Episode Transcript
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de. de
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mi I'm
2:07
not about to be the provost, but
2:09
I'm talking about why I'm so single,
2:11
but like so many episodes have
2:14
passed, nobody knows. So now I'm
2:16
just having fun talking to people
2:18
I find interesting. My guest today
2:20
is a multi-junio nominated singer and
2:23
songwriter. She was featured on Lotto's
2:25
hit song lottery, her new single,
2:27
Nothing But Love is out now.
2:30
And I found her on Instagram a while ago and I was
2:32
like, ooh, this is fun, my hair is blacker.
2:36
It's Luca! Yay! Hi!
2:39
Thank you so much for doing
2:41
this. Thanks for having me. Luca,
2:43
so your first
2:45
language is French? It is. Okay.
2:49
So when did you learn English? That's a weird question. Yeah.
2:52
Yeah, no. When you say that, I'm like, I
2:54
don't know if I've ever really thought about that.
2:57
Do you just like remember being bilingual
2:59
from the jump? Well
3:02
because I'm from Toronto, I feel like
3:04
you have to speak English. You just have to speak English.
3:06
So I did grow up going to French school before
3:09
I kind of got over and went to this English school. But
3:13
I don't know, I guess since I was in elementary
3:15
school, you had to know how to speak English to
3:17
like survive in Toronto. So the
3:19
question came out wild. The
3:22
reason for the question is I've been
3:25
trying to learn Spanish and I find it so
3:27
hard. So somebody who grows up being bilingual, I'm
3:29
like, well when does it happen? How
3:31
do we do this? They say like under the age
3:33
of four is when it's like the easiest and fastest
3:35
time to learn a language. And
3:37
I think because I grew up with so many people
3:39
that only spoke English, that's why I don't really have
3:42
an accent. Like
3:44
you wouldn't know I speak French if you just heard me speak English. And
3:48
have you been to France? I haven't, yeah.
3:50
And I have family there so I don't know what's
3:52
up with that. You gotta go! Hopefully so. I've been
3:54
to Switzerland though and like the
3:56
French side. I've never been to Switzerland.
3:58
Did you get hit? on in Switzerland
4:00
was anybody like... I did. All they called
4:03
me down the streets was hilarious because I
4:05
looked nothing like either of them was like,
4:07
Rihanna, Nicki Minaj. And it's just because my
4:09
hair is orange and I feel like they
4:11
were not used to seeing someone with such
4:13
bright hair walking down the street. I was
4:15
like, I'll take it. It's giving me bad
4:17
calorific. When I was in Africa,
4:19
this man called me Medea. So I
4:22
would say you got a better
4:26
compliment. I did win. You can't lie. Yeah,
4:28
you definitely did win. But it's so funny
4:30
to me that somebody who's like, here's a black
4:32
person I know, I'll yell that at
4:34
you. They were literally yelling it
4:36
across the street. I was like, after a while I was like, wait, I
4:39
think they're talking to me. I'm like, this is actually very insane.
4:41
Am I Rihanna? Am I
4:43
Nicki Minaj? Am I Beijing? I'm fortunate to
4:45
have you. I'm one of them. Period. So
4:48
are you single, dating,
4:50
married? Don't want to say?
4:52
I'm single. Okay.
4:55
Are you looking? I'm open?
4:58
Mm hmm. That's the I'm open.
5:00
Okay. That's so vague. Like, are
5:02
you just so you're like, I'm
5:05
open for something to come to me or
5:07
you you're open to like
5:09
start trying? What does this open mean?
5:12
I'm like, if
5:14
you're ha and you listen to this, come find me
5:16
a talent. You know, I'm like, yeah, I'm open to
5:18
somebody. I guess I'm looking a little bit, but not
5:20
too hard. Because it's not even like I'm on anything.
5:23
Oh, you're not on the apps or anything? No. Were
5:25
you ever? I was, I was, I was. But
5:27
then it got like really weird. I feel like when things
5:29
started moving more, like I would literally get people sing like,
5:31
Oh my gosh, like I listened to your music. Oh my
5:33
gosh, this and that. And I was like, this is kind
5:36
of like odd. And there's just
5:38
weirdos sometimes. So I was like, I don't
5:40
know, maybe I'm meant to meet someone in
5:42
real life. So that's the
5:44
era I'm in is meeting somebody in real life.
5:46
But I'm like, I have to leave my house
5:48
to do that. I literally said that the other
5:50
day, like my friend was like, let's go out.
5:53
And I was like, yeah, I'm down with me.
5:55
Someone a couple hours later, I was looking at the clock and I was like,
5:57
I don't really have it in. I'm not gonna hold you. But I'm like, how
5:59
am I going to I'm not gonna ever meet somebody
6:02
if I never go anywhere. I know. And then
6:04
everyone's like, oh, maybe like all, like, you
6:06
know, someone should introduce me to somebody, but
6:09
I'll leave there. I
6:12
keep asking people to introduce me to somebody
6:14
and everyone's always like, oh, my friends are
6:16
garbage. And I'm like, okay, well.
6:18
Giving it code for, I don't know if they
6:20
like the thick girl. Man, that's
6:22
what it's code for, honestly, because I don't
6:24
know, this is LA. That never occurred
6:26
to me. Oh, sorry to burst the bubble. It's
6:29
okay to bubble up in burst. Damn.
6:32
I don't know. I feel like, I don't
6:35
know who's gonna send me with someone in LA,
6:37
who knows? Maybe I'm being like, maybe I need
6:39
to be optimistic. Maybe, how long have you
6:41
been in LA? A year. Okay,
6:43
so you're still new to LA. I love that
6:45
you're already jaded on LA. You're
6:48
just like, never gonna find anybody here. I
6:50
don't know, I think dating in LA is
6:52
just such an interesting place. It feels different.
6:55
It is different. I lived in New York
6:57
for a while and New York
6:59
to here is just, it's so different in a
7:01
way that I can't even describe. Cause
7:04
people's nights end earlier here and
7:06
nobody wants to be friends here. Unless
7:09
you have a lot going on. I guess.
7:11
But like, what I mean is, I
7:14
love just talking to people randomly. And
7:16
I feel like people are just like, oh, why are you
7:18
talking to me? And I'm like, but I just wanna have
7:21
fun. It's tough for me
7:23
to know who's being genuine and who's not being
7:25
genuine in LA. It definitely is hard. I
7:28
said earlier, I agree. It's hard to know
7:30
who's here for the right reasons. I
7:32
did say earlier that love doesn't just
7:34
come to your doorstep, but maybe it
7:36
will. I ordered a charger for my
7:38
phone, like
7:41
an aux cord to go in my car. And
7:43
instead of sending me an aux cord, I
7:45
got sent a dildo. That's
7:48
something you can be in love with. Yeah,
7:51
I feel like I could be in love with
7:53
it. I thought Amazon, I was like, do
7:55
Amazon send this to me? Cause they were like,
7:58
you need a dickey. I
8:00
am screaming. It was wild because I looked
8:02
on Amazon and it was like, ooh, delivered.
8:05
And I said, ooh, my charger's here. And
8:07
then I opened it and I was like,
8:09
this is a huge box for a little
8:11
charger. And then I opened it
8:13
and I was like, this is a dildo. Oh
8:15
my god. And it came with Analube. And I
8:17
was like, lube is lube.
8:19
I think you could just throw it in the old
8:22
place. I didn't know there was a difference. Me either.
8:24
But it specifically said Analube. And it's not a lot.
8:26
And it's a very big dildo. And I was like,
8:28
y'all think I have more girth
8:30
than I do better. I am screaming.
8:33
Like, how do we get here? Because
8:36
I was like, lube maybe can come to your door.
8:39
It can. Or I don't know if it's just a
8:41
movie thing or if it really can show up at
8:43
the door. I don't know. The dildo came to my
8:45
door. And then
8:47
I was like, should I return it? But
8:49
then I was like, well, you don't return a gift
8:51
godsend. I was going to ask you,
8:53
did you keep it? It's currently
8:57
just right by my front door. Because I'm like,
8:59
how about this? At this point, it clearly was
9:01
meant to be yours. It was meant to be.
9:04
But it was just so. So then I ordered another
9:07
charger. This literally happened
9:09
like two days ago. So I ordered another one.
