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1:07

more. To people

1:10

claim to know everything about

1:12

something, but only one knows

1:14

anything. They

1:17

want us to change our name. What?

1:20

wait? Who. Disney. Great.

1:23

Robot Mice. That.

1:30

Shows to say let's

1:32

play the game. I.

1:41

Target, Pennsylvania. Got

1:43

big fab are now here's your host

1:45

and the best General Gold Sea and

1:47

I know he didn't weren't goals the.

1:50

How many do you know? I never mind

1:52

of welcome to the big Fab the game

1:54

show where kids choose between the good health

1:56

and long life of truth. And. the

1:58

cold blooded stink by Lots of Lies.

2:00

I'm your host, Debra Goldene. And

2:03

in the studio today is our

2:05

sound effects robot, Lisa, which stands

2:07

for Live in Studio Audience. Thank

2:09

you. Thank you. Thank you

2:11

to all of my fans. I see you.

2:14

I live for you. You complete me.

2:16

Wow. That's so nice of you to

2:18

acknowledge your fans. You know, they really

2:21

do deserve all the robot love I

2:23

can download. Also, I'm

2:25

a true believer in the notion that you get

2:27

back what you give. So

2:30

if anyone would like to give back,

2:32

you can submit your adoring comments at

2:34

bestrobotever.com. Okay, I don't think you're

2:36

supposed to... Stop there? Right. I

2:39

should tell everyone where they can mail their gifts to. Okay,

2:41

no, you're not supposed to tell people that you want gifts.

2:44

So you need to let your fans

2:46

give without solicitation. Okay, that's silly,

2:48

Debra. How will they know that I would

2:51

love for them to send me fuzzy slippers

2:53

and a dog and a walrus? I

2:57

think you should just stick to the

2:59

giving from yourself, from your own heart,

3:01

and not expect anything in return. Fine.

3:05

Okay, so why don't you give us an

3:07

explanation for how our game works? Here's how

3:09

it works. You send me a walrus. No.

3:13

Every week we bring on two grownups. One

3:16

is an expert. The other, it

3:18

pains me to say this, a liar.

3:21

Ouch. Yeah. And it's the job of

3:23

a human child to help us figure out who was

3:25

who because no one's going to spot a liar better

3:27

than a kid. We hope. What

3:30

are we lying about today, Debra? We are

3:32

lying about turtles. Whoa. A slow-moving

3:34

reptile covered by a scaly or

3:37

leathery dome shell. Lisa, do you

3:39

know much about turtles? Turtle

3:42

wax really brings out the shimmer in my metal.

3:45

Oh, no, I'm talking about turtles, the reptiles.

3:47

Okay, well, I'm sure turtles, the reptiles

3:49

would really appreciate a layer of turtle wax

3:51

for their shells. Possibly. Oh,

3:54

let's see if our contestant shares the same opinion.

3:56

Who is our contestant today? Our

3:58

human child contestant is a poor from

4:01

Maine who has a pierced

4:03

ear. Ooh. Noah, Stroud. Wow.

4:06

Hi, Noah, Stroud. How are you? Since

4:08

you have a pierced ear, which ear is

4:10

pierced? My left. Who

4:12

pierced it? What happened? Was it an accident? It

4:15

would not like that happened. If

4:18

it was an accident. This was an intentional

4:20

piercing. Yeah. Did it hurt?

4:23

Yeah. I actually went to a tattoo parlor.

4:26

Whoa. Yeah. Did

4:28

you get a tattoo parlors? Yeah. Did

4:32

you get a tattoo also or is that next year? I

4:34

don't think I will. No? I

4:36

think that's probably why for now. That's probably why. Yeah. All

4:39

right. Well, welcome, Noah. We're so

4:41

glad you're here. We want to learn some

4:43

more fun facts about you, but we are

4:45

going to do it. Playing two truths and

4:47

a lie. So you are going to tell

4:49

us three facts about yourself. Two of

4:51

them will be true. One of them

4:53

will be a lie. Noah Stroud,

4:55

what are your three facts? Okay. So

4:58

my favorite animal is a

5:00

snake. Uh-huh. My favorite sport

5:03

is baseball. Okay. I

5:06

could ride a unicycle for half a mile

5:08

straight. Whoa.

