0:05

Hey, yeah, that's me, Stuart Wellington from the

0:07

Flophouse Podcast. And this is an episode of

0:09

the Flophouse Podcast, and I am one of

0:11

the hosts of the Flophouse Podcast, and this

0:13

is one of the Flophouse mini episodes. That's

0:16

where we normally watch a bad movie and talk about

0:18

it, but on one of these minis, we're going to

0:20

be doing something a little bit different. As always, I

0:23

am joined by my two regular co-hosts, Dan McCoy. Say

0:25

hello, Dan. Hello, Dan. And

0:27

my other co-host, Elliot Kalin. Say hello, Elliot. Hello,

0:30

Elliot. Now, today, instead

0:32

of doing a watching a bad movie and talking

0:34

about it, today we are actually going to be

0:36

doing a little bit of business. We're going to

0:38

take our listeners behind the curtain because

0:40

this is the first annual,

0:42

this is the first ever

0:44

shareholders meeting for the new

0:46

venture, the Flophouse Bar

0:49

and Grill. That's right,

0:51

the Flophouse is moving into branded

0:53

restaurant territory. Okay. So

0:56

we need to have a meeting so that we can get this

0:58

business off the ground. Interesting to learn

1:00

about this now. I know. Yeah,

1:02

you haven't checked your bank account because you've already invested.

1:05

Unfortunately, I know I

1:07

shouldn't have signed those papers giving Stewart

1:10

power of attorney over my finances. Yeah,

1:12

it's too bad. I mean, you're kind

1:14

of a pay pig in this situation. So to

1:17

help this... It's

1:19

a Fin Dom thing, I'm pretty sure. Oh,

1:22

okay. Then that's fine. Yeah. To

1:25

help this process along, I have brought in an expert.

1:27

That's right. Alex, why don't you

1:29

throw in a bar rescue guitar staying here? For

1:34

over 30 years in the

1:36

hospitality business, Charlene Wellington is

1:38

a legend in her field.

1:40

In Brooklyn, she is a giant in

1:43

the industry of bartending and bar owning.

1:46

That's right. For her, running a

1:48

bar is not just a business, it's

1:50

a science. Hey, Charlene, how

1:52

you doing? Hi, I'm doing great. So

1:55

We brought you in as an expert to

1:58

help us with this venture. How Do you

2:00

feel about it? the odds you want to

2:02

introduce yourself do well when I get your

2:04

bona fide. Other than a bona Fides have

2:06

already given you know think I think he

2:08

did a good job. Okay, that's nice to

2:10

hear I said assess I i I just

2:12

live a preschool to them and so of.

2:16

We're. Going to be talking about our restaurant business

2:18

Now if you're interested. Movies while you're lucky because

2:20

we're gonna talk about movies of front because I

2:22

feel like the best way to really ticked as

2:24

new venture off the ground His first the kind

2:26

of exam and. Popular.

2:28

Our restaurants and movies.

2:32

I must set up or assesses. Ah, I'm

2:34

good at running meetings here Guys I know

2:37

normally as I mean be meeting organizer

2:39

category but this is a new role for

2:41

me so we'll see how I'm doing.

2:43

So we're going to talk about restaurants and

2:45

bars that we know from the movies and

2:48

Tv. and obviously if you guys can think

2:50

of some examples that I might miss, feel

2:52

free to chime in. But the I'd

2:54

handle their in Santa. Some.

2:57

All Right Arm Disorder to talk about example

2:59

so that we can get an idea of

3:02

what we think. Would. Best served

3:04

the Flop House brand as right. Okay

3:06

so Alley Cats is offering their Taco

3:08

Bell and Time Com What are some

3:10

Wow, what do you look? What do

3:13

you like about So what I like

3:15

of a Taco Bell physically the time

3:17

toppers in his it's Fine Dining is

3:19

the only restaurants. Ah, it's implied that

3:21

it destroyed all the other restaurants at

3:24

some point into the mobile conquer them.

3:26

So the name is and a malleable.

3:28

You know he said it's mean a

3:30

number of different things. It's flexible. it's

3:32

I. Can do different types of things as much

3:35

as tacos. I mean this is a world where

3:37

to be the only one of toilet paper anymore

3:39

Soon as we're Taco Bell serves the of certainly

3:41

not something we would need a lot of toilet

3:43

paper to don't have anymore which is unlike current

3:45

Taco Bell from I understand. yeah no way to

3:47

talk about. Let we all remember there's the ad

3:49

campaign Moss puppy is it's worthless at this as

3:51

I don't hurt me as a Bond yell at

3:53

the hospital. Bill live myself and I reiterated joining

3:55

talk about a runny nose and yet it was.

3:58

It was poop Moss says of the them. Our

4:01

feather to eat a little bit Uk.

4:03

So unlike unlike how mine turned into

4:05

French almost instantly, I couldn't even conceive

4:08

of a sanitary through one slogan. Yep,

4:11

Ah, Taco Bell in Demolition Man. Any other

4:13

thoughts: A sandwich mean I said Time Cup

4:15

earlier. I pods as them into Blue Eye

4:17

or knows he has a double deuce and

4:19

Roadhouse that's perfect. That was get that's the

4:21

first on my list. So again honor of

4:23

London Tomorrow Now in Devilish Men or Times

4:25

Off As I said, a movie with they

4:27

Don't Actually set aside a well. They

4:30

are. So I think of Time Cup is

4:32

much more. I think that the other animals

4:34

as the Taco Bell they appear that way

4:36

and or any and to answer I wouldn't

4:38

What's your favorite? More Restaurant. Owed.

4:41

Me and my yoga is Shirley I

4:43

exit any of you that's the joy

4:45

of Upon it's an improv access. I

4:48

remember really easy at the mall lot

4:50

like least I murderers. Then I'll talk

4:52

about this. We

4:55

go to who lands We go to Friday's

4:57

an underwriter character that owned a restaurant. we

5:00

were eating your restaurant in the mall. With.

5:03

Saw wait what's not not fud records that

5:05

was in and them all with no A.

5:07

Ruby Tuesdays may not be some. They don't

5:09

offer Ruby Tuesdays like lunch. like lunch salad

5:11

bar. I just it's too bad that Alan

5:13

Moore never got to do the League of

5:15

Extraordinary Gentlemen. Sit in. The world of France

5:18

has restaurants as defined. The seats really? Tuesday's

5:20

land then again and T G I Fridays

5:22

teaming up together. Oh man, I'm a about

5:24

nearly scratching the surface there buddy. Yeah, I

5:26

had some of the classic sort of you know

5:29

mall. Good. Foods.

5:31

Not like you know, like a meal. but

5:34

I remember. Being. Given an Orange

5:36

Julius as he says immediately be was this

5:38

I don't care for her see that's something

5:40

I only knew from. Preferences. And

5:42

Tv shows move without. I first heard of and

5:44

Sullivan. It's of the Adventures of Pete and Pete

5:46

and I thought of as into that thing in

5:48

the world have been p It's never a I've

5:50

never encountered when an actual and you're impressed at

5:52

how good the branding was that it sounded so

5:54

real. Yeah, this and a super real Orange Julius

5:56

does sound like an amazing name. Yeah, be like

5:58

all the Julius as I. In real life

6:00

aren't orange so this must be I

6:03

made up. When. I am not going to

6:05

the mall with my parents and started going. With

6:07

my friends I'm user to get room

6:09

when you stop being a him surgeon

6:11

I'm really nervous. Yes. Aren't

6:13

silly, it's was to something we would walk by

6:15

and we never. Like. Noticed it

6:18

but my friends would be like this:

6:20

Get an Orange Julius to wash down

6:22

my i'm assuming pack of cigarettes. They're

6:25

smoking obviously inside. Of

6:27

are all yet? Just take a bite

6:29

of an aunt and pencil status around

6:31

Cigarette Arizona far enough as is and

6:34

what? Roller skating to the of I

6:36

screening personalities personally and rollers for your

6:38

house and notes and are no yes

6:40

tilt it was the brain are detail

6:43

on us. Booksellers, We

6:45

talked about on a beach Boys were they

6:47

were pretty. Was the Kb toy day be

6:49

toys. The of them has the same. It's

6:51

another restaurant out. By. Her

6:54

displeasure with the houses where. Are

6:57

you talking about some ground rules?

6:59

So I weren't doing anything having

7:01

to size and finance open a

7:04

road house so thats when I

7:06

look and less. Clearly

7:08

I mean I've I feel like this from a

7:10

fairly clear is not. So let's talk about the

7:12

Double Deuce the titular Your Own House from the

7:14

movie Road How The Original. He really isn't us

7:16

and we're not going to talk about the Road

7:19

House from the Roadhouse will be to say and

7:21

do that to dilemma with no throws her. I

7:23

like A and the first thing we need to

7:25

do with higher security. Yes, That's that

7:27

will now that. I would say that

7:29

if if the flop house. Bar. And

7:32

Grill is a rowdy roadhouse.

