0:15

Pushkin. I

0:23

was having my annual medical checkup. The

0:25

nurse measured my weight in blood pressure, She

0:27

listened to my heart, and then did some blood work.

0:30

Most of my test results came back fine except

0:32

one. My CRP levels were

0:35

kind of high. But I didn't

0:37

actually know what CRP levels were, so

0:39

I turned to Google. Turns

0:41

out, high CRP levels are a sign of bodily

0:43

inflammation, which can increase the risk

0:45

of chronic health conditions like kidney disease,

0:47

cancer, dementia, and premature death.

0:50

I'm no medical doctor, but that did

0:53

not sound good. I returned

0:55

to the clinic to go over the results. So

0:57

this inflammation thing, I asked, what's causing

1:00

it? Inflammation? My doctor

1:02

replied, can be lots of things, but

1:04

it's usually a sign that your immune system is

1:06

on the defense. But we often

1:08

see levels like that when patients are experiencing

1:10

a period of intense stress. Have

1:13

you been going through any stress lately? I

1:15

fidgeted, well, I said, then

1:18

launched into all the stuff on my plate. I

1:20

talked about how I'd cared for over five hundred

1:23

students during a pandemic while also

1:25

running a lab while also making a podcast.

1:28

I admitted I hadn't been exercising or

1:30

eating well, and that I was feeling totally

1:32

overwhelmed. My doctor,

1:34

a fan of the show, gave a smirk. So

1:37

the famous happiness expert has been all stressed

1:39

out? Huh yeah,

1:42

yeah, I guess she has been, and apparently

1:45

it's making her ill.

1:48

Stress is a normal bodily response. It

1:50

can be triggered by external factors like major

1:53

life changes, relationship troubles, financial

1:55

worries, and troubles at work, but also

1:57

by internal things like self criticism,

2:00

unrealistic expectations, and being too

2:02

busy all the time. Stress

2:04

is just the body's natural response to a perceived

2:06

threat. But as I know well, that response

2:09

doesn't feel good. It can make us anxious,

2:11

sad, and irritable. But it also hurts

2:14

us physically, causing headaches and insomnia

2:16

and digestive problems. And if

2:18

we leave stress unchecked, it can badly

2:20

damage our bodies and our immune systems.

2:24

Stress is a happiness challenge that I and

2:26

so many others face on a daily basis.

2:29

But is there anything we can do about it for

2:32

my own sake? I really hope so. Our

2:37

minds are constantly telling us what to do to be happy.

2:39

But what if our minds are wrong? What if our

2:41

minds are lying to us, leading us away

2:43

from what will really make us happy. The

2:46

good news is that understanding the science of the

2:48

mind can point us all back in the right direction.

2:50

You're listening to the Happiness Lab with doctor Laurie

2:53

Santos.

3:00

At around the time I was thinking about my own struggle

3:02

with stress, a new book landed on my

3:04

desk. There seemed to be an odd mismatch

3:07

between the author and the subject matter, but

3:09

after reading it, I realized there was a

3:11

lot I could learn from his experience.

3:13

Hey, Steve, I'm in the car because

3:16

for some reason, all the traffic lights on since sent Boulevard

3:18

are out.

3:19

When scientists studies stress, they often

3:21

turn to one particular group of very stressed

3:23

out people, caregivers, and

3:26

there's no shortage of such research subjects.

3:28

Around thirty percent of US adults provide

3:31

some form of care to say a child

3:33

with special needs, a sick partner,

3:35

or even an aging parent. It's

3:37

around the clock job that's often really

3:40

brutal. Thanks so much for taking the time.

3:42

Of course, the person I wanted to talk

3:44

to had a hectic life before he took on the tough

3:46

role of a caretaker, and he's still

3:48

rushing around La from meeting to meeting today

3:51

traffic allowing, of course, do you want to

3:53

talk now? Do you want to wait till you get back to your place?

3:55

What's better?

3:56

Let's start right now because I have another

3:58

appointment.

3:59

But I'm thrilled to talk to you, but

4:01

not as thrilled as I was. You see,

4:03

I'm not just a fan of Steve's book, Time

4:05

to Think Caregiving for my Hero. I'm

4:08

also a fan of Steve's acting. Steve

4:11

Gutenberg is the star of some of my favorite

4:13

eighties movies, Three Men in a Baby

4:15

Cocoon and Short Circuit Number

4:18

Five is a Lie, and

4:20

Steve attributes much of his amazing career

4:22

success to his father.

4:24

He was my hero, and my dad was really

4:27

a very tough guy who was a US Army

4:30

Airborne ranger, one of the first

4:32

Jewish ones. And then my dad became

4:34

a New York City policeman and he actually

4:37

went to the New York City Police Academy. So

4:39

when I auditioned for Police Academy

4:41

the movie, he said, why don't you wear my police Academy

4:44

shirt? And I said, yeah, that

4:46

would be great.

4:47

The director asked about Steve's shirt and

4:49

seemed impressed by the actor's attention to detail.

4:52

After all, Steve was reading for character

4:55

Kerrie Mahoney, who was also the son

4:57

of a police officer. It was a great

4:59

start, but the audition went

5:01

terribly.

