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Jeep is a registered trademark. This

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week on The God Pod. So

0:33

the people behinds, he gets us,

0:35

can fork off. They

0:38

don't get me. Sure, they

0:40

get that I'm in defeat, but

0:42

don't you dare associate

0:44

yourselves with me. I don't know you, I

0:46

don't work with you, I don't approve of

0:48

your messages. I

0:52

asked people recently if they wanted to be my

0:54

Valentine and a lot of people

0:57

online said yes, so I've got like the thousands

0:59

of Valentines. Oh, that's so

1:01

sweet. I know right? Isn't that

1:03

great? I've got 12. I

1:08

never knew that you've had plastic surgery Jesus,

1:10

you've gone under the knife. A

1:13

little God Pod scoop for everybody. Wow. Something

1:16

I didn't know. Yep. Jesus you're

1:18

full of surprises. This

1:33

is the God Pod. My name is

1:35

God and I'm here today with my

1:37

son and friend, Jesus

1:39

Christ. Hello humans. Hello

1:42

father. I'm

1:44

still a little, little hungover from

1:47

the Super Bowl. Yeah. What did

1:49

you, you drank a lot of

1:51

wine? I did have a lot

1:53

of wine. Of course, my girl's

1:55

boyfriend was in the Super Bowl,

1:57

so it was very exciting for me. The

2:00

Chiefs won as well, coached

2:02

by the Lorax himself. Exactly.

2:06

I became a huge Chiefs and

2:08

Taylor Swift fan here towards the

2:10

end of the season because of

2:13

you. You're

2:15

kind of like my daughter, so I'm a gay dad. And

2:22

you are just swooning for Taylor

2:26

and for them. Some

2:28

people would say that I'm obsessed, people

2:31

that are broflakes mad in

2:33

the comments. Because yeah,

2:35

I read the comments. I

2:37

read all the comments by everybody. And

2:40

yeah, they would say I'm not obsessed.

2:43

I'm just following along with what's going

2:45

on in popular culture and just

2:48

laughing, laughing as

2:51

the toilet bowl swirls, what people

2:54

care about and what the algorithm will

2:57

allow. But it's just something that everybody

2:59

knows about. Yeah, and I think for

3:01

a lot of people, the story of,

3:03

let's say, Taylor and Travis, it's a

3:05

welcome distraction from their everyday lives. It's

3:07

a love story, if I

3:10

may quote Taylor herself. Does

3:12

she have a song called Love Story? And

3:15

they were dancing towards it. I saw some

3:17

video. That is true. It's a

3:19

love story, baby. Just say yes. Jesus, were

3:21

you at the after party? Of

3:23

course I was. You were hanging out with them last night, right?

3:25

Yeah. I got that kind of

3:27

access. I was turning water into wine. I

3:29

was clubbing. I was getting low on the

3:31

dance floor. Yeah, you were

3:34

getting low. Get low, get

3:36

low. Were you dancing like this? Whoa.

3:39

Wow, you really? No. Move

3:41

around. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You're

3:43

so flexible. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. I'm dancing

3:45

with my table. Duh, duh, duh, duh.

3:48

I always feel bad for the football players because

3:50

they have to party late into the night or

3:52

they get to party late into the night and

3:54

then they have to go to Disneyland the next

3:56

day. It's like I would just want to

3:58

chill in bed all the following day and nurse my hangover.

4:00

You don't have to go to Disneyland

4:02

the very next day, Jesus. They do.

4:04

They do. That's the thing. That's the

4:06

move. They go to Disneyland the next

4:08

day. But anyway, also just wanted to

4:11

mention there was a little embarrassing moment

4:13

when Taylor was looking mortified

4:16

after Travis was singing

4:18

Viva Las Vegas after

4:21

winning the Super Bowl. Viva!

4:24

It was just cringe. It was cringe. He should

4:26

have said it once, you know, Viva Las Vegas!

4:28

I know I'm left with that, but he was

4:30

like singing it. He just kept going

4:32

and going and going. Right. And yeah,

4:34

even I was embarrassed. I was like,

4:37

you know what Jesus? You know what?

4:39

You know what? Yeah. I

4:41

got the ick. You got the ick. I

4:43

think his woman got the ick

4:47

as well. She was like, oh boy, there he goes

4:49

again. It's going to be a long night. We

4:54

saw the first faltering of the

4:57

relationship in real time. No, it

4:59

was fine. Yeah. He was being

5:02

silly because, you know, when you,

5:04

you're just so high off the

5:06

endorphins, Jesus. Yeah. Well,

5:08

a lot of people were saying that, uh, Taylor.

5:10

What a game. What did it, first of all,

5:12

what a game. It wasn't going

5:15

down for a second. Yeah, bro. All

5:17

right. Let me give you my football

5:19

review. Wow. Uh,

5:21

match of the century, everybody. Overtime

5:24

in the Super Bowl. What?

5:27

And then, and

5:30

then, and then the, the chiefs were

5:32

behind like the whole game. It was 10 to

5:34

three at half. And

5:36

then I don't know. I don't know. Usher came

5:39

out and then like, and then, and then, and

5:41

then the coach for the chiefs heard the song

5:43

and he was like, yeah,

5:46

okay. Andy Reid. His name is Andy

5:48

Reid. He must've done a line of,

5:50

he maybe did a rail or something

5:53

because he came out on fire in

5:55

the second half. Yeah. They're a second

5:57

half team. So my disciple said at

5:59

my. Super Bowl party that I attended

6:03

Yeah, well and honestly the first half of

6:05

the game was kind of boring. There wasn't

6:07

really much happen. It was so boring Yeah,

6:09

right, but then but then

6:11

but then just to play devil's advocate

6:13

here for a second Jesus to the

6:15

people who think that This was all

6:17

scripted You

6:20

if you were you know an

6:22

ad executive you couldn't have scripted

6:24

this better they got an extra

6:26

entire quarter of Ads

6:29

yes. Yeah. Oh my god.

