0:00

Hey y'all, you know I'm on tour, so

0:02

see if I'm coming to your city, you can click here

0:04

at laylo.com slash sarah

0:06

silverman, L-A-Y-L-O dot

0:09

com slash sarah silverman for tickets.

0:11

Hope to see you there, wherever there is.

0:14

Hey! Hey!

0:20

Hey! Hey, I wanna...

0:23

Hey! Hi! Hey,

0:25

ya fucker!

0:27

Hey! Hey everybody, it's your old

0:29

pal, Sarah. Let's get right

0:31

into some voicemails.

0:35

You left me a message, now

0:37

I'm playing it for the world.

0:42

Let's hear some voicemails.

0:49

Sarah, hello, this is Bethany V.

0:52

Sarah, we've met a few times. In fact, I

0:55

bumped into you while you were hiking

0:57

with Rory and Mary,

0:58

and I approached you awkwardly

1:01

but delicately, because I didn't want to bombard

1:03

you, and I went in for the kill by winning, I went

1:05

in to pet Mary.

1:07

Did not try to kill Mary, I

1:10

went in to pet Mary, you know, and then

1:12

I tried to, you know, again, awkwardly

1:16

express my love and adoration, you

1:20

know, and then it went as you can imagine. You

1:23

were very kind, and God, I love ya. Okay,

1:27

Sarah, I've been doing comedy

1:29

for about 14 years. Stand-up

1:32

though, inconsistently, mostly sketch.

1:35

After getting sober after the last couple of years,

1:38

I have finally decided

1:40

to commit to stand-up in ways that I have

1:43

been resisting for

1:45

a while. It just feels right to me. I

1:49

would love to ask you for some real

1:52

tips on

1:53

getting over, or getting through rather,

1:56

the perfectionism, the insane perfectionism,

1:59

and feeling. of striking

2:02

out

2:02

I already have a lot of basic stuff

2:05

and I know I have

2:07

What I need to keep going, but I want to know

2:09

how You got

2:11

through any sort of perfectionism

2:13

and you know fucking There

2:17

she goes. I think I remember

2:19

you. I think I do I was a little

2:21

bit Guarded

2:24

because you were a little bit intense. I

2:26

was probably just nerves. Um all

2:28

that aside I think Um,

2:31

you know, I bet getting sober is going

2:33

to be a real Benefit

2:36

to figuring this stuff out especially

2:39

if you're in a ages or something like

2:41

you know some kind of process like that because

2:43

it teaches you among so much other stuff

2:45

that We're all in

2:48

process

2:49

and and it teaches you to accept yourself

2:52

You know, I still bomb sometimes

2:54

and I fucking hate it But I

2:56

I'm real good at shaking it up Rory's

2:59

always like amazed like when I don't have a

3:01

great set or you know I'm trying

3:03

shit or whatever because

3:05

I think he

3:06

Takes it on more with his

3:10

in you know stuff He's

3:12

a little bit more of a perfectionist and I

3:14

kind of shake it off a little more But um,

3:17

it works for me because I just take whatever I can

3:19

learn from it and I move on But

3:22

this is a really good question because it's not

3:24

just about stand-up comedy it

3:26

is for you But it's you know, I think people

3:29

can Hear it in terms

3:31

of just life in general I think because

3:33

the stuff you have to work on is

3:35

the same it's figuring out

3:39

How to be in the moment corny

3:42

In hippie and whatever

3:44

therapy ish is that sounds it's

3:46

not About

3:49

reciting a humorous monologue

3:51

that you've written and memorized

3:54

it's about

3:55

taking these thoughts and bringing

3:57

them to an audience and reacting to only

4:00

the moment you are in and existing

4:05

just in this moment you're in

4:07

together with these people. And

4:09

nobody perfects it.

4:12

And it's a practice. That's all it is.

4:14

It's practice. But I think

4:16

it really helps. You

4:18

know, what's funny to you? Comedy

4:23

dies in the second guessing of an audience.