5:02

I called my dad and I said, Dad, you

5:04

know, I wore your shirt, but I don't think I

5:06

got this thing. You know, nobody laughed,

5:09

nobody clapped, nothing. He said, well, you

5:11

never go just give it a little time.

5:13

My dad was really positive

5:15

thinker. He just said it'll all work out.

5:17

Take your time with it. About ten minutes later, my agent

5:19

called and I said, oh, I feel lousy. I did terrible.

5:22

He goes, no, you got it. He said what?

5:24

And that was the phone call that changed my life. And I

5:27

think that my dad's lucky shir It really helped me.

5:29

So Steve was going to star in Police Academy.

5:32

What could possibly go wrong?

5:34

Actually, my manager saw Police Academy.

5:37

He said, this is going to be the worst movie

5:39

ever. I'm going to put you in a TV series

5:41

Tomorrow.

5:42

Steve landed a role in a spy series made

5:45

by Blake Edwards.

5:46

He was a great director, directed Breakfast

5:48

and Tiffany's and all the Pink Panthers.

5:51

Steve's dad was incredibly supportive of his

5:53

new role and wanted to join his son on

5:55

set, but that might have also had something

5:57

to do with Blake Edward's famous wife.

6:00

My dad wanted to come out because he thought

6:02

maybe you'd get to meet Julie.

6:04

Andrews Stanley Gutenberg. Set visit

6:06

coincided with a short delay in shooting. Steve's

6:09

character was supposed to jump off a thirty foot

6:11

roof and Steve didn't want to do the stunt

6:13

himself.

6:14

And my dad was looking up there and said to Blake

6:16

Edwards, you know I could do that, and

6:19

the director Blake Edwards said yeah, but you don't

6:21

want to do it, do you? And he said, yeah, I'll

6:23

do it. I'm airborn rajor. I jumped from airplane

6:26

some thousands of feet.

6:27

Stanley made the jump, and as he was finishing

6:29

up the stunt, it became clear that he wasn't

6:31

the only visitor on the lot.

6:33

All of a sudden, this Rose Royce pulls up and

6:35

out of it comes Julie Andrews, and

6:38

my dad looks down there and says,

6:41

Julie Andrews Julia Hedgers and

6:44

Julie Andrews looked up and I guess asked who that was.

6:46

He said, oh, was a good bug. And

6:48

he said, oh my god, I wanted to meet you.

6:50

He says, well, here I am.

6:52

So Steve's dad got to play the hero and

6:54

meet his movie.

6:55

Idol, and that was a big kick

6:58

for me.

6:59

Steve's dad was a caring, positive guy

7:01

who also took great joy at his powerful

7:03

physique. But age and infirmity

7:05

pay little respect to such things.

7:07

He said, look at my thigh, Yes, look

7:10

how big my thighs are. And

7:12

I would say, dad, but you're still tough, Dad, You're

7:14

still tough.

7:15

Stanley was diagnosed with kidney failure, a

7:18

disease that immediately reversed the Gutenberg

7:20

family roles. Steve, along

7:22

with his sister were now cast as caregivers

7:25

with all the stress that entails.

7:27

And I was a reluctant caregiver because I didn't want

7:29

to see my dad like that.

7:33

As many of us know, being a caregiver

7:36

is very challenging.

7:37

Doctor Alissa Epple is one of many scientists

7:40

studying stress and caregivers.

7:43

It's a job that doesn't end twenty

7:45

four to seven, and that's because

7:47

we care so much, We're so connected

7:50

to another's well being, we feel responsible

7:52

for it, and that doesn't end.

7:55

Alyssa is a professor a UCSF

7:58

and the author of the Stress prescription seven

8:00

Days to More Joy and Ease. She

8:03

explained that caregivers, like so many of

8:05

us, are often harmed by the very biological

8:07

reaction that's supposed to help us.

8:10

Our stress response is the

8:13

only reason we're all here, the only reason

8:15

our ancestors have survived.

8:17

Thanks to those ancestors, we've inherited

8:19

a unique biological control center,

8:21

the autonomic nervous system, which

8:23

allows our brains to switch instantly from

8:26

normal processes like breathing or digesting

8:28

food, to the high energy fighter flight

8:30

activities we need for emergencies like

8:33

sprinting away from a tiger or punching an

8:35

attacker. Whenever our brains perceive

8:37

a threat, this fighter flight system kicks

8:39

into high gear. We breathe quicker,

8:41

our hearts pump faster, our pupils dilate,

8:44

and our brains release energy rich glucose

8:46

into the blood. This response allows

8:48

us to react faster, see better, and

8:51

summon the muscle power required to flee

8:53

or tackle an oncoming threat. Neuro

8:55

Scientists like to think of this fight or flight response

8:58

kind of like jamming your foot on a gas pedal,

9:00

and if the brain decides a particular threat isn't

9:03

going away, it will keep that response

9:05

pressed to the metal. That's when we launch

9:07

a hormone cyclone orem glands

9:09

release substances like cortisol, which

9:11

keep our energy up and our muscles at the ready

9:14

at least until the threat passes. And

9:17

that's when our brains finally hit the brakes.

