0:00

Hey, Prime members, you can listen to The Vanished

0:02

ad-free on Amazon Music. Download

0:05

the app today.

0:13

Has

0:20

this caused a division? Not

0:23

within this family. I can't

0:25

speak to anybody else, but

0:27

it's not really anybody else's responsibility

0:30

or their business, now is it? We're

0:32

the responsible ones who are taking care of our child.

0:35

They broke up, remember?

0:37

It's very, very

0:39

harming to, you know, just not

0:41

only my mental health, but just to

0:43

have an invalidation of

0:47

somebody who loved me and I loved them so incredibly

0:49

much is extremely hurtful. And

0:52

we'll leave it at that, I guess. I don't want

0:54

to attack the family.

0:56

If he's dead, we'll

0:58

be turning over his grave. That

1:01

this has come down the way it has

1:03

come down. I mean, he would be, he

1:05

would just be outraged. The

1:08

goal is bringing home this, this

1:10

loved one that's missing. You know, we just have

1:12

to all be on the same page. And

1:15

I think really, it's only

1:17

takes a couple of steps. It only takes

1:19

a couple of emotional steps for people to

1:22

get back to that place. And

1:24

that's what I'm hoping for

1:26

out of all this. I really hope

1:28

that everybody who loves Beau,

1:30

and clearly there are a lot of people that really

1:32

love him, that they're able to get

1:34

some answers and find some resolution and

1:37

comfort in each other for their

1:39

shared love of this

1:41

wonderful guy.

1:44

Over the past two weeks, you learned about Beau

1:46

Mann, how he disappeared, and a little

1:48

bit about the divide that has developed since that

1:51

time. This week, we're taking a closer

1:53

look at the divide. How did this happen

1:56

and why? And how can we overcome

1:58

this and come together to push for answers?

1:59

answers for Beau. At the center of this

2:02

story is a bright, successful man who

2:04

disappeared during the prime of his life. As

2:07

we were speaking with those who knew Beau, it felt

2:09

like this divide was muddying the waters. It

2:12

was making it difficult to figure out which facts

2:14

were important. Why was the focus on

2:16

his relationship with his fiancé, who

2:18

was more than 2,000 miles away when Beau mysteriously

2:21

vanished? This week we will take you

2:23

along our journey as we looked for answers.

2:26

I'm Marissa and from Wondery, this is episode 392.

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and be sure to select our show in

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the drop-down menu that follows. We're

3:52

working on this show for more than seven years

3:54

and creating nearly 400 episodes. We've

3:57

seen plenty of division in many of the cases

3:59

that we've seen.

3:59

have covered. It happens. Often

4:02

it's due to suspicion that someone close to

4:04

the missing person could be involved, usually

4:07

a significant other. And

4:08

we know that statistically, stranger abductions

4:11

are very rare. You're much more likely

4:13

to be harmed by someone you know, and intimate

4:15

partner violence is very common.

4:18

When we began conducting interviews about

4:20

Bowe's disappearance, people kept bringing

4:22

up Bowe's relationship with Jason, trying

4:24

to prove that they were broken up.

4:26

We initially thought that they were attempting to build a

4:28

case to prove that Jason was involved somehow.

4:31

And a few people did make that claim. We

4:34

won't be airing what they said, because those

4:36

accusations have no basis in fact.

4:39

They seem to be more like conspiracy theories

4:41

or plots from a suspenseful movie.

4:43

Since we know that Jason was in Michigan when Bowe

4:45

disappeared, he was in the hospital with his

4:48

mother who was gravely ill, we decided

4:50

not to air those accusations because they

4:52

only served to cause further harm and division.

4:55

The reason we are sharing this with you, so that

4:57

you understand what has been going on behind the

4:59

scenes and why people feel the way that they do.

5:02

One thing that we struggled with while creating

5:04

this series, was that we always do our

5:07

best to honor the privacy and challenges

5:09

that every family we work with faces.

5:11

But in this case, this divide was significantly

5:14

affecting our ability to tell Bowe's

5:16

story. One reason that we try

5:18

to show multiple perspectives in the stories

5:20

that we cover, is that not everyone always

5:23

agrees on the events that have occurred. They

5:25

may have different perspectives, and sometimes

5:27

those perspectives are important.

5:29

They can change our view of what was going on

5:32

when a person disappeared. We also

5:34

find that sometimes people tell their friends, family

5:36

and partners different things, or

5:38

show them different versions of themselves.

5:41

When we combine those viewpoints, a clearer

5:43

picture begins to emerge. But

5:45

as we were talking to people about Bowe, it

5:48

seemed that everyone was in two or three steps,

5:50

Team Amy, Team Jason, or attempting

5:53

to remain

5:53

neutral. When we started to

5:55

get to the bottom of this aspect of the case,

5:58

we couldn't find any clear evidence that Jason

6:00

had ever done anything wrong. It

6:02

seemed as though members of Beau's family just didn't

6:05

like him, or maybe for some reason

6:07

didn't like him now. Here's Beau's

6:09

brother, Ben. I've

6:11

just been skeptical of Jason this whole time, and

6:13

he's like a little media attention

6:16

whore too. The first time I met Jason,

6:19

my initial take on him, or after

6:22

I got to know him really, is he

6:24

seemed very, like

6:26

he thrived on attention. He was very flamboyant

6:28

and thrived on attention. He wasn't like

6:31

my cup of tea. I was very cordial

6:33

to him, but he's not the type

6:35

of person that I really associate

6:37

with. So

6:38

my whole family loved the boyfriend that

6:41

still worked for Beau's company.

6:43

He just had a better personality,

6:46

and he was a more genuine

6:48

person, I think. But he complained that, yo,

6:50

Nick was abusive and this and that.

6:52

I liked Nick. The boyfriend that

6:54

Beau had prior to Jason, I

6:57

felt was a lot more genuine.

7:00

And I felt that I connected with the

7:02

prior boyfriend better than Jason, just because

7:04

Jason had a, you

7:07

know, different personality.

7:09

It seemed strange to us that Ben would mention how

7:11

much he liked Beau's ex, despite the

7:13

fact that Beau had said he was abusive.

7:15

No one ever said anything like that about Jason.

7:18

This all felt kind of unfair.

7:20

There was also a suggestion that Jason was using

7:23

Beau's disappearance to become a TikTok influencer.

7:26

Here's Amy.

7:28

I don't like talking bad about people, but the thing

7:30

is, his big thing is

7:32

I'm told, because I'm not on there, but I'm

7:34

told by other people that he's

7:37

really excited that he's now a TikTok

7:39

influencer. Oh, he thinks he

7:41

runs the world, my opinion.

7:44

And I'm just a little girl from West Texas, although

7:46

I did go to college and get a degree in accounting, but I'm

7:48

just a little girl from Texas. He

7:51

seems very pretentious.

7:54

He like wants to be, you

7:56

know, rich and famous. He wants to run

7:58

with all the rich and famous people.

8:00

He's all about image.

8:03

It is true that Jason has harnessed the power

8:05

of social media to spread the word about Beau's

8:07

disappearance. And he does have a TikTok

8:10

account with over 84,000 followers. But

8:13

Jason told us that not only did he utilize

8:15

the popularity of TikTok to help find Beau,

8:18

but also to carry on Beau's legacy.

