0:02

This is Tim Staton with Tim stating the obvious. What is this podcast about? It's simple. You

0:08

are entitled to great leadership everywhere you go, whether it's a church, whether it's to work,

0:14

whether it's at your house. You are entitled to great leadership. And so in this podcast. We

0:19

take leadership principles and theories and turn them into everyday relatable and usable advice. And a

0:25

quick disclaimer. The show process or service by trademark trademark manufacturer, otherwise,

0:28

does not necessarily constitute and reply and endorse of anyone that I employed by or favors

0:31

in the representation. The views expressed here in my show are my own express and do not necessarily

0:34

say or affect those of any Hey, Russell. Welcome back to the show.

0:37

Hey, thanks. I'm glad to be back. Glad to have you here. Hey, leaders. So I just wanna do a quick recap, because we've done several

0:44

of the series now. And so we started the series off with the idea that there is a difference

0:49

between management and leadership. And In leaders, we have to have the ability to have a vision

0:54

and to be able to take risk. And those risks come with some unwanted consequences or side effects,

0:59

And that is uncomfortable feelings and fear. And then we talked about how we have to overcome

1:04

fear by developing courage, and then deal with our with those unwanted consequences and side

1:09

effects, which is our feelings. And that's what we talked about in our last episode, is how

1:12

important it is to be able to deal with our feelings and our emotions. And you provide a really

1:17

great model on how to understand that and sift through ourselves and, to work through it and

1:22

becoming on masters of our own emotions and of others. So in this episode, what are we gonna

1:28

be talking about? Right. So what we're gonna talk about is generating power. So the essence of of leadership,

1:36

of course, is, you know, you have a vision, you need to go towards it. And the way to get there,

1:42

one of the things that you need to be able to do is to be powerful. To be and by power and I'm

1:46

gonna talk a little bit more about what power is or have a good definition of it. But, essentially,

1:51

your power is the ability to create the results that you want. Right? If you don't have that

1:56

power, lead. You're not gonna succeed as a leader.

1:59

Yeah. And and so when when you talk about generating power, you're talking about generating

2:04

the results that you want. Can you kinda go a little bit more into that on what you mean by that?

2:09

Yeah. Thanks. So power is a word that is used a little bit Sloppily, if you would. And what

2:17

I'd like to do is provide a little bit more nuance to it so we really know what we're talking

2:21

about. So what I'd like to do is distinguish power from force and from authority. Okay? So force

2:28

is when somebody Somebody is is, in a situation to force you to do something. The obvious thing

2:38

is somebody pulls a gun on you and says, You know, your money or your life. You're gonna turn

2:42

turn over your money. That person is deploying force. Of course, there are other ways than guns

2:46

that force can be you know, they they certainly be economic force, cultural force, and and and

2:52

whatnot. But I don't wanna call that power Because the more nuance that we can bring here, the

3:00

more effectively we can use these words and understand them. So that's force. Authority is is,

3:07

a position. So if you're elected chair of the board of an organization, all of a sudden, you've

3:13

been given authority. If you're a boss, you have the authority to determine what tasks get done

3:18

and does get done, who who stays, who's fired, or whatever. That is authority. Right. It comes

3:24

with an office. Power, what I'm how I'm defining it now, power is your capability to produce

3:31

the results you want. Okay. No one can give you power and no one can take power away from you.

3:38

Power is self generated or it's given up. We very frequently disempower ourselves. Right? So

3:47

there are many people in positions of authority who are not powerful. You know, we call them

3:52

weak leaders or weak bosses. So you can have authority, but you don't necessarily have power.

3:57

On the reverse is you can be powerful. You can make things happen. Alright. And not be in a

4:03

position of authority. And key to or you can also be a very weak person with a gun, so you you

4:09

could You can deploy force and not be a powerful person. Right? You don't your your life may

4:14

be a mass, in which case it's a good indication you don't have personal power there. Right.

4:19

So making those distinctions and then giving the definition of power is something that you generate

4:27

or that you fail to generate. The focus on our session here today is how do you generate power?