9:19

We relax, our muscles and our bodies

9:21

switch back to running the normal rest and digest

9:23

processes we need for everyday life. The

9:26

problem is the modern world leaves

9:28

our fight or flight mode switched on way longer

9:31

than it should, which means our digestive,

9:33

sexual, and sleep functioning gets all screwed

9:35

up. We up our risk for high blood

9:37

pressure and headaches. We spend our days

9:40

feeling irritable and.

9:41

Anxious, our bodies really living

9:43

in a chronically aroused state

9:45

that we don't even notice anymore.

9:47

All this would be bad enough if we only freaked

9:49

out about our actual daily stressors, but

9:52

part of.

9:52

The problem with our stress

9:55

today is that we keep it alive with

9:57

our thoughts, because things aren't

10:00

always happening, but they can be

10:02

in our mind if we take them with us and

10:04

we ruminate about what's happened,

10:06

or we are worrying about what might happen

10:08

next, and we're all challenged

10:10

by that to some extent, and especially

10:12

right now, because things

10:15

are more unstable than they

10:17

used to be. We live in an unstable

10:19

climate, in an unstable political

10:21

world, and then we still have

10:24

our daily drama that we need

10:26

to cope with as well.

10:27

It's a lot, and as I have

10:29

definitely experienced in my own life, we

10:32

usually react to these daily mental dramas

10:34

in ways that make things even worse.

10:36

For so many of us, it really is about

10:39

rushing, about creating

10:41

a schedule that has no spaciousness

10:44

in it, that has no time for breaks,

10:46

and it doesn't match our value as usually

10:49

we don't have time for people, we don't

10:51

have time for health or eating

10:53

healthy meals. We no longer want

10:56

to eat normal food. We want to eat highly

10:59

palatable food, high sugar food,

11:01

high fat food, and for some of us, high

11:03

salt food. And we call this comfort food

11:05

because it is biologically

11:08

comforting to the body

11:10

and brain.

11:11

Ah comfort food, I could honestly

11:13

spend a whole episode in this series talking about

11:15

this happiness challenge. When my Yale

11:17

students disappeared during lockdown, I

11:20

comforted myself with whatever sugary food

11:22

looked good. I wound up putting on the so

11:24

called COVID nineteen pounds and then some

11:27

But Alyssa says, this wasn't a willpower

11:29

failure. It was just my basic biology

11:31

at work. Take one experiment in

11:34

which researchers stressed out a bunch of rats

11:36

and then gave them access not just to their

11:38

usual meals but also to human

11:40

junk food like cookies and candy. The

11:43

rats switched over to the fatty stuff, but

11:45

they also changed their approach to feeding time.

11:48

The addition of stress

11:50

on top of giving rats access

11:53

to oreos creates this

11:56

craving an addiction in these rats.

11:58

So each time they get access to the

12:00

oreos, they're not just eating leisurely

12:02

and saying, what a fine meal, this feels great.

12:05

They're binge eating. They will eat

12:07

more, and they'll develop greater or

12:09

intro abdominal fat, and that is just

12:11

a little disease making machine.

12:13

To have a lot of introbdominal fat means that

12:15

We're also having a lot of lipids

12:17

and our blood and insulin resistance. So

12:21

stress plus comfort food means

12:23

we're becoming more apple shaped in our body.

12:25

But chronic stress doesn't just change the size

12:27

of our mid sections, as my own heightened

12:30

CRP marker show, it can also affect

12:32

our immune systems.

12:33

Our immune cells have receptors for

12:36

cortisol, but when we're chronically

12:38

stressed and cortisol gets

12:41

too high, then the immune

12:43

cells are not turning off inflammation

12:46

in response to cortisol, and those

12:48

cells are more prone flammatory during

12:51

stress.

12:52

Chronic stress results in exactly the same inflammation

12:54

profile that I presented with at my doctor's

12:57

visit. What researchers are referring

12:59

to as inflammating chronic

13:02

stress also damages our DNA. It

13:04

destroys the part of our chromosomes that we need

13:06

for cell division.

13:07

What are known as teeling telomeres

13:10

are these caps at the tips of our chromosomes

13:14

and they protect our genes,

13:16

so they have this incredibly important role

13:18

in the cell. Telomeres are basically

13:20

the sentinels or these guards, and when

13:22

there's too much stress in the cell,

13:25

the telomeres tend to shorten

13:27

quickly. And more excessively.

13:30

Telomeres work like the plastic tip at the

13:32

top of our shoelaces, which the Internet

13:34

tells me is actually called an ag lit. Did

13:37

not know that. In any case, if you've

13:39

ever had a shoelace lose it zag lit, you

13:42

know what happens next. The lease starts

13:44

to fray and fall apart. Telomeres

13:46

at the top of a DNA strand work the same

13:49

way. When they get messed up, our

13:51

DNA winds up frayed and broken.

13:53

And once they get too short, they start

13:55

sending out distress signals saying

13:58

this cell is no longer good. We

14:00

got to call it quits. Time for this cell to

14:02

become senescent.

