9:06

, we really got to pay attention

9:08

to the origin right and

9:10

making sure that

9:12

birthing people are handled with such care

9:14

that mothers get to

9:16

be heard and

9:19

we get to support them on their terms

9:21

. Not what the doctor says , not

9:23

what the nurse says , not

9:26

even what the doula suggests , but internally

9:28

I strongly believe that

9:30

birthing people mothers they know instinctively

9:33

what it is that they need and our job is to

9:35

empower them to use their

9:37

voice . That is where

9:40

they get the foundation of

9:42

parenting . They

9:45

carried that child for almost

9:47

nine , 10 months , 40 weeks , and

9:51

now the world is going to tell them how

9:53

they ought to raise their child ? I

9:56

don't think so , but we robbed them

9:58

of that opportunity to

10:01

be heard , to advocate for their

10:03

child . So my job is to

10:05

bring joy back , to

10:07

let them know , to trust themselves , and

10:09

my job is to just cheer you on to

10:11

the finish line . You know

10:13

I like to see myself as a guardian

10:15

of birth . I didn't realize that , you

10:18

know , and I'm unapologetic about it . And

10:21

it's a joyful time , it's

10:23

an exciting time to see what the new

10:25

generation is not only coming forth with

10:27

, but what do they look like ? Whose personalities

10:30

Are they reaching out back to grandma

10:33

, you know , so-and-so

10:36

, or auntie so-and-so , or great-great

10:38

you know , and the stories that will

10:40

come forth ? What is the information

10:43

and their knowledge that they're coming with , that they're

10:45

about to share with us ? A lot of people

10:47

you know , even like in child psychology and child development

10:49

, even like in child psychology and

10:51

child development . You

10:53

know there's this whole thing about nature versus nurture

10:56

. What

11:01

is so dope is these beings . They know things . They know

11:03

things and if we slow ourselves

11:05

down , we get to know what they know , if

11:08

we learn how they communicate . And

11:11

it's just such an amazing thing to see . And

11:14

I've been learning that and tracking

11:16

that , in not

11:18

even realizing it , over these 22

11:20

years .

11:21

The impact that it has on the father

11:23

, also during the birthing process

11:26

. I was just talking to someone earlier

11:28

today and we were kind of swapping stories

11:30

about birth stories which

11:32

is crazy because men usually

11:34

don't do that . But we were talking about

11:36

men's mental health , the toll that

11:38

it takes on a man , and he said I

11:41

had a doula and my doula let me

11:43

sleep . I was like my doula , let me sleep too he

11:45

was like I don't know

11:47

what I would have

11:49

did without her , like she was

11:51

great and just a great

11:53

experience . And he's had a couple of kids but

11:55

he was like this last one he had . It was with

11:58

the doula and it was just . It was a totally different

12:00

experience . Can you share any

12:02

memorable experiences or stories

12:04

from your work as a doula that

12:07

deeply impacted you ?

12:08

I got to start off with my first birth

12:10

, and that was again .

12:12

You've actually helped deliver over a thousand

12:14

babies , you said .

12:15

Yes , in my 22 years . So

12:17

what makes it even easier to do is

12:19

when you become a nurse . So I became a nurse seven

12:22

years after being a doula and I

12:24

felt like I needed more knowledge . I

12:27

needed more knowledge because it was very interesting the dynamics that

12:29

were playing in the room and there was times

12:31

that I was mistreated in the presence

12:33

of my client and I really felt like there was a

12:35

knowledge gap . Also , I wasn't I never

12:37

had any children at that time , you know

12:39

. So I be . I did my doula training in 2002

12:42

. I didn't get married till 2012

12:44

. So you can see , there's a 10-year gap

12:46

where I am just literally

12:49

what I read and then taking

12:51

care of birthing people and putting all those pieces

12:53

together . But something shifted

12:55

when I became pregnant

12:58

and I just started to go back

13:00

and I'm like , oh my gosh , I should not have said that

13:02

. I should have done this differently , and

13:04

I realized that that was an experience

13:07

, that was something that I needed to strengthen

13:09

my practice . But before

13:11

that moment I felt like I needed

13:13

to become a nurse to know more

13:16

, because some of the things that I would do or some of the things

13:18

I would say , the nurse will minimize it

13:20

or it will be like a competition

13:22

. So I said you know what ? Let me find out what

13:24

the other side is thinking of .