8:21

I'm not ready to go out and have a life. Everyone's like, oh, you

8:23

need to move on. No I don't because

8:25

Beau would be horrified. He would never be okay

8:28

with that. And if it were the other way around,

8:30

he would be looking for me. And so I am when

8:32

people say, well, why don't you have a move on? To me,

8:34

when I hear that, I hear that all the time from people,

8:36

especially on social media. And

8:39

I know their heart's in the right place, but it's like, you

8:41

guys, clearly that tells me you don't know

8:43

what I'm going through or what someone in a situation

8:46

like this is going through. You don't just

8:48

move on. I mean, what if someone did that to you? And

8:50

so it's been very, very troubling. But that's

8:52

why like the TikTok account I've tried to

8:55

honor Beau, because we were always

8:57

trying to find ways that we could positively impact

8:59

social change on social issues, which are

9:02

marginalized communities for the most part. And

9:04

so I've made it all about that. I've really, really tried.

9:06

If Beau came back right now, I

9:08

promised you he would be so happy and impressed

9:10

with the work that I've done that he could help continue on

9:13

with me. And so I'm doing it a lot

9:15

of that I'm doing because I know that Beau would

9:17

be so incredibly proud. And so

9:19

I've been growing the TikTok channel because Beau

9:21

would want me to. He would want me to continue

9:24

what we were trying to do. We

9:26

wanted to change the world. Covering

9:29

these cases is like a journey. And sometimes

9:32

the way we see a person or case evolves

9:34

as we speak to more and more people in the circle.

9:37

The deeper we got, the more petty this all

9:39

seemed. Should someone be criticized

9:41

for using social media to spread awareness?

9:44

We kept asking ourselves, why does this

9:46

divide exist? While speaking

9:48

with Beau's friend Brett, we thought just

9:50

maybe we were getting somewhere.

9:52

I really feel the boyfriend, the fiancé, is just that.

9:58

And she doesn't like him. seems

10:00

like a person that loved Bo and that they were

10:02

going to get married and they

10:04

just don't like each other. So you can see

10:06

the groups, they just battle

10:08

back and forth. So she

10:10

might not be doing it intentionally or out of malice,

10:13

but it's something that really, really,

10:16

you know, really creates different tangents

10:18

that creates more obstacles than there

10:21

need to be. So it's unfortunate,

10:23

but it's a part of this case

10:25

is some of the family feuds that are involved.

10:28

You know, some things are just kind of being left

10:30

out a little bit by omission.

10:33

Brett had mentioned some omissions in

10:35

what has been released previously about Bo's

10:37

life and disappearance. We had

10:39

seen mentions in the different Facebook groups that

10:42

Bo had relapsed or could have relapsed

10:44

before he disappeared. And that was being

10:46

kept out of the narrative. During our

10:48

first interview with Amy, we asked her if

10:50

she believed that Bo could have relapsed and

10:52

this is what she said.

10:55

I personally

10:57

don't want to think that he had a relapse.

10:59

Just that's what a mom does. Right.

11:03

During our follow up interview, we addressed this once

11:05

again and Amy seemed more open

11:07

to this idea and explained that she

11:09

didn't want Bo to be stigmatized over

11:11

the idea of a possible relapse to take away

11:13

from all of the good that Bo was done for the sober

11:16

community.

11:17

Do I think it's possible that Bo relapsed?

11:20

I really would rather not believe he has,

11:24

but a staggering 40 to 60

11:27

percent of people who

11:30

are sober will experience

11:32

a relapse.

11:33

And so that was

11:36

the statistic that I had read. It

11:38

could be more than that for all I know. But

11:41

what I'm just trying to say is I really would rather

11:43

believe he didn't. You know what?

11:45

People are human. I mean, people

11:48

are human. They make mistakes. Things

11:50

happen. Life happens. I

11:53

do not want Bo to be portrayed in a negative

11:56

light because overall he has

11:58

done a lot.

11:59

of good work in his life. And

12:02

even if he may have relapsed, it

12:04

could have maybe cost his demise. I

12:07

don't know. But he's also my son.

12:09

He's a human being and he has done

12:12

so much good in his life. But

12:14

I mean, the social stigma is still out there,

12:16

which is one of the things he was

12:18

trying to change. He's

12:21

just done so much good in his life and

12:23

his business has helped so many people. I just

12:26

want to make sure that he's betrayed in

12:29

a good light because he's

12:32

a good soul and a good son. It seemed

12:35

as though there was some gatekeeping of information to

12:37

protect Bo's reputation. If

12:40

Bo were to show back up tomorrow, no one

12:42

wanted to air his dirty laundry or put information

12:44

out there that would be upsetting to him.

12:46

We thought that maybe this was the cause of the

12:48

divide. But when we spoke to Jason,

12:51

he seemed to agree with Amy to an extent

12:53

and also wanted to protect Bo's name. The thing

12:57

that sort of concerns me the most about

12:59

Bo's disappearance and all the subsequent

13:01

stuff that's coming out and everything is I

13:03

feel like there's this underlying thing that oh

13:06

my God, he relapsed or he was this drug addict.

13:08

And that's not true. Bo

13:10

may have relapsed. He may have. I

13:12

mean, I don't know. I mean, I was not there.

13:14

But based on what I

13:16

saw on that footage, I believe

13:18

it's a strong possibility. But I will tell you that

13:20

the last thing I would want is Bo's image

13:22

to be made by viewers to think that he was

13:24

like, you know, relapsing all the time. That's not Bo

13:27

at all. I mean, I can tell you that he was so

13:29

proud of his sobriety and he was

13:31

so proud of pointing to AA meetings with me.

13:33

We went to hundreds of them, hundreds all around

13:35

the country.

13:36

He may have slipped. I'm not naive. I mean, it could have

13:38

happened. And I was concerned about that, to

13:41

be honest with you. But I don't want people to just

13:43

assume that this guy was so

13:45

troubled by his addiction that he was constantly

13:47

slipping. That's not accurate. I wouldn't say that's

13:50

accurate.

13:50

And so I just I want to make

13:53

sure that's clear that I don't want

13:55

the last last week of November

13:57

or first week of December, whatever that is to.

13:59

paint a picture of Beau that's not true. Beau,

14:02

I mean, he had slips. There's no doubt about

14:04

that. I'm not trying to paint a picture. He never had a slip.

14:07

But I just, my fear is that

14:09

people are going to misread this and act

14:11

as if like, oh, wow, you know, he was a druggy or

14:13

he was, it's not true. Beau took

14:16

his sobriety very seriously. And anytime

14:18

I ever felt that there was an issue

14:20

that could make him potentially have a relapse,

14:23

he would get treatment or he would be proactive about

14:25

it. I took him to treatment before. I mean, Beau was very,

14:28

determined and very consistent

14:30

with trying to continue a very sober life from

14:32

recovery. And so when we did have slips, which,

14:34

you know, it happened, but it was

14:37

not like what I think people are necessarily

14:39

painting this picture of about Beau.

14:41

It just didn't seem like this was the reason that

14:44

Beau's loved ones had developed different camps

14:46

and struggled to work together toward the common goal

14:48

of finding Beau.

14:50

While we have seen division in other cases,

14:52

it usually isn't this murky. It's

14:54

generally more black and white. But this

14:57

began to make more sense when we looked at another

14:59

aspect of this case. What has happened

15:01

since Beau disappeared?

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17:32

When someone passes away, their loved ones

17:35

are left behind to tie up all of the loose ends.

17:38

This can be very basic stuff like closing

17:40

out utility accounts or paying bills that

17:42

are due. And other times it's more

17:44

complex.