4:34

Right? How do you generate the capacity To produce the results that you want in your life without

4:41

pulling guns or without, you know, having a position of authority. Does that make sense? What

4:48

are your thoughts there, Timothy? No. It makes it makes really good sense actually on on how you laid it out there. And so the

4:55

this really kind of provoked a thought that I had about how you have those who are not in positions

5:01

of authority that seemingly still have that leadership quality about them because they can influence

5:07

other people to make things happen. And if and if we're equating power to the ability to make

5:13

things happen. You know, and it's something that we generate. I never honestly looked at it

5:17

that way, and I think that's a great way to look at it. Because If we're generating our own

5:21

power, you know, my my question is is, you know, how how do we start in generating our own power?

5:27

If we don't know where to start, Where do we start with generating our own power?

5:31

Perfect question. Perfect question. So the first step in generating power is to take responsibility.

5:37

To say, alright. I'm responsible for the results I pull I create in my life. Our tendency this

5:44

is standard human tendency is that when we're not getting the results we want. We blame something

5:49

outside of ourselves. We could be blaming the weather. We can be blaming our boss. We can be

5:54

blaming our spouse. She made me angry. Right. That's giving away your power over your feelings.

6:01

She made me angry. Right? So as soon as you put it over onto her, There's nothing you can do

6:07

except yell at her. Right? So you're the the the technical term is you're giving, You're putting

6:15

the locus of power outside of yourself as opposed to putting the locus of power inside of yourself.

6:22

In a coaching, the distinction here, this is a key distinction is either you're at effect. So

6:29

you're at effect of something outside of yourself. I'm out of effect of my wife or I'm out of

6:34

effect of my boss or I'm out of effect of the of the weather or I'm at cause. So I'm gonna cause

6:42

the the results I want in my life. Okay. So this is A lens to look through. It's not the truth.

6:50

It's not how the world really works. It's just a way of looking at the world That starts you

6:56

generating your own power. So I'm I'm reminded of the words have meaning. And I and I don't know if you've heard, that

7:05

that saying often. I know I have in my career. When either we write things or we say things

7:10

and People are like, hey, you know what? Words have meaning. That's not the right word that

7:14

we wanna use there. And then, that also reminds me of, you know, how we address things and the

7:19

way we say them could also relate to how we give away power, versus, like, you know, what you

7:25

said that, oh, you know, my wife made me mad or my coworker made me mad. So what would be a

7:31

better way of framing that to help us shift our mindset from retaining power but still assigning

7:39

the right cause and effect relationship to something.

7:43

Well, yeah. I'm not quite sure what you mean by the cause and effect relationship, but if we

7:47

just take that one example of somebody else Made me mad. Right? So you're being at effect to

7:53

someone else. You're giving away power. You're giving away the power of to somebody else to

8:00

control your feelings, to determine who what your feelings are. It's a total disempowerment.

8:07

What's really happening in that situation is somebody, let's just call him Joe, Joe did something

8:14

That you assessed as as, wrong. You made an assessment. You made a judgment that what Joe did

8:23

or said was wrong or disrespectful to you. Right? And from that assessment or that interpretation

8:30

of what Joe said, You generated the feeling of anger. You generated the feeling of anger. So

8:39

if you remember from episode 3 when we were talking about feelings, that our feelings come from

8:43

our interpretation of an event. So Joe did something, We interpret that event as bad or or or

8:50

disrespectful or wrong. Right? And then we generated our anger From that assessment that we

8:56

made of what Joe did. Right? So it's a little complex, but we're responsible for our feelings

9:02

because we're responsible for interpretations. And in any respect, whatever our interpretation

9:08

is, we're still responsible for our feelings. We created our own feeling there. Joe did not.

9:14

And the the point though the point is is not so much whether the cause effect, whether it's

9:20

true, whether, you know, we're we're we're we're We're, you know, it's we're following some

9:24

law of the universe. The effect is is that if we assign Joe, the responsibility over our feelings,

9:32

we're giving away power. And that's what we don't wanna do. We wanna say, okay. I'm angry now

9:38

at what Joe did. I've created my own anger here. What am I going to do with it? What are the

9:44

results I want from this situation? That's generating power.

9:48

Right. So so when we generate the power and we we understand that, what is the next step into

9:58

under after we take responsibility for our own our own perspective. What is the next step?