14:04

Dyeing sinescent cells, higher abdominal

14:07

fat levels, long standing anxiety,

14:09

irritability, inflammating, and

14:11

an increased risk for premature death. Apparently

14:15

this is where all my self imposed pressures over

14:17

the last few years have gotten me. At

14:19

this point in my conversation with Alyssa, things

14:21

were starting to sound kind of hopeless, but

14:23

Alyssa assured me that chronic stress doesn't

14:26

have to be a cellular death sentence. In

14:28

fact, her newest research has shown that healthier

14:31

stress responses are possible even

14:34

in a population that experiences some of

14:36

the hardest possible stressors.

14:38

We've learned more about chroduct stress from

14:40

these caregiving studies than other types

14:42

of stressors.

14:43

But what lessons can we learn from the painful

14:45

experience of stressed out caregivers. We'll

14:48

find out when the Happiness Lab returns from

14:50

the break.

14:59

When you were a caregiver, beautiful responsibility

15:01

to be more than a human being, you just

15:04

do.

15:04

When his father Stanley became ill, movie

15:06

star Steve Guttenberg was forced to trade

15:08

the glamor of Hollywood for the hard job

15:11

of a long term caretaker.

15:12

You have to be superhuman because

15:14

it takes a superhuman to clean somebody

15:17

up when they go to

15:19

the bathroom, when they

15:21

throw up, when they

15:23

have a seizure, when

15:25

they have bouts of true

15:27

darkness. You

15:30

have to be more than an average

15:32

human being.

15:33

Step and his sister joined the thirty four million

15:36

other Americans offering unpaid care

15:38

to an older person in need.

15:40

I would call them angels,

15:42

super angels, muscular,

15:45

strong, super powered

15:47

angels, because when you're looking

15:49

at somebody at two in the morning and they have to go to

15:51

the bathroom and you have to pick

15:53

them up out of bed and

15:56

they can't make it to the regular bathroom, and you have to

15:58

put them on their commode,

16:01

and you have to give them their privacy and

16:05

their dignity at the same time

16:07

being there to help them. You're

16:10

not a human being, You're way

16:12

above a human being, because

16:14

the average human being walks out of the

16:16

room. Can't do it, cannot

16:19

do it. Now, I'm not going to tell you that I didn't

16:21

have my moments of gagging and

16:26

dry eaving, because

16:29

some of it was really hard to watch. And I

16:31

feel my metal coming

16:33

up in me when I'm talking about this, because

16:36

you have to be made of metal to

16:39

deal with this.

16:41

The range of daily challenges that carers face

16:43

is immense medical bills,

16:45

dealing with hospitals and insurance companies,

16:48

negotiating time off work, and

16:50

that doesn't include the heartbreaking pain of

16:52

watching once healthy loved ones deteriorate.

16:55

The reason I wrote the book is caregiving

16:57

is a really lonely occupation.

17:00

You're basically sitting in the room with that one

17:02

person who's very ill, and

17:05

you're looking at them constantly,

17:08

monitoring their health well and seeing

17:10

what you can do for them, and at the same

17:12

time, you're trying to figure out your

17:14

own life and what you're doing with it

17:17

and what you have to give

17:19

up to be part of

17:23

this process.

17:24

The problems caregivers contend with can

17:27

last day after day after day, and

17:29

as doctor Elyssa Epple explained earlier,

17:32

such sustained stress can be really bad

17:34

for our bodies. Melissa likes to

17:36

point to one caregiver study in particular.

17:38

Showing that their wounds

17:41

heal almost ten days longer

17:44

than low stress age

17:46

matched older controls, And

17:48

that really is about the chronic

17:50

stress response, the excesses

17:52

of the exposure to cortisol.

17:54

It wouldn't be surprising if Steve Gutenberg's

17:56

cortisol levels were through the roof during his

17:58

time as a caregiver. Steve was

18:00

living in LA when his father was diagnosed

18:02

with renal failure, so taking care

18:04

of him meant regular drives to his father's

18:07

house in Arizona mile.

18:09

Round trip every week. And I started

18:11

listening to podcasts or music, but

18:14

quickly I stopped and just started thinking.

18:17

So what I would think about was

18:19

when my dad was younger, and my

18:21

dad was really fit and young

18:24

and healthy and enthusiastic,

18:27

sitting.

18:27

Behind the wheel for long hours isn't ideal,

18:30

but ruminating about his father's physical

18:32

decline during those long drives was bound

18:34

to trigger even more stress.

18:36

My dad was in such pain, physical

18:39

pain, mental pain, he did not want

18:42

to die.

18:44

Steve says his father's final years were

18:46

the most depressing period of his entire

18:48

life. And Steve's not alone. It's

18:51

estimated that half of caregivers have major

18:54

depression, a rate that's twice

18:56

as high as the general population. Even

18:58

more shockingly, twelve percent of dementia

19:01

caregivers die before their sick loved.

19:03

One one study estimated that

19:05

a caregiver's mortality risk was sixty

19:07

three percent higher than they're not caregiving peers.

