0:04

From

0:04

NPR and WBEZ

0:06

Chicago, this is Wait, Wait, Don't Tell

0:09

Me, the NPR News Quiz.

0:12

There's nothing seedy about an underbilly.

0:15

I'm Bill Curtis, and here's your host,

0:18

a man celebrating three days without

0:20

a workplace injury, Peter Segal. Thank you,

0:23

Bill. Thanks once

0:25

again to our fake audience. Later on, we're going to

0:27

be talking to author Marlon James,

0:29

who's written an epic fantasy series

0:32

based on African folklore. You need

0:34

to

0:34

read them now, so by the time the inevitable

0:37

HBO series comes out, you're ready to be insufferable

0:40

about how the books were better. We want to

0:42

get your comments on our source material, so

0:44

give us a call. The number is 1-888-Wait, wait, that's

0:46

1-888-924-8924. Now,

0:48

let's welcome our first listener contestant. Hi,

0:51

you're on Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me.

0:52

Hello, this is Fred Denwiddie. Hi

0:54

Fred, where are you calling from? I'm Bradyville, Tennessee.

0:57

And what do you do there, sir? Well,

1:00

right now for Cash Flow,

1:03

I'm a temporary worker for International

1:05

Warehouse. Yeah. And also,

1:07

since we moved to a really rural

1:10

area on 17 acres, trying

1:12

to establish a permaculture farm.

1:14

Well, that's great. Peter, I'd

1:16

like to jump in for a moment because I'm taken with

1:18

Fred. I'd like to get his

1:21

email and build an entire

1:23

podcast around that voice and

1:25

that accent. Oh, wow. It is

1:27

something.

1:28

I mean, I guess it's agriculture's

1:31

gain, sir, but it is voiceover's loss. Well,

1:35

well. You can do both, Fred. Well,

1:37

I hear that all the time about my voice,

1:39

and I don't really understand that,

1:41

but I'm pursuing, I'm studying

1:44

guitar and I'm near Nashville,

1:46

so. Yeah. Well, Fred, it is

1:48

a pleasure, it is literally a pleasure to

1:50

talk to you. Oh, thank you. But let me

1:52

introduce you to our panel, first comedian

1:54

and host of the podcast, fake the nation.

1:57

You can see her at Purdue University

1:58

in Indianapolis. on March 1st, Nageen

2:01

Farsad. Hey Fred,

2:03

how's it going? I'm fine, how are

2:05

you? Next, an actor and writer

2:07

who'll be appearing in the upcoming play, Goodnight

2:09

Oscar, starring Sean Hayes at the Goodman

2:11

Theater in Chicago, March 12th through April 17th.

2:14

It's Peter Gross. Hi, Peter. Hi,

2:16

Peter. And

2:20

making her debut on our panel, she's a

2:22

writer for Adult Swim's, Alabama Jackson,

2:24

which premiered this week on YouTube. And she's the

2:26

host of the podcast TV, I say. It's

2:29

Ashley Ray.

2:29

Hello. Hi Fred.

2:32

With that voice, please tell me about your

2:34

acreage anytime. Hi Ashley. I'm

2:38

on Facebook, so. Oh, you're welcome.

2:41

Okay. Well, welcome to

2:43

the show, Fred. You're gonna play Who's Bill this time.

2:45

Bill Curtis is gonna read you three quotations from

2:47

this week's news. If you can correctly

2:49

identify or explain two of them, you'll win our prize.

2:51

Any voice from our show, you might choose in your voicemail. You ready

2:54

to go? Sure. Okay. Here's

2:56

your first quote.

2:57

Let's snow for the gold. That

2:59

was one of Elite Daily's 35 captions

3:02

guaranteed to get you Instagram likes

3:05

when

3:05

you are posting about what

3:07

big event that wraps up this weekend.

3:10

The Olympics. The Olympics. That's

3:12

right, Fred. In 2022, Beijing

3:15

Winter Olympics are coming to a close. It was an amazing,

3:18

thrilling Olympics, especially for the 18 people who

3:20

actually watched it because they will be able

3:22

to lord it over the rest of us forever. There

3:24

was drama, victory, heartbreak. For example,

3:27

this is true, a skier was a shoo-in

3:29

for the gold medal when he suddenly went

3:32

the wrong way. Uphill? Well,

3:34

he wasn't a downhill skier, but wouldn't

3:37

it have been cool if he were? Well, okay,

3:39

I guess they

3:40

want me to climb back up. That's new. Did

3:43

you guys watch the Olympics at all? Oh, absolutely

3:45

not. I really just consider it

3:48

the thing that interrupts new episodes

3:50

of comedy TV. Like that's, I'm

3:52

like, where are the new episodes of things? And then it's like,

3:54

oh, the Olympics is happening. right and then they're

3:56

not very funny i can't help but notice

3:58

now now Uh... It was a very

4:00

strange Olympics to watch because once again, there

4:02

were no crowds in all the stadiums because of

4:04

COVID. This was the

4:07

Olympics for you if you like watching sports

4:09

with an audience that's just other athletes texting. It's

4:11

like an improv

4:12

show. A little bit. So

4:16

few people watch these Olympics, in fact, we could

4:18

just make up things that you missed. Oh,

4:21

man, I loved how this time in 2022

4:23

they combined biathlon with ski

4:25

jump.

4:26

They just sat at the bottom of the jump with their rifles,

4:28

aimed them upwards and yelled, pull. Wait,

4:33

can I just say though, they're so

4:35

dangerous. And just as a mother,

4:37

I want all of these athletes

4:39

to like turn in their

4:42

skis for something a little

4:44

safe, for like a nice sport

4:46

of walking or something. Like it

4:49

is so dangerous the way they're flying

4:51

through the air and going at high speeds

4:53

and I don't need it. I'm very worried about

4:56

all of them. I'd like to see them introduce something

4:58

like a winter ultimate frisbee.

5:01

Just things that are a little more

5:02

fun, casual to watch. I'm not terrified.

5:05

Winter, like keep yourself up on your tiptoes

5:07

for a long time. Like something,

5:09

you know,

5:10

like you're basically describing

5:13

curling, you realize. I'm okay

5:15

with curling. Yeah. Yeah. There

5:18

you go. All right, Fred, here is your next

5:20

quote. I love truckers.

5:23

a sign held by a man supporting

5:25

the truckers who were protesting where? Would

5:28

it be Ottawa, Canada? Yes, Canada.

5:31

So you got it. The great Canadian trucker

5:33

convoy protest had made its way across

5:35

Canada and completely shut down

5:37

the capital. It's historic, both as

5:39

an act of protest and because it's the first time

5:41

anybody ever has said

5:44

the words, yes, we made it to

5:46

Ottawa. They

5:49

made this journey from British Columbia to Ottawa

5:51

to protest vaccine mandates, but but they also

5:53

brought an essential much needed shipment

5:55

of fresh COVID to the city.