5:11

Okay. I have

5:13

no idea. They all

5:15

sounded like they could be true or false. What do

5:17

you think, Lisa? Okay. Here's

5:19

what I'm thinking. Okay. This

5:21

dude's crazy guy. Wild child gets a deer

5:23

fierce, right? Okay. That kind

5:25

of guy? Like snakes. Okay. Lips wild,

5:27

bad boy kind of guy. Okay.

5:31

Sure. That kind of kid likes the danger

5:33

of riding around on a unicycle. Okay. That

5:35

kind of kid? Very bored by baseball. Not

5:37

exciting enough for him. Interesting. I love this like

5:39

full combat baseball. I don't think so. That baseball

5:42

one is a lie. I am welcome. You're welcome.

5:45

Thank you. Good night. Let's see.

5:48

Okay, Noah, which one of those facts is a lie? He's

5:50

great. Totally baseball. Oh my

5:52

gosh. Because it's so boring. He's so

5:54

good at that. True. Is that why you hate

5:56

baseball? No, I just hate baseball

5:58

because I feel like it's boring. Oh no!

6:01

Okay, we don't want angry

6:03

male about baseball. For some

6:05

people it's very interesting, fascinating,

6:07

mathematical, all those things. Oh yeah,

6:09

that's what I said, boring. But not for you, right

6:11

Noah? Yeah, I do like

6:13

math though. Yeah, math is great. Okay,

6:16

but you do like snakes, do you own a

6:18

snake? I want to. You want to,

6:20

oh my god. Oh, you're gonna be excited,

6:22

look under your chair. No,

6:24

no, he's kidding. And you can ride

6:26

a unicycle? Yes. Wow, did you teach

6:28

yourself? Did somebody help you do that?

6:31

I taught myself, but I'm actually teaching

6:33

a unicycle club at my school.

6:35

That is so cool! I'd

6:38

say that's really special. Okay.

6:40

Alright, and we just got canceled.

6:42

Our first expert is Brandon Carson.

6:45

Brandon, please introduce yourself to Noah.

6:47

Hi Noah, my

6:54

name is Brandon and I work at

6:56

a aquarium where I take care of

6:58

sea turtles. Okay, thank you,

7:00

Brandon. Let's meet our second expert Colleen

7:02

Oldham. Colleen, please introduce yourself

7:05

to Noah. Hi Noah, my

7:07

name is Colleen and I'm

7:09

a marine biologist and

7:11

turtle rescue volunteer. Okay. Look

7:23

at that. Totally cool sounds,

7:26

Lisa. Oh, thanks. It's

7:28

hot feet sound. Okay, that's true. Yes,

7:30

that's when we put our experts on the

7:33

hot seat while they answer Noah's questions. Lisa,

7:35

who should we put on my hot seat

7:37

first? Colleen Oldham. Okay.

7:39

Because I love eating

7:41

old ham. Okay. Yeah,

7:44

because some people eat fresh ham. I

7:46

like old ham because other people

7:48

don't want it, so I get to eat a lot of it. Okay,

7:50

that's a good reason. Alright,

7:52

Noah, what's your first question

7:54

for Colleen? How did you become

7:56

interested in turtles and

7:59

what kind of Premium did you have for your

8:01

job? Well I am I

8:03

to say that I was really into

8:05

the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles as a

8:08

kid. Verrilli, I'm I loved National Geographic.

8:10

I always loved animals but it is

8:12

was much in the turtle shows more

8:14

than the other ones. So I went

8:16

to the University of Hawaii of Honolulu

8:18

to steady marine biology and I still

8:21

work. They're on their faculty. Brendan.

8:24

To me, more about what you know. it's rules. Are

8:26

rules are so long with

8:28

taking care of them of

8:30

the aquarium. I have also

8:32

worked in sea turtle conservation as

8:35

well where I have ah helped

8:37

out loggerhead sea turtles who have

8:40

been abandoned in nests and or

8:42

rehabilitate them and release them back

8:44

into the wild. Ah, We

8:47

get to learn a lot about the

8:49

species by helping them out that way.

8:51

What have you learned about them? I. Personally,

8:54

I have learned that. They.