9:11
And I wonder if I'm going to get my
9:13
charger or another deal. Like, do you think you're
9:15
going to be like, ha, ha, ha. I'm just
9:17
trying to figure out if this company is selling
9:19
chargers and dillos. Maybe. I mean, you have to
9:21
be multifaceted nowadays. So I'm just wondering what's going
9:23
on with that company. It
9:26
was so interesting and strange. Has
9:28
anything weird like that happened to you? You're like,
9:31
no, lady, your life is fucked up. No.
9:38
I mean, I'm sure there's been a lot of things like that. Or
9:41
maybe I ordered something that did not arrive. But I
9:43
don't know. So
9:46
have you had any relationships? Have
9:48
you been in one? I have not.
9:50
You haven't? I've been. I've
9:53
dated somebody. And I guess you
9:55
could call it a relationship. But who knows what
9:57
they were calling. It wasn't a thing
9:59
that was. super cohesive. I'm like geez
10:01
you really want my business out there on the street.
10:03
Well you don't have to answer if you don't want
10:05
to. No um I don't feel
10:07
like I have been and I guess I'm a
10:10
little comforted in knowing like nowadays I feel like
10:12
a lot of people don't feel like they've
10:14
genuinely been in a relationship. I've been
10:16
in situationships. Same. Like people people have
10:18
like me have been on dates but
10:21
I don't think I would call any of those people
10:23
like an ex. I don't know what they call me
10:25
but that's on them. That's such
10:27
an interesting thing. I wonder if anyone would
10:30
call me an ex. Or
10:33
they're just like that crazy bitch I dated for a
10:35
little bit. I don't know. You know you watch like
10:37
some of those shows on reality TVs and they're like
10:39
the ex said this and that. I'm like you would
10:41
say something about me. I'm like I don't feel like
10:43
I have an ex. You know I'm like am I
10:46
damaged goods? What's going on? You're not
10:48
damaged goods? No. I don't think I
10:50
am. I think we're living in a
10:52
weird time period honestly. Yes.
10:54
I think a lot of people haven't
10:56
been with somebody seriously and then I
10:58
think a lot of people just
11:01
are trying to date right now and
11:03
are not finding that person. Yes. I
11:05
also think reality television
11:07
is it like speeds so okay
11:09
I love 90 day fiance and
11:12
they have this offshoot called the single
11:14
life Mars. I think I talked about
11:16
this last week. Mmm zoop zeez. Anywho
11:18
so this guy Tyrae goes on a
11:20
first date with a woman and he
11:23
goes I feel like we have a
11:25
connection. You don't know that bitch. You
11:27
don't have a connection. You know you
11:29
think she's attractive. Yeah. Simply don't have
11:31
a connection and then he was like
11:33
and then he on the first date
11:35
was like how do you feel about
11:37
long-distance relationships because they were both on a trip
11:40
in New Orleans. Right. They live down there and
11:42
I'm like on a first date. That's insane.
11:44
Again you don't know this person. I don't
11:46
know if we're all a little damaged from
11:49
the pandemic. We are. You know so I think that
11:51
like in our brains we're like skipping like I hear
11:53
some of the questions. Yeah I hear some of the
11:56
questions people ask you on a first date. I'm like
11:58
that would make me run away. Like why? I was
12:00
talking about all this. But at the same time, I
12:02
think people also just feel like I don't have time
12:04
to waste, so. I need to know where you stand
12:06
on this. Cause I don't want to waste my time
12:08
if I live this far. But I'm
12:10
personally not really doing that long distance thing right
12:12
now. I don't think I
12:14
would do a long distance relationship. But if I
12:17
met somebody that I was interested in, I think
12:19
I would. You might be open to it. Open
12:21
to try. But again, I don't know you. Do
12:23
you know what I mean? I want
12:26
to say I'd be open to it, but I feel like the last
12:28
person I spoke to, that's
12:31
the thing I spoke to that was like long
12:33
distance. Like I would just need
12:35
you to do a lot for me to even think about it.
12:37
And I think a lot of people in their mind think that
12:40
they're doing more. So
12:42
it's just probably not for me. What do you
12:44
need someone to do for you? Oh. I
12:50
don't know, you can send me some gifts. You
12:52
can like, you need to show me that I'm on your mind.
12:54
You know what I mean? Like, and it can't just be you
12:56
texting me and calling me because I think
12:58
anybody can do that. I'm not looking
13:00
for a pen tap. So I
13:02
feel like you kind of have to do some
13:04
like actions. Like, you know what I mean? I
13:07
don't know, you were thinking about me. Maybe you even
13:09
send me a letter in the mail. Like that would
13:11
be cute. That'd be romantic. Like I just feel like
13:13
where's the romance nowadays? And don't just send me flowers
13:15
when you do something wrong. Cause I feel like that's
13:17
the only time I get flowers. So
13:20
like the last person that like sent me flowers recently,
13:22
like I never responded back to them. Like I just didn't
13:24
care. It just was like, why
13:26
did you send me those flowers? I literally don't talk
13:28
to you. Is this what it's like to have standards?
13:32
If someone sent me, I dated someone
13:35
who got me flowers once and
13:38
I was like, oh my God. Every
13:40
time they did something wrong, I'd be like, well at
13:42
least they got me flowers at one time. Yeah, no,
13:45
it's not worth it. I guess not. Cause they're gonna
13:47
do the same thing again and be like, oh, I
13:49
can just get you back the moment that
13:52
I sent her some flowers. But you
13:54
keep the flowers. I'll keep
13:56
them, but I won't even post it. Like I'm not
13:58
even gonna let you feel special. by you
14:00
seeing it online. Like you're not gonna see the
14:02
book there ever. Like I'm not even gonna thank
14:04
you. I'm just gonna have it. I don't know
14:06
you. Oh my God. I need a
14:08
little bit of that. I don't have any of
14:11
that. If you buy me flowers and if you
14:13
say hello to me, I'm like, oh my God,
14:15
I'm in, like I had a server the other
14:17
day at a restaurant and he said more than
14:19
like, can I take you order? Like, and I
14:21
was like, I'm gonna marry him. I love him
14:23
so much. And then I tried so hard to
14:25
flirt with him, but then I just ended up
14:27
being weird. And then it turned out he knew
14:30
who I was. So then I think he liked the weird, but
14:32
then I don't know. And
14:34
then I was like, if you know who I am, are
14:36
you gay? And then he's like, but maybe you're bi, but
14:38
then you can't just ask somebody that. Right, I mean, I
14:41
do sometimes, but I think I get in trouble for it. So now
14:43
I just learned to not talk anymore. Like
14:46
you really, Lou, stop asking questions. Like please
14:48
don't. Just don't ask. I mean, I
14:50
wish. I don't know. I think
14:52
it's really important to have standards in dating, especially
14:54
if you're like, you know, I've been single this
14:56
long. I might as well stay this
14:58
way until I find someone who treats me the
15:00
right way. And yeah, I
15:03
don't know. Like, no, like if you
15:05
do me wrong, my cutoff game is very strong.