19:10

With stats like these, it's probably not

19:12

surprising that many caregivers like Steve

19:15

wind up neglecting their own self care.

19:17

It fell by the wayside. I

19:19

did not exercise for so many years.

19:22

I didn't sleep very well at all. There

19:25

was about a month before

19:27

he passed where he would be up all night,

19:31

that he would be screaming

19:34

all night. So my self

19:36

care did go to the side.

19:39

But researcher Alyssa Apple has found that not

19:41

all caregivers succumbed to the effects of stress.

19:44

The good news is that there

19:46

are ways to

19:48

be with this life

19:51

situation.

19:52

Alissa studied caregivers telomeres, that

19:54

part of our DNA that gets prematurely shortened

19:57

by chronic stress. She found

19:59

that many of her subjects telomeres were badly

20:01

affected. They showed all the expected

20:03

hallmarks of inflammating, but

20:05

the telomeres of some caregivers were fine.

20:08

Even though the these people face the same stresses

20:10

as those with the shortened tail of mirrors, their bodies

20:13

weren't affected in the same way. How

20:15

is that possible? Alyssa discovered

20:17

that one factor was the narrative these caregivers

20:20

created to explain the difficulties they were facing.

20:23

The healthier caregivers embraced what's known

20:25

as radical acceptance.

20:27

I don't control outcomes. I don't

20:29

control the disease course. I don't control

20:31

someone else's behavior. I can

20:34

control X and Y. So really

20:36

separating out a situation to

20:38

understand there is a little bit

20:41

that we can control. We can control our response,

20:43

and we can do things to show

20:45

compassion, to be with

20:47

someone with a loving presence, spend

20:50

our time with them showing that we care. There

20:52

are ways that we can be

20:55

our best self in these uncontrollable

20:57

situations that allow

20:59

us to not be in

21:01

this chronically stressed

21:03

state of striving, of

21:06

hitting a brick wall.

21:07

If you're a caregiver, you might be saying, well,

21:09

that's easier said than done. Radical

21:12

acceptance was definitely something Steve

21:14

Gutenberg struggled with.

21:16

I was reluctant to accept the reality

21:18

of the situation. I just couldn't accept

21:20

it. I wouldn't accept it. Everyone

21:22

else knew my dad was dying. I

21:25

knew it, but wouldn't accept it, so I never talked

21:27

about it. I always said, he's going to get better,

21:29

He's going to come through this, even at the very end.

21:32

Alyssa shared one strategy we can use

21:34

to bring a healthier narrative to times of stress.

21:37

We can try out what's known as expressive

21:39

writing. Take time to journal about

21:41

all the crap on your plate and how

21:43

it makes you feel.

21:45

I suggest just starting off with a

21:48

massive list without any editing

21:51

or censoring, just writing down everything

21:54

that you feel bothered by, worried

21:56

by, pressured by, and

21:59

then thinking about your day. You know what stresses

22:01

you out most during the day. We often

22:04

don't give ourselves the opportunity to step

22:06

back and reflect on the

22:08

level that we're carrying.

22:10

The act of putting all your stresses down on paper

22:13

can also reveal all the things you're doing that

22:15

inadvertently add to your stress levels.

22:17

We're very routine animals, you know. We get

22:19

into this I'll call it a daily

22:21

stress routine, and we can

22:24

break that routine. We can see where

22:26

we're creating unnecessary stress.

22:29

You can then take stock of all the neglected stuff

22:31

you can control about your situation practices

22:34

like sleep, or food or time with friends.

22:37

You can also take some time to count your blessings.

22:39

Gratitude, it turns out, is a powerful tool

22:42

for tackling stress. Fortunately,

22:44

this was a practice that did come naturally for

22:46

caregivers. Steve Gutenberg his dad

22:49

was a gratitude role model.

22:50

Oh yeah, my dad was grateful for

22:52

anything. Had told

22:54

get a cup of coffee. H coffee.

22:58

My dad taught me, you know, Stephen,

23:01

enjoy your life. Enjoy

23:03

your life. Be

23:06

happy. That's it. Just

23:08

be happy. Everything else

23:11

will come.

23:12

Steve called his book a Time to Think,

23:14

because in spite of his father's difficult illness,

23:17

he still managed to remember all the many

23:19

ways in which he was fortunate.

23:21

Thank god I have a job that

23:23

I could stop and just sit

23:26

there with my dad all the time. How

23:28

lucky I was that I

23:30

didn't have to be in some office hearing

23:32

about my dad on the telephone.

23:34

Steve hated seeing Stanley's physical decline,

23:37

but the time Steve spent with his dad in those

23:39

final months allowed him to remember

23:41

the dead of gratitude. He owed the old man.

23:44

I think gratitude it's a verb. I

23:47

think like love is a verb. You

23:50

know. My dad used to say to me, you could either

23:52

love someone or you can love someone

23:55

and show up. You know. That's that's

23:57

gratitude. That's gratitude.

23:59

That's the deep part of gratitude.

24:01

Research shows that strategies like gratitude

24:03

and radical acceptance can protect us

24:05

from the negative effects of chronic stress.