5:59

like a giant 18-wheeler

6:02

or 50 or 100, however many, 18-wheelers,

6:06

I was listening to a story that said you can't

6:08

tow them because

6:09

it takes an hour just to hook up

6:12

the tow. So even if the cops were like, all

6:14

right, let's clear it out of here, they'd just be like, no.

6:17

And then there's nothing you can do about it. It

6:19

does suggest a great way to park wherever you

6:21

want in the city, just drive an 18-wheeler, park

6:24

wherever you like. You'll be done with your meal before

6:26

they ever tow it away, you're golden.

6:28

But I think one thing that you're

6:30

not mentioning is that Trudeau also

6:33

uses opportunity to unveil to the world

6:35

his new haircut.

6:36

I did not notice his hair. I

6:38

think he's doing like a Justin

6:40

Bieber 2015 kind of like swoop a

6:43

lot longer on one side thing.

6:46

And I feel like maybe this whole thing was just an

6:49

elaborate excuse for him to show off his quab.

6:51

Now, one of the things that

6:53

helped bring this protest to the end was

6:55

a group called the Ram Ranch Resistance.

6:58

Well, what's that you ask? Well, they

7:00

infiltrated the convoys online planning

7:03

meetings. They kind of zoom bomb them and

7:05

they repeatedly played this 2012 heavy

7:07

metal song Ram Ranch, which

7:10

is about quote 18 naked cowboys

7:12

in the extremely graphic things

7:15

they do to each other. And look, that

7:17

might have been funny the first time, but

7:19

the more they played this song, the funnier it

7:22

got. All

7:24

right, Fred, your last quote

7:26

is from the owner of a Mexican restaurant who

7:28

has started making his guacamole

7:31

with zucchini. You

7:34

have to tell people it's not guacamole.

7:37

This guy had to do this, not because he's some sort of

7:39

sadist, but thanks to a new ban on the

7:42

importation of what? There

7:44

would be avocados. It would be,

7:46

Fred. Avocados. Americans have banned

7:48

the importation of avocados from Mexico. go, yes,

7:51

you know what this means without avocado toast

7:53

to tempt them, millennials will finally

7:56

be able to buy a house. The US

7:58

has.

7:58

blocked

8:00

shipments of avocados from Mexico after

8:03

a threat was made against an American

8:05

avocado inspector there. Yes

8:08

Avocado inspector is a real

8:10

job and not just something I

8:12

say before I steal guacamole from a stranger's

8:15

plate It's alright, sir.

8:16

I'm an avocado inspector and

8:18

also was like the cartels were involved weren't

8:20

they? Well, this is the crazy thing, right? Yeah,

8:23

so if anything is I don't have any problem

8:25

Yeah,

8:28

and I I agree the avocados

8:30

deserved it. The

8:34

US only allows the importation of

8:36

avocados from Mexico after they

8:38

are inspected by American officials

8:41

in Mexico and one of these inspectors

8:43

was apparently threatened by a cartel so the US

8:46

instantly ended imports. Now it is not

8:48

an avocado cartel, it's a drug cartel,

8:51

although an avocado cartel would be kind of hilarious.

8:53

They mark their victims by putting a toothpick

8:55

through them and putting them in a glass of water on the

8:57

windowsill.

8:58

But quick question, is the cocaine

9:01

still coming through? Oh, absolutely. Absolutely.

9:04

We would never do anything. No problem.

9:05

So, coke amole is good to go. It'll

9:08

be hilarious if, you know, desperate to get

9:11

good Mexican guacamole, they started smuggling

9:14

the avocados inside kilos of

9:16

coke.

9:16

Right? Yeah,

9:19

the cocaine masks the smell of the avocado.

9:21

That's the avocado. cocaine

9:24

smuggler standing there only in a sweat and bullets

9:26

while the inspector is like poking the

9:28

kilos of coke with his knife looking for

9:30

that delto avocado. I

9:35

hope I do hope they resolve this soon because nobody

9:37

wants to eat like New Jersey avocados. Those

9:39

are just decommissioned hand grenades.

9:41

Bill,

9:44

how did Fred do in our quiz? Not only

9:46

did he win three in a row, but he began

9:48

a new career. We both

9:50

read. Congratulations. and i

9:53

think you so much thank you so much men

9:55

take care

10:01

Right now, panel, time for you to answer some questions

10:03

about this week's news. Nagin, in an email

10:06

to all its subscribers, Netflix did not

10:08

say they were raising their prices. They

10:10

said

10:10

they were doing what to them? They were

10:13

shortening, cutting off the endings

10:16

of movies.

10:17

No. It

10:19

would be great if you subscribed to

10:21

Netflix and write like eight minutes

10:23

before the end of the movie, it just stops and says, to see the

10:25

end of the movie, please upgrade

10:28

to the premium plan.

10:29

I mean, it's kind

10:31

of genius. I feel

10:33

like I'm giving Netflix a great idea.

10:35

I'll give you a hint. It's like what you're constantly

10:37

asked to do to software and you always ignore it.

10:40

Oh, upgrading? Close, so close.

10:44

Up, up. Up installing? Up,

10:46

updating. Updating, yes.

10:48

Updating. They said that the Netflix and

10:50

an email to subscribers this week, Netflix

10:52

wrote that they were quote, updating their prices in the

10:54

same way that eating tons of snack food updates your

10:56

weight because the updated

10:57

price, what do you know? We're

11:01

all going to have to pay an extra two dollars a month

11:03

for the joy of saying, wait a minute, it's not here. It's not here. Oh,

11:05

yeah. That one's on Hulu.

11:06

We do want to thank

11:09

Netflix for this new way to cushion bad news. No,

11:11

honey. I don't want a divorce. I just want to update our marriage.

11:15

They should have said that they were consciously

11:17

uncoupling from their previous rates.

11:21

I think that would have made more sense. Where

11:25

does the money go? What

11:28

happens to all that brass?

11:31

Never have got enough.

11:34

Always feeling shorter the

11:37

cash. Prices

11:39

are so darn high. Coming up, Rock

11:41

and Roll Secrets are revealed in our Bluff

11:43

the Listener game. Call 1-888-WAIT-WAIT-TO-PLAY. We'll

11:46

be back in a minute with more of Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me from

11:48

NPR.

11:53

From

11:53

NPR and WBEZ

11:55

Chicago, this is Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me

11:58

the NPR News Quiz.

11:59

I'm Bill Curtis. We are playing this week with

12:02

Ashley Rae, the game for

12:04

Saad and Peter Gross. And

12:06

here together is your host. And thanks

12:09

to an incident during the break, celebrating

12:11

zero days without a workplace

12:14

injury, it's Peter Segal.