4:25

Find out what's funny

4:27

to you. What's

4:30

interesting to you. And

4:32

then, yeah, it's the minutia

4:35

of tweaking words and pauses

4:37

in order

4:40

to make it work. Or that's my, you

4:42

know, everyone's process is completely different.

4:44

There is not one way to do comedy at all.

4:47

You know, no matter how much you prepare,

4:50

you have to be willing to throw it all

4:52

away and just be in the moment. I mean, improv,

4:55

which I'm terrible at, is

4:57

all about being in the moment and

4:59

not thinking. Don't think is the, is

5:02

like the UCB slogan, you know.

5:04

But it also is just your best

5:06

bet at thriving in comedy.

5:08

You prepare, you work on

5:10

it, and then you got to, once

5:13

you're on stage, throw it all away because if you're just reaching

5:15

or I bring notes on stage because

5:18

if you're sitting and kind of reaching to try

5:20

to remember what you wanted to say next or

5:22

what,

5:24

it's no good. You're out of the moment. You're

5:27

not there. And the audience smells

5:29

it. I mean, I can fuck

5:31

up a bit and then the rest of the

5:34

show, I'm just saying words while

5:36

toiling over that one thing from

5:39

the first five minutes of the set, you know,

5:41

in my inner monologue. And

5:43

then the whole set

5:44

is inauthentic because

5:47

I'm saying, I'm talking,

5:50

but I'm still in a moment from 10 minutes

5:53

ago when I, you know, flubbed a word

5:55

or something. And that's just useless.

5:57

It's not helpful. So it's

5:59

a practice. It's very hard

6:01

to perfect the practice like

6:04

fucking yoga or something

6:06

or everything.

6:11

Just remember there's not a single comedian

6:14

in the whole world who

6:17

didn't start out,

6:20

you know, having done nothing.

6:24

Everyone, every comic,

6:26

the biggest stars, your biggest heroes went

6:30

up for the first time and the second

6:32

time and the third time and, you know, terrified,

6:36

nervous. But if you do it, if

6:39

you do stand up, you've got to do it because

6:41

you have to do it. Because

6:44

you can't not do it. Any other

6:46

reason is probably not worth

6:48

the pain and the

6:50

tourists. And

6:53

honestly, mostly have fun because

6:55

if it's not feeding you and it's

6:58

not fun and it's not something you feel like

7:00

you need to do, maybe it's not for you. But,

7:02

you know, check in with yourself every so often. Am

7:04

I having fun? Is this the dream? You

7:07

know,

7:08

I still do. And the

7:10

answer's got to be yes. But

7:12

good luck. Good

7:15

luck. What

7:17

else? Hi, Sarah. I

7:19

was just calling to let you know that you helped me out. I

7:23

wrote this sitting next to my grandma who

7:26

was in her hospital bed. She's recovering from sepsis.

7:30

And we really, really didn't get along.

7:34

She's racist. She loves Trump. She

7:36

hates masks. She asked me what I was doing about Biden's

7:38

illegals problem. You name it.

7:41

The lady hated liberals. I'm

7:43

a hardcore social worker in Washington, DC and

7:45

I house homeless families for a living. So

7:48

obviously we didn't see eye to eye on a lot of stuff.

7:52

But honestly, the second she got sick, it didn't matter anymore.

7:55

I realized

7:57

that we're all kind of just like...

7:59

body bags with these

8:01

strong opinions and at the end of

8:03

the day who you voted for, what

8:06

you care about, none of that matters. But

8:10

yeah, I guess what I was calling

8:12

to tell you was that like your advice about seeing

8:16

Trump supporters as humans and trying

8:18

to, you know, ask some questions instead of just

8:20

shutting them down. We're

8:22

all just humans, man. She

8:25

died this morning. I'm a little sad about it,

8:27

but I'm also at peace because I

8:30

was nice to her for the last couple of days. And

8:32

I'm going to miss arguing with her. That

8:34

was her shtick. We fought.

