0:01

Hey, viewers, Sniffy's Cruising Confessions

0:03

is an explicit podcast about queer sex,

0:05

filter dirty words, and unfiltered descriptions

0:08

of sexual activities. If hearing about

0:10

orgies, anonymous sex, kink,

0:12

fetish, and more offends your sensibilities,

0:15

you might want to skip this Viewer discretion

0:17

is advised. It's definitely not for kids.

0:21

Hi. Everyone, today's episode is

0:23

all about sex work, which is illegal

0:25

in most of the United States, and because of this

0:27

criminalization, sex workers face

0:29

discrimination in nearly every aspect

0:31

of our society. Sniffy's Chris

0:34

Xavier and I don't agree with this state

0:36

of affairs, and that's why we're doing this episode

0:38

to help destigmatize sex work. But

0:41

because sex work is illegal, we want

0:43

to make it clear that this show is for entertainment

0:45

purposes only, and we are not officially

0:47

recommending that anyone follow the advice offered

0:49

in this episode. Sex work isn't a

0:51

profession to enter into lightly, and hiring

0:53

sex workers is also legal in most of the US,

0:56

so please be aware of this while listening.

0:59

Okay, game Cruising Combession

1:01

time. Do you remember

1:03

learning about paying for sex

1:05

or being paid for sex?

1:07

I do, so I grew up in Florida,

1:09

and there was a street called Obt Orange

1:11

Blossom Trail, Okay, And every time we

1:13

drove by it at

1:16

night, my mom would be like, that's that's where the whoors

1:18

work. I grew up Catholic.

1:20

Her word's not mine, her word's not mine,

1:23

and so I always had a very like stigmatized

1:26

understanding of sex work. And then later

1:28

when I moved to New York, one of my very first jobs in

1:30

the city was actually editing for a porn company,

1:33

and I had never thought of porn performers as

1:35

sex workers either, But as I started making friends

1:37

in the industry, a lot of folks

1:40

identify as sex workers, whether they just

1:42

film porn, whether they were escorts,

1:45

performers, OnlyFans, content

1:47

creators, which started happening shortly after

1:49

I started working in the industry. So I

1:52

think I have a much broader understanding of sex

1:55

work now, and working

1:58

to get

2:00

rid of that stigma that I was raised with was

2:02

also something that I think I had to work with personally,

2:05

because I have had lovers and friends

2:07

where sex workers have gone on dates with folks or sex

2:09

workers, and I think they experience of hesitancy

2:12

telling me about their work. Yes, and I'm like, you

2:14

don't have to know. I'm not a

2:16

twelve year old Catholic anymore.

2:18

We're good, We're good.

2:19

Yeah. So it's been a learning experience. I'm lucky that

2:21

I've had people teach me. How about

2:24

you, what's your experience been with sex work?

2:25

Oh gosh, So I

2:27

did sex work for about ten years. Oh wow.

2:30

It started when I was about fourteen

2:32

or fifteen. I was homeless and

2:35

it was in means of survival im Portland, where

2:37

I grew up. There was a lot of queer

2:39

youth who were homeless and we sort of all banded

2:41

together and my first

2:44

night out with them, they were like, let's

2:47

go to this corner. This is where we get our johns.

2:49

And I was like, not really sure what was going on.

2:52

The sky pulls up in a BMW. All my

2:54

friends are like running to the car and

2:57

he and I'm like standing in the background sort of like what

2:59

is happening? And he pointed at

3:01

me and I was like what

3:05

what you want me? And

3:07

then yeah, that was sort of how it started. And over

3:09

the years like it, you know, I started doing

3:11

Craigslist and rim Boy and Ritman,

3:14

and I really leaned

3:16

into being an escort. A lot of my clients

3:19

were not sex based. You

3:21

know, at the time, I spoke for languages, I had a valid

3:23

passport, I look good in a tux. So I

3:26

was doing lots of dinners, lots of gallas,

3:28

lots of like boyfriend experiences, and

3:32

I made a lot of money.

3:34

Oh sure you did, babe,

3:36

I'm sure you did.

3:38

And I spent it on clothes. Yes,

3:41

yes, well that's what's funny.

3:43

You know, so many sex workers I've spoken to are like, sex

3:46

is part of the job, but it's surprisingly not

3:48

as common as you might think. Some folks want to have a conversation,

3:50

yes, some folks need companies, some folks want the boyfriend

3:53

experience.

3:54

Yes.

3:54

So yeah, it's very very interesting broad

3:56

spectrum of work.

3:57

Yeah, and it's interesting now now

4:00

that I like, go go dance, like some people would

4:02

like say that that is sex work, and

4:05

like, to some extent it kind of

4:07

is because I am sort of like offering my

4:09

body in this thing in exchange for money. I'm

4:13

like, yeah, I don't know. I think that the culture around sex work

4:15

has really changed, and I think it's like broadened a

4:18

little bit in terms of like instead of just being

4:20

like a porn performer or someone

4:22

who you know has sex for money. It

4:25

has gotten a lot broader.

4:26

Yeah, And there's so many ways to exchange

4:29

sex for money, whether you're doing it

4:31

for survival, whether you're doing it to just try it out. Yes,

4:33

And I think removing that stigma makes

4:35

it safer for everybody. Yes. And it also

4:37

acknowledges that, like all work can be

4:39

kind of exploitative.

