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930 - ‘The Roz & Mocha Retro Show’ – WIshes, Beards & Nipple Hair!

930 - ‘The Roz & Mocha Retro Show’ – WIshes, Beards & Nipple Hair!

Released Sunday, 23rd June 2024
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930 - ‘The Roz & Mocha Retro Show’ – WIshes, Beards & Nipple Hair!

930 - ‘The Roz & Mocha Retro Show’ – WIshes, Beards & Nipple Hair!

930 - ‘The Roz & Mocha Retro Show’ – WIshes, Beards & Nipple Hair!

930 - ‘The Roz & Mocha Retro Show’ – WIshes, Beards & Nipple Hair!

Sunday, 23rd June 2024
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Episode Transcript

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0:00

This is the Roz and Mocha

0:03

Retro Show. Roz Party Lookout. All

0:06

right, we are back with another episode of the Roz

0:09

and Mocha Retro Podcast. This is where we dig into

0:11

the archives of the Roz and Mocha Show and relive

0:13

some of our favorite moments and your favorite moments. I'm

0:15

Shem, that's Dammit, Maury, that's Maria. Who would like to

0:17

go first? I'll go first. Go ahead, Maria. Okay.

0:21

So if you had one wish, okay?

0:24

But your partner's one

0:26

wish was to change something about

0:29

you. What would you do? Would

0:31

you be happy about it or would you be sad about

0:33

it? I think it depends on what the wish was, right?

0:36

Yeah. Like if the thing to change about

0:38

me was like a physical feature

0:41

or something, then I don't know. Like

0:43

if it just changed my wardrobe, I'd be like, okay, cool. See,

0:45

I don't... The way I look

0:48

at it is that like they shouldn't be

0:50

wishing to change anything about you. What

0:52

if they're given that wish though? Like yeah, this is yours,

0:54

you're saying you would pass it. No, you pick the

0:56

wish. You have one wish. Your partner says,

0:59

I want to change this about Shem. Would

1:01

you be happy or upset? I would hope

1:03

that they would decline, but... But

1:07

if it's for the better. Better for

1:09

who though? What if it's not better for me? What if they're

1:11

like, I want a smaller you, Shem, but

1:13

I like the way that I look. You

1:15

know? Well then, I mean, then

1:17

that's a whole other problem. I mean, if it's just

1:19

like, I want to change about you, Snore, like

1:22

you're a, you know... Like

1:24

sleeping shoes. Yeah, totally fair. Totally fair.

1:27

Totally fair. All right, so when is... So they

1:29

debate, Roz and Mocha debate about this and I

1:31

don't know, it's quite interesting. All right, let's listen. Roz

1:34

and Mocha, Retro 2015. It's

1:39

also World Wish Day. So

1:42

let me ask you this question. Yes. Am

1:44

I the only one? You know some people sit around. Yes.

1:47

Hashtag blessed. Hashtag grateful. You know, some people sit

1:49

around, they wonder like what they would do if

1:51

they won the lottery and all this stuff, right?

1:53

You secretly spend that money in your head. Yeah.

1:56

When you're alone, you just do things like this. I always wonder

1:58

what I would do if I had... Wishes, which

2:00

is weird Like if I

2:02

had like wishes like I could wish for I could

2:05

wish for something. So here's the question I'll pose it

2:07

to the two of you. Good morning. Morrie. Yeah, hashtag

2:09

blessed hashtag grateful It's four one

2:12

six eight seven. Oh eighty eight eighty eight if

2:14

you had one wish, huh, right? Yeah, if

2:16

you had one wish And

2:21

you used it to change a Part

2:26

of your partner Okay

2:31

Use it to change if you

2:33

wish like physically if you yes

2:35

if you wished a physical change

2:37

on your partner would they be?

2:40

Happy about it or would they be pissed at

2:42

you for it? I'll give you

2:44

an example if I wished Katherine was six inches

2:47

taller She'd probably be very happy about it. If

2:49

I wish Katherine had bigger boobs. She'd be pissed

2:51

at me for it, right? It's

2:54

a very selfish thing if I use my one wish to give

2:56

her bigger boobs Maybe she

2:58

don't want right, you know exactly that's what I'm

3:00

saying. Yeah. Yeah, right if you had one wish

3:03

One wish and you used

3:06

it to physically alter your partner Would they

3:08

be happy for it or would they be

3:10

pissed at you for it? This is a

3:12

very tricky question Anyways

3:15

four one six eight seven. Oh eighty eight eighty eight Maury

3:18

if you had one wish to physically

3:20

alter your partner would Matthew be happy

3:22

about it or would he be pissed

3:24

about it before you answer I'm gonna

3:26

say that I have a feeling that

3:30

Maury and his fiancee dammit Matthew

3:32

spoke about this already before after they have

3:35

I keep it clean Maury I

3:37

would wish that he would stop bothering me

3:39

about my belly. No, that's not that's not

3:41

physical When

3:45

I repeated the question to you looked at me like I

3:47

was treating you like an idiot Okay,

3:50

I will repeat the question to you

3:52

again I Listen

3:55

I get the question you don't

3:57

get the question Because

4:00

the answer you gave was not

4:02

in relation to the actual question.