15:07
I wish. I'm
15:09
not like that. Cause
15:11
I'm like, there's goodness in everyone and
15:14
your goodness will shine through. I'm manifesting
15:16
that for you. This year in 2024,
15:18
we are cutting them off. We're
15:21
like literally walking them everywhere. So
15:23
you can get me up. Blah, blah, blah,
15:25
blah, blah. Yeah, like literally. Someone
15:28
asked me like, oh, like this person was talking about who? Oh
15:31
my God. But like genuinely you're so
15:33
in your, locked off in your
15:35
head that you're literally wondering who. That
15:37
who? I've never wondered who. I'm
15:39
like, I love you. This
15:46
is like a hopeless romantic where. I love
15:48
that. I feel like when you click with
15:50
someone, you're like, well, why can't this be
15:52
a lovely happily ever after? I just want
15:54
to be with the person that makes me
15:56
feel free and comfortable enough to really believe
15:58
in that happily ever after. but like
16:00
most people like just talk a
16:02
big game and like I'm like huh. I
16:06
feel comfortable with people, not like
16:08
immediately, but I'm also a very
16:10
strange person. So I don't realize
16:12
I'm doing weird shit until they're
16:14
like oh that was weird. And
16:16
I'm like oh no I guess
16:18
I'm comfortable with you. I
16:22
get comfortable, I get comfortable a bit too quickly so I
16:24
get it. Mm-hmm, I just, I
16:26
don't know. What are you looking for in
16:29
a partner? What am I looking for treating
16:31
you well? Yeah I think someone who like
16:33
could be romantic. You know I
16:36
said guess but it's not really just guess. I think
16:38
it's literally someone just thinking about you and doing nice
16:40
things because they are thinking about you on their
16:42
regular day to day life because if I
16:44
was walking down the street and I was
16:46
with somebody again, like we are together. And
16:50
I saw a top that I felt like you would like, I
16:52
would get it, like you know what I mean? I would be
16:54
like just because like at the service I think there are beautiful
16:56
things. Open the door,
16:58
like we need some chivalry. Like
17:00
hold the elevator. Those are basics
17:03
so it's actually very sad that
17:05
you could, very sad that this
17:07
is a thing you even have to mention
17:09
because that's very basic. But I don't
17:12
know someone who's like smart, like teach me
17:14
some things. I wanna teach
17:16
you some things, like teach me some things. Someone
17:19
who holds me to the highest regard because I'm
17:21
a queen. So you
17:23
should, someone who's ambitious because
17:26
I don't know, there's nothing less attractive
17:29
than somebody who just doesn't wanna do anything with
17:31
their life. For me at least, I need you
17:33
to be on your stuff because I work hard. And
17:37
also it would be nice to
17:39
date somebody who's kinda had more freedom. A
17:42
little more than change in their pockets because
17:44
I wanna go on vacations. And
17:47
the kinda schedule, I'm sure you lead a
17:49
similar one is things could be
17:51
really, really busy. You might just find out you have
17:53
a couple days three out of nowhere. Yes, like let's
17:55
go on a trip. Let's
17:57
have fun, I don't know. It's
18:00
a couple of things we're looking for, I guess. It's
18:02
a couple of things, but I also think it's
18:04
fully attainable and doable. It's so attainable. Oh,
18:07
I like the whole, are you
18:10
thinking about me? I dated
18:12
somebody who I thought of often because I
18:14
really liked them. And they
18:16
liked anime, so I would buy them
18:18
socks with anime characters on it. Oh,
18:20
that's so cute. And then at one
18:22
point, they were like, hey, just
18:25
so you know, these socks are terrible
18:27
quality, and they're really uncomfortable, like
18:30
I know you're thinking of me, but I simply
18:33
won't wear them. And
18:36
I was like, wait, where did you find this
18:38
person? The
18:40
world. Oh my gosh. But then
18:42
I kept forgetting. So if
18:44
someone tells me. And then you kept getting
18:46
the socks. Yes. If someone tells
18:48
me something is bad, like if you tell me
18:50
you're allergic to shrimp, every time I eat shrimp,
18:52
I will offer you some, because I
18:54
know in my head, you said
18:56
something about shrimp. You like shrimp? And
18:59
it's like, no, shrimp kills me. And
19:01
with these socks, every time I saw them,
19:03
I'd be like, oh my God, these are so cute. I'll get them.
19:06
I mean, to me, because you're not killing them is
19:08
not shrimp. It's the thought that
19:10
matters. So it's like, come on. Like, I
19:12
think it's nice that you kept doing that,
19:14
but they said it was sweet. They
19:17
were like, it's sweet. And you have good intentions,
19:19
but your execution is very bad.
19:22
Oh my gosh. Oh my
19:24
gosh. I mean, I think that is just so nice,
19:26
and you weren't even willing to do that. I wanna
19:28
come home to somebody who's cooking me dinner, and
19:32
letting me just relax. And then
19:34
you wanna give me a massage. Like, these
19:36
are the things I want. These are the things
19:38
I see for me, I deserve. I like that.
19:40
I could never, I don't like massages, and I
19:42
can't imagine a loved one giving me one. No.
19:45
I don't really like being touched, which is a strange
19:47
thing. That's fair. Yeah. So
19:49
massages is like too, it's too much touching.
19:52
The whole thing is touching. I used to
19:54
like be so ticklish. Really?
19:57
Anytime someone dies for me, but now I'm looking at a massage. I
20:00
work hard no, but it's
20:02
there's something pretty intimate about
20:04
it It's so intimate and
20:06
then I start thinking about why
20:08
are you touching me? Not during like
20:10
a massage like sometimes I'll be talking to a dear
20:12
friend and they'll like touch me to emphasize a point
20:15
and like If their hand stays I go well, why don't
20:17
you want your hand back? And I like
20:19
a lot of people are like that stop
20:21
thinking about it I feel like recently a
20:23
lot of people are like that looks from my friends Oh,
20:25
yeah, we like we don't like hugs like oh, okay Which
20:27
is so interesting to me because I feel like growing up
20:30
especially in high school You walk in and everyone wanted to
20:32
give you a hug now. I'm realizing I
20:34
guess people don't want to hug anymore But it's okay.
20:37
I'll hug somebody. I actually prefer a hug
20:39
to a handshake But it's
20:41
like it like if someone touches
20:43
my back. I'm like why that's why
20:45
are you doing that? Yeah, what's going on? I
20:47
mean I get back because I've always said that
20:50
like I've always
20:52
said that I feel like kisses are more intimate than sex
20:54
and Like
20:56
I don't know what it is about it But I just
20:58
feel like there's something so intimate about your mouth and
21:00
somebody else is not swapping some stuff Oh,
21:03
I don't know. Yeah, but I think I might just be
21:05
backwards in my brain when someone's inside of you. I think
21:07
there's That's it. I don't
21:09
know they can be inside and you can just
21:11
disconnect You could just
21:13
be like I'm not even here. But when they're
21:16
kissing you like it's like well, you're so close
21:18
I guess Maybe
21:20
something is wrong with me. No, I don't think
21:22
there's anything wrong with you. I'm also weird Sometimes
21:25
I'll kiss somebody and I'll open an eye. Oh,
21:27
yeah Wait
21:32
that reminds me of like when my brother
21:34
got married I'm such a bad sister, but
21:36
like when my brother got married he and
21:38
his wife That was the first time
21:41
they ever shared kiss and it
21:43
was such an uncomfortable thing to watch them
21:45
do for the first time and his eyes were fully open
21:47
and I like Wait, I
21:49
yeah, but I also laugh like me and my
21:52
sister could not stop nothing. But your brother's business
21:54
out there, but He
21:56
had never kissed. No You
21:59
know the He's on his
22:01
super Christian stuff. Oh, okay. But I
22:03
was like, not even a kiss. Like I'm like,
22:05
and to do it for the first time in
22:07
front of everybody and your eyes be open, it
22:09
was honestly one of the funniest things, also
22:12
disturbing things. I'm so sorry, I love you. Oh,
22:14
because he wasn't to this. He
22:17
will. And he's gonna think
22:19
back to his magical wedding day and
22:21
be like, it was weird. Everyone thought
22:23
it was weird. It was so weird. It was so weird.
22:25
I was like, haven't you ever watched movies?
22:27
Like close your eyes. And
22:30
his eyes are big too. It was very much
22:32
giving out of pocket. Like out of pocket. He
22:34
was like, I can't believe this is fucking happening.
22:37
This is magical. We're eyes open too. I don't
22:39
think so, but it was one of the most
22:41
funniest because first of all, when you kiss someone,
22:43
you gotta have coordination. Yeah. You gotta know like,
22:45
is it a straightforward head left, head right? Like
22:47
what are we doing? Are we grabbing the head?
22:49
This is very much giving like an alien to,
22:51
it was bad. It was bad. He's like, this is
22:53
my first day on earth. I don't know how to do this. It was all
22:55
bad. It was funny though. Luke Howlett, we have
22:58
to take a break. This
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apply. And we're
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back! That is funny that
25:30
you say that a kiss takes coordination. It does! A
25:32
lot of people don't know how to kiss and they
25:34
really think they do. Have you ever had a bad
25:36
kiss with somebody and then the next time you kiss
25:38
them it was good? Like
25:42
better. I don't know if it was
25:45
good. I also, if the first kiss
25:47
is bad, I truly feel like it's
25:50
simply kind of seals the deal because that's like if
25:52
you don't know how to work your mouth on
25:54
the mouth I don't know where else you know how to work
25:57
it. Yeah, but at first kiss. when
26:00
it's good is such a fucking treat.
26:02
It is, it is. And I just, I
26:04
don't know. I feel like a lot of people do not know how
26:06
to kiss specifically men, and a lot of them really
26:09
think they do. I don't know why. So, you
26:11
know, I think, you know, when I kiss someone here and there,
26:13
and they're like, wow, like, that was such a great kiss. I'm
26:16
like, I know, but like, you gotta work on it. Wait,
26:18
people are telling you? Yeah. People go, that
26:20
was a great kiss? Yeah. Is it me? Maybe.