12:16

Thank you, Bill. Right

12:18

now it's time for the Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me Bluff the listener game

12:20

call 1-888-Wait, Wait to Play Our Game in the Air.

12:23

Hi, you are on Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me.

12:25

Hi, this is Claire from Atlanta, Georgia.

12:27

Hey Claire, how are things in Atlanta?

12:29

Peachy. Peach, well that is expected.

12:32

It being the peach tree stand. Very good,

12:35

very good. That's excellent. What do you do there in Atlanta?

12:37

I work in the film and television industry as a

12:39

script supervisor. A script supervisor?

12:41

Now this is great because I've always wanted to ask this, what

12:44

does a script supervisor actually do?

12:47

Oh boy, you're going to be sorry that you asked. Basically,

12:50

my job is to protect the writer's words

12:53

that are on the page and to make sure that that's what

12:55

we see. I also help to coordinate

12:57

continuity with hair, makeup, wardrobe,

13:00

and props basically so that people show

13:02

up in the right clothes and they make sure that they hold their

13:04

coffee cup in the right hand.

13:05

Right. I mean, I had heard that,

13:07

that part of your job is to make sure that you don't cut

13:09

away from somebody who's like a patch over

13:11

their right eye and then you come back to them with the patch over their

13:13

left eye. It's like,

13:14

that's your job. Of course. Oh.

13:17

That is one of the things that I do.

13:19

So every time that somebody's patches over

13:21

the right eye in every shot, I should thank the script

13:23

supervisor. only watches

13:25

pirate movies. That's it. That's all I did.

13:27

That's so you know. That's it. Also

13:29

apparently very poorly made pirate movies, given

13:32

how often the eye patch is jumping around. Budget pirate

13:34

movies is his favorite genre. That's my genre. Everybody

13:36

has a thing. Well, welcome to the

13:38

show. You're going to play the game in which you must tell truth

13:40

from fiction. Bill, what's Claire's topic?

13:43

Secrets of the Rock and Roll Hall of

13:45

Fame.

13:46

Did you know, for example,

13:48

that the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame's beloved

13:50

wax sculpture of Keith Richards is actually

13:53

Keith Richard. That's just

13:55

one of the shocking secrets of the

13:58

world's biggest rock stars. panels are going to tell you

13:59

another one, pick the one who's telling the truth, who

14:02

will win the weight waiter of your choice on your voicemail.

14:04

Are you ready to play? Let's go. All

14:06

right, let's do it. Let's hear first from Nagine Farsad.

14:09

Okay. You know how Radiohead

14:11

is one of the most lauded bands in the world

14:14

known for being consummate musicians

14:16

wielding their instruments to incredible

14:18

effect? Well, turns

14:20

out the keyboarders for the band didn't even

14:23

actually play his keyboard the

14:25

first several months he joined the band.

14:27

That's right. Greenwood, now Oscar

14:30

nominated for his score on Power of the Dog, would

14:32

secretly turn off his keyboard during

14:34

rehearsals for several months. His

14:37

fingers were essentially lip-syncing on a piano,

14:39

except no sound came out. So I guess

14:42

it's more accurate to say that his fingers were air-tapping,

14:44

which is like a way less cool version of air-guitaring,

14:47

which is also very uncool. You

14:50

see, once Greenwood got in the band,

14:52

he realized the guitars were so loud

14:54

no one would even notice if he didn't play.

14:57

It worked. At one point, frontman Tommy

14:59

York actually said to him, quote, I

15:02

can't hear what you're doing, but I think you're

15:04

adding a really interesting texture because I can tell

15:06

when you're not playing, which he

15:08

could not

15:09

because Greenwood was never playing.

15:12

Johnny Greenwood, the keyboardist for Radiohead

15:14

reveals that during his first months with the

15:16

band, he never actually played

15:18

his instrument

15:19

and they loved it. Your next

15:22

story about a rock and roll

15:24

secret comes from Ashley Rae. Fab

15:27

Five Freddy told me everybody's fly,

15:29

DJ Spinin' I Said, My My. Thus

15:33

begins what has recently been revealed to

15:35

be the most influential hip hop song in

15:37

history. Performed by Rock and Roll

15:39

Hall of Famers Blondie in 1981, the

15:42

single Rapture may just seem like exceptionally

15:45

white lead singer Debbie Harry trying out

15:47

some rhymes, but as it turns out, with that

15:49

song she became the founding

15:51

goddess of a whole new art form. Ms.

15:53

Harry recently revealed that the late Tupac

15:56

Shakur wrote her a letter detailing

15:58

the impact of Rapture.

15:59

saying that his track, California Love,

16:02

a song about the city of LA's ability

16:04

to party, was inspired by Harry's

16:07

quote, classic fun, tough

16:09

and freestyling flow unquote. While

16:12

Dr. Dre and his friends who formed NWA

16:15

sought out producer Fab Five Freddy because

16:17

quote, anybody name checked by

16:19

Blondie has got to be the real deal unquote.

16:22

Harry stated that she decided to keep the

16:24

praise from Tupac and other seminal artists

16:27

a secret, not wanting to involve herself

16:29

in the nation's dangerous East Coast-West

16:31

Coast rivalry at the time,

16:33

but was inspired by this year's Super

16:35

Bowl performance to share her role in

16:37

this piece of history.

16:39

It turns out that Debbie Harry

16:42

from Blondie was the seminal figure

16:44

in the creation of hip-hop.

16:46

Your last shocker about a rocker

16:48

comes from Peter Gross. This week we

16:50

learned the biggest news to come out of New Jersey

16:52

since Aaron Burr shot Alexander Hamilton

16:54

and Weehawken.

16:55

Bruce Springsteen isn't from there. The

16:58

boss gave a candid interview with the Newark Star Ledger

17:00

this week in which he admitted he was actually born

17:02

Bryce Springsworth in Darien,

17:04

Connecticut, where he attended the prestigious

17:07

Chode Rosemary Hall private school and later

17:09

Dartmouth College on a polo scholarship.

17:12

But when launching his music career, Bryce went shopping

17:14

for a new identity. He recalls,

17:16

my butler mentioned that I should try to come across

17:19

as more working class or was it my driver?

17:21

No, I remember it. It was Montague, one of my valets.

17:24

Bryce kept up the ruse

17:26

for years, but it was tough. Whenever some critic

17:28

described me as a working-class poet, he

17:30

said, I would nearly spit out my caviar

17:33

and disgust. I wouldn't actually spit

17:35

it out, of course, it's caviar after all. Bruce

17:37

told the Star Ledger he was writing from a place of truth,

17:40

though, and you just have to replace the words

17:42

factory with country club and car

17:44

with dressage horse. He concluded

17:47

the interview by saying one thing that is true, New

17:49

Jersey is indeed a death trap and a suicide

17:51

rap, and I strongly recommend people getting

17:53

out of there while they're young.