10:06

Yeah. So the next step is to ask, sorry, what are the results that we want in this situation?

10:12

Right. If Joe's a good friend, you know, maybe the results are is we just wanna communicate

10:17

to him that what he said didn't work for you And wondering whether there's a request in there,

10:22

for example. Hey, Joe. I prefer that you not speak about my wife that way. You know, I'm just

10:27

making this up. And Joe says, Joe will say what Joe says, but if our goal here is to communicate

10:37

to To Joe, how how you reacted to what he said and to keep the relationship or to even deepen

10:45

the relationship. You know, you communicate in a certain way. Right? What you said didn't work

10:51

for me. I found it upsetting. My request is that you don't talk that way in the future, and

10:58

Joe can say yes or no. And if he says no, I'm gonna continue talking that way in the future,

11:02

then You have a decision to make. Is that a friend friend you wanna keep or not? But you wanna

11:08

always act coming back to your question, you always wanna act from What are the results that

11:12

I want and what are the actions that I can take to produce those results? The old way, If Joe

11:19

makes me mad, right, then the only way you have to get the results you want is to yell at Joe,

11:36

And then the results you're gonna get are probably a decayed relationship.

11:39

That that's very interesting on on, you know, how how we come about that because, you know,

11:44

you talk about I'm I'm also thinking about our last episode where we talked about emotions and

11:48

that that, same framework is, you know, we gotta take responsibility, and then we gotta look

11:53

at the results that we want and take action on those results. So how often then, I guess, do

11:59

you find I know the answer is probably gonna be every day because you you talk to people every

12:03

day. But how do we keep how do we keep ourselves out of a victim mentality and keep us into

12:10

the retaining power mentality when it comes to interaction.

12:15

Yeah. So it's it's difficult and the answer is practice. Right. 1, you need to accept responsibilities

12:22

there. I'm gonna be responsible for a 100% of the results I get in life. Right. Now clearly

12:27

circumstances are going to happen. You know, it's gonna rain on your picnic or or a meteor is

12:32

gonna hit your house or whatever that you don't have, quote, unquote control over, but you have

12:37

control over how you respond to those situations. Right? You have, and it's that that you wanna

12:46

take on. What do I need to do Coming back, what do I need to do to get the results I want? If

12:52

we're blaming our boss or, you know, a classic example I get is my boss It's over controlling

13:00

or my boss micromanages me or my boss is dominating me. Right? You know, to be quite frank,

13:07

your boss can only dominate you if you're dominatable. Right? So what do you need to do To start

13:16

generating the power, to assert boundaries, to stand up for yourself, to advocate for yourself,

13:21

and tell your boss that, hey. This doesn't work. Let's see if we can find something else that

13:25

that works so that you and I have a good working relationship. But as long as we're blaming

13:31

somebody else, we almost we we, By definition, put ourselves into victim mode. I'm a victim

13:37

of that person. We like this is really key here about generating power is that we like being

13:45

victims. We like being victims because we get to be righteous It's about the harm that's being

13:51

done to us. Let me say that again. We get to be righteous. We get to feel this charge of righteousness

13:58

in us When when somebody else we perceive somebody else, injuring us in some way. So we get

14:08

that charge of of righteousness, which we really feast on, we really love, but we also get to

14:14

not take responsibility. We don't have do anything if we're the victim. So that's what victimhood

14:20

buys us. We get that that good charge of of righteousness. We get to talk to all of our friends

14:25

about how we've been victimized by this person or that person or this social structure or that

14:29

social structure, and we don't have to take responsibility. And what we get by not taking responsibility,

14:35

of course, is we don't have to be exposed. We don't have to, going back to episode 2, we don't

14:41

have to generate courage because it's scary to take responsibility. We have to go out there

14:47

and we have to expose ourselves. We have to expose ourselves to, you You know, maybe physical

14:52

threats to financial threats or most frequently in this world, in our world today is we have

14:58

to expose ourselves to emotional threats. Somebody may say no. Somebody may say you're a fool.

