Episode Transcript
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0:45
How did you and Will lead me, right?
0:47
You guys are friends. I've heard. Allegedly.
0:51
You guys are trying to convince people that you're friends,
0:53
right? Yeah, we keep telling
0:55
people that separately. People don't believe
0:57
it. They say you have
1:00
no friendship chemistry. Nothing in
1:02
common. Brutal. Brutal. So brutal.
1:04
We actually met at Vinny, previous
1:07
guest, Billy Bonka was his name
1:09
on our show. We met at
1:11
his birthday party and I was
1:13
there as Vinny's friend and Rekha
1:15
was not. I had never
1:17
met Vinny. I had seen some of his
1:19
videos, but mutual friend Patrick
1:21
McDonald said, I'm going
1:24
to a birthday party.
1:26
And I was like,
1:28
I'll go. That's funny because
1:30
it didn't sound like you got invited
1:32
in that interaction. Okay. Hey, is something
1:34
wrong? Are you okay? You're
1:39
kind of coming at me. I'm like learning
1:41
how to get invited to stuff. Yeah, I think
1:43
what's happening is I told Sean I was going
1:45
to Vinny's party and Sean didn't say anything. And
1:48
now he's realizing he could have been there too.
1:50
Oh, interesting. Yeah. Sean, this is actually kind
1:52
of a lesson for you. Yeah. Listen up
1:55
buddy. I'll go to like
1:57
literally whatever. So someone's like I'm writing
1:59
for the the White House Correspondents Center. You
2:01
could be like, I'll go, and then
2:03
you're there, and then you meet Willy, yeah. And
2:05
I'm always there. You've
2:09
never said no to a birthday party. I would
2:11
never say no. Oh, this guy, he's a hog
2:13
for birthdays. Someone just said no to my birthday
2:15
party. Yeah, I'm out of
2:17
town. Hey
2:22
Willy, I'll go. Oh
2:24
no. Uh oh, oh no. Oh
2:26
no. Oh. Welcome
2:38
back to sitcom D&D,
2:40
a real play Dungeons and Dragons
2:42
podcast recorded in front of a
2:44
fake studio audience. Today we are
2:46
picking up at, you didn't guess
2:48
it, not Bottoms Up, not the
2:50
Tavern and In. We're picking up
2:53
at a local Frasier
2:56
radio station, or the equivalent
2:58
of a radio station in
3:00
our world. And
3:02
that is KPWT, where the
3:04
gang is just sitting in
3:07
the lobby waiting to guest
3:10
on the most popular talk
3:12
radio advice show in Frasier,
3:15
Hey There Delilah, with
3:18
the famous radio
3:20
host Delilah herself. The
3:23
gang is anxiously awaiting to
3:26
get onto the show to
3:28
promote Jennifer's mayoral campaign.
3:31
So we're gonna pick up there, sound
3:33
speeding, and
3:35
we're rolling. Dice.
3:39
Also quite on set before that. Yeah, you
3:42
missed that, you missed that for sure. I'm
3:45
nervous, we have a guest. When you
3:47
need a break from this crazy
3:49
world to see your friends in
3:52
Philadelphia, find some Bastion chalice chip
3:54
and beef at the noble bottoms
3:56
up as step by
3:58
step our growing pain. Our
4:00
improving home and away
4:02
We're feeling absolutely fabulous
4:05
On another happy day We're
4:08
in different worlds with different strokes
4:10
But good times will not end
4:13
So cheers to all our family
4:16
and our friends Starring
4:21
Aaron Keith as chalice glass
4:24
Elizabeth Andrews as beef We'll
4:27
lead man sewer as chip a hoi Ben
4:30
Briggs as Sebastian Von Hugh Grant And
4:33
Sean Coyle as everything else Sitcom
4:36
D&D is filmed in front of a fake studio
4:38
audience My
4:43
radio voice This is
4:45
my radio voice I think
4:47
you could go bigger Chip I feel
4:49
like that's too subtle This
4:51
is my radio voice We're
4:54
getting closer for sure Chalice
4:56
is helping beef stuff
4:58
his pants with all of the free snacks and
5:02
perks that are in the radio Beef has a
5:04
bow tie on that he's nervous if he should
5:06
have it on her Beef, nobody is going
5:08
to see what you're wearing This is the fanciest
5:10
you've dressed in a long time I
5:12
look really nice, right? You look stunning
5:14
Is your hair starting to grow back on the top
5:16
of your head? No Whoa,
5:20
okay, it's okay I'm getting a sense that we're
5:22
all a little nervous Everyone's a little bit on
5:24
edge Not me, I'm
5:26
ready to speak my mind Wait,
5:29
Jennifer? Yeah Let me smell your
5:31
breath, are you drunk? Always, girl
5:33
Oh no, oh no, oh no Or
5:36
are we not supposed to be drunk? I
5:38
don't know It
5:41
could make it better, could make it worse She's
5:43
just so perfect, Delilah, you know I just can't
5:45
believe I'm going to like see her I've
5:48
heard her I know, she has such
5:50
a stunning voice Now I know
5:52
why you're dressed up, beef It's all
5:54
coming together No,
5:56
no, no, no Is that why you're starting to
5:59
grow your hair back? No, I'm now wondering
6:01
do you have hair that you can grow on
6:03
the top of your head and you've just been
6:05
shaving it into that? I've been choosing. Oh, I
6:07
think Delilah's No, no
6:09
one's calling us. Nothing's coming You've
6:14
chosen this beef goes to the door and
6:16
kind of like tries to get out You
6:20
have a full head of hair I'm
6:23
sick. I'm sick The
6:25
door handle that beef is like jiggling then opens up
6:28
from the other side and pushes into the room almost
6:30
not Steve under his butt Oh Pardon
6:33
me. Um, is this
6:35
I'm looking for Jennifer
6:37
the rats mayoral campaign
6:39
team Okay,
6:43
so in a second here you
6:45
will meet Delilah before going on
6:47
the air you can get
6:49
any questions out there You're
6:52
going to be taking part in Delilah's show,
6:54
you know where voice
6:57
snails will be heard out loud
7:00
and you can respond with Delilah
7:02
on Advice
7:05
and at some point you can plug whatever it is
7:07
You paid us to plug and then
7:09
we'll wrap it up and the man is an Eric
7:12
okra or like a bird person cool But
7:15
he's a crane long neck
7:17
long neck Circular like
7:19
Harry Potter style glasses tiny
7:23
Super tiny nose. Yeah, they seem like they're not
7:25
doing anything. I'd be so far from his eyes
7:28
Oh, yeah, they're they're they seem decorative to
7:30
be honest the perfect cartoon. Does he have
7:32
practical glasses closer to his eyes, too? Yes,
7:34
he does. Yes, and those are big and
7:36
match the size of his eyes I'm glad
7:38
you asked believe and the craziest thing is
7:40
he has perfect vision Yeah
7:47
Style glasses if you need
7:49
anything throughout the process. My
7:51
name is Ichabod Ichabod
7:54
heads out back into where like the actual
7:56
studio Itself is and
7:58
leaving you all in the lobby to
8:00
talk amongst yourselves. Oh my god, I can't believe we're
8:02
doing the advice column. I didn't know that we were
8:05
going to be doing the infamous advice column with her.
