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welcome back, everybody. Thank you so

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much for being here. We

1:00

are here with many of the

1:02

cast members and the composer of

1:05

The Sheridan Tapes. And

1:08

let's get back. This is a

1:10

question for Virginia. This is from

1:12

Hikage. They want to know,

1:14

while being poly is becoming more common,

1:16

it still doesn't seem understood even in

1:18

the queer community. How did

1:20

you go about writing, in my opinion, a

1:23

very accurate depiction of a very monogamous couple

1:25

becoming a little more open to polyamory when

1:27

it's brought up in a consensual manner? Yeah.

1:32

I won't pretend to

1:34

be an expert on poly. I

1:38

got into it because I was in a decade-long

1:42

marriage, realized I was extremely

1:44

queer, a friend expressed

1:46

interest in me, and I specifically

1:48

wanted to date her. So

1:51

my experience was not really jumping

1:54

in fully like, oh

1:56

man, I'm solo polyamorous now

1:59

and I'm I'm going to go date a bunch of people.

2:01

I still have not really gone on dates with

2:03

people because that's not the place in

2:05

my life that I am in right now.

2:09

So when I wrote it, it was a

2:12

similar thing where it was specifically

2:14

Ned and Bill realizing

2:16

that they had deeper feelings for each other.

2:19

And Ned and

2:21

Bill and Rob realizing they trusted each other

2:24

enough at that point that they could just

2:26

talk about it very regularly,

2:28

which in my experience

2:30

is exactly how it goes. I

2:33

think it feels very scary if you've

2:35

never experienced before or if

2:37

you've had bad experiences because that can

2:39

happen. Just like bad experiences can happen in

2:41

monogamy. But

2:45

it's honestly just like being regular

2:48

people with each other and being honest about how you

2:50

feel. So yeah, I just

2:52

wrote that straight from my own experience. And I

2:55

don't share a lot publicly about

2:58

my inner journey with polyamory because

3:00

I still don't really know what

3:02

it's going to be. But

3:06

yeah, I just decided to write from the heart

3:08

with that. And I'm pleased that it's hit people

3:10

in a good way. And that was my hope.

3:13

And the next question is also

3:15

for you, Virginia. This is from Maya,

3:17

who is going to absolutely

3:19

destroy our hearts with this one.

3:22

What did Alan and Sam say to each other at

3:24

the top of the ladder in the coastal city in

3:26

season two? Yeah,

3:29

so I'll preface this by

3:31

saying, I don't think

3:35

it matters specifically what

3:38

was said. I do have an idea of what was said. But

3:41

it's one of those things that I wanted to leave

3:43

vague because I think that

3:45

little moment being kept private

3:47

is really beautiful. But

3:50

the vibe of it is I

3:53

have to go take care of something. But when I

3:55

get back, I'll spend eternity with you. Of

4:00

course, like Jesse's the fucking

4:02

strings that Jesse wrote

4:04

for the song that's playing during

4:07

what is that, episode 38? Yeah,

4:09

it's Sam Bailey's theme. It's playing

4:11

at full blast there. It's

4:14

just so tear

4:16

jerking. I'm still so proud of that episode.

4:20

My tears are jerked right now, actually, which

4:22

is why I'm really glad that

4:24

question 10 is much more lighthearted.

4:26

Thank you, Jonah. That

4:29

is Russell's favorite toy. All

4:32

right, everyone, we're gonna have to leave. Let's

4:36

get into it. It's got

4:39

to be a true toy, right? It has to be blue

4:41

because that's like the only color dogs can see, right? Is

4:45

it? It doesn't

4:47

mean a toy, not that color

4:49

would just not exist to them.

4:52

You'd never get my dog. I

4:59

mean, he seems like he's a boy that would

5:02

really love a peanut butter Kong too, though. Something

5:05

he can get real messy with. That's

5:07

a messy breather. He

5:09

must be a messy eater. Yeah,

5:12

a little bit. I

5:14

would say probably just like a

5:16

good bone that he can chew on for several

5:19

days. I

5:22

don't see Russell as at least in the current

5:25

series, the most active dog on the planet. No,

5:28

definitely. We've all heard him breathe. It's definitely

5:30

not a ball dog, not a tug dog.

5:32

He just wants something to chew on. He

5:34

might make it seem like he wants you

5:36

to throw the toy, but he's never going

5:38

to bring it back to you if you

5:40

do. He just wants to see it fly.

5:42

It's amazing. When you

5:44

play Fetch with Russell, it's one throw. He

5:46

goes and gets it and then sits down.