17:45

In that circumstance, you have a death certificate

17:47

to prove that the person is gone. In

17:50

the case of a missing person, this

17:52

is much more complicated. After

17:54

Bo disappeared, his stepfather filed

17:56

to become the conservator of Bo's estate.

18:00

could be taken care of.

18:01

This is something that people have to do in these

18:03

instances. But it's not something that's

18:06

often spoken about. When Bowe's stepfather

18:08

filed paperwork with the court to become conservator,

18:11

he included facts about Bowe's disappearance

18:13

and the work they have done to find him

18:15

in order to prove to the court that there was a need for a

18:18

conservatorship.

18:19

They also outlined Bowe's assets that they

18:21

needed to keep in order, including his apartment,

18:24

vehicle, bank accounts, and stock in Sobergrid.

18:27

We asked Amy to explain how this all came

18:29

about. In this clip that we're about to play

18:31

for you, she mentions a woman named

18:34

Sandy. For context, Sandy

18:36

is a woman that Bowe was friends with for many years.

18:39

They had a very close relationship, and we were

18:41

told by many people that Bowe referred to Sandy

18:44

as his godmother. We

18:45

will delve deeper into this relationship

18:47

in a bit, but for now, this is what

18:49

Amy told us about the conservatorship.

18:52

The whole thing started out

18:54

purely

18:56

because I wanted to preserve Bowe's

18:58

credit.

18:59

I knew he slowed a year or whatever on the car.

19:01

He was proud of his credit.

19:03

I wanted to preserve it. So I thought, okay,

19:06

you know, Sandy said, well, if he's gone

19:09

out and relapsed, you know, he deserves

19:11

to get what he gets. So take his Porsche down

19:13

to the Porsche dealer, park it on the lot,

19:16

and leave it there. And

19:17

I said, no, she wasn't

19:19

his godmother, honey. I grew up

19:21

in Texas, and I'm not Catholic.

19:24

My children did not have a godmother

19:26

or a godfather. She

19:28

made that sit up on her own. But

19:30

anyway, so she had said, go down and park

19:32

it. And I said, no, you know, Bowe's worked hard to have

19:35

good credit. I don't want it to get ruined. I

19:37

don't know where he's at. I don't know what's happened. He could

19:39

be dead. I'm taking the car and I'm

19:41

going to pay it off.

19:42

Well, I didn't know that I couldn't just

19:44

do that. So they said I had to get a conservatorship.

19:48

So that was the whole reason to begin

19:50

with. He had some financial obligations

19:53

that we as his family needed to take

19:55

care of for him. It's just us being

19:58

parents, but we ended up... up

20:00

having to step into sober grid

20:02

to preserve what Bo's

20:05

wishes were and what he wanted. And

20:08

that was an entirely different

20:10

nightmare on top of the nightmare

20:12

I already had about my child missing.

20:14

I had to fight them and I

20:16

had to wipe out my freaking retirement account

20:19

with lawyer fees to fight

20:21

them. We decided

20:23

to pull court records for this conservatorship

20:26

case and see what we could find there.

20:29

These are public records. Jason

20:31

was removed as an advisor to the board

20:33

at sober grid and two people Bo

20:35

had appointed, Sandy and a man named

20:38

Ed, were also removed from the

20:40

board. Jason wants to make it clear

20:42

that he's not seeking any of Bo's money.

20:45

However, Jason and Sandy felt as

20:47

though Bo's wishes weren't being carried out

20:50

and objected to the conservatorship.

20:52

We wanted to hear from Sandy about all of this

20:55

and we had interviews scheduled with her but

20:57

unfortunately she had to cancel as she was recovering

21:00

from an illness. So as we began

21:02

producing this episode, we had to rely

21:04

upon court records.

21:06

As this all began, Sandy objected

21:08

to David being named as the conservator and

21:11

she stated that she's a co-founder, shareholder

21:14

and member of the board of directors of sober grid. She

21:17

went on to say that Bo had the right to name two

21:19

directors to the board, one of which was

21:21

himself until May 28th, 2020.

21:24

When Bo decided to step down and named

21:26

Sandy in his place, as he had

21:28

trusted her implicitly to carry out his wishes,

21:31

which she said she has done and is currently doing,

21:34

the

21:34

other director that Bo had appointed was a man

21:36

named Ed, who had been on the board since 2016.

21:41

Sandy went on to say the following, important

21:43

to note is that David Mann exercised

21:45

what he thought he had the authority to do by

21:47

changing the composition of the board, getting

21:50

rid of Sandy and Ed, appointing

21:52

himself and his daughter,

21:53

then asked for permission from the court to do so

21:56

by submitting a supplemental petition. She

21:59

later made the accusation

21:59

that the family was being manipulated by someone

22:02

within the company who she claims was

22:04

not forthcoming with information about financial

22:06

dealings.

22:07

She said that both she and Ed were long-term

22:10

friends of Beau with extensive

22:12

business experience who guided him as

22:14

he developed the company.

22:15

She had helped him find seed investors to get

22:17

the company off the ground

22:19

and continued to guide and mentor him. Sandy

22:22

included Beau's letter of resignation from

22:24

the board that he wrote in 2020, which

22:27

states, I am writing to provide written

22:29

notification that I hereby resign from the

22:31

board of directors of Sobergrid,

22:33

and I hereby appoint Sandra to the board

22:35

of directors to fill the aforementioned common

22:38

director seat. Sandra has significant

22:40

board experience and has served on boards

22:42

for over 30 years. She is a

22:45

private investor in companies within multiple

22:47

industries

22:48

where she has funded numerous ventures for over 40

22:50

years. Sandra was co-founder

22:52

of Chem Oil in 1973

22:55

and was intricately involved in its daily operations,

22:58

financial oversight, legal matters, hiring

23:00

slash firing of employees, and remains

23:03

as the president of the organization. Sandra

23:05

has been actively involved with serving

23:07

the mental health community for over 25 years and truly

23:10

understands the community that Sobergrid serves.

23:13

Her compassion and experience helping

23:15

serve those with mental health matters allows

23:18

her to effectively have a fundamental understanding

23:20

of the basis of the company.

23:22

Jason filed an objection as well.

23:25

Jason said that he was Beau's domestic partner,

23:28

advisor to the board of directors, and prior

23:30

employee of Sobergrid.

23:32

He went on to discuss his relationship with Beau

23:34

and efforts he put forth to try to find

23:36

him. Then he mentioned that before

23:38

Beau had removed himself from the board and added

23:41

Sandy in his place, they had lengthy

23:43

discussions over the stress he was experiencing

23:46

and who Beau thought would be best to replace him.

23:48

It says, quote, he told me his family was

23:50

not in consideration and

23:52

that he had narrowed it down to Sandy for

23:54

her successful business venture and experience

23:57

of successfully making millions of dollars before

23:59

she was 13.

23:59

30 years old.

24:01

Her trust she proved to him, her

24:03

ability and proven track record of introducing

24:05

Beau to wealthy investors to help grow sober

24:07

grid, and someone who understood addiction.

24:10

Jason expressed concerns that he had not been

24:12

made aware of the conservatorship and

24:14

the fact that Sandy and Ed had been removed from

24:17

the board.

24:18

Jason made multiple points to defend

24:20

his relationship with Beau.

24:22

He stated that he was Beau's authorized HIPAA

24:24

contact slash patient advocate for

24:26

almost the entire length of their relationship.