8:07
I mean, like, what? No
8:09
sweat, you guys. We give each other
8:11
good advice all of the time. Yeah,
8:14
and, you know, we're obviously going to
8:16
be, like, giving advice to the people,
8:18
and, you know, that's obviously going to
8:20
show how good of a campaign we
8:22
are going to have. And very little
8:24
pressure or stakes or anything. In our
8:26
lives' rule, we're very wise. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
8:28
Yeah, I'm about to go off.
8:32
Whoa, what was that? I thought I
8:34
heard thunder. Did I do that? That
8:37
was wild. Yeah, that was crazy. Whoa.
8:39
I knew I was more powerful than
8:41
I thought. Did you just drive a
8:43
car to here, Jennifer? She's
8:45
Stuart Littling in the lobby. She has,
8:47
like, a car all over her. Yeah!
8:52
God, Jennifer, stop Stuart Littling everywhere.
8:55
If you're going to be on the campaign
8:58
trail, you got it right in style. She's
9:01
drunk driving right now. That's
9:03
a toy car. That's so sick. A
9:06
small cop car behind her turns out
9:08
its cherries. Oh, God,
9:10
this is not good. Guys, pick me up.
9:13
I grabbed Jennifer. And
9:15
as you do, the door opens again,
9:18
and Delilah herself walks
9:20
out to introduce herself. And
9:23
Rekha, would you be so kind
9:25
to actually describe what Delilah looks
9:27
like? Delilah is also, like, a
9:29
bird-like person, most typical to a
9:31
crane or most similar to a
9:34
crane. Long features,
9:37
long beak, long mac. But
9:39
she's like, I'm not a bird. I'm not
9:42
a bird. Likes to make a
9:44
point, like, if you're like, oh, yeah, you do bird stuff, I'm
9:47
not a bird. She
9:50
has, like, kind of, like, gorgeous,
9:52
like, blonde hair, glasses, very
9:54
similar to Ichabod's situation. There's, like,
9:56
kind of gorgeous, like,
9:59
NPR. and then
10:01
maybe more practical readers up top,
10:05
wearing just like kind of a sweater that has like
10:07
a collared shirt attached under it, just like very pleasing,
10:10
soothing vibe to her. Hey
10:15
there, sweethearts. Hey there,
10:18
Delilah. Hi, Delilah. I'm
10:22
so glad you guys are here for the community
10:24
segment. You know, a
10:27
lot of times I give my advice and it's good. It's
10:30
good. It is, it is. It's more than
10:32
good, it's exceptional, Delilah. And right, and correct.
10:34
Oh, you're such sweethearts. You smell amazing. You
10:36
don't even have to, you're on the radio,
10:38
you don't even have to smell so good,
10:40
it's crazy. I make sure to bathe a
10:42
few times a day. I told you, beef,
10:45
we should be bathing. Ugh,
10:47
ugh. You really can work up a sweat in
10:50
the booth, giving life-changing advice, but this
10:52
community segment's really all about diversifying the advice
10:54
I give to people, you know? We can't
10:56
just have my voice. There's other
10:58
voices in the room, so I appreciate y'all coming down.
11:01
Oh my God, of course, of course, of course, of
11:03
course, of course, of course, of
11:05
course. Oh, are you okay? No.
11:08
No. And
11:10
maybe let's not touch Delilah. Oh,
11:13
sorry, sorry. They're all holding her
11:15
hand. Yeah, like her forearm and
11:17
her shoulder. Oh, sorry, sorry.
11:20
We'll just file in here and take our seat. Delilah,
11:22
there's your seat. Of course, on the left-hand
11:24
side of the table, everybody else in the
11:27
right-hand side here, we have you set up
11:29
in a row. Whoa,
11:31
you can spin 380 in these. They're
11:34
just spinning and making themselves dizzy and sick.
11:38
You might wanna cool off on the spinning
11:40
before the advice. That's a lesson I've
11:42
had to learn the hard way. I've
11:45
thrown up on the air before. Oh, you
11:47
have? What? I heard that
11:49
episode. It was amazing. You won a
11:51
bunch of awards for journalism for that
11:53
one, right? Absolutely, absolutely, because I was
11:56
giving opinions on a war. Wow.
12:00
Not a war. Not a war. Yeah.
12:02
Too many of those. I
12:05
can't even keep track which war it was, but I was giving
12:07
opinions on a war and I barfed right into the mic and
12:09
well, we won a Peabody, so. Wow.
12:13
That's always the aim every time we
12:15
start recording. And so
12:17
now I'm in my little side booth
12:19
over here, working the technical side. I'm
12:22
gonna give everyone a countdown. I'll
12:25
do the numbers five and four. And
12:27
then for three and two and one,
12:29
I'm just gonna use my fingers and
12:31
then we will be live. Incredible. Perfect,
12:33
perfect. Okay. Yeah. So Delilah,
12:36
you'll take it away right after as
12:38
you do. Great. Here
12:40
we go. And five. Five.
12:43
Four. Oh sweetie, you don't need to
12:45
count. Three. Oh, okay. Two. Two.
12:48
You guys won. Okay, hold on. One.
12:51
You guys don't. Action. No, okay, I'm
12:53
not, we're not recording yet. You don't count. Nobody
12:56
can do the silent. I love that. I love
12:58
that. It's a common mistake. My early, my first
13:00
two years I was counting down. Okay.
13:03
On the radio. And
13:05
five. Four. Three.
13:10
Two. One. Dice.
13:14
Wait, wait, wait, good chose. Why'd you say dice? I
13:16
don't know. We are live.
13:18
And live. We are live, guys.
13:21
Sing. Hey
13:24
there listeners, it's hey there Delilah. And
13:28
we're here live trying to
13:30
get all your voice snails. And we're having
13:32
a good time. And we hope to make
13:34
you have a good time too. So
13:37
Ichabod, who do we have on
13:39
the horn? Because we have our community of
13:41
advice experts here today. Hi,
13:43
I'm Chip. Okay. So
13:48
nobody else introducing themselves. Come on, I'm hot. I guess
13:50
now I feel like an idiot. Chalice
13:52
has just gotten the craziest wave
13:54
of stage fright and she's like
13:57
looks blue. She, her arms
13:59
are shaking. She's. So scared. Let me tell
14:01
you guys, our community advice experts are
14:03
a little nervous, but I've been there.
14:06
The first five years I was on this show, I
14:09
was breaking out in hives, screaming,
14:11
pitching a little fit. Anytime I
14:13
got a little nervous, you might remember those episodes.
14:15
They want a few pea bodies for
14:18
journalism. Hey
14:20
there Delilah, it's me, a beef. Just,
14:23
you know, what was the things that helped
14:25
you overcome those, that hardship?