5:49

Where he picks it up. That's it. That's

5:51

the end. It's just a little walk

5:53

for Russell, really. And we love him for it. Russell

5:58

is a good boy. I was promised a debate

6:00

and all of you are too nice to each

6:02

other. I was expecting I tried. I

6:06

tried. I was being contentious. So

6:12

this next question comes from Jay. He

6:15

wants to know, what would you

6:17

say were the pivotal moments in each of

6:19

your characters journeys? And do you think they

6:21

received an apt conclusion? Well,

6:27

talk about a conclusion. Oh,

6:31

somebody else want to go. I

6:35

guess there is a question specifically for Ezra

6:37

and a couple and a couple of questions

6:39

here. Yeah, I I

6:42

think for Kate, it was in

6:44

episode 69 when Kate asked nice

6:47

when Kate asked Peter to to

6:49

take Andrew and to go stay with

6:52

his aunt Ruth in Toronto until the

6:54

dangerous like Finding Anna, saving the world

6:56

mission is over because

6:59

as they talk about in that

7:01

discussion, which is like interspersed with

7:03

Bill and Rob making a similar decision of like if

7:06

they're going to stay or go. It's

7:10

like she's been afraid to like

7:13

ask him to take over

7:15

as the primary parent, which she feels

7:17

like she should be doing. And

7:21

her career was really important to her for a

7:23

bit. But there's a sort of like restlessness that's

7:25

come out of Kate that like this

7:28

adventure to go find Anna is sort

7:30

of helping her connect with herself and

7:32

her individuality again. And that also feels

7:34

like deeply important to her. And she

7:36

says at one point, like, I need

7:38

to know if it's possible to come

7:40

back from something like this as a

7:42

reason for why she needs to find

7:45

Anna. So, yeah,

7:49

I think that was pretty pivotal for her

7:51

to to be able to finally stop pretending

7:53

like she's able to do both really, really

7:55

well. And then

7:57

I think the end of the

8:00

show. where her idea

8:02

of family has expanded. Her and Peter and

8:04

Bill and Rob are on this little

8:06

farm in Maine together. And Andrew

8:08

has so many parents all of

8:10

a sudden, and she finds

8:12

a girlfriend in an open mic night. It's

8:16

that sense of individual freedom

8:18

and family is not

8:21

separate anymore. She found a way to

8:24

really embrace all of herself, integrate all

8:26

of herself. So yeah, I think it's

8:28

an app's conclusion. I think

8:30

a pivotal moment for Ren was also in

8:32

episode 69 when Ren was forced to

8:35

kind of make that decision to really

8:37

tear into everybody at Caldwell's request and

8:40

really like make decisions of am

8:42

I choosing Isfas side and am I not? Because

8:44

I think that really kind of hit the character

8:46

in the sense of after that, he realized maybe

8:49

this isn't the person I wanna be. Because you

8:51

see Ren making a lot of changes after that

8:53

point. He really like has a lot of guilt from

8:55

that point on. And he finally starts to

8:57

like season four, he gives up

8:59

on Isfas completely, it feels like. And it's just

9:01

like, no, I need to go back to my friends.

9:03

And like when he has that meeting with Caldwell,

9:05

he makes a whole different decisions where it's like, no,

9:08

I can't come back to you guys.

9:10

And by the end of

9:12

the series, it's like I don't know if

9:14

Ren's conclusion is completely there yet. Cause I

9:16

still feel a lot of turmoil from Ren

9:18

by even the last episode where he's still

9:20

kind of trying to decide where

9:22

do I fit in? What do I wanna do?

9:24

What are my goals? Like where am I taking

9:26

this? And so I think that's, but

9:29

I kind of like that. It feels kind of

9:31

fitting for Ren that there are still questions. Ren's

9:33

always asking so many questions. It doesn't feel right

9:35

for their story that it would end

9:37

on an answer. Ooh, ooh, that's a

9:39

good sound bite. Oh yeah. Wow. But

9:43

that's what makes Ren so compelling

9:45

is that Ren is always asking

9:47

questions. Every question begets nine

9:49

other questions. They

9:52

are beautiful in their

9:55

non-conclusion, I suppose is the way to put it. They're

9:58

like sitting around the campfire and everyone's like, we save

10:00

the world and Ren's like, did

10:02

we? You're like, for now.

10:07

Ren is like simmer down. Let's not talk about that. Yeah,

10:09

maybe not. I

10:14

know that there's a Ned question coming up, but

10:16

I think that for Ned actually

10:18

a pivotal moment, I don't know what episode

10:20

number it was, but it was the episode

10:22

where he, like they're at karaoke and

10:24

he shows up and no one

10:26

is happy to see him. I'm

10:30

so serious. Yeah,

10:33

that sounds like a joke, but I think

10:35

that was actually the pivotal moment for Ned

10:37

because he was like excited to see these

10:39

people, low key, like wanted to

10:41

see them so bad and no one was happy

10:43

to see him and everyone was very uncomfortable and

10:45

he had to take a look at himself and

10:48

be like, okay, how can I fix this? Because

10:50

obviously if I want to

10:52

be around these people, I'm going to have to do

10:54

something. And I think that, you

10:56

know, independent of Ned's ultimate

10:59

fate as a character, I think he

11:02

had a really amazing arc with

11:05

traveling with Sam, Kate and Ren, becoming

11:08

genuine friends with them, earning their trust

11:10

after obliterating any chance

11:13

at having trust with people. I think it

11:15

was a really, really great time for him.

11:17

And I think it was really satisfying for

11:19

me for sure, but hopefully for everybody else.

11:21

Yeah, absolutely. I wasn't expecting

11:24

that answer. I really liked that though, as

11:26

Ned's pivot point. That makes a lot of sense. Yeah.