26:23
I'm joking. Well, no,
26:25
I think like when you share something like a good
26:27
time, or even just like really good kiss, you feel
26:30
something, but like, you know, I feel like when
26:32
I'm told, I'm like, yeah, I know,
26:34
but like, you gotta work on it, because I was a kid
26:36
and I was kissing the inside of my arm to make sure
26:38
that I knew what I was doing properly. I used to do
26:40
that a lot. So like, maybe y'all need to do that. Because
26:43
a lot of people think they're great at a lot of
26:45
things that they're not, and it's like, let's
26:47
take some feedback back so that we can be better
26:49
for the next person. Like, wow. rate
26:52
it, one to 10, if you like it. No,
26:55
but actually, I think you can like feel it
26:57
when it's a really good kiss. I think you can feel it
26:59
too. Oh wait, maybe I have.
27:01
Can you feel it? Can you feel
27:03
the love? You can feel it. Can
27:05
you feel the love tonight?
27:08
The peace, the evening. I
27:10
don't think I'm gonna do the other
27:13
half. Is that the same song? Yeah.
27:15
Oh. I wasn't,
27:17
I was singing. Am I even an artist?
27:19
The Elton John version, and not the movie
27:21
version. Oh, okay, my bad, my bad. Hi,
27:23
Elton. Oh, I love
27:26
Elton John. Great
27:28
person. Benny and the Jazz. We're
27:31
lucky to be living in a time with all these
27:33
like living legends. I know. I mean, a lot of
27:35
them. Who's your favorite? Who's still
27:37
living? Yeah. Oh. Or
27:41
a dead one. Oh wait, wait a phrase
27:43
left. I love Rihanna, like, hey, Rihanna, me,
27:45
you're my new bestie, but living
27:47
legend, Celine Dion, like I'm
27:49
Canadian, so. Celine Dion. I was at the Grammys
27:52
the other day, and. Ooh, you went to the
27:54
Grammys? Yeah, that was my first time, and I
27:56
saw her walk out, and I swear I almost
27:58
fainted. I almost cried. was like
28:00
no freaking way especially cuz like you know
28:02
she's been dealing with a lot so I
28:04
was not expecting to see her walk on
28:06
stage that was like I guess so
28:08
I was like
28:11
oh I love her yeah literally
28:13
I've always been like it's giving
28:15
my wedding song because
28:18
you love me oh
28:20
like that's like I love her I like
28:22
that song I drove all night
28:24
that's not how it goes I drove all
28:26
night that's not how it goes do
28:30
you know what song I'm talking about? It's called
28:32
I drove all night Jordan how does
28:35
it go? I drove all night
28:37
to get to you
28:39
I drove all night that's
28:44
what I want someone who's into me to do
28:46
like I'm not trying to do that not gonna
28:48
hold you but I need you to like give me the like I
28:50
drove all night to get to you like talking
28:53
to you makes me wonder if
28:55
I don't think I'm worthy of
29:02
someone driving all night because I'm like someone
29:05
driving all night that's dangerous you better get
29:07
to sleep you get to me in the
29:09
afternoon if it takes that long you should
29:12
listen to my very first EP I don't
29:14
have one EP out and it's actually called
29:16
worthy it was
29:19
my me coming around to the point
29:21
where I realized that I was worthy of all
29:23
the best things and I know in the
29:25
movies and shows like girls like us they don't
29:27
get the like the love story and this and
29:29
that so like getting to the point where you're
29:31
like no I'm worthy of this and I'm gonna
29:33
wait out wait out until I have someone
29:35
make me feel like I'm
29:37
the prize here's the thing I'm
29:40
fucking tired of waiting and I'm
29:42
horny yeah and I didn't
29:44
say you don't give it up to anybody in
29:46
that period but but well I don't want to
29:48
just be fucking no more I'm like really I
29:51
don't want to have one-night stands I don't want
29:53
to have to like figure out what works with
29:55
this person I want like rely I want a
29:57
Toyota Corolla you know I want to fuck some
30:00
I know it's reliable and good. Why get
30:02
it to Or a
30:04
camera because it's economical reliable and we'll
30:06
get you over. No, those are actually
30:09
not great They break down
30:11
a lot. They they might be
30:13
luxury But people are always
30:15
like a Porsche a Porsche
30:17
is better than electric Porsche. I
30:20
can't remember to plug you in. I Just
30:24
feel like I get what you're saying because I think a
30:26
lot of people are in that weird in between where you're
30:28
like Do I like I
30:30
don't want to hook up with anybody anymore and
30:32
I want like a real-life relationship But I also
30:34
need to get a little some cuz yeah, we
30:36
need to get a little wet here and there
30:38
Yeah, and like it's a really weird in between
30:40
but I feel like we're all feeling it as
30:42
it people right now So nice,
30:44
there's knowing that and I
30:47
mean you loved it come to your door So at least
30:49
there's that in between right now Black
30:52
dildo. Oh my god A
30:54
black person skin. Yes, and
30:56
I was like don't scare me a little bit like
30:58
I like real I don't know
31:00
what it is. But seeing the veins on the
31:02
real color of anybody's skin I'm like, it's you
31:04
just made this a little too realistic Very
31:08
realistic and my assistant she dropped
31:11
off coffee I was
31:13
doing some press stuff So she dropped off coffee for
31:15
me and she was like left it next to the
31:17
dildo and I was like, that's yes Let
31:20
me explain why it's just there. Oh
31:23
It is still in its bag which says keep
31:25
away from children, which I thought was pretty funny
31:27
They meant the bag. Yeah, they can choke a
31:29
child, but I was like, okay I
31:33
don't know this I don't be morbid or anything But I always think
31:35
like God willing I get to live a
31:37
very very long life But I'm like, what
31:39
if you like passed away and your family had to
31:41
come and clear out your room? Yeah,
31:43
all the stuff they would find. Yeah,
31:46
here's the find out you're not that
31:48
good. Yeah oh
31:50
my god, I have
31:52
a will and It is
31:55
a lot of it's not legally
31:57
enforceable because you can't enforce people to do things
31:59
after you But there's
32:01
soft requests for my best friend. Please
32:03
let my friends come and clear out the room first. And one
32:05
of the things says Here's
32:07
where my sex toys are if you could
32:09
just like get rid of them. You're smart.
32:11
Oh, you know what I should do I should
32:14
put gloves in there just so they don't have
32:16
to like touch my stuff. Oh,
32:18
I mean Yeah, I
32:20
love that you already have that in the world because
32:22
I was like really thinking about it I was like,
32:24
oh my gosh, like that would be insane Yeah,
32:27
just leave instructions like my best friend knows exactly where
32:29
the printout of it is I
32:32
told her where it is. I just I'm Just
32:35
doesn't scare me because it happens to it'll happen
32:37
to us all of us. So I just like
32:39
want to be prepared But
32:42
yeah, I'm like just you know clean out some stuff. My sister
32:44
doesn't need to see that Yeah.
32:47
Yeah, that's smart. That's more maybe
32:50
Together I will say one of the requests
32:52
sound legally enforceable is I would like googly
32:55
eyes placed on my face why Just
32:58
scare people just cuz it's funny
33:00
and I'd like my body to still be funny
33:02
when I'm not in it You said even in
33:04
death. I'm gonna be silly. I'm silly as a
33:06
bitch I love it and I wrote I think
33:08
I told my sister this I was like I'd
33:10
like my sister to bang the casket every time
33:12
someone came like comes by so my eyes do that.