14:29
Get back into the game. I mean,
14:31
you're an elite top radio
14:34
of your field. Yeah, I'm
14:36
in the elite top radio of my field. Every
14:38
time before I record, I
14:41
kind of have my own little ritual. So
14:44
I go for what's called a little
14:46
aggro run, where I kind of
14:48
get all the juice out, so that I have
14:50
nothing left to scream for, you know what I
14:52
mean? I get it all
14:54
out, so I do a 5K, we're
14:57
coming into the office. I'm
14:59
also on a few little setties,
15:01
little sedatives. Kind of
15:04
take down the mood a little bit more, because
15:06
things can get anxiety inducing on this show. Someone
15:08
calls in with a war, I
15:11
have to respond to that. Yeah,
15:13
you're a journalist. I'm a journalist in
15:15
a way. Depending on what
15:17
they call in for, I have to
15:19
respond, there's no call I won't take,
15:21
you know that. God, so many hats
15:23
you wear Delilah. Hey, I'm Jennifer, and
15:25
I think I'm here because I'm a
15:28
chef. No, Jennifer,
15:30
Jennifer, you're running for mayor. You're
15:33
running for mayor, and we're the
15:35
campaign team. Incredible.
15:38
You know, it's pretty common for us to mix
15:40
politics and pleasure here at Hey There Delilah. So
15:43
let me ask you, what's going on with this
15:45
campaign? I don't know. Well.
15:50
Yeah, take it away, Granny. This is our
15:52
campaign granny. This is our campaign granny. It's
15:54
not always, it's sort of a
15:56
flexible title that we're sort of working on
15:58
where it's workshopping. It fits to me
16:01
from what I'm seeing, it seems apt.
16:04
Thank you. Thank you? Did you
16:06
mean to say thank you there too? No, I didn't. I
16:09
didn't, I didn't. So a couple
16:12
things. One, one time I
16:14
meant to call 911 and I called the show
16:16
and you walked me through giving someone the Heimlich.
16:18
Do you remember me? That
16:20
happens like literally so many times. Nevermind.
16:23
Do you remember the food item? If you remember
16:25
the food item, I might be able to help.
16:28
It was a full Christmas goose. And
16:30
it was beef. Yeah, it was beef.
16:32
It just happened a few times, but I'm glad
16:34
I watched it. You're okay, beef. You didn't suffer
16:37
damage. No, no, no, I just
16:39
honked it out like you. The goose was still
16:41
alive. And also beef did not
16:43
learn from that mistake at all. Shoo.
16:46
Second of all, as the campaign granny,
16:48
I can walk you through it. We
16:51
recently got badges from all sorts of
16:53
the niche groups around Frasier, getting their
16:55
endorsement. Rats
16:57
are back and Jennifer is promising that
16:59
sex is back on the menu, boys,
17:01
if she is voted to be mayor.
17:04
We're sick and tired of all these
17:06
rules and we bet you are too.
17:08
So vote this little rat to be
17:10
mayor. What do you got to lose?
17:13
Everything. Now,
17:17
I don't typically offer political
17:19
endorsements on this show. I more
17:21
give takes on wars and things
17:23
like that. What
17:27
would you say? Yeah, yeah. What would you
17:29
say your platform is, Jennifer?
17:33
Yes. So what she's trying
17:35
to say is she's gonna try to undo
17:37
some of these rules and make it fun
17:39
to live in Frasier again. Before
17:41
we could sink, we could gamble, we
17:44
could fuck. And now we can't do
17:46
that unless we're breaking the
17:48
rules. We might have to bleep that. Yeah, and
17:50
again, I can't really offer endorsements unless
17:52
you're thinking of, waging a war of some sort.
17:54
But as long as we're keeping in platform. Do
18:00
you pro war or against
18:02
the war? Well, what is
18:04
the war about? Good question.
18:07
Maybe let's take one of those voicenails.
18:09
Red flag, red flag, red flag, red
18:11
flag, red flag. And more with that,
18:13
right after our first voicenail. Delilah, if
18:16
it's okay with you, we will have
18:18
our first voicenail heard out loud. That's
18:20
incredible, sweetheart, thank you. And y'all see
18:22
a snail get placed on the table
18:25
in front of you, and it
18:27
kinda just, it scoots right along,
18:29
and this snail is distinctive. It's just about
18:32
the size of a regular snail, but it
18:34
has a gold luminescent shell
18:36
to it. And
18:39
its eyes are looking in two different directions,
18:42
and its mouth opens, and
18:44
it is immediately apparent that this
18:46
snail has an inherent ability to
18:49
mimic things that it's heard. So
18:52
a voice has put a message
18:54
into this snail, and the snail, upon opening
18:56
its mouth, will now deliver
18:59
the message. Hey
19:01
there Delilah, we host dinner parties
19:03
in our home with dear friends.
19:05
They always bring their little dog, but
19:08
never ask if it's okay with us.
19:11
When they're finished eating, the husband picks the
19:13
dog up onto his lap at the table.
19:16
I think it's unbelievably rude to have a
19:18
dog at the dinner table, am I wrong?
19:21
My husband and I are appalled, and don't know
19:23
how to approach them about it without ruining our
19:25
friendship. We are flabbergasted, though they
19:28
think this is right. What
19:30
do you suggest we do? This is
19:32
from, sincerely, We Don't Do Doggy.
19:36
Hey there Delilah, it's Delilah. Thank
19:38
you so much for calling, We
19:40
Don't Do Doggy. This
19:43
is a tough pickle. Honesty
19:45
is usually always the best policy, so
19:48
I would say confront your friend and confront him
19:50
hard. You're gonna wanna pick
19:52
a battle here, and if
19:54
you lose the friendship over it, to
19:58
begin with. What are you guys? I
20:01
think you just lose the dog. You
20:03
go to your friend's house, you open the back
20:05
door, dog gets loose, I think you're good to
20:07
go. Am I wrong here? No, that's definitely an
20:09
option. And in terms of losing the dog, if
20:11
you wanna go more of that subtle route, you
20:14
can do it in a few ways. You can dig
20:16
a hole in your backyard for the dog to fall
20:18
into and like kind of mid-dinner, you can
20:20
excuse yourself to go to the bathroom. That is way more subtle.
20:22
You're right. Go to the bathroom and
20:25
you can fill the hole and then
20:27
the dog will live in the hole and then they won't be at
20:29
the party. As someone that
20:31
has lived in a hole for quite some time,
20:33
it's nice to be invited to dinner from time
20:35
to time. Dogs are people
20:37
if you think about it hard enough. You
20:40
think the dog should go to dinner or
20:42
beef? Isn't that not what we were saying?
20:44
I'm saying leave the dog out of here. I'm
20:47
saying you lose the dog, no dogs at dinner.
20:49
I'm on this person's side. Maybe
20:52
beef and the dog can all go have
20:54
dinner together and the fancy people
20:56
can go have dinner and they
20:58
can go have this dinner party. Kind of almost like
21:00
a kids table and an adult table. Yeah, except it's
21:02
a kids hole. Well, we try not to, we have
21:04
to bleep out. You can't say kids hole on Hey
21:06
There's a Lila. So
21:08
we're gonna have to bleep that section out. Really? That's a huge part
21:10
of our campaign. Oh God. So
21:13
the way that this will work is after
21:16
y'all give advice every single time, I'm
21:18
gonna have one of you do
21:20
a wisdom check. Incredible. And
21:23
then if it beats
21:26
a 15, that's gonna go over really,
21:29
really well with the people of Frasier
21:32
and make them believe that Jennifer and
21:34
her team have the
21:37
right idea of how to solve problems. Anything
21:39
below that, it's gonna count against you.