13:25

I've seen that firsthand in the hospital

13:28

. It's like they're respected but not respected

13:31

. But you know , it's like this weird

13:33

thing . The nurses feel like

13:35

what they're saying has to take

13:37

precedent over the

13:39

doula , but then the doula is like no

13:41

, I've been with them since

13:43

day one . I know her , I

13:46

know way more and from you're

13:48

reading it from a chart , I'm doing this off

13:50

of experience . You know

13:52

, and I've delivered more

13:54

babies than you Exactly .

13:56

Exactly , but I do my best

13:58

to recognize and understand

14:00

and this is the part that I learned as a nurse

14:03

is that we're a team and we're all here to

14:05

help this birthing person have an amazing

14:07

experience , this mother to have an amazing experience

14:09

with her support person and all

14:11

that stuff . Now , I can't guarantee

14:14

that the outcome will be exactly what they want

14:16

, but I can guarantee that

14:18

they will feel the support and love

14:20

and encouragement that I know

14:23

I can do and whatever information I can

14:25

pass along to make sure they can make an informed

14:27

decision . That is what I'm going to do , you

14:30

know , and I'm going to advocate like crazy

14:33

to make sure that their voice is

14:35

being heard , because a lot of times

14:37

you know when you are in

14:39

that space you're helping mothers

14:41

have babies all day long . You already

14:43

have a formed idea of how this

14:45

process is going to go .

14:47

Right and you forget that everybody

14:49

is different .

14:50

Exactly . Every family is different

14:52

. It's the same situation

14:55

A baby's going to be born , but we don't

14:57

know all the details .

14:59

And a kid never know .

15:00

Exactly . So I started

15:02

to adopt this idea of you

15:04

know what , if this is their first birth , it's

15:07

going to be my first birth too . If this is

15:09

their second , it's my second . I'm going to adjust

15:11

, but I know that I'm

15:13

an empty vessel . So when I come into that

15:15

sacred space , all my issues

15:18

, what I think about anything

15:20

, is at the door . I am of service

15:22

to my client . I'm of service

15:25

to the patient . I am of service to my client . I'm of service

15:27

to the patient and my job is to empower them with whatever

15:29

that they think they need to get

15:32

to the finish line , and that is to meet the

15:34

new generation , to meet their baby

15:36

. The thing that blows my mind

15:38

that we don't talk enough about is that birth

15:41

is spiritual . Or when does flesh

15:43

wrap itself around

15:45

spirit , around a soul , you know

15:47

? And if we understand the magnitude

15:49

of that , maybe we will handle the person

15:52

who ? And people think oh yes , the

15:54

center of the universe is outside of us . I

15:57

discovered in my 22 years the center

15:59

of the universe is within that mom

16:02

, it's

16:04

within that birthing person and it has to pass through them

16:06

, pass through her , so

16:10

that we can meet . This is no

16:12

stork dropping a baby out the sky . It's

16:15

passing through a

16:17

whole nother human being who's still living

16:19

. We

16:21

have to really sit with that . How

16:24

are we going to handle , if we don't handle ? The

16:26

mom , well . The birthing person , well

16:28

, what's happening to that child ? Have to really sit with that .

16:30

How are we going to handle if we don't handle ?

16:31

the mom , well . The birthing person , well , what's happening to that child ? So your

16:33

first birth ? Yes , so my first birth

16:35

, thank you . 22 years ago

16:38

, because it was actually in January

16:40

, I was a brand new nurse . I read

16:42

all the things . I'm ready , I'm ready 27

16:45

hours Wow . Of continuous

16:48

care , 27

16:50

hours . We had a false start actually

16:53

.

16:54

So you were a nurse at this time .

16:55

No . Oh , you were a doula , a doula . I

16:59

didn't become a nurse until 2009 .

17:01

I know a nurse will switch shifts .

17:02

Yeah .

17:03

But a doula , well , a one

17:05

will stay until

17:07

yes or get some relief

17:09

. Three days they'll stay there with

17:11

you ?

17:12

yes , that was that . I was

17:14

that doula of yesterday , you know

17:16

, providing that continuous support and

17:18

it was good to do , because I didn't have no boyfriend

17:20

. I had no husband , I had no kids . Um

17:23

, as I progressed then I had to

17:25

. But what was so interesting

17:28

about that first birth , even with everything that

17:30

I read , even what I was trying to do , I

17:32

was having serious issues with the nurse . The

17:35

nurse will say , well , it's not that hard

17:37

, it's not that hard , it shouldn't hurt that much

17:39

.

17:41

Well then , if it's hurting that much , then

17:44

maybe that's a sign that something's wrong .