6:31

I'm thrilling during a thrilling

6:33

game. Yeah, right, right so

6:37

And then and then the fairy

6:39

tale happened and Taylor Stormed

6:43

the field then she

6:45

jumped into his arms and

6:47

he proposed to her, right? That's

6:49

what everybody thought was going to happen and then

6:51

they and then they just did it right there

6:53

in front of 80 million people They

6:57

did kiss a bunch we did we eat

6:59

right The

7:02

fairy tale happened Jesus I intervened

7:04

I sent some angels down

7:06

to the field and

7:10

They helped with the home runs and the

7:12

grand dunks speaking of intervening Did

7:15

you see what Joe Biden posted after

7:17

the Super Bowl? Oh my goodness? Believe

7:20

this Okay,

7:22

well, you know social media team

7:25

right right there on I doubt that he

7:27

did it It was

7:29

dark Brandon with laser eyes and

7:32

it said just like we drew it up

7:34

at Chiefs They

7:37

just leaned into that excellent excellent

7:39

why not it is excellent. Honestly.

7:41

I've seen a lot worse I

7:45

mean yeah from People

7:47

that will go unnamed but certain someone's

7:50

are very very bad and very cringe

7:52

at social media And

7:54

other people that was funny. You got

7:56

it. Yeah, I just you could

7:58

tell a lot of people heads probably exploded

8:00

off of that one. Right.

8:03

And it also was posted sometime

8:05

last night, Sunday night, yeah,

8:08

Sunday night. And everybody

8:10

who was watching the Super Bowl already had a

8:12

few drinks in them. So they're seeing this, after

8:15

the Super Bowl, a little drunk. Can you

8:18

imagine, can you imagine being there like posted

8:21

just now? Wow.

8:25

It was, it was a wild time online

8:28

last night. Conspiracy theories do tickle

8:30

me. There were these other theories

8:32

about Taylor Swift being a Pentagon

8:34

asset. Yeah. Um, saying that she'd

8:36

rigged the Super Bowl. I

8:39

find it all amusing. Oh, I got

8:41

to say, good job, Deep State. You did

8:43

it again. Wow. I mean, they really, they

8:45

really, yeah. Another excellently

8:47

deployed operation. Their execution is

8:50

flawless every time. I guess.

8:52

Oh, and according to the

8:54

conspiracy theorists, yeah. This means

8:57

that, uh, that

8:59

dark Brandon's going to win the election now.

9:02

Okay. Great. I

9:05

guess that backfired. Oh,

9:07

you know, it'd be an epic. Let's say

9:09

that, um, Biden wins in November

9:11

and then Taylor posts on

9:14

Instagram with laser eyes, just like

9:16

we drew it up Biden. That

9:18

would be amazing. I

9:20

would die. Yeah. The

9:23

hysteria has been through the roof

9:26

and, uh, yeah, we watched it all

9:28

happen. I was laying on

9:30

my bean bag chair in heaven, just

9:33

sort of eating a lot

9:35

of wings and things about you, Jesus. You

9:37

had a lot of wine. Yeah. I had,

9:39

uh, the disciples, I actually went to a

9:42

party that one of the disciples was throwing,

9:44

we had some wings, we had some wine,

9:46

we had some

9:48

cookies, some nachos. Yeah.

9:51

It was good time. Good time. Yeah.

9:54

And you enjoyed the halftime show. I

9:56

did enjoy the halftime show, especially when

9:58

Usher took his shirt off. I

10:01

was wearing, he was wearing Mithril

10:03

from Lord of the Rings. He

10:06

must have borrowed that from Frodo. Oh

10:09

yeah. Did you see that he

10:11

was wearing Mithril? You know what, I didn't notice that.

10:13

Maybe I had too much wine in me by that

10:15

point. Good catch though. Good

10:17

catch. I was enjoying

10:20

it until we started

10:22

seeing these He Gets Us ads

10:25

again at the Super Bowl. And

10:28

there was that first one, what was it,

10:30

a minute long? And it was

10:33

a bunch of people washing the feet

10:35

of others in need. Yeah, and they

10:38

were using AI. Listen, listen. That

10:40

was AI? This is

10:42

going to have to go down as one

10:44

of the worst as of

10:47

all time. Seriously. Seriously

10:50

bro. The Lord has spoken. Go off. Really

10:53

though? You go off? No, it was

10:56

ridiculous. I was trying, these commercials come

10:58

on and my disciples who I had

11:00

considered intelligent people are saying, Oh, this

11:02

is such a nice way to rebrand

11:04

you Jesus. This is good. This is

11:07

great. I was like, guys, don't you

11:09

listen to the God Pod that dad

11:11

and I record? If you did, you

11:13

would know that the

11:15

company behind He Gets Us

11:18

is actually a horrible group of

11:20

people. And you found this report from

11:23

Boing Boing. First of all,

11:25

this ad costs $7 million. So that's just for a

11:27

30 second ad. I think they had two of them.

11:29

So it was, I heard it was 17.5 million is

11:31

what I read. The

11:34

He Gets Us campaign is funded

11:37

by the Servant Foundation. And

11:41

these guys have been a major

11:43

funder of the Alliance Defending Freedom.

11:45

And that is a conservative Christian

11:48

litigation shop that is led fights

11:50

to ban abortion and allow businesses

11:52

to discriminate against LGBTQ customers. And

11:55

this spring, ADF lawyers will be at

11:57

the Supreme Court pushing to limit access

11:59

to the abortion. pill. So the people

12:01

behind, he gets us, can

12:04

F off. They

12:08

don't get me. Sure, they get that

12:11

I am in defeat, but don't

12:13

you dare associate yourselves

12:15

with me. I don't know you, I don't

12:17

work with you. I don't approve

12:20

of your messages. Wow.

12:22

Thank you. Wow. Jesus. All I

12:24

can say is

12:28

you get us because I

12:30

mean, I don't know about their version, but let

12:33

me tell you this ad was, it's just so

12:35

many different ways to hate it. They used AI.

12:37

Okay. Here's what I'm saying.

12:39

Everybody on all sides hated this.

12:41

The left, the right, the

12:45

people that hate AI online,

12:47

just posters. Everybody.

12:50

Let me read you somebody's.