21:42
You really wanna go, just have the majority
21:45
go in your favor to come out of
21:47
this experience with some momentum
21:49
and a positive impact for the campaign.
21:51
Incredible. Chip, why don't you give me
21:53
a wisdom check now to
21:55
see how this all went over.
21:58
Okay, that gotta be a 15. Gotta
22:00
beat a 15. Oh god. Oh god. Oh,
22:04
an eight. Okay, that does not do
22:06
it. I don't think that's gonna resonate. Telling them
22:09
to- The kids' hole? Do you? Wow!
22:12
How? Yeah,
22:15
that tracks. And
22:18
I think that's enough for that voice snail.
22:20
We're gonna move right along, if
22:23
that's okay with you, Delilah, to the next one.
22:25
Absolutely, sweetheart. Places
22:27
another snail onto the table and
22:29
removes the first one. And the
22:32
room is filled with another voice. Hey
22:34
there, Delilah. I
22:36
have three grandchildren who address me
22:39
as Mr. and
22:41
not as Grandpa. Although
22:43
it is true that I
22:45
was not in their lives growing up,
22:48
I was not a bad
22:50
or cruel influence. A
22:53
few years ago, I sent a
22:55
winter-tide gift, a large sack
22:58
of gold, to one of
23:00
these grandchildren and I quickly
23:03
received a nice thank you
23:05
card. But it was addressed, Dear
23:08
Mr. Demaris, I
23:10
was so angry that I never sent another
23:12
gift and haven't heard from them since. I'm
23:15
87 years old. How do
23:17
I become Grandpa before it is
23:19
too late? Sincerely, wannabe
23:22
Grandpa. Hey there,
23:24
Delilah. It's Delilah here at Cape Hute.
23:26
Thank you so much for calling wannabe
23:28
Grandpa. This is
23:30
a pickle, this is a pickle. To earn
23:32
someone's respect usually, you know,
23:36
in a family sometimes it just comes, which
23:38
would be nice, right? We'd all like to
23:40
respect for my families and our sisters maybe.
23:43
But what
23:45
you might need to do is find ways
23:47
to get the respect. So take
23:50
on a big position, I don't know, become
23:52
a military general. It's close
23:54
to war, how it was. She's
23:56
really pro-war. I won't say my stance on
23:59
war yet. But create a church
24:01
of some sort. Do something where you
24:03
become a giant position of power. And
24:06
if you're taller, the children will be
24:08
more afraid of you as well. And
24:11
maybe that could lead to some sort of respect. But let's go
24:13
to our community experts. What do you guys think? Counterpoint,
24:15
Delilah, if I may. Oh, whoa.
24:18
I would say, sir, count your
24:20
blessings that no one's calling you
24:22
grandpa and aging you when it's
24:24
not necessary to always age you.
24:27
Does your daughter think that? I
24:29
don't have a daughter. I am much too
24:31
young to even have a daughter. Oh, I
24:33
shouldn't assume women have daughters. It's bad. No
24:36
one is making eye contact with me or none of
24:38
my friends are looking at me in the eye. I'm
24:41
just saying, when you're young and you're
24:43
sprightly, it's nice. It's nice when
24:46
no one's calling you grandpa, grandma, or pointing out
24:48
your age in any way. Cause you're very young.
24:50
You still have lots of time to do things.
24:52
Jallis is opening a full bottle of wine, as
24:54
you say. Yeah. Also,
24:57
if you continue to be away
24:59
from your grandkids, you can keep all those sacks
25:01
of gold to yourself. I mean, doesn't that sound
25:03
nice? I'd rather be a mister with a bunch
25:06
of sacks of gold than a
25:08
grandpa with some empty pockets. Beef?
25:12
I say retaliate. Retaliate,
25:14
retaliate, retaliate. Call them, mister. Yeah, call
25:16
them or have them come to your
25:18
house, wear a mask that's f***ed
25:21
up looking until midnight. And then when you
25:23
pass away and they take the mask off,
25:25
that's what they look like. That's
25:28
what they look like. Yeah, I didn't fall that
25:30
either. Retaliate, retaliate,
25:32
retaliate. Beef, why don't you
25:34
give me a wisdom check
25:36
to see how this one went.
25:40
Aliate. Oh,
25:42
15. Oh, 15. Oh, 15. Meets
25:46
it, pizza. Yeah,
25:48
come on. Meets it, pizza, pizza. Pizza,
25:51
pizza, pizza. Ah! Yeah,
25:53
pizza, pizza. Wait,
25:56
everyone do their pizza, pizza. Pizza, pizza, pizza,
25:58
pizza. Oh, did you not want them? all
26:00
at the same time so they're illegible. And
26:03
then we'll put it in a poll. Okay. All
26:08
right, excellent. And I'm going to take that
26:11
slug. Jesus, no, it's not a slug, it's
26:13
a snail. The snail off
26:15
the table. I thought you had perfect vision.
26:18
I can't wait, I. He
26:21
has perfect vision, but shell, he can't
26:24
see shell. Yes. At
26:28
the beach, he's a mess. He's
26:31
tripping all over the place. That might be my favorite line
26:34
of the season. At the beach, he's
26:36
a mess. Okay, unfortunately
26:38
I need that on a pillow. I'm so sorry, this
26:40
is Aaron talking and someone send me a pillow that
26:42
says that. This is Elizabeth talking, I'm going to need
26:44
that as well. You know how you're
26:47
always taking your assistant to the beach? Well, not this
26:49
assistant. Yeah, not this one.
26:51
Please never again, man. Please never
26:53
again. We
26:57
are in the age of subscriptions. And
27:00
sometimes I like to try to work
27:03
the system a little bit in a way
27:05
that's fair to everybody, which is a free
27:07
trial. And then I go, okay, at
27:10
the end of this free trial, I'm going to put it on my calendar.
27:12
And if I like it, I keep with it.
27:14
If I don't, it's out of here. But sometimes
27:17
I just straight up forget and then the subscriptions
27:19
pile up and I keep paying
27:21
for them when I don't even remember that
27:23
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27:25
common. Please tell me it's common. Which begs
27:27
the question, how much do you think you're
27:29
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up today. And
29:05
then this new snail eyes
29:07
looking in different directions, mouth opens and a new
29:09
voice fills the room. Hey
29:12
there, Delilah. Any suggestions
29:14
on how to motivate a husband?
29:17
We've been happily married for 35 years. Now
29:20
he does nothing. Now he
29:23
does nothing but read. Eat
29:26
and sleep. I'm not
29:28
exaggerating. He started reading about 15 years ago
29:30
when our boys were teenagers with
29:32
an active parent and a modestly successful
29:35
merchant of rare potions. But
29:37
then he discovered fan fiction, free stories
29:39
hidden in the library, written by unpublished
29:42
authors. And he now reads 16 to
29:45
18 hours a day on weekends,
29:47
plus 10 hours each day during the week.
29:50
What do I do? Also, he's a
29:52
worm. Sincerely, wife to
29:54
a bookworm. Hey
29:56
there, Delilah. This is Delilah from K-PEW.
29:59
Thank you. so much for calling. I
30:02
may have lost a sister to reading. Oh,
30:05
Delilah, no. No. RIP. Well,
30:08
she's alive. She's just, she's
30:12
always reading. Doesn't have time
30:14
for anybody anymore, you know? God, it makes me
30:16
mad thinking about it. Ha ha ha ha.