8:56

Actually will spend the first three

8:58

months of their life after hatching

9:00

or in the exact same waters

9:03

are so they won't go much

9:05

farther than a few miles offshore

9:07

of their hatching sites for the

9:09

first three months, and then they

9:11

will spend the rest of their

9:13

life in the deep ocean. Well,

9:19

For. Both of you might

9:22

think. It. Would

9:25

like to take that first. Online bullying? Yeah,

9:27

well, that certainly. Not very nice.

9:30

Yeah that is the biggest

9:32

threat to turtles right now

9:34

is police and said there

9:36

are other natural predators are

9:38

like bird dogs in other

9:40

animals said try to eat

9:42

other animals okay and friend

9:44

and to do agree with

9:46

that answer do well as

9:48

that answers. will add to that

9:50

answer of i'm so along with

9:52

that humans are also a big

9:54

threat to turtles as well they're

9:56

the ones that mostly cause the

9:58

pollution palm but and they also

10:01

have plenty of other in-ocean predators,

10:03

some on land as well. Okay. Colleen,

10:07

what's the weirdest kind of turtle that

10:09

you've ever heard of? Hmm. Ooh.

10:12

The weirdest kind of turtle I've ever

10:14

heard of is

10:16

probably the Alaskan cold water turtle.

10:19

They're going endangered because of

10:22

climate change, but they

10:24

tend to live in the northern oceans and

10:26

they thrive in cold water. I

10:29

think the North Dakota scarf-wearing

10:31

turtle is pretty weird. You

10:34

can see them because they wear scarves, but then

10:36

they always complain about the scarves and they're like,

10:38

yeah, but I want a green one. I got

10:40

a yellow one. Ted got a yellow one. I

10:42

want a yellow one. I don't know where you

10:44

meet those turtles. North Dakota. Oh, right.

10:46

That's what you said. All right, back to you,

10:48

Noah. To both of you, have you ever been

10:50

bitten by a turtle? Ooh. I'll

10:52

take this one first. Yes,

10:55

I have. I've actually been bitten by

10:57

four different species of turtles. Oh

11:00

my. What'd you do, dude? I

11:02

was only trying to give them some food, but

11:04

sometimes they think your fingers are food. Do

11:07

they have teeth? Some of them do, yes.

11:09

Most of them just have beaks though. Oh,

11:11

it still sounds painful, doesn't it? Yeah,

11:14

the beaks are pretty sharp. Yeah. For

11:16

people listening, are your

11:18

fingers food? No. No,

11:22

okay. All right, Colleen, have you ever

11:24

been bitten by a turtle? Only

11:26

once I was trying to untangle

11:29

the little plastic soda ring from

11:32

a turtle and he bit me. Oh

11:34

no, he didn't understand that you were trying to do

11:36

him a favor. No, just help me help you, buddy.

11:39

Oh. I don't know

11:41

if this is the exact answer, but I've

11:43

bitten five turtles. Why would you do that?

11:45

Just to see if I could. Oh,

11:48

so that's terrible. I hope that that is not true.

11:50

I apologize. Oh no. Species.

11:53

North Dakota scarf. Again. Then

11:56

that Alaskan cold water. Then

11:58

the Albertsons part. lot. Turtle,

12:02

then tomato turtle. Tomato

12:04

turtle? Yeah, sometimes they're turtles inside of

12:06

tomatoes. No, that is not so. That's

12:08

the thing. That's four. South

12:12

American invisible turtle. Yeah.

12:14

That was an accident. To

12:17

Brendan, what is the top of a

12:19

turtle's shell called? The

12:21

top of a turtle's shell is

12:23

called the carapace. Hmm. It's actually

12:26

made out of the same material

12:28

as our fingernails. Whoa. Colleen,

12:31

what determines if a turtle is going

12:33

to be a boy or a girl?