11:30

For Sam, I

11:34

feel like the pivotal moments for him were

11:38

the confrontation with the Echo in Agate

11:40

Shore in episode 25, where

11:42

he finally kind of puts all the

11:44

pieces together about like his past and

11:46

what happened with the lake and who

11:49

and what he is. And

11:52

then that moment on

11:54

the ladders with Alan, obviously that was a

11:56

big step in him, you know, letting

11:59

go of Sam. some of that grief and starting

12:01

to move forward. And

12:03

then I think it's episode 68, the one right before 69,

12:07

the conversation that Sam has with Kate

12:09

right after he tries to jump

12:11

into the source and save

12:14

Molly on his own without telling anyone else

12:16

and finally gets called out for it. I

12:20

think that after that, he's much more of a

12:23

team player in a lot of

12:25

ways and is working, actually

12:28

cares what everyone else on the team thinks

12:31

and like, yeah. And

12:36

then also the conversation with Ned,

12:39

episode 76 when they're both trapped under the

12:41

rubble, I feel like that also

12:44

kind of puts them on the path to where he is at the end

12:46

of the series. Yeah. But

12:49

yeah, in terms of how I feel

12:51

about his final conclusion, I'm

12:56

pretty happy with it. I

12:59

do feel like he's

13:01

in a healthier place and I

13:04

still feel like Sam would

13:06

still need some kind of

13:08

puzzle to kind of keep

13:11

his mind occupied to keep him from going

13:14

kind of crazy. But

13:18

yeah, generally, yeah, I'm pretty happy with

13:20

where his arc ended up. What

13:24

would you say were the pivotal moments

13:26

in your character's journey and

13:29

do you think they received an

13:31

apt conclusion? So

13:33

I'm gonna answer the second part of

13:36

that question first. Yes, I do. I

13:38

do think that Anna received

13:40

an apt conclusion. I

13:43

think she ended up right

13:46

where she needed to be and

13:50

I love that for her. As

13:52

far as pivotal moments go, I'd

13:55

have to say that in

13:59

terms of any... pivots, it would

14:01

be more in a thematic

14:03

sense for Anna, not

14:05

just, you know, her various adventures

14:09

or being stuck in the source and

14:11

then being rescued. I would

14:13

say her biggest pivot

14:15

was how she

14:18

went from a more solitary

14:20

existence to one that

14:24

was more familial, one

14:27

that was more open and more loving. And

14:31

I think that that's been the biggest

14:33

change for her. And I

14:35

think that that's beautiful for

14:37

her. I'm so glad

14:39

that she went from,

14:41

I don't want

14:44

to say loneliness because I don't know that

14:46

she was lonely or recognized

14:48

that she was lonely, but

14:50

that she's more open. I love that she's

14:52

more open. I guess is what I'm trying

14:54

to say and is letting

14:56

love in. And

15:01

that's great. I love that for her. Oh

15:04

man, there are so many for her. I

15:07

think obviously very, very pivotal

15:09

was losing Anna in the

15:11

first place. That

15:14

really put Maria in not

15:16

a great headspace for a while, but

15:19

her second pivotal point was

15:21

realizing that and

15:24

realizing that she

15:26

can, not that she can, that

15:28

she wanted to keep

15:31

going because for a while I'm

15:33

not sure she knew if she did want to

15:35

or not. I'd

15:37

say the next pivotal after that was

15:39

Maria taking some time for

15:41

herself with her family. And of course

15:43

still doing Maria things and doing investigating

15:45

because I don't think she'd be Maria

15:47

without that. I

15:50

think that time was really good for her. We

15:53

had a joke during recording that all

15:55

of the characters were suffering so many

15:57

different things and there's Maria just. Chillin'

16:01

self-care, self-care. And

16:03

you know what? That's good. That's great for her,

16:05

and that's only good for all of us, honestly.

16:08

And when she came back from

16:10

that time, and she rejoined

16:13

the group, and she took her actions, and

16:16

then got Anna back, that

16:18

is also extremely pivotal. And

16:21

Anna asking her to move in with

16:23

her. Very cute, very pivotal. Love that.

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17:36

So again, things got a little heavy, so let's

17:38

make it a little more lighthearted. Another

17:41

question from Jay and Maya.

17:44

What are your funniest memories of

17:46

recording? Were there any amusing bloopers?

17:48

Were you genuinely moved by any

17:50

moments? And what was your most

17:52

difficult moment as an actor? To

17:55

the porch! To the

17:57

porch! I am so pissed off

17:59

I forgot to... put that in the outtakes special. I

18:02

think I just didn't grab any of those outtakes when

18:04

I was doing the pre-edit for that. I

18:06

don't know why. It was getting close

18:09

to the end of the season and that's

18:11

when shit just starts to get necessary. It

18:15

goes to necessary functions only. It makes sense,

18:17

because I didn't make it in the bloopers.

18:20

It was such an inside joke.

18:22

And we were all just getting loopy and

18:24

just saying to the porch a million times

18:27

so I could get a lot of the art translated.

18:29

But to us, it's just hilarious. Yeah.

18:31

Yeah. So this is when we

18:34

were recording episode 90 where there

18:36

keeps being loops. So

18:38

we had done the same team. Yeah,

18:40

we'd done the same scene a couple

18:42

of times. And then Sam was like, let's

18:45

go watch The Porch. And so at the end

18:47

of each of these scenes, we just started going

18:49

like, turn the porch. And so anyway, that's the,

18:52

I have explained the inside joke now. You're

18:55

welcome. Now you are on the inside

18:57

of the joke. Now you are on

18:59

the inside. You're inside the joke and

19:02

the joke is inside. Oh,

19:04

boy. Ouroboros joked. I

19:09

also love the

19:12

memory of Ezra's first recording

19:14

session for episode

19:16

28 where Ned and Bill were having

19:20

this awkward heavy

19:24

pause conversation in

19:27

their patrol car. Ned

19:29

is trying to get to know Bill. And the conversation

19:31

isn't really flowing. And he's trying to figure out this

19:33

new person that he is also. And

19:36

between takes, we're joking around. Ezra

19:39

just goes like, so

19:41

you ever been to rehab? And I was like, did

19:43

I? Did I really? Yeah.