4:40

And you, oh my god, right, I

4:43

worked in corporate America and

4:45

baby, I was exploited, working

4:48

sixty hour weeks and making less than forty K

4:50

a year. Tell me how that's right,

4:53

Like.

4:54

America, get it together, Get it together, America

4:58

capitalism. Man, what

5:01

a perfect transition into

5:03

our episode. This week, Chris and I

5:05

are talking to sex workers Xavier Blanco about

5:08

how he made his teenage Nomi Malone fantasies

5:10

a reality and the hard work it

5:12

took to get there. Yeah, because sex work is

5:15

hard work. It is, and we're going to dive in further into

5:17

that. We will also find out what newbies

5:19

should know about hiring sex workers, and want

5:21

to know if you are thinking of trying out one of the world's

5:23

oldest professions yourself. Welcome to Stiffy's

5:26

Cruising Confessions. I am Gabe Gonzales.

5:28

I'm Chris Patterson Rosso. Each

5:31

week we explore this sublind world of queer sex,

5:34

cruising and relationship.

5:35

We'll be talking to queer folks of all kinds, ask them

5:37

questions, swap sex.

5:38

Stories, share intimate revelations.

5:40

A lot of us are discovering ourselves in cruising

5:43

spaces. This happened to me at this toilet stall,

5:45

in the library or the airport. I feel like

5:47

everybody's gonna fuck a little harder here.

5:49

Damn.

5:50

So I've been like the neighborhood flat and I took

5:52

pride in that. I was so afraid

5:54

but yet so intrigued.

5:56

And the more I gave to him, the more he could tak you're

6:00

having sex on Sniffy's, you already

6:02

have a moral deficit. With

6:07

the background as divers as his talents, Xavier

6:09

Blanco is a force to be reckoned with.

6:11

Xavier's a sex worker advocate and go go

6:13

dancer. Both Chris and I have had the pleasure

6:16

of seeing at core venues around NYC.

6:18

From his early days as a makeup artist to his current

6:20

endeavors in the world of sex work. Exavier

6:22

story is one of resilience and authenticity.

6:25

You can catch Savior's adventures and insights

6:27

on all social media platforms at NYC

6:30

Dominicano, where he shares his experiences,

6:32

perspectives, and some very wonderful original

6:35

content.

6:35

Welcome Xavier Blanco.

6:39

Hi, how

6:42

are you? Thanks for joining us, Thanks for having

6:45

me Xavier. Let's just start

6:47

off with a very basic definition. How would you

6:49

define sex worker? What is being a sex worker

6:51

or the word sex worker mean to you?

6:53

So it means so many different things

6:55

to so many different people. For

6:57

me, sex worker is everything that I do, from go go

6:59

dance to escorting from

7:01

and OnlyFans. Some people

7:03

that are go go dancers don't like being categorized

7:06

as a sex worker, but I feel

7:08

like when you're using your body to sell

7:11

and promote yourself like it's sex

7:13

work. And I love

7:15

using that term because I do want to. I

7:19

feel like it's not a word that should be looked at

7:21

as wrong. So the more I use

7:23

it, the more I promoted, the more

7:25

I have like a positive stance behind

7:27

it. I feel like I can, you know, go on the route

7:29

of being a good thing.

7:31

Can you talk to us about the first time you saw

7:34

a sex worker and what that felt

7:36

like. I was really

7:38

young.

7:38

It was actually a magazine and

7:41

it was at a pharmacy. My mom was like

7:43

picking up medicine and I was

7:46

just like a little kid, like rummaging through the

7:48

pharmacy in Long Island, and I saw

7:51

a playgirl, if I'm not mistaken, so I was

7:54

just like, Wow, that's hot and

7:56

did not know what that was. And then from there,

7:59

like sex has always been an interest of

8:01

mine since I was.

8:01

A little boy.

8:03

I don't know why, but I

8:05

really gravitated to that. And then seeing

8:08

people like Pamela Anderson, Jenna Jamison

8:11

Jameson, even

8:15

though she's a Republican, we

8:17

didn't.

8:17

Have to go that far.

8:21

Like when I saw a female sex workers, I

8:23

just felt like they were so empowered and they felt

8:25

so secure and that sense of

8:27

like vulnerability with security,

8:30

like I really I always just wanted that.

8:32

I never had that growing up. I grew up overweight,

8:36

felt always like different because in

8:38

my school it was like you were either black or white,

8:40

and I was never either, so

8:42

I just always constantly felt othered. And when I

8:44

saw these individuals, they just looked

8:47

super empowered and full of love

8:49

and joy, like to me like that's what I came

8:51

across.

8:52

Save here's a question for you, but truly for both of you. What

8:54

are some of your favorite experiences you've had,

8:56

either dancing or in sex work,

8:59

like anything positive?

9:01

And oh mine.

9:03

Would be with

9:06

with escorting.

9:09

In particular.

9:09

This one specific client who

9:13

when I first started working with them, I didn't know

9:15

that they just had surgery. This was also

9:17

in the middle of COVID and it

9:20

started off like as a massage session. So

9:22

at the end of the massage, he simply

9:24

I was like, can I get a hug? And I'm like, yeah, totally,

9:27

and he gave me like the most like warmest,

9:29

most embraced hug ever. And

9:32

then after it was finished, he's like thinking,

9:34

He's like, I just had surgery. He's like and then

9:36

he confessed that he hasn't touched somebody

9:38

physically in nine months.