17:55

All right, so here are your choices. We learned something

17:57

interesting about a pretty well-known

18:00

act this

18:02

week. Was it from Nageen

18:04

Farsad that Johnny Gainwood, the composer

18:06

and keyboardist for Radiohead, never

18:08

even played his instrument while trying out for the band

18:11

and got in the band? From

18:14

Ashley Rae that Debbie Harry

18:16

from Blondie

18:17

helped found hip-hop by influencing

18:20

the greats of that genre? Or

18:22

from Peter Gross that Bruce Springsteen

18:25

is really a rich kid from Connecticut.

18:28

Oh gosh. As someone

18:31

who would love to be in a rock band

18:33

but can't play an instrument

18:35

to save their life, I really hope it's me.

18:37

Alright, that's your choice.

18:39

Well, to find out the correct answer, let's hear

18:41

from the musician in question. When I got

18:43

the chance to play with them, the first thing I did

18:45

was make sure my that

18:50

was Johnny Greenwood himself talking to Terry

18:53

Gross on fresh air about how he faked it

18:55

till he made it with Radiohead.

18:57

Congratulations, you were correct. Nagin

18:59

was telling you the truth.

19:01

Congrats. And you have won our prize, the

19:04

voice of anyone you might like from our show

19:06

on your voicemail. Thank you. Take care.

19:17

And now the game where people who have won prestigious

19:20

awards try to win something very different.

19:22

It's called Not My Job. Like a lot of people who love epic

19:25

fantasy fiction, Booker Award-winning

19:27

author Marlon James wondered why stories

19:29

like Game of Thrones or Lord of the Rings take

19:31

place in fantastical fictional worlds with

19:34

magic and dragons, but somehow the

19:36

demographics of a Greenwich, Connecticut PTA

19:38

meeting. His new series of fantasy books

19:40

changes all of that. The second volume is out now.

19:42

Marlon James, welcome to Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me. Oh

19:45

my God, thanks for having me. It's my pleasure.

19:47

So

19:49

I want to get to the books, but

19:52

I want to talk to you about your background. We heard

19:55

that,

19:55

again, you have won the Booker Prize. You are a serious

19:58

guy. your first novel. was

20:00

rejected 78 times? It

20:02

was. It was. It was,

20:05

and I actually burned it. I did this

20:07

sort of ritual burning. It was like a Viking burial.

20:10

It was very cleansing, I gotta tell you, until

20:13

somebody showed up a year later and she was like, I'm

20:15

not leaving this country until you give me that book. Wow.

20:18

So I had to find a thing. So things

20:20

you should know if you don't know, if you deleted something

20:23

a year ago, Undelete does not bring it

20:25

back. No, no, good to know.

20:27

in case y'all did not know that. So

20:29

Control Z has a Not gonna happen. Not

20:31

gonna happen. A statute of limitations. Well, before

20:34

we get to that, I just want to talk to you. So you write this novel, and

20:36

you send it to a publisher, an agent, whomever, and they

20:39

reject it, and that happens again. So you get to 10,

20:41

you

20:41

get to 20 rejections. How

20:43

do you, what do you tell yourself after 20 rejections?

20:47

I'm gonna keep going. Well, you do it by not knowing you have 20

20:49

rejections. So the thing is, I always send it out in

20:51

that batches of six. Right. And

20:53

if I didn't hear from anybody, well, that's a six.

20:56

whatever, I just find six more names

20:58

and I sent it out. And it wasn't until this

21:01

press sent me the Not

21:03

For Us card. They gave me right to the letters,

21:05

but the card says Not For Us. And

21:08

I was able to send out the next batch and

21:10

I just stopped and thought, how many of these have

21:12

I done?

21:13

And

21:15

so you sort of realized like, oh

21:17

my God, that's a lot

21:20

of rejections. I was a reverse

21:22

Sally Field. I was like, hey, hey, hey, hey.

21:25

So

21:27

I love that you were rejected

21:29

so many times. Do people say that to

21:31

you? I think it's just

21:34

awesome. It's inspiring.

21:35

People, but I have students like,

21:38

oh my God, my story was rejected four times. I'm

21:40

like, oh, sweetie.

21:43

You got 74 more to go. Okay.

21:46

And have you ever heard from any of those

21:48

people who rejected any of the 78? Oh yeah. Do

21:51

they? What do they say? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I

21:53

write into somebody who at one time was at, I think he was a

21:56

random host. I forgot his name, which is

21:58

a polite thing to say.

21:59

You

22:02

have the name, it's on a list somewhere. And

22:05

he was like, oh my God, you're a novel.

22:07

Oh my God, I still think about it. I couldn't, I

22:09

can't forget it. So why didn't you publish

22:11

it then? It was like five years later, you're

22:14

still telling me how you couldn't forget the book.

22:16

He's like, I had so many of these not for us

22:18

cards. I needed to do something with

22:20

them. That's kind of an amazing story. And so

22:23

eventually you left Jamaica and you ended up in

22:25

Minnesota, where you've been teaching

22:28

at McAllister College. fine institution

22:30

there. And how was the transition from Kingston,

22:32

Jamaica to St. Paul, Minnesota? Oh,

22:35

it was a breeze. Absolutely. From 90 degrees

22:37

to minus 90 degrees, I mean. But

22:44

yeah, it's funny, my high school yearbook

22:46

says in the pictures,

22:49

ambition to work for Prince. Oh yeah.

22:51

The music, not an actual Prince, but the musician. Yeah.

22:54

So it's always funny when I moved to Minnesota

22:56

and I remind the people from high I stood like, guess where

22:58

I'm living? I get, no.

23:00

And then it was, are you working for

23:02

Prince? I'm like, no, I'm not working for Prince. Well,

23:04

but you can let them know. They live in Jamaica. You

23:06

can let them know that you see Prince all the time. Well,

23:09

I did try to break into his house. You did? Oh,

23:11

yeah.

23:12

It was my 38th birthday. What else am I going to do? Makes

23:16

sense to me. So what happened? Yeah, we

23:18

all got in this car, and we drove to Chanhassen,

23:20

which is not near Minneapolis, by the way.

23:22

No, it's way out there.

23:23

It's way out there. So we had a lot of time

23:26

to realize was a bad idea. We

23:28

drove all the way up to Paisley Park

23:30

and we got all the cars and we're going to scale

23:33

the gates. You are kidding me.

23:35

Oh yeah, I pretty much hit the gate

23:37

and then all the alarms went off. How

23:40

drunk were you guys?

23:42

We were pretty

23:45

drunk, but not drunk enough to start screaming,

23:47

we're English professors, we're English professors.