19:45

Yeah. You absolutely did.

19:48

Like, I knew

19:51

instantly that I would love Ezra forever as soon

19:53

as that came out of his mouth. Because it's

19:55

like, that's like a first session and

19:57

you just made a rehab joke. But it was so

19:59

fucking perfect. Perfect. And

20:01

it's so funny. You already got sort

20:03

of the... You were already

20:05

bringing that crazy chaotic

20:07

humor to Ned that would become such

20:09

a big part of his character. So

20:12

good memory. God, I'm so

20:14

glad you remember that. Also recording your

20:17

last scene in that episode, taking

20:19

a pause and asking, this is a

20:21

little gay. Should I lean into that? And

20:24

that essentially defined the arc for

20:26

your character for the next three

20:29

seasons. Yeah, if I had

20:31

a dollar for every time Virginia directed me

20:33

to be like gayer or hornier, it would

20:35

be at least five dollars. That's

20:39

enough to buy a foot long, folks. Hey,

20:41

yo. Oh,

20:44

geez. God, we had so much

20:46

fun working on this show. Like

20:48

I always... Yeah. I

20:50

get a little bit anxious before live recordings, but I

20:52

was always like so looking forward to recording for the

20:55

Sheridan tapes. I

20:57

had a lot of really fun times

21:00

with Virginia in particular. Yeah.

21:04

Like so many. And I've talked about them in other Q&A, so

21:06

I probably won't go over them again. But

21:09

two of my favorite recording

21:11

moments this season were

21:15

when Sam Taylor

21:17

was being Ned being Ren and

21:19

I actually got to hell. Oh my God, that was

21:21

so fun. That was in the

21:23

episode, obviously. With... Oh

21:25

my God. I got

21:28

to teach Sam how to be Ned and that was so

21:30

silly. I enjoyed it so much. And

21:32

I also... Oh, that was awesome. Recording with

21:34

Adrian was a lot of fun because he's

21:36

just fucking hilarious. Yes. He's so

21:38

funny. I really enjoyed him. The comedic

21:41

timing. Yeah. Oh God, I loved

21:43

all of that. Yeah. So

21:46

in that session

21:48

where Ned was

21:50

wearing Ren's skin suit, we

21:53

did this thing where Ezra

21:55

would say

21:57

something and then Sam would repeat it. And

21:59

then... would say it again and Sam would repeat

22:01

it. So we were just trying to get like the

22:04

little nuances that Ezra does

22:06

and his performance as Ned into Sam's mouth.

22:08

And that was just like so fricking cool.

22:12

And I think it worked. I think we pulled it

22:14

off. It was such a fun acting exercise. That is

22:16

like one of the highlights of this season for me

22:18

is getting to do that episode. That was so much

22:21

fun. I'm glad. I

22:23

really wish Ned had imitated

22:25

Sam at some point. It's

22:30

really funny that he didn't though. He's just like,

22:32

I won't for no reason to

22:35

say I'm off. It's like, you know, you're a big

22:37

loser. That has spares. Oh

22:42

my God. If I may, all

22:45

of you fuckers have made me cry. And

22:47

yes, Jesse, that includes you. And Mike, if

22:49

you're listening to this, even

22:51

though like Morrison himself didn't make me

22:53

cry, your actions made me cry. When

22:58

we were doing the table

23:01

reads for the last two episodes,

23:03

I was already like in a

23:05

heightened emotional state because it was

23:07

ending. But

23:11

like, it was a good thing that

23:13

I had my mic turned off because I was ugly

23:15

crying so much. The

23:19

closure that Sam got with Alan

23:21

and the episode where they end

23:24

with Van Winkle's just

23:27

voice going, Alan, just

23:30

good at me like a fish. Just

23:34

my viscera just spilled out

23:36

just everywhere. And

23:40

you know, most of what makes me cry are

23:42

the relationships. I love

23:45

Kate's relationship with her family and

23:48

the way that over time she builds out

23:50

a family even more. She's

23:53

got both her blood family that she

23:55

is just so loving and committed

23:57

to. And then a found family along the

23:59

way. the way it is so touching.

24:03

Ren's journey on drugs through the woods,

24:06

even though I don't have access to

24:08

either drugs or the woods, I still

24:10

related so much to

24:13

all of the questions that never seem to have

24:15

answers. Ren

24:17

is a character that I relate to a

24:20

lot in that way, just the constant anxiety

24:22

spirals. And you made me cry because of

24:24

the recognition and the compassion that

24:26

you brought to a very anxious character. I

24:30

thought it was really, really, really beautifully done. And

24:34

as I've told you so many times that like,

24:36

I have a dartboard with your face on it

24:38

because Ned's

24:40

death just, I, I

24:45

can't with the talking. You gotta

24:48

listen to episode 100, Meredith. I

24:50

know, I know. It's gonna make

24:52

you feel better, Meredith. I need to feel better.