4:04

It's my physicality that I'm wishing

4:06

that he wouldn't make fun of.

4:10

No! Okay. Uh-huh.

4:12

Ask again. If you had one wish, and

4:15

you had to use that wish to

4:17

physically change something about your

4:19

partner, would they be grateful

4:21

for the change you gave them, or would they

4:24

be pissed at the change you gave them? Pissed?

4:28

Pissed? What would that

4:30

change be? Keep

4:32

it clean. Well, then I

4:34

can't say it. Oh, Jesus. No, I

4:36

wish that Matthew did not

4:38

have the ability to eat everything and

4:41

stay skinny. Ah, well, that's no, that

4:43

doesn't count. Physically

4:46

change something about your partner. Physically

4:49

change something about your partner. So

4:51

you would make Matthew fatter. Yes. Okay,

4:54

that's what we're looking for now. Alright.

4:56

And in turn, it wouldn't matter how

4:58

I looked. Okay,

5:00

so you would put like, you would wish, that's

5:02

a terrible wish. Oh my God. Are

5:05

we talking like a couple pounds, or are we talking like 10, 15? Oh,

5:08

like 30 pounds. Okay, so. 30

5:11

pounds? He only weighs 120. This is why we

5:13

asked this question. So, Maury's wish, if you had

5:15

one wish, and you had to physically alter your

5:17

partner, the question is, would they be grateful for

5:20

it, or would they be pissed for it? Maury

5:22

is so self-conscious about his own body, does not

5:24

like the way Matthew talks to Maury about his

5:26

body, so Maury would use his wish to even

5:28

it out, and he would put 30 pounds on

5:31

Matthew. Yeah, that is

5:33

a terrible wish. That is

5:35

horrible. That is a terrible,

5:37

terrible wish. It is, and that's why

5:39

I asked the question, could you

5:41

imagine, Matthew just wakes up one day,

5:43

all of a sudden he's stuck, he's

5:46

starting to wear Maury's clothes. All

5:49

those striped shirts. So,

5:53

what would... Mine, I think... Then my

5:55

other dream would come true, where I'm

5:57

dating myself. So

6:00

would uh would your wife be grateful or would

6:02

she be or would she be I think she

6:04

would be grateful because

6:07

my wish would be For

6:11

her to have The

6:13

perfect hair that she didn't have to go

6:15

to the salon Go get it

6:18

done all you wish that she would just always have just

6:20

perfect hair I think she would be grateful okay, you're like

6:22

yo my hair looks bomb I don't gotta write I don't

6:24

gotta do nothing to it I don't ever have to go

6:26

to the salon again right, but she would also never be

6:28

able to change it though I'm

6:31

sure she's fine with that yeah, you would give your wife

6:33

the same hairstyle for the rest of her life Oh, yeah,

6:36

maybe not I think at some point she might be

6:38

pissed at that See

6:41

it's a very difficult question I

6:43

know bro. I know without having

6:46

the consequence of answering Yes,

6:53

yes, I want to answer the question. I just

6:55

don't want to have to answer for the question

6:57

right right So

7:01

far clear none blowing up yet

7:03

hashtag grateful You

7:11

have anything that you guys would change about your

7:14

partners or ex-partners how long

7:16

you have Other

7:20

next this goes back to 2015 and So

7:24

Maury has a pretty healthy beard Mocha

7:27

Roz all have very healthy beards, but there was

7:29

a pride but beard as in physical beard Yes,

7:31

not a woman that's pretending to be my partner

7:33

so that no one knows I'm gay is that

7:36

what a beard is you didn't know that No,

7:38

I didn't know Yeah,

7:42

yeah like you like your yeah, oh, it's like

7:44

a cover yeah, okay well a beard We're talking

7:46

about the physical sense the physical beard hair on

7:48

your face There was a time believe

7:51

it or not rosa mocha did not have beards

7:53

And they this goes back to 2015

7:56

when they were finally starting to grow

7:58

their beards in ridiculous conversation Take

8:00

a listen to this. It's

8:04

the kind of winter

8:06

day where you know

8:09

when you breathe in through your nose and

8:12

stuff just starts to stick. Oh

8:14

yeah because your inside nose hairs

8:16

freeze instantly. Yeah it's that

8:18

kind of day. So grow a beard

8:20

if you can before you leave the house. Oh my face

8:22

was so warm this morning. Moka

8:25

and I both grew, well Moka's beard is

8:27

much stronger than mine by the way. Oh yeah. And

8:30

by the way there is only one way to describe a man's beard.