33:14
I Am
33:16
screaming. I think I haven't
33:18
been creative enough. No get creative
33:20
like death happens death is
33:23
sad But like death
33:25
can also be a celebration
33:27
or funny if yeah, I said had a
33:29
sense of humor. Yes So
33:32
yeah, I don't like I want people obviously to be sad
33:34
about me, right? But I also want them to be like
33:36
to he that dumb bitch I'm on but
33:38
I need them to be sick to their stomach about
33:40
me like My stomach them like
33:43
that's what I need. I need you to be like,
33:45
I can't live like my life will never go on
33:47
Like Lou is gone like why is life? That's
33:49
what I I need the dramatics You're one of those
33:51
like super crawlers like I need you to be
33:53
in front row front row front row super cry super cry But
33:56
I also remember that I was really funny. I
33:58
would like my partner to like be so
34:00
overcome with emotion at my funeral. And
34:02
I've requested that my current partner has to
34:05
talk about my pussy. But
34:08
I want them to be so overcome
34:10
with emotion and be sobbing, being like,
34:12
her pussy was so nice and I
34:14
loved it. I am screaming, but I'm
34:17
also confused. I don't know why you're
34:19
scared about anybody in your family finding
34:21
your dildos and sex toys when clearly
34:23
you're requesting such wild things. Here's the
34:25
thing, never is a thought
34:28
connected in my brain. Never
34:30
is a thought making sense as
34:32
a cohesive thing. You are absolutely
34:35
right. It doesn't matter who cleans it
34:37
out because you're gonna hear all about it at the
34:39
funeral. They're about to hear on this very now, like
34:41
in 10 seconds. How do you
34:43
write a love song? I
34:45
don't think I'm the best love
34:47
song writer. I'm still learning.
34:50
I know how to write love songs to myself, but
34:53
writing love songs, I'm like, I don't
34:55
know, I'm dramatic. I can
34:57
make anything sound super
34:59
dramatic. And everyone's gonna be like, who's
35:01
that song about? If you're saying you've never really
35:04
been in a full relationship or never been
35:06
in full blown love, I'm like, I
35:08
mean, Shakespeare wrote about fairies in the woods.
35:10
I'm sure he never met a fairy in
35:12
the woods. Shakespeare wrote about
35:14
the tempest, which is a storm and
35:17
I'm sure he never went through that. Romeo and
35:19
Juliet, were they real? Who knows? Yeah,
35:21
it's called an imagination. But I actually
35:23
do write about myself. Everything is
35:25
about myself, but I might drop, like make it a
35:28
little more dramatic, because we trying to
35:30
sell some records. It's not a check. I'm just, I want
35:32
to make it a little more dramatic than it is. And
35:35
then I'm like, I don't know, maybe I just don't claim
35:37
a lot of the situations I've had as love. Maybe
35:40
it's a me thing and I mean the
35:42
word love or a little distance from each
35:44
other. And it's hard for me to understand what
35:46
it fully means. It's
35:48
some trauma, I guess. Sure. I
35:51
guess my question's dumber than
35:53
what you were answering. I literally don't understand
35:55
how people write songs. Like, how a song,
35:57
like, okay. It's
36:00
like she wants something to wash over her. It
36:11
sounds Christian but not. It's like Jeff Gethson. I
36:13
don't know if it's sexual or Christian but it's
36:15
one of those two. Sing more of it.
36:18
I'm on my knees. Are you in
36:20
the right key? No. No,
36:23
never. I'm on my knees. I'm on my
36:26
knees. I'm on my knees. I'm on my knees. I'm
36:28
on my knees. Okay, I'll
36:30
pick a different song. I think you just like, I
36:33
think some people write things about their reality and
36:35
some people just like, I don't know, at one
36:37
point I need inspiration. During the pandemic I needed
36:39
inspiration because I was like, I'm
36:41
not living a life. I'm literally stuck inside
36:43
my apartment, my home the whole
36:45
time. So I would watch movies and shows and
36:47
like, or like write about my friends, like relationships.
36:50
Like that was all really fun to do. But
36:53
usually I just write it about myself and
36:55
I feel like maybe when I find that
36:57
deep love, I'm gonna be able to write
36:59
like that legit love song.
37:02
I know how to write about heartbreak because I feel like everyone's
37:04
been heartbroken. Even if it wasn't like
37:06
in a relationship kind of manner.
37:09
Everyone's been heartbroken in some sort of way. And
37:12
there's been people that we really liked and they broke
37:14
our heart too. You
37:16
know, so writing the opposite is so much
37:18
easier for me than to write love songs. Also because I
37:20
think a lot of love songs are just so corny and
37:22
really hard to like, you know, like there's like
37:24
to perfect the love song is beautiful. A
37:27
lot of times it doesn't happen that way. What's your
37:29
favorite love song? Do you have one? Oh,
37:32
I was just talking to someone about, well, one,
37:34
obviously we love The Selene's Yarn because you love
37:36
me because it's giving wedding song. But
37:38
there's a song. Do you know who Tamia is? No.
37:41
Tamia Tamia. She has a
37:43
song called Still. Still is a
37:45
date. Like I remember being a kid and listening to
37:47
it. Like I'm actually very dramatic, but there's,
37:49
anyways, it literally is about she's
37:51
with, whatever.
37:55
She's been dating this guy and he was like in
37:57
the NBA, but she was with him since they were
37:59
like kids. And now they're like grownups
38:01
and they have kids and all this stuff
38:03
and their kids are adults. But
38:06
anyways, the song is like, still feels like the
38:08
first time we met and I kissed and I
38:10
told you I love you. Oh yeah, I do.
38:12
I do know that song. Get along like teenagers.
38:14
Like I'm like, wait, the
38:17
fact that that song is still real to them,
38:19
that you still love this person since you guys
38:21
were so young to now, I'm like, oh my
38:23
gosh, I just think it's such a beautiful song.
38:26
And who knows who I'm gonna end up marrying one
38:28
of these days. We might know each other for two
38:30
years, but we gonna play that song as if we
38:33
knew each other because we were children. Do
38:35
you think as a, how do you
38:37
identify? Plus size, the fat.
38:41
I'm a size two, what are you talking about? No,
38:44
I think. Sorry. I'm a plus size girl.
38:46
I'm a thick girl. I'm a plus size girl. I didn't
38:48
call myself fat. I just. Oh. The
38:51
way you said no. I
38:53
was having that conversation with my friend a couple of
38:55
days ago. And
38:58
I was like, that's just like, I've never
39:00
done that. Like, that's, I don't know. I
39:02
don't identify. I'm
39:04
a plus size girl. I just feel like
39:07
fat is something that you have on your body.
39:09
It's not who you are. Yeah, I mean,
39:12
because of that, like it's hard for my brain
39:14
to like think like that. And I was just like growing
39:16
up, like because it was like more of a diss, like
39:20
I'm not gonna call myself that, but you're
39:22
not gonna hurt my feeling if you call
39:24
me that either, babe. I'm hot. Yeah. I
39:26
feel like growing up, people be like, you're
39:28
fat. I'd be like, and? Yeah, I love
39:30
that. What else? Oh, you were a bad
39:32
bitch early. You want to talk about your
39:34
mom not being able to pay her bills?
39:36
Yeah. We can get anything back. Yeah, like
39:38
I just, it never, it didn't
39:40
bother me the way it bothered other kids. Right.
39:42
That's why I say. Did you feel
39:44
like you had to be funny early? Like you were deflecting from that a
39:46
little bit? Sorry,
39:49
I'm losing energy. You know what I mean? I
39:52
feel like I've been asked that before. And
39:55
I feel like maybe as I got older, I realized
39:57
that was a way to like be
39:59
funny. so people would not call
40:02
me fat, but I also really didn't care if
40:04
you called me fat. Anything I felt about my
40:06
body was solely myself, being like, oh, I wish
40:09
I looked like the other kids, but then if
40:11
it's like, someone was like, you are fat, I'd
40:13
just be like, okay. I
40:16
think it comes more from having ADHD. And
40:20
being in a classroom and
40:22
a teacher saying something, I'm like, that reminds me of,
40:24
blah, blah, blah, blah, more like, I can't, I just
40:26
was bouncing around, like bouncing
40:29
off the walls, and it just manifested in
40:31
a funny way, I think. Right. But
40:33
I'm sure deep down there's like some, yeah, if I
40:35
make them laugh first, they won't make fun of me, but
40:38
also nobody made fun of me because I was like,
40:40
a good time. Right. And like my
40:42
older sister was known as like, Nicole's sister. Like
40:45
she came for me. She loves to see it in
40:47
the both of us when you were younger. And they're
40:49
like, oh, you're her sister. I always feel bad for
40:51
the people because I remember a couple of those people
40:53
in high school where like, you're the younger person's sibling,
40:55
and I'm like, that, like, you gotta step it up,
40:57
step it up. Yeah, talk
40:59
a little bit more. Yeah. But as
41:01
a plus size person, have
41:03
you found dating to be harder or?
41:07
Yeah, it's definitely a little tougher. I
41:12
don't know, I think that a lot of people,
41:15
I think there's a good amount of people that
41:17
are into plus size women, but they're scared
41:20
to say like out loud, therefore
41:22
they copy, they'll like hook
41:24
up with plus size girls in secret.