17:46

Yeah , or ask her

17:48

the right questions , like where does

17:50

it hurt ? How can I help you , really ? And

17:52

I was watching the way

17:54

she would interact . And when she was gone , I asked

17:57

my client like , how do you feel ? She

18:01

couldn't articulate that she was having issues with

18:03

the nurse , but you could tell that she was feeling

18:05

she had low self-esteem , she was feeling

18:08

defeated , she doesn't , she didn't feel like she was progressing

18:10

. And I'm like , yes , you are . You just got to give

18:12

your body permission to allow

18:14

itself to open up and it's going to take

18:17

time . This is your first time . So , mind

18:19

you , no baby , no experience

18:21

for me as a mom , but I'm

18:23

going based on what I read and

18:26

when , at some point during

18:28

that labor , she mustered up some courage

18:31

and strength , she went through all the

18:33

different phases you go through where you feel

18:35

like , okay , I got this because the pain is not that bad

18:37

. Then the pain gets really bad . But I was so

18:39

proud of her . She didn't get an epidural even

18:41

though the pressure was on

18:43

27 hours . But no epidural

18:46

. She did the tub . We tried different positions

18:48

and then every time they checked her , she made progress

18:50

, she made progress and now it's time

18:52

to push . And when baby

18:54

Sophia came , oh my gosh

18:57

, I was like I can do this

18:59

, I can do this .

19:01

Everybody cries .

19:02

Oh , yes , everybody cried

19:04

, but I didn't

19:07

cry when the baby came . I cried

19:09

when , in the

19:11

mother's most vulnerable state , she

19:14

looked at her partner and she said , no

19:16

matter what , even if it means I die

19:18

, having your baby like she had no regrets

19:21

. That had me tearing

19:23

up like crazy and

19:25

he's like you're not going to die , it's going to be okay

19:27

. But I don't know if he really felt

19:29

that , but he gave her

19:31

what she needed .

19:33

Right .

19:34

And now they're celebrating . Baby Sophia

19:36

is here , the next generation is here

19:38

, and I am like , how

19:41

can this not be something you want

19:43

to do all the time ? And I'm like trying to

19:45

figure out how do I keep coming back to the space and place

19:47

you know ? So then I

19:49

made it my mission . Okay , all

19:51

right , let me figure out how I can get more clients

19:54

, let me see who I can help . Let me put the word

19:56

out there , you know , but again , internet

19:58

wasn't what it was . Then I didn't have no website

20:00

. I didn't know about having a business , but

20:03

it was word of mouth that I started to

20:05

. For the most part in the early years I

20:07

did a lot of college students , you know , different

20:09

backgrounds , different races , it didn't matter . I just

20:11

needed to be in that space to learn what I needed

20:13

to learn . I needed to pay attention to the dynamics

20:16

and then , when I started to

20:18

build my confidence , I said I need more knowledge

20:20

. So then I went back to school and became

20:22

a nurse because I needed to know what they

20:24

knew and didn't realize that I'm

20:27

a unicorn . There's a lot of doulas

20:29

who are doulas . There are nurses

20:31

who become doulas , but it's not

20:33

quite common to be a doula

20:36

and go on to be a nurse . Even

20:38

as a nurse I didn't do things like my

20:40

colleagues because I had a doula brain , I

20:42

had a doula heart about work . I

20:44

didn't use medications like everybody did . It's

20:46

there . But because I saw birth

20:48

, I understood the physiological

20:51

process of birth and that it takes time

20:53

. I fought for that , I advocated for that

20:55

. Whether they were my patient or my client , same

20:57

care .

20:58

So what are some of the challenges you

21:00

face as a black woman in

21:02

the doula profession and how

21:05

have you overcome

21:07

them ?

21:07

I don't know if I overcome them , but I have

21:09

learned to work with them . Some of the challenges

21:12

is just the fact that I'm black . A

21:14

lot of people who may know me . I'm

21:16

6'1" , so when I walk in the room

21:18

it's like who is she ? What is she about to do ? I

21:21

always have to have myself mentally

21:23

ready and prepared . Mentally ready

21:25

, prepared to be undermined , disrespected

21:28

. I don't know how many times I came into the birthing space

21:30

and say I'm the doula and they say , oh , that's the patient's

21:33

sister . Or if I find them doing something

21:35

that I don't agree with because , guess what , I'm

21:37

also a labor and delivery nurse .

21:39

So I know

21:41

the process , you know the procedure .

