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Odoo, modern management made

1:01

simple. Hey listeners, to celebrate

1:04

our new book, A Point of Beauty,

1:06

True Stories of Holding On and Letting

1:08

Go, which is out on March 19th,

1:10

we've designed a beautiful metal cut bookmark.

1:13

To claim your bookmark, pre-order A Point of

1:15

Beauty and visit the moth.org/pre-order bonus to show

1:18

your proof of purchase. We can't wait for

1:20

you to read the 50 true stories in

1:22

this book and know this bookmark will make

1:24

sure you never miss a page. Claim

1:27

your bookmark while supplies last

1:30

at the moth.org/pre-order bonus now.

1:36

Welcome to the Moth Podcast. I'm

1:39

Teak Milan, writer, journalist, leadership coach,

1:41

moth storyteller, and your

1:43

host for this episode. We're

1:45

celebrating the launch of our brand new book, A

1:47

Point of Beauty, True Stories of Holding On and

1:50

Letting Go. Now you're listening to

1:52

the Moth Podcast, so I know you love hearing

1:54

the moth, But reading the Moth

1:56

is an entirely different way to experience

1:58

these true personal stories. Plus,

2:01

it's much harder to give a podcast

2:03

his last minute give for your partner's

2:05

birthday or graduation. Mother's Day. Father's Day

2:07

is coming! Up. Just sayin. and the

2:09

most new book might include a story

2:11

for the Percy Listening to. Like Now

2:13

actually there's no might about it. You

2:15

can read a story from me in

2:18

the book for good. It's more about

2:20

what makes this book special. Weiss definitely

2:22

pick it up wherever books are sold.

2:24

A want to share was the much

2:26

love stories that appears in a point

2:28

of beauty. This was some strong Leonardo

2:30

and he told this out of Boston.

2:33

Main stage with some of the night

2:35

was small Susana live. In

2:44

two thousand and ten, I'm

2:46

standing in this grimy little

2:48

gym and will have to

2:51

Mexico finally watching. Landlords are

2:53

neighbors. And

2:55

now for those of you that don't know

2:57

what that is, Loot Shot is the arts

3:00

of Mexican Wrestling. The

3:02

pageantry and acrobatics or seconds and

3:05

none. And while the story

3:07

lines narratives of good versus evil

3:09

would feel familiar to you, there's

3:11

a special match to law

3:13

suits, because in Mexican culture, it

3:16

is sick. Now.

3:20

I've always had a fascination with love

3:23

New Driver says watching it on the

3:25

T V with my dad. And

3:29

it's always been so spectacular, but

3:31

those warriors were so far, it's

3:33

it in their master for a

3:35

dollar flipping every which. But.

3:39

I would learn later that

3:41

those same warriors were your

3:43

everyday teachers. Taxi.

3:46

Drivers, office workers,

3:49

But. In the Ring. When.

3:52

That masks came on. They were

3:54

guy. And.

3:58

As a scrawny kids. Some

4:00

in significant neighborhood in Queens,

4:02

New York City. I

4:05

wanted a feel that. I

4:08

wanted to know. Would admit to

4:10

be a hero. As

4:13

so now standing there I was

4:15

incomplete. Ah, So much so

4:18

that I wait for hours after the

4:20

event just to approach a promoter and

4:22

asked. If. I may start

4:24

training with the local tournaments. Now

4:29

to employ things to know. I'm

4:32

not Mexican. Yes

4:37

I'm latino good at think. Maybe

4:42

more pointedly? at the time

4:45

I had a zero wrestling

4:47

experience. But. I

4:49

may have saved just a little bit until the

4:51

promoter that I was a wrestler back home in

4:54

the United States. Whatever

4:56

was, he goes backstage, comes back with

4:58

a little piece of paper with an

5:00

address scribbled all over it says. Show.

5:03

Up here Friday. He

5:06

didn't say way. To

5:09

show p a product. So why did

5:11

but old quest Five hours too early.

5:15

But. I waited. and I waded.

5:18

Than. After a while. Incomes.

5:22

The. Trainer. And. It

5:25

is. These legendary

5:27

for the Eagles season medals

5:29

from Natural Libra same. I

5:33

lose it. And

5:36

he comes up to me silently. Size.