41:27
Yeah. And
41:29
not in real life. And I'm like, I'm
41:31
nobody's secret. So until you're
41:33
like yelling outside like, Lucala, I
41:35
love her. Like she's that one. Like, please don't
41:37
talk to me. Because it also
41:39
tells me, like I'm actually just embarrassed for you.
41:42
Like imagine being a grown
41:44
man and you're afraid to like love the
41:46
person you love just because you wanna seem
41:48
cool for your friends. Like it's actually
41:51
absolutely insane to me in my brain. Yes.
41:54
Yeah, it's definitely different, a little harder
41:56
to date as an
41:59
output size woman. And out
42:01
plus-size women. When I was in the closet,
42:03
it was a little easy. Right, right. I
42:05
was bound to be in the closet. Yeah, and
42:07
it's so funny because a lot of the men that
42:09
want to hook up with plus-size girls are like hot
42:12
to the world. They're like men that are
42:14
like musculars are like great quote-unquote bodies as
42:16
the world would say and the actual vision
42:19
of like what a lot of these girls
42:21
want. It's funny because like when I'm on
42:23
social media like on TikTok, sometimes I'll see
42:25
like a girl that's like plus-size and she's
42:27
a fine-ass man. And every one of them
42:29
comes to all like, how did you, they
42:31
must have been friends first. They were friends.
42:34
She must have gained weight. And I'm like,
42:36
no babes, like not everyone is
42:38
into you. And I think it
42:40
hurts people more I think because some
42:43
of them might work out super hard and
42:45
they might do everything they think they can
42:47
do, get some work to like become the
42:49
vision of what they think the world
42:51
thinks is attractive and then he goes after that
42:53
one. Uh-huh. You know, but
42:55
I'm like. So whenever I see like
42:57
a bodybuilder type with a plus-size girl,
43:00
I'm like, obviously,
43:02
he likes to lift heavy things. I
43:04
kind of make sense. Opposites attract. Opposites
43:07
attract, but also it's like, how can I
43:09
get another workout in? Lift
43:11
this big bitch up and
43:13
like move her around. That's another
43:15
workout. We love to see it.
43:18
I don't know why it like blows people's
43:20
minds. I really just wish people would just
43:23
like date and love the like date who they want
43:25
to date. You know, like because you'll
43:27
you're the one that's gonna be miserable at the
43:29
end of the days. And I
43:31
think it has to do with like high school culture
43:34
and like being middle school and all that kind of
43:36
stuff. Like you carry that into adulthood. But
43:39
I'm loving to see like people nowadays
43:42
are just like people are getting
43:44
better at it. A little bit better at
43:46
it. A little. But it's definitely I
43:48
feel like it's hard to date as a plus-size
43:50
girl in LA. Like in many places, but like
43:52
in LA because LA is definitely the place
43:54
of like rewarding very
43:57
small things. Yeah. Now we're in
43:59
the Ozem. era of LA.
44:01
Yeah. Where you could just whittle
44:03
yourself down to being a
44:06
little fumbulina if you will.
44:08
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back. It is interesting.
46:58
I feel like I've dated dudes who
47:00
like implied it would be nicer if
47:02
I were smaller or like they're
47:04
like, oh, I like your personality, but like, why
47:06
don't you go to the gym more? And I'm
47:08
like, what? I once I know I've talked about
47:10
this because a weird years ago, but I hooked
47:12
up with this dude who said, just because
47:15
I work in fitness doesn't mean I don't
47:17
like or don't not like your body. And
47:19
I was like, wait, what?
47:21
It's just like annoying because, you know, I
47:24
think a lot of like many a
47:26
times when men have been attracted to me, they literally
47:29
be like, I love your body.
47:32
Like, okay, do you go up to
47:34
a size two and like the first thing that
47:36
rolls out of your mouth is I love your
47:38
body? No, like, I don't need your extra dose
47:41
to feel confident. I'm a bad bitch. I know
47:43
I am. Like, you really don't have to make
47:45
me feel any better or any different about my
47:47
size. And it always made me feel uncomfortable because
47:49
I felt very sexualized automatically instead of
47:52
like, I like you. I
47:54
just want to get to know you. Yeah, I
47:56
think that's something I had to unlearn because when
47:58
I was younger, I was like, I'm I'm fine
48:00
with this body. It is what it is. I'm
48:03
gonna continue eating, so that's the choice
48:05
I'm making. But
48:08
then I would like sexualize myself to try
48:10
to make men like me. Because I was
48:12
like, I like me, but I don't think
48:14
they like what I'm serving. And now,
48:16
in my old age, and I'm
48:18
now 62, I'm
48:20
trying to unload. You look great for 62.
48:22
Thank you, black don't crack. But I'm trying
48:25
to like unlearn that to be like, well,
48:28
you can have the goodies, but just
48:30
like you gotta work a little bit for it. And
48:33
I shouldn't lead with my sexuality. I should
48:35
lead with like, I'm a nice person who's
48:37
in this world looking for love. And that's
48:39
been fucking hard, because I'm also horny. I
48:42
think I've said this like four times. Yeah, I said,
48:45
how you gonna get them after this tonight?
48:47
I don't know. I'm going out with
48:49
a friend tonight, and our goal, our whole goal is
48:51
to speak to at least one man each. Oh
48:54
wow, I love that for you. But
48:56
we're not in our hookup air anymore, remember? No,
48:58
but. Again, your thoughts don't connect. They don't connect.
49:02
Well, just talking to, I don't have to
49:04
go home with him. Smart, smart, smart, smart.
49:07
You know? Yeah. It's just like
49:09
getting the practice in, because I dated someone for a
49:11
little bit, so I feel a little out of practice
49:13
flirting. Right. So I'm like, God, I want to meet
49:15
someone in person, so I gotta get the practicing, I
49:17
gotta flirt with them. But then I'm also like, what
49:19
if we meet in a bar tonight? Yeah. And
49:22
then he's like, I'd like to see you again next week.
49:24
And I'm like, okay. And then I see him again
49:26
next week, and then maybe he's like, do
49:28
you want to go to dinner the week after that? And I go,
49:30
yes, so now that's three weeks in a row. And then we start hanging
49:32
out during the day, and then we go see movies, and then we're
49:34
dating, and then we're never married. I'm
49:37
screaming. Someone told me recently that I
49:39
don't know what the really good flirt. I
49:41
don't know what that means. Okay. I
49:44
think I smile a lot. Okay, I'm gonna practice
49:46
flirting with you. Okay, let's do it. Hi,
49:49
how are you? I'm good,
49:51
how are you? Wait, let me start over. Yeah, who are
49:53
you trying to be, Urkel? What's happening? I
49:56
instantly got afraid. Okay, hi.
49:59
Hey. Do you come here often? Here
50:01
and there. How about you? Oh my goodness. Today
50:04
is my first day. I'm bad at this. You're
50:06
scaring me. You should, uh,
50:09
I think you have to loosen up a little bit. You want to try this Cosmo?
50:12
Uh, yes. I'm trying
50:14
to make eye contact with you. Why are you
50:16
looking away? I know, because you're, this is overwhelming.
50:19
Why? And you are really good
50:21
at this. Am I? Yes. Oh
50:24
my God. Ha! Ha ha ha
50:26
ha. Okay. Wait, wait. Let
50:28
me try again. You don't have to be cool, actually, because I
50:30
feel like you, I feel like
50:32
there's somebody for everybody and, like,
50:35
if you're trying to be the cool thing, I feel like that's not
50:37
going to work out. You just have to be yourself.
50:39
Wow. But also just, like, wink a little bit. Twinkle
50:41
a little bit without... Wow, you just said I wasn't cool.
50:43
No! Ha ha ha ha ha. No! I'm
50:46
not cool either. No, I'm so far from cool. I'm just, I'm
50:48
a fun person. I'm not a fun person. I'm a, I'm a
50:50
good time. Not, I'm not cool. Okay.
50:55
Hi. Hey. Do you
50:57
come here a lot? Here and there. Actually,
50:59
this is my first time I've been here. Oh,
51:01
well, I'm hoping I get to see you more.
51:03
Oh my goodness. That, I like that.
51:07
Would you like me to give you a drink? The cosmology
51:09
are really good. Or you give me
51:11
more sex on the beach. Would you like one? Oh my
51:13
goodness, I think I have it like a sex on the
51:15
beach. Okay, I got you. Oh, wow. You're
51:17
going to pay for my drink? See, I... Yes.