9:40

Oh god. And it truly

9:43

like it reminded me.

9:44

And when I have moments like that, like, oh, this is

9:46

bigger than just sex, Like what we're

9:49

doing really like changes

9:51

people's lives, like getting those messages

9:54

from individuals in Arkansas

9:57

or like actually even in India,

9:59

like Hey, what you're doing is so cool.

10:02

Thank you for being so open

10:04

about your life. It's

10:06

entertainment, but it's also give somebody a little bit of,

10:08

like I don't know, like a gateway to

10:11

something that they would like to experience.

10:13

Like you could be someone else's Nom Malone,

10:16

someone else's Pam Anderson. Right, I

10:18

was gonna say Jenna Jamison, but we've already talked about Yeah,

10:20

she's a republic comparison.

10:23

It really is what

10:26

was what would be your moment? Oh gosh, Okay.

10:28

So for me, it's

10:31

been a while since I've been out of like the sex work

10:33

game in terms of escorting, but I do

10:36

remember getting a message from someone

10:38

who lived in a southern state who

10:42

was recently out, like out

10:45

in like he realized

10:47

that he was gay and

10:49

he was a bigger person, and he was

10:52

like, I'm really struggling to find connection with other

10:54

gay people, and I really just

10:56

like I want to have the sexual experience. He'd

10:59

hired this other score, but basically this person

11:01

was like using him for money, you

11:03

know, and praying on him and

11:06

just being able to like help him walk through that

11:08

process and talk to him on the phone

11:10

and just like help him realize that this person is actually

11:13

not good for you and they actually were just stealing

11:15

your money. And then

11:17

like we had a I mean that relationship lasted

11:19

I don't know, six or seven years really,

11:22

and I had a

11:24

really traumatic thing happened when I was in Atlanta

11:27

and had a boyfriend tried to commit

11:29

suicide and I didn't know anyone

11:32

there and he was there in school and

11:35

I called him and I was like, I'm going through this

11:37

thing, and he like picked me up,

11:39

he bought me food, he like sat

11:41

with me, and

11:44

it was one of the sweetest things and one of like the

11:46

greatest things that has ever happened to me. Like, you

11:50

build relationships, right, Like, yeah, sex

11:52

work is building a relationship with someone, and like just

11:55

to know that this

11:57

person who has paid me just for my time

11:59

in my conversation was willing to show up for me and

12:01

like one of the darkest moments of my life was

12:04

really it was kind of amazing to Brock.

12:06

Thank you.

12:07

Oh.

12:09

I love that.

12:10

I like hearing stories like that because it

12:13

it gives more information to like who we are,

12:16

because everybody thinks that this is just like you

12:18

know, you're fucking and you're doing all

12:20

these other things and that's all that's happening.

12:22

But there's more to this.

12:23

So much more to Yeah, there's so much more to it, at

12:25

least for me. I don't think people understand

12:27

sex workers. Like it's

12:30

really infuriating when somebody's

12:32

like assumes that my job is so much

12:34

fun and that's all it is, and

12:37

it's like, no, Actually, that day that

12:39

I had to film that scene, I felt really ugly,

12:41

and I still had to film that

12:44

that day that I felt bloated, I still had to take

12:46

that client that day that I was really exhausted

12:48

and just wanted to go to bed. I actually had to stay up

12:51

for three hours and make seven hundred dollars.

12:53

Great, but that

12:56

took energy, well three

12:58

hours, seven hundred. The math is not mathing

13:00

for that, but you know what I mean. But

13:02

yeah, like, and I feel like those are part of like

13:05

the misconceptions. So I

13:07

don't feel like I have like emotional support and then sometimes

13:09

even within my own community, like I

13:12

enjoy what I do, but I feel like I'm a little more vanilla

13:14

and some of my like

13:17

counterparts like.

13:17

I'm sorry, I'm gonna stop you. Did you see vanilla

13:22

girl, I've seen your content.

13:23

Try again, well, like I

13:26

get what you need as

13:29

a former porn editor, let me tell you I have

13:31

seen something. I

13:34

have seen some things, all right,

13:36

Right, so maybe my bar for Vanilla

13:40

there's a little more permissive.

13:42

No, you're right, yeah, Like I'm not

13:44

saying like I'm an angel, but like compared

13:46

to some of these other like content creators,

13:48

like I like my The

13:51

reason my subscribers have been my subscribers

13:53

for so long and they call me out on this anytime

13:55

it doesn't happen, is because of the connections

13:57

that they see on camera. I am very

14:00

passionate my co stars, Like I have fun

14:02

with them. I pretend that they're my boyfriends

14:04

in my head, and like I

14:09

present every hotvan on the boyfriend I meant.

14:14

To. But I need want more,

14:17

really, I gotta jump on it.

14:19

That's how life works. I

14:21

mean, we live in New York City exactly.

14:27

When it comes to clients in particular, I

14:30

have talked to folks who have encountered clients

14:32

who have a certain expectation, right, They're like, they

14:34

want you to engage in a certain fetish,

14:36

a kink, to consume

14:38

the same substances they are doing. And you talked

14:40

earlier, and you mentioned that you are a sober sex worker.

14:43

So what's it like sort of navigating that not

14:45

just with clients, but like in only fans and

14:47

the content that you create.