7:34

I. feel like that movie has taught us

7:36

that we should just hired unfortunately we

7:38

can't hire the best in the does

7:40

dalton because he went on to start

7:42

that book seen in the mall be

7:44

dolphins it's now your hands looks ls

7:47

and can appreciate higher rowdy roadhouse piper

7:49

to says not an actual person now

7:51

now now but if he was the

7:53

now the things that i feel like

7:55

that answers with bathrooms in general are

7:57

expensive i think sir and i are

7:59

limited dealing with bounce and door guys.

8:01

But there's a lot of things to find what

8:03

you want. You need to find someone who

8:05

can bounce. And that's not easy to do. They need that

8:08

gummy bears potion from the cartoon. Kigger? Or

8:10

some flubber. Yeah. You

8:12

have to be a mind-perfector. Kigger can be hurt bouncy. Can

8:15

bounce pretty well. I mean, the bottom is made out of

8:17

rubber and the top is made out of springs, yeah. So

8:20

some other things about the Double

8:22

Dues, it's rowdy. It's busy. It's

8:24

popular. You have a house, you

8:26

have various fans performing. Yeah, in-house

8:28

music. They're playing

8:30

house music. That doesn't have a chain link fence to protect

8:32

them. Expenses, expenses, expenses. We're talking

8:35

all the time this year. Yeah,

8:37

they seem to be saving their money by

8:40

making their beer bottles, however, out of

8:42

the thinnest possible glass. They just shatter.

8:45

Well, usually bars go underneath their own beer bottles

8:47

is the thing. That's true, and you're

8:49

not even a professional. Thank you. Yes,

8:52

just from my experience, just my limited experience

8:54

as a patron of a restaurant, I see

8:56

that normally they don't, not everything is grown

8:58

or manufactured in. Maybe they're purchasing from a

9:00

subpar vendor. Again, usually buy, I

9:02

mean, maybe they're buying from a bottle

9:04

or uses the one, but usually you're

9:07

buying from the brewery, I assume. Also, it's best

9:09

to keep the beer inside the bottle

9:12

than have it be outside the bottle until

9:14

you wanna drink it. Until you wanna drink it. It's very hard to

9:16

drink it when you fill in the bottle. Yeah, that's true. But

9:19

you don't wanna lick it out of a puddle of

9:21

broken glass. No, that's true. Not unless

9:23

you're the character Killer Kane in the movie,

9:25

was it the ninth? Prophecy

9:28

of Everwood? The ninth configuration? The configuration with

9:30

Stacy Keach, yeah. Where they make him lick

9:33

the beer off the wood floor of the

9:35

bar, because they have to unleash the

9:38

killer inside of it. Yeah, and

9:40

I feel like Stacy Keach gives

9:42

off the energy that he would do that anyway. So

9:48

Stacy Keach is our bouncer at this Roadhouse. Stacy

9:51

Keach and Tigger, two entrances. Now,

9:53

there's your movie. Is the two of them, are

9:55

the two of them are bouncers doing all of

9:57

the get along? They work well together.

10:00

Yeah, Stacy Keach and Tigger. Yeah, and

10:03

And rabbit has to be involved some way cuz

10:05

he need a fuddy-duddy, right? Yeah. Yeah You

10:09

look for in a bouncer's a fuddy-duddy Rabbit

10:11

I see with the music Booker and he's always great.

10:13

Yeah Okay,

10:17

okay, so that's Roadhouse we kind of an idea

10:20

what a roadhouse is Okay,

10:23

let's move on to the world of television

10:25

Okay Cheers

10:30

Hours above I might be familiar.

10:33

Yeah, so who's the best in cheers?

10:35

Who's the best? The

10:44

funniest to me is coach but I don't want to

10:47

hire coach he's bad at his job You

10:49

don't want to hire an older? American

10:52

I mean, I feel like everyone in cheers is

10:54

bad at their job That's

10:57

even Carla Carlos. She's the worst

11:00

She builds a pretty unwelcoming atmosphere and this is the

11:03

kind of bar where people wear sports jackets when they

11:05

drink there, you know True. I mean Different bars when

11:07

you go there and you're like I want to get

11:09

yelled at by the by the people work here I

11:11

want to be in right and that's not I feel

11:13

like that's not the crowd for that, you know so

11:16

I Feel

11:18

like at least if we are going to

11:21

take lessons away from cheers I

11:23

think the location is lovely, but you're saying

11:25

that maybe we should train our staff differently

11:28

I think if there's a way for the

11:30

staff to keep that personality without say Forgetting

11:33

what people order or insulting them when they deliver

11:35

their order I think that'd be great But the

11:38

the location is great right in the heart of

11:40

Austin underneath a restaurant that people need to wait

11:42

for their tables They go down and get a

11:44

bit of a bull to newcomers Yeah

11:49

I think there is a guard store

11:51

Indian in the front. I think we lose that but Yeah,

11:57

and I do want a lot of old newspapers

11:59

on the walls for sure. Is he

12:01

saying Malone like a famous like bowler or something? No, he

12:03

was a... he was a... He

12:05

was a professional baseball player. He was a relief pitcher.

12:07

Yeah, if we... Also, we can't have

12:09

our bartenders sleeping with all the customers. Well, I'm

12:12

just... What do you mean they don't have them?

12:14

If the face of the bar could be a

12:16

professional athlete, that'd be great. It brings in the

12:18

fans. If he could not be in the sort

12:20

of sexual harassment relationship with both

12:22

his employees and the patrons,

12:25

that would be great. Yeah. That'd

12:27

be great. Yeah. I

12:29

mean, this is all... this whole episode is T.M.

12:31

us, so nobody can feel like it. And I

12:33

think Rabbit could also be a good human resources

12:35

person. He's a little nervous to call in Sam

12:38

along and talk to him. Yeah, Rabbit would be

12:40

great at that. Oh, man, I love it. Okay,

12:42

so we've learned some stuff from Cheers. Does anyone

12:44

have a... Did anyone... Nobody really

12:47

came up with a definitive answer as to who's the

12:49

best Cheers. I think coach. Who's the best? Coach, okay.

12:51

Coach is the best Cheers. Coach is the best Cheers.

12:53

It seems like... Coach is his first

12:55

name? Ernie. Yeah, Ernie Pantuso.

12:57

Okay. That's his last name, Dan. His

13:00

first name is not Ernie Pantuso. I'm

13:02

just giving the full name, man. That's

13:04

for the world of movies. The restaurant

13:06

from Ratatouille.

13:11

Okay. Oh, hey, fancy.

13:13

Very fancy. Okay. What

13:15

can we... what do we like? What are our... what are

13:17

our... what are our thorns? I feel

13:19

like the health inspector is not going to

13:22

like that the food is prepared by rats.

13:24

Probably not. And we never see him washing

13:26

hands, do we? The rat? Yeah. I

13:29

mean, if the rat is not handling the food

13:32

usually, he's pulling the hair of the chef who

13:35

is then... who's then making the

13:37

food. But that chef has like a

13:39

ton of rat poop under his hat. Yeah, I

13:41

mean, that he has a rat in his hair is

13:43

a no-go. You don't want that guy working at your restaurant.

13:45

Yeah. No matter how brilliant the rat

13:48

is or how good a human puppet he is, you know.

13:50

It also seems like a

13:52

very unreliable way to steer any

13:54

cooking. Right

13:56

now it seems to be working great for

13:58

them. But, you know, if a rat was

14:00

pulling... on my hair, it wouldn't immediately translate

14:02

for me into action. Like I wouldn't necessarily

14:04

know what the rat wants. I

14:06

mean the action of your head to get the rat off

14:08

and probably yelling, yeah. Well no, I

14:11

don't know. Yeah, I don't know.

14:13

Have you tried having a rat drive

14:15

you around like a little man? Have I tried it? Have

14:17

I tried it? Like what, Norvit or whatever? Maybe you should

14:19

try it. No, I haven't tried it yet. You've driven like

14:21

a human car with a rat driver. Like Ratthink. A

14:24

vuvu? Yeah, no, no, that's a different rat thing.

14:27

I think, but it is better, it's cleaner and

14:29

better than in the Muffets Take Manhattan

14:31

where the rats are just handling the food

14:33

and also skating on butter pats on a

14:35

frying pan. You know, they're what, bicycling in

14:37

the soup. All that is, yeah, you don't

14:40

want that either. Okay,

14:42

so we understand that, we probably don't want

14:44

a restaurant where we rely on animals. Big

14:46

old rat employees. Yeah, rat employees. Okay, that's

14:49

actually a pretty good point. But maybe we're

14:51

not completely. Tiggers and rabbits are okay. Tiggers

14:53

and rabbits are okay. Tigger, he's outside the

14:55

bar. He's at the door. You know,

14:57

he's not fully outside, but he's at the door.