12:53

Okay. Okay. Superbowl foot

12:57

washing Christianity ad faces attacks

12:59

from the left slamming hobby

13:02

lobby link Fox business

13:06

Christian Superbowl commercial

13:08

outrageous conservatives. And

13:13

what was their problem? On

13:16

this week, a Christian commercial about

13:19

Jesus that aired during the Superbowl

13:21

and Sunday angered some conservatives who

13:24

felt like the advertisements justified certain

13:26

sins. The commercial funded

13:28

by the organization, he gets us showed

13:30

images of several people, including

13:32

a woman outside of family planning clinic

13:35

and a person attending a protest,

13:37

having their feet washed a

13:39

reference to the story of Jesus washing

13:42

his disciples feet. The commercial

13:44

ends with the phrase Jesus didn't teach

13:46

hate. He washed feet. Like, you know

13:48

what, Jesus, I, I do

13:51

like that message and

13:53

imagery being used, but

13:55

the problem is, you know, we know the

13:59

people funding it. are not

14:01

to be trusted. Exactly,

14:03

exactly. And so this is giving

14:06

them a better image when it

14:08

shouldn't. Why are they doing so

14:11

in any case, the right

14:13

wing, the

14:15

images are meant to symbolize how we should

14:17

treat one another. While the commercial is meant

14:20

to call themes of love and unity and

14:22

love your neighbor ahead of a deeply divided

14:24

election according to the organization in a press

14:26

release, which says its goal is to remind

14:28

everyone, including ourselves, that Jesus' teachings are a

14:31

warm embrace, not a cold shoulder. Jesus, why

14:33

don't you like that? Dad,

14:36

really? Well, still

14:38

the commercial was met with

14:41

an icy reception from many

14:43

conservatives and religious leaders on

14:45

social media. The he gets us

14:47

feet out about Jesus and seems to imply

14:49

that Jesus was cool with all kinds of

14:52

sinful behavior. He wasn't. Jesus, care to comment?

14:56

Look, everybody's allowed to get a little naughty from time

14:58

to time. Quote,

15:01

he didn't go hang out with prostitutes or

15:03

any other sinner because he accepted the choices

15:05

they made. He did it to inspire them

15:07

to change. Robbie Starbuck, a

15:09

music video director and former congressional

15:12

candidate, posted to X, the

15:14

social media platform formerly known as

15:16

Twitter. Oh, thank you for

15:18

clarifying. I'd forgotten. All these

15:20

articles have to say. I know. I

15:22

don't get it. Robbie's thank you, Robbie

15:25

Starbuck. I like this headline from Buzzfeed,

15:27

Jesus confirmed foot freak. There was a

15:29

Jesus foot washing ad during the

15:34

Super Bowl. Yeah, so Twitter, they

15:37

were just going after like, so

15:39

Jesus is a foot guy? Jesus, once

15:43

and for all, we're gonna need you to weigh in. Are

15:45

you a foot guy? I

15:48

do like feet, okay? And

15:50

there's nothing wrong with that. You can enjoy feet

15:52

in the bedroom. You can enjoy feet when you're

15:55

washing them for others. Yeah,

15:57

I like feet, okay? Sorry.

16:00

I would also like to

16:02

read a comment here that I see

16:04

in this BuzzFeed article if your church

16:06

can afford a foot washing Commercial for

16:08

the Super Bowl it should pay taxes

16:10

like a lot of taxes. Yes Yeah,

16:13

they blew like 15 million dollars on this

16:15

one 60 second commercial. They

16:17

could instead have used that money To

16:20

donate to those in need good point

16:23

Jesus Yeah, like how about

16:25

feeding the hungry? Yeah, that's

16:27

who maybe housing the homeless. Mm-hmm.

16:31

Maybe a third

16:33

funny thing buying

16:35

tickets to Taylor's tour No,

16:39

no, she doesn't need the help Jesus.

16:41

Okay. Okay. Yeah, what's she gonna do

16:43

now that she doesn't have all this

16:45

publicity from the NFL I Think

16:49

she'll be fine. I don't think she

16:51

ever depended on that I

16:54

Was gonna happen to the NFL. So anyway,

16:56

what and what what what what? What

16:59

nonsensical thing will we all latch on

17:01

to next? Valentine's Day

17:03

is it Valentine's Day? Well,

17:06

it's Valentine's Day this week Jesus

17:08

it is got any plans. No.

17:11

Oh, okay well, I actually

17:14

I asked a people recently if they wanted

17:16

to be my Valentine and a lot of

17:19

People online said yes, so I've got like Valentine's

17:25

I know right? Isn't that great? I've got 12

17:29

You've got 12. Yeah, if you

17:31

catch my drift. Oh, yeah Yeah.

17:34

Yeah. Well good for you

17:36

son. Thanks. It's gonna be

17:38

a busy V day You heard it

17:40

right here everybody Jesus was not a

17:42

fan of the he gets us ads,

17:44

of course But Jesus

17:46

is a confirmed foot

17:49

freak Exactly. They

17:51

got that part, right? I

17:53

forgive them. Otherwise Jesus you have

17:55

a subscription to Only

17:58

feet comm you Know. It yeah I

18:00

saw lots of people with great seat on

18:02

their exact. I'm watching one of their live

18:04

streams right now in the background as we

18:06

podcast, so that's why you always was Feed

18:08

Them. Yes, well. You know

18:10

what? It's just a nice thing to do to

18:13

be for people. The people will still was their

18:15

feet or is that something more. The. People

18:17

used to do and humans have just

18:19

gotten dirtier. I think humans have gotten

18:21

lazier and so when they're still being

18:23

up in the shower, they might not

18:26

reach all the way down to their

18:28

feet. Maybe they have a flexibility issue

18:30

as well. Right now it's an area

18:32

near the loop and now it's called

18:34

a it says getting a many petty

18:37

yes So you you are really an

18:39

expert at giving people patties which I

18:41

would recommend for people as we approach

18:43

summer in the Northern hemisphere. Ah, definitely

18:45

get some a pedicure. See your feet are

18:48

looking good on the beach at the pool. Eccentric.

18:51

Cetera, Why? You're wearing flip

18:53

flops. I could totally go from anybody.

18:55

Pennies or always important for me. Now

18:57

I am I wearing the sandals so

19:00

my feet always have to look a

19:02

okay it makes your do. Will.

19:05

Be right off as it is,

19:07

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19:26

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19:38

Back to the Superbowl. Yes, Forty Niners players

19:40

are they didn't those Super Bowl overtime rules.

19:43

Mean, I didn't either. But. I get

19:45

a show has they're paid to know that

19:47

stuff but where you are reviewed training for

19:50

two weeks to blame. Now that's true. That's

19:52

true and united. So yeah yeah, that hazard

19:54

was. A

19:56

most was. that

19:59

was smite Most watch Super Bowl

20:01

2024 ads Tina Fey

20:03

Bradley Cooper Arnold Schwarzenegger Mr.