14:48

I'm very public about it, like I said, So

14:50

it's on all my platforms. It's

14:52

on my Twitter, is on my Instagram, is on my

14:55

rent men, is on my ret mesore, It's

14:57

on my Sniffies.

14:58

Like my sobrieties very important

15:00

to me. Number one.

15:01

I love to have sex and I love to

15:03

like fawn over men, but the one thing that I

15:06

would never put over

15:08

that is my sobriety. So I

15:10

lose a lot of clients because of it, because I'm like, you're

15:12

not gonna come here intoxicated,

15:15

You're not gonna come here high, and

15:17

I'm not gonna get high with you.

15:18

I'm not gonna watch you get high.

15:20

Even though I do have a fetish for guy smoking

15:22

weed, but I don't do that at work. I do that in

15:24

my personal life. Like they can smoke and I'm like, oh,

15:26

you're getting high. That's so hot. Yeah,

15:28

it brings me back to my childhood.

15:30

If I like the effects,

15:32

well, if they did anything, I would, Oh

15:35

thank you. All right, can we bring the weed brownies?

15:41

Listen? We can do the gang back now I

15:44

could get DP.

15:46

I was like here

15:48

and like people are walking, I'm like, is the weed

15:51

bron really coming?

15:54

We are a very sober set and we are.

15:58

And what's interesting, you know what's funny, Like when

16:00

I was doing sex work, I wasn't sober, but

16:03

I did sort of draw a line around that

16:06

with my clients. You know, sex work

16:08

is not safe work to begin with, and I'm

16:10

putting myself in some some really tricky situations,

16:13

sometimes flying to new cities without

16:15

having to meet someone, and if we're adding

16:17

that level of drugs, specifically meth, like

16:21

who knows. And so I really just drew that line

16:23

because sobriety comes first,

16:25

just like you were saying, like, if I don't

16:27

put my sobriety first, I'm gonna lose it. You

16:30

know, I've been around for I'll have nine years

16:32

very soon, and like I've

16:35

seen it happen, the people who put anything about

16:37

their sobriety, they lose it. They

16:39

lose it. And I have done a lot of

16:41

work to build a really beautiful life

16:43

for myself and I have no desire to go

16:45

back to where I was nine years ago, like

16:48

none whatsoever. So whatever it

16:50

takes I'm gonna

16:52

do it most

16:54

of the time and crying

16:57

and crying, but

16:59

I'm going to do it, you know.

17:01

Yeah, And I think it's important that you mentioned.

17:03

You know, obviously there are risks and

17:05

hazards involved with this line of work. But I think that

17:08

so many people who aren't familiar with folks who actually

17:10

are sex workers assume that that's

17:13

inhumane. And I think the reality

17:15

is that it's not danger inherent to

17:17

sex work. It is danger that is affecting sex

17:19

workers because we forced sex work into the shadows,

17:21

correct. Yeah, And so it's like to add

17:23

to compound the risk even more because you don't

17:26

have resources, right, you don't

17:28

have a union. There are very few websites

17:30

where you can safely find clients. It's just like there's

17:32

so many hurdles to your safety already that

17:34

I can totally understand being like, oh God, I

17:36

cannot.

17:37

I have to try this out. Yeah.

17:38

Yeah.

17:38

Now, when I wasn't working, she

17:42

was having a whole I was having a

17:44

lot of fun. I mean when I say fun,

17:47

like it wasn't really actually fun, but like

17:50

the moment thought it was fun. And in the moment, I absolutely

17:52

thought it was fun. But it was actually a disaster.

17:56

All right, Well, we are going to take a quick break and

17:58

when we come back, we're going to ask Xavier to share some tips

18:00

about what to do if you've decided your love.

18:02

Does cost a thing.

18:03

Don't go anywhere I can't.

18:16

For a good time, for

18:20

a good time one

18:23

eight.

18:26

Good times only

18:30

good

18:33

times, Good

18:37

times only.

18:42

Welcome back. That was one eight hundred good times

18:44

by Jeordiana.

18:46

We are here Rexavier Blanco, and he

18:48

and my co host Chris have been dragging me for my

18:51

Jlo jokes.

18:53

I love j Loo.

18:55

Thank you. She hated the joke.

18:58

I actually did not hate it.

19:01

It was okay. We've got

19:03

a mixed crowd here, we got

19:05

a mixed crowd. In our second

19:07

half of this interview, we would like to talk more

19:09

about practical advice for folks who are interested

19:11

in hiring sex workers, getting into sex work,

19:14

or leaving sex work. So what advice would you

19:16

give to somebody who is thinking of entering sex

19:18

work.

19:20

To not do it?

19:22

Okay, I mean that could be a real answer.

19:24

Yeah.

19:24

I recently did an

19:27

interview and I was like, don't do it.

19:29

I feel like a lot of people that are entering into sex

19:31

work now are doing it because

19:33

of the misconception that is easy

19:35

money and is quick money, and it's like

19:38

it's not. It's a lot of work, and

19:40

if you are going to do it, do your research and

19:42

understand, like what are your boundaries.

19:45

One of the things, one of the tips that I got very early

19:47

on when I was started to get clients was like

19:49

I had all these questions like should I do this?

19:52

How much it is?