24:28

They listed one another as beneficiaries

24:31

on bank accounts, were planning to marry

24:33

in the summer of 2022, and

24:35

were working with a realtor to purchase a home

24:37

in Palm Beach, Florida, and so on. Jason

24:40

also stated that Beau looked at Sandy as a surrogate

24:42

mother because she was always there for him,

24:45

took him in, and helped him get into recovery.

24:48

He also mentioned a time when Beau had relapsed

24:50

in 2019 when they were in San

24:52

Francisco together and that he had reached

24:55

out to Beau's parents and he said they were unwilling

24:57

to help. In a response to these

24:59

objections, David Mann's attorney

25:02

said the following, The real issue,

25:04

who was best suited to act in Beau's best interest,

25:07

Objector is Beau's father and enjoyed a close

25:10

father-son relationship with him until his disappearance.

25:13

Objector is in the best position to know of Beau's wishes

25:16

and to act in accordance with Beau's best interests.

25:19

Sandra shares no familial relation to

25:21

Beau. She is an outsider and

25:24

at most a friend and colleague. Jason

25:26

is Beau's former fiancé. Objector

25:29

is informed and believes that shortly before Thanksgiving 2021,

25:31

Beau traveled to

25:33

Michigan where Jason lives

25:35

and broke off their engagement. Objector

25:38

is informed and believes that Beau then traveled to

25:40

Texas to attend Thanksgiving celebrations

25:42

with several of his siblings and other family

25:45

members

25:45

and told them he had traveled to Michigan and broke

25:48

off his engagement to Jason. Additionally,

25:50

Beau told Objector that he believed his relationship

25:53

with Jason was bad for his sobriety. This

25:56

is borne out by Jason's previously submitted

25:58

objection, wherein he

25:59

states that Bowe relapsed in 2019

26:02

while with Jason in San Francisco. We

26:04

reviewed hundreds of pages of court documents,

26:07

and there was a lot of back and forth. But

26:09

we wanted to share some of this with you, because

26:12

it's the one place where this division seems

26:14

to make sense. This push to prove

26:16

that there was a breakup only makes sense in the context

26:19

of this court battle. And all of this

26:21

back and forth has just made everything else

26:24

murky. When we spoke with Jason,

26:26

he told us what he felt comfortable sharing with

26:28

the public. She took

26:30

Ed off the board. She took Sandy off the board. She got

26:32

me let go. Right after Bowe disappeared,

26:35

my email at Sobergrib was shut down. I

26:37

can't access any of it. And then they

26:39

said I never worked for Sobergrib. But let me tell you why.

26:41

I worked for Sobergrib for a year, and

26:44

I worked every single day over 40 hours

26:46

a week. And I have evidence of it. But guess what?

26:48

It's all my email at Sobergrib, which I told the court,

26:50

subpoena, my calendar, I

26:53

didn't have to take a salary. So I could help both

26:55

because Sobergrib didn't have the money to pay all those people

26:57

all those salaries. So I said, Bo, I

27:00

will work as a teacher and make enough money

27:02

just to make ends meet on my end, because I don't

27:04

need like a lot of money. And he said,

27:06

that would be so wonderful if you would do that for me. I said,

27:09

Absolutely. And so that's why

27:11

I was never on the sober grid payroll. So they're trying

27:13

to say he never worked here. Well, how dare them? It's

27:15

because I did it so that Bo wouldn't have to

27:17

pay me a salary. So they could get paid.

27:19

And I have evidence of it, which I did share with the judge.

27:22

I sent the judge and the lawyer an email

27:25

that outlined all of this and said, just subpoena

27:27

my records. Isn't it interesting how they shut down my account,

27:29

you can get my calendar, you can look at all the dates every

27:32

single week on my meetings. I mean, it's disgusting

27:34

what they did to me, please understand. That's

27:37

why I'm so hurt because in the court

27:39

of public opinion, the spouse always

27:41

has looked at first on the fiance, I

27:43

took advantage of her son, she said. And

27:46

then she said he broke up with me. I

27:48

never heard that before. In fact, when Amy published

27:50

an article, the first thing that I said on the text

27:52

chain for the fine vote text chain was

27:55

Amy, I wasn't aware that Bo broke up with me. And I

27:57

certainly wasn't aware I was taking advantage of Bo

27:59

because I was self-sufficient and

28:01

I made my own money. I was very concerned

28:03

about that. And she told me I was overthinking it and it wasn't

28:05

about me. But now I understand

28:08

from months into this why

28:10

that narrative was created and

28:12

that's evidenced by things that have taken place.

28:15

And they know I have never harmed their son. Amy

28:17

knows I've never harmed Bo. She knows I would

28:19

never harm Bo. I was always on good terms

28:22

with them the entire time up until this happened.

28:25

In the court documents, Sandy was referred to

28:27

as an outsider and Jason as a former

28:29

fiance. They both contested

28:32

these labels. Sandy said she knew

28:34

Bo his entire adult life and looked

28:36

at him as an adopted son and was always

28:38

there for him.

28:39

And you have heard Jason defend his relationship

28:41

with Bo.

28:42

Jason told us that this experience has been

28:45

extremely invalidating.

28:47

Like it erased the entire five year relationship

28:49

that he and Bo shared. Like it didn't

28:51

matter. He was a nobody.

28:53

Despite the fact that Bo had chosen to spend

28:55

those five years with Jason

28:57

and asked Jason to marry him, he feels

28:59

like he is constantly on the defensive having

29:02

to prove that they were together and that yes,

29:04

they really loved one another.

29:07

We quoted the words of Michelle

29:09

Obama a lot because we both loved her. And

29:11

what she said, as you can mention was when they

29:14

go low, we go high. And so

29:17

when people go low because they are hurting

29:20

or because they don't have all of the facts

29:22

or they believe a narrative because they're

29:24

not using all of the facts, they're

29:26

hurting. I would never want to increase

29:29

somebody's hurt or their pain while they're hurting

29:31

because I know what I'm going through. I just wish

29:33

that people would understand that I'm

29:35

also hurting a lot. And it's caused

29:37

a tremendous toll on me. And so

29:40

when I hear these kinds of comments and I

29:42

get asked these kinds of questions while I understand

29:44

why I'm being asked and it's fair because people want to know,

29:46

it's extremely hurtful. And when

29:49

I can provide an abundance of evidence

29:51

that some of these things not only are they not

29:53

true, but it just doesn't make

29:55

any sense,

29:56

it's very, very herming

29:58

to not only my mental health. health, but just

30:01

to have an invalidation of somebody

30:04

who loved me and I loved them so incredibly

30:06

much is extremely hurtful. And

30:09

we'll leave it at that, I guess.

30:10

I don't want to attack the family because even

30:12

though I'm trying to be the better person as far as not

30:15

publicly saying anything,

30:16

my intention, because Beau would never want

30:18

me to do that. Beau would never be okay with me

30:21

talking negatively about his family.

30:23

And so I am going to respect

30:25

that because I won't do that. And if they choose

30:27

to continue to do that about me, they have to do what

30:30

they have to do. But I just don't want

30:32

to go to that level. But I think people can

30:34

figure it out if they just look at the evidence and

30:36

the court documents. I was pushed aside

30:39

to get me out of the way. It's not just

30:41

like losing the person that you love the most

30:43

in the world. I lost everything. And

30:45

I don't have a mom to go talk to anymore. Beau

30:47

was my entire life.

30:49

And so when you lose someone like that,

30:51

and then you look at the plans we had,

30:54

we were supposed to get married in June.