23:51

So it was you and a bunch of other tipsy

23:54

English professors from McCartman.

23:59

So the alarms go off. Yeah.

24:02

And then the security showed up.

24:04

And for some reason, they believed us and we said, we're

24:07

English professors because who else would

24:09

come up with a lie that lame? That's

24:11

true.

24:13

And yeah, and we ended up talking

24:15

to them the rest of the night. Really? And

24:18

it was surreal. It still ended up

24:20

being a pretty cool birthday. Yeah. Prince

24:22

didn't show up though. All right. Let's

24:25

talk about your trilogy. The first book was Black

24:27

Leopard, Red Wolf. And you

24:30

decided you wanted to do something but using

24:32

African myth and folklore. Is that right? Right. And

24:34

of course because you were writing a fantasy novel, it has

24:36

to be a trilogy. That's the rule. That

24:38

is the rule. I'm just gonna write the Tetralogy.

24:41

Oh really? Do you know yet? Because I've read

24:43

the... No,

24:43

no, I'm definitely not writing before. Right. You

24:45

know, you realize that that's what George RR Martin said.

24:47

He was gonna write a trilogy. That's what he said and that's what he told

24:49

me. I'm like, it's not happening. So

24:52

you've obviously you've met George RR Martin, the author of Game

24:54

of Thrones books. Did he give you any advice on being a successful

24:57

fantasy author?

24:58

No, I think we talked about shoes.

25:00

We had dinner. What

25:03

does it be talk about? It sounds like you guys

25:06

didn't talk about the ending of Game

25:08

of Thrones. No, and

25:10

I got issues with that, didn't I? Really? I

25:12

actually didn't watch the final season of Game

25:15

of Thrones because I was so upset. Really?

25:17

With the world in which we live in,

25:20

right?

25:20

In which fantasy, science fiction, comic

25:23

books are so huge. so huge. You've got to be imagining,

25:25

you know, the HBO series, the big film

25:28

adaptation. Is that like a thing you think about?

25:30

Yeah, kind of.

25:33

I mean, people ask, as we, you know, have I thought

25:35

of who would star in it? And I

25:37

like to be like all sort of literary

25:40

author. Like, no, I haven't thought of that. I'm such a BS.

25:42

Of course I've thought

25:44

of that. I did on everything. I probably want

25:46

to play a tree in that show.

25:48

Well,

25:50

Marlon James, it is an absolute joy to talk

25:52

to you. We have asked you here this time though to play a game

25:54

we're calling. In this epic fantasy,

25:57

the Buffalo Bills won the

25:59

Super Bowl.

25:59

So you

26:02

write epic fantasy. So we thought we'd ask you

26:04

about fantasy football. And

26:06

so you're two to three questions correctly. You'll win our prize

26:09

for one of our listeners, the voice of their choice on their voicemail.

26:11

Bill, who is Marlon James playing for?

26:13

Andrew Levy of Portland, Oregon. Here's

26:15

your first question. Fantasy football was created

26:18

in 1962 by a man named Bill

26:20

Winkenbach, who was a part owner

26:23

of the Oakland Raiders NFL team. What

26:25

was his reason for creating fantasy football? A,

26:28

the Raiders were so terrible he wanted to

26:30

at least pretend he owned a good team. B,

26:33

he realized there were three hours a week in which

26:35

he was awake and yet wasn't thinking about

26:37

football. Or C, he wanted a

26:39

version of football in which the players would be armed

26:42

with swords.

26:43

Well, I mean, I used to really

26:45

like these LA rap

26:47

groups who were Raiders captain. I was like, is

26:49

that a good team? And I was like, oh, they're terrible. Right.

26:52

So I'm going to get Google answer

26:54

one. That's exactly right. He was so frustrated

26:56

with the vaccine. That's

27:00

right. I skew to thank for that.

27:02

Yeah,

27:03

yeah. I skew. All right. Here's

27:05

your next question. The most important

27:07

part of a fantasy football league is draft

27:09

day where the players in the league get to pick their players

27:12

from the real NFL rosters. A man

27:14

named Steve shrub was so committed

27:17

to

27:17

getting his draft right that

27:19

he did what a dumpster dived

27:21

outside of NFL stadiums to look look for discarded

27:23

medical records. B stated his

27:26

computer managing his draft

27:27

during a missile attack on Bagram Air

27:30

Force Base in Afghanistan where he was serving,

27:32

where C invented his own fake news organization

27:35

so he could score interviews with players. Um,

27:39

I'm gonna go with Baghdad.

27:40

Not Baghdad, but Bagram and you're right.

27:42

Yes. He was an active duty

27:45

guy sitting at his desk in Bagram. There was an air

27:47

raid. Everybody ran to the shelters and

27:49

he was like, drafts going on he says you

27:51

know that rockets at fifty yards away he was fine

27:54

arm

27:55

last question well um...

27:57

fantasy football

27:59

just like real football. has its scandals

28:01

once the commissioner of a fantasy football

28:03

league was caught cheating all of his

28:05

players just so he could win.

28:07

Even worse was what? A,

28:10

he injected himself with horse testosterone,

28:12

but it turns out that only helps real football players.

28:15

B, the league was entirely made up of pro cyclists

28:18

and that commissioner was Lance Armstrong.

28:21

Or C, he and everyone else in that league

28:23

were pastors. I

28:26

mean, Lance Armstrong is connected to some

28:28

dirty stuff. Yes.

28:30

I can't imagine that they

28:32

were pastors. I'm going to go with number

28:35

one. You're going to go with a horse tranquilizer. No, I'm

28:37

afraid it was actually, they were all pastors.

28:39

It was a league in a

28:41

big mega church in Oklahoma. Look at me. Can

28:44

I even recognize the holy? I know.

28:47

It's terrible. Bill, how did Marlon

28:49

James do in our quiz?

28:50

Marlon, you got two out of three and here,

28:52

that is a win. Congratulations.

28:56

Wow. There you go. Marlon

28:58

James' newest book is Moon Witch, Spider-King.

29:01

It's the second in his planned trilogy of

29:03

fantasy books. It's amazing. I recommend

29:05

it. Marlon James, thank you so much for joining us on

29:07

Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me. I'm really enjoying the books. Thank

29:10

you so much for having me, guys. Take care, man.

29:12

You're great. Thanks, Marlon.

29:18

In just a minute, Heinz, as a new challenger and

29:20

our listener, Limerick Challenge, called 1-888-Wait, Wait,

29:23

Wait to join us in the air. We'll be back in a minute with

29:25

more of Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me from NPR.