30:19
Anyway, chill out. Chill out, chill
30:21
out. Hey, chill out. Chill
30:23
out, girl, chill out. Uh-oh. Oh.
30:26
Chill out, girl, chill out. So
30:28
I have to... Oh, God. It's
30:31
self-soothing. It's self-soothing. It's self-soothing. We have to
30:33
self-soothe. We go on an agro-run and we
30:35
take our little settees in the
30:37
morning. So I understand what it's like
30:39
to lose a loved one to reading. You
30:41
can try all you want. You can dump the
30:44
books down the sink. You can
30:46
take them to meetings. You can
30:49
try to scald their eyeballs while they're sleeping.
30:52
It seems like it's an unstoppable force once they
30:54
want to read. And I
30:56
just say cut it off now. Cut
30:58
it off now. You may have lost him
31:00
for good and you don't need to hurt
31:03
yourself in the process.
31:06
What do we think, community? I
31:08
have some advice. I have some
31:10
advice for the wife of a doerm. What's
31:13
your advice for the wife of the doerm? If
31:15
you want your husband to pay attention
31:17
to you, write a fucking book. Write
31:21
a book about yourself and your
31:23
love. Write your love story. Chill
31:25
out, girl. Chill out, girl. What?
31:27
Beef, what are you even saying? I can barely hear
31:29
you. Just say, chill out, girl. Chill out, girl. What?
31:32
You've got to chill out, girl. You've got to
31:34
chill out, girl. If you want him to even
31:36
remember, then you should write the
31:39
story of your love and then he'll read
31:41
that and then he'll, is that one familiar?
31:43
And then he'll come back. Tails
31:47
is opening another body point. I
31:49
just will say in response to that as
31:51
a significant other, sometimes people
31:54
don't have time to read people's manuscripts
31:56
because they're long and they don't really
31:58
have a great plot. because they're
32:00
not interested in reading a
32:03
manuscript. It's so good, Chip. Crack it
32:05
open, give it a shot. I am
32:07
begging you. But I feel like
32:09
for, you know, if this wife were to write
32:11
a book, she should let him after
32:14
10 pages, if he's not interested, he should be allowed
32:16
to put the book down. It's exposition,
32:18
it's not even the plot yet. I'm
32:20
setting up the world, world building. Okay,
32:23
I think we're gonna need to move on here. Just
32:27
call it last word of advice. Your reading
32:29
is the gateway drug to knowledge, so... Just,
32:32
you have to distance yourself from this. She
32:34
might, she might... Sorry, I mean, your husband.
32:37
Yeah, that's a pro-war thing to say. Villainizing
32:39
knowledge like that, my God. We don't
32:41
know my stance on war yet. So
32:46
just protect yourself, Kale. Wow.
32:48
I mean, can I just say, Delilah, it's just amazing
32:50
to watch you work. It's
32:54
mind-blowing how you can really untangle
32:57
these necklaces of dire
32:59
need. Thank you, Beef, that's really
33:02
kind. Nobody really notices my work
33:05
ethic around here. I mean, besides all the benefits
33:07
and the promotions and things I get, but nobody
33:10
says, you know, they're so intimidated
33:13
by the Delilah image.
33:16
Aura. Aura, that they, I don't
33:18
know, sometimes they get nervous to talk to me. I
33:21
mean, I would love to get a drink if we can... Well,
33:23
Beef, we're on the air, so this is a heads up. All
33:27
right, and for this one, Chalice,
33:29
why don't you give me a
33:31
wisdom check here? Oh!
33:36
It's not so bad advice after
33:38
all. It's not so bad advice
33:40
after all. It's not
33:42
so bad advice after all, everybody. We've
33:45
got two that really resonate with people in one, not
33:47
so much as far as your response is just to...
33:49
I don't get it. I
33:52
have to say, guys, your advice
33:54
has been pretty consistent. I feel
33:56
like I could give you
33:59
guys an endorsement. if
34:01
your advice goes well, I mean, but if
34:03
you have any snags, I don't know if
34:05
I'd feel comfortable in parsing. Well, from heads
34:07
forth, we shall have no snags. Delilah,
34:09
we're going to do a few
34:11
more. So here's a new snail,
34:15
and he's opening his mouth, okay, great. Hey
34:18
there, Delilah. I am a
34:20
dwarf. I'm 75 years old,
34:23
happily married for 45 years. We
34:26
are in good health. We
34:28
have two kids who are both
34:30
lovely, but my problem
34:33
is I have bad dreams. Sometimes
34:36
they even border on nightmares,
34:38
and I don't understand why. If
34:41
I have 100 dreams, 99 are bad. Two
34:44
nights ago, I woke up screaming from one of
34:46
them. Ah! I
34:48
have no stress. We are financially
34:50
secure, and life is good. I've
34:53
spoken to two professionals about this, and there
34:55
are no answers to my problem. Have
34:57
you heard of this, and have you any advice? Sincerely,
35:01
Sleepless in the Adel by the Sea.
35:05
Hey there, Delilah. Thank you so much for the Delilah from
35:07
Cape Ew. Thank you so much for
35:09
calling Sleepless in the... It's confusing every time. It's
35:11
getting wrong. And what's wrong is it's so
35:13
confusing that she calls them Delilah. Thank
35:17
you for calling Sleepless in whatever. That
35:19
is... She doesn't even know what their name is.
35:21
She says her name. The pills, the
35:23
sedatives are really kicking in right now. Do, do,
35:26
do, do, do. That's quite a big girl. Here's
35:30
my thought. You say you have
35:32
an incredible life. You're
35:34
very happily married, and you have a good family life,
35:37
a good happy relationships
35:39
with friends, and you feel good
35:41
all the time. Have you considered... You're having
35:43
nightmares because you're bragging. You're
35:46
bragging quite a lot. Because
35:48
some of us don't have that. And
35:51
maybe you're unintentionally making the people around you
35:54
feel quite bad. And
35:57
perhaps the nightmares... Calm down, girl. Chill
36:00
out, chill out, chill out, chill out. Chill out, chill out, chill
36:02
out, chill out, chill out. You gotta chill girl, chill girl,
36:04
chill girl. You gotta chill?
36:07
You gotta, you gotta, gotta, gotta, too girl. But
36:12
the advice stands, perhaps the nightmares are
36:14
kind of karmic punishment for
36:16
sort of bragging about how well adjusted you
36:18
are. It's not
36:20
perfect science, but it could be true. So
36:23
take a poll of all the people around you, and
36:25
if they're sort of jealous of how
36:27
nice you are, take a poll and see if maybe
36:29
that's what's leading to all your hellish
36:32
nightmares. Community
36:34
advice experts, what do you think? I'm
36:37
pointing out something that's sort of tangential
36:39
here. On
36:41
the menu for the lunch we're eating
36:43
after this is like a ton of
36:45
escargot, and I'm wondering, are those the
36:47
same snails that are the voice snails?
36:49
Oh, and they're going straight to the
36:51
burner. Yeah, are these the snails that
36:53
we eat in like an hour? Well,
36:57
the snails only have one message, so it
36:59
would be sort of silly to keep them.