30:56

We were actively buying a place in

30:58

Palm Beach, Florida. We had all

31:00

these plans. And so then he texted me

31:02

the adoption link the entire month of November,

31:04

he was putting pressure on me about kids. And I was so happy

31:06

because I wanted to start a family. And it's

31:09

like, can you imagine my entire world

31:12

overnight, it's gone. And so people

31:14

have to understand that I'm not trying to create a pity

31:16

party, anything like that. But it's everything.

31:18

It's not just losing your best friend. It's losing like

31:21

our plans and our future that we planned out together.

31:23

And we were very intricate about those details.

31:26

After this episode was produced, we

31:28

were finally able to reach Sandy last

31:30

week. So we were able to add in some

31:32

of her perspective about Beau, their

31:35

long friendship and the division that developed

31:37

after Beau ultimately vanished.

31:40

Well, I met Beau God

31:42

when he was about 2021. He

31:45

was living in New York, and

31:47

he had helped

31:50

my son in a very

31:52

loving way. And as a result

31:55

of that, I thought very kindly

31:58

of him, obviously. My son

32:00

had some mental issues,

32:03

so Bo was there for him during

32:05

a difficult time and I really appreciated

32:08

it. And I ended up taking

32:11

Bo under my wing. He

32:13

did think of me as his godmother.

32:16

First he would introduce me as his aunt

32:18

and then he, I became his godmother.

32:21

He would introduce me as his godmother.

32:22

There was much

32:25

more endearing terms for him.

32:28

You often wished I were his mother

32:30

and I guess I played that role to

32:32

a great degree. I can

32:34

understand them feeling jealous

32:37

or threatened by it because

32:40

they want to be the closest ones to Bo.

32:43

But Bo and I had an

32:46

affinity with one another that

32:49

no one else shared. We were very,

32:51

very close. We were very, very

32:53

close.

32:54

I wouldn't want my son

32:56

feeling somebody else with his mother.

32:59

You know, I would be jealous so

33:02

I can understand where that's coming

33:04

from. I see how bright

33:07

he is and energetic and he's a

33:09

workaholic and he's

33:12

holy moly. This guy is

33:15

going to be successful. There's

33:17

like no holding this guy back.

33:20

I mean, you could just, it's written

33:22

all over him.

33:23

So he talks me into,

33:26

he's a good salesman. You can't sell

33:28

me anything. And he

33:30

sold me into investing

33:32

in an art gallery with him that

33:36

he developed and we lost money

33:38

on. He told everybody what

33:40

they wanted to hear and he especially

33:43

told his parents what they wanted to

33:45

hear.

33:46

Because he wanted their approval

33:48

and love and him owning

33:51

an art gallery

33:53

and always very grandiose in

33:55

many ways. You know, he liked to do

33:57

big things.

33:59

with people

34:01

that you could not like him.

34:04

Bo could walk into a room

34:07

and he could

34:09

attract the most successful

34:12

or famous person in the room. It

34:15

was just they would attract to him like

34:17

flies to fly paper. He just

34:19

had that natural ability that

34:21

people were drawn to him and he

34:24

and I would often joke about it. He'd

34:27

go out somewhere and who'd you meet now

34:29

and he'd text me and say,

34:31

oh I'm on a carriage ride with the

34:33

Rockefellers and I thought he was lying

34:36

except then he would send me a video

34:39

of him riding in a carriage

34:41

with the Rockefellers somewhere. Bo's

34:44

thing was selling.

34:45

He could sell you the Brooklyn Bridge

34:48

and he was relentless. He wouldn't let

34:50

go. Like a dog with a bone,

34:53

once he had it in his mind to

34:55

do something or get something done,

34:57

he was relentless. He

34:59

had the ability to find out things

35:02

that nobody else did and also come

35:04

up with these creative ideas

35:06

that nobody else would think

35:08

about. So he comes up with

35:10

the concept of sober grid.

35:13

It's a great concept. I'm

35:15

willing

35:15

to introduce him to

35:17

people who

35:19

would be interested in investing

35:22

and I get him his initial

35:24

seed investors to get it off

35:26

the ground. Sandy

35:28

told us that she objected to David being named

35:31

conservator and the moves that followed,

35:34

including removing her from the board because

35:36

she doesn't feel that he has the experience

35:38

necessary to fill that position. She

35:41

told us that she doesn't think he's a bad person.

35:43

She just didn't feel that it was the right move to further

35:46

Bo's wishes and for the success of Bo's

35:48

company.

35:49

Sandy also mentioned to us what she feels

35:51

made this situation really blow up. She

35:54

said that she suggested that Jason act

35:56

as the interim CEO while Bo

35:58

was missing and

35:59

that was when things really broke down.

36:02

Amy also mentioned this to us.

36:05

Jason wanted to become

36:07

CEO of sober

36:08

group and bold witnessing. And

36:10

from what I understand, although I've

36:12

never seen a thing,

36:14

the people in sober group tell me that

36:16

they have emails between Sandy

36:18

talking about

36:19

this.

36:20

Jason wanted to be put in a CEO

36:23

and David said,

36:24

that's ridiculous. And David said, no,

36:27

because that's not those wishes. While

36:30

speaking with Sandy, she told us that she

36:32

was the one who suggested that Jason would be

36:34

a good fit for the position and why she

36:36

believed that. Bo

36:38

was the genius behind this organization.

36:41

They were all work for bees and

36:44

and they don't know how to come

36:46

up with new concepts on on how

36:48

to make it to happen.

36:50

Bo adored Jason.

36:54

Did they have fights? Yes. Jason

36:57

had an intricate and not

36:59

intricate, but definitely a

37:02

healthy understanding of

37:04

sober grid and outside

37:06

of the box thinker. And

37:09

through conversations with everybody

37:12

I was having and talking

37:14

to Jason, I thought, God, he would

37:16

be a great CEO.

37:18

And that's what blew everything up. Once

37:21

I suggested that Jason become

37:23

the CEO, because I could have

37:26

used Jason to bring to Wall Street

37:28

people to

37:30

make presentations.

37:30

There's no one

37:33

else

37:33

I could have brought at sober grid

37:36

to make financial presentations.

37:38

I was in the international

37:41

oil trading business. I

37:43

have a lot of diversified experience

37:46

in business.

37:47

Very good with money and seeing

37:50

where money has to

37:52

be cut back and spent. And

37:54

I understand the business world. Once

37:57

I suggested Jason.

37:59

as a temporary CEO

38:02

temporarily until Bo

38:04

showed back up, because at this point,

38:07

we're still hopeful that Bo will

38:09

be back.

38:10

Everything, the ship hits the

38:12

fan.

38:13

I was on the board. He

38:15

had put me on the board. I was

38:17

trying to find out the end

38:20

of workings of how Silver

38:22

Grid was planning on making

38:24

money, staying afloat, raising

38:26

money. And like

38:28

I said, as soon as I recommended

38:31

Jason as the temporary CEO,

38:35

everything blew up,

38:36

started creating all kinds

38:38

of problems. And let's

38:41

assume

38:42

Bo and Jason did

38:44

break up.

38:45

Let's assume that the

38:48

mother and the sister story is

38:50

right on this. Wouldn't you

38:53

think that

38:54

after five years

38:56

with somebody, they'd

38:57

still be close to Jason

39:00

to want to be close to Bo? Why

39:02

are they pushing him away?

39:05

Why are they fighting with him? I

39:07

don't get it at all. No

39:10

consideration for Jason at all.