8:36

We liked debate. It may have been

8:39

her love language. I knew that was what I was in for

8:41

when I talked to her. And I'm going

8:43

to miss other good things about her, like her laugh and

8:46

stuff she did for me when I was a kid. But

8:49

yeah, thanks for your advice. It

8:51

really, really helped me in this hard time. And

8:54

I saw you at Jam in the Van last week. You

8:56

fucking rocked. Rory did amazing.

8:58

I didn't know Rory was that funny. Anyway,

9:01

love you. Bye.

9:02

Wow. Wow.

9:05

Got to call morning of. Thank

9:08

you so much for calling back.

9:10

Man, I love hearing what

9:13

happened. And

9:16

the fact that as she was dying, you

9:18

were able to just love

9:21

her for everything she was. And and

9:25

and

9:28

everything that you thought mattered didn't

9:31

matter. And

9:33

holy shit, what if we could get

9:35

to that place without

9:38

someone dying,

9:40

without it taking that? That's the next

9:42

step for us in America

9:44

or humanity or whatever. Can

9:47

we get to that place where you realize it

9:49

as as mortality sets

9:51

in

9:52

before mortality? It's like I knew

9:54

when my mom died that

9:56

everything I adored and

9:58

loved and that was

9:59

amazing about her would float to the top.

10:02

I knew that. And so I would

10:04

try to imagine she was dead

10:07

before she was dead, not because I wanted

10:09

her to be dead,

10:10

because I wanted to have that

10:13

pure feeling

10:15

of love. And

10:19

it was really hard to do until she was gone.

10:21

I mean, I love my mom. I miss her so

10:24

much. But

10:25

how do we get there to total

10:28

acceptance

10:30

before a person

10:32

is dying or, you know, tragedy?

10:35

How can we

10:38

do what tragedy does for us without

10:41

the tragedy? I don't know. But

10:44

boy, that's interesting. And thanks for calling back.

10:46

All right, what else?

10:47

Hi, Sarah. This is Sarah.

10:52

I wanted to get your thoughts on sort

10:55

of a bizarre situation I find myself

10:57

in. One empath

10:59

to another.

11:01

My partner and I recently tried some non-monogamy. And

11:04

it went really well in some places and not so well

11:06

in others. And on his

11:09

side, his situation with this

11:11

woman that he was involved with briefly ended

11:13

up with some pretty big feelings, particularly

11:16

on her side, which is why they broke

11:18

it off.

11:20

And I discovered recently because I knew what

11:22

she looked like because, you know, duh,

11:24

Instagram, I

11:27

saw that she worked across the street from me.

11:29

Like I saw her at the

11:31

neighboring business. And I

11:33

knew that she had some reservations about

11:36

knowing me or meeting me. And I just didn't want her to be

11:38

blindsided. So with,

11:41

you know, the consent of my partner, I reached

11:43

out to her, I just sent her a DM and said

11:45

like, Hey,

11:46

no pressure to respond to this. Just want to let you know,

11:48

I saw you. I work

11:51

across the street, we might run into each other.

11:53

I just want you to know that like, I feel a

11:55

lot of openness towards you. You can know me if you

11:57

want to, you don't, but I don't want you to be blindsided.

12:01

do with this what you will. And she responded

12:03

quite badly. And I'm heartbroken

12:05

that my tender reach out

12:07

went that badly. I know that's hers, but

12:11

yeah, I just want maybe your

12:13

thoughts on how

12:16

to process. Yeah, okay.

12:22

You were lovely

12:25

and you reached out and there's

12:29

a pride in doing lovely things. And

12:32

you want these things to be received

12:35

the way you imagine they should be received,

12:38

but we can't control that shit,

12:41

you know? Like

12:44

close your eyes and imagine this, if

12:46

you will.

12:47

You're dating a married man who's in

12:49

an open relationship and you really

12:51

connect and fall for this person. And

12:54

because of your connection, he breaks it

12:57

off because the deal with his wife

12:59

was sex and not love,

13:01

you know? And

13:03

then this wife reaches

13:06

out to you on your Instagram and

13:10

says basically, hey, no hard feelings.

13:15

You know, what you meant

13:17

and what she heard are not gonna

13:19

be the same thing. She's in a very

13:21

different place than you are in

13:24

this scenario.

