In a change to the usual programme, this week we present a “highlight” from the career of Theodore Pilkington-Rhubarb. This particular show is from his early works providing and English commentary for Jeopardy In Icing 1861, a second-rate cook

Tales of New Albion (S2) - EAR-MOO B Part 3

Sep 28th, 2021 26m 56s

Well tickle me sideways with a kipper I do believe it’s time for the ARC Light Programme to return for your aural titillation. This week on Slumbertime Stories we finally get to the end of EAR-MOO B from Tales of New Albion Volume 2. In fact

Tales of New Albion (S2) - EAR-MOO B Part 2

Aug 17th, 2021 26m 56s

Wot ho and, indeed, ay caramba! It’s time for the ARC Light Programme to detune itself in real time once again. This week on Slumbertime Stories it’s the second part of EAR-MOO B from Tales of New Albion Volume 2. Beyond that is anyone’s gues

Tales of New Albion (S2) - EAR-MOO B Part 1

Apr 8th, 2021 30m 51s

Chin up old thing, it’s time for the ARC Light Programme to return once again. This week on Slumbertime Stories Theodore reads the first part of EAR-MOO B from Tales of New Albion Volume 2. What else? Well I suspect they’ll try and do another

Tales of New Albion(S2) - A Martian Calls

Feb 8th, 2021 23m 36s

In a change to the usual programme, this week the ARC Light Programme brings you a "Special" feature. To commemorate the fourth anniversary of him joining the ARC, Theodore Pilkington-Rhubarb talks us through an infamous on-air moment known as

Tales of New Albion (S2) - Crash Again (Again) Part 2

Jan 24th, 2021 18m 39s

A might huzzah is let forth from the mouths of men, women, children and semi-sentient dolphins as Tales of New Albion returns once again. This week there are the manifold delights of the second part of Crash Again (Again) read as always by the

Tales of New Albion (S2) - An Urgent Message from ARC

Dec 21st, 2020 7m 39s

Attention nation, please stand by for an urgent message from the ARC (Please note this is a pre-recorded message, so don’t bother phoning the Corporation to complain, there’s nobody here).For more about Tales of New Albion please visit www.ta

Tales of New Albion (S2) - Crash Again (Again) Part 1

Dec 17th, 2020 22m 16s

This week on the Light Programme it seems that Theodore is still unavailable, due to an ongoing crisis of character. So, once again, we have the multi-award winning journalist, writer and think-tank contributor, PG Basilthorpe-Stilton OAE cond

Tales of New Albion (S2) - The Battle of Turnip Field

Dec 4th, 2020 31m 11s

This week on the Light Programme it seems that Theodore is unavailable, due to an unfortunate lapse in moral fibre. Instead, at very short (and expensive) notice, we have the journalist and writer PG Basilthorpe-Stilton OAE educating the natio

Tales of New Albion (S2) - Welcome to Aeropa

Nov 25th, 2020 32m 3s

Where do all the airships go? It’s a good question, and we’re about to find out as it’s time, once again for Slumbertime Stories on the Light Programme, and this week it’s a story called “Welcome to Aeropa”. It’s read as usual by Theodore Pil

Tales of New Albion (S2)- Halloween Special the Third

Oct 31st, 2020 53m 4s

Wooooooh! And now on the Light Programme it's time for Hallowe'en Special the Third, and this time it actually is Hallowe’en! Or is it? Yes, it really is! Our story this week is All Hallow's Eve at Wurrelds End by that spawn of satan - Nils V

Tales of New Albion (S2) - Crash Again Part 2

Oct 26th, 2020 25m 35s

Here we go again with another episode of the ARC Light Programme. In this programme Theodore Pilkington-Rhubarb reads the concluding part of the (uncreatively named) story Crash Again from Tales of New Albion. Before all that though there’s a

Tales of New Albion (S2) – Crash Again Part 1

Oct 19th, 2020 21m 41s

Whoop and, indeed, huzzah! The Light Programme returns again following last week’s rude interruption by current affairs. This time Theodore reads part one of Crash Again (by Daren Callow) on Slumbertime Stories. Plus, despite misgivings of h