24:08

But as I read through a list is work, I learned

24:10

one additional way to handle stress that sounded

24:12

kind of odd. It turns out we

24:14

can fight stress by looking for new chances

24:17

to get stressed out. This is the insight

24:19

behind what effective scientists call hermetic

24:22

stress.

24:23

Her Medic stress is absolutely

24:25

fascinating because it's so counterintuitive.

24:28

We know very well from

24:31

fly studies that organisms

24:34

like a little shock of moderate

24:37

repeated stress, and in fact

24:39

it's strengthening. It's like a vaccination,

24:42

so it really is building up biological

24:45

resistance. It's exercise for our

24:47

nervous system.

24:48

What you're looking to create is a short episode

24:50

of stress, something that will get your heart

24:52

racing and blood pumping, but also

24:55

an episode that you can stop so

24:57

you can train your autonomic nervous system to

24:59

go back into recovery mode. And

25:01

it doesn't have to involve finding true fight

25:03

or flight danger. Hermetic stress

25:05

can be way easier than that.

25:07

The best example, of course, is extra and

25:09

we know exercise is good for our health, but

25:11

we haven't thought about the fact that short

25:14

bursts of exercise are creating that

25:16

positive hormetic stress response.

25:18

One study found that caretakers who were asked

25:20

to exercise three to five times a week showed

25:23

less short in telomeres than those who didn't

25:25

move their bodies. The blast of stress

25:27

that comes from exercise seems to slow

25:29

down and possibly even reverse the

25:32

effects of inflammating Exercise

25:34

was another strategy that came easily to the Gutenberg

25:37

family. When Steve's great grandfather

25:39

first came to the US, his physical fitness

25:41

came in handy.

25:42

What he would do for extra money is he would go down to the

25:44

Brooklyn Bridge and he feats of strength.

25:47

He would carry people on his dock.

25:49

He would carry huge weights and

25:51

at the end he had a Shetland pony and

25:53

he would pick up this little Shetland party walk around

25:55

it.

25:56

Steve's grandfather was a powerlifter who

25:58

then passed on the jim bug to his son Stanley.

26:00

My dad started lifting weights when he

26:03

was twelve years old. My dad

26:05

was a handstand king. My dad

26:07

could do a handstand for by four straight.

26:10

As a skinny teen, Steve turned to his dad

26:12

for exercise tips. Under Stanley's

26:14

tutelage, Steve was able to put on fifty

26:17

pounds of muscle. I'm building a

26:19

mean, lean monster, his dad had announced

26:21

proudly. But like many stressed

26:23

out folks, Steve let his usual exercise

26:25

routine slide at exactly the time

26:27

he needed it most. As Steve

26:29

explained just how infrequently he hit the gym

26:32

during his time as a caretaker, I felt

26:34

a bit called out. I mean I

26:36

rarely make my yoga classes or hit

26:38

the elliptical. What I'm feeling frantic, but

26:41

Ironically, a jolt of hermetic stress was

26:43

probably the perfect remedy for the strain I

26:45

was under. But giving our bodies additional

26:48

bursts of stress to fight stress isn't

26:50

even the most surprising way we can protect ourselves

26:52

from chronic overwhelm. We also

26:55

need to train our brains to think differently

26:57

about stress. I'll explain

26:59

more when the happiness Lab returns after

27:01

the break. What

27:08

someone says they're feeling stressed, we usually

27:10

assume that they're having a bad time. My

27:13

own periods of stress are accompanied by yucky

27:15

feelings like irritability, interrupted

27:17

sleep, digestive issues, and a sort

27:19

of forehead clenching. Feeling

27:21

stressed sucks, and I usually

27:24

just wish that I could avoid it.

27:25

Your heart is facing your pomps or sweaty or butterflies

27:28

in your stomach, so of course, in that circumstance,

27:30

it feels like self evidence the stress is bad.

27:33

Right, This is ut Austin psychologist

27:35

David Yeager.

27:36

Your stress could be viewed in a

27:38

debilitating way that it's a

27:41

sign your body is preparing for damage and defeat.

27:43

Who wants damage and defeat? Seems

27:45

like we're all agreed. Then stress sucks.

27:48

But David says that's not the whole story.

27:51

There are lots of times when we face a stressor

27:54

and we're thrilled and excited, and

27:56

that energy allows us to show what

27:58

we know. I mean, if you talk to great athletes, right, they

28:00

talk about performing at the level of your preparation,

28:03

and one of the ways they do that is they kind of get in a zone

28:05

in their heads and they're like amped up before

28:08

a performance, right. And so in

28:10

those cases, that's a much better situation to

28:12

be in than to have no stress at all, where you're

28:14

like about to fall asleep.

28:15

David is an expert on the power of mindsets,

28:18

the beliefs we have about things like our abilities

28:20

and how our brains respond to challenges. David's

28:23

work has shown that how we think about things

28:25

has a huge impact on how we behave His

28:28

early research focused on what's known as

28:30

the growth mindset, the belief that

28:32

our abilities and talents can improve over time

28:35

if we're willing to put in some work in practice.

