0:05

Hello , my loves , and welcome to the Purposeful

0:07

Lifestyle Development Podcast , where we discuss

0:09

all things thought , work and manifestation

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, but we use neuroscience and the

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study of the brain to do so . I'm

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your host , tessa Spizak . I'm a board-certified

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practitioner , master , life and health coach

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and seasoned executive speaker . If

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you are ready to create your highest value lifestyle

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and turn your dream life into a reality , you're

0:28

in the right place . Let's get right into

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today's episode . Hello

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, hello my loves , welcome back to another

0:36

episode here on the Purposeful Lifestyle

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Development Podcast . Thank you

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so much for everyone who tunes in weekly

0:42

. I so appreciate you spending your

0:44

time here with me and if you're

0:46

new here , welcome . Don't

0:49

forget to hit subscribe so that you never miss

0:51

part of our conversation . And

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this week's conversation is a

0:55

bit of a continuation from last week

0:58

, talking about getting aligned with

1:00

our big goals and with our big dreams

1:02

and who we want to be . Taking

1:04

inventory to stay clear

1:06

on where we are , where

1:08

we want to go and allowing

1:11

for the ebbs and flows in life to

1:13

come , but without

1:15

knocking us off of our footing . So

1:17

today I want to talk about taking some general

1:20

inventory . This is a great

1:22

monthly practice , again for

1:24

that practice of identity alignment

1:27

. This is great to do quarterly

1:29

, or if you're something like an entrepreneur

1:32

where maybe your day-to-day changes a

1:34

lot , maybe this is even

1:36

a good quick practice to do weekly

1:39

. But just know , this is a super

1:41

simple tool . It won't take you more than a few

1:43

minutes and it really does

1:46

not have to be some intense

1:48

journaling session where we

1:50

feel all the feelings or some really

1:52

deep meditation session . I

1:54

promise it's just four questions

1:57

, only four , but it will really

1:59

help make sure that your actions

2:01

are in line with the things that you

2:03

actually want for you . So

2:06

let's just jump right into it super quick

2:08

and on the money today . So

2:10

here are four questions . First

2:13

, I want you to ask yourself what era

2:15

am I in right now ? What season

2:18

am I in ? Where is the majority

2:20

of my attention and my energy going

2:22

at this time ? So

2:24

, if you maybe have a big career event happening

2:26

right now , or if you're in the middle of moving

2:29

, or if you have kids who are in some

2:31

kind of transition in school

2:33

or what have you , so you're focusing on them

2:35

through that , maybe you have a big

2:38

fitness goal that you're working on or you're

2:40

giving your attention intentionally

2:42

to your creative things , just

2:45

check in , kind of ground yourself

2:47

with what your big right nows

2:50

are . Like I said earlier on

2:52

, this can be maybe quarterly

2:55

, every few months , looking at , okay

2:57

, what is the last few months been , what is

2:59

the next few months . This could

3:01

be monthly that's kind of what I suggest or

3:03

, again , for some people , maybe

3:05

weekly , just like a regular thing that we do . But

3:08

check in and really

3:10

ground yourself when asking yourself

3:13

where are you right

3:15

now ? And this helps you do two things

3:17

. First , it gives you

3:19

an opportunity to really give yourself

3:22

a bit of some honest

3:24

feedback . Is what you're currently

3:26

doing working ? Does it feel

3:28

good to you , does it feel successful

3:31

and kind of like flow ? Are

3:33

there some areas that maybe

3:35

you'd need to change or address ? Maybe

3:38

you notice that there's something that should

3:41

be getting a bit more of your attention

3:43

and focus . But whatever it

3:45

is , this is really just a

3:47

really simple way to get an overview picture

3:49

of where your energy is

3:51

going and seeing if

3:53

it's going where you want it to . But

3:55

also , secondarily , I think it's really

3:58

important because asking

4:00

yourself this question and honestly

4:02

actually finding that answer

4:04

it gives you an opportunity to

4:06

remind yourself that if

4:08

the majority of your energy is

4:11

going to these certain areas

4:13

. It's okay if you're

4:15

not 100%

4:17

in every single other

4:19

area , that if one space

4:22

, one portion of what you're doing of

4:24

your life right now is getting

4:26

a lot of focus , it's okay

4:29

that you're not keen-eyed

4:31

, super clear , focus on absolutely

4:33

everything else . Shonda

4:36

Rhimes she's an actress and so many other

4:38

wonderful things gave this really famous

4:40

and really really powerful

4:42

commencement speech at Dartmouth and

4:45

it's referenced all the time where

4:47

she says in so many , so

4:49

many beautiful words and lots of examples

4:51

, but she basically gives the message

4:54

of if I'm succeeding

4:56

in one area of my life , this

4:58

does mean that I'm having to sacrifice in another

5:01

, and that's true for all of

5:03

us . We unfortunately haven't made it

5:05