39:12

I spent five years with him.

39:14

Bo adored Jason.

39:17

He just adored them. I don't know why

39:19

the family is so against Jason.

39:21

I really don't know why.

39:24

Jason was the best thing that ever

39:26

happened to Bo in his life, actually.

39:29

He was the most loving person

39:32

that Bo ever had in his life.

39:34

Bo would be, if he's dead, will

39:37

be turning over in his grave

39:39

that this has come down the way

39:41

it has come down. I mean, he would be,

39:43

he would just be outraged.

39:46

Time will sell. I'm not, there's

39:49

no personal vendetta going on

39:51

here. I wish them all luck.

39:54

He

40:00

said that he never asked to be CEO.

40:03

Instead, he said he was asked by the board and

40:05

told them that he would only take the position temporarily

40:08

and for no pay.

40:10

All the accusations were so upsetting to

40:12

Jason that he ultimately decided

40:14

to walk away from objecting to the conservatorship,

40:17

despite feeling that none of this would have been

40:19

what Bo wanted.

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42:02

it.

42:14

We have contemplated this divide over a

42:16

period of months, and we can't say

42:18

that what anyone has said to us or to the courts

42:20

is the complete truth. We weren't there,

42:23

and Beau is not here to tell us his side of

42:25

the story. It's

42:26

entirely possible that Beau was venting

42:28

to friends and family about his relationship

42:30

with Jason and saying something completely

42:33

different in conversations with Jason.

42:35

People vent about their relationships. That's

42:38

normal.

42:39

It just seems irrelevant to figuring out what

42:41

happened to Beau. It has caused so

42:43

many hurt feelings, and now it's difficult

42:45

for everyone to come together to work toward

42:47

the common cause which is finding Beau.

42:50

As previously mentioned, we have seen

42:52

a lot of division in cases that we've covered.

42:55

The division here seems to be more of an extreme

42:57

example. We wanted to speak to an expert

43:00

about this topic in general, since

43:02

we have a lot of families of the missing who listen to the

43:04

show. So we spoke to Dr. Scott

43:06

from the podcast, LA Not So Confidential.

43:10

First, we asked him to tell us a bit about himself

43:12

and the work that he does.

43:14

So my media name is Dr.

43:17

Scott, and I

43:19

am a forensic and clinical psychologist in

43:21

practice in Los Angeles.

43:23

Besides doing a podcast, LA

43:25

Not So Confidential with

43:27

my peer and bestie friend

43:30

who is also a psychologist,

43:32

a law enforcement psychologist, and forensic psychologist,

43:35

Dr. Shiloh, we both

43:37

work in conjunction with

43:40

law enforcement. I'm in a community

43:42

co-responder model,

43:44

and my day job goals are

43:46

assessing risk, managing threat, and linking clients

43:48

to services, as well as mitigating

43:52

potential threats in the community.

43:54

I also advocate for diversion for

43:56

clients when it's appropriate so

43:58

that people can get the treatment that they need

44:01

rather than be caught on this merry-go-round

44:03

of incarceration with no treatment.

44:06

And my specialties in my private practice

44:09

are anxiety disorders, life

44:11

transitions, and male role norms.

44:14

Dr. Scott explained why these types of

44:16

divisions seem to happen in so many missing persons

44:19

cases. That

44:21

is unfortunately more of a common

44:24

experience or phenomenon than

44:27

we would like. That missing persons,

44:30

families, and their support systems

44:33

sometimes don't know what to do with

44:35

their own emotional experience and they

44:37

can

44:38

inadvertently work against each

44:40

other. But first of all, let's just focus on the fact that

44:43

an incidence or an experience of having

44:45

a family member just disappear

44:48

off the face of the earth is an extremely

44:50

traumatic event. At the very core

44:52

foundation of the experience is this lack of answers

44:55

and a lack of information as well as dealing

44:57

with the loss of that loved one. And I'd

44:59

go on to say that even in the

45:01

presence of very complex relationships

45:04

that may not be perceived as super supportive

45:06

or super engaged or warm

45:09

and loving, there's still going to be an extreme

45:11

amount of discomfort dealing with the fact

45:13

that someone in your periphery

45:16

has disappeared.

45:17

So separations and challenges

45:19

and conflicts between family members can emerge out of

45:22

a number of issues.

45:23

One of them can be a radical difference

45:25

in value systems among those individuals,

45:28

perhaps despite coming from the same nuclear

45:30

family unit. Individuals can

45:33

develop an understanding of their own needs

45:35

that are very different from what their

45:38

family adheres to or what

45:40

their family expects of them.

45:42

And then traumatic events can also change

45:44

things, can radically upset the

45:47

balance of family and the family is always going to strive

45:50

towards what we call homeostasis or

45:52

coming back to a sense of balance. And that can

45:54

be a problem. Families are really

45:56

complex machines with each

45:58

individual playing a role.

45:59

role that meets the need of the family and the individual.

46:02

That doesn't mean it meets it in a healthy way, but

46:04

it means that it meets its needs. So if

46:07

you think of each individual as a gear

46:09

or a cog in the machine, they function

46:11

in relationship to the other. So when

46:14

people are forced into particular roles,

46:16

we see things like happen where, where people

46:18

become

46:19

seen as one thing in their family, like they're

46:21

the scapegoat.

46:23

That's the person that everyone else points to

46:25

and they say, they're

46:26

the problem, there's the black sheep.

46:28

If they would just get their shit together, everything

46:30

would be fine.

46:31

But that's a fallacy and that's a faulty understanding

46:34

of family dynamics. And it's also externalizing

46:37

all this blame, usually onto

46:40

one person. There are so many factors that

46:42

can affect this and particularly where

46:44

a family comes from with financial means or no

46:46

financial means, or depending on what

46:48

money means to a particular family system,

46:51

financial windfalls, financial stressors,

46:53

they can all cause a lot of conflict.

46:55

People can really

46:57

get emotional and emotionally mixed

46:59

up about what that money or the lack

47:02

of money means. And if you're not processing

47:04

your emotions appropriately or successfully,

47:06

it gets very blurry among family

47:08

members. And they may be thinking that they're

47:11

being put upon or that something's being taken

47:13

away from them and it

47:14

just gets very complicated

47:16

very quickly. And also, I mean,

47:19

what, what we do is then we have a bunch of unmanaged

47:21

emotions.

47:22

And when people have unmanaged emotions,

47:25

most of the time it comes out as anger and then

47:27

anger cause divisions.

47:29

People go to their corners of the boxing

47:31

ring and they dig their heels in and they're all

47:34

stomping for a fight. Where

47:36

each family member is a cog in a machine

47:38

and then suddenly one of those cogs is missing.

47:41

So everybody else is going, well, who's

47:43

going to fulfill this role? Who is

47:45

going to be the thing

47:47

that fills that empty void for us? And

47:50

so emotionally, everybody's scrambling

47:52

to make sense of it.

47:54

And that scrambling doesn't always

47:56

work out well for everybody.

47:58

One reason that we wanted to. you this aspect

48:01

of Beau's story was to explain this

48:03

elephant in the room. Many of our listeners

48:05

take an interest in the cases we cover beyond

48:08

just listening to our episodes, and

48:10

they join the social media groups and pages that

48:12

the families and friends have created in

48:14

order to advocate for their missing loved one.