13:26

You can't make her feelings disappear

13:28

just because you're

13:30

lovely, you know? Unfortunately,

13:34

you know, she does not owe it

13:36

to you to reciprocate your

13:39

vibe.

13:40

She didn't ask for it. And this is not

13:42

me scolding you. It sounds like something

13:44

I would totally do, but

13:47

I think part of it's ego,

13:50

you know? You might wanna sit and really ask

13:52

yourself

13:54

how you expected her to respond,

13:56

how you wanted her to respond.

13:58

And

13:58

if that was really... Maybe

14:01

if sending that DM was really about

14:04

her comfort, or could

14:06

it possibly have been about ego?

14:12

Or a little bit of both. I say this as

14:14

a sister in this kind of behavior. This

14:17

is a really good thing to think about

14:19

and wonder about.

14:21

It's like if you go to leave a really big tip

14:23

at the coffee shop and

14:26

you're leaving like a $5 or $10

14:28

bill and you wait for the barista

14:30

to see you put it in. And

14:32

they see, but they don't go,

14:34

oh wow, thanks. They just say, have

14:37

a good day. And

14:39

it's not what you wanted. You wanted to really

14:42

impress them. But do you regret

14:44

leaving the tip? Because you didn't get

14:46

what you wanted? And if so, what

14:49

was that tip really about and who was it really

14:51

for? Now this analogy is a little bit

14:53

different because though it may

14:56

serve your ego, it also for

14:58

sure serves the barista.

15:01

But anyway, I digress. I don't know

15:03

if this helps, but it's

15:05

always a good thing to kind of look at your

15:08

quote unquote lovely behavior

15:11

and reaching out to someone and

15:14

ask yourself what you really wanted from it

15:16

or what it really came from. I

15:19

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15:21

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15:23

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sold. There are places where they

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sell books. And we're back. Sarah,

18:54

I'm wondering if you can help me out.

18:57

I met this guy seven years ago. We

19:01

didn't talk again. We got to talking

19:03

a year later. We

19:05

were, you know, whatever, situationship

19:08

for a whole year. Then

19:10

the girl he'd been stringing along since high

19:12

school came back into his life. Fast

19:16

forward five years. I still can't

19:18

get over it. And he still

19:21

comes and plays with me. Like

19:23

he'll call me up. And of course I can't

19:25

say no. And

19:29

then I, it's the best I've ever had. And

19:32

then no, it's not. He's gone. He

19:34

doesn't know me. He doesn't care. Can't

19:37

answer a phone. He's a

19:39

ghost.

19:41

And I just can't get over it.

19:43

I've met a lot of other men and I know

19:45

that he doesn't deserve

19:48

me. I know he's a punk. He has serious

19:50

issues with substances, alcohol,

19:53

drugs, whatever. He's

19:55

just very immature. I know he's not

19:57

the man for me.