12:35

It can actually depend on

12:37

the temperature around the egg. Wow,

12:39

really? Before it hatches, yeah. If

12:42

the temperatures are colder, males

12:44

tend to be born, the temperatures are warmer, it tends

12:46

to be a lady turtle. That's

12:49

why climate change is actually affecting them because

12:52

there can't just be

12:54

old girls, then they can't have more

12:57

baby turtles. That's exactly right. To both

13:00

of you. What

13:02

was the funniest thing that's

13:04

happened in your job? So

13:06

the funniest thing that's happened to me at my

13:08

job, I was helping one

13:10

of the green sea turtles get

13:13

out of its tank so we

13:15

could do veterinary checks on it

13:17

and turtles are way better in the

13:19

water than I am so he was

13:22

able to pull me across the tank. I

13:26

went for a little bit

13:28

of a ride. Oh no. Was it fun? It

13:30

was, yes. Well

13:35

I think the funniest thing I found out about

13:37

turtles while

13:39

doing some research was that

13:41

turtles mate for life but they

13:44

also have little wedding ceremonies. What?

13:46

Yeah. I was officiated. Biologists

13:50

have seen members of the same group and they

13:52

sort of line up and touch heads with the

13:54

little turtle couple and they get

13:57

married. Cute. I just want to say if any turtles are listening

13:59

and you want to on the show and get

14:01

married, it would be our pleasure to host you.

14:03

Definitely. And then I get to keep him. No.

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15:46

It's time for the Shorts on Fire round

15:48

when our experts have to answer as many questions

15:50

as they can before time runs out. Experts,

15:53

you're going to have to rely

15:55

on turtle recall to answer these

15:57

questions. Noah, let's Let's start with

16:00

Brendan. You can ask your shorts

16:02

on fire questions now. How

16:05

long do the oldest turtles live? They

16:08

can be over 100 years old. Name

16:10

one of the four teenage

16:12

mutant ninja turtles. Donatello. What

16:15

is the word for turtle in Spanish?

16:18

Portugal. Turtle pulse. Sea turtles

16:20

were around during the time of the dinosaurs.

16:23

True. Name three species of

16:25

turtle. Leatherback, green,

16:27

and loggerhead. The

16:29

type of turtle is wind effect.

16:32

Uh, pass. Motorboat turtle. Go

16:35

ahead, Noah. How long can

16:37

sea turtles hold their breath underwater? Upwards

16:39

to five hours. Name one animal slower

16:41

than turtle. A

16:45

slug. What is the name of

16:48

the sea turtle in Finding Nemo? It

16:50

sounds like a surfing cave. Uh,

16:53

crust. And

16:56

time. Time. Sorry guys, time. Okay.

17:00

Lisa, please restart the timer for

17:02

Colleen. Okay, but it just ended. You sure?

17:04

Yes, I am sure. Okay, I'll reset it.

17:07

Okay, Noah. You can ask

17:10

Colleen your shorts on fire

17:12

questions now. How many baby

17:14

turtles can a mother turtle

17:16

have in a lifeguard? About a hundred.

17:19

Name one predator of turtle.

17:22

Fire ants. Are turtles

17:24

warm-blooded or cold-blooded? How

17:26

deep can sea turtles die? Ten

17:29

thousand leaves. What is the

17:31

lower shell of a turtle?

17:35

Called the basement. How

17:37

many different species of turtles

17:39

exist? Ah, past.

17:42

Do all turtles have shells? No,

17:45

the Romanian naked turtle. How

17:47

heavy is the heaviest turtle?

17:51

Eyes over two thousand pounds. Name

17:54

an ingredient in turtle

17:56

candy. Marshmallows. And

17:59

time. All the time I

18:01

would settle for marshmallows. Okay. Well,

18:04

you look a bit shell-shocked, experts, but

18:06

I think you did well. It's

18:13

decision time. Our contestant, Noah, has

18:16

to consider the shell-lection of facts

18:18

he's heard. Noah, who do you

18:20

think is our liar-liar, Pamp on

18:23

Fire? I think it's Colleen. Whoa.

18:26

Why do you think Colleen is our

18:28

liar? Well, a

18:30

lot of the shorts on fire

18:32

were false. Let's

18:35

see. Okay, interesting. So you

18:37

think you know some facts about

18:40

this topic that she did not know where

18:42

she lied about. Okay. Will

18:45

the actual turtle expert please tell us

18:47

who you are? I

18:50

am Brendan. I am the turtle expert.