8:33

It's full. No, strong. Oh

8:35

okay. That's it. That's the only word that should

8:37

ever be used to describe a man's beard and if a man does not have

8:39

a strong beard nothing should be said about his beard. Hahahaha.

8:42

Right? Like Moka right now,

8:44

very strong beard. Yeah. Very

8:46

strong. I'm going for the Rick Ross logo. You

8:48

have and your hairline on your beard. I'm

8:53

trying not to describe this. Your

8:55

hair starts right underneath your bottom

8:57

lip. Oh yeah easily. Like

8:59

you don't have the two little patches under your

9:01

lip. Like you have full hair. Like

9:04

you know. People wish they could get a beard. A

9:07

beard hairline like that. Your beard hairline is

9:09

very strong and you have some grays in

9:11

it too. I do. How did that

9:13

make you feel when that came in? Uh a little

9:16

uncomfortable. Did it? But then I

9:18

embraced it. Cause you don't have gray on

9:20

your head right? No none. Do you have

9:22

gray on your chest? Oh dude I found

9:24

one. Hahahaha. Just the other night. Hahahaha. Just

9:26

the other night. Yeah. I

9:28

was going to text you but I thought that would be weird. But

9:31

I found one. You found a gray

9:34

on your chest. Just one. One lonely gray.

9:36

Yeah. One less lonely gray. Yeah. And

9:39

I was like WTF. Yeah. That's not supposed

9:42

to happen. No did you leave it or did you like did you

9:44

let it party with all the other ones or did you get rid

9:46

of it? Yeah still there. Still there. Yeah man

9:48

you gotta leave that. Yeah. I got lots of

9:50

grays on my chest now. I got lots of grays on my beard too. Yeah. Yeah.

9:53

What's. Good morning Morrie.

9:55

Good morning. Hot.

9:58

Delicious. No,

18:00

I like baggy pants. You like baggy

18:02

pants, okay. Sometimes when the- More room for

18:04

the hair to grow. I know, that's why. That's why the

18:06

hair on my legs is very short. I

18:08

think maybe sometimes when your knee rubs up

18:11

against denim, do you spend a lot of

18:13

time on your knees? I just put soap

18:15

on it and that's it. Not really, I

18:17

don't usually look at my knees. Okay, but

18:19

you spend a lot of time on your

18:21

knees though. By clean, if you mean by

18:23

cleaning it, then yes. No, I don't mean,

18:26

do you pay a lot of attention to

18:28

your knees? No, I don't mean like- Like

18:31

a shower. Like when you see somebody, you know, who made

18:33

a beautiful dinner and you know, I say, did you spend

18:35

a lot of time on that? That's not what I mean.

18:39

When I say, do you spend a lot of

18:41

time on your knees, I mean, are you physically

18:43

on your knees a lot? Oh yes, yes, yes.

18:45

Oh, of course you are. Yes, well that will

18:47

explain it then, because sometimes the rubbing and the

18:49

pressure and everything else, you will get like a

18:51

built up, you know, hair in there. And then

18:53

eventually that skin maybe just opens up and then

18:55

you get this giant hair that comes out of

18:57

it. Oh, that makes sense.

19:00

Yeah, it's like me, I spend a ton of time on

19:02

my chest and next thing I know I have four inch nipple hair.

19:05

That's a thought. Oh yeah, I

19:07

also have a nipple hair too.

19:10

Yeah. It's maybe an inch long.

19:12

Hey dude, I'm gonna be honest with you,

19:14

I gotta stop this conversation. All right. Okay.

19:16

Thanks for the call. I

19:20

mean, I don't know where to go from that, but

19:22

gross. What else can you

19:25

say? Hey listen, thank you for listening to

19:27

another episode of the Ross Mocha Retro Podcast,

19:29

where we relive some fun moments and awkward

19:31

and weird, nasty moments sometimes from the Ross

19:33

Mocha Show. If you have a moment that

19:35

you'd like for us to relive, just let us know about it,

19:37

okay? And we'll do that. Have a good one. Bye. Thanks

19:40

for listening to the Ross and Mocha Show

19:42

Podcast. Catch the guys live. Weekday mornings from

19:44

six to 10. On Kiss 92.5. Kiss92.5.com.

19:48

Or download the Kiss 92.5 app.

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