to superhuman yet , so we

5:07

may not be able to give 100%

5:10

of ourselves to every single

5:12

thing at every single moment . But

5:15

by doing this and giving yourself

5:17

this understanding , almost making this declaration

5:20

of hey , I know what I'm focusing

5:22

on is here right now it

5:24

essentially gives yourself the

5:27

space or it allows yourself to

5:29

feel safe with your

5:31

current focus , and I really think

5:33

this will help in a lot of ways . It'll help

5:35

you again , not just keep yourself

5:37

feeling safe with that focus , but

5:39

it'll help you avoid burnout later

5:41

on , so that you're not trying to

5:44

give 1000% of you to everything

5:46

and really just a whole host

5:48

of other reasons . But the main point

5:51

here is , with the first question

5:53

is that we are anchoring into our

5:55

decision what season are we

5:57

? What era is this ? Where's

6:00

our attention and focus ? What are the big things

6:02

? The next question , once

6:04

you have a good answer there , that we want to ask ourselves

6:06

is what is going really well

6:08

for me right now ? Or , more specifically

6:11

, what am I doing currently

6:13

that is successfully filling

6:15

up my cup or helping me get to where

6:17

I want to go ? What habits

6:19

did I develop or keep up with

6:22

that have supported me in what I'm doing ? What

6:25

am I proud of myself for in terms of

6:27

what I'm doing for myself , my health

6:29

, my goals , my big dreams ? What

6:32

are these things ? List amount . This

6:35

not only gives you the chance to acknowledge

6:37

and do a good , positive callout

6:39

of all the things that you're doing and

6:42

the things that you want to keep your focus on doing

6:44

, more of which we know

6:46

, when we do that nice pat on

6:48

the back , so to speak , the brain

6:50

gets a nice head of dopamine and it's

6:52

going to start a nice positivity loop

6:54

where it wants to continue to do these things

6:56

, but also it really

6:59

does help take that inventory

7:01

and have more awareness of what's

7:03

going on in your life that you do

7:05

have control over . Because

7:08

also , here's a good point too

7:10

as you make this list

7:12

of all the things that you're doing that are great

7:14

, that you're proud of yourself for whether you're

7:16

taking your vitamins , you're staying hydrated

7:19

, you're committing to learning about the thing , whatever

7:22

that case may be , even if it's as

7:24

small , as I had this negative

7:26

thought and I changed it . I've gotten better at

7:28

talking to myself in this way , something internal

7:31

that nobody else can even

7:33

see . As we make

7:35

this list , there's a good

7:38

chance that there is a subliminal

7:40

little list forming of

7:42

a few things that maybe

7:45

you wish you had done . Maybe

7:47

you wish you had committed to these as

7:49

well or been a little bit better

7:51

at , especially . If that's

7:53

the case , here's your question

7:56

three If

7:58

you're just on the ball , then maybe

8:00

there's not much on this list

8:02

. But , to be fully transparent , when

8:05

I do this for me even though I'm

8:07

a coach in this I teach people

8:09

how to do this I typically have some

8:11

things on here as well . But

8:13

what would you like to see more

8:15

of or less of from

8:18

yourself in this upcoming month

8:20

, week , whatever time frame . What

8:23

are the things in your current reality that you

8:25

currently have the ability

8:27

to change that ? If you're being

8:29

honest , you know that they're

8:32

getting in your way of the big dreams

8:34

, the things that you want to achieve for yourself

8:36

. Maybe we're still doing

8:38

some action that doesn't exactly

8:40

fit with what we're working towards

8:42

. Let's make a note of that here , too . What

8:45

do we wish we were doing that we weren't yet , the

8:47

habits that we're trying to anchor

8:49

in on and maybe they just haven't set forth

8:52

yet , maybe the things that we're

8:54

trying to stop doing and

8:56

that kind of fell through the cracks , maybe picking

8:58

that back up . Again , this is a time

9:00

to be really , really gentle . This

9:03

is not a space for you to judge yourself

9:05

. Shaming does nothing positive

9:07

whatsoever . Again , we're just

9:09

calling awareness . We're

9:11

getting this bird's eye view . We're getting the

9:13

bigger picture . Put it out there

9:16

so that we know we can see it . Here's

9:19

the things that maybe aren't

9:21

serving me right now . Then

9:23

we can come up with a plan , of course , to add

9:26

it , take it out if it's something that we don't

9:28

want anymore and we'll go from

9:30

there . But again , just

9:32

seeing that , getting that on paper . Finally

9:36

, your last question where

9:38

do I want to be ? Where do I

9:40

actually see myself in the next month

9:42

With what I'm doing and

9:44

with what I expect to happen if I keep it up

9:46

and this goes as planned ? Where

9:49

do I expect to be ? This

9:52

gives you a little goal to focus on a

9:54

smaller time frame , something more manageable

9:56

that you can really really put your attention

9:59

onto , instead

10:01

of just having this overall goal

10:03

of something . Like you know , here's

10:05

one that we hear a lot . I think , again

10:08

, we can all pull our own personal

10:10

thing in here but say it's

10:12

this overall goal of something that's like I want to

10:14

get more fit , I want to get stronger . That

10:17

is commendable , we like that

10:19

right , but it's also totally open-ended

10:21

and I'm sure means so

10:23

many things to you being more fit , being

10:26

stronger there's a whole host

10:28