19:53

And my friend was like, what do you want to do

19:55

and how much do you want to pay for that? Like what's

19:57

your boundary? Find that boundary

20:00

and don't cross it because it's not

20:02

easy, Like you're gonna be thrown a

20:04

lot of money to do a lot of stuff that

20:06

you might not want to do. And it's okay to say

20:08

no, Like you don't have to say yes to every

20:11

client.

20:11

You don't have to.

20:14

Put yourself in situations that you don't feel

20:17

comfortable in. And it

20:19

gets hard. A lot of people think like, oh, you're

20:21

just like rolling in dough,

20:24

But it's not always like that.

20:25

You you're not. No,

20:28

you're not, you're not. I mean, it's a lot

20:30

of work, like Zaber was saying, and like I

20:34

was making the most money after I had nurtured

20:37

these relationships for four to five years.

20:39

Yeah, right, it's

20:41

a slow vern kind of yeah. Like and

20:44

like you were saying, don't say yes to everybody,

20:47

not everybody deserves it, because it's funny.

20:49

Because also you could make so much money

20:51

early on, but then you're saying yes to all

20:53

these like bad situations that burns

20:55

you out and then you have to leave and now you're left

20:57

with like this psychological trauma

21:00

because you put yourself in situations that you actually didn't

21:02

want to do. So, yeah, you gained all that money,

21:04

but what was the expense of that? And how

21:06

much now are you going to actually have afterwards? Also

21:09

that's another thing. Do not spend all your money at

21:11

once, like invest

21:13

into something Like for me,

21:15

my investment right now is my future, which is in

21:17

school. But like, all

21:19

your money doesn't have to go to Balanciaga, all your money

21:22

doesn't have to go to trips to Turks

21:24

and Caicos and all these things.

21:25

Like you can actually use that money for your future.

21:28

Like some people might be doing

21:30

this for the rest of their life and that's a different situation.

21:32

But if you're not, and this is just going to be a moment

21:35

in time, make sure that you're thinking

21:37

about the future and like.

21:38

What you're going to do with that money? What does a typical day

21:40

look like for you? So it varies.

21:42

So that's the other thing.

21:43

Like I can literally in one

21:46

night make seven grand but not see a

21:48

client for two weeks, So

21:50

you just don't know, like what, there is

21:52

no consistency in this job. And there's

21:54

also a lot of people that flake depending who

21:56

I'm going to see in what type of work I'm

21:58

going to be doing, if I'm going to be missile is I

22:01

usually like my massaging clients a lot more than

22:03

my escorting clients at times because.

22:06

It's just a little easier.

22:09

You're literally just rubbing down a body.

22:13

Yeah, prepping

22:15

for a bottom is a lot and a lot of people

22:17

don't realize like what and

22:19

like for me, it's like if I have an accident,

22:22

which jinkstock on wood, there's oh this is right.

22:24

Here with a client

22:26

like that's and especially if it was the first experience,

22:28

like that's the experience they're going to leave with, They're

22:31

probably not going to hire me again. So

22:33

massaging is a lot a lot easier, But if I'm

22:35

going to be escorting, I call it the boyfriend experience.

22:37

Like I am going I'm doing a deep dive. I'm

22:40

like making sure that my beard

22:42

is trim and making sure that I smell good. I'm making

22:44

sure that whatever this person enjoys.

22:47

Like every all my clients like different aspects

22:49

of me, so I'm like suiting up for that.

22:52

Like these glasses actually make me a lot

22:54

of money. A lot of my clients love to have me in

22:56

these classes, which is really funny.

22:59

But it's like getting the right wardrobe

23:02

and like preparing myself mentally, like

23:04

who what character am I playing? Which

23:06

Xavier Blancos am I for this individual?

23:09

Do they want me to be the hyper sexual? Do

23:11

they want me to be the more submissive? Do they want

23:13

me to be submissive but dominant during these times?

23:15

And like it's exhausting, Like once you're

23:17

done with a session, like a

23:20

lot goes into it. Like for me, it's like I'm

23:22

not the ala carte escort, So I'm really

23:24

thinking about, like what is going to make this individual

23:27

feel special by the end of it?

23:29

Yeah, yeah, I'm curious.

23:31

So you mentioned you know that escorting

23:33

is really difficult, and you've talked a lot about the

23:36

sort of emotional work that goes into it and

23:38

the prep. I'm curious, do you find

23:40

that your work for OnlyFans is just as time

23:42

consuming, even if it's like a different kind.

23:44

Of it's even more time consuming.

23:46

Like I give it up to just influencers

23:49

and content creators in general. Like I

23:52

did a like a ten second

23:54

reel that took me twenty seven minutes

23:56

to edit on the fucking treadmill, and

23:58

I'm just like Jesus for ten seconds.

24:01

And that's what only fans.

24:02

Like that happens with only fans, Like you're creating these trailers,

24:05

you're marketing yourself, You're following up

24:07

with dms and messages, and like

24:09

this person just sent me a hundred dollars, so I have to make sure

24:11

I respond to this, And it's there's

24:13

a lot of moving pieces, and I'm

24:15

a one man show. Some of these

24:18

content creators that are in the one percent and are

24:20

making all these money, they have people answering

24:22

back all these like dms, they have these people editing

24:24

their videos and creating content for them, and

24:27

I have to do that all by myself. And

24:30

when you're doing it for only fans, the

24:32

harder aspect of that is that it's different

24:34

platforms. So my content that goes on Instagram

24:37

can be the same that goes on X,

24:39

and then that that goes on X

24:41

can be what goes on Only Fans because then your

24:43

subscribers are like, well, I might as well just be

24:45

on X because you're putting posting the same things

24:47

over there.