24:55

And Erin and Amitola

24:58

are just like the epitome, epitome

25:01

of you can't have

25:03

one without the other. There

25:05

is no Anna

25:07

without Maria and there is no Maria

25:09

without Anna. And the

25:12

way that Anna talks about Maria

25:14

when she's being challenged on

25:17

taking her for granted and the

25:20

way that Erin says, we worked. Just

25:24

the amount of love and effort

25:27

and the fact that they fought both so hard

25:29

for each other. And Jesse, you

25:31

fucker in your strings. I

25:34

mean, Mike, God. As always, this fucker

25:36

in his strings. You're fucker in your

25:38

strings. Like

25:40

don't think because you're not an actor

25:42

that you didn't move me and

25:45

make me cry too. I'm not leaving you

25:47

on it. You moved us

25:49

very much. Yes, I'm sorry. I

25:52

hear your story about using samples and all that, Jesse, but

25:54

I am fully convinced you just rip the heartstrings straight out

25:56

of our audience and just play on those. Thank

25:58

you, thank you. But yes,

26:02

all of it has really made me happy cry and

26:04

sad cry, because all of you

26:06

are just so damn talented that it kills

26:09

me, but in the

26:11

good kind of killing, not the bad

26:13

kind of killing. Yeah, I felt genuinely

26:15

very moved by Sam and Anna breaking

26:17

through the water at the end, and

26:19

I think I also felt

26:21

that way because that was the last

26:23

recording that Van Winkle and Aaron did.

26:26

Simultaneously, they finished their journeys as these

26:29

characters at the same time with that

26:31

scene. So it was like,

26:33

okay, guys, third take, put anything

26:35

you want to into this final

26:37

take as Sam and Anna, and

26:39

it was just like, you

26:44

can feel how real that moment

26:47

of making it is. Yeah.

26:51

Oh, one more quick thing. I

26:53

just wanted to shout out to

26:55

James Kane, who doesn't get mentioned

26:57

enough, I feel, because he fucked

26:59

me up several times with his

27:01

performance. James is so underrated. So

27:03

underrated. Peter is an amazing character, and

27:05

I just think he did a really, really great job.

27:08

I just wanted to say that. Oh, yeah.

27:10

In chat, I think several times we were

27:12

like, Peter Best Boy, Peter

27:16

Best Husbando. Yeah. Yes.

27:19

He was really, really, really just super well done

27:21

all around. Great, great character. All

27:23

of his hopeful little cold opens at

27:25

the end. Mm-hmm. Ugh. Kills

27:29

me. As

27:31

far as the funniest memories of

27:34

recording and amusing bloopers go, that

27:37

takes me back to season one. Van

27:40

Winkle and I started off just

27:42

the two of us in

27:44

the beginning. I mean, literally, they

27:46

were writing scripts weekly, sending them over for

27:48

review. I was proofing

27:51

them, and then we were

27:53

recording Wednesday nights, and they would take two to

27:55

three hours to get through an episode, and

27:57

it was a very intense schedule. and

28:00

plagued by noise, just all

28:02

the background noise you could

28:04

possibly imagine. I

28:06

was recording in a one-bedroom apartment

28:09

in Los Angeles with my husband

28:11

on the couch in the living room trying to

28:13

be as quiet as he can while sitting in

28:16

100 degree heat because we couldn't have the air

28:18

conditioners on while the mic was hot. So

28:22

it was intense and

28:24

we were constantly plagued by airplanes

28:27

and helicopters. If you've ever been to

28:29

LA, there's not a moment that goes

28:32

by where there is not an active

28:34

helicopter. We were plagued

28:36

by leaf blowers

28:38

and lawnmowers and cars speeding

28:42

by. Just, I mean, anything you could possibly

28:44

think of. I did my absolute best to

28:47

soundproof the room as much as possible, but

28:50

I was not equipped at that time. And

28:53

I'd have to say the funniest

28:55

things that interrupted us were the

28:57

very, very scary ice cream truck

28:59

that would visit my neighborhood around

29:01

6 30 in the evening. I

29:03

mean, truly scary. This thing looked like it was

29:06

being held together by cardboard. And

29:08

I do believe it was the inspiration for the

29:10

ice cream truck episode. That

29:12

would interrupt us, but the funniest one was

29:14

definitely when we were interrupted by an earthquake.

29:19

Not a large earthquake, of course, but you

29:21

know, enough for the apartment to be shaking

29:23

and for us to be like, okay, holding

29:25

for earthquake. That

29:27

one was pretty funny. I

29:30

would say funniest moments of

29:32

recording. It's not so much a blooper,

29:34

but there was a point where we were recording and

29:37

we were talking about how

29:40

Maria would save characters' contacts

29:42

in her phone. And

29:45

I don't remember all of them. I did write

29:47

them down, but I think that

29:49

we decided that Sam would be something like

29:52

sad water boy. And

29:56

Kate would be not Anna. And I mean,

29:59

that's. I love that.

30:01

I love the concept of Maria just doing

30:03

a power move of she knows the names

30:06

probably But those are gonna be

30:08

her contact names and I'm here

30:10

for that. She's so fierce and I

30:12

love her As

30:15

far as whether I was genuinely

30:17

moved by any moments I've

30:20

been moved throughout this

30:22

experience personally Watching

30:25

us band together as a cast and a

30:27

team has been amazing The

30:30

accommodations that they've made

30:32

for me personally Because

30:34

my life changed so much throughout

30:37

this process between Moving

30:39

across the country getting pregnant having a

30:41

child first year of motherhood and so

30:44

on just all of that and the

30:47

support I got from this team was

30:50

genuinely moving but as far as

30:54

actual scripting

30:57

or recording

30:59

recorded moments the

31:02

last episode was hard to get through and

31:04

because this process has

31:07

been so fulfilling creatively and Community

31:10

wise and these are my friends

31:12

and I'm going to miss them

31:16

And I do miss them already But

31:19

yes saying goodbye to Emma's been hard and

31:22

I'm so grateful

31:24

for the experience and

31:27

the journey that we've been

31:29

on together as a team and a

31:32

Cast and so

31:34

yeah, there were tears there were definitely

31:37

tears There are

31:39

a lot of moments with Maria

31:41

that I was incredibly moved by

31:44

her passion her fierceness and

31:46

her Taking the

31:48

time to realize some things About

31:51

herself and her journey that

31:54

was big and it felt big to act.

