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Hey y'all . Hey , welcome to

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the when we win podcast . I

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am your host , Kiyanna Mitchell , self-care

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advocates , wife , mother

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, grandmother , lover of all things

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black , and I'm on a mission to build

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community around sisters that look like me

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on their journey to win , cause when

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we win , we all win . Let's

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get started , hey , family

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. Welcome back to another episode

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of when we win podcast . I'm

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your host , Kiyanna Mitchell , and we have

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a great episode today . Um

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might be a little controversial , but let's

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get into it . Um , today I want

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to talk about uh minding

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, uh , minding my

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own business , reminding our own business

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and how sometimes , uh

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, keeping to that persona of minding our own business , sometimes

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we don't tell people our business and

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um and um , sometimes

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we can start to feel a little bit of isolated

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, feeling like we're the only ones going

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through a certain situation , because

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we are doing what Mining our

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own business and not telling nobody . You know what

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goes on in this house , days in this house . That also

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ties into that and

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what happens now . I feel

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like nobody else is

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going through what I'm going through Now . I

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feel alone and

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if we really got

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into it , uh , there's

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a lot of people going through

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some similar situations , especially

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like financially , uh , relational

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, uh , familial a

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lot of situations

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that are very similar , but I think sometimes

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we get ashamed , or um

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, about our situations and we don't share

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, um . We're watching people's

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social medias , um , because

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, of course , nobody's putting

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. Most people don't

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put their drama or certain situations

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on social media , so all you see are

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the happy family pictures , the

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happy lovely moments , all

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these excited . So you think everybody else's life

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is so much better than yours , um

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, when in actuality , they're probably

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suffering just like you . Okay , um

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. So I really wanted to

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um encourage , uh

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my listeners to

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open up about certain situations . Let me tell you something

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on this podcast . You are going to hear about

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my financial struggles because , honey

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, I really just

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got some sense of financial literacy

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, I want to say , probably in the

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last three years or so . Okay

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, um , I can't tell

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you how much money I have blown

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due

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to , uh , being

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financially illiterate . Okay , so

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I'm going to share those struggles , um

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, I'm going to share how I try to try

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to start two businesses and

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failed miserably

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. Okay , I am going

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to share those things now for some people . They

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may not want people to know that . They may

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not want people to know that they have felt a file break

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. Group C I have , okay

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, some people may not want

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to , uh , people to know that their kids are by

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different men . Well , I

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have six kids by three different

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men now , and some

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people may not want people to know that . Um

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, some people may not want them to know that they

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didn't graduate from high school and they got a GED . Well

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, guess what ? I got a GED . I didn't

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graduate from high school . I had two

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kids by the time I was 18 . I got

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pregnant at 16 , in my 11th grade year , so

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I never had a 12th grade year , never went to prom . Some

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people may not want other

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people to know that , but guess what ? Now

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y'all knowing that , and you see

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me eventually win

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. Now that

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lets somebody else know that , yes , you

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can go through certain situations , but you can

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still make it . Um

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, one of the biggest lessons my mom

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used to always tell me was like this too shall pass

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, and during a lot

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of the situations that I've been through , they

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do pass . We

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do survive and

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hopefully

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learned some great lessons going

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forward , so we didn't have to repeat it . But guess what

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? I can not can share that too . I've

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made some of the same mistakes over and

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over again and

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survived , especially financially

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. I can tell you I've

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been a nurse for over 22 years and

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the amount of money

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that I've made over my career

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that I have wasted , not

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knowing how to use it in

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a way that would benefit my family , going

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down the line , just

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doing a rough calculations

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, I may probably about 2.1

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million dollars over a 20-plus

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year career . Now

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, had I had some

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semblance of financial literacy

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, do you know the amount of investments

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I could have made , the real estate I could

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have purchased , the , the

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, the financial

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holdings I

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could have amassed for my kids

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, the retirement counts

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I could have started for the kids , the businesses I could

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have invested in , if

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I knew what I knew now

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? But I'm

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gonna share that with

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you all because I'm hoping

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we can learn some stuff together . I'm hoping somebody

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gonna drop in the comments some things

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that I can do , that this community

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can do , to better our financial

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literacy . What has helped them , what

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are some of the same struggles they have had with

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their finances , so that we can

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get our finances together , so

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we can build a better future for ourselves and

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our children , so that

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we don't have to continue to struggle financially

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, which now messes with our

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mental , which

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now makes us behave in certain ways

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. That , though , that financial