14:59

Maybe there's a little entryway that he can be

15:01

in. And rabbit, he just in the back room,

15:04

he's not handling the food, yeah. So also not

15:06

the diner from Muppets Take Manhattan then? Exactly, not

15:08

the diner from Muppets Take Manhattan. Well, is there

15:10

anything good about the diner from Muppets Take Manhattan?

15:12

There's a bunch of Muppets in it, so that's

15:14

fun. Okay, yeah, that's- Maybe a restaurant has Muppets

15:16

in it. That'd be great as their patrons there

15:19

mostly, but I think that'd be great, yeah. If

15:21

it's a Muppet friendly restaurant, yeah. But

15:23

I feel like they're unreliable about paying

15:25

for things, right? Or am I just

15:27

casting aspersions on Muppets in general? I

15:29

don't think they're that good with money,

15:31

and also often they get hit by

15:33

taxi cabs and lose their memory and

15:35

have to be found again at the

15:37

same diner. I mean, often, like, you

15:39

know, one out of

15:41

three- More than zero, more than zero times.

15:43

Movies of, I don't count the later

15:45

ones. Oh, wow. So Stuart, I had

15:47

a movie I wanted to introduce. Also, as long

15:50

as we're talking about restaurants in New York specifically,

15:52

like the Muppets Take Manhattan diner, is there in

15:54

Gremlins 2, there is a Canadian restaurant that

15:57

I've learned. Yeah. What I like about it is it

15:59

knows its concept. and it sticks with that

16:01

concept very closely. It's got a clear core

16:03

conception of what they serve there. Where the

16:05

servers dresses mounties, right? The servers dresses mounties,

16:07

there's a lot of stuffed bears and trout

16:10

on the walls. They serve a chocolate mousse,

16:12

which is a mousse's head made out of

16:14

chocolate. They serve mousse and beer. It's

16:16

very, it is a, I mean, I have to

16:18

assume poutine is on the menu, somewhere in there.

16:20

Yeah, I have to assume, yeah, exactly. And the

16:22

rest of the dessert menu is provided by Tim

16:24

Hortons, I would imagine. Probably, with a markup. It

16:26

was harder to get Tim Hortons in New York

16:28

at the time, would a

16:30

Gremlins restaurant have to close before midnight?

16:32

That's a good point, Elliot. That's a great

16:34

question. Often restaurants do close before midnight. So

16:36

I think that won't be too big of

16:38

an issue. That's true. Yeah.

16:41

Yeah, I feel like, in fact, with

16:43

the way the restaurants are closing

16:46

earlier these days, it's doing some

16:48

work to prevent Gremlin infestation. That's

16:50

why Eric Adams introduced that regulation,

16:53

yeah. If you can't feed

16:55

them after midnight, how long is the window until

16:57

it's the next day and you can feed

16:59

them? Yeah, that's one of the big concerns. Dan,

17:01

I think, is an expert on this so much.

17:03

Dan, you're a Gremologist. What do you say? Yeah.

17:07

Well, it's been brought up sort of in a

17:09

scene in Gremlins 2, the new batch, where they

17:11

do make fun of the vagueness.

17:14

Yeah, they talk about it here in an airplane

17:16

crossing time zones. Does that count? Things like that.

17:18

I'm asking questions that have been asked before. I'm

17:20

sorry. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,

17:22

no, no, important question. The question has

17:25

been asked before, doesn't mean it's been answered. And it

17:27

means it's again, yeah. Who's the

17:29

best at Cheers? Or who's the

17:31

boss? Who's the best at Cheers? Okay,

17:35

so I think

17:38

we all like some things about the

17:40

Canadian restaurant in Gremlins. We're gonna keep,

17:42

this is all gonna be helpful because

17:44

in the second half of this meeting,

17:46

we're gonna really hammer in what we're

17:48

doing. But I think it's best for

17:50

us to brainstorm a little, get some

17:52

ideas of inspiration for our own venture.

17:55

So let's talk about the restaurant

17:57

from The Bear. Hit, hit show.

18:00

Hooloo Season

18:02

one or season two cuz they're two

18:04

different restaurants. Let's talk about them both

18:07

Which one do you think the people of that

18:09

neighborhood of Chicago are more excited about a recently

18:12

priced beef restaurant? We're a very fancy

18:14

restaurant Yeah, a legendary sandwich restaurant that

18:16

you could just stop in and get

18:18

something for lunch whenever you want Yeah,

18:20

we're a fancy restaurant. We need a

18:22

reservation I'm

18:24

gonna go with I did miss that sandwich restaurant

18:27

in season two I did not like that turn

18:29

that they took on the trailer for

18:31

this new one. It seems like He's

18:34

changing up his menu all the time.

18:36

Look look. I don't want

18:38

that as a consumer, you know I

18:40

want to know that there are a few Reliable

18:42

things on the menu that if they're good,

18:44

they're gonna be good. You know, he's chasing

18:46

his yeah, you're so use all over the

18:48

place Yeah, you're saying cuz you went to

18:50

a nice restaurant in in London and you

18:52

said you were mad that they took the

18:54

chicken nuggies off the menu, right With

18:58

with dipping he wants a change They

19:01

weren't the same shapes anymore. I want a

19:03

star shapes and they Right,

19:06

you're like I want my food to be congratulations

19:12

Yeah, I Want the sky

19:14

to be empty of stars because they're all in

19:16

my on my plate on my right. I'm ready.

19:18

Yeah now Yeah,

19:20

so Charlene How likely do you think

19:22

if somebody were to do that with

19:25

a classic restaurant like a classic beef

19:27

restaurant? Turn it from

19:29

a sandwich shop to a fancy restaurant How long would it

19:31

take before one of the old regulars just walks in and

19:33

spits on the floor? Immediately,

19:37

yeah Yeah,

19:41

I mean I will say this

19:43

the second restaurant seems like it's a lot more

19:45

pleasant to work in Then the first

19:48

one though And

19:51

he got second the walk-in, right? Well, that's his own

19:53

that's his own mistake He did that was fool that

19:55

was him foolish. I was that was a plate. He

19:57

wasn't didn't keep spinning. Yeah that

19:59

user error. Yeah. As an

20:01

expert, I feel like that whole second season

20:03

was a mistake. You had a concept that

20:06

was working. It was simple. Everybody

20:08

knew what they were going to get. And

20:10

then he took it and he turned it

20:12

around and now they're like making cherry foam

20:14

and nobody wants that. So how

20:16

long did we spend arguing about the, how

20:18

likely it is that you could get stuck

20:20

in your own walk-in like that? I

20:23

mean, if you're walking, I mean,

20:25

it should have a safety feature. You

20:28

should not be able to get stuck in your walk-in like

20:30

that. Even Christopher walk-in is a safety feature so you can't get

20:32

stuck in it. And

20:34

not try. It's the size of his

20:36

orifices. That's the safety

20:38

feature. That was

20:40

delightfully surreal and turned on his shoulder. I'd

20:45

say, I'd say maybe

20:48

it's a big sport. It

20:51

could be his ear, you know. So, but, uh,

20:53

Charlie just saying there should be a safety feature

20:55

on that walk-in freezer. There's the safety

20:57

feature on most walk-in freezers that,

21:00

um, you would have to lock somebody in

21:02

on purpose because there's like, maybe that's what

21:04

happened. Maybe that's what we'll find out in season

21:06

three. Maybe we will. Or it could have just

21:09

been really old and the safety feature is broken

21:11

and they taped it up. And yeah, do you

21:13

think they'll go do a deep dive into the

21:15

safety features and structure of this walk-in cooling? Probably.