31:56

I Really

31:58

really loved the episode where

32:00

she talks about her family's

32:02

journey to get to the States. It

32:05

was incredibly moving to

32:08

say these things I'd

32:11

never really vocalized about diaspora of

32:15

having that heritage, granted mine is

32:17

Mexican, but similar, you know, and

32:20

not ever knowing what

32:23

it would have been like to live there. I

32:26

don't think I'd ever really vocalized

32:28

it in that way before and

32:30

that was very powerful and

32:34

I am so grateful

32:36

to have been able to act in that episode.

32:39

And what was my most difficult moment

32:42

as an actor? I

32:45

could not tell you what episode it was. I know

32:47

it was in season two and I

32:50

know it involved Ami and I, Ami who

32:52

plays Maria. I

32:55

was probably four

32:57

months pregnant, maybe a little

32:59

further along. I was right

33:01

before I left California and

33:05

I had just had a

33:07

crazy long work day at

33:10

my full-time job and we

33:13

were going especially late with

33:15

recording and

33:18

I just struggled. I struggled getting there

33:20

with Anna that night, struggled

33:22

reaching the emotion that I needed to get

33:25

to, struggled forging that connection

33:27

between Anna and Maria. And

33:30

it just stands out to me because

33:32

after it was over I had some

33:34

contractions, so pretty early in

33:36

my pregnancy, which

33:38

by the way can happen. Didn't know that. Very,

33:41

very aware of it now, but yeah,

33:45

I had to like put my feet up and

33:48

drink a lot of water and I was

33:50

fine. But it was a rough

33:52

night recording, probably the roughest of all of

33:54

them, you know. Another

33:57

one actually that stands out was We

34:00

did a three-hour recording session with

34:02

a lot of monologue and

34:05

none of it was usable. And

34:07

that was a bummer. And so

34:09

about three weeks later we had to do it

34:12

all over again, which was fine. Not a huge

34:14

deal, but those technical things

34:16

can be disappointing sometimes. I

34:19

think my hardest episode to act

34:21

in was the one at

34:23

Haseida Head, where Maria

34:26

is pushed to the breaking point and she's

34:28

just breaking down. And

34:31

for me, I don't cry

34:34

easily. And

34:36

so to get into

34:38

a headspace where I could portray that

34:41

to the best of my ability was

34:44

a little bit intense. It was

34:46

definitely very emotional, but it was

34:48

also the direction of that was

34:50

handled so, so well. And

34:53

I definitely felt supported and

34:55

encouraged and I'm

34:57

really proud of that episode.

35:21

So let's break even more hearts right now while

35:24

we're on the trauma congo line. Congo

35:38

line, not congo line. I don't know how words

35:40

work. Ezra,

35:43

this is for you buddy. How

35:47

did you feel knowing that your character

35:49

would die with it being a sacrifice

35:51

for the greater good asks Janae. So

35:56

for most of the season, I

35:58

was fine. I

36:00

knew from quite

36:02

a while back, definitely before this

36:05

season started, Virginia and Van Winkle spoke to

36:07

me about it and they were like, hey, just so you know, this

36:09

is kind of gonna be Ned's character arc. And

36:12

it was fun because I was the only, but I

36:14

was like the only person who

36:16

knew who was gonna die. And

36:19

I was just walking around every day like, I've got

36:21

a secret. And

36:25

it didn't really start to hit

36:27

me until we started doing table reads.

36:31

And I, it hit me when

36:33

we were doing the

36:35

table read for

36:37

episode 100, which Ned is not

36:39

in, but I was filling in for somebody,

36:42

I think it was Chris. Yeah, for the

36:44

character of Rob, yeah. So spoilers for episode

36:46

100, Meredith. There

36:50

is a lot, there are moments where

36:52

Bill and Rob talk about Ned. And

36:55

getting to participate in that was kind of

36:57

surreal for me. And I was like, oh

36:59

my God, he's dead. Like, I'm

37:03

gonna die, die. So

37:06

that was when it was hard then, you

37:09

know? And so I was going

37:11

into that last recording block and

37:13

I was feeling so many things.

37:15

And I

37:18

don't think I've told anybody this. I did

37:20

a bad thing, you guys. I actually spoiled

37:22

what happens to Ned for my boyfriend who has

37:25

never listened to an episode of the Sheridan Tapes

37:27

and doesn't know anything about it. I couldn't take

37:29

it anymore. Because we were recording

37:31

episode 97, which

37:33

is where Ned

37:35

says goodbye to Bill and Rob basically.

37:39

I think. Yeah, before things get going. No, not,

37:41

it was 97, it was 97. I

37:44

don't remember. Yeah, 97 is when they head

37:47

into the city for the final battle and

37:49

they just had their moments together. And

37:52

I know it's gonna be their last

37:54

good moment together. I was fucking crying

37:56

after I was like, something bad is

37:58

gonna happen. So

38:02

it was hard for like those last couple of weeks.