24:48

So you have to really be you.

24:51

Have to think out what your strategy

24:53

is and what are you going to be portraying and how you're

24:55

going to portray it and be consistent with

24:57

it.

24:57

Yeah, that's a lot.

25:00

It's a lot of work.

25:01

I mean I was reading an interview with

25:03

someone who was in the top one percent of Only Fans

25:06

creators and they quit their full time job. The

25:08

person was like, how much do you make a year? And it was a lot

25:10

of money. But then he was like, yeah, I think I worked sixty

25:12

to eighty hours a week.

25:13

Yeah.

25:14

I was like I don't. I mean, I've worked like maybe

25:16

fifty when I've had like a couple of freelance

25:18

jobscoring, But sixty to eighty hours a week.

25:20

You're like filming, You're booking people

25:23

to be in scenes with you, you're editing

25:25

them. It's like the copy that goes with

25:27

the video. It's like it really is wild.

25:29

It's almost like a job and.

25:30

A half, it is.

25:31

And that's the reason why I say, like when people are like, oh,

25:34

I want to do this, is like specifically,

25:36

even with OnlyFans, I'm like, you can't delete

25:38

these things that you're putting up. Like I

25:41

say, like, it's kind of like you wanted to

25:43

do tennis, like and then you decide to

25:45

not do it anymore. Like cool, you're not doing that anymore

25:47

OnlyFans. Like, once that's public, once

25:50

people know that you did this, this is following you for the rest

25:52

of your life. And it's a lot of

25:54

work that people don't realize that goes

25:56

into this, and there's a.

25:58

Lot of planning to it.

26:00

Yeah, and it's very disheartening

26:02

when somebody's like, yeah, I want to do this because and it's like

26:04

such a fleeting thought to them. It's like, wow, you really

26:06

think that I'm just like sitting around doing

26:09

nothing with my listing record?

26:11

Yeah, oh

26:13

my god.

26:15

I wish I could use the unedited version.

26:17

And I wish that I wasn't investing money into

26:19

camera lighting, multiple yeah,

26:23

all that stuff. Yeah, all that like

26:25

it's money, like they don't realize it.

26:27

I don't know. Let's say I'm like looking

26:30

to hire a sex worker for the first time, what

26:32

advice would you give to someone?

26:34

Ask questions and don't feel

26:37

like you're being inappropriate with asking those questions.

26:41

I've gotten people asking questions

26:43

and they're like, I'm so sorry with all these questions, and I'm

26:45

like, no, it's totally fine, and they'll say, well, this other

26:48

person I was speaking to was very upset. I'm

26:50

like, well, maybe do's not the sex sex worker you're

26:52

looking for that like ask the questions,

26:54

like you're about to get naked with this person, You're

26:56

about to be intimate with this person. If the person

26:58

you're hiring does and want to respond

27:00

to them, or it feels like there are too many questions and

27:03

you need these questions answer, maybe that's not the

27:05

sex worker for you. Like there's a plethora of us

27:07

out there, which sucks

27:09

for me.

27:10

So if you're not, but you have something special, oh

27:12

I do what you're offering. Not a lot

27:14

of people are offering no at all, Like

27:16

you're an experience with me.

27:18

Not only are you gonna come, but you're gonna leave there feeling

27:20

good about yourself, Like I I'm

27:22

not into humiliation. I'm not into like

27:24

making somebody feel that they're beneath

27:27

me, like this is this?

27:28

I enjoy this?

27:29

Like there's clients that are looking for that, and I even, like

27:32

I tell them from the beginning, I'm like, I'm not that person

27:34

for you. I don't know how I tried

27:36

that whole fin down for a while. God, you can make

27:38

so much easy money, but like I can't

27:40

like is it easy though, well

27:42

I shouldn't say easy money.

27:43

You're right, it's it's hard. Well for me, it was hard.

27:46

You know, you can find a cash pick and make a

27:48

lot of money off of them, but you have

27:50

to be that type of person that's going to be treating

27:52

them pretty shitty. And it's really funny because

27:55

there's also like a limit and then if you pass

27:57

that limit, they're like, oh, I'm not into this. So if

27:59

you're not sad you with it, is that going to work

28:01

out? So I'm like, I'm not that person. I

28:03

am not dominant by any means.

28:05

I can be a bossy bottom like

28:07

some people like to say, but I don't think so. I

28:11

don't understand why they call me a bossy bottom. I

28:13

just like what I like, I'm

28:16

my girl.

28:16

Have you seen your contents?

28:20

There's a difference.

28:21

Yeah, but I'm so submissive

28:24

I want to lead into that no

28:30

where, So

28:36

yeah, I would say ask questions, like ask

28:38

questions.

28:39

Don't be ashamed of what you're doing.

28:40

Like some people feel like they're doing

28:42

something dirty and appropriate.

28:44

It's like, no, we're two consenting.

28:47

Grown adults about to do

28:49

something that we both should enjoy

28:51

and feel safe. And and if

28:53

you don't even want to feel safe in it, like that's cool,

28:55

Like you can find somebody that's for that.

28:57

So yeah, ask a lot of questions. What

29:00

does retirement look like for you?