29:32

From NPR and WBEZ

29:34

Chicago, this is Wait, Wait, Don't Tell

29:36

Me the NPR News

29:38

Quiz. I'm Bill Curtis. We're playing

29:41

this week with Meghin Farsad, Peter

29:43

Gross, and Ashley Ray. And

29:45

here again is your host, Now broadcasting

29:48

from Del Rio, Texas, where

29:50

he is currently being detained for

29:52

smuggling avocados. Thank you,

29:55

Bill. Thank you, Bill. Thank you,

29:57

Bill. in just a minute, Bill demands right

29:59

numera-

29:59

In our listener limerick challenge if you'd

30:02

like to play give us a call at 1 triple 8 wait wait

30:04

That's 1-888-924-8924 right now panel

30:06

some more questions for you from

30:08

the week's news Peter a

30:11

nuclear engineer for the Navy decided

30:13

to sell secrets to somebody he thought was a foreign

30:15

agent and at one point he Had highly

30:17

classified American state secrets

30:20

in a what? But

30:24

no not in a but Very

30:26

good guess that okay. Can I have a hint

30:29

for where? Yes Yes, you can have a hand. It is terrible

30:31

when the nuclear weapon specs stick

30:33

to the roof of your mouth.

30:35

Oh, I saw this. He hid

30:37

the secrets in a jar of peanut butter? Close

30:39

enough in a peanut butter sandwich. In

30:41

a sandwich. Specifically half a peanut

30:44

butter sandwich. So a Navy engineer named Jonathan

30:46

Toby wanted to sell state secrets and he was

30:48

contacted by an FBI agent posing as a

30:50

foreigner. Toby, who missed obvious

30:52

signs such as Saudi shakes are

30:54

not usually named Jeff. He

30:57

proceeded to pass on these nuclear

30:59

secrets, including at one point hiding a flash

31:01

drive inside half a peanut butter sandwich,

31:04

right? And he

31:05

left the peanut butter sandwich in a public place,

31:07

so the supposed foreign agent can pick it up, but

31:09

it disappeared. In other news, the squirrels

31:12

of Annapolis, Maryland are now a nuclear

31:14

power.

31:15

I

31:17

wonder why a peanut butter sandwich,

31:19

I think I would have gone with a meatball sub,

31:21

maybe an Italian

31:24

sub, just

31:24

some. At least be a sub. Yeah, I know if

31:26

you're gonna if you're gonna sell naval secrets

31:28

you need to use a summary You

31:31

make the cut

31:31

you make the obvious pun Or

31:34

you get a sandwich that nobody wants you get

31:36

like a liverwort the subway

31:39

tuna Yeah, the subway tuna sandwich

31:41

you leave it there and then like a year later. It's still

31:44

there cuz nobody's Yeah,

31:46

even the seagulls are like I don't know man.

31:48

What is that stuff? I'd rather eat

31:50

that flash drive

31:51

Peter,

31:54

Canadian doctors are ditching, quote unquote,

31:57

medicine and prescribing what

31:59

to to their patients. instead. Peter,

32:02

laughter. Just laughter.

32:04

Just joy. Just joy. I'll give you a

32:06

hand. It's like, here, take two magnificent

32:09

vistas of the Canadian Rockies and call me in the morning.

32:11

Getting out and traveling? Yeah,

32:13

they're giving them passes to national parks.

32:16

As a kind of therapy. Doctors in

32:18

Canada are prescribing people national park

32:21

passes, because seriously, what can't

32:23

a trip to Banff cure? Well,

32:26

cancer. It

32:27

absolutely cannot cure cancer. The

32:29

initiative is meant to help people enjoy

32:32

the curative and preventative aspects of being

32:34

in the great outdoors. Everybody knows that's good. Plus,

32:36

it's a great scam for doctors. Nothing gets more patients

32:39

in the door like telling people to go on a strenuous

32:41

hike for the first time ever. Oh, you're back already,

32:43

Jim. Broken ankle, eh?

32:46

Yeah, for what maladies

32:48

are these things? I think

32:51

mainly for mental health. Yeah, I can't

32:53

think of anything better for mental illness and

32:55

depression than being alone in the woods. It

32:58

sounds great. Yeah. If

33:00

this were in America, of course, the

33:03

makers of the parks would be taking it like medical ads

33:05

for it on TV and they'd have to lift the side effects.

33:08

Side effects may include bear attacks.

33:10

Sighing off your own arm after

33:13

it gets caught under a boulder. Ask

33:15

your doctor about Yellowstone. Not

33:18

the TV show. Ask your parents about that.

33:32

Coming up, it's lightning fill in the blank, but

33:34

first it's the game where you have to listen for the rhyme.

33:37

If you'd like to play on air, call or leave a message

33:39

at 1-888-Wait-Wait. That's

33:42

1-888-924-8924. Or click the Contact Us link on our

33:44

website, waitwait.npr.org. You

33:46

can also find tickets for upcoming shows March

33:49

3rd at the Fox Theatre in Atlanta April 7th

33:51

at the Harris Theatre in Chicago and two shows

33:54

at WolfTrap on August 25th and 26th We

33:57

will notice if you're not there

33:59

Hi, Ron. Don't tell me. Hi, this

34:01

is Karina from San Clemente, California. San

34:04

Clemente, California, famous as being

34:06

the home of Richard Nixon. It sure is,

34:09

and a lot of surfing. That's why Nixon

34:11

moved there. I see those pictures of Nixon

34:13

surfing in his dress shoes. It was really

34:15

something. It was his style. What do you do there

34:17

in San Clemente? I'm a hydrogeologist,

34:20

so I work

34:21

on a lot of groundwater remediation

34:23

projects. Right. And are

34:25

you worried that it being California

34:27

in an apical drought that you're going to

34:29

be out of work anytime soon?

34:31

No, actually the work is only

34:33

ramping up since there's less and less of

34:35

it and more and more of it is getting contaminated. You

34:38

have to fix that problem before it's too

34:40

late.

34:41

Right. I was about to say that if we run out

34:43

of water, you hydrogeologists will be out of work,

34:45

but that really would be at that point the least of

34:47

our problems. That's a good point. Yeah.

34:51

Well, welcome to the show, Karina. Bill Curtis is going to read

34:53

you three news-related lemmorix with

34:55

a last word or phrase missing from each. that

34:57

last word or phrase correctly on two of the lemmarks will

34:59

be a winner. Ready to play?

35:01

Ready. Let's do it then. Here's your first lemric.

35:04

We cows are acutely aware

35:06

that food science has answered

35:09

our prayer. Now carbon

35:11

dioxide is saving our backside.

35:14

This steak

35:16

is made out of thin air.