20:06

T and Scientology land

20:09

in YouTube's top 10 Scientology

20:12

what's up with that? Yeah. What

20:14

was the Scientology one? I don't even

20:16

remember they had several ads several ads

20:19

featuring Scientology so

20:21

and I'm just want to know who is

20:23

becoming a Scientologist

20:26

because they watched a Super Bowl

20:28

ad I

20:32

Sounds like that sounds right for me. That

20:34

sounds like they're finding their target

20:37

audience, right? Mm-hmm.

20:39

Like wow, I gotta check that website out.

20:42

Maybe yeah, I'll take a little test and

20:44

then boom they gotcha Next

20:48

thing, you know, you're a speed test

20:50

you're you're in the next

20:52

Top Gun movie Hey,

20:55

we have to bring up one more important news

20:57

item from the Super Bowl Beyonce

20:59

forget Taylor Yeah,

21:02

it's it's Beyonce season now Beyonce

21:05

announced Renaissance act 2 and

21:07

she's going country, baby March

21:10

29th and she dropped two

21:12

songs. We mean really you haven't heard the

21:14

new songs yet What?

21:17

No, I I was too tired from

21:19

the Super Bowl and then I went to sleep You're

21:23

an ally and then I What

21:26

I am an ally no, don't don't

21:28

say that Jesus no So,

21:33

yes, I feel like my

21:35

eye don't cancel me Jesus don't crucify

21:37

me no, no never you're here I'm

21:40

not strong enough to lift you up on the cross So

21:44

yes Renaissance act 2 March 29th She

21:47

kind of teased it slash announced it

21:49

through a Verizon ad during the Super

21:51

Bowl vomit Yep, two

21:54

songs came out 16 carriages and

21:56

Texas hold them The

21:58

latter I much prefer thus far. Cool.

22:00

Maybe so when album of the air.

22:02

For. The contrary when she may. Cool!

22:06

Wow. Well I never knew so

22:08

much about pop stars and music

22:10

before. Oh. Yeah until

22:12

I answered your life right? And so

22:14

yeah really you son, you have really

22:16

taken over. I'm what's with the So

22:19

Valentine's Day you saying you have twelve

22:21

and times So are they. Up

22:24

all. My disciples. So.

22:28

What? Would you say you call that situation

22:30

you're in with all of them? Is that

22:32

like a. Human

22:34

centipede sort of situation. I didn't

22:37

say all at the same time

22:39

by that sometimes yeah, can be

22:41

Dad was on us and upload.

22:44

A. Sort of Zola now doubles on

22:46

have club, or or or or.

22:49

Quadruple. That.

22:51

Sir Twelve. At.

22:53

A twofer, let's call it will Jesus!

22:55

Thank you so much for responding on

22:57

the issue of the he gets his

22:59

campaign and for your Super Bowl coverage.

23:02

I. Was obviously thinking about you

23:04

just in I can again I

23:06

could hear you squealing. I

23:09

like discovered from Regina. She

23:11

said it's it's a Baker's

23:13

Dozen to pay for some

23:15

high decipher. It's a Seizes Baker's

23:17

Dozen who Kelsey said, dirty

23:19

Dozen. There we go out

23:21

Silva's Ssl. Anyway, for speaking

23:23

of music, Ozzie Osborne says

23:25

anti semite con yea West sample

23:28

his music without permission. Boy eyes,

23:30

He was purchased. Will.

23:33

Be a post this on twitter of like

23:35

in all caps he posted in every was

23:37

on all castles he was it. Tiny,

23:39

I ask permission to sample a section

23:41

of a Nineteen Eighty Three live performance

23:44

of War Pigs from the U Festival

23:46

with out vocals he wrote. Em.

23:49

he wrote this in all caps refused

23:51

permission because he has an anti semite

23:53

and has caused untold heart ache to

23:55

many he went ahead and use the

23:57

sample anyway at his album listening party

23:59

last night I want no

24:01

association with this man yes

24:04

Aussie good for you was that your

24:06

best Aussie Osborn impersonation Oh

24:09

Sharon Sharon Sharon Sharon

24:12

can't call you a Sharon that's

24:14

all that's my best I used to watch that

24:18

Wow that was pretty good Sharon

24:22

Sharon we'll fuck it up

24:24

with other Sharon I should read the whole thing

24:26

numbers again all right come

24:29

on dance Jesus day Kanye

24:31

West as permission to sample a

24:34

section of a 1983 live performance

24:37

Sharon a boy peg from the

24:39

US festival of vocal Sharon refused

24:41

for their share because he is

24:44

an anti-stop I'm not

24:46

proud of this yeah very good

24:48

very good Jesus very good yeah

24:51

I'm sure that he wouldn't be able to say that

24:54

it's a good thing he typed it yeah poor guy

24:56

he's in rough shape these days not

24:58

as rough as Toby Keith though yeah

25:02

apparently a country

25:05

star passed away

25:07

last week and then

25:10

people were talking about the Dixie chicks and

25:14

remembering apparently he was like a real

25:17

kind of a jerk back in the day in the

25:21

Iraq war days yeah and

25:24

people don't forget that

25:27

was the week that was no

25:29

further comment on Toby Keith yeah

25:31

let's take some questions

25:33

from the audience who sounds good

25:35

yeah we're live streaming now across

25:37

multiple platforms if you've got a

25:39

question just type it up as

25:42

a comment and me

25:44

and Jesus will answer live oh

25:46

yeah and then there was that someone says

25:48

what what was up with that trippy Kennedy

25:50

commercials as Maui nurse good question Kennedy

25:53

Kennedy Kennedy Kenny that song was running through

25:55

my head for the following half hour after

25:57

the commercial aired yeah They

26:00

began as he. Did his comment did?

26:02

But what about it? I didn't I don't

26:04

remember seeing many of these. I was on

26:06

a couple. Eddie's I mean guy was like

26:09

I it was a as a commercial for.

26:11

Rfk. Isn't like

26:14

his twenty Twenty Four campaign. Or

26:17

wouldn't of money and time. I'd.