38:05

Before that I was ballin', I was chillin'. I

38:08

knew something you guys didn't know. Yeah,

38:11

and how do you feel about it afterwards? I

38:14

feel great about it. I think that, I

38:16

think any other ending would have kind of felt like

38:19

a disservice to the character to be honest. Yeah, I

38:21

get that. Then what

38:23

does he do? Just like creep around forever,

38:25

just like be weird and

38:28

Bill and Rob in his house forever. Is

38:31

there a satisfying ending? Or

38:33

is he just vibing until the people he

38:35

love die? And then what

38:38

else would there be? So I'm very happy

38:40

with it. Yeah, I feel like he was

38:43

starting to, like at the

38:45

same time realizing he was in real

38:48

love, realizing that he was

38:50

also very bored and tired. Yeah.

38:54

And there was like something really

38:56

exciting about him being able to

38:58

sacrifice himself for the people that

39:00

he loved. So it was, yeah,

39:02

literally the last thing on his bucket list. Jesse

39:06

Hagen, I have to ask you, what

39:10

were you thinking about when you were

39:12

composing that Ned's theme because it breaks

39:14

my heart. I can't decide if the

39:16

Caldwell theme or the Ned theme is

39:19

my favorite for this season, but please

39:21

just talk about your music. I would love to hear

39:24

you talk about that. I appreciate you asking that. It's

39:26

funny that you say Caldwell and Ned because those are

39:28

my two favorite themes from the season as well. Yeah.

39:31

And they, I think it's, so Ezra, sorry

39:33

to burst your well, but I also knew you

39:35

were gonna die. Well, I have, I

39:38

would hope so. So

39:41

yeah, and I knew that Caldwell was

39:43

too. This is spoiler central. So

39:46

I think that's probably why those two themes

39:48

kind of were what

39:50

they were. Caldwell, we actually did

39:53

two versions of that. So I didn't get that quite right. But

39:56

for the Ned theme specifically, I don't know.

39:58

I think. I

40:00

think that I had fallen in love with

40:02

the character like everyone else just experiencing the

40:04

show because like I've mentioned in the past,

40:07

I don't score these episodes scene by scene,

40:10

I just write music and then Van Winkle

40:12

lays them throughout. And

40:15

so I sort of just experienced the show almost

40:17

like anyone else. And

40:19

I had started

40:21

unsure about Ned and definitely fall in love

40:23

with Ned by the end. And so,

40:25

honestly, this is gonna sound so cheesy, but

40:28

like it was sort of,

40:30

that cue was sort of like my love

40:32

letter to the character and sort of like

40:34

a farewell. And

40:36

it felt very personal, which is like, you know, it's not,

40:39

I don't, there's not a lot of, not

40:41

every character I wrote a theme for in the show. I

40:44

think Ned and Sam are probably the two that like I

40:47

really felt like I sort of wrote a love letter too.

40:51

And so yeah, that's sort of what

40:53

was going through. But yeah, I obviously

40:55

knew where the story was going and

40:59

it was imagining that moment when I

41:01

wrote that for sure. And

41:04

Cello, I'm pretty sure Van Winkle specifically

41:06

asked for Cello, which is just, you

41:08

can't go wrong with Cello. So. Yeah,

41:10

you really can't. Yeah, Cello is the

41:13

sexiest and saddest in my life. That's

41:15

right, it's so true. I feel like,

41:17

like, sexy. It's moving in every way.

41:19

Sexy and sad is basically Ned, like

41:21

no wonder this. That is

41:24

so right. Yeah, no wonder Sheridan Tapes does

41:26

so well on Tumblr. Sexy.

41:30

Oh, okay, if we're gonna categorize

41:32

Ned as sexy and sad, then

41:34

he would kill careless whispers at

41:36

karaoke. There you go, there

41:38

you go. Yes, and I just wanna

41:40

add, I play saxophone. So like, oh

41:43

my god, like just imagine a, you

41:46

know, a giant cosmic horror

41:48

stepping out with a saxophone and

41:51

big glowing red eyes. I

41:53

don't know why I wasn't asked to write that cue because that

41:55

would have been fun. Okay,

41:58

just start the show over. doing all

42:00

saxophone. To the porch. To

42:03

the porch. Remakes

42:05

Sharon Tapes from episode one, changing

42:09

nothing but. Saxophone. There's

42:12

like a lot of saxophone in the second round. Yeah.

42:16

It's like very heavily noir all of a

42:18

sudden. It just leaves the

42:20

audience going, what a saxophone, wow. It's

42:25

incredible. In fairness, I never said I was good. Even

42:31

better. Next question before we

42:33

take a short break. Van

42:35

Winkle in Virginia, this is for you. It's

42:38

a two part question from Fay, and

42:40

they want to know part one, what's

42:43

some advice you would give to a writer and

42:45

actor who wants to get into this sort of

42:47

thing, but is too afraid? How

42:49

did you motivate yourselves? And part two

42:51

is what kinds of media did you

42:53

draw inspiration from when writing episodes? Yeah.