21:17

That's probably what the next season's all about. I

21:20

mean, if ever there was a restaurant that should

21:22

not have passed its exams, it feels like it's

21:24

that one. Like that thing was really held together

21:26

with, with, you know, yeah, tape and baling

21:29

wire and stuff like that. But

21:31

that's the business, right? Someone got stuck in

21:33

the walk-in on the Brady Bunch once. Uh,

21:36

can you explain the afraid of walk-in

21:38

cooler in the Brady Bunch? Well, if Sam's

21:40

butcher, he had a walk-in

21:43

cooler. Oh, Sam and Alice went into the freezer

21:45

to have sex in the middle of the day. And

21:47

they got stuck in there. The only cool boy might've

21:50

been Greg that got stuck in there. Whoa, he was

21:52

going to have sex with Greg. It

21:54

was a little bit of

21:56

time. Yeah

22:02

Okay, and did we did we cover

22:04

who's the best the bear Brady wants

22:06

to show that took a brave anti

22:08

Jesse James stance So

22:14

we did we decide who the best the bear

22:16

is the best the bear The

22:19

bear from the movie the bear probably yeah,

22:22

that's pretty real bear. Yeah. Yeah, I'm

22:24

a blue guy personally, but that's me I'm

22:27

a balloon to Wdw died Just

22:30

just drop the call Man

22:33

you guys picked all the best bears. Yeah,

22:35

you have to pick a lousy. I have to pick a

22:38

terrible bear, huh? You

22:41

got a You

22:43

got Paddington Yeah,

22:46

I don't I didn't see that all right, I'll

22:48

take Paddington but blue is kind of my

22:50

favorite blue blue rocks And I'm

22:52

gonna talk about In

22:55

five lanes, you know I like I

22:58

like the one that sings bear necessities. Yeah

23:01

Yeah, that's a little on the blue has a job You

23:04

know like that like the great thing about jungle

23:06

book balloons. He just floats down the river. Yeah. Yeah

23:09

Yeah, let me bear that for Dan eventually you got

23:11

to get a job as a jungle Wow

23:15

Of life come to you somebody's been somebody's

23:18

been look at her rock build over here

23:20

prickly pear Contributing

23:22

to society Dan we need workers not

23:24

bears There's

23:30

only so much you can get knowing that you pick

23:32

up the pawpaw with the claw and not the paw

23:34

Dan So it's great that

23:36

we're talking about animated shows Bob's

23:40

burgers Hamburger

23:43

restaurant also I like the bear in some

23:45

ways. Yeah kind of like the bear in

23:47

some ways today ever Did

23:50

they ever and I guess it's a movie

23:52

too. They made a movie about Wait,

23:57

so they ever do a fine

23:59

dining episode where Bob's burgers became a fine

24:01

dining restaurant? Probably

24:04

I haven't, I don't watch it as regularly

24:06

as I want. So I watched it weekly for like eight

24:08

years and then I haven't watched it as regularly. So

24:10

maybe what do we, what do we like about the

24:12

Bob's burgers? You know what I like about Bob's burgers?

24:15

They've been, they've been at it a long time,

24:17

but they still manage to put a new special

24:19

up on the board every week. And it shows

24:21

that they care. The regular

24:23

menu stays the same, but they have

24:25

that new special. That's a nice balance.

24:28

And it's usually timely. Yeah. We're funny.

24:30

It's basically just burgers, but Bob clearly

24:32

really loves burgers. He's focused on his

24:34

core competencies and you know, that's the

24:37

business. Well, there's passion as opposed to

24:39

the bear where he has a passion

24:41

for cooking, but he's trying to paint

24:44

the restaurant and yelling. That's true. Bob

24:46

has a passion for cooking burgers and

24:48

also not yelling. He's very quiet as

24:50

any John Benjamin voiced character would be

24:53

is going to, you know, under, under

24:55

a moating. Uh, but also that

24:57

I feel like, yeah, it's just more comfortable in

24:59

that space. You know, I'd rather go eat

25:01

a Bob's burgers than eat at the bear

25:03

fancy or the bear beef sandwich

25:07

or the bear, the animal, uh, movie. Yeah.

25:11

And Bob's burgers are better than the

25:14

original bears beef. Yeah.

25:18

I think the original beef sandwich is probably

25:20

better than Bob's burgers. I think the sandwich

25:22

is probably better, but I'd rather sit in

25:24

the Bob's burgers and sit in the, in

25:26

the Mr. Beef and just hear them screaming

25:28

at each other. Yeah. You can also sit

25:30

in your car and get it to go. Yeah.

25:39

What neighborhood in Chicago is that? Does

25:41

that take place in? Uh, Grimm's

25:43

blow. Uh, you're a, you're a

25:45

local, uh, Illinois. I am

25:48

from Illinois. I'm from downstate. I've not actually

25:50

spent a whole heck of a lot of

25:52

time in Chicago. I do not

25:54

know. Okay. Uh, and what's your

25:56

favorite style of Chicago hot dog Chicago style.

26:00

Oh, dogs, I'm sorry to the people of

26:02

my state. What makes it a Chicago style

26:04

dog? They put a bunch of vegetables on

26:07

it. They put some celery salt. They put

26:09

a. Celery salt? A seeded bun. Yep,

26:11

seeded bun. Celery salt mustard.

26:14

Is it side or is it top? Wait

26:17

a minute, what? I think this is less key to

26:19

a Chicago dog but the cutting of the bun. I

26:21

don't know, but it's mostly the toppings as well. I

26:23

just don't like those hot dog buns that are cut

26:25

on the top so you can never quite fit the

26:28

hot dog all the way in it. Just

26:30

pry it apart a little more, man. It's not my

26:32

job to rip my noodle and fit more of it

26:35

in. And

26:37

they also feature like sliced cherry

26:39

tomatoes and a sport pepper. Sport,

26:42

what's a sport pepper? Kind of

26:44

like a pepper genie. Yeah, it's

26:46

too much for me. I'm, you

26:49

know, my adopted home of New York. I

26:51

prefer the New York style dog with some

26:54

mustard and then maybe some

26:56

sauerkraut or onions. Elliot, do

26:58

you have a hot dog preference? I

27:00

like ketchup and onions, maybe sauerkraut sometimes. I know

27:02

a lot of people are like, ketchup on a

27:04

hot dog? And I'm like, I don't care, you

27:07

don't have to eat it. Like that's how I

27:09

like to eat one. I like ketchup on a

27:11

hot dog too. Charlene, is that your hot dog

27:13

order? Nathan's ketchup and

27:15

then those crinkle fries. Oh yeah. I

27:18

feel like the crinkle fries. At this

27:20

point, the hot dog is more of an excuse to get

27:22

the crinkle fries. Yeah, and the little red fork. Yeah, you

27:24

gotta get a little red fork. Like you're a fucking Skek

27:26

team. We need that in our restaurant, the little red

27:28

fork. Little red fork, I'm into it, I'm into it. That's

27:31

such a German curry versus a- And I don't care what

27:33

the food is, but it should have a little plastic table,

27:35

just like inside a pizza box. Yeah.

27:37

Tiny little table for every time I'd get one

27:39

as a kid, I'm like, can I paint this

27:41

for my Warhammer guys to sit around and eat

27:43

pizza on? A Warhammer pizzeria?

27:46

Yeah, show me. No, that'd be great. Okay,

27:48

let's wait. I know we're brainstorming restaurant concepts

27:50

in the second half, but Warhammer pizzeria. Let's

27:52

just put a paint in that. Warhammer pizzeria,

27:54

yeah. Let's say that. What would the topic

27:57

be? Once again, we're

27:59

gonna save that for later. I'm

28:01

gonna forget the rest of this probably like goblin guts

28:03

or something. I don't know. So

28:06

the bar ten forward owned

28:09

by Guinan On

28:11

the Star Trek Enterprise. Yeah, I love

28:13

aliens in there Okay,

28:15

I like that if you go there Guinan's gonna give

28:17

you some sort of you know wise counsel.

28:20

Yeah Yeah, you gotta have a good yeah,

28:22

you gotta have a good front man Although I

28:24

feel like it's tough when what if you go

28:26

there on one of the nights that Guinan's not

28:28

working You're gonna be so disappointing right you came

28:31

all the way across space Going

28:34

to go there on a day that that's sort of Here

28:37

we go again time to roast Stewart.

28:39

I Like

28:41

the idea that this is coming up because in

28:44

this fantasy Elliott came

28:46

to hinterlands looking for See

28:50

my good friends In Stewart's

28:52

defense our bars open for 16

28:58

hours a day seven days a week.

29:00

You can't possibly be there all of those

29:02

hours Now

29:09

so I think I think we're all in

29:11

agreement the best Star Trek is Are

29:16

we all in agreement Star Wars

29:18

Dan's gonna say that Riker your ease

29:20

or person cuz I I made this

29:22

super clear I like I

29:25

like the Brave New World that has the

29:28

captain that everyone says has similar hair to

29:30

you Yeah, the one that everybody says

29:32

the Stewart put in space Ants

29:35

and Mount I think his name. Yeah. Well, I like

29:37

quark Like

29:39

quark, he's got some really interesting ideas

29:41

for a small business owner Can I

29:44

choose cue the omnipotent trickster who doesn't

29:46

really fit into the Star Trek universe

29:48

at all that I that I like

29:50

the I

29:57

mean you can obviously choose it. I would

29:59

say that that as Dan's shaking

30:01

his head, it means that you're incorrect.

30:04

Okay. What if I choose

30:06

Q the winged serpent? Is that a Star Trek thing?

30:08

Okay, sure. It is a Star Trek thing. Yeah,

30:11

it's because Michael Moriarty's in it and

30:13

he's in Star Trek. What about Q

30:15

from this last season of Drag Race? Okay.