5:39

Meal and in the white his voice goes,

5:41

hop in the ring. And

5:44

the ring the ring as

5:47

an iron frame with plywood

5:49

on top, some sprinkling of

5:51

roberts and an old wine

5:53

or billboards securing it. Sounds

5:55

not a bouncy things all

5:57

or imagine it's. The

6:02

wrestlers were

6:05

amateurs twice my size and

6:08

everything I did was

6:10

clumsy and tense and

6:13

so they saw that and decided

6:15

to deliver the punishment just to see

6:17

if I would come back the next

6:19

day. And so the

6:21

slaps to the chest started stinging that

6:24

much more, the body slams a little

6:26

more vicious and the blows, the falls

6:28

or bumps as we call it in

6:30

wrestling that much more aggressive for me

6:33

than anyone else in the ring. But

6:37

I came back and

6:40

I kept coming back because where I'm

6:42

from giving up is not in the

6:44

cards and

6:46

after three months of training

6:48

I'm finally granted my first

6:51

match and

6:53

because of my hard work and

6:56

likely the novelty of an

6:58

American luchador I

7:01

am slated in as the sub main

7:03

event. Now to be clear that

7:06

is not the main event. I'm

7:09

still the warm up act. And

7:13

the night comes and it's the

7:15

same rickety ring and some makeshift

7:17

arena with folding

7:19

chairs but the

7:21

lights and the mariachi music

7:25

is blaring and it feels

7:27

glorious and

7:31

they call out my name and

7:34

all the blood rushes right out of

7:36

my body. It all

7:38

becomes a blur. But

7:41

I pull myself together, I get pumped

7:43

and I step out in

7:46

all white and gold. The

7:48

night in shining armor with

7:50

a 14 foot velvet cape.

7:56

I hit that ring and I'm looking

7:59

good. And

8:01

then I get my ass kicked. I

8:06

lose that match bad. And

8:09

so I go backstage, beaten, battered,

8:12

but at least it's all over.

8:14

And Rico Cisneros, the trainer, comes over

8:17

and says, go back in the ring,

8:21

get the crowd pumping and go save

8:23

the good guys. I

8:25

said, what the hell are you talking about? But

8:28

I panic, I run out there, I do

8:31

what I'm told only to get

8:33

annihilated again. By

8:35

the end of the event, there are

8:37

three bad guys, rudos as we call them,

8:40

one pinning my shoulders down onto

8:42

the mat, the other kicking me

8:44

repeatedly, and the third unmasks me.

8:48

The ultimate embarrassment in

8:51

Mexican wrestling. And

8:54

so I leave with a mixture

8:56

of emotions. I'm

8:59

embarrassed, I'm defeated. But

9:02

despite the beating, I feel like

9:04

I achieved something amazing.

9:07

I had become a Mexican wrestler for

9:09

Christ's sake. I

9:12

had lived out a childhood fantasy,

9:16

but I decided enough

9:18

fun, the adventure was over, time to

9:20

go home. So

9:23

I'm back in my little ass appointment in

9:25

Queens when I get a

9:27

phone call a month later from

9:29

a promoter asking me if I would

9:31

consider wrestling the welterweight champion of the

9:34

world. So

9:36

it seems this American Luchas had caused quite

9:39

a stir and audiences were still talking about

9:41

this guy. So it was meant

9:43

to be set as a special

9:45

event for the 75th anniversary of

9:48

the largest Mexican wrestling promotion in

9:50

the world and

9:53

staged at the National Museum

9:55

of Mexico City, which is

9:57

literally a palace. How

10:02

could I say no? I'm

10:05

terrified, but I had to

10:07

see how far I could take this thing, so

10:09

I accept. My

10:12

opponent, the welterweight champion of the world, his

10:15

name was Sangre

10:17

Azteca. Aztec

10:20

in blood. I

10:24

failed to mention that my wrestling

10:26

name was El Conquistador. The

10:31

Conqueror. Now

10:33

for anyone here that

10:36

recalls their colonial history, the

10:39

conquerors didn't do such nice things in Mexico.