42:58

In terms of getting started, I

43:02

have a hard time answering this question because

43:05

more often than not, I just start projects

43:07

because no one can stop me. That

43:11

is such a good answer actually. I

43:14

don't know. I've just always, I've always

43:16

wanted to tell stories. I've always been like,

43:19

I don't know why. I'm

43:21

a very anxious person, like

43:24

generally speaking about most things,

43:26

particularly being perceived in social

43:28

environments. But for some reason,

43:31

I've just never had that issue with putting

43:33

my work out there for people, probably

43:36

because I spent a large

43:38

part of my adolescence into my young

43:40

adult life, making

43:42

things, like writing things,

43:44

producing films that nobody

43:47

saw, that did not

43:49

find an audience and just kind of

43:52

sit there on whatever

43:54

platform and just like, I'm, you know, I'm mostly

43:56

happy with what I made. I mostly kind of

43:58

made it for myself. Um, it would

44:00

have been nice if it had found an audience and,

44:02

you know, I had made somebody doing it, but like, whatever,

44:05

you know, set it down, move on

44:07

to the next thing, you know, it was best, I

44:09

said, again, depending on, you know, how the thing ended

44:11

and like any fallout from that, but like,

44:15

I don't know, like best

44:17

advice I can give is start

44:20

like small, start limited with like,

44:22

you know, a good

44:25

perspective on what your assets

44:27

are as a creator, like the tools you

44:29

have access to the people, you know, who

44:31

you can work with, um, you know, what

44:33

you have available to you and, you know,

44:37

start with a project, you know, you can at

44:39

least, you know, get a solid start on and,

44:41

you know, if not finish and, you know, just

44:43

try it and put it out there, see if

44:45

it resonates with people have not been fine, just,

44:48

you know, put it down, try

44:50

something different, take what you learned from that and,

44:52

you know, keep going. Um,

44:55

but in terms of getting over those initial

44:57

nerves, um, I, um,

44:59

I don't really think I can

45:01

help with that, but just, I

45:04

relate to that, like the fear and I

45:06

think what helped for me is, um, well,

45:09

one, like working with you as a creative

45:11

partner, like you do just have that incredible

45:14

fire and drive. So I

45:16

feel like I came in more often with like

45:19

a little bit of an edit button to

45:21

either on the practical side or like, I

45:23

mean, usually it was on the practical side,

45:25

let's be honest, telling me to just tone

45:28

it to slow down, like, um,

45:31

but then like there was

45:33

so much ideas to work with

45:35

there that it was really easy to fall in

45:37

love with the story that was being told. And

45:39

that's what helped me sort of get

45:41

past the fear is just being so

45:44

in love and excited with what

45:46

was happening. I think getting to talk

45:48

things out with you as often as we

45:50

did really helped as well. Like that, I

45:52

felt like we were so, um,

45:54

on the same page, working on the

45:57

Sheridan tapes with like what we wanted

45:59

out of it. and how we wanted it

46:01

to grow. So if

46:04

that applies to you in your journey as a writer

46:06

and actor, if you have someone that really

46:08

is ready to be at the same level of

46:11

commitment that you are, that's a super

46:13

fun way to get into it. And

46:16

I think just

46:19

making stuff helps that fear

46:21

dissolve. And Van Winkle started

46:24

with an anthology. I think personally, that's

46:26

a really great way to start with

46:28

fiction podcasting specifically, if that's what you

46:31

want to do. Because literally, it's like

46:33

a one time thing that

46:35

you try out. You see what you like and

46:37

what you didn't like, and you can change things

46:39

the next time you do it. And it's super

46:41

low commitment. So I would recommend anthologies to get

46:43

started. And it

46:45

lets you try out a bunch of different things and find

46:48

out what kinds of stories you like telling,

46:50

what kinds of stories you're good at telling, and

46:54

where your strengths lie as a creator in the

46:57

specific medium you're trying to create in. Being

47:00

able to try a bunch of different things, throw

47:02

a bunch of shit at the wall, and see

47:05

what sticks. And just do your

47:08

best not to take it personally. If, one,

47:10

it doesn't find an audience,

47:12

or two, if the

47:14

audience it does find is a

47:16

little harsh about any technical

47:19

or creative shortcomings, I am giving

47:22

our Apple podcast reviews the

47:24

most bombastic side eye right now.

47:28

That happens. I mean, I think, especially

47:30

with the visibility our show has gotten,

47:32

it was inevitably going to find people

47:35

that it wasn't quite the right audience

47:37

for. And that's

47:39

just part of it. And

47:41

there's also been a lot of people who are like,

47:43

holy shit, where did this come from?

47:45

I love this so much. So yeah,

47:48

don't let anybody nay say

47:50

you out of it. If

47:52

you are a person writing something that you love,

47:55

there are other people out there in the world

47:57

who will also love it. And yeah.

48:02

What kinds of media do you draw inspiration from? I

48:05

guess, hmm, that's

48:08

an interesting question. I

48:10

mean, we've name dropped it several times, but

48:13

Doctor Who is always a big

48:15

inspiration for

48:18

me, mostly

48:21

in how powerful that premise is for telling a

48:23

lot of different stories and

48:27

the willingness to get

48:29

a bit out there conceptually. And

48:33

then also, it mentioned as well, Magnus Archives,

48:36

huge inspiration at the beginning of

48:38

the show and a lot

48:41

of that show's DNA is in

48:43

the Sheridan Tapes. Yep. I

48:45

started getting really inspired by Mike

48:47

Flanagan's work, maybe halfway through writing

48:50

the show and the

48:52

way that he writes the most devastatingly

48:54

beautiful monologues in the midst of horror.

48:59

So yeah, I hope to continue emulating

49:01

that. All right.

49:03

Well, this has been a pretty

49:07

heavy session of talking, so

49:09

let's take a really short

49:11

break for us to

49:13

kind of regroup, rehydrate, and

49:16

so our wonderful listeners can

49:18

hear a word from our

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sponsors. Talmor

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San Francisco was rocked by a

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