30:19

I think you probably need to translate that for

30:21

Elliot and Dan. I just think you have a

30:23

Q from the James Bond movies. Yeah. Yeah,

30:27

Desmond Llewelyn in Drag.

30:29

Okay. Now, this

30:31

is a little outside the box, but I think we

30:33

might be able to get some ideas here. Central

30:36

Perk. Yes, Central Perk from the show Friends. Central

30:43

Perk, what do we like about it? Now,

30:45

what I like about the patron is you can order one

30:47

cup of coffee or zero cups of coffee and just hang

30:49

out all day. I don't like that as the

30:51

owner. Well, I don't know if you

30:53

can. Clearly, their favorite customers can and

30:55

they get that same table whenever they

30:57

want. But if I walked into Central

31:00

Perk, would I be

31:02

able to get a table or are these people just

31:04

hanging out there all night? Yeah, they

31:06

sit on that same couch all the time. It's gotta smell

31:08

like their asses. I mean, also they lay on their couch.

31:10

They all kind of smell like someone's ass. But they

31:12

lay on their couch like they're in that house. That's

31:14

a public couch. Yeah, that's kinda gross. They take

31:16

up a lot of space. I feel like they're taking

31:19

up way more space than a party of that size

31:21

really should be at that table. How about

31:23

a party of five? They knew

31:25

how to take up exactly the amount of space

31:27

that people need to take up. Just the 10

31:29

of us, they knew exactly how much space they

31:31

were gonna take up, a Christian amount. Charlene,

31:36

how do you feel about couches in

31:40

public spaces? I think

31:42

they're gross. Okay, interesting. You knew

31:44

that. What about like overstuffed ones

31:46

that have like lots of stuffing?

31:48

I mean, they're comfortable

31:51

in theory. They're kinda awesome.

31:54

You make this coffee shop feel like a

31:56

living room, but like a

31:58

bunch of people you don't know. spilling

32:00

stuff and sitting on this piece

32:02

of fabric and it's absorbing all

32:04

the absorbies and yeah. And so

32:07

I can't imagine that Monica

32:10

would put our face on this public couch. That's

32:12

true. Germa phobic. And,

32:14

uh, before we, before we move on to

32:17

the next half, before we put a pin

32:19

in this, who is the

32:21

best friends? Uh,

32:24

Lisa Kudrow Phoebe. Okay. Interesting. For

32:26

the best friends. Yeah. I mean,

32:28

I'd have to say, I'd also

32:30

have to say Lisa Kudrow. Like

32:32

there's really no, there's really no

32:34

competition. Whether we're talking about

32:36

the performers or the characters or

32:38

the, yeah, or the friend. Yeah. Uh, Charlene, do

32:40

you, do you want to weigh in? I'm partial

32:42

to, uh, Rachel. Char,

32:45

Char the Rachel. Cause of the haircut. Yeah.

32:48

Yeah. The Rachel. Yeah. I'm just partial to the

32:50

haircut. Uh,

32:52

okay. So we've all decided it's, uh, Rachel

32:55

and Phoebe. And now we're commended to who we will

32:58

be in the next flight. Wait, who's yours? Oh,

33:02

uh, I'm going to say Joey. Okay.

33:06

Joey's one of them. He's one

33:08

of them. He's one of the friends. Thumbs up

33:11

to that guy. Uh, okay.

33:13

Okay. Hang out with a chimp. Go

33:16

on. In

33:19

the Ed, right? Is it Ed? Yes,

33:22

it's Ed. That's the baseball playing champ.

33:24

Yeah. What? Ed. Yeah. And that's starred

33:27

Matt LeBlanc. Okay. It's

33:29

also a chimp and friends. Well,

33:32

it's not a chimp and friends. It's a chimp

33:34

and friends. It's a Saturday morning cartoon show. But

33:38

yeah, it's like a monkey. It's like a

33:40

capuchin monkey, right? Oh, yeah. I don't know

33:42

that much about monkey. Wow.

33:45

And I wrote the monkey out. Why did you come on this

33:47

podcast? I

33:50

told the guy you were going to be a

33:52

monkey expert. I saw an ad for a monkey expert

33:54

and I was like, Yeah, I know a lot about

33:56

the monkey. The

33:59

monkey. There's one named Davy Jones.

34:02

Also on the Brady Bunch. Yeah.

34:04

Yeah. Which is also the

34:06

name of a pirate. And

34:09

he was in A Pirate of the Caribbean

34:11

with a monkey. It all,

34:13

wow. Dan, I

34:16

think you proved the conspiracy. Mind blown. The

34:20

dots have been connected. We're

34:22

gonna take a brief break for a message from

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maximumfun.org or wherever you get podcasts.

35:12

Hey, howdy everybody. It's me,

35:14

producer Alex, AKA HowlDotty. I

35:17

have a brand new album that drops today,

35:19

June 15th, the day this mini is

35:21

coming out. And it will definitely

35:23

be up right now for a listen

35:25

and or a download on Bandcamp. And

35:27

it's probably up on Spotify and Apple

35:29

Music. It just sometimes it takes a

35:32

little bit longer to get through their system. So

35:34

I can't say for sure as I'm making this

35:36

promo, but it's probably up there. So

35:38

the new album is called I Need Some Help, and

35:40

it's got some great tracks on it. Like this, the

35:42

title track, I Need Some Help, which sounds like

35:44

this. I'm losing track of all

35:47

my thoughts, and it's too crowded in this world.

35:49

I'm on a sleeping ship about a mile from

35:51

shore. I think I need a new

35:53

park right by where that tree fell, and it's going

35:55

all to hell, man. I need some

35:57

help. And

36:04

there's a nice little bop on it called Look

36:06

Bad, Feel Bad. Got

36:21

a nice little groove to it, and I

36:23

got kind of a political anthem on there

36:25

called Netflix Should Be Free. There's

36:33

also a real fun one on there called

36:35

Squirrel House. I'm

36:38

going to be a

36:40

squirrel house. I'm going

36:42

to be a

36:44

squirrel house. All

36:51

that and more. Hal Dottie, I need

36:53

some help. Available now wherever you get

36:55

your music at. You

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39:24

city space. That's where we

39:26

will be in Boston July

39:29

26, 2024. What

39:31

we'll be talking about, a movie? A movie of

39:33

some kind? I don't think anyone will be surprised

39:35

to learn. We'll be talking about a movie. Still

39:38

thinking about it, though. But

39:41

we'll have great presentations ahead of time.

39:43

We'll take some questions. I

39:45

think I mentioned before, Stuart did a

39:48

presentation about cars in Boston that

39:50

really, I thought I was going to have a

39:53

heart attack and die. I was laughing so hard.

39:55

Will that happen again? Who knows? But

39:58

you gotta be there to see, so. That

40:00

is again on July 26th of

40:04

this year at 7 p.m. at WBUR

40:06

City Space. If you want tickets, they

40:09

are at blothousepodcast.com

40:12

slash events. And

40:15

we're back! Hooray! So

40:17

we have done a whirlwind tour through

40:20

bars and restaurants in movies and television

40:22

as a way for us to familiarize

40:24

ourselves with what bars and restaurants are.

40:27

Oh, thank God. So today what

40:29

we're going to be doing, this is our first meeting.

40:31

We were figuring out what bars and restaurants are. I

40:35

think we figured it out. Based

40:37

on knowledge. We're going to be doing the

40:39

real movie. Obviously that's how business meetings start.

40:43

So what we're first going to do, so

40:46

we have determined the name of our business, which

40:48

is of course the Flophouse Bar and Grill.

40:51

What about like the Flophouse Tavern? That's

40:54

too bad because it's already the Flophouse Bar and

40:56

Grill. You already know it. We had a meeting

40:59

with a few things already decided. So

41:01

the Flophouse Bar and Grill. Now

41:04

let's talk about vibe and

41:06

theme. What are we going

41:08

for here, guys? What matches the Flophouse brand?

41:13

What do you like in a restaurant? What I like

41:16

in a restaurant? What I like in a restaurant is a lot

41:18

of dark woods and brass all over the place. And

41:22

those newspapers on the wall. But I don't know

41:24

if that fits the Flophouse theme. I'm

41:26

an aging person whose hearing is

41:29

getting worse. What I like in

41:31

a restaurant often is sound baffling.

41:34

Oh, yeah. And a minimum of— Like half the

41:36

space on the walls to absorb the sound waves.

41:39

Loud music. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And rushes on the

41:41

floor to absorb sound. Yeah. Rushed.

41:44

I think the two kinds of restaurants I really like

41:46

are either ones with a lot of dark woods

41:48

and brass everywhere or ones that are kind

41:50

of like countertops, like real

41:52

diner metal chairs, things like that.