51:21
As long as we make this our beach, now I'm joking. Ha
51:24
ha ha ha. You're, I can't... No!
51:27
Isn't she good at that? I try. Like,
51:29
you were making me bashful and I was
51:31
like, we're in a recording studio. Oh,
51:33
I love that. There's no threat of going
51:35
home with you. I was like, oh
51:37
my, I just, I would love a drink.
51:39
Sometimes you have to twinkle the eyes a
51:41
little bit. You know,
51:43
like when you see someone across the room, actually just the other day, like
51:45
when I was at the dining parties, yeah, you're doing me well. I
51:48
saw this guy across the room and then I got
51:51
up to eat because they don't really be giving you
51:53
no food at the very same time. They really don't.
51:55
And I got up to grab some like thing to
51:57
eat really quickly and he's like, didn't
51:59
you see me? like looking at you from across the room, I
52:01
was like, yeah, but why didn't you come up to me? Like
52:04
I just, I'm confused. Like I'm not coming up to
52:07
you. Like you better be on your man league for
52:09
me. Like, you know, so I'm like, why didn't
52:11
you like come up to me? Like I don't get it. He's
52:14
like, we're here now. Need whatever
52:17
you've been drinking. You know what? I'm really
52:19
good at like setting people up. Like I've
52:21
always been like, I'm great at it. And
52:23
the people I set up stay together for,
52:26
it's not forever for a long time. I'm
52:28
gonna think about my role deck. I can't set
52:30
myself up though, but everybody else, everybody else, like,
52:33
I feel like in another life, I was loose,
52:35
cupid. Maybe you were. And
52:37
I had a psychic tell me in another
52:40
life, I was a princess and I was
52:42
like, yay. A
52:44
good princess. And I was like, people
52:47
wait on me, but I see it
52:49
for myself. Yeah, okay. So I'm
52:51
looking for someone with a little bit of money,
52:54
a job, no dream. Not
52:56
a job. Okay,
52:58
a career. I
53:00
want them to be living their dream. Yes. I
53:03
would prefer someone tall, but I can do a short
53:05
thing. What's tall? I
53:08
think I'm really tall. How
53:10
tall are you? Turns out five, five. But
53:13
girl, bye. I
53:15
really wasn't waiting for you to say something crazy. I'm five,
53:18
five. I thought I was five, seven for
53:20
a really long time. Me too. I think
53:22
we just have big, big energy. I think
53:24
so too. I genuinely always thought I was
53:26
tall and I went to the doctor's and
53:28
he's like, you know, you're like five, five.
53:30
You're like, you're like three quarters. My
53:33
best friend is five, seven. And in pictures, I'm
53:35
always shorter than her. And I was like, you're
53:37
lying about your height, your six foot. And she
53:39
was like, no. It's always the shorties. My friend's
53:41
a good five too. And she tells her when
53:43
she's five, nine. And I'm like, it's not
53:45
giving that at all, at all. Relax.
53:48
That's me, but yeah, five, five. So like to
53:50
me, I'm like, I want someone who's six, five.
53:53
But like anything over like five,
53:55
10 is tall, I guess. Oh,
53:57
that's cute. I don't know. But
54:00
I want someone who's like six foot, but people be lying
54:02
all the time. So I'm like, oh, lie. I don't know
54:04
what six foot actually is. Oh my gosh, one time I
54:06
went, one time I went
54:08
on a date with this guy from the online world,
54:10
and it very much said like six feet or six
54:12
feet or whatever, and I showed up and met, and I
54:14
was like, this person is my height. And
54:17
I'm just confused because did
54:19
you not think I was ever gonna find out? Like, did
54:21
you not think about like the process about when we
54:23
meet? Uh-huh. Insane. Maybe
54:26
he thought you were gonna be shorter, and then he
54:28
was like, you should just automatically be taller, and it'll
54:30
be fine. Is that the worst date you've been on?
54:32
Oh, that was really bad, actually was really
54:34
bad. And he kept trying to touch my hand, and
54:36
I was like, uh-uh. Like
54:38
I just, and it's not because he was short.
54:40
I just think it's weird that you would say that, and
54:43
have such a big- Was he trying to
54:45
hold your hand across the street? Yeah. He
54:48
was like, uh, I need, I need, I need your hand.
54:52
I just like, I don't know why people lie about
54:54
that. I'm just very confused. I don't know why
54:56
people lie in general. I think a lot of girls
54:59
would be okay with dating like
55:01
short kings, like, as long as you're lying. I
55:03
think so, yeah. I don't know about me, but I think a lot
55:05
of girls would be okay, they should. You know,
55:07
I'm a sicker girl, so like, I
55:11
wanna feel a little protected. Yeah, that's
55:13
what I- In certain ways. And then,
55:15
I think that's why like, men that
55:17
are taller. But, uh,
55:19
yeah. What's the worst date that
55:21
you've been on? Oh. That
55:26
was a bad one, honestly, because I remember like, after
55:28
like, the dinner and stuff, he was like, oh, do
55:30
you wanna go back and watch a movie? And like,
55:32
you know, like, add his house. Like, no.
55:34
But there was this one time, it's
55:37
the only time that's ever happened to me, where I
55:39
went on the date with this guy in New
55:41
York, and he was just like,
55:43
so on me, whatever. We get on this, we get
55:45
to like, the date, and
55:48
like, I think like, halfway through, he
55:50
was like, to the radio, like, oh yeah, it's gonna be like, a separate
55:52
bill. And like, I don't think I realized he
55:54
had said that. And then like, at the end
55:56
of it, like, it really was separate.
55:58
And to me, like- to me
56:01
it was just more funny than anything because it had
56:03
never happened to me. But
56:05
to me it was more hilarious because afterwards he
56:07
was like, let's use this, let's use that. And
56:10
then he was texting me like, oh I can't
56:12
wait to see you again. And I was thinking
56:14
like, what in your mind ever made you think
56:16
we were ever gonna have eye contact, any
56:18
messages or anything? I'm so sorry, maybe I'm a little
56:21
old school in that way but if you're taking me
56:23
out, you are taking me out. I am not listening
56:25
to the singer. I'm not the girl to fake it
56:27
to you and be like, when
56:29
it comes and then you go and pretend
56:31
that you're, no I'm gonna stand there still
56:34
face. I'm not gonna move,
56:36
I pretend. And I wait
56:38
for them to go, oh I got it. And
56:40
I go, do you? Okay. No, and I know
56:42
some men say they think it's nice if you
56:44
at least offer, I'm not offering. Because
56:47
what happens when they're like, okay. Can't
56:50
you got it? Like no, I'm so sorry, I'm
56:52
not gonna lie to you at all. You
56:54
gotta make me feel like you have to be
56:56
chivalrous. But what if you asked them on a
56:58
date? I would never ask them on a date,
57:01
I'm sorry. Really? I wouldn't, I
57:04
don't think I would. Would
57:06
you ever propose? Are you the type, I was gonna
57:08
say, are you the type of girl to give on
57:10
your knees and propose to
57:12
someone? That's what I was gonna ask you. Never,
57:15
like no, my African roots,
57:18
I don't know, the answers will come and be
57:20
my ass. Like absolutely not, no. I don't think
57:22
I would ever propose to someone because I don't
57:25
necessarily want to get married. But
57:28
I feel like I've asked people out on
57:30
dates. You have, so did you pay? What
57:32
is that life like? No, wait,
57:34
I'm trying to think, I
57:38
don't think, honestly, I think to all my
57:40
sisters that do it, you guys are the
57:42
strongest warriors, I'm happy you do it so I don't have to. But
57:46
I just like, I don't know. I think
57:48
for me, I'm in control of
57:50
a lot, actually I don't know how
57:52
to say it. I'm
57:55
like a boss in what
57:57
I do for music. So like, I
58:00
like the idea of like, maybe you are the
58:02
boss somewhere at home. Ah, I get that. I'm
58:04
kind of like hot. That's
58:07
like when businessmen like dominatrixes because
58:09
they're in the boardroom as the
58:11
boss and then waiting steps on
58:13
them. Like I'm manifesting a get ready
58:15
we're going out. Cars coming at 730.