37:01
I don't wanna give advice on
37:03
the same messages. We're kind of
37:05
a no-waste facility. We eat all
37:08
the cups and the plates and stuff. We eat, we
37:10
don't throw any of that so hard. I
37:12
did have a plate that was delicious in
37:15
the waiting room, yeah. Good, good, good, good,
37:17
good, good, good, good. So yeah,
37:19
those snails will be lunch, unless
37:22
you'd prefer plates or something. Okay, it looks like
37:24
it's news to this snail. This snail
37:26
looked like he thought he was going home. Sorry.
37:32
I think maybe just sleep less. And
37:35
that's all we have time for for that one. Chip,
37:38
you wanna roll a wisdom check for that? On
37:40
sleep less. Yeah. Just
37:42
sleep less. You should kind of be in
37:45
a waking nightmare, not a sleeping nightmare. Oh,
37:47
19! Hey! Oh,
37:50
baby! Perfect advice. Yaboo!
37:55
So it's three to one, as
37:57
far as ones that have resonated and ones that haven't.
37:59
So, yeah. You're very close to
38:01
an Endorci. Oh,
38:03
that would be huge. And
38:06
now, of course, is the time
38:08
in the show Delilah, where we
38:10
get to dip into some of
38:12
the voice snails that we haven't
38:14
gotten to get into from the
38:17
past. So our archives. Our
38:19
archives. Our archives, beautiful.
38:22
Very exciting. Here we go.
38:24
The snail is placed onto the table.
38:27
It scoots forward. You're dead if you
38:29
speak. Yeah. You're
38:32
dead if you speak. You're lunch if you speak. It
38:35
starts shaking. I'd hold on to it.
38:39
And a voice fills the room,
38:41
and it is a familiar voice.
38:45
It's actually the voice of
38:47
Chip. Oh,
38:50
no. Hey there, Delilah. I've
38:54
been having trouble with a
38:56
couple of my housemates lately.
39:00
I'm starting to get a waft of
39:02
a smell that comes from each of
39:04
their rooms independently that is starting to,
39:06
I guess the best thing to say
39:08
is burn my nose hairs. I'm
39:11
curious if you have what you've
39:13
done to taking care of smelly
39:15
roommates. Maybe those that take a
39:17
magazine based on a sandwich and do dirty things
39:19
with it or something like that. Love.
39:23
Oh, god, don't say love you. Thank you
39:25
so much for listening. How
39:28
do I stop this thing? How do I stop it?
39:30
Then you got to say like your
39:32
pseudonym or whatever. Oh, OK. OK. Chip,
39:36
did you say something? No, Challah. Sorry.
39:38
One sec. Hold on. From
39:42
sexy guy. Ow, my
39:45
ass. The snail closes
39:47
its mouth. Hey there,
39:49
Delilah. It's Delilah from KP talking
39:51
to Chip and your archives. No,
39:53
that wasn't. What do you mean? I'm
39:56
Chip. It sounded just like you. I didn't even need
39:58
the pseudonym. I didn't need the pseudonym. and it sounded
40:00
just like you. I don't think so. You're
40:02
having a problem with smelly roommates or is this a
40:05
problem that's since passed? Tell
40:07
us and be for looking at it. Unblinking,
40:10
unblinking. Hypothetically,
40:13
let's say that it's still happening.
40:15
Well, there's a couple of things you can do if you have
40:17
smelly housemates. So one, you
40:20
can, you know, this would be
40:22
taking it upon yourself, but you make a nice
40:24
little batch of cinnamon rolls and you place
40:26
it in their rooms every morning, hide it, hide
40:28
it so that they don't... Find it, but then their rooms kind
40:31
of smell like cinnamon rolls and it's kind of nice that there's
40:33
a smell coming. There's no chance Beef Can't
40:35
doesn't find these cinnamon rolls. Yeah, fine.
40:37
I'll find that. That
40:40
is his one skill set. Hey,
40:42
they're Delilah. What
40:44
if your roommate,
40:46
one of them, is he's
40:50
commandeering the main space and
40:53
so you have to kind of
40:56
live in your room because he
40:58
said he's working on a project
41:00
for his manuscript. You're writing
41:03
a what? Well,
41:05
you know, in case it comes up, it'd be nice
41:08
to have a manuscript like a
41:10
maybe top and different manuscript. Wow.
41:13
I can't in good
41:15
my religion faith kind
41:18
of give advice on writing a
41:20
book. So you're faithful. I'm
41:22
a faithful. I'm not a traitor. I'm
41:25
a faithful. OK,
41:27
I guess my big advice to the
41:30
sexy guy, whatever his name was, is
41:32
whoever think did stink did it. And
41:35
if you're smelling a bad smell, I think
41:38
it was probably you. So my big advice
41:40
is take a bath and see if things
41:42
improve. Yeah, dude, I agree
41:44
with Challis, dude. It's probably
41:46
you. Let's move on. Take a
41:48
bath. You stinky guy. Challis,
41:51
why don't you give a wisdom
41:53
roll here? Oh, God. Oh,
41:55
so we are at
41:57
three and. It's
42:00
getting close now. So that means
42:02
Chip did not take this advice
42:05
at all. Yeah,
42:07
yeah. I don't approve
42:09
of your advice. You do not like the advice
42:11
that, by the way, you tagged. You like ended
42:14
with the giving advice. Chip
42:16
and Chalice are doing that look that couples do,
42:18
where they're like, we're going to fight about this
42:20
later in the
42:22
privacy of our own home. I'm
42:25
adding this to my manuscript. I'm
42:27
adding it to my manuscript. Speaking of stink, you guys
42:29
kind of stunk that piece of advice up. I don't
42:31
know. We're kind of neck and neck in terms of
42:33
bad versus good advice. Oh, God. This
42:36
endorsement of Jennifer is sort of wavering here.
42:39
Guys, get it together, or I'm never going to
42:41
be chef. Oh, God. Can
42:43
we get another snail out here? We need to
42:45
move on, please. Of course, of course. Right here,
42:48
and here's a snail, and it's opening its mouth.
42:51
And a familiar voice fills
42:53
the room. Beef. What
42:56
does this voicemail? Sound like? Where
43:01
am I? Where
43:11
am I? I
43:13
don't feel good. I think I
43:16
ate too much. Oh,
43:21
God, I ate too much of so full. That
43:23
is so full. Chalice, Chip,
43:25
so full. Beef, did you
43:27
say something? No,
43:30
come here. No, come in here. I'm coming
43:32
in. No, don't come in. Don't come
43:34
in. I'm so full. I'm so
43:37
full. Oh, hello?
43:44
Hello? Uh-oh. Hello?
43:48
Oh, no. Hey,
43:50
I'm full. I'm going
43:52
for something on the other end. Sorry.