of different things that that could mean . But

10:30

instead , when we're doing these questions

10:33

and we're checking in with hey , what

10:35

do I think that next month is going to look like ? What

10:38

happens if I keep this up ? Now

10:40

the answer is much more detailed

10:42

. It's something like well , if

10:44

I keep this up , I'll have a whole month of more

10:47

consistency . I want to

10:49

keep improving and working towards heavier

10:51

weights in this workout and

10:53

at this time next month , I think I'll

10:55

be more confident in my time management

10:58

of my workout routine . I'll feel

11:00

more disciplined in how many times I show up

11:02

. I think the things that feel really difficult

11:04

to me right now , if I keep

11:06

doing this , it makes logical sense

11:09

to say it's going to be a bit easier for

11:11

me and so I'm going to be excited about

11:13

that Get specific . Get

11:16

more specific , then . What

11:18

do you actually realistically

11:20

expect to happen if you keep up the

11:23

habits and routines that you have now the

11:25

good ones , and maybe not

11:27

the great ones , right , the ones that

11:29

we're not so happy about and if

11:32

this feels too weird I've heard

11:34

this before sometimes it feels like you just can't

11:36

do this on yourself objectively

11:38

Then just imagine you're

11:40

doing this for someone else , a faceless

11:42

person , just person A

11:44

. If person A was

11:47

to spend their time and energy committed to

11:49

this thing , disciplined to doing

11:51

this thing , giving themselves love

11:53

and filling up their cup in this way

11:55

, what growth or accomplishment

11:58

do you expect would happen for them ? What

12:00

makes logical sense there ? So

12:03

, as you can see , these four questions

12:05

. They are not difficult and you can

12:07

really knock it out in just a few minutes

12:09

and that means you can do it regularly

12:11

. Again , we're not committing a lot of time

12:13

. This doesn't even take a lot of energy . This

12:16

is Bird's eye level question and inventory

12:18

taking . But I think taking

12:21

your inventory and checking in

12:23

is what's so important

12:25

. You're creating that connection with yourself

12:27

and what you actually want . Really

12:30

, taking a moment to set aside any

12:32

of the distractions that we have throughout the

12:34

day the limitless distractions and

12:37

ask yourself some questions that only

12:39

you know the answer to , making

12:42

sure that you're happy with the way you're

12:44

directing your life to go , because we

12:46

are the directors of our own movie here . Really

12:49

take that time to appreciate yourself for

12:51

being self-loving and self-respecting

12:54

enough and this is self-care

12:56

really enough to do

12:58

the things that feel great long

13:01

term Not just the

13:03

short term things that feel really good , but the things

13:05

that long term , get you where you want

13:07

to go . And it also allows

13:10

you to catch the stuff that you don't

13:12

really want to be part of your reality

13:15

before it becomes so ingrained

13:17

and so much harder to

13:19

stop or get rid of . To

13:22

do this monthly , that's great or again

13:24

whenever you really need that

13:26

check in to just see what

13:28

the heck is going on . This will help you

13:30

stop being stuck , stop

13:32

having the same month over and over , stop

13:35

ending up with those same frustrations that

13:37

we talked about in last episode , but

13:39

really let you have that power

13:42

over what's going on with you

13:44

. And I know getting honest and vulnerable

13:47

with yourself can feel really

13:49

scary at first , especially if this is something

13:52

that you're not really used to . It's not really

13:54

familiar to you . But here's my promise

13:56

getting a clear enough picture

13:59

with yourself to actually do the

14:01

things that move the needle in your life

14:03

. That's what sets you up for feeling

14:05

so empowered , so

14:07

motivated and like you have that total

14:10

and complete autonomy on your life

14:12

, which is such an incredible

14:14

feeling , because you absolutely

14:16

do . You have autonomy

14:18

over your life and you have every

14:20

opportunity to align with

14:23

who you want to be , with your desired

14:25

identity and who you know you have

14:27

the potential to be . So

14:30

keep this exercise in your toolbox

14:32

, save this episode , write it out for

14:34

when you need it or on a monthly basis

14:36

, and please don't hesitate to let me know

14:39

how it helped you , how

14:41

you got some clarity on the things that you want

14:43

for you , because one belief I will never

14:45

, ever , ever let go of is that you

14:47

absolutely deserve the things

14:49

that you desire for yourself , and I'm

14:51

here to help you create the blueprint on how

14:54

to get it . If you need

14:56

more from me or some specific help

14:58

, you know where to find me . I'm always

15:00

honored to be part of that journey , on a one-on-one

15:02

with you or however we connect

15:04

. Thank you so , so much , and with that

15:06

, I send you off with all of my love

15:09

until next time . But

15:11

all right , my loves , that's where I'll leave us today

15:13

. I want to thank you so much for joining in on

15:15

this conversation with me , and each

15:17

week , every Monday , we're going to be posting a new

15:19

episode , going a little bit deeper into

15:22

the conversation , of what you

15:24

can do to train your brain on purpose

15:26

to really allow for the lifestyle

15:29

that you want to live . Until

15:31

next time , my loves . In the meantime , here's

15:33

to your health and your happiness .