19:59

I've just never. seen anyone else i can

20:01

i've got my eyes open i

20:04

just don't know how to get over i

20:07

should probably find a therapist but

20:09

i saw your your podcast

20:12

year and i'm just wondering what you might say

20:15

maybe you'll have some words of wisdom that

20:17

can make me make

20:19

me shake on ones for all yeah

20:22

i mean come on this is the story

20:25

as old as time the bad boy

20:27

this has nothing to do with hit him

20:31

and everything to do with you and

20:33

the solution is

20:36

inside of you you're

20:38

attracted to someone who treats you the

20:41

way you somewhere

20:43

deep inside of yourself

20:45

think you deserve to be treated

20:47

you

20:47

know i'm sure is a good guy and uses the flaky

20:50

and blah blah blah whatever

20:53

unless you are in a place where you

20:56

are so thrilled when he comes

20:58

around don't miss them when he gone

21:00

but that is clearly not the case

21:03

i know it feels like love that

21:05

you have for him but it isn't

21:07

it's disdain for yourself

21:11

it's a lack ah you know it just it

21:13

is let me

21:15

guess he's funny he's fine

21:18

when he does give you attention it's like

21:20

a lighthouse shining it's light

21:22

on you

21:24

and

21:26

it's amazing a word

21:29

you know a lighthouse only shines on

21:31

you for a fraction of the time

21:34

and the rest of the time you

21:36

are in the dark and it's cold

21:39

though you know when he comes around

21:41

a shines a light on you

21:44

you just want to believe it staying but

21:46

it's not ever

21:48

and you you've seen that pattern you

21:51

know the pattern he's

21:54

not that guy this

21:57

is no way to live

21:59

so Go to therapy. It's

22:02

awesome. You deserve better

22:05

than this. You know, even if working

22:07

with a shrink or...

22:11

Listen.

22:13

If you can change your perspective by

22:15

just 1%,

22:17

the whole world looks different. You

22:19

might even learn to be attracted to someone

22:22

who thinks that you light the stars. And

22:27

that's, boy, the dream. My

22:29

guess is right now you're disgusted by that.

22:32

So get some help so

22:35

you can have a real reciprocal

22:39

love in this one lifetime

22:41

we have on this planet

22:44

and outer space that we know of. Good

22:48

luck. What else? Hello,

22:50

Sarah. I just

22:53

wanted to ask, since

22:55

you're from New Hampshire, I am also

22:57

from New Hampshire. I'm from King, New Hampshire. And

22:59

I just wanted to know what was your experience

23:02

like getting out? How did you

23:04

get out of New Hampshire? I

23:07

see it's kind of like most

23:09

people I know, they just feel

23:11

stuck there. They never leave. And

23:14

I just wanted to hear your story about that. Thank

23:18

you. You know, I

23:22

went through a horrible depression from 13

23:24

to 16 years old. Where

23:27

I just,

23:29

I went from being very social

23:32

to not bearing

23:36

to be with any friends. Just

23:42

wanted to be alone, didn't want to go to school,

23:44

just couldn't. And

23:47

when my stepdad asked me what it felt

23:50

like, I said

23:52

it felt like, and this is exactly what it felt

23:54

like. It felt like

23:57

I was homesick, but

23:59

I was home. So

24:01

there was no way to satiate

24:03

it. I

24:07

went away to college

24:10

in New York City. And

24:12

that's how I got out. And I had

24:15

a partial scholarship and my dad subsidized

24:17

the rest. And I went to NYU

24:19

for one year. And after

24:23

that I was working 10 hours a day passing

24:25

out flyers for a comedy club and doing

24:27

stand-up where I could get on. That

24:30

kept me in New York City. And then until

24:32

I was,

24:33

by the time I was 22, I was completely

24:35

supporting myself. And

24:38

sometimes getting out just means just

24:41

leaving. You know, when I moved to

24:43

LA, I put zero thought into it.

24:46

When I moved from New York to LA, I

24:48

met someone, Tracy Katsky, who lived there. And

24:50

she said her roommate was moving out. And

24:52

I could move in with her. And I said, all right.

24:56

And I got out there and I got to use Toyota

24:58

Corolla and boom, I lived somewhere new. I don't know. You

25:01

know, if it didn't work out, maybe

25:04

I'd move back to New York or maybe I don't

25:06

know. You

25:07

can always move back if shit doesn't

25:10

work out or you miss it. But

25:13

New Hampshire, though, I lived there my whole

25:15

life. First 18 years of my life.

25:19

It wasn't until the day I moved to New York

25:21

City that I stopped feeling that

25:24

feeling of being homesick.

25:27

I just, I was from New York and

25:29

I didn't know it, you know, and I just

25:32

felt like I was home. Maybe visit a place

25:34

you might want to move to or that you're interested

25:37

in. I don't

25:39

know if you work from home like so many

25:41

people do now, but,

25:44

you know, if you can, go live in an Airbnb,

25:46

an Airbnb, your house. And

25:50

so you can pay for it and test the waters

25:52

somewhere else. Take a chance.