15:03

Somebody may argue and fight with you. Right? That's the exposure that we get to avoid By being

15:10

a victim. Victimhood by definition is a person who's given up power. I'm giving my power away

15:20

to somebody else. So is this something that you have found to be recent, or is this a common theme that has been

15:28

going on for years. Yeah. That's a good good point. So I can't answer with any degree of authority, you know, Historical

15:37

authority. But my guess is that we have always gone into victimhood. Because if you look at

15:43

fights, You know, arguments that people have had, you know, 2000 years ago. There's always the

15:51

sense of you did something bad to me. Right. But you're right. There's now it's part of the

15:58

zeitgeist here in the United States. This this Culture of victimhood where the degree to which

16:04

you are a victim raises your status. So, apparently and and I have not seen this, Personally,

16:12

but apparently on, say, TikTok or other social media, there is a, There's an attempt to outvictim

16:22

your buddies. I'm a victim of this. I'm a victim of that. You know, That may or may not be true.

16:28

I'm just not aware of it. But the the larger point is that those people, by by seeing themselves

16:34

as victims, are diminishing The richness of their lives or the capability of living a really good life.

16:39

No. That that's a that's a great point. And, I mean, I'm on social media quite a lot, by nature

16:46

of of posting and and and the show and research and everything else that I do, you know, for

16:51

topics. So there is a degree of of victimization, and then there also is a degree of, you know,

16:58

kinda like tabloid ness to that. You know, you're standing at the grocery line and you see the

17:03

tabloids and you say, you know, kid born with bat wings and, you know, oh my goodness. You need

17:07

to look at it. So So there is so there is, like, that, you know, type of mentality to it. But

17:14

I also agree with you that there is a increase within victimhood. And I'm wondering if that's

17:20

because, like you said, you know, we get some righteousness out of of being able to say, hey,

17:26

somebody did me harm and and I am correct. And then you you also bring up that you don't also

17:31

take responsibility and it either because somebody else did something to you that's beyond your

17:35

control. And as we stay on this topic of maintaining our power, and also coming from a place

17:43

of power to get things done. You know, you talked about taking responsibility. So In situations

17:49

like that, and we take responsibility, and we look at the end results that we want. And you

17:54

gave a great example of the boss, you know, being over dominating to you. What is another common

18:01

example, that you can provide that might resonate with somebody of, you know what? I do that,

18:06

and I don't realize I do that.

18:08

Well, A good a good example and maybe some of the listeners are are starting to yell at the

18:13

at the at their, I don't use radios anymore. Whatever they're streaming at their speakers here

18:20

is there are circumstances that happen over which you have no control. I said, you know, the

18:26

meteor in your house or or raining on your picnic. Right? And the question becomes of, well,

18:31

I am a victim. So you're walking down the street and somebody mugs you, you know, pulls a gun

18:35

and takes your money. I'm a victim. How do I generate power in that situation? Like, how do

18:41

I generate power in a situation where the circumstances totally out of my control in some way

18:47

injured me. Why aren't I a victim there? And I would say this, yes, you're a victim there, What

18:54

we don't wanna do is then stay in our victimhood. The question is, We were mugged. How do we

19:04

respond in a way that generates power as opposed to gives up gives away power? Giving away power

19:10

might be, hey. I'm never walking in the city again. Right? Or I don't trust men. Say it's a

19:16

man that loved you. I'm not gonna trust men or I'm gonna stay home or, you know, the the victimhood

19:24

might be that that they're whining and complaining to their friends for the next with 5 years

19:31

about being mugged and losing $40. If you come from a point of view or from the lens of being

19:36

a cause, The question then becomes is what are the results I want? I've just been mugged. It

19:42

was really terrifying. It was really scary. What do I need to do? Right? What kind of life do

19:48

I wanna lead as a result of that? Right? And what are the actions I needed to take to get there?