28:37

But these days David has started thinking about

28:40

a different type of mindset, the beliefs

28:42

we have about the effects of stress.

28:44

If we think about stress is terrible, we

28:47

may behave in ways that lead us to suffer. But

28:49

if we greet stress as a potential friend,

28:51

couldn't improve our lives. Researchers

28:54

have begun conducting some elegant laboratory

28:56

experiments to test this possibility. But

28:59

David's favorite illustration of the importance of

29:01

our stress mindset occurred when he was

29:03

on vacation with his daughters.

29:04

Scarlet, we when water

29:07

skiing in Wisconsin, and she'd never keep She's

29:09

a fourth or fifth grader, and She's sitting there

29:11

bobbing in the lake and I'm holding

29:13

the back of her skis and she says,

29:16

Daddy, I'm so nervous. I have butterflies on my stomach.

29:18

I don't think I can do this. And

29:20

I was like, well, Scarlet, you know that

29:23

that's stress and that energy that's just getting

29:25

oxygenated blood to your muscles and your brain,

29:27

and those muscles with that oxygenated

29:30

blood are going to be stronger. You can hold onto

29:32

the rope a little more, and once you do that, you're

29:34

gonna pop up and just have the most fun of your life and it's

29:36

gonna be thrilling. And what

29:38

I was doing was just giving

29:40

her a different way of appraising or making meaning

29:43

out of that bodily experience. She's

29:45

like, okay, and she got

29:47

right up and I just stayed there bobbing in the water

29:49

for I don't know, twenty minutes. Well, she just did laughs

29:51

around this lake in Wisconsin.

29:53

Justice Scarlet initially interpreted her stress

29:55

response as a signal that she shouldn't

29:57

try water skiing. David says that many

30:00

of us greet the early signs of stress the wrong

30:02

way.

30:03

In general and society, people tend to have a stress

30:05

is debilitating mindset. You see that

30:07

if you just google image s, stress

30:10

and well being memes, they all take this

30:12

assumption that stress is always bad and should

30:14

be avoided. Right. It's like depleting

30:16

you. It is something that you need to

30:18

suppress. Most people are convinced there's

30:20

only one way to look at stress, which is that it's always bad,

30:22

and when they do that, it spirals on itself

30:25

and it becomes self confirming for them. But

30:27

we know from just basic science

30:29

of stress in both animals and humans that

30:31

the stress response is simply there to keep us

30:33

alive, to overcome and meet the demands

30:36

that are imposed on us. And so there's

30:38

a different kind of mindset or belief you can have

30:40

about stress, which is the stress can be enhancing

30:42

mindset.

30:43

Stanford psychologist Alia Crumb was

30:45

the first to show the harmful effects of the wrong

30:47

stress mindset. She found that people

30:50

who expected stress to be debilitating experienced

30:52

more anxiety and lower happiness ratings

30:55

than people who thought stress was enhancing. The

30:57

people she studied who believed that stress was good

30:59

for them also showed more optimism,

31:02

better performance at work, and even better physical

31:04

health. Crumb's work showed it's

31:06

not our stress that seems to be hurting us, it's

31:08

how we think about it, which got David

31:10

wondering could people shift from one

31:13

stress mindset to the other, just as

31:15

he did with Scarlet at the Lake? Could David encourage

31:17

people to reframe how they saw stress.

31:20

Could you just tell

31:22

people what their physiology means

31:25

one way or the other and could that change their

31:27

performance when they're in a stressful situation.

31:30

David and a colleague, Jeremy Jamison, recruited

31:32

college students planning to take the Jerry Exam

31:35

and presented them with a practice version of the test.

31:38

Everyone was reminded that it's normal for people

31:40

to feel stressed out before an exam. Behalf

31:43

of participants were given a list of reasons

31:45

why their stress response might improve their performance.

31:48

You know, the bodies releasing catecola means and those catacola

31:50

means are going to enhance performance. And the

31:52

reason your heart is pumping so much is because it's

31:54

getting more blood to your brain and to your muscles.

31:56

It's going to help you perform better.

31:58

The results were striking. Students who

32:00

reappraised their stress response as beneficial

32:02

showed way better scores than those in the control

32:05

condition. On some parts of the exam,

32:07

their scores were more than one hundred points higher.

32:10

But the interesting thing is that a month later students

32:12

went and took the real gre and brought their scores

32:14

back, and they did much better. The difference

32:17

is like the difference between getting into a mid

32:19

tier top fifty graduate program or a top five

32:21

graduate program.

32:22

But GIRE exams are acute stressors.

32:25

David wanted to know whether the same mindset shift

32:27

could also reduce the chronic stress that

32:29

dogs people like me day after day. So

32:32

he turned to a group of high school students from

32:34

low income backgrounds.

32:36

And these are almost exclusively black or Latino students

32:38

whose parents had not gone to college. And we explicitly

32:41

wanted to choose this situation because

32:43

we know kids experienced lots of stressors.

32:46

They might experience racial discrimination, prejudice,

32:49

but also for kids whose parents are experiencing

32:51

poverty, food and security, things like that, So

32:54

could a little mindset shift have

32:56

an impact in that kind of population.