35:18

Yes, a company called Air

35:21

Coaching is taking carbon dioxide and

35:23

turning it into a fleshy meat substitute

35:26

by feeding it to microbes and then grinding

35:28

up those microbes into a kind of flower. Now,

35:31

once they have this

35:32

flesh flower, they use quote, culinary

35:35

techniques to make it look and taste like steak or chicken

35:37

or salmon. I'd say they're making meat out of thin

35:39

air, but it's really kind of more out of thick air.

35:42

If you know what I mean?

35:43

I want to say out the gate, it sounds

35:45

delicious. Every time there's some sort of

35:47

like, what if we did this with pollutants

35:50

or carbon dioxide? I'm like, that is good

35:52

that it helps, but it's just going to

35:55

make people be like, well, it's cool, then we can like keep

35:57

polluting, right? People are gonna like make me data.

35:59

like I'll just like, not get rid of my car and

36:01

like leave my lawnmower on all day. I'll buy

36:03

a Hummer because someone can just eat it someday. Yes.

36:07

All right. Here is your next limerick.

36:09

Near our town church, my headache

36:11

just swells. Quasimodo

36:14

here really excels.

36:16

But our quaint local priest must start

36:19

taming that beast. He

36:21

got fined now for ringing

36:23

the... Bell? Bells, yes.

36:26

the entire population of a small town outside

36:29

Florence, Italy, has been unable to sleep through

36:31

the night because the local priest insisted on

36:33

clanging those church bells all day. At least

36:36

that's what they say. This is clearly a case

36:38

of anti-hunchbackism. According

36:40

to residents, the deafening sound of the bells would ring

36:43

out for at least five minutes every hour, including

36:45

in the middle of the night. Even worse than that,

36:47

some mornings the priest did the thing where he knew

36:49

he had to get up at 7.30, so he set the bells to ring

36:51

at 7 and then 7.05 and then 7.07. I

36:55

don't know, it's even worst thing in the world, church

36:57

bells with the snooze button.

36:58

Maybe there was

37:00

no priest, maybe it was just a ghost. I

37:03

know, bong, bong, bong, bong, bong, bong.

37:05

Maybe it was just someone trying to make the bells

37:07

popular again. It's a really overlooked

37:09

instrument these days. Yeah, normally

37:13

from a handbell choir from junior high

37:15

school or something. No. It was

37:17

trialing. Wait, did you have a handbell

37:19

choir in junior high school? I

37:22

did not, but I do handbells. That

37:24

feels entirely made up.

37:27

Oh no. All right, we have one more limerick

37:29

for you. Here we go.

37:31

As Her Majesty's cooking a batch

37:33

up,

37:34

fresh tomatoes and dates are

37:36

the match up. And her

37:38

quaint royal seal will enhance

37:41

any meal. Queen Elizabeth

37:43

sells her own... Ketchup.

37:46

Yes. Or as they call it over there, ketchup.

37:49

Queen of England is selling her own line of ketchup

37:52

because when I think Queen, I

37:53

think dipping sauce the

37:55

Queen of England is now selling

37:58

a kind of homemade ketchup unless it should coincidence

38:00

that Pris Andrew was found completely drained

38:03

of blood. I find

38:05

this amazing, the queen, the

38:07

longest reigning queen in British history,

38:10

if not world history,

38:11

she's in her mid-90s and she decides, you know

38:13

what I'd like to do now? Sell

38:15

my own brand of condiments. Oh

38:17

my god, she's gonna be on Instagram being like, yo,

38:20

what's up everybody? Please follow

38:22

me. We're doing a

38:24

pop-up at home in

38:26

We're at the Camden farmers

38:28

market. Exactly. Bill,

38:31

how did Karina do in our quiz? She did great.

38:34

Three in a row, Karina. Congratulations.

38:37

Congratulations, Karina. Well done. Thank

38:39

you. Good luck keeping the water flowing. Thank you,

38:41

Scout, as well. Thank you. Thank

38:44

you.

39:02

Now it's time for our final game of lightning fill

39:04

in the blank. Each of our players will have 60 seconds

39:06

in which to answer as many fill in the blank questions

39:09

as they can. Each correct answer now

39:11

worth two points. Bill, can you give us the scores? Peter

39:13

has two, Ashley has two,

39:16

and Nagine, with her experience,

39:18

has four. Peter,

39:20

I am choosing you arbitrarily to go first.

39:22

So fill in the blank. The clock

39:25

will start when I begin your first question. On

39:27

Sunday, Representative Adam Kinziger said he

39:29

expects former Trump lawyer Blank to comply

39:32

with the January 6th committee. Oh, Rudy

39:34

Giuliani. Yes, Rudy Giuliani. On Tuesday, the family

39:36

of the cinematographer accidentally shot

39:38

in the set of the movie Rust filed a lawsuit

39:41

against Blank. Alec Baldwin. Yes,

39:43

this week a courthouse in Alabama was shut down after

39:45

someone called in a suspicious package that turned

39:47

out to be blank.

39:48

A Bible that someone was going

39:50

to swear on. No, two crates of food from Taco

39:52

Bell. On Wednesday, the first message was posted on

39:55

blank's new social media platform.

39:57

Trump? Yeah. On Sunday,

39:59

Aaron- A- Jackson became the first black woman to win

40:01

a blank in speed skating. Gold

40:04

medal? Yeah, gold medal. This week, the mayor of

40:06

a town in Ohio resigned following the backlash

40:08

to his statement that legalized ice

40:11

fishing leads to blank.

40:14

Heroin use? No,

40:16

prostitution. Close.

40:19

At a city council meeting, the mayor of Hudson,

40:21

Ohio, Craig Schubert, opposed

40:24

ice fishing on the the town's lake, he said, quote,

40:26

if you allow ice fishing with shanties,

40:29

then that leads to another problem, prostitution.

40:32

When asked for evidence of this, Schubert couldn't point

40:35

to any, but he did ask people to please purchase his

40:37

self published book, Cold Ice, Hot

40:39

Nights. Bill,

40:42

how did Peter do in our quiz?

40:43

Peter had four right for eight more points.

40:46

He now has 10 and the lead. Congratulations,

40:48

Peter. All right. Ashley,

40:51

you're up next. Okay. On Tuesday,

40:54

Virginia Juffrey settled her case against

40:56

Prince Blank for an undisclosed amount.

40:59

Prince Andrew. Right. On Thursday, a new

41:01

report stated that over two-thirds of the U.S. is

41:03

now immune to the Blank variant. Al Macron.

41:06

Right. This week, the White House rejected Blank's claims

41:08

that his visitor logs fall under executive privilege.

41:11

Trump. Yes. According

41:13

to a new nationwide poll, 75 percent of people back

41:15

local mandates on Blank.

41:18

Mask mandate. Yes. captain

41:21

who created the force's drug policy has resigned

41:23

after he blanked.