10:42

It was a match made in heaven. The

10:46

storyline was set. But

10:50

upon touching ground in

10:52

Mexico, I'm explicitly told

10:54

there is no way I'm winning

10:56

this match. And

10:59

then I'm told that Sangre

11:02

Azteca refuses to choreograph

11:04

the match. Now

11:07

if you know anything about wrestling, you

11:09

know that the outcomes, yes, are predetermined,

11:11

but that also the matches are more

11:14

or less scripted. So

11:18

now not only am I being forced

11:20

to lose the match, I

11:22

could get really hurt. This

11:25

has gone too far. Ironically,

11:33

I'm billed as the good guy. Or

11:36

technical as we call it in Mexican wrestling.

11:41

But when the announcer

11:44

finally calls out, El

11:48

Conquistador, that's where

11:50

my heart and the entire

11:53

audience turns on me. Now

11:57

Mexican wrestling is a familial affair, so there was no way I could

11:59

win this match. as the grandmothers, everyone

12:01

down to the kids, start cursing at

12:03

me. I feel

12:05

like the entire arena wants to

12:08

see me massacred. And

12:11

in front of over a thousand

12:13

audience members, Sangres, Decca, and I

12:15

go mano a mano, one

12:18

on one. Two out

12:20

of three falls for more than 45 minutes.

12:25

And we go at it. We're

12:28

going blow for below, putting each other's

12:30

submission moves. We're fighting on the outside

12:32

of the ring. We're kicking and we're

12:34

going hard. At one

12:36

point in the match, revved up by the

12:38

insult of the audience, I looked down on

12:40

my opponent who I just body slammed, and

12:43

I smacked him. This

12:50

was a terrible mistake. All

12:55

of a sudden the chops started stinging

12:58

that much more, the punches and kicks

13:00

a little heavier, and things are going

13:02

a little too far. But

13:05

we go at it, and I stay

13:07

in there. And

13:10

for the climax of the match, I climb

13:12

up to the top rope to finish him

13:14

off with a high flying maneuver. And

13:17

it's just like I imagined as a

13:19

kid. It's magical.

13:24

And I'm soaring through the

13:26

air, only

13:30

to get caught off midair with a

13:32

drop kick to the chest. And

13:36

he pins me for the one, two, three. I

13:39

lose again. And

13:44

I'm leaving the ring, confused,

13:46

beaten, and

13:48

a swarm of kids surround

13:50

me, asking

13:53

me for autographs, embracing me, taking

13:56

photos, and it's bizarre.

14:00

And I bend down to greet a few kids

14:02

and I feel this little pat on my shoulder

14:05

and a little boy says in my ear sisepuete

14:11

Yes, you can And

14:14

I'm beaten and

14:17

this kid wants to believe Wants

14:21

to believe that this character

14:23

should keep fighting And

14:27

So I do I

14:29

take that childhood fantasy and turn it into

14:32

an eight-year career as el conquisador Now

14:46

it's been almost

14:48

ten years since the last time I stepped in

14:50

the ring But

14:53

of course I think about my adventures as

14:55

a lucha ador all the time But

15:00

more than anything I think about

15:03

that little boy's words Because

15:07

when times get most difficult for me

15:09

and These

15:11

last two years have been some of

15:13

the most challenging tragic years of my

15:15

life of so many of our lives

15:20

El conquisador reminds me That

15:23

it's not always about winning It's

15:27

not about being the hero all the time It's

15:32

about moving through the failures

15:34

and getting up after the losses Because

15:41

as that little kid said that

15:44

kid that just wanted to believe sisepuete

15:51

Yes, you can yes We can.

16:07

What was on the another? Sign

16:09

is a Britain based artist and Queens New York.

16:12

His work has been featured at the

16:14

Guggenheim Museum, The High Line New Museum,

16:16

Mass Smoker, and the Bronx Museum. With

16:18

his first major public are commission premiering

16:20

at Ft are for Freedom State Park

16:22

and Twenty Twenty Two. Son lives

16:25

and works Brooklyn with his wife and

16:27

two daughters. You could fi sad Story

16:29

along with many other favorite moth mainstays

16:31

stories through the years in a new

16:33

book. The Point of Beauty true stories

16:35

of holding on and letting go we

16:37

haven't linked where you the purchase. It

16:39

included in the So. Description.

16:42

Is so cool. That story. Can go from

16:44

a phone mine to the stage to the

16:46

page. And yes, I said phone I saw

16:48

and actually pits us the story. Twenty twenty

16:50

through the moths punch line is a little

16:53

bit of that. A

16:55

day in and day out. I was

16:58

embarrassed, punished physically or psychologically and was

17:00

he were reprimanded for viewing my density.