Tales of New Albion (S2) - The War Cabinet Meets

Mar 13th, 2020 15m 18s

We interrupt your usual programme to take you live to momentous events on the south coast of New Albion. I leave you in the capable hands of ARC World Service newshound – Igor Beaver, in a secret location (it’s not all zat zecret!). This week

Tales of New Albion (S2) - Halloween Special Number 2

Oct 31st, 2019 32m 38s

This week on the Light Programme it's the Hallowe'en Special number 2, and this time it actually is Hallowe’en, although it still isn't all that special. Our story this week is The Birth of Queen Rat from Elements of Horror Book 3: Fire! Read

Tales of New Albion (S2) – Admiral Sherman Solves Another Case Part 2

Oct 3rd, 2019 19m 22s

Tonight on the ARC Light Programme it's time for the concluding part of Admiral Sherman Solves Another Case, or the Mystery of the Missing Missive. Before that though, there's just enough time to squeeze in another round of Can You Guess What

Tales of New Albion (S2) – Admiral Sherman Solves Another Case Part 1

Jul 26th, 2019 26m 21s

Well hello, Cecil Fantasma here! I will now astral-project this week’s episode of The Light Programme directly into your mind. WooOOOooh! What do you mean it’s not working? Oh well then you’ll just have to listen to it the normal way via you

Tales of New Albion (S2) - Crash Part 2

Jul 19th, 2019 25m 57s

Wot ho! The Light Programme returns this week with another venture into the bright future with the Listener’s Telephone-In Quiz – “Can you guess what it is that I’m describing?”. This week featuring someone who is definitely not Luigi Englebe

Tales of New Albion (S2) - Crash Part 1

Apr 16th, 2019 22m 42s

Well now, what's that you say, another episode of the ARC Light Programme? Well certainly. This week it features part one of Crash by Daren Callow read by your host Theodore Pilkington-Rhubarb. The Listener's Quiz however was utterly ruined

Tales of New Albion (S2) - Monkey Teaspoon Design Agency Part 2

Apr 11th, 2019 31m 6s

This week on the Light Programme it’s the concluding part of Monkey Teaspoon Design Agency, read by your perennial host – Theodore Pilkington-Rhubarb. Also it’s the return of the lamentable telephone quiz – “Can you guess what it is that I’m d

Tales of New Albion (S2) - Monkey Teaspoon Design Agency Part 1

Jan 29th, 2019 30m 23s

What ho! The Light Programme is back with a bang! Or somesuch. This week we have another new episode of Slumbertime Stories, featuring a young lady and her first day at the Monkey Teaspoon Design Agency. Hear the thrills and spills as she tr

Tales Of New Albion - Halloween Special

Sep 25th, 2018 22m 1s

This week on the Light Programme it's a Hallowe'en Special, although it's not Hallowe'en. And it isn't all that special. Our story this week is The True Tale Of The Crown Of Imagincipation by that devil of a chap - Peter Gardiner. Read as al

Tales of New Albion - The Best Of The Light Programme

Aug 23rd, 2018 23m 15s

The Albion Radiophonic Corporation is, reasonably, proud to present the Best of The Light Programme 1818. When we say "Best of" we mean "most tolerated" and by that we mean "received the least complaints". Featuring contributions from Mrs. T

Tales of New Albion - In The Shadow Of The Moon (Chapter 1) Part 2

Aug 2nd, 2018 30m 16s

In the last episode of the current series, we have another (unsuccessful) attempt at the feature: Listener's Telephone In followed by the very final part of Tales Of New Albion - Volume One. This time it's In The Shadow Of The Moon (chapter 1)

Tales of New Albion - In The Shadow Of The Moon (Chapter 1) Part 1

Jul 13th, 2018 27m 10s

Ahoy hoy! The Light Programme returns with your host Theodore Pilkington-Rhubarb. This show features a first for the Albion Radiophonic Corporation - a live "Listener Telephone In". What could possibly go wrong? All music by Charlotte Savig