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illiteracy can

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cause us to have that

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life where we're always robbing Peter

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to pay Paul . We're always worried about

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finances . We're always making

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decisions because we're worried about finances

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, whether it's staying in certain relationships

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that we could have gotten out of or staying

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at certain jobs that have been messing

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us up mentally . There are

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so many things that

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we do all in the name of

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like our finances , whether

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we are literate or illiterate

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. Now , of course , if we have some financial literacy

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now , we're making better situation . We're

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making better decisions about our

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finances . We're investing in ourselves

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so that we don't have to work as hard or stay

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in places that we don't want to be in . Okay

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, so sharing

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our failures

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for lack of better words or being

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afraid of failure can

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hold us back . I

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have now accepted that failure

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is an absolute

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part of my journey

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to success . I have accepted it . So

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, now that I've accepted it , I'm

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not afraid to make certain

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situations . I'm not afraid to leave my job

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. I'm not afraid to quit nursing at

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20 years and go out there and start businesses

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now . Did

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it work out how I wanted it to work out ? No , it

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did not . I am not one . I have not gone

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back to work , but

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guess what ? The lessons

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that I have learned when

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I left and

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how I handled my finances

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will now help me going

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forward . Manage my finances

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going forward better . Okay

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, make better investments . Now

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, like we are in the process of buying

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our first multifamily

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property . When

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I bought my house for the first time at 38

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, I

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didn't know I should have probably bought my multifamily

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first and how they look

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at multifamily properties as

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liability versus the asset

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. How could I use

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that to buy another property ? Like I didn't know

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that . I know that now I

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know about investments

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and stocks . I didn't know that now . I didn't know that

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before . So again

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, I'm not afraid to tell you about

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where I quote , unquote

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, messed up or my failures

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, because I'm hoping that

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somebody listening to this podcast

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or someone that's listening to this podcast

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knows somebody that

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is going through that struggle and they might need that encouragement

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, they might need that inspiration . So

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don't be afraid to share your story , because

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there is somebody currently

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going through whatever you're

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going through and they need to see somebody else

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win . They need to see somebody

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else survive and not just survive

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thrive . Because let me tell you something

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I'm tired of just surviving . I'm

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tired of just surviving . I am ready

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to thrive . So that means

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I'm not afraid to cut off certain

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relationships , I'm not afraid

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to leave states , I'm

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not afraid to leave jobs , I'm

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not afraid to do or tell anybody

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about my situation because I'm not afraid

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to fail . I have failed

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many times and

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guess what ? I was A-OK

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and sometimes , to be

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honest , came out better than

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I did prior to failing

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. Say

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, for instance , I had to sell my house . I

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started business . It didn't work

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, but guess what ? I have now gone back to work . I

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can now use that resource , that money

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, to make purchase

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, to purchase property . I can

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make that . I can come out here and start a

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podcast and not to be afraid

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that nobody might never listen to this

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. Now , I hope not . I'm

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hoping that this will be the fastest

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growing podcast ever

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. I want to break records . I

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want people to be like man . Have you heard that ? Have

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you heard that ? When we win Shy

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, that Keyata she is , she's

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something else . But let me tell you something

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. I learned this and I wasn't afraid

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to do this , and I did that because I

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listened to the Spark Access and I want this to be about like

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that . So , anyways , sometimes

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mind and our business can

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hinder us . Now

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, there , I do believe there are some times we should mind

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our business and I do believe we we

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do have to be very selective about what

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we let out about ourselves , but not

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to the point of

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isolation . I

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don't want you to feel alone , cause

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you're not alone , especially

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women that look like us . We need to

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know that we are not alone . We

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, because of some of the situations

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that we are in , we

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feel quite isolated , whether we are

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a single parent , or whether we are

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in

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a marriage but feel like a single parent

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, or whether we , whatever situation

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it is , we might

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feel alone , but

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we're not . Okay , you

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are not alone . Hell , if

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ain't nobody else is going through the situation . I

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might have been through the situation , or I know someone

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that's been through the situation . Okay , like

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, don't nobody know , especially

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women of color , especially black women . Don't

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nobody know this struggle that we live

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like us , and

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I think sometimes we can be each other's toughest

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critics . Okay

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, sis , so you're not alone

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and I want us to go on this journey

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together . Okay , okay

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, all

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right . Thank you so much for listening

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. I appreciate

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your time . I know how precious

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time is and I thank you for spending your

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time with Lil

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ol’ me . Love y'all bye .