43:57
Uh, love you? I mean, why'd I
43:59
say that? Thank you, bye. And
44:01
the snail closes its mouth. Well,
44:03
no pseudonym there, but B if that sounded like
44:05
you. Now,
44:08
is this a problem that is ongoing? Are you
44:10
still full or did that end up shorting itself
44:13
out sort of later the day? That
44:15
is sort of like a butt dial. Yeah,
44:19
I think I'm embarrassed. I'm
44:22
embarrassed. No, no. That
44:25
was a butt dial. I had no idea. You don't need
44:27
to be embarrassed. Listen,
44:30
there are very few things people should be embarrassed
44:32
about. There are some, but that's not one
44:34
of them. You know, having
44:36
mental health or stomach health issues, nothing
44:38
to be embarrassed about. Yeah,
44:41
no stomach health issues, just
44:43
very full. Yeah, wasn't that the day the
44:45
vending machine broke and you decided
44:47
to take advantage? I said, let's do it
44:49
all. Well, you know,
44:51
it's interesting that you bring that up because there
44:53
are procedures that can be done. You
44:56
can have more mouths inserted so that you
44:58
have more places to put the food. Hey,
45:01
Delilah. Hey, Delilah. Wheat.
45:04
Sorry, we've been trying to keep that
45:06
information away from beef. We
45:09
do. Beef is the last
45:11
person that needs to know that you could put more
45:13
mouths all over your body. Beef looks like chalice.
45:15
Wait, you can do that? No, beef, it's
45:17
a joke. It's very common in Frasier. One
45:19
of the best talk show hosts here that
45:22
isn't me actually has three mouths. So they
45:24
can actually host three shows at once. Well,
45:27
you know how people get like too much
45:29
plastic surgery and you're like wondering what happened?
45:31
Beef will be mostly mouth if you continue
45:33
to speak. Well, let me tell you, this
45:35
Niles guy is hot as hell and
45:38
he has got three mouths and he's looking good.
45:41
So think about it. I will.
45:44
I got some advice for beef, I guess.
45:47
Yeah, chalice, beef turns 380. Yeah,
45:50
chalice, what is it? Well, you're you're spending
45:52
too much. That's a
45:54
little too much. Done. You were facing
45:56
me and now you're sort of just a skew. A skew? A
45:59
little bit. a little bit of stew. Yeah. So
46:03
my advice is if you're sick for meeting
46:05
all the vending machine food in one go,
46:07
let your friends in the room so they
46:09
can help you. And share it. Both,
46:12
either. Let your friends in to
46:14
either share the food or to help you pick up the
46:16
pieces when you've eaten all of the food. Well, and I'll
46:18
say this be a good thing. Save an Oreo for a
46:20
guy. If you're going to save an Oreo for
46:22
a guy, make sure the guy is worth it. Make sure
46:25
the guy or girl is freaking worth it. Or a person
46:27
is freaking worth it. Because you don't want to be giving
46:29
Oreos to some freaking. Uh-oh.
46:31
Something happened to Zoila. Witch.
46:34
Yeah. Uh-oh. A pervert witch.
46:37
Whoa, there's a story there talking about
46:40
a pervert witch. Who takes your Oreo
46:42
and then leaves to go read
46:44
on the weekend. And she
46:47
has a cute husband. And
46:50
she doesn't have sister time anymore. You
46:53
got to chill out. Oh, it's a sister again.
46:55
You got to chill out. My
46:58
advice. Delilah, you got to chill out. You
47:02
got any more of those snails? What
47:05
chalice roll? Oh, yeah, we got to roll. Yeah,
47:08
chalice, can you roll for wisdom? 13
47:10
plus 2. Ooh. Beef
47:15
looks at chalice and he goes, you're right. You're
47:18
barely right. Yeah, yeah,
47:20
yeah. You just became right. Yeah,
47:23
you're barely right, chalice. You're
47:25
looking sort of right next to me, beef.
47:27
Look me and the eye. I just
47:29
wanted one Oreo. Another
47:32
snail is placed onto
47:34
the table. And
47:37
you actually hear a familiar voice.
47:39
And it sounds like everyone give me
47:42
a perception check real quick. 7,
47:44
10, 14,
47:46
6. So no one really
47:49
recognizes this voice right off the bat.
47:52
Hello, I'm Stephanie
47:55
Boone. And I've
47:57
been having a little bit of a pickle.
48:00
I feel like everybody thinks my brother
48:03
is a really cool hotshot, but
48:06
I would like to make it
48:08
known he's actually a huge arsehole.
48:11
And I want to kind of
48:13
galvanize the public around a bad
48:15
sibling. How would I
48:17
best do that? And could I
48:19
use the airwaves right now to
48:21
gauge interest in galvanizing behind a
48:23
bad sibling and getting them voted
48:25
out of Frasier, maybe
48:28
sent into the ocean or into a
48:30
kid hole? Now,
48:33
if I could just publicize that need and
48:35
if you want to toss in some advice,
48:38
that would be great. Sincerely,
48:42
Daphne Moon. And
48:44
this now closes its mouth. Hmm.
48:47
Hey there, Delilah, this is Delilah, this is
48:49
Delilah. See, now that was the only time
48:51
that Hey there, Delilah might actually be appropriate.
48:54
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, this is a kip-kip-kip-hoot. Wow,
48:57
what an interesting conundrum. It's
48:59
a pretty, it's among the toughest problems one
49:01
can have is to have a bad sibling
49:04
that people like that you think everybody should
49:06
know actually stinks. For example,
49:08
if your sibling was named Sam
49:10
and you wanted to say they stunk
49:13
to their whole friend group so that
49:15
the whole friend group knows and doesn't
49:17
keep saying good things about her, I
49:20
would find that hard to do unless I had a
49:22
radio show. So I
49:24
can really sympathize with that. Now I say,
49:26
I don't know, you shouldn't be allowed to
49:28
be bad. Amen. They shouldn't be punished.
49:30
Well, you know, but you know, if
49:32
I may, Delilah, as siblings,
49:35
you know, you actually have
49:37
a teammate if you really kind of
49:39
flip the perspective on here, not an
49:41
enemy, someone that
49:44
could work with you. And,
49:46
you know, it's someone that has a shared experience
49:48
with you, the only one, because they're the only
49:50
one that has the same mom and dad as
49:52
you. Even if they
49:54
have more of a
49:57
long neck and nicer
49:59
little body, bird-like feathers and sort
50:01
of a ruse your little
50:04
bird-like rump. Yeah, I
50:06
mean, if it's your brother. I
50:08
will say I'm pretty anti-sibling as somebody that
50:10
doesn't, famously doesn't get along with his siblings.
50:13
What I've noticed in a way that I was
50:15
alienated was they came up with a nickname for
50:17
me that I didn't care for at the time.
50:20
And I think maybe this caller could do
50:22
something very similar. Hold on, writing this
50:24
down. Yeah, she's, she's
50:27
taking both her hands, putting a- Both
50:29
her little wings. Yeah, both her wings. She's
50:31
putting it together and holding it. Penn
50:34
is in the middle of her wings and she's-
50:36
I think the pills are really hitting because this
50:38
looks kind of like nonsense. Oh, she's drawing. She's
50:40
not writing, she's drawing. Her eyes
50:42
are crossed. I
50:45
don't think she's here. I don't think any
50:47
time soon. Hey there. Hey there,
50:49
Delilah. Hey there, Delilah. And we're back.
50:52
Did that advice take? So yeah, let's
50:54
have, um, Beef, do you want to give me
50:56
a wisdom check? Eight. Okay.