25:54

Have an adventure. See what happens next. Live

25:57

on the edge of your seat,

25:59

you know? What

26:01

is there to lose? On the other side,

26:03

I mean, I don't know what your, yeah, see

26:06

a new place. I mean,

26:08

obviously, as they say, wherever

26:11

you go, there you are. But

26:14

yeah, check out new places. Go

26:17

for it. Let me know how

26:19

it turns out. Call back. All

26:22

right, what else? Hello, Sarah. This is Sam

26:24

calling from Chicago. I did

26:26

have a question. I've been listening

26:28

to

26:29

your podcast ever since

26:31

the beginning. And I know that you set

26:34

it up and started during

26:38

pandemic, even though we're still in the pandemic.

26:41

And you set

26:44

it up as like, leave me some voicemails.

26:49

And I'll respond to you. I

26:51

wanted to know what

26:53

your expectations were,

26:55

I guess, of this

26:58

setup. So were you expecting, what

27:01

kind of calls were you expecting? Were

27:03

you expecting more like

27:06

funnier calls or more

27:09

serious calls? And

27:11

does the current situation kind

27:14

of live up to those expectations?

27:17

And how do you kind

27:19

of prepare for those

27:21

calls that do

27:23

offer, ask you some big life

27:26

advice questions?

27:27

So I'm kind of running

27:30

out of time here, but

27:32

thank you and goodbye.

27:34

You know, this isn't what I expected, but

27:36

I don't know what I expected. I knew I didn't

27:39

want guests. Every once in

27:41

a while, there are people or something, but I didn't want

27:43

a show that relied on guests because there's

27:46

nothing I hate more. Like the thought of

27:49

asking

27:50

people to come on my podcast

27:53

is I'm so averse to

27:55

it. It makes me so cringe. I

27:57

used to, and I will again, but this

27:59

is the pandemic, but I used to have a party every year,

28:02

one party, pretty much the one I went

28:04

to. And

28:07

I always have a huge sign that I made

28:09

that I put up at it that says

28:11

something like, no

28:14

podcast solicitations. You

28:17

know, like, just because like, I just

28:19

feel like so many times, it's such a great party.

28:21

And it's just like, everyone there is a conversation

28:24

you want. There's no one you're avoiding. It's just

28:26

lovely. And,

28:28

you know, everyone, I feel

28:30

like it's a party where people meet people

28:32

and make new friends. People see people

28:34

they haven't seen in a long time. It's just

28:36

a very eclectic group.

28:39

And there's nothing worse than meeting a

28:41

new person and bonding

28:44

with them and making new friend and opening

28:47

up and then them saying like, I'd love for you to

28:49

come on my podcast. Like, I just didn't

28:51

want it. Wanted it to be a safe space

28:53

from that. But I just the thought

28:56

of it, I wrote a book, you know, I wrote The Bedwetter.

28:59

They wanted me to get people for blurbs. And

29:01

there's like a book season because there's always like

29:04

one month a year where everyone's

29:06

asking me for blurbs. I cannot

29:09

ask. I couldn't do it. I wouldn't do

29:11

it.

29:11

Much to HarperCollins chagrin. I

29:14

just made up fake fictional

29:16

blurbs. I'm just uncomfortable

29:18

with that stuff.

29:19

So, so I and I wanted to

29:22

just talk, but I did want to talk to

29:25

strangers. And and so

29:28

the one podcast I love listening

29:30

to that isn't like a news podcast

29:33

is Endless Honeymoon with Natasha

29:35

Leger and Moshe Kasher. And they were taking

29:37

calls. Like they

29:39

had like a phone line where they had voicemails.

29:42

So I was like, that's what I'd like to

29:44

do. I'd like to have people call in and let

29:46

the calls just be the trajectory of

29:48

the show. And that is what this is.