29:02

Uh, retirement for me looks

29:04

like like I will always be part of the sex work

29:07

industry. I do want to

29:09

become an advocate for it. I want

29:12

to help other sex workers that

29:14

are either up and coming or are still

29:16

in the industry. But I'm

29:18

currently in school. I am going to

29:21

school to become an accountant. I want to get

29:23

my CPA license, Like I want

29:25

to have my own firm,

29:27

and I I think sky's

29:29

the limit, Like I've really learned in this industry,

29:31

Like you actually don't have to have like tunnel

29:33

vision. I know, like some of the things

29:35

that I want to be doing, but it doesn't

29:38

have to just be like this particular

29:40

thing. So retirement

29:42

for me would be somewhere with a boat

29:44

in the middle of the ocean taking

29:47

emails.

29:48

I love that, Like literally, I.

29:50

Love that your fantasy was like a boat the ocean

29:52

and emails.

29:54

Yeah, the last part, but

29:56

like the email, well, because

29:58

you know, I'm still going to be doing.

30:00

Work like I want to, you know, and

30:02

don't get the bad.

30:05

Yeah.

30:06

Literally, bots are expensive.

30:09

It was like, well, like because

30:12

it was Pamela Anderson Tommy Lee's video that

30:14

really.

30:14

Like on the films on the boat right, Yes,

30:17

is that.

30:17

Really solidified, like this is what I want

30:19

to do and I want to fulfill that

30:21

fantasy, like I want to be

30:23

in the middle of that's

30:28

another hundred grand just

30:31

wow, oh

30:34

my god, that's all right.

30:36

Yeah.

30:37

In my industry, there's so many people

30:39

that do get tunnel vision and don't

30:42

think that they can be anything else more than

30:44

just a sex worker, or that

30:46

sex work only means one.

30:48

Single thing, like you can do so much in it.

30:50

Yeah, I know. I met a lot

30:52

of folks when I was working editing that

30:56

that did retire and did something that was vastly different,

30:58

right, folks that went into public health, that

31:00

went back to law school, that started

31:03

working at like local clinics. And it's

31:05

interesting because I really do think so

31:07

many of the people that I met that

31:09

were working as either escorts or porn performers

31:13

taught me things about sexual health

31:15

that I had never learned. Taught me about community

31:17

locations, like really a

31:19

fountain of knowledge, like the patients,

31:22

the sort of vulnerability and the

31:24

know how to be able to manage

31:26

their own career in any kind of sex

31:28

work. It's like you've really got to be dedicated, you've got

31:30

to be knowledgeable, you've got to be on top of your stuff.

31:33

And it's like that's a skill set that you can apply

31:35

in any career, Like you've

31:37

really built a valuable skill

31:40

set interfacing with other people or

31:42

working on your own behalf.

31:43

When I was doing my resume recently, like

31:47

sadly, like I can't put escorting

31:50

on my resume or

31:52

even the only fans really, but

31:54

I have gained so many skills from

31:57

it, Like I've learned to manage a full

31:59

business, a business that pays for

32:01

my rent, my bills, and my school.

32:04

That's gonna like further my future and talking

32:06

about sexual health. Like, I get so

32:09

annoyed when people find out that I'm a

32:11

sex worker and they're like, oh, STIs

32:13

and all this, and I'm like, Babe, if I get an STI

32:16

I'm not working.

32:16

And if I'm not working, I'm not making money.

32:18

So while you were at the cock taking

32:20

dick, I had to be careful

32:22

about my sexual adventures

32:25

because if I do get something, I

32:27

can't work.

32:28

That's a really good point. I think a lot of the folks

32:30

that I've met in sex work are getting tested more

32:32

regularly every three months rather than every six

32:34

months, which is the same regimen of

32:37

testing for when you're on prep. And so it's so funny

32:39

that people are like, oh, folks are on prep or folks who

32:41

do sex workers, don't we responsible And it's like no, baby,

32:43

We're like literally,

32:48

it's really wild. So this has been

32:50

really incredible. I'm so glad we did get

32:52

to have a little fun, but also like dive

32:54

a little deeper into some.

32:55

Of the topics that mean a lot to you. Yeah, thank

32:58

you so much for being here. I love you dearly.

33:01

Where can people find you?

33:03

You can find me on all social media platforms

33:05

as NYC Dominicano. A

33:08

little tip if you're looking to get into sex work

33:10

and to be public with it, please

33:12

have the same handle across the board.

33:15

You want people to find you.

33:16

You do not need a different one for your Instagram,

33:18

your Twitter, your only fans. Don't make

33:20

it hard for them to find me, so you can find

33:23

me NYC Dominicano.

33:26

I love it. Consistency is key, baby,

33:28

that's also a great screen name. I can't believe

33:30

you nabbed it. It was actually a

33:32

joke because I am

33:34

Dominican. I do live in New York City, but I

33:36

grew up very Americanized. I grew up

33:39

very feeling others.

33:40

Like I said, so my friend studied as a joke,

33:42

like, oh my god, you should be NYC Dominicano because

33:44

I'm far from that.

33:45

Like, I don't know how to dance.

33:48

I love my culture, save

33:51

my life, you know what I mean?

33:52

Well, maybe now you're any Porto Ricano.

33:58

Platforms.

33:59

No.