41:55

I don't know if there's a

41:57

way—I guess I just contain multitudes.

42:00

You know, but I don't know if either of those is

42:02

the right for the fluff house either a diner or a

42:04

steakhouse Essentially Charlene as our as our expert here Dark

42:07

woods and brass and stuff. Is that in

42:09

our budget? One or

42:11

the other Can

42:22

we do like like the red for

42:24

a cafe and have like like fun

42:27

how much money do we have? I

42:30

mean, I think we were just as beautiful in the

42:32

budget I grabbed a candle to buy the lid Because

42:34

I got excited about making a rainforest cafe Yeah, yeah

42:38

So did you guys ever go to the

42:40

rainforest cafe? I have been, yeah My mother

42:42

briefly owned stock in the rainforest cafe Really?

42:44

Wow She

42:46

invented the company Did

42:48

she, yeah, was she on the board of directors?

42:51

Did she? It's the richy, but she lost

42:53

it, we lost everything and that's why we lived under a

42:55

bridge for a certain amount of time Yeah, yeah, I've never

42:57

been to a rainforest It's like eating a

42:59

barrel What uh,

43:02

what's what's the whole deal there at a

43:04

rainforest festival? Uh, it's like eating a rainforest

43:07

It's a really animatronic Sounds like rain Yeah,

43:10

but what are you eating? It's like a mitzvah It's

43:12

like hamburgers and salad the same kind of stuff you get in any

43:14

sort of restaurant That's like it's not really about

43:16

the food. It's more about like looking at stuff

43:18

Oh, yeah, okay So it's like a hard rock

43:21

cafe Yeah, like a hard rock cafe Yeah, like a

43:23

hard rock cafe The rainforest instead of rock I'm really glad you

43:25

brought a hard rock cafe And in

43:27

one of those movies it was nature Yeah I'm

43:30

really glad we're talking about planning Hollywood

43:32

and hard rock cafe Because I really

43:34

feel like this is where the flophouse

43:36

bar and grill needs to go The

43:38

direction we need to go We need

43:40

memorabilia is what you're saying Memorabilia Cases

43:42

of like the underpants that

43:45

you guys wore to your last

43:47

live show I mean, yes Interlands

43:49

bar already has a flophouse memorabilia

43:51

on the wall That's kind

43:53

of true Interlands has kind of the

43:56

plan of Hollywood for the flophouse When

43:58

my parents came to town and

44:00

we stopped briefly at

44:02

Hinterlands. I basically just went

44:05

around and pointed to the wall when there

44:07

were podcast posters. I'm like, look,

44:09

that's my name, okay, let's go. And now you don't

44:11

have to bring them to your apartment. See how convenient

44:13

that is? Dan, was it weird for them to eat?

44:16

It was weird for them to have a drink in

44:18

a bar that was not patronized by a fictional British

44:20

detective. So

44:22

some backstory to this. In

44:24

England, in Oxford, I did a presentation

44:27

partly about what big Anglophiles my parents

44:30

are and how my mom, when

44:32

she was, they go to Oxford all the

44:34

time, not all the time, but they've been there

44:36

several times and they're like, you

44:39

should go to this pub. This is where

44:41

Inspector Morse drinks. So I'm like, okay, great,

44:43

a fictional detective. Did he see

44:45

his ass? I did not see a fictional

44:47

detective, Inspector Morse, or Inspector Lewis for that

44:50

matter. What are their assets? Yeah. Okay,

44:54

so I think we know we want

44:56

to do that kind of a thing.

44:59

That kind of a thing. I

45:02

swear I was clear about this with

45:05

you. You were, that thing, that thing,

45:07

that thing. Now, so

45:09

it's cases of memorabilia. It could be flophouse memorabilia,

45:11

it could be bad movie memorabilia. I

45:13

also wanna get. The theater recs costume, you know.

45:15

This is gonna be a little bit, well,

45:18

we haven't even done an episode on theater recs, so

45:20

that would be kind of wild, but that's fine. Then

45:22

the prom costume, I don't know. Thank

45:24

you, thank you. Well, we would get the

45:26

fucking bust of John Voight from Bratz. That's

45:29

the obvious piece of memorabilia. Do we have

45:31

like a, oh, I forgot what it's called.

45:33

You know, like what baseball team, a mascot?

45:35

Like a Grimace? Hello. We

45:38

have a Grimace guy. Yeah, I think Grimace

45:40

is considered the mascot of McDonald's. I didn't

45:42

even remember anything. The flop has a mascot,

45:44

it's called the flophouse house cat. So

45:47

of course there would be a guy dressed up

45:49

as the flophouse house cat, and he'd be riding

45:51

on the half pipe inside the restaurant. Or. He'd

45:54

go over, hug little kids, like

45:57

also give uncomfortably

45:59

long hugs. any young women that are there, and

46:01

we'll have to tell them to please stop doing that. Or

46:04

we could have a cat dressed like a man.

46:10

Okay, I'm actually into this too. Yeah,

46:12

well I feel like a real cat. Like a real

46:15

cat. But dressed like a man. I

46:18

feel like his pants with a hole for his

46:20

tail is the truth. Yeah. And

46:22

like a shirt. Yes. Okay, like a

46:24

one-up shirt. Like a one-up shirt. Yeah, maybe he's like,

46:26

I mean it depends on like, what our theme

46:29

night is. Like if we're having a Hawaiian night.

46:31

Oh, so he changes outfits. Yeah, Hawaiian outfits.

46:33

So that's our version of the Bob's Burger

46:35

specials is what outfit the cat is wearing.

46:37

Yeah. And they're looking at. Three

46:40

animatronics. A tie-in. Like one of each

46:42

of us, and we sing songs like

46:44

Scribblizz Pizza. Yeah, it's a fun little

46:46

show. I remember essentially recreating Chuck E.

46:48

Cheese. This is a convergent evolution. It's

46:50

just a flophouse version of Chuck E.

46:52

Cheese. Every restaurant eventually becomes Chuck E. Cheese.

46:55

Yeah, that's the thing. That's the way

46:57

of technology cyclical, right? Yep,

47:00

animatronic bands are gonna come back in a

47:02

big way. Ever since they put those animatronic

47:04

bands into 11 Madison Park, it just proves

47:06

that all restaurants have actually become Chuck E.

47:08

Cheese. Now, I heard that they were

47:10

doing away with the animatronic stuff from Chuck

47:12

E. Cheese because they're like, kids just wanna

47:14

look at screens. So does that mean we

47:16

can get those shits for cheap? Oh, people

47:19

do. And they like reprogram them. It's like

47:21

a whole like weird hobby. I

47:23

mean, I say weird. I mean, it's very

47:25

judgy, Dan. For God's sake, if I, you

47:27

know, having those, if I

47:30

was the sort of person who had all the

47:32

money and space out in

47:34

the garage, I would have a weird animatronic robot

47:36

thing. And Audrey's

47:38

like, you keep mentioning this friend that

47:40

I've never met, and Dan's like, uh.

47:44

And Ian's sure you're always hanging out. I can hear

47:46

the friend talking to you in the other room, but

47:48

when I open the door, there's no one, there's just

47:50

a curtain, I don't understand. You keep saying something about,

47:52

you won't follow its directions to kill, but they can

47:55

be nervous. Dan, I'm gonna set aside the fact that

47:57

when you said, if I had all the money and space

47:59

out. I thought you said all the money in space and I

48:01

wanted to be like Dan. I hate to break to you There's

48:03

no money in space Minerals

48:06

out there that are worth something Resources

48:10

but it's not like you can you get to

48:12

work mine those bring them back. Yeah like points

48:15

Yes, never crack. I'm open to find change inside

48:18

a lot of astronauts pockets while there's

48:24

When they go on the moon involves that their

48:26

pocket full

48:28

of heavy gravity I'm

48:33

willing to bet that nobody is carrying

48:35

small changes face, but I Fuckin

48:40

spaceport Yeah,

48:43

give you change back and you're like what the fuck am

48:45

I gonna do with it? I

48:49

don't know if it's all literally all the money

48:51

in space probably yeah branch up a couple

48:53

of bucks Okay,

48:55

but animatronics let's get back that So

48:58

goodbye to the animatronics, but you're at the spaceport and

49:00

they give you your change There

49:04

is a little cup and it's like donate for the troops

49:06

and you're like yeah Yeah, but are they really gonna give

49:08

this money to the troops or they like well and also

49:10

like I don't I guess I

49:12

approve Of the starship troopers fight against the

49:14

bugs, but I don't appreciate your tactics that

49:16

they're using, you know They're like a little

49:19

too Nazi like Troopers

49:21

without supporting the war you know Where

49:24

your taxes go that's the thing I'm

49:26

gonna go to the boat and

49:28

how how mad do you think Guinan would

49:30

be if to get rid of some of

49:32

that change someone? Tipped and change instead of tipping

49:35

with bills would would she be mad about that

49:37

sure what's your experience of getting tipped and change?