26:21

Say he's writing and have the same as

26:23

I just er sorry I haven't thought about

26:25

this in. Months. And months And

26:27

months. He. And his fact that

26:29

he spent money on a Superbowl ad is

26:31

this like what is embarrassment? I

26:34

doubt it says in own reminds me

26:37

of Money down. He reminds me of.

26:40

That. One. Roy. Brother

26:42

in succession. Oh yeah. Connor

26:44

gonna Roy manner. the older

26:47

guy? yeah or man. So.

26:50

Connor. Yeah, this guy is

26:52

basically Connor Reuters. Always some

26:55

rich but said it's in

26:57

O'connor Rory? maybe Steve Forbes?

26:59

There's always some. A.

27:03

New. Domain billionaire who's got

27:05

the money to spend on that?

27:09

Jesus next question. Yes,

27:11

I'm sorry. my throat is. I.

27:14

Feel. On weird after that Ozzie Osborne

27:16

impression. Roy. Are you

27:18

a Gemini? Jesus know I'm a Capricorn

27:20

cause I was born on Christmas. So

27:22

okay. Thank you. I thought you're going

27:24

to say I was actually born every

27:27

surface. You. Weren't new. That was

27:29

when you died and. That's.

27:31

When you're on a lived that's right

27:33

on a lived rag. Been o Six

27:35

said why did you give us country

27:37

music? What did we do to deserve

27:39

that? I would have preferred another great

27:41

slide. Oh my guys, come on Century

27:43

Killer or to guide. Don't you put

27:45

that evil on me. Damn. After

27:48

wait, wait What? Jesus. I think we're

27:50

on different sides of this. Not.

27:53

In: I'm yeah, I'm sorry, like and I'm

27:55

just saying you like it. i

27:58

i don't think it's worse

28:00

than a great flood. Hey

28:03

viewer, can you believe this guy?

28:05

He actually... He

28:07

likes country. Jesus

28:10

likes country. Oh, oh my

28:12

me. He just admit it. Oh,

28:14

oh, sorry. Sorry. Oh, hey, what's up, Jesus? I

28:17

was just having an aside with the

28:19

viewer. Sure, right. You just go ahead

28:21

and have another joint right now. I

28:24

see those eyes. I see

28:26

those eyes. What are you talking about? Rich

28:28

is defending is on my side.

28:30

He says there's plenty of positive

28:33

country music. Yeah, it's not all

28:35

like Jesus Bible Belt worshipy types, if that's

28:38

what some people are thinking. Yeah, there's some

28:40

good country music. I'm not gonna lie. Okay,

28:42

I was just having some fun with

28:44

you Jesus. Sure, there's that Old

28:47

Town Road song. Yeah,

28:49

and then there's working 9 to 5. Working 9

28:51

to 5. Bump!

28:54

Well, no way to make the... And

28:59

now there's the forthcoming Beyonce album. So

29:03

much to look forward to, though God and

29:05

I are aligned on this front. Kid Rock

29:07

sucks. Yes, Joe, we agree with you there.

29:09

Kid Rock sucks. Since

29:12

the first day that I ever heard

29:14

Kid Rock's music... I

29:16

was like, and I

29:18

was like, wait, what?

29:22

Are you saying that this is popular now? I

29:25

was like, wait, what? Is the

29:27

world bad enough? And

29:30

then I kept talking over Jesus. Shut

29:33

up! I

29:35

regret the day that I

29:37

visited Kid Rock's big

29:39

honky tonk in Nashville.

29:43

The biggest rifles I've ever seen on the

29:45

walls in that bar. It

29:48

was a fun vibe, but I

29:50

wish I did not support the man. Did they

29:52

have you on a cross up there on the

29:55

wall? No, no. Next to the animals? Wouldn't

29:58

put it past them. Mm-hmm. would be

30:00

a bad look. Lucy said, what can you

30:02

do about Jay-Z? I think he wants your

30:04

job. Honestly, I've said it recently. It's like,

30:06

if you're a millionaire

30:09

or a billionaire, and you

30:12

go up on stage with the Grammys and you're

30:14

like, complaining

30:16

because you haven't won the exact

30:18

Grammy that you wanted. Mm-hmm.

30:21

It's like, you know, I get it. It's

30:23

weird. Just maybe let it slide. Yeah.

30:26

There's people who have nothing. Anyway, that's just

30:29

how I take it. I think you're

30:31

right. Because of you, Jesus. Because of you. You

30:33

got me thinking about all the good, you know.

30:35

The good in people. You made me so progressive,

30:37

Jesus. Oh, I love this question

30:39

from John. Why is

30:41

God so old, yet Jesus is

30:44

still young? I am

30:46

forever a millennial. I don't like

30:48

that question. Well, I like it.

30:50

I like it. I think

30:52

it's a great question, and I thank John. I

30:54

think it's ageist. Wow. I

30:57

think it's making me feel good about myself,

31:00

and I'm just perpetually a

31:02

millennial. That's it. I'm young, hip.

31:04

I'm good for your image, God.

31:07

Come on. I

31:09

keep us young and hip. I

31:11

do all the young and hipness for both of

31:13

us. You're saying that I'm old. Well,

31:16

I'm just saying I

31:18

know more about Beyonce than you do. Yeah,

31:22

well, that's for sure. You know

31:24

more about all that stuff than I do. It's

31:26

all about the skincare. A

31:29

corpse says Jesus moisturizes and uses

31:31

sunscreen. I sure do. And,

31:33

yeah, I might have some good

31:36

surgeons from time to time. Really?

31:40

I never knew that. You've had plastic surgery,

31:42

Jesus. You've gone under the knife? A

31:45

little God pod scoop for everybody. Wow.

31:48

Maybe a little, little toxy-toxy here and

31:50

there. Botox? Something

31:52

I didn't know. Yep.