32:58

David's students watched a thirty minute video that

33:01

explained both the importance of a growth mindset

33:03

and why stress can have beneficial effects

33:06

on performance. Would this be enough

33:08

to change how they great stress? Would

33:10

the video help students react better to the annoying

33:12

challenges of everyday life.

33:14

So, over the course of the first semester of high school

33:16

kids completed daily diary surveys

33:18

three times a day, provided cortisol samples

33:21

several times per day, And what we find

33:23

is that on days in which kids say, yeah,

33:25

this is a really stressful day, like I'm

33:27

feeling judged and evaluated by my teachers, I'm feeling

33:29

left out by my friends, kids were saying

33:32

I can handle this, I'm feeling good about

33:34

myself, I feel positive. So it's

33:36

by definition stress resilience. And

33:39

then what we see also is just lower cortisol

33:41

levels almost across the board and That's significant

33:43

because the body produces cortisol in part

33:45

when the mind expects damaged tissue,

33:47

and so if you are expecting defeat,

33:50

then you see increase in cortisol. But if

33:52

you're expecting to do well to take

33:54

on the challenge, then you should see less cortisol. And

33:56

that's what we see over the rest of

33:58

the semester.

34:00

This is an amazing finding. By

34:02

merely thinking of stress not as a prelude

34:04

to damage and defeat, but is something helpful

34:06

and useful, You can prevent your boy

34:09

from chronically releasing the very substances

34:12

that cause the inflammating effects usually

34:14

experienced by stressed out people like me. That

34:17

is really cool, But there is

34:19

a trick to getting the benefits of the right stress

34:21

mindset. You need to practice long

34:23

term. You need to carry over that

34:25

positive mindset from one situation to the

34:27

next. So if you train yourself to appreciate

34:29

exam stress, you need to return to that

34:31

same positive mindset when your car breaks down,

34:34

or when you lose your wallet, or when you face a tough

34:36

meeting at work. Again, David's

34:38

daughter Scarlet is there to show us the way. Remember

34:41

the mindset pep talk David gave Scarlet

34:43

before she went water skiing.

34:45

Fast forward two years later and she's getting in

34:47

the car on the way to a cello audition. She's

34:50

like, Daddy, I'm so nervous, Like I don't

34:52

know if I can do well in this. I was like, Scarlett, you know what I'm

34:54

going to say. She's like, yeah, you're going to say

34:56

that. The butterflies on my stomach are there just

34:58

to pump, you know, good energy through my body

35:00

and give me adrenaline and oxygen et cetera, et cetera.

35:02

I was like, how did you know that? She's

35:05

like, oh, you total to me two years ago whenever we're

35:07

skiing. And so what I love about

35:09

that is, first of all, it's proof that at least

35:11

once in my life, my kids listen to me, which is not

35:14

always happening. But second of all, she's

35:16

transferring some appraisal

35:19

about her stress to a totally different situation

35:22

years later. And I think about that a lot. With our

35:24

interventions, we're often like giving

35:27

you a different mindset right before

35:29

you need it, and there's some stressful situation,

35:31

and then you kind of see that it works for

35:34

you, and then you carry

35:36

that new mindset with you and apply it

35:38

to new situations, and I knew

35:40

that from our research, but I'd never seen that firsthand

35:42

until the scarlet situation happened.

35:46

Making this episode has made me realize that I'm

35:49

way too negative about stress. I can

35:51

remember lots of times in my own life when

35:53

small bursts of stress have felt good. That

35:56

rush I get before a big talk, or

35:58

that push I experienced during a tough yoga

36:00

session. The adrenaline I experience

36:02

in those moments doesn't feel stressful or debilitating.

36:05

It feels exciting. A reaction's

36:07

going to help me perform better. I

36:10

need to harness that and apply it across

36:12

other situations in life. Our

36:14

daily stressors probably aren't going away anytime

36:16

soon, but that doesn't mean we're stuck experiencing

36:19

the negative health and happiness effects of chronic

36:21

stress. We can examine our feelings

36:24

and create a narrative that lets us accept the

36:26

things we're not able to control, while

36:28

at the same time trying to control the stuff

36:30

that will help us improve our lives. All

36:32

those self care essentials like sleep, exercise,

36:35

diet, and social interaction, and

36:37

like Steve Gutenberg, we can work to greet

36:39

tough times with gratitude and seize

36:42

the opportunity to notice the blessings

36:44

in life. With strategies like these,

36:46

I'm hopeful that my inflammation markers

36:48

will be a bit lower at my next annual checkup,

36:51

and that my doctor will have fewer opportunities

36:53

to mock me for not practicing what I preach.

36:56

But there are still plenty of other happiness challenges

36:59

that I still mess up. So join me

37:01

next time as I learn some new strategies

37:03

for being nicer to my future self, ones

37:06

that involve a trip down memory lane and

37:08

through a ton I realized my

37:10

skin would look so bad. That's

37:13

really disturbing all

37:15

that next week on the Happiness Lab with me

37:18

Doctor Laurie Santos