58:18
Yeah. Yeah, I like that. I
58:21
think it's kind of sexy. I like
58:23
that in theory. Oh yeah, you
58:25
can only get that kind of treatment from someone you're
58:27
like attracted to because anyone else is like who are you
58:30
talking to? Anyone else is very
58:32
much like you better stop. Well
58:34
I just like, I
58:36
don't think I've ever dated anyone who's like
58:38
I've planned a thing we're doing this at
58:40
this time. Where's this? I've been to
58:42
everyone I've ever dated it's like we're gonna you want to go out
58:45
or you want to go? I
58:47
don't like that and it's hard
58:49
because I'm like
58:51
it's hard because like I can say like oh these are some
58:53
things I like and then you pick it out. But to
58:55
like I just need to take charge a little
58:57
bit if you're asking me on a date. Fair.
59:00
Like that I don't know to me it'd be like then that means you might
59:03
not know how to take charge in any other way and I
59:05
would like those are like what I relate to.
59:08
Mm-hmm okay so
59:11
we have like reached the end. I
59:14
do ask all of my guests if I've only missed
59:16
it maybe three or four times. Yeah. But
59:19
would you date me? Oh I
59:21
would you know. I like someone who's fun.
59:23
I think you're beautiful. I like someone
59:26
who gives a little funniness excitement but
59:28
also that is on their business because
59:31
some people are like some people are like
59:33
talk to you or too they're trying to
59:35
be funny too much and it's like I need you
59:37
to work. People nowadays just don't
59:40
want to work enough. I need you to make
59:42
some money so we can survive. So you're on
59:44
your shit you're beautiful and I don't know let's
59:46
see where this goes. Yes
59:49
thank you. Do you have anything you want to
59:51
promote? I
59:53
have a new song it's called nothing
59:55
but love. You know a lot
59:58
of times when you break up with somebody. I
1:00:01
think it's easier to say you hate somebody. It's like so much
1:00:03
easier. And if you did hate somebody,
1:00:05
it's easier to move on. But
1:00:07
this song is about being like, I still have
1:00:09
nothing but love for you. And it's
1:00:12
very heartbreaking. And stream it,
1:00:14
look how it eh. You like stream it,
1:00:16
feel bad? Yes, but then once you're over
1:00:18
the heartbreak, you can go listen to Hotter
1:00:20
Now or Pretty Girl Era and feel really
1:00:22
hot about yourself. I love that. I will
1:00:24
say this, whenever people hate their exes, it
1:00:27
really makes me sad, because I'm like, how
1:00:29
did you love someone? That you now hate. And
1:00:31
then you hate them? Like it got
1:00:33
so bad that now you hate them. I never
1:00:36
want that. I always like, it's
1:00:38
a weird, I don't know, I think it's such
1:00:40
a weird emotion. I think, I don't
1:00:42
know if a lot of them really hate people. I think they just hate
1:00:44
them because they can't have them. So it's easier
1:00:46
to say that you hate that person. But
1:00:49
I don't know, if you share something
1:00:51
so intimate with someone, how could you just one day
1:00:54
be like, you are nothing to me or
1:00:56
you are dead to me? That being said,
1:00:58
I'm the best at the block button. So
1:01:00
I don't know what I'm talking about. Not
1:01:02
me, everyone I've ever dated, there's an open
1:01:04
door. Really? Well if you wanna
1:01:06
just check in, see how I'm doing?
1:01:10
I'm gonna pray for you because the standards are
1:01:12
gonna get higher, the right person is gonna come
1:01:14
to you and love your weirdness and the body
1:01:16
and what you bring. I mean, I'm kidding, my
1:01:19
exes, it's not an open door. Most of them
1:01:21
are married. And by exes, I mean people I
1:01:23
dated for a couple months. You said both of
1:01:25
them are married. Wait,
1:01:28
so is it really close or is it only close because
1:01:30
they're married? Well, I mean,
1:01:32
now I've had so much distance with a lot of people I've
1:01:34
dated. And truly, I've only dated
1:01:36
someone for like a couple of months at a
1:01:39
time. Now
1:01:41
that there's distance, I'm like, oh yeah, this person really
1:01:43
was not a good fit for me because of X, Y, and
1:01:45
Z. This person was a bad fit because of this. So
1:01:48
I understand why they weren't a bad fit,
1:01:50
but in the moment of breaking up or not seeing
1:01:52
each other, I was like, but why?
1:01:54
I'm curious, I'm curious, have you ever
1:01:56
asked an ex, like why didn't it work out? No,
1:02:00
because I know. Do
1:02:02
you know what I mean? I'm like 99% sure. I
1:02:06
know. Really? Yes. Because
1:02:09
sometimes I feel like people should sell you on
1:02:11
the dream and then one day they just poof. Well,
1:02:14
I think it's when they sell you on the
1:02:16
dream and they poof, it was like, I
1:02:18
actually didn't like you like you. I
1:02:20
liked the idea of you. I
1:02:22
liked the attention you were giving me. And then I
1:02:25
found someone I clicked with better or I'm moving on
1:02:27
to somebody else that is giving me attention. And
1:02:29
it feels newer or fresh. So
1:02:32
I never think it's like I
1:02:34
did something because it's not
1:02:37
technically about me. You
1:02:39
are the main character in your own story. So
1:02:41
it might've been something I did
1:02:43
that made you feel a certain type of
1:02:45
way, but that feeling has nothing to do with
1:02:47
me. So I usually chalk
1:02:49
it up to like, we just weren't a
1:02:52
good match and you just
1:02:54
didn't wanna fuck with me anymore. Which is
1:02:56
like, you know, that's your prerogative. That doesn't
1:02:58
make sense. I think it's just hard to
1:03:00
find genuine people. It is, it is hard.
1:03:02
Especially being like a business woman in
1:03:05
these types of industries and a
1:03:07
crazy schedule. Yeah, I do have like
1:03:10
a very shitty schedule. Yeah, all
1:03:12
those things like back and forth. I think
1:03:14
we live in a world where a lot of
1:03:16
times women wait out for
1:03:18
men, but men are not used
1:03:20
to waiting out for women. No. That
1:03:23
lead these types of lives because I think some
1:03:25
of them feel emasculated. I don't know. I
1:03:27
don't know what it is, but. And a little intimidated
1:03:29
maybe. I don't know if I know. Yeah, I know.
1:03:31
All I know is base coming because I deserve and
1:03:33
you deserve. Yes, 2024. If
1:03:38
you like this episode of Why Won't You Date
1:03:40
Me? You can rate it. You can like it.
1:03:43
You can subscribe. Leave me a review on Apple
1:03:45
Podcasts. If you write me a nasty come on
1:03:48
to Why Won't You Date Me podcast@gmail.com,
1:03:51
I will read it. This
1:03:54
nice person said, I can't wait to see
1:03:56
your show next month. And I have a proposal
1:03:58
to enrich your trip. A next morning. smash
1:04:00
session with breakfast included. Nom nom nom
1:04:02
nom nom nom. I'll ram you with
1:04:04
a massive strap on and like torture
1:04:06
your clit with your Saragon until your
1:04:08
juices get so creamy and frothy, ew,
1:04:10
that I can scoop them out into
1:04:13
a bowl. Then I'll tickle your butthole
1:04:15
until you snart, sneeze fart, and release
1:04:17
a bunch of dingleberries for me to
1:04:19
add to the cream. Ew, I don't
1:04:21
have dingleberries. And to top it all
1:04:23
off, I'll swoop on in
1:04:25
my big old mouth to pleasure you until
1:04:27
you squirt. Then hold the bowl up to
1:04:29
catch that as all the sweet
1:04:31
toppings. Bon appetit! That was nasty.
1:04:34
It just kept on going. It
1:04:36
did. This one's even longer. Oh
1:04:38
my lord. Thank you
1:04:40
so much. Bye bye. Thank you for having me.
1:04:46
You've been listening to Why Won't You Date Me?
1:04:48
with Nicole Vier. This show is produced by
1:04:50
me, Marv, with guest research. I want
1:04:52
to thank you for the executive
1:04:54
produced by Adam Sacks, Nick Weow, and
1:04:56
Jeff Ross at Team Coco, for still
1:04:59
looking like Paula Davis, Gina Batista, and
1:05:01
Maddie Ogden. Got a dirty message for
1:05:03
Nicole? Write it to Why Won't You
1:05:05
Date Me podcast@gmail.com for a chance to
1:05:07
have it featured on a future show.
1:05:10
Thanks for listening. We'll see you
1:05:12
next week with a brand new
1:05:14
episode. See you, people, pop. Bye bye. This
1:05:19
is it. The Team Coco production.
1:05:27
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