49:40

I do not care for it Okay,

49:42

have you ever been chipped and tipped and

49:44

changed before I mean I If

49:48

I'm tipped like five dollars and quarters,

49:50

that's fine. But if you're giving me

49:52

like the quarter, uh-huh Then

49:54

here's a question start on it. Yeah, if

49:56

someone's tipping you would

49:58

you rather have five dollars? I

50:01

mean, sure, I'd rather have $5.25. No,

50:05

I'm just curious. I'm curious. There's

50:08

a point at which it's like, I just don't want the coin. Yeah.

50:13

Would you rather be tipped by one duck

50:15

the size of a horse or by a

50:17

hundred horses the size of ducks? That's actually

50:19

a good question. Oh, man, that is

50:21

a really good question. I

50:24

feel like, wait, a hundred ducks

50:26

that look like a horse? You

50:29

know, like, never mind. Let me know. Sure.

50:32

I'm going to go with it. Change for a big buck. I'm

50:34

a hundred, right? Because it's like a hundred. Duck wearing a horse

50:36

costume? People, so like... That's like a dollar

50:39

a duck. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, but they're just carrying

50:41

one drink because they're so small. True.

50:44

And a hundred straws? Yeah. What

50:46

about the turtles? I'm just

50:48

assuming that the more patrons, the

50:50

more tipped because no matter how big that duck

50:52

is, like, they're not necessarily going to tip the

50:54

more on the drink. Oh, no, that's true. He

50:56

doesn't tip a hundred bucks. He doesn't tip at

50:58

all. Yeah. Yeah. The

51:01

what? Scrooge McDuck. He doesn't tip at

51:03

all. He reached into

51:05

the tip jar while you weren't looking and

51:07

pulled money. Yeah. Yeah. And

51:10

he would be like, like, everything's so expensive here. Why

51:12

are they charging so much? I can make this

51:14

at home for much less money. Yeah. He'd

51:17

tip you the moth that comes out of this coin purse.

51:20

Tell Tigger, don't let in Scrooge McDuck. Yeah, I'll

51:22

write that down. That's good advice. That's

51:25

good advice. Yeah. It's like you have

51:27

to picture up. It says, do not let this duck in.

51:29

Yeah, do not serve. You should have that. You should have

51:31

that either hinterland or at a... Do not serve with a

51:33

stinger duck. A fine bar, yeah. So now that we have

51:35

a kind of understanding as to what our vibe

51:37

is going to be like. Sure.

51:48

Yeah, definitely. Let's talk cuisine.

51:50

Okay. Okay. I

51:53

know we're mainly a bar first. But as

51:55

I mentioned, it's bar and grill. And you

51:57

know what? Every place needs a little bit

51:59

of... I'm gonna eat nibbles these days. I'm

52:01

gonna go out on a limb and I'm

52:03

gonna say French fries So

52:09

what kind of food do you like to

52:11

eat in our restaurant Charlene what plane Okay,

52:18

so you eat the same way that my

52:20

five-year-old eats Uh-huh sure

52:24

With french fries all the french fries great except if we're

52:27

gonna have french cooking we're gonna eat a French show Hair

52:30

and that's I don't want a guy was rat in his

52:33

hair in it in the French toast Yeah,

52:35

yeah. All right, so we

52:38

it all came around. All right. What's the

52:40

highest profit margin on like? And

52:43

yeah popcorn just sold some saltines

52:45

or something saltine Oh

52:49

like like what's the what's

52:51

the bar? Yes,

52:53

where they yeah, they serve like

52:55

a sleeve of saltine all things

52:57

for the sliced onions and some

53:00

Beer cheese. Yeah, did I have beer

53:02

cheese? Yeah. Yeah, it's like

53:04

it's like horseradish beer and

53:06

cheese blended enough slogan

53:08

is yeah, you're gonna smell when you

53:11

leave Hey,

53:13

it's been working. They've been open for yeah, I mean I

53:15

use this a thing. No way actually They don't do that

53:18

They do slices of cheese of cheddar

53:20

cheese and then they do just their

53:22

mustard right there super spicy mustard Yeah,

53:25

I mean serving slices of mild cheddar cheese

53:27

and and really upcharging that that will make

53:29

a lot of money off of it Yeah,

53:32

what about the bathroom? Okay

53:41

Feel like we might have a bad so we're gonna

53:43

need a bathroom attendant, right? Oh, yeah

53:47

And a wiper that could be Feel

53:50

like rabbit job. Yeah, you are seems like

53:52

you would put up a few or I'm

53:54

attended. Yeah Yeah, you gotta go. You gotta

53:56

ice up those urinals, right? Sure,

54:00

why do they ice up your I have no idea.

54:02

I think it's cuz it looks cool I

54:05

mean it is I can't see if it

54:07

helps it smell there is something very satisfying

54:09

about Shooting a hot stream of

54:11

urine at ice and watching it melt. It

54:13

is satisfying It feels like you have some

54:15

control over I feel like me have a

54:17

reality. Yeah, maybe you're leaving the basic Power

54:22

I have I

54:27

Have a theory. I think it's

54:29

to give you guys something to aim at so that

54:32

you're not all over the floor They definitely do that

54:34

they put those like fly decals into your room So

54:36

you name it not only like that cuz I don't

54:38

want to be peeing on a fly that seems cruel,

54:40

you know But it's not a

54:42

real fly. No, but still they're like

54:44

catch a fly and stick it on It's like when

54:46

you go to a shooting shooting range and they're like

54:48

do you want like a blank? Target

54:51

to shoot at or this giant fly creature

54:53

and you're like give me the blank one

54:55

I don't want to shoot this fly or

54:57

that innocent fly creature this Jeff Goldblum fly

54:59

creature. Yeah, that would be a pretty niche

55:03

Like shooting shooting gallery target. Yeah

55:07

That's true. Not a lot of people are going in asking for the

55:09

man fly Although I

55:11

feel like that's a pretty appropriate like no you

55:13

don't have to feel bad for doing it, right? Cuz

55:15

he's he's a monster at this. Well, I mean I

55:17

I wouldn't say it's more than he wants to put

55:19

out of his misery at that point Yeah, that's true.

55:21

That's true. He's out there and you're helping As

55:24

opposed to the as opposed to the hoodlum Targets

55:27

which I don't like so much. Yeah

55:29

those or yeah or former presidents or

55:34

Yeah, we're the one where it's like it's like Lady

55:36

Liberty holding a baby. I don't want to shoot at

55:38

that Yeah,

55:41

that feels weird Very

55:44

weird that anyone at a shooting range would pick

55:46

that one Yeah, that one

55:48

where that one where Barney Rubble is

55:50

holding a box cutter to Wilma's neck

56:00

than if it was porn depicting Barney

56:02

Raul. And. Okay,

56:06

so let's get back to food,

56:08

everybody. So we're talking, are we gonna be

56:10

one of those places that gives you a free pizza every time

56:12

you order a beer? Every time? Every,

56:14

every, how big is this? My main pizza?

56:16

Pizza's a loss leader at this point. Heavy

56:20

loss leader. No. So if

56:22

it's the flophouse restaurant, obviously we should throw

56:24

in some of our favorites. So like Dan's

56:26

boy bait would be in the dessert. Elliot's

56:30

fried chicken. What would we call

56:32

Elliot's fried chicken? Would it be

56:34

like Elliot's finger lickin' fried chicken?

56:38

I think you got it, yeah. Oh,

56:42

I know it's good, I just did it right out. Do

56:44

we offer a prize for whoever can get their

56:46

bones the cleanest? Yeah. Yeah, when

56:48

do they get a free meal? Do

56:52

they clean that shit? Yeah, yeah,

56:54

you call it like Elliot's bone

56:56

crunchin' gristle-suckin' fried chicken. And

56:59

of course we'll sell Stewart's

57:01

plastic tubs of nuts and

57:04

fruits. I

57:07

mean, you need to have fuckin' appies, right?

57:09

You want some appies. Why do we call

57:11

it a doo-doo? A great app when you're

57:13

drinking just a tub of nuts and chocolates,

57:15

yeah. You want to move the outside of

57:17

it? We're off to a roasted almonds. Drink

57:19

it out of this takeout container.

57:21

Yeah, well yeah, drinking everything, the

57:24

bear style out of a giant plastic cork

57:26

container. Dan, I think maybe, are you bringing

57:28

fresh baked bread to the

57:31

restaurant bar? I guess I gotta. Yeah. I

57:34

guess I'm committed now. Yeah, I mean, I

57:36

feel like baked goods is a key component.

57:38

Yeah, what kind of baked goods are you serving?