21:43

I don't know how many times I had to pull that card

21:45

and say , well , right up the street

21:48

, I am also a labor and delivery

21:50

nurse and can I ask you a little

21:52

bit more questions , Cause I don't

21:54

understand why you are taking that course

21:56

with this , particular

21:58

with my client . You know that kind of thing . The other

22:00

thing about doulas the Trump card right

22:03

, Right , right . I keep it in my back pocket

22:05

. I don't always have to use it , but I

22:08

do a lot of observing and my job

22:10

is to make sure , like asking the

22:12

mom , the birthing person did

22:14

all your questions get answered ? Do

22:17

you feel safe ? Do you feel supported

22:19

? I don't know how many times I walked in the room and

22:21

the birthing person tells me , you know what , the

22:23

fact that you walked in here , they're caring

22:26

for me better , what ? I didn't even say anything

22:28

. I didn't do anything .

22:29

Everything changed .

22:30

And everything changed . They didn't see

22:32

me , they didn't come around

22:34

, but they start showing up . When you showed up and

22:36

I started to pay attention to that .

22:43

And I'm like , wow , this is crazy . Which leads me to my next question how do you

22:45

approach supporting Black mothers , specifically considering the

22:47

disparities and challenges they

22:49

may face in the health

22:52

care system ? Because we know

22:54

the statistics for Wisconsin

22:56

it is like the worst place

22:59

in the country to be a woman

23:01

of color having a baby .

23:03

Yes , it's one of the worst states

23:05

and our outcomes are not necessarily

23:08

the greatest and the best , but

23:11

I feel like every time I put my foot

23:13

down and I go on to the unit

23:15

and I'm providing care for that client , that's

23:17

me combating that number , that's me

23:19

working against that statistic . Now , keep in

23:21

mind I'm only one . So one of the

23:23

things I've had the privilege of doing and

23:25

being has become a doula trainer . So

23:33

now I get to train other people with the knowledge and the skill set that I have so

23:35

they can go into the birthing space and be able

23:37

to provide similar support , if not better

23:39

, because I like to think

23:41

in the 22 years I've gotten better . It's

23:46

not easy being an advocate and

23:50

it's not easy always

23:52

feeling like you have to fight . So

23:55

it's really , really important that in

23:57

this work that we do , we do

23:59

some self-care , because there's a lot of things

24:01

that happen , like moral injury when

24:04

you see something and it's like , or

24:06

some obstetric violence where

24:08

you know rights were taken away . A

24:11

birthing person didn't get to informally

24:13

consent to something , but they felt

24:15

that it was important right now and override

24:18

that birthing person's

24:20

concern and , as a result

24:22

, led to moral injury . Something happened

24:24

. You know it doesn't have to

24:26

necessarily result in the death of a child

24:29

right but it's an injury

24:31

that turns and becomes

24:33

trauma very quickly that can impact

24:35

that birthing person , that mother's ability to

24:38

have more children in what ways do you

24:40

integrate cultural practices

24:42

and traditions into your

24:44

doula work , particularly within

24:46

the black community ? So , like I

24:49

mentioned in the beginning , I am the daughter of

24:51

Nigerian parents and I was born

24:53

and raised I didn't include that part . I was born

24:55

and raised in New York City . I have a husband who's from Louisiana

24:57

, so I've gotten to learn a lot

25:00

.

25:00

The dirty dirty yes . Does

25:02

he still have his accent .

25:05

Only when he's , you know , pressed , you

25:07

know , but for the most part if he's happy

25:09

and go lucky , he won't catch it . But there's a moth

25:11

. It might be a different story . But one of the things

25:13

that I've come to learn is when

25:15

I am interacting and I'm meeting my clients

25:18

and working with them at least in

25:20

prenatal , because it's very different when you're a nurse , you just

25:22

get what you get , your assignment . But when I

25:24

have the opportunity to get

25:26

a client , I like to spend time to

25:28

get a sense of who they are , what they like , what matters

25:31

to them , what are their

25:33

expectations of their birth experience , how

25:35

is their pregnancy going , who is their

25:37

support and how can I

25:39

be of service . So if some

25:42

of the descriptive nature is I want , like

25:44

, some mothering where I get to really

25:46

nurture , then that's what I do . I

25:49

nurture . If I mean even

25:51

like setting up the room so

25:53

that it's welcoming . Okay , well

25:55

, let's plan that , you know . Did you get your gown

25:57

that you're going to wear as you

25:59

welcome this new life ? Did you get your hair done

26:01

? What self-care things are you doing

26:04

? Talking to the birth partner , what concerns

26:06

do you have and how can I be of help

26:08

? How would you like me to support you

26:10

as well , because you guys are a team .