31:55

Jesus, you're full of surprises. The

31:57

thing about heaven is we got the best of

31:59

the best. up here because eventually

32:01

and it's sad but eventually

32:03

everybody passes right and

32:06

then we judge we

32:08

you know the living in the dead that whole thing

32:11

and then we take the good

32:13

ones up here let them in those pearly gates and

32:15

then we're like hey can you give me

32:17

a little nip and tuck over here yes

32:23

Jesus go off exactly

32:26

we say the best doctors you

32:28

know you actually were lined up

32:30

for hell but if you give

32:32

us a discount on your surgeries

32:34

we'll let you come up

32:36

here into heaven how many operations have you

32:38

had in the last two thousand years Jesus

32:41

over the last two thousand what look I

32:43

mean you know every century I got to

32:45

kind of re-up the work so it's

32:47

been a few dozen at this point wow wow

32:50

wow wow I think

32:52

that the issue though is that you're

32:54

saying that I'm old I haven't forgotten

32:56

that you were move on from this no

32:58

I want to talk about this age ism

33:00

thing are you saying that I'm too

33:02

old to be God I know

33:05

absolutely not are you saying that I

33:07

don't have powers of recall like

33:10

I'm not you know I can't remember

33:12

where I am oh yeah are you

33:14

are you saying that I can't be

33:16

God anymore is you try to

33:18

know what's going on with Biden no are you

33:21

trying to are you trying to take

33:23

my job as God's son because

33:26

I like you know like Logan

33:28

Roy just never step down and you

33:32

and you want the top job listener

33:35

it's just me and you now I

33:38

do feel like I could step in and take

33:40

over and do a better job sometimes than my

33:42

father but he's stubborn he doesn't

33:44

want to go I'm like dad

33:46

come on it's your time you can you can

33:48

let go go on vacation I'll

33:50

make your Facebook posts I'll do the live-streaming

33:53

he's like no no no it's fine everything's

33:55

fine he won't leave if you

33:57

have any ideas for I can kick him out let me

33:59

know Hey, Dad. So

34:01

what else do you want to talk about? I

34:04

heard everything you just said. Huh.

34:07

Yeah. Kaseidia79 said, Jesus

34:09

sounds like Apocalypse from the X-Men.

34:12

New bod every few hundred years. Hey,

34:15

that reminds me. How about that Deadpool trailer? Did

34:18

you see that? Yeah, yeah, yeah,

34:20

yeah. It was really funny. Well,

34:22

I saw what they would show to me, and

34:24

then they were like, watch the full trailer online.

34:26

Because we're not spending the money for a full

34:28

trailer during the Super Bowl. Did you watch the

34:31

full trailer online? I did. It was very funny.

34:33

So you've now... Oh, okay. Yeah.

34:37

Well, I should do that. Well,

34:40

yeah, you should. A lot of references to

34:42

Disney and Marvel. You know

34:44

how it's kind of like, what's that

34:46

word? Like self-aware, since now they're

34:48

owned by Marvel. It's pretty good.

34:51

Yeah. Aaron says, God,

34:53

you are ageless. It's

34:59

true. Thank you so much, Aaron. See,

35:02

that's the praise that I needed right now to get me through the day.

35:06

I just need a little morsel every day.

35:09

Just a little bit of praise. Because

35:11

I'm very insecure, okay? Extremely

35:15

insecure. And Veronica says,

35:17

Go on vacation, God. Even

35:19

you need to relax. I agree. One day

35:21

of rest isn't enough. You

35:24

need like a week. A week. A

35:27

week-long Sunday. Yeah,

35:30

but then when I go on vacation too long and

35:32

bad things happen, everybody's like, God, where were you? All

35:35

right. Why'd you leave? Are

35:40

you sure? Are

35:42

you sure? You want me to go on vacation? More? Okay.

35:46

Okay. I heard that

35:48

little John... I was annoyed that

35:50

I didn't see him at the Super Bowl because

35:52

I wanted to hear little John in person go,

35:54

Yeah! He wasn't? I

35:57

thought he was there. Somebody was going to... Yeah,

36:00

yeah, yeah, yeah the speakers I Heard

36:05

that he's putting out a Meditation

36:07

guided meditation course. Ooh Yeah,

36:10

so just like he's like, yeah Okay,

36:15

okay Little

36:18

John was there I was running it.

36:20

Yep. I Thought

36:22

the Super Bowl was half. Oh,

36:24

yeah. Yeah. Oh good little

36:27

John even will I am was there He was difficult

36:29

to spot because I think he was the one wearing

36:31

the helmet He got a

36:33

feature at one point. All right, I was blinched. Let's

36:35

move on. Okay, ludicrous came out

36:38

and he had on like an entire

36:42

Body armor. Mm-hmm. Yeah,

36:45

I liked the theme it was like, you know marching

36:47

band and The

36:51

wicked movie yeah that trailer, you know,

36:53

yeah that looks pretty good Now here's

36:56

the thing that gets me about this

36:58

wicked movie. It's actually two movies They're

37:01

splitting it into two parts one this

37:03

holiday then the next one holiday 2025

37:07

I'm just like do we really need to split

37:09

wicked into two? They didn't even

37:11

call it part one in this trailer But

37:13

I guess so presumably what we saw during

37:15

the Super Bowl was clips from part

37:17

one and two. Yeah, Jesus They need to split

37:20

it in two for the money Oh

37:23

Listen, they're gonna get you hooked on the for they

37:25

were they didn't want to ruin the fun by telling

37:27

you that it was part one Of two because you

37:30

know, they knew you got in like Got

37:33

but got to pay for those Super Bowl commercials

37:35

somehow Jim

37:38

is also pointing out that John Stewart's

37:40

return is tonight the night that we're

37:42

recording Excited about that.

37:45

I'm excited about that as well. I

37:48

Gotta I gotta tune in I gotta watch it tonight.

37:50

It is on at 11 p.m. It's past

37:53

my bedtime So I'll probably catch it in

37:55

the morning Mm-hmm

37:57

Rory said are we still gonna be?