17:03

But I learned the sanctity of the mascot

17:05

just kept coming back. We

17:07

receive hundreds of the story pitches each

17:10

month. sees another pitch from Money's a

17:12

Nazi, one that's pretty special to the

17:14

book itself. For years

17:16

ago, in December Twenty sixteen, I was sitting

17:18

in my office of the World Bank in

17:20

Washington Dc staring at my computer screen and

17:22

flu quite helpless that a news item popped

17:25

up on my screen. A posting. We said

17:27

that one of the oldest bookshop in Karachi,

17:29

Pangea Brickhouse circa nineteen Forty Five, was about

17:31

to close down. I read the article in

17:33

it the with a photograph of the facade

17:35

of the bookshop. I don't know what happened

17:37

to me, but the photograph really pulls me

17:39

and I said to myself this I can

17:41

do. Money's

17:44

as Macys story also included in the book

17:46

is actually where we get the title of

17:48

Point of Beauty and is so many other

17:51

wonderful stories in the book. Remember

17:53

I said I had a story in

17:55

the book? Well he's a taste. i

17:58

was my mother's fourth daughter And

18:01

when I was 15, I sat my mother down and I

18:03

said, Mommy, I got something to tell you. And

18:05

she said, oh shit. And I said, Mom, I'm gay.

18:09

Now she was shocked, but she became my

18:11

fiercest ally. And when I moved to New York

18:13

City, we talked daily. And

18:15

one day she called me and she said, Teagaboo,

18:17

why you got to be so manish? Why

18:20

can't you be a soft butcher like Ellen DeGeneres? Now

18:24

as a transgender person, what we know is

18:27

that we may lose everybody that we thought

18:29

loved us. And

18:31

I was scared that I was gonna lose her. But

18:34

a few days before I was to have my top surgery,

18:36

I called my mother and I said, Mommy, I

18:39

am having a double mastectomy in chest reconstruction. I'm

18:41

a man. If

18:44

you'd like to read the full story, pick up

18:46

a point of beauty, two stories of holding on

18:48

and letting go wherever you get your books. The

18:51

core of a Moth story, whether it's

18:53

presented on stage, broadcast over the airwaves,

18:56

or is read on the page, the

18:58

core is vulnerability, connection, and beauty, no

19:00

matter how a story is shared. We

19:03

hope you liked the book because we think it's really

19:05

special. Plus, as I mentioned, the Moth

19:07

book makes a thoughtful, gift-free loved ones in

19:09

spring. So much easier than a

19:11

podcast. How would you even wrap a podcast? That's

19:14

it for this episode. From all of

19:17

us here at the Moth, we hope you have a

19:19

story-filled week. One final

19:21

reminder, the Moth's new book, A Point of

19:23

Beauty, True Stories of Holding On and Letting

19:25

Go, is out on March 19th, wherever you

19:27

get your books. We'll have a link to

19:30

where you can purchase it in the show

19:32

description. Cheek Milan has been an

19:34

advocate in the LGBTQ community for over

19:36

a decade. He is also a writer

19:38

and consultant who carved a niche for

19:40

himself as a media advocate and one

19:42

of the leading voices for transgender equality.

19:45

This episode of the Moth Podcast was

19:47

produced by Sarah Austin-Janess, Sarah Jane Johnson,

19:49

and me, Mark Sollinger. The

19:52

rest of the Moth's leadership team

19:54

includes Sarah Haberman, Jennifer Hickson, Meg

19:56

Bowles, Kate Tellers, Marina Cluche, Suzanne

19:58

Rest, Brandon G Grant Walker, Lee-Ann

20:00

Gully, and Aldi Kaza. The Moth would

20:03

like to thank its supporters and listeners.

20:05

Stories like these are made possible by

20:07

community giving. If you're not already a

20:10

member, please consider becoming one or making

20:12

a one-time donation today at themoth.org/give back.

20:15

All Moth stories are true, as remembered by

20:17

the storytellers. For more about

20:19

our podcast, information on pitching your own

20:22

story, and everything else, go to our

20:24

website, themoth.org. The Moth

20:26

podcast is presented by PRX, the

20:28

Public Radio Exchange, helping make

20:30

public radio more public at

20:33

prx.org.