48:17

Our listeners can see this division on social

48:19

media. They can hear the tension in the voices

48:21

of Beau's loved ones. We couldn't ignore

48:24

this and needed to address it, but

48:26

what we wanted to do here was to get some advice

48:28

on how to overcome this divide and move forward

48:30

together in the search for Beau.

48:33

When people are missing, there should

48:35

be this unified front to find

48:37

that individual,

48:39

but then we witness these divides

48:41

in the support system and how it just really

48:43

muddies the water with multiple police

48:46

reports being filed, multiple reports

48:48

coming in from different people, different perspectives,

48:51

and certainly in a case like this, the

48:54

explosion of stuff that is posted on social

48:56

media. And that absolutely

48:58

can be detrimental to finding a missing person.

49:01

I think that if there's a way to

49:03

deliver a message to all the interested

49:05

parties is

49:07

what do you want out of this? What

49:10

is your desired outcome?

49:12

And how does it fall into one

49:14

of three areas? And I think what

49:17

I try and do is I just try and get people to think of

49:19

things differently when I'm doing conflict

49:21

resolution. And

49:22

so I go, well, what do you want out of this?

49:24

Do you want resolve? Do you

49:26

want a resolution? Do

49:28

you want to grieve

49:29

or do you want clarity? And

49:32

that usually, those are usually areas

49:34

that they haven't really thought of because they've been

49:37

so

49:38

focused on finding

49:40

their loved one, finding their loved one, and then all the

49:42

conflicts that have come up that they have really

49:45

gotten away from what was initially

49:47

motivating them.

49:48

And many times clients are stuck. Like I'll have to

49:50

intervene with, do you want to be right or do you

49:52

want to be happy? And

49:54

I don't use it in those particular words,

49:56

but

49:57

I'll illustrate it like, okay, well, you

49:59

and person B and person

50:01

C and person D all have

50:03

lost someone that you love.

50:06

And it seems like that the goal

50:09

would be towards resolving

50:12

that issue. Let's see if we can

50:14

find out what happened to our loved one. And

50:17

then you work backwards from that. But

50:19

that takes a lot of cooperation, right?

50:22

That takes also somebody getting in the room,

50:24

like physically or virtually in the room

50:26

with all these parties and detangling

50:29

or dismantling all the resentment that

50:31

currently exists. And look, if your

50:34

first

50:35

and foremost ideals, needs, drives

50:37

are not

50:39

a unified front and finding your loved one,

50:41

then there, I

50:42

really would challenge people to engage in

50:44

a higher level of self-examination. Because like

50:46

I said before, if everybody is squared off in their corners,

50:49

then there's always going to be a fight. So

50:52

define the goal and consider

50:54

getting a mediator. And there are so many different

50:56

types of mediators out there

50:58

that do this kind of work.

51:00

But I would just hate to see situations

51:03

like this,

51:04

where there's a common vested

51:07

interest, but everybody is squabbling

51:10

so much that they can't get on track

51:12

with a shared vision at

51:14

the risk of throwing gasoline on

51:16

the fire. I do want to say, I want

51:18

to acknowledge that sometimes people are

51:20

in the position where they really

51:22

are willing to do that, but

51:25

the other members of the team are

51:27

not so unified. So there are

51:29

challenges. It's not easy. It's not

51:31

easy to make that happen.

51:33

But ultimately, if that is your goal to be

51:35

a unified front and to find your loved one or to

51:37

get resolution, find answers,

51:39

then

51:39

you have to find some commonality.

51:41

The goal is bringing home this,

51:44

this loved one that's missing. You know, we

51:46

just have to all be on the same page. And

51:49

I think really, it

51:51

only takes a couple of steps.

51:53

It only takes a couple of emotional steps

51:55

for people to get back to

51:57

that place. And that's what I'm hoping

51:59

for.

51:59

out of all this. I really

52:02

hope that

52:03

everybody who loves Beau, and clearly

52:05

there were a lot of people that really love him, that

52:08

they're able to get some answers and find some resolution

52:10

and comfort in each other for

52:12

their shared love of

52:15

this wonderful guy.

52:17

We hope that Dr. Scott's words can ease

52:19

some of the tension here.

52:21

We understand that everyone is hurting and

52:23

sometimes that causes people to lash out

52:25

and feelings to be hurt,

52:27

but now we want to move away from this aspect

52:29

of the case and bring the focus back to

52:31

finding Beau. In our fourth and

52:33

final installment in our series about

52:35

Beau Mann, the focus, we're

52:38

going to really take a look at the things like the stressors

52:40

in Beau's life and the people who he had been spending

52:42

time with. Many people told us

52:45

that Beau was too trusting. He tried

52:47

to help people when they were down. He gave them chances,

52:50

sometimes too many.

52:51

Sometimes people took advantage of Beau.

52:53

Could that be something that led to his disappearance?

52:56

Beau's personal assistant, Diana, had

52:58

witnessed this herself when Beau tried

53:01

to help two people who ended up stealing from

53:03

him.

53:04

Beau was very, very generous

53:06

and he hired these two

53:08

kids. They were probably in their early 20s, maybe

53:11

mid 20s. I think he was trying

53:13

to help them out. You know, he was trying to keep

53:15

things sober. He

53:17

was trying to help them out. So he was giving them work

53:19

to do. And

53:21

the girl, he had worked with me

53:23

and

53:23

he tried to get her to help

53:26

me with, like I told you, I was doing the contact

53:28

list of angel investors.

53:31

Well, he gave them his

53:33

credit card to go pick

53:36

something up for him. His dry

53:37

cleaning, or I don't know what it was.

53:40

And they went on a spree. They

53:43

bought gift cards. She tried

53:45

to sell me a gift card. I mean,

53:47

yeah, they took money out of his account, but

53:50

Beau had given them his card. And

53:53

then we heard from Beau's friend, Anne, who

53:55

told us about another person that Beau had helped in

53:57

the months before he vanished and things

53:59

did not turn out the way that Beau had planned.

54:02

And this situation sounded even more serious.

54:06

One thing that really bothers me about

54:08

the situation is the fact that

54:11

facts have been reported incorrectly

54:14

about a certain individual. I believe his

54:16

name is Blake.

54:17

He was a, is, I mean, I

54:21

don't know anything about his whereabouts, is

54:23

a younger gay man

54:26

who

54:26

Beau, because Beau was very, very

54:29

kind and would help anyone in need,

54:31

man, woman, child.

54:34

He was just a very compassionate, kind

54:36

person. He would never let somebody

54:39

be in a bad situation if there was something

54:41

he could do to help.

54:42

And that was a great thing about

54:44

Beau, is a great thing about Beau, but it's also,

54:47

he can get himself into trouble

54:49

because he has repeatedly

54:51

trusted people that have turned out to

54:54

be not good people. And that

54:56

was the case in this situation with this. He

54:59

was, sort of had found himself

55:01

on hard times. I think he had some kind of

55:04

skills with something that could

55:06

help Sobergrid. So Beau,

55:08

being Beau, because he's beautiful

55:10

and kind and generous, said,

55:12

well, I'm going to be gone. You can stay in my

55:14

apartment in LA so that you can be

55:16

okay. Apparently he didn't have a place to live.

55:19

And then maybe I could help you to get a job

55:21

at Sobergrid.

55:22

That was just Beau. But unfortunately,

55:25

this didn't turn out very well because

55:27

it's been reported,

55:28

this really is shocking to me, that

55:31

he had a quote unquote friends with benefits

55:33

situation going on.

55:36

And that's not the case.