33:59

I bet j Low took that too. We

34:01

love her. Good night, all

34:04

right, thank you, gain Xavier. We're going to take a break

34:06

and when we come back, we're playing Pump or

34:08

Dump.

34:15

All right, It's time to play our favorite game.

34:17

Here cruising confessions, pump or

34:19

dump. I love it.

34:20

You all know how this works. Okay, I'm going

34:22

to explain it again. But we it's not too complicated,

34:25

right, We've got pump and dump. What do those things mean.

34:27

Pump means we're living for it, we would come for

34:30

it, we're obsessed. And dump means

34:32

we will flush it away. Okay, We're not here

34:34

to yuck your yum, but we are here to dump

34:36

it.

34:36

Correct.

34:37

Okay, amazing Colin Farrell

34:41

Farrell Pump, I'm

34:43

pumping on. I don't know a lot about him,

34:46

okay, but I know that he was

34:48

also another celebrity sex tape that was released.

34:50

It was good. It was short,

34:52

but good, it was very good. So

34:55

I will give him pump for that. I'll

34:57

give him a big old pump. Yeah, he could give me one

34:59

too. I still go back

35:01

to that film.

35:04

In a pinch.

35:05

That's what I want to watch. I

35:11

can't, I can't.

35:12

You know what I you know I haven't seen in a while. Exactly.

35:14

Let's rewatch Sex in the Cities and

35:18

yes.

35:18

Thank you exactly.

35:20

I love that. You're sure

35:23

you've got a hard drive with just Golden Girl episodes

35:25

and the Colin feral.

35:26

Sex tape of course, naturally.

35:28

Yeah, Yeah, I just say I have a weird

35:30

feeling about celebrity sex tapes because

35:32

I obviously watched it as a teenager when

35:34

LimeWire was a thing. Baby Love Her,

35:37

the things I was downloading on LimeWire. Yeah, I

35:39

feel weird looking back on that as

35:41

an adult because I'm like, I don't know if this

35:43

was released with this person's consent.

35:45

It never was.

35:46

It makes me feel really bad. It

35:48

makes me feel bad thinking about it now, but

35:50

I did not feel about watching it when I.

35:52

Was sixteen, all right.

35:53

Next up is the new Deadpool

35:56

and Wolverine movie, which I'm asking you about

35:58

before it has come out. It's coming out and alive.

36:00

Yes, it's

36:02

a pump for me. Yeah, Deadpool

36:04

sexy. Hugh Jackman is

36:06

sexy as Wolverine. Hugh

36:09

Jackman is sexy, not as Wolverine, So

36:11

pump. I'm pumping for Hugh Jackman in

36:14

a sleeveless Wolverine costume. It

36:16

is. And that beard that was

36:18

my sexual awakening in the ANSI series

36:20

as a child Harry

36:23

superhero where you could see.

36:24

His like forearms a beast.

36:25

Yeah. Oh, actually, Wolverine

36:29

gets a pump. Yeah, but like Beast

36:31

gets a pump, he

36:34

gets a pump for that blue dick. You know what

36:36

I'm saying. If

36:38

we have any Beast players out there,

36:41

I'm like, okay, you're into it. Yeah, I heard

36:43

his big muscles. Okay, that's

36:45

light on paper. Beast is

36:47

my man, and he's also a nerd. He's

36:50

such a nerd. He's always like quoting, like

36:52

like, yes, he's always reading things. Oh

36:55

we're coming.

36:55

Where are you, Beast?

36:56

Yeah?

36:56

Where are you?

36:57

He wasn't on this list, but he is now He's a pump.

37:00

Yeah for sure. Great. Next

37:02

up is La grand Wolf.

37:04

The Grand Wolf. I am somewhat

37:06

familiar with his work.

37:08

Yeah I don't know who that is.

37:09

Oh really yeah, prolific, poor performer,

37:12

very tall, kind

37:14

of gingery hair. Okay, well I'm just

37:16

really really fat. The ginger

37:18

grates are comfort. Oh that's all you needed. I

37:20

really I didn't even have to get No, you

37:23

said ginger, and I'm like, yes, that's it, all

37:25

right. So he might be sliding into your DMS

37:27

after that. Yeah, yeah, be incredible.

37:30

But do you think he likes my flavor?

37:31

I'm sure. I feel like he is

37:34

so prolific.

37:35

He likes it.

37:35

He's tried every flavor of ice cream cold Stone

37:37

Creamery.

37:38

He is. I

37:40

thought you're gonna say, Baskt and Robbins with a thirty one

37:42

but no cream

37:45

and the title right, of course, you're

37:47

good. You're so good.

37:49

I got all right. Well, that's the end of our show.

37:51

Thank you so much for joining us, and I hope you tune

37:53

into the next episode. Sniffy's Cruising Confessions

37:56

is a production of Outspoken podcast Network

37:58

from iHeart Podcasts. It's directed

38:00

by Adam Barron, produced by Stevie Williams

38:02

and Cameron Femino, and executive produced

38:05

by Eli Martin. Cruising Confessions

38:07

is presented by Sniffy's, the ultimate map

38:09

based cruising platform for gay, by

38:11

and curious.

38:12

People ready to cruise.

38:13

Check out the map at Sniffy's dot com and

38:16

follow Sniffy's on socials at Sniffy's

38:18

app.

38:18

Put Joe Put Put Joe put put,

38:20

Joe puts up.