19:53

So it may well be Right. They said they asked, what did I do and what way am I responsible for

19:59

being bugged? Was I walking down a dark street, You know, in the dead of night, in a place that

20:05

I knew to be dangerous? Okay. What do I need to change my how do I think to change my behavior

20:10

so that I don't become a target of a mugging. Right? There's been evidence shown that people

20:15

that that are walked with great intention down the street staring ahead are less likely to mug

20:22

than people kinda wander down the street looking at all the sites. Right? Maybe I need to walk

20:27

down the street with more attention. Right? So you can sit and say, What do I need to do in

20:31

the future not to be mugged? And and there's some people say, well, I'm gonna I'm gonna get

20:36

a pistol and and and, you know, I've concealed carry. Somebody pulls a gun on me, I pull a gun

20:40

on them. So that might right. Those might be those might be ways those are those are ways of

20:47

being a cause. What do I need to do differently so it doesn't happen again? So that's pre. And

20:52

then the post is how do I how do I heal from this traumatic experience. How do I recover from

20:57

this traumatic experience so it does not impact me? It does not lessen my enjoyment of life.

21:03

So again, you know, in answer to your question, a real common way we become victims is when

21:09

circumstances out of our control impact our life. Our power comes in responding in such a way

21:17

to those circumstances that enhances our life as opposed to diminishes Does that make sense?

21:24

No. It makes this makes really good sense on being able to recognize the difference. And you

21:29

bring up a a very difficult, thing that you mentioned that people need to do, and that is, you

21:36

know, what portion of responsibility do I need to take? Oftentimes, I hear, well, you can't

21:42

revictimize the victim. That's that's not okay to do. But sometimes, maybe, we do need to take

21:48

an honest look of what happened, look at the facts, and then take responsibility for what needs

21:54

to be responsible for. Right? So, yeah, you're you're you you put your finger on a really, really good issue. And I wanna

22:03

make a distinction between blaming and taking responsibility. And often people conflate or,

22:09

you know, put the 2 together that to take responsibility is to blame somebody. Blaming is not

22:16

a a way of generating power. Blaming when we blame somebody else, what we do is we generate

22:20

righteousness again. I'm right. You're wrong. Right? That kind of way of dealing with people,

22:28

I'm right, you're wrong, doesn't work. It's another kind of, Yeah. It just doesn't work. You

22:33

don't you're not producing results unless what you wanna do is feel, hey. I'm better than you.

22:38

If those are the results you want in your life, great. You're doing exactly the right thing.

22:41

But that doesn't strengthen a relationship and it doesn't help somebody else generate their

22:46

power. You're not making a contribution to that person. So so that's the one thing. The other

22:53

thing is that there are a lot of people who think I wanna do what I wanna do regardless Of the,

23:02

because I think the world should work this way. I think I should be able to drive my, you know,

23:06

fancy BMW into a dangerous neighborhood and leave the keys in the ignition and then come back

23:12

a day later and find the the car still there with the key still in the ignition. Right? Not

23:18

likely to happen. That's not the way the world works. That may be the way we want the world

23:22

to work, but that's not the way the world works. So a more powerful Way of being there is to

23:28

say, alright. I'm gonna take precautions not to have my car stolen by not parking in that neighborhood

23:34

and taking the keys with me. Right. So it frequently shows up between male and female relationships.

23:41

Some young woman goes to a fat party, gets drunk, and gets raped. Alright. That's a crime. There's

23:46

no way of justifying that crime. The question I'd ask is if that woman wanted to be at cause

23:52

for her life and she did not And the results you wanted was not to be raped. What kind of ways

23:58

could she manage herself such To diminish that. Right? Wear certain kinds of clothes. Go with

24:06

a buddy. Don't drink so much. Don't go to frat parties or whatever. We would all like to live

24:13

in a world where people didn't get raped, but that's not the way the world works. Right? So

24:19

The question I had asked the question that I'd asked the young woman is what are the results

24:23

you want, and what actions do you need to take To get those results. No blame. Just power and responsibility.

24:32

Yeah. And I I think that's a really hard distinction. May maybe more in this day and age, but

24:38

I would think that's a really hard distinction that we need to make between giving blame and

24:43

assuming ability for the things that we need to take responsibility for. So another question

24:49

I have then is, how often do you experience rationalizing away, not taking responsibility.

24:56

Like, daily. I mean, my whole business is pretty my whole coaching business is predicated on

25:01

that that people People don't wanna take responsibility or they rationalize it away. I'm, I'm

25:08

working with a No. No. Well, so a real common And this comes back to, again, episodes 23 a lot.