50:59
And then just take the drawing that Delilah
51:01
did of Sami, says Stinky Sammi. I
51:03
go, no, she's stinky. She's
51:06
f- she's f-f-f-f- strife. Stinky. You
51:08
know what? You know your life better
51:10
than me. Hands
51:13
up by surrender, you know. I mean, my brother
51:15
tried to marry me. Not all siblings are great.
51:17
If my sister tries, she wishes she could pull
51:19
me. And
51:23
just for you players, you should know that we're
51:26
at four yesses and three nos right now, as
51:28
far as how they've gone over. And
51:31
this is the final snail that's now on the table. You
51:33
can either come out with some good momentum or
51:36
kind of just have it be a net neutral. Or
51:38
if it goes really bad, we'll say under
51:41
ten, then it's a
51:43
negative on the whole overall. But
51:47
the snail opens its mouth. Hi.
51:50
Long time listener for
51:52
some caller. I
51:55
am actually headed out the door to
51:57
go on a radio show. to
52:00
endorse my friend Jennifer for the campaign
52:02
she's running for mayor and feeling
52:05
a little nervous it's also everyone I'm with is
52:07
I'm sensing they're a little nervous. Should I wear
52:09
this bow tie? Nobody's gonna
52:11
see any of you. Jennifer's
52:14
day drinking, beef is wearing a
52:16
bow tie and I'm just
52:18
wondering it like how do you sort of chill
52:21
out in the face of pressure like how do you
52:24
not get nervous and drink I don't know like three
52:26
bottles of wine when you get there to chill out.
52:28
Love you, sincerely nervous
52:31
to be on the radio.
52:33
I have a car! Hey
52:36
there de la la this is de la la
52:38
from KP you're talking to hey there de la la
52:40
fans thank you so
52:42
much for calling in. He keeps getting
52:44
longer every time. Thank you for
52:46
calling nervous to be on the radio. This
52:49
is actually something I know quite a bit about and
52:52
I use an acronym that I
52:56
paid very expensive mentor
52:58
to teach me which is just
53:00
cog chill out girl
53:04
at the end of the day if that doesn't work and you're still pretty
53:06
pissed by the end of the day go outside
53:08
her house go outside her
53:10
house stick a ton of forks in her lawn
53:17
spray pesticide on her her grasses
53:21
maybe I don't know it slowly
53:23
take little items out of
53:26
her garage so she feels she's going insane
53:28
yeah I could I could take a shot at this
53:30
de la la if that's all right. Absolutely. Chalice
53:33
is holding de la la's head up at this
53:35
point. It's become so heavy from
53:38
the pill. To
53:43
whomever the I
53:45
this is obviously my first time on the radio and
53:47
I came into this nervous but I will say that
53:50
the one thing that helped me was having
53:53
my best friends in the world beside
53:55
me supporting me I know
53:58
sometimes People don't have
54:00
time to read manuscripts, but
54:03
just know that the people beside you promise
54:06
that they're going to read it when they
54:08
get home right away. I don't know if
54:10
that helps you, whoever's calling, but just know
54:12
that that's the case. Yeah, I
54:14
bet it does help whoever's calling.
54:18
Yeah, I'd probably say
54:20
get the dog and the kids home. See
54:23
what happens. You have to bleep that out, bleep that out. That's the time
54:25
code is at one hour 14. Bleep that out. But
54:28
on the whole, on the kids
54:30
whole, I agree. Bleep that out
54:32
too, one hour 14. And
54:35
let's have, we'll have Chip roll a wisdom
54:37
check here. Okay, I wish I
54:39
had more than plus zero for my wisdom. So,
54:41
but remember, the stakes are high in this one.
54:44
Over 15, it's a yes, and
54:46
under a 10 is two noes. No,
54:48
we'll leave. I
54:50
did botch. No! Yep,
54:55
that's two noes. Can
54:58
he roll with advantage? Cause chalice would have liked
55:00
that advice. That was good advice. So
55:02
here's the thing, here's the thing. And I
55:04
would, do you want to point this out?
55:06
Chalice would like that advice. We're not saying
55:08
what chalice or the individual, it's how the
55:10
advice resonates with the listening public. And
55:13
for whatever reason, they were just
55:15
not feeling that answer. They're like,
55:17
manuscript, what did that have to do?
55:19
It's not gonna do anything. Friendship. People
55:24
are really mad these days. That was
55:26
a really good answer, Chip. Friends, people.
55:28
Yeah, but it's not a big culture
55:30
fit for Frasier. It's just
55:33
a culture thing. Me
55:35
and isolated sort of here. You know what, I'm
55:37
proud as long as it resonated with the people in this room. That's
55:39
all I care about. F*** you, listeners. Hey,
55:43
hey. Yeah, f*** you, listeners. Yeah,
55:45
f*** you, listeners. Okay, you
55:47
guys, I just really don't think at this
55:49
point I can give you a solid endorsement
55:51
of Jennifer as a chef or anything else.
55:54
You like war anyway, I don't know
55:56
if we want to. Well, I didn't really officially release that
55:58
yet. That's gonna be, that's gonna be... going to be the
56:00
special thousandth episode is what I think of
56:02
war. Is you talking about how much you
56:04
like war? I didn't release what I think
56:06
about it yet. Yes, I will. I
56:10
will be tuning into that episode. That
56:12
does sound like a good episode. It
56:14
is pending. You don't know it. I
56:16
am still working out the nuance of
56:18
my day. Or you
56:20
can't discern it. If you try to listen to
56:22
the previous episodes where I give my takes on
56:24
more and I give advice towards you
56:27
will not discern my take. Sorry, I
56:29
was just looking at the coffee table and notice
56:31
that there's a scroll that says Delilah's manifesto on
56:33
war. I
56:36
haven't touched the eyes or crossed the T's. It's
56:39
a weird thing to wait till the end. I'm
56:42
springing these snails. Let's get out of
56:44
here. Let's scream. Hey, my voice moves.
56:46
Snails. What a weird day, huh?
56:50
Go, you're free. And they're literally slugging
56:52
out and snailing out so slow. And
56:55
they're just getting like trampled on by people. Cape,
56:58
your team lunch is running away. You better
57:01
go get some. And that's
57:03
all we have time for today.
57:05
I'm hey there, Delilah. Tune in
57:07
tomorrow. Same time, same place. Have
57:10
a good one, Frazier. Bye there,
57:12
Delilah. Sitcom
57:23
D&D is comprised of Elizabeth Andrews, Ben
57:25
Briggs, Aaron Keefe, Philippe Mansour and Mishaan
57:28
Koil. Arne Perre wrote the theme song.
57:30
Walid and I worked out the story
57:32
concept and Sean Moore did the editing
57:34
on this one. And of course, we
57:36
were joined by the wickedly talented Rekha
57:38
Shankar. You can follow Rekha
57:40
on Instagram at Rekha underscore S to
57:42
get more Rekha-centric content in your life.
57:45
Rekha also had a new sketch come
57:48
out called Dad Econ that you can
57:50
find on all her socials at rekhashankar.com.
57:53
And she's also in the newest season of Dimension
57:55
20. Never Stop Blowing
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58:53
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59:01
And finally, if you want to keep up with the gang, you can follow
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that's sitcom, and then the letters D
59:07
and D. Okay, I
59:09
think that's it for now. Until next Tuesday,
59:11
and thanks as always for listening. F***
59:26
you, listeners.
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