38:00

be here in 25 2025

38:02

got any comments will the humans still

38:05

be around next year sure why

38:07

why not oh I

38:09

mean look at the state of the world are you

38:11

asking if I'm gonna do the end of the world

38:13

thing I mean I don't think anything

38:15

the humans have going on is gonna lead

38:17

well I

38:19

mean you know maybe I mean

38:23

there's a war or two going on that's not

38:25

always I always forget about the nukes yeah

38:28

little buggers aren't they your

38:31

guess is as good as mine good

38:34

luck that's

38:37

why people say hey Jesus I Jesus is coming back

38:39

to earth he's coming back to earth I'm like no

38:41

I'm not do you see what's

38:43

going on down there I'm enjoying just

38:45

keeping an eye on things from a

38:47

distance and then I talked

38:49

to y'all through the God pod from a

38:52

distance Jesus is watching

38:54

you doo-doo-doo Wow yeah

38:58

we'll see how John Stewart does back in the

39:01

captain's chair I'm sure it'll

39:03

do great it's exciting mm-hmm

39:05

Jesus you're not appearing on earth on

39:08

toast anymore asks mostly wibbly yeah

39:11

I've decided to eliminate carbs from

39:13

my diet and part of that

39:15

means not appearing on toast anymore

39:17

either but I'll come back

39:19

on like a grapefruit

39:23

or something maybe a pumpkin

39:26

this holiday stay tuned we'll

39:29

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41:03

FCC declares AI generated voices

41:05

and robocalls are illegal. That's

41:08

good. That's good. How

41:10

about just getting rid of robocalls entirely? That

41:12

would be even better. That'd be even better. Oh,

41:14

what's this? We've been talking about nonsense. Should we

41:16

talk about serious things? Like what?

41:20

Serious things are boring. Boring

41:23

and they're depressing. I

41:25

just can't anymore. Jesus. Yeah.

41:28

So long. I did it for so long. He's

41:30

thrown in the towel. I give enough. You

41:32

must have other questions. I'm quiet quitting. Okay. It

41:35

doesn't matter what I say. Humans

41:38

don't listen to me. Okay. Yeah.

41:41

Yeah. I know.

41:43

You tried though. You tried. I

41:47

did. Oh, you know what I did over the

41:49

weekend? You know, I did over the weekend. I

41:51

tried that new Apple vision pro headset. I went

41:53

to an Apple store down on earth under cover,

41:55

of course, and I did their

41:58

demo and But

42:00

believe it or not, I'm an Apple fanboy, but I was

42:02

not sold on it. I said, you know what, $3,500? No

42:06

thank you. Wow. I'm not

42:08

impressed. I'll wait for like the fifth generation

42:10

when it's cheaper. How much would you pay?

42:13

How much? I would

42:15

pay $1,000. Wow.

42:19

Yeah. That's a lot of feet, Jesus.

42:22

No. I gotta

42:24

get on only feet and sell pictures of

42:27

my own feet, I suppose. Could

42:30

you? Could you also start selling some of that wine you're

42:32

making? Oh yeah, absolutely.

42:35

We need money. We've brainstormed names before for

42:37

the wine. You know?

42:39

Oh yeah, I forgot. Yeah, I'm

42:42

forgetting the names of them. Listeners, you got

42:44

names for my wine? I'm gonna

42:46

go meet with Costco soon and see if they'll

42:49

sell my wine at those

42:51

warehouses you have down on earth. So let

42:53

me know. Yeah,

42:55

I'm definitely not getting, all I know is everybody

42:57

that I've seen wearing one looks like... A

43:01

dork? Yeah, it's

43:03

not a good look. I saw Logan Paul

43:05

wearing one. I was like, yeah,

43:07

that makes sense. Brian said,

43:09

is it always red

43:11

wine with you Jesus? Yes, I'd much

43:13

prefer red. Any

43:16

time of year. It's just, I don't know, it

43:18

just tastes better. Yeah. It's

43:20

wine. When you think of wine, you think of red

43:22

wine. You don't think of white. Yeah. We

43:25

are not calling it Jesus juice. Everybody wants to

43:27

call it Jesus juice. We are not calling it

43:29

Jesus juice. No, yeah, that's something else. Yeah, that's

43:31

something else. God shine.

43:35

Aww. Cause he shines his

43:37

light down on thee. Like moonshine,

43:39

but God. Right, I think

43:41

that's the point. And

43:44

some cheese. Yeah, I'm gonna come up with

43:46

some pairings of wine and cheese. I

43:48

love a good like Gouda, like a smoked Gouda. Yeah,

43:52

the name that we came up with a long time

43:54

ago, it was like very

43:56

clever, way better than Jesus juice, but we

43:58

forgot what it was. it was. Maybe

44:01

it wasn't that good. Maybe we

44:03

just think it was good in our heads.

44:06

It's his cousin Larry Christ that

44:08

turns water into Bud Light. Oh Jesus,

44:10

did we talk about this? So

44:13

crib your enthusiasm is back and

44:15

I'm excited to watch it. Yeah, I actually, I'm

44:18

caught up. Are you up to date? You're caught

44:20

up? I haven't. How many episodes are

44:22

there now? Only two. There's

44:24

two, cool. Yeah. So did you

44:27

see this thing where Elmo got

44:29

attacked by Larry David? Yes,

44:32

not on the show, but on the

44:35

Today Show while he was promoting. On

44:37

the Today Show. Yeah, it was disgusting.

44:39

I was second. Did we talk about

44:41

this last week? I honestly can't remember.

44:43

No, we were talking about Elmo, everyone

44:45

trauma dumping on Elmo. Elmo has had

44:47

quite a sad couple of weeks. The

44:50

entire internet trauma dumped on

44:52

Elmo. Then Elmo gets attacked

44:55

by billionaire Larry David.

44:57

And then, and then he

45:01

gets a tepid apology. You know,

45:04

that was really funny. The Today Show has

45:06

made Elmo a part, or sorry, made Larry

45:09

apologize. Did they do it or did Elmo

45:11

do it? Because Elmo's demeanor

45:13

during that was like, you got

45:15

something to say, Larry? You got something

45:17

to say, Larry? I'm

45:21

sorry, Elmo. And then Elmo was like,

45:23

you're damn right, you're sorry. No, that's

45:25

not how it went down. Elmo was

45:27

very forgiving, which I think is a

45:30

lesson we can all take with us.

45:32

I think Elmo was like, Elmo was

45:34

like, thank you, Larry. Thank

45:36

you. Thank you, Larry. I thought

45:39

of names for my wine. Would you like to

45:41

hear some? Yeah. Savior

45:44

selection, Miracle

45:46

Merlot, Gospel

45:48

Grapes, Covenant

45:50

Cabernet. God

45:53

doesn't like any of these. Resurrection Rose.

45:57

They're all good. They're all okay.

45:59

Thanks. all good. Okay.

46:02

Jesus, you have

46:04

some great wine names.

46:06

Now, if only the wine quality could

46:09

be as good as the names. We

46:11

really have something here.