25:23

If somebody We'll see something that's not working in their organization. Okay? Their boss is

25:32

doing something that they don't like or they even think that what the boss is doing is injurious

25:37

to a project they're working on. Right? And so taking responsibility would be generating power

25:42

and going to the boss and say, hey. When you're doing x, it makes it more difficult for me to

25:47

do what we said we wanna do. Right? But that's scary. You're talking to your boss. You're exposing

25:53

yourself. The boss may say, no. May you know, may may you may be wrong, actually. Or, You know,

26:00

the boss has authority over years, so there might be some threat there. So the person will rationalize.

26:07

I'm not gonna do it because it's his responsibility to do the do the things right. It's not

26:12

me to tell him what to do. Right. That's a classic sense of abdicating responsibility, giving

26:20

up power, you know, giving up power to your boss We're giving you a part of the situation because

26:26

you're afraid of feeling uncomfortable. Right? That's, again, Episode 2 is where we have to

26:33

build courage here. Does that answer your question or are you thinking of something else?

26:39

No. I mean, that that answers the question. But I'm also was thinking of, you know, oftentimes

26:46

when we rationalize a way A behavior. Right? To make it right. But let's say there's something,

26:54

you know, that, I I guess a real world tangible, example of how somebody rationalizes away Giving

27:05

away or not wanting to take responsibility. Like, I can't possibly take responsibility for this

27:11

because of x, y, and z. Like, this. It just isn't my responsibility to take responsibility for

27:18

because it's for somebody else. So you mentioned that boss, employee relationship. But what

27:23

about, like, on a peer to peer level? Because even with power, you know, the ability to make

27:29

things happen. Just because you're not in an authoritative role, doesn't mean you can't be a

27:33

leader to to make things happen. So on a peer to peer level, what would that look like?

27:41

Yeah. So so a common example is when when one of your peers, you know, maybe a friend, a coworker,

27:49

does something that you don't like or think is wrong, and you don't talk to them about it. You

27:55

don't sit down and have a good kind you know, a good conversation about what didn't work, about

28:00

what that person did, what your concerns are around that, and, you know, making a request to

28:05

do something different or to stop that behavior. And the rationalization will be, usually, we

28:11

go into victimhood. Right? I'm a victim. He's injured me or he's doing something wrong to me.

28:17

But the a rationalization there could be that it's none of my business. Right? Or he's mean

28:25

or what we start doing is going to these what are what we call cognitive distortions. We start

28:31

exaggerating the threat. Right. So we could catastrophize. If I go to the if I go to Joe and

28:38

I'm telling him that what he did, didn't work for me, He's gonna get really angry and break

28:43

off the friendship. You know, that's catastrophizing. Or, you know, real catastrophizing. He's

28:48

gonna slug me. You know, that could be catastrophizing. Another really common rationalization

28:55

is we we do mind reading. We think we know what other somebody else is thinking. Right. And

29:02

that mind reading, like, I could say, I think that, Joe was just doing the best he could or

29:09

Joe Joe was thinking that he was trying to help me. That mind reading often gives us permission

29:15

not to act. Right. We think we know what somebody else is thinking, and what we think we know

29:23

gives us permission not to act. It's another way of giving up power. So those are 2 really common

29:31

kinds of rationalizations. Those are really great points. Having listened to everything, and I'm and I'm just thinking

29:38

here, if I'm listening to this for the first time, never hearing about it, never never really

29:42

thinking about it. And I go, you know what? If I'm gonna retain power in my life and, you know,

29:47

I gotta take responsibility, and then I gotta think about the results that I want and then act

29:52

accordingly to achieve that outcome. So you're you're kind of asking a lot of somebody, how

29:57

do I start that week today. Like, what is there is there a tool that I can use right now today

30:04

to put that into effect and start that?

30:08

There is. There's one thing I'd like to catch in your language there, if I could. You said,

30:13

how do I retain power? Yeah. You said, how do I retain power? I like to swap out retain for

30:18

generate. Right? Because you may not have power to begin with. How do we generate power? How

30:23

do we create power? Right. How do we be powerful? Right? So it's a generative process as opposed

30:30

to a retaining process, Which I see is a little bit more passive. Step 1 step 1 is Ask yourself,

30:41

am I in any situation where you're not getting the results you want in your life, Whatever it

30:49

is with your boss, with your spouse, with your kids, you know, with with, you know, with your

30:53

bloody car, you know, it's breaking down all the time. The question to ask is, okay. What am

31:01

I doing to to contribute to this situation and what can I do to change or mitigate the situation?