57:40

Kind of like, what, Parker Rolls or something? Oh,

57:43

those are good. Parker Rolls, Peter Parker Rolls,

57:45

Parker Brothers Rolls. Peter Parker Rolls, they've all

57:47

responsibility. Yeah, have you made

57:49

Parker Brothers Rolls before? They've

57:52

got a little spinner on the top so you can tell how many of

57:54

them you're gonna eat, yeah. I'll sell

57:56

my famous zucchini bread, as eaten

57:58

by Jon Stewart. Yeah,

58:00

wow It's not

58:03

this piece other

58:06

past zucchini bread This

58:09

zucchini breads great grandfather was eaten by

58:11

John Stewart. Yeah, what food

58:13

am I known for eating? Yeah,

58:15

what food are you know? I don't think I'm known for eating

58:18

a food outside of bread.

58:20

Oh, yeah, Brad With

58:23

a little bit of butter It

58:26

has a song already Not

58:29

a lot of people are known for eating specific

58:31

foods. I've fried chicken the nintz trolls have pizza

58:35

Oh, they're known for eating pizza, but

58:37

they're turtles turtles don't eat pizza.

58:39

Yeah, they must be mistaken. They eat like lettuce

58:45

Reading lettuce also ninjas are not

58:47

known for eating Italian food, right?

58:50

They're not known for being turtles or

58:53

the open something Or

58:55

teens for that matter I mean some ninjas probably

58:57

were teens but by and large you'd have to

59:00

be the most yeah being a ninja to be

59:02

that good As a teen yeah, and I'm more

59:04

of a Sally area being yeah, you work hard,

59:06

but you can't get it done Yeah, but I'm

59:08

a fucking a plus hater So

59:13

now that we've decided on the menu that we

59:15

finalized our menu no questions asked the

59:17

bear get the fuck out of here First

59:20

do one final pass on our

59:22

cocktail menu and now normally when

59:25

you might think let's let's be

59:27

like super Mixologists and sit down

59:29

and carefully measure everything and come

59:31

up with some originals. That's bullshit.

59:33

Let's do riffs on classics Okay,

59:35

we're gonna be some classic cocktails

59:37

and just rename them Dan

59:42

had even better that I was gonna suggest the dr.

59:44

Manhattan, which is this bent a Manhattan that Dan dips

59:46

his penis into After

59:51

Like yeah,

59:54

if we're to put a daiquiri on the

59:56

menu, what would we call our the flophouse

59:58

official daiquiri? Mm, the

1:00:01

snackery and it's got chips in it. Okay.

1:00:03

That's not bad. Uh,

1:00:07

the Dak shepergery and it's Mariel

1:00:11

Hemingway ever in one of our bad movies. It

1:00:13

could be the Mariel Hemingway, Jackery, but I don't

1:00:15

think, I don't think we covered any of her

1:00:17

work. Okay. Let's put a pin in Zachary. What

1:00:19

about a bloody Mary? What

1:00:22

will the flophouse bloody Mary be and what

1:00:24

additional garnish will we throw on top of

1:00:26

it? An entire

1:00:28

roast pheasant. Probably

1:00:30

an entire roast pheasant. Yeah, that sounds good.

1:00:33

I would like to say just a crossroad. I call

1:00:36

it the bloody Harry at the time with my character

1:00:38

maniac Harry from the maniac of the, Oh yeah, there

1:00:40

you go. You wrote a

1:00:42

comic book. I did. Although

1:00:44

if it's called bloody Harry, people will think

1:00:47

it's about, it's that it's Debbie Harry as

1:00:49

a serial killer, which would be cool, but

1:00:51

it's not flophouse related. Yeah. And also like

1:00:53

you might get worried that people think there's

1:00:55

hair in the cocktail. Yeah. Bloody Harry wouldn't

1:00:57

sound very good. So maybe it's like a

1:00:59

long, maybe it's like a long garlic bread

1:01:01

just stuffed into it. That's the, that's the

1:01:03

garnish. I was

1:01:06

thinking, um, there

1:01:08

will be bloody Mary. Oh,

1:01:10

I know a movie you guys. What about

1:01:12

the bloody manky? Oh

1:01:15

yeah. Yeah.

1:01:18

It's gonna be in the bloody

1:01:20

manky. That's a good question. Something

1:01:23

that is pretending to be much younger than it

1:01:25

actually is. Like a

1:01:27

pickle. That's

1:01:30

pretty good. Okay.

1:01:33

Uh, we got a couple more and we're going

1:01:35

to wrap this up since this is, this menu

1:01:37

is coming together. We have a Dan Hatton. We

1:01:39

have a bloody manky. Uh,

1:01:41

what about a grasshopper? Shark,

1:01:44

can you describe a grasshopper to Elliott? Who's never

1:01:46

drank one before? No. A

1:01:48

grasshopper is made with a

1:01:50

white cream, a cacao and

1:01:53

green cream to mint. So

1:01:55

that's where the grasshopper part comes in. Yeah. That's,

1:01:58

those are the flames. And

1:02:00

creamy flavor profile. Yeah, sweet

1:02:02

and creamy like a grasshopper.

1:02:04

Yeah, exactly. I

1:02:07

only know about grasshoppers from the joke about them. So it

1:02:09

is good to know what's actually in it. What's the joke?

1:02:11

That a grasshopper walks into a bar and the bartender says

1:02:14

we got a drink here named after you and the grasshopper

1:02:16

goes Really, you got a drink named Murray? Oh, yeah

1:02:19

An old joke. Yeah So

1:02:21

maybe what you call Murray. And that's a permacore's

1:02:24

one in an epic movie too. Okay So,

1:02:27

okay. Alright, so so we're talking about a minty

1:02:29

creamy cocktail House

1:02:39

hopper Okay,

1:02:42

grass house Like

1:02:44

a coal house like a Kermit

1:02:46

the Frog or something Kermit

1:02:49

the Frog he's green and minty

1:02:52

I presume

1:02:55

you know if he brushes you'll have to

1:02:57

add some piggy to find out. Yeah And

1:03:01

if he has teeth it would be very alarming because he is

1:03:03

a frog. That's yeah, they don't have

1:03:05

them usually. I felt frog. Grasshoppers have teeth? No,

1:03:08

they do like mandibles or such.

1:03:10

So we've decided It's

1:03:13

called what Kermit the Frog Kermit

1:03:16

the Frog or something. Yeah And

1:03:18

our final cocktail you gotta have a hot cocktail you

1:03:20

need a hot drink these days let's do a play

1:03:23

on an Irish coffee Okay

1:03:30

Well, yep, and in this case I'm

1:03:33

gonna suggest we tip our hat to

1:03:35

a little movie starring Jamie Dornan and

1:03:37

we throw a little bit of We throw

1:03:39

a little bit of honey in there. Okay the

1:03:42

bee and some time Wild

1:03:48

mountain time yeah, man. We nailed it. Okay,

1:03:50

so I feel like this is a pretty

1:03:52

good meeting I've

1:03:55

already taken money out of your accounts And

1:04:00

to pay for our bar

1:04:02

expert. Speaking of bar expert,

1:04:05

Charlene, do you have anything you would like

1:04:07

to promote? Depending

1:04:09

on when this comes out, we have

1:04:11

our pride party. It's actually,

1:04:14

yeah, it will already have

1:04:16

our pride party and it

1:04:18

was awesome. Yeah, that's what

1:04:20

I like to hear. But

1:04:23

you know, come to Minis, come to Hinterlands. Stewart

1:04:26

won't be there. Maybe.

1:04:29

Probably not. So this

1:04:31

has been a flophouse mini. You heard

1:04:33

some ideas. You cannot steal them. They're all

1:04:36

legally our ideas. We'll be back

1:04:38

next week talking about a movie of some type. Kind

1:04:40

of like what we did today,

1:04:43

but more focusing on the movie

1:04:45

and talking about restaurant ideas and

1:04:47

mall activities. Slightly less completely chaotic.

1:04:49

Okay. I take that

1:04:52

as a compliment, Dan.

1:04:54

So for the flophouse, this is for the

1:04:57

flophouse, a podcast on the maximum fun podcast

1:04:59

network where you can hear plenty of other

1:05:01

good podcasts. And this specific podcast has been

1:05:04

produced by Alexander Smith, who does a great

1:05:06

job. You can find him as how old

1:05:08

Dottie on various social media. And I believe

1:05:10

he has a new album out. But for

1:05:13

the flophouse, I've been Stuart Wellington. I've been

1:05:15

Dan McCoy. I've been Elliott Kalin.

1:05:18

I've been Charlene Wellington.

1:05:20

Okay. Bye. Bye.

1:05:28

Maximum fun. A work-around network

1:05:31

of artists owned shows. Supported

1:05:33

directly by you.