We're unveiling dark secrets this week as we look at Ron Howard's 2007 adaptation of The Da Vinci Code!

We read the book too, so we're here to dive deep into our favorite historical inaccuracies, pitch alternative castings, unveil the real (dumb) history of the Priory of Sion, and get into the DC Height Act.

Plus: Does Dan Brown know that different types of Christianity are different? Is Ron Howard not trashy enough for this? Is Robert Langdon hot? And, most critically, who exactly are the ancients???

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Next week: She's All That (1999)

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