29:51

It did. That is where

29:53

expectation might result. But the trajectory

29:55

of where this show has gone is in

29:58

a direction that

29:58

I would not have. predicted, far

30:01

more earnest than

30:05

I would have predicted, and a real

30:07

kind of community

30:10

of just incredibly random, diverse

30:12

callers. I never

30:14

thought, also, I'm just

30:17

not worldly, where I

30:19

am always so surprised by

30:21

the international – like

30:23

the people calling from all

30:25

different countries and all different places,

30:28

all different – it's as

30:31

diverse as I could ever

30:33

dream, you know? And

30:35

I really like that. But

30:38

yeah, I was definitely inspired by them, but their show

30:40

is hilarious. God, I just

30:43

love it. It's like hanging out with friends. I mean,

30:45

they are my friends, but it is like hanging out

30:47

with friends. And boy, are they funny, and

30:49

they're funny together. But

30:52

very, very different show, you

30:54

know.

30:56

But was it? They take live

30:58

calls now, which is so cool.

31:01

And I would like to do some time. When we did the live

31:03

show, we had live questions and live people.

31:07

But

31:08

you know, it may not have been what I wanted, but

31:10

it was what I needed.

31:13

It was what I deserved? Is that the saying? I don't know. I've

31:15

just – I've learned so much and feel

31:19

very not alone sitting

31:21

here listening

31:22

to all of y'all.

31:24

So that's my answer, and I'm sticking to it. Here's

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34:23

Hi Sarah,

34:26

my name is Aydana. I'm

34:28

from Argentina

34:30

from Buenos Aires. I

34:33

love your podcast. I follow

34:36

you a lot in

34:38

your stand-ups and I

34:42

like the way you say things and

34:45

the way, the things

34:47

you find funny and

34:50

they are very interesting to me. So

34:54

I

34:56

just wanted to tell you and maybe

34:59

listen to your opinion. I had

35:01

some travel with

35:03

a friend

35:05

this year. She was my

35:08

best friend and for

35:10

some stupid things they are not serious

35:13

but they disappointed

35:16

me a lot. We

35:19

are not really close

35:21

right now. We are still friends but

35:25

first she wasn't close

35:27

to me and I wanted

35:31

to get things better but now

35:34

I don't because I think I can't forgive

35:36

her.

35:38

She didn't ask for my forgiveness

35:41

and I think I feel I

35:44

can't give it to her. How

35:46

do I do? Because I don't want to end

35:49

the friendship so I don't know.

35:52

Oh, well, you know,

35:55

not knowing what went down I can only tell you

35:57

that it sounds like you have...

38:00

So good luck. Call

38:02

back and let me know what happened. What

38:05

else? Hey, Sarah. My name is Maddie,

38:07

a long-time fan. I'm 27

38:10

years old and I have a sister who

38:12

is 24. She

38:14

had her second baby a

38:17

few months ago, but she

38:19

hasn't spoken to me in over three years.

38:23

I was addicted to Xanax

38:26

for a while and she wouldn't speak to me then,

38:28

which is understandable,

38:29

but I quit Xanax so I could spend time

38:31

with her and her baby.

38:33

She still found

38:35

excuses for me to not be in her life,

38:39

such as that I'm a sex worker and she

38:42

says that my money is dirty and that she doesn't

38:44

want her daughter being raised

38:47

or in the same environment as somebody

38:50

with dirty money and who doesn't have morals, is

38:52

her words. I'm not

38:55

going to quit sex work. I've been doing this for years

38:58

and it's a really good job for me,

39:00

but I just don't know what to do. It

39:02

breaks my heart. She was my best friend growing

39:04

up

39:05

and we lost her dad when I

39:07

was 16, and we were best

39:09

friends. So we know how it feels

39:11

to lose someone. I just want

39:14

to know what to do because

39:16

she won't talk to me

39:18

and it sucks. I feel like I lost somebody

39:21

who hasn't even died yet and it's terrible.

39:23

Please help me. I love you, Sarah.

39:25

Thank you. Oh, sweetie. I

39:27

am so sorry. I'm

39:30

so sorry to hear this. I wish that

39:33

she could accept you for all of your

39:35

parts as

39:37

you do her. It's

39:40

just heartbreaking and I'm just

39:42

a little bit at a loss. You

39:47

can't force someone to have a relationship with

39:49

you if they don't want to. All I can

39:51

say is I think

39:55

she's making a mistake and

39:57

I think she's really missing out. Sex

39:59

work.