31:09

Right? So this the question starts with what can I do? As soon as you say this person's responsible

31:16

or that person needs to do this, you're giving up power. You're making somebody else, when you're

31:25

making somebody else responsible for the for the results, you're giving away your power.

31:30

No. That makes perfect sense. So I I kinda wanna to to wrap this up, here and and kind of go

31:39

over a couple of things. And you laid out a really, really good, framework on how to generate

31:47

power and and start and and put that into practice and exercise today. And then you make a really

31:55

great point of you have to practice this. Right? You have it has to be a conscious thought starting

32:00

today Moving forward, you have to be intentional about your thought process and you have to

32:05

be intentional about what you're doing. So if you were to summarize this up And a quick, you

32:11

know, 1 minute to 45 second, how would you summarize, today's episode?

32:17

Alright. To be a leader, you need to be powerful. Powerful does not mean force or domination

32:24

or authority. Power is something that only you can generate for yourself or you give up or surrender.

32:32

No one can take it from you. Alright? Understand that. You're you're only person who can generate

32:40

power for yourself, and you're the only one who can surrender or give it away to someone else.

32:45

So step number 2 then is to be a cause in every area of your life. Or to take out the jargon,

32:53

Everywhere that you're getting getting results, you see what it is that I'm producing that that

32:59

produces those results, what I'm doing to produce those results. But more importantly, every

33:03

area where you're not getting results you want, you wanna ask yourself, what am I doing that's

33:09

not getting results that I want and what do I need to do in order to get those results. Right?

33:15

That's the essence of power. What can I do? What do I need to do to get the results I want?

33:22

That's the essence. Okay? Anytime you see yourself blaming somebody else, assigning responsibility

33:32

elsewhere for the your results, whatever, even if it's Whether it's God or whatever, as soon

33:38

as you're doing that, you're surrendering power. Right? And I'm not gonna say there's anything

33:43

good or bad about surrendering power. It's just that you're gonna get different results in your life.

33:48

No. Absolutely. And I really appreciate that. And and Russell, thank you for being on the show,

33:53

and thank you for doing this 4 part miniseries with us. I would like to ask everybody, if you

33:59

got value out of what Russell brought to the into the table here over the last couple weeks.

34:04

Go in the links down below. And in the links in the description of this episode, you have, his

34:09

books and you have his website for coaching. Additionally, if you listen to this and you're

34:13

like, you know what? I think I wanna be a leadership coach. Russell, you offer that, don't you?

34:18

I I offer 2 things. 1, I I certainly offer to coach leaders. If you want to be a more effective

34:25

leader, you know, come work with me. But I also offer a coach training program. The new one

34:30

will start at the end of March. And this coach training program is the most effective way to

34:35

step into your leadership. And that may may not make sense. Why does becoming a coach make me

34:41

a better leader? Good question. Give me a ring, and we'll talk about it. I absolutely guarantee

34:47

you to improve your leadership. Alright, Russell. Thank thank you for sharing that, and I hope everyone got some value out of

34:52

this. If you did get some value out of this and you wanna Ask a question or provide a comment,

34:56

please do so below. Go to YouTube, Tim State in the obvious or right below this one and and

35:01

comment on there. Or you go to timstateintheobvious com and leave a message on there. And any

35:05

messages that I get, for Russell, I will definitely pass your way on there, and I really appreciate

35:09

you coming on the show in sharing this stuff with us. So, again, thank you so

35:14

much. Hey. Thank you, Tim. As always, thank you for stopping by and checking out this episode and listening to it. I hope

35:21

that you enjoyed it. Before we go, I'd like to ask a favor of you if I could. If you could please

35:25

share this episode with 1 or 2 people who you think might like this topic. If you haven't followed

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35:43

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35:47

in the topics that we've talked about here today, but may not have found our show yet. Again,

35:51

thanks for stopping by. I'm Tim Stain, update the

35:58

obvious.