46:14

Resurrection Rose would be a hit at

46:16

brunches all across the world. I'm just

46:19

thinking, like, what better drink for a

46:21

brunch on a Saturday than Resurrection Rose?

46:23

It's like, bring me back to life.

46:27

Okay, I want to address this rumor right here. Sean

46:29

says, I thought you were broke, but here you are

46:31

running Super Bowl ads. Sean,

46:34

that wasn't us, okay? It was a

46:37

deeply flawed and troubled

46:39

organization who are not associated with

46:41

us. Yeah. Rewatch the

46:44

episode, okay? We've

46:47

been very, we've been, see, this is the

46:49

problem, Jesus. We're very clear on how we

46:51

feel, where we stand. But do humans have

46:53

the time? Do they even watch what we

46:55

say? Do they even listen? We're

46:57

in video form now. It's never

46:59

been easier. It's

47:01

never been easier to hear

47:04

what Jesus thinks about things.

47:07

And then, you know, just,

47:09

you just, the humans, man, free

47:12

will was mistake, Jesus. No,

47:16

no, it really was. But

47:18

free will created this gem, the blood of

47:21

Christ wine from God's favorite mathematician. I love

47:23

that one. The blood of Christ wine. I'll

47:26

use that. Thank you. I think

47:28

Jesus juice is better. Wow.

47:31

Okay. I'm going with that one. Does

47:34

Jesus have a Facebook name? Oh,

47:37

they're wondering if you have a page. We should spin

47:39

off a page for you, Jesus. Oh, I would love

47:41

that. Just post all day. That'd be fun. Okay.

47:45

We'll work on that. It's in the

47:48

works, everybody. It's already something I plan

47:50

to do. And now we got Jesus

47:52

on board. It's great. It's

47:54

great. Okay. We

48:00

talked about everything we wanted

48:03

to talk about and we answered some

48:05

questions. Jesus has been very

48:07

clear on

48:09

the foot

48:11

situation. And,

48:14

you know, no, no, no,

48:16

no, no. You keep me... He gets

48:19

us, sort of gets us, but

48:21

the people behind it, we do

48:23

not associate with. They're evil. They're

48:25

anti-abortion. They're anti-LGBTQ. And the list

48:27

goes on. Yeah, it was Republican

48:30

Jesus that was running those

48:32

ads. Yes, exactly. You

48:35

know, you're evil doppelganger. It's like,

48:38

you know, in the

48:40

multiverse of

48:43

the GCU, the God character universe,

48:45

there's evil versions of you and me,

48:48

Jesus. We

48:50

haven't met them yet. We haven't met them yet.

48:53

But if you keep watching this show and supporting

48:55

us here on

48:57

Monday nights at 6 p.m.

49:00

Eastern, 3 p.m. Pacific, we

49:03

will be able to,

49:06

you know, we'll be able to

49:08

grow. Maybe someday we'll have evil doppelgangers,

49:10

Jesus. Wouldn't that be something? Uh...

49:14

As long as I don't have to be in

49:17

the same room as them, I guess it's okay.

49:19

For storytelling purposes. Yeah, if it's for entertainment purposes,

49:21

sure. If that's what the humans want, that's fine.

49:24

Yeah. Okay. Okay. Let's

49:26

move on to Blessings and Smites, Jesus. I

49:29

want to smite that Kennedy commercial and

49:32

the catchy theme song. I

49:34

would like to smite, speaking of

49:36

music, Travis Kelsey singing Viva Las

49:39

Vegas. I

49:41

would like to once again bless Taylor

49:43

Swift's private jet pilots who

49:46

are working overtime this week. I

49:49

want to bless

49:51

Usher, Topless,

49:55

and I want to bless

49:57

every creator on onlyfeed.com. And

50:00

I of course want once it's like

50:02

the people behind the he gets us

50:05

campaign Jesus Jesus

50:07

Christ those are some unexpected

50:09

takes Well,

50:12

actually no, it's you just backing up everything you

50:14

said the whole episode good for you

50:16

Jesus I would like to bless

50:19

Yeah, Taylor Swift from the boyfriend once again

50:22

Congratulations on winning the

50:24

Super Bowl first year in the league. I

50:27

think it's great. I I'm

50:30

enjoying the reactions online I'm

50:34

enjoying the tears This is

50:36

I'm enjoying this the masses stereo

50:38

That's what I am here for

50:41

folks the entertainment that you provide

50:43

and you are doing just fantastic

50:47

Distracting me from the abyss Keeping

50:49

weird y'all we love it. So

50:51

weird Whatever just keeps

50:54

me from thinking about the

50:56

reality on the planet that I created

50:58

Jesus I loved your Super

51:01

Bowl coverage. It's been an absolute pleasure.

51:03

Thank you, bro covering this football season

51:05

with you same, bro. Yeah,

51:07

bro Seriously, what

51:10

are we gonna do until next season? Yeah, what are we gonna

51:12

do next Sunday? I guess we'll have to like Volunteer

51:15

or oh man Yeah,

51:18

the week after it ends just like It's

51:21

the worst as an el did a great skit

51:23

about that a couple weeks ago Do

51:26

with my life I

51:28

have to go socialize with other people now Television

51:32

I've already watched ten

51:34

three times And

51:40

yes might might might who

51:42

should I smite this week? Kennedy

51:44

Kennedy Kennedy Kennedy. He's

51:47

a nobody the bro flakes The

51:50

bro flakes wherever you may be Thanks

51:53

Jesus for a wonderful show. Thank

51:55

you, pa and thank you

51:57

everybody in the audience for joining

52:00

listening as we just hang out and

52:04

shoot shit. You know what I'm saying?

52:06

Just talk about the latest stuff. Jesus

52:09

here in heaven, me in

52:13

my office on the moon, looking

52:15

down at Earth. Here's some extra smites

52:17

really quick. Monique said, smite Larry for

52:19

being mean to Elmo. Inmate1420

52:22

said, smite my bitch

52:24

boss please. UramajamaDeb

52:28

said, smite Wasabi, that stuff

52:30

is evil. So

52:33

there you go. There's some extra ones.

52:35

Alright. Those are your community smites. That's

52:37

a new feature here. With

52:40

our powers combined. Here on the Godpod.

52:43

Alright. Well, thanks everybody. We'll see you next week.

52:46

And until next time,

52:49

the Lord has spoken.

52:56

Thank you.