41:24

It did heroin. It's the

41:27

only one he didn't do. He smoked weed, dropped acid,

41:29

and tripped on mushrooms. That's

41:31

a double hippie backflip, is the appropriate

41:33

name for that. And it was my second

41:35

guess at it. On Monday, it was announced

41:37

that Wanda Sykes, Regina Hall, and Amy

41:40

Schumer would host the 2022 Blank

41:42

Awards.

41:42

Oscars. Yes, on Sunday, the Los Angeles

41:45

Rams made a late game comeback to win

41:47

the blank. The Super Bowl. Yes, this

41:49

week a Canadian woman in a town called Durham

41:51

tried to report a break-in, but she accidentally blanked.

41:54

Ordered

41:56

pizza? No, she accidentally called

41:58

the Durham, England. police. Instead

42:02

of contacting the police in Durham, Canada, the

42:05

woman accidentally messaged the Durham County Constabulary

42:08

in England, 3,500 miles away. The woman

42:10

is safe and well, thanks to the quick thinking

42:12

emergency operator over in the UK,

42:15

who asked her to stay on the line while they dispatched

42:17

an officer to Heathrow International Airport, who

42:19

then took the red eye to Canada's Waterley Airport,

42:21

and then waited at the Hertz counter for a rental car and

42:24

then drove it the 90 miles to Durham

42:26

just in time.

42:29

Bill,

42:30

how did Ashley do in her very first ever Lightning

42:32

Phil in the Black? Well, the newbie did very,

42:34

very well. She had six right for 12 more

42:37

points. She has 14 and the lead.

42:42

Good for you, Ashley, but this feels good.

42:44

This means Nagin needs how many to win?

42:47

Five to tie, six to win. All

42:49

right. Here we go, Nagin. This is for the game. Phil

42:51

in the Black. All right. On Tuesday,

42:53

a jury rejected Blank's libel suit against

42:56

the New York Times.

42:57

Sarah Palin. Right. On

42:59

Thursday, a judge ruled that Blank must testify in a civil probe

43:01

of his business practices. Trump. Yes.

43:04

And his kids. This week, US deaths from Blank exceeded

43:07

one million people.

43:08

COVID? Yeah. This

43:10

week, a man in Michigan called police to report that someone had stolen

43:12

his Blank in the middle of the night. Oh,

43:17

his jet skis. His

43:20

entire 12 by 28 foot cabin,

43:22

according to a new study, the blank currently gripping

43:24

the Southwest is the worst in 1,200 years. Drought?

43:28

Yes. According to a new filing, Elon Musk donated

43:30

nearly $6 billion worth of blank stock

43:32

to charity in 2021. Tesla? Yes.

43:36

In a basketball game this week, a student in Minnesota

43:38

made a once in a lifetime shot while standing

43:40

blindfolded at half court and won

43:42

blank. Tuition

43:45

to college? No. He

43:47

won a hat. Typically,

43:51

when they have you come out during half run and make a trick shot, they give

43:53

away like tuition to college or lots of money. So

43:56

spectators were shocked when the student blindfolded,

43:58

sunk it.

43:59

Swoosh, nothing but net. And the only thing he won

44:02

was a hat. He should have win the rules,

44:04

which said, if you get this ball anywhere in the building, other

44:06

than in a net, you get a Ferrari. Bill

44:11

didn't again do well enough to win. She had five

44:13

right for 10 more points, which means

44:15

with 14, she and Ashley are

44:18

this week's co-champions. Yeah,

44:20

Ashley. In

44:23

just a minute, we're going to ask our panelists to

44:25

predict what will be the big surprise

44:28

out of the closing ceremony in Beijing.

44:31

But before we end this week's show, I wanted

44:33

to tell you a story about a friend

44:35

of ours. Back in 2001, we had

44:37

to do our first show after 9-11.

44:40

And our guest for that show bowed out. They just didn't wanna

44:43

have to do comedy about such terrible events, but

44:45

a producer reached out to the writer P.J.

44:47

O'Rourke. P.J. specialized

44:50

in being funny about terrible things. And he came on

44:52

and was as hilarious as we hoped he would

44:54

be. So much so, we invited him to be a panelist

44:56

much to my delight he accepted. There

45:00

are a lot of stories all of us here at WaitWait could

45:02

tell you about PJ and we will someday,

45:04

but right now we want you to know that his

45:06

persona, the curmudgeonly cynic

45:08

who mocked everything and everyone,

45:10

was just that, a persona. In real

45:12

life, PJ O'Rourke was

45:15

one of the kindest, most generous, and caring

45:17

people you could ever hope to know. We will

45:19

miss him a lot, but I will quote

45:21

the man himself in a note about grief

45:24

he wrote to me after my mother

45:26

died last year. Quote,

45:29

you don't exactly get over it, an

45:31

offensive phrase under any circumstances,

45:33

but the grief in time does

45:36

turn into a nostalgic ache that

45:38

is almost comforting.

45:40

Unquote.

45:42

We are comforted already by the fact that we

45:44

were able to get to know him. Rest in

45:46

peace PJ and all condolences

45:49

to his family.

46:00

Wait, wait, don't tell me. It's a production of NPR

46:03

and WB EZ Chicago in association with urgent

46:05

haircut productions Doug Berman, Benevolent

46:07

Overlord. Philip Godica writes our limberics,

46:09

our social media superstar is Emma

46:12

Choi. BJ Leaderman composed our theme,

46:14

our program is produced by Jennifer Mills, Miles Dornbosch,

46:16

Lillian King and Nancy Seychow. Our production

46:19

assistant is Sophie Hernandez-Simionidis.

46:22

Special thanks to Vinnie Thomas, assistant

46:25

to the avocado inspector is Peter Gwynn.

46:27

Technical direction is from Lorna White, her CFO is

46:29

as Colin Miller, our production manager as Robert

46:32

Newhouse, our senior producer as Ian Chillogg, and the executive

46:34

producer of Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me is Mike

46:36

Danforth. Now panel, what will be the big

46:38

surprise out of the Winter Olympics

46:41

closing ceremonies? Nagin Farsad.

46:43

50 Cent does yet another

46:45

surprise rendition of In the Club, but this time

46:48

standing right side up. Peter

46:51

Gross. President Xi

46:53

of China will sing Closing Time by

46:55

Semi Sonic. You don't have to go

46:57

home, but you can't stay here.

47:01

And Ashley Rae.

47:03

A special Olympic Village Edition COVID

47:06

variant will be introduced. Well,

47:08

if that happens, we're gonna ask you about

47:10

it here on Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me. Thank

47:12

you, Bill Curtis. Thanks also to Nageen Farsad,

47:14

Peter Gross. And Ashley Rae, what a great debut

47:16

on our show. Thanks to all of you out there for listening. I'm

47:19

Peter Sagal. We'll see you next week.

47:23

This is NPR.