18:52

You got it right, Noah. That is

18:54

right. Brendan Karski is an aquarist at

18:57

the Maritime Aquarium in Norwalk, Connecticut, who

18:59

is responsible for a loggerhead sea turtle

19:01

conservation program. Amazing. Thank you for your

19:03

service, sir. Okay. It's

19:05

time to review all the facts

19:07

and turn them turtle. Brendan, what

19:09

information did Colleen share that came

19:12

from a complete loggerhead? Definitely

19:15

the marriage. They

19:17

do not mate for life. They don't get

19:20

married? No, they do not. I

19:22

want my presents back. You know, some of us

19:25

wish they did, but they

19:27

don't. What else? I

19:30

might be wrong on this one, but I think the turtle

19:32

candy doesn't actually have marshmallow in it. It

19:34

doesn't, no. I still want marshmallows. Pecan's

19:37

caramel and chocolate. I'll take that. Yeah.

19:40

And the other thing is I know

19:42

the bottom of a turtle's shell is

19:44

actually called plastron. Very good. Not

19:47

the basement. Right. And what

19:49

about this one? Do all turtles have shells?

19:51

Is there a turtle that doesn't have a

19:53

shell? Well, the leatherback and a couple of

19:56

other turtles have soft shells. Oh.

19:59

But I think. that they'll have

20:01

shells in some way. In some way.

20:03

Yeah. Brendan, is that correct? That

20:05

is correct. There is that thing as the

20:08

Romanian naked turtle though, right? No,

20:10

I made that up. What? That was a good lie.

20:12

I just ordered five of them up there, and it...

20:14

Oh no. Oh no. Get your money

20:16

back. It was your money. I wonder what you'll get. I

20:18

wonder what you'll get instead of the

20:20

Romanian naked turtle. Right. It's a surprise. I

20:23

guess we'll find out. So, and we also,

20:25

you mentioned a predator as Amps. Is

20:28

that a thing? Is that true? Well, I

20:30

know crabs. Or... Yeah, uh-huh.

20:32

I don't think ants are. What do you say,

20:34

Brendan? For sea turtles, they

20:37

definitely wouldn't be eating ants, but

20:39

some terrestrial turtles would eat ants.

20:41

But would ants eat them? Oh no, ants would not eat

20:43

them. No. No. Great.

20:46

Not at all. Not so much. Okay, and Colleen,

20:48

what facts did you share that were turtle disasters?

20:53

There's no such thing as an Alaskan cold

20:55

water turtle. Oh, that was a lie too?

20:57

Yeah. Wow. I'm

20:59

so sorry. There's one other thing.

21:01

Yeah. A turtle can

21:03

weigh way more than 100 eggs. What

21:07

you were thinking of is a turtle could only

21:09

lay 100 eggs in one hatchet. Oh.

21:15

Wow. Thank you. You are a real

21:18

expert. No wonder you got this right, Noah.

21:20

That's amazing. Anything else, Colleen? Gosh,

21:22

well, it was a lot of facts about myself. So

21:25

were lies. But you

21:27

made up some pretty good turtle names. I like those names.

21:29

Yeah. You know, you could

21:31

call me out on it because it's the name of

21:33

a country and a turtle. I

21:37

also said that sea turtles can dive 10,000 leagues

21:40

under the sea. Oh, right. That's not true.

21:42

What do you say, Brendan? Do you know?

21:44

I think the deepest they can go is about 1000 feet.

21:47

Meters, actually. 1000 meters. Okay, not

21:49

so much. I don't even know how much a league is. How

21:51

much is a league? I don't know. It's the

21:54

name of a book. Right. But I don't know

21:56

how many measure that. Yeah. I'm

21:58

wondering, you were just right all. around

22:00

Noah. You are right, right, and

22:02

also very right. Well, we've come

22:04

to the end of our episode

22:06

so it's time to celebrate our

22:08

contestant Noah. Thank you to our

22:10

expert and liar Brendan and Colleen

22:12

and to Lisa for her snapping

22:14

sound and many thanks to our

22:17

listeners tuning in

22:19

to the Big Biz.

22:21

So celebrate the truth. The

22:23

Big Biz is a production of

22:25

Gen Z Media. Check us out

22:27

online at bestrobotever.com to hear more

22:29

great food. Find out how

22:31

you can participate and leave questions for me

22:33

to answer on Ask Lisa. And

22:36

now it's time for Debra to buy me

22:38

some turtles. For more

22:40

awesome pods, go to gzmshows.com. It's

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