Having faith is the number one priority in your relationship with God. God wants us to have faith that he will provide for our every need, rather than begging God to give us what we think we need.
Being selfish does not always need a negative connotation attached. Being selfish when it counts, can change your mental health. Do what you need to do!
Can you, at the end of the day, look in the mirror and tell yourself that you're proud of yourself? The things that we say to ourselves have a greater impact than anything another person could say.
We often feel the need to know "why?" Having faith and trusting your process does not need an explanation, it's about trusting that everything works together for your good.
In my own experiences, you must give your trust first. People will respect you and do right by you if you grant them your trust, rather than make them earn it. If trust is lost, that is when it must be earned back.
Getting comfortable and accepting the day to day motion of life, will ultimately kill you. Keep pushing for the next thing and going after what will make you become the best you, you can be.
Are you building a team or a family of people that are strong and courageous? Or are you building a group of people that accept failure and play the victim?