55:38

He was very much in love with Jason.

55:40

He would never cheat on Jason, who

55:42

was planning on marrying him and adopting

55:45

children with him. I think what

55:47

happened, knowing Beau and knowing

55:49

the situation is that he allowed him

55:51

to stay in his apartment.

55:53

And then it turns out apparently that the kid

55:55

wouldn't leave after a certain amount of

55:57

time and had to be removed. by

56:00

a third person because he just

56:02

sort of glommed on. One of Beau's

56:05

friends had to basically

56:07

come in and just say, you have to leave

56:09

because he was mistreating Beau.

56:12

This quote about friends with benefits comes

56:15

from a January 5, 2022 article

56:17

that was published in The Telegram and Gazette.

56:20

The reporter had spoken to Blake via phone

56:22

and he said that he worked for Beau. They weren't

56:25

dating, but were friends with benefits,

56:27

which he described as Beau allowing him to stay

56:29

at his apartment for a period of time.

56:32

Blake said that Beau had texted him around Thanksgiving,

56:35

seeing if Blake wanted to hang out, but

56:37

Blake claimed that he was in Las Vegas at that

56:39

time.

56:40

Jason told us more about what he knows about

56:43

this. When Blake Brown

56:45

said in that article and he was quoted saying we

56:47

were friends with benefits, most people would

56:49

assume that means sex. I'm not so sure about

56:51

that. I don't think Beau would do that to me. I really don't

56:54

because Beau and I had an open enough dialogue and

56:56

an open relationship. I

56:58

don't mean open sexually. I mean open like we would tell

57:00

each other everything, even things that were very unflattering

57:02

or things that could potentially bother us. He

57:05

never shared that with me. Unfortunately, there's

57:07

been so many people that have surfaced since Beau's

57:09

disappeared that I had no knowledge

57:11

of whatsoever. I don't

57:13

believe that Beau was cheating on me. I don't

57:16

believe that. Maybe people will call me ignorant

57:19

or naive. I don't believe he was. I believe

57:21

that Beau would have helped anybody and he

57:23

often helped people that were very troubled. He

57:26

didn't care if they had records or not because Beau was always

57:28

looking to help people and people were always taking

57:30

advantage of Beau.

57:32

You learned in part two last day

57:34

that on the day that Beau disappeared

57:36

around the same time that he was last seen,

57:39

he received an email about his bank account

57:41

being suspended due to failed login

57:43

attempts. It made us wonder who could have

57:45

been trying to access Beau's account. It

57:48

could have been Beau, but what if it wasn't?

57:50

Jason told us more about the people Beau had

57:52

trusted who later ended up ripping him

57:55

off and how they may have had access

57:57

to Beau's banking information.

58:00

Starting in June,

58:02

I was with him and his car,

58:04

and we were at a Starbucks, and he said, oh

58:06

my God, somebody is trying to use my account.

58:09

And so obviously it wasn't me or anybody because I

58:11

was sitting right next to him, and I'm like, oh my gosh. And so we

58:13

pulled over at the Starbucks, and he had me go

58:15

in and get some Starbucks, and he called this one

58:17

of those identities, that thing, and he

58:20

put me, and I'm still on it to this day, he put he and I

58:22

on it, and I didn't hear too much more

58:24

about it after that, and I'm like, I'm sure you'll be okay. And

58:26

then when he came to Michigan,

58:29

I forgot if we were in Aruba, or if it was after Aruba

58:32

or both,

58:32

but I remember that we were together, and

58:34

there was someone actively trying to buy a car at

58:37

Carvana,

58:38

and I remember there was somebody, it was at a jewelry store

58:41

in Los Angeles trying to buy jewelry,

58:43

and there was people buying gift cards. There

58:45

was also money that

58:47

was stolen from him. I had learned,

58:49

and again, this is all hearsay, but I had learned

58:51

that Blake had been staying with Beau for almost a month,

58:54

and that Beau had to have him physically removed because he wouldn't

58:56

leave, and that would have

58:58

given somebody access to all of Beau's financials,

59:01

all of them, because Beau had a small place that

59:03

he used as an office and as an apartment. It's

59:06

a very small place, and he would have had access to every

59:08

record of Beau's, and so

59:10

I didn't know that when all this was going on.

59:13

So this is where we're going to pick up next week.

59:16

We'll be discussing this situation as well as others

59:18

that could possibly be relevant, and may

59:20

shed light on what happened to Beau.

59:22

We will also be taking a look at Beau's phone

59:25

records, where we noticed something strange,

59:27

and really take a closer look at what Beau was juggling

59:29

with at the time,

59:31

now that we have cleared some of the distraction out

59:33

of the way. If you have any information

59:35

regarding the disappearance of Beau Mann, please

59:38

contact the LAPD Missing Persons Unit

59:40

at 213-486-0260.

59:45

If you would like to remain anonymous, you can

59:47

call LA Regional Crime Stoppers at 1-800-222-TIPS.

59:53

It's difficult to position, to be in,

59:55

to be a friend, and

59:58

have somebody who don't. definitively

1:00:00

know what happened to them and

1:00:03

to share things that they may not

1:00:05

have ever shared with anybody else. And

1:00:07

so it's difficult to position to be in,

1:00:10

to tell the story, but at

1:00:12

the same time you want as much information

1:00:15

out there so that we can find

1:00:17

him or I would know what happened to

1:00:19

us, no matter

1:00:20

what it is. So

1:00:22

I always, always wanted to fit

1:00:25

in like most of us do.

1:00:27

And I think that I

1:00:29

think he was very lucky and because

1:00:32

of his talents to create

1:00:34

Sober Grid. But I also

1:00:36

think that he had

1:00:38

another part of his life, which

1:00:40

he also equally enjoyed.

1:00:44

And for a lot of people,

1:00:46

it's like you have to make the decision, do I

1:00:48

want to live a double life? Or

1:00:51

can I surrender fully to this person

1:00:54

that I want to be? And, you

1:00:56

know, and I think it's hard for a lot of people,

1:00:58

just like when you hear politicians

1:01:00

or even ministers or

1:01:03

people of the cloth and get into trouble

1:01:05

because at the end of the day, we're

1:01:08

all human. And we're not this

1:01:10

image, which a lot of people think we

1:01:12

are or they don't know what's behind the

1:01:15

curtain. It was hard for Bo

1:01:17

to reach out for help because

1:01:19

he was the CEO of Sober Grid.

1:01:22

How could the CEO

1:01:24

of Sober Grid

1:01:26

be in such a dark place? And

1:01:29

even though Bo would

1:01:31

say things like, Oh,

1:01:34

but it makes me understand more

1:01:36

the disease, the truth of the matter is,

1:01:39

if you want to be honest, it separated

1:01:41

him more from addicts

1:01:44

because he lost himself.

1:02:03

That brings us to the end of episode 392. I'd like

1:02:05

to thank everyone who spoke with us for this

1:02:08

series. And special thanks to

1:02:10

Dr. Scott from LA Not So Confidential

1:02:13

podcast. You can find LA

1:02:15

Not So Confidential wherever you listen to

1:02:17

podcasts. If you have a missing

1:02:19

loved one that you'd like to have featured on the show, there's

1:02:21

a case submission form at the vanished podcast.com.

1:02:25

If you'd like to join in on the discussion, there's a page

1:02:27

and discussion group on Facebook. You can

1:02:29

find us on Twitter at the vanished pod and

1:02:31